How to Cook and Eat the Rich

by Sunyi Dean

A man is offered the opportunity to partake in an exclusive, subscription-based eating club for those who wish to dine on human flesh. But he may have bitten off a little more than he can chew.

Genres: Horror, Short Stories, Dystopia, Fantasy, Fiction, Science Fiction, Adult

9 pages, ebook

First published January 18, 2023

About the author

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Sunyi Dean is a writer of speculative fiction. Originally born in Texas and raised in Hong Kong, she now resides in a Yorkshire cottage full of music and books.

Her most recent novel, THE GIRL WITH A THOUSAND FACES, was inspired by her upbringing: her old high school was once a mission house on the edge of the original Walled City, and her grandparents survived the Japanese occupation during WW2.

In her spare time, she likes buying whisky, collecting dumbbells, and dying in jiu-jitsu. She also founded the Hugo-nominated Publishing Rodeo Podcast with fellow Tor author, Scott Drakeford.

Reviews

[persephone ☾]

would have been a hundred times better if only the title wasn't giving everything away 🙃

[Thibault Busschots]

A man joins a very exclusive club for the rich to feast on human flesh.


Really well-written short story that quickly manages to hook you. It’s a strong concept of meat becoming so rare and expensive that even the rich turn to human flesh. But it’s such a shame that the big twist at the end is completely spoiled by the title.

[HaMiT]

از اونجایی که قبلاً کتاب گوشت لطیف است رو خونده بودم، ایده‌ی دنیاش برام جدید نبود، ولی پردازشش تو حجم کم خوب بود
شاید اگه توی عنوانش همه‌چیو لو نمی‌داد بهتر می‌شد :))

[Medisa]

وقتی یه داستان کوتاهه دیگه نباید همه‌چیز رو توی عنوانش بگه که.

[lorena ♡ (might be back)]

yes, this little story (it's only 9 pages!!) is exactly what the title says (and it comes with recipes!!). i giggled. bon appétit, i guess 😋

[Fiona Knight]

I suppose you must have heard the rumors, the little whispers in those elite clubs you’re so fond of, about Neil’s Delicatessen. For a man like yourself, wealthy and widely travelled, purveyor of exquisite dining and unusual culinary experiences, it’s only natural to feel that guilty curiosity, that questing after the ultimate experience . . . human flesh. Especially in this day and age, when other kinds of meat are so increasingly rare.

A shame about the title, but this had such a satisfying payoff that I couldn't say I didn't enjoy it regardless of whether I saw it coming or not.

Free to read here: https://www.tor.com/2023/01/18/how-to...

[tazzy!! ☆ ⋆˚꩜｡(semi-ia)]

cutesy little short story about cannibalism, my favorite! loved the way it was told and all of the useful recipes! i’ll be sure to try them out! (THIS IS A JOKE)

“we may be peasants in comparison, but enough peasants can slay a dragon.”

[Lizzie S]

Blech. This was as disgusting as it was intended to be. Hutter (human butter) really got me. Predictable ending.

[Sara]

I loved it! and not just because it was about cannibalism(though that was intriguing enough) but because of the way it was narrated.
From the first page I was hooked by the storytelling. The narrator pulls you in, speaking directly to you while vividly bringing the scenes and images to life in your mind.
I don't think anything I write here can spoil it more than what the title already reveals. :))) This book is what its name says.
Thank you HaMiT for this recommendation!

Jan 2025

[queenie]

sunyi dean never fails to amuse me with her stories and i just love that for me.

[james]

bit boring

[Rebecca Crunden]

“Did you hear about the cannibal who was late for dinner? He got the cold shoulder!”

A dark dark dark little tale about greed and scarce resources in a polluted, destroyed future that has been ruined by those who take from those who have none to begin with, and still want more. Very well written and the twist was WHOA.

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[Elle (ellexamines on TT & Substack)]

Very very fun short story! You can read this here.

[~:The N:~]

3.5 stars.

While I found the story enjoyable, the title revealed the twist prematurely. A different title might elevate my rating.

You can read it too, here.

[Ash]

We cook and feed the rich to the rich

[andrea]

a little on the nose with the title? maybe. but i would read 3000000 pages of this. apparently, an eat the rich theme works well for me lol

[Shannon]

"Let them eat themselves to death."

[Shirin (unavailable) fictional men only]

Me

Thinking

TITLE?!

We are not total monsters, after all.

Aren't we?!!!

[Sara☽༊‧₊˚ (semi-hiatus)]

"Yes, that’s more like it. Kneel gently, as if in church, and let the wall support your weight. Rest your eyes, lean your head upon your chest. It’s nearly over, and you won’t feel a thing. That much I can promise. We are not total monsters, after all. Bon appétit, monsieur."

―୨୧⋆ ˚ this was one darkly humorous & insanely creative novella. I loved the concept of the whole club, the reason why human flesh is so delectable etc until that plot twist like wtf - we need more unique and unhinged stories that totally aren't socially acceptable, but are enjoyable all the same.

also, hu-mutton?! that's brilliant lmao.

"Try hu-mutton, and you’ll never go back to regular mutton ever again! (Not that you have a choice, since the lambs are all silent.)"

"Let me spell it out unequivocally. You are here to be butchered, you scum, parasite, money pig, bank grubber, greedy bastard landlord, and useless pen pusher. For the first time in your worthless life, you’ll serve a higher purpose."

"Of course, the funny thing—and this is a joke, of sorts—is that human life remains as cheap and accessible as ever. Your average human has as little worth as a cow, while being in better nick than those poor, diseased animals. Ironic, since they are little better than cattle themselves, most of them; stupid, greedy, always reaching for handouts. And at least cattle have a purpose, to feed their keepers, whereas such folk give nothing back to society."

[Elaine]

I love the cover of How to Cook and Eat the Rich.

Yes, the title gives away the premise but it still made me want to read it.

This short story reminds me of what I might find in a Tales from the Crypt comic.

I love the author's writing but I wished this wasn't so short.

Would have loved more exposition, just to flesh out the world building.

[Meishuu]

Exactly what it says on the tin, this was quirky and fun, but why would you ruin your plot twist in the title?

[ren !!]

i loved this! love the cover, simply gorgeous art style. adored the way it was written, simply perfect for this story (and so flowy and easy to read, too). it reminds me of one of my favorite video games - 'donut county' - but darker. i really think this would make a really good video game, actually!

[luna]

liked the concept, but it felt very unfinished

[Arina]

Remains my favorite short story of all time. Twisty, gory, clever, funny; it's got it all!

[Barb]

Quick and sharp commentary on our dwindling resources and how the wealthiest among us always get more than their fair share.

[Tala🦈 (mrs.skywalker.reads)]

fun i want more

[Olive]

Opening a new restaurant, feel free to stop by, it's sure to be killer!

[Riska Sleepless]

This was fun

[Dusti]

This short story revolves around a subscription service for an incredibly exotic meat… human flesh. It feels weird to say that a story about cannibalism is funny and enjoyable to read, but that is how I ended up feeling about this one. I found it amusing and I enjoyed it. It’s a quick humorous horror story for those who are into that kind of thing! I honestly would love it even more if this was turned into a full short novel. Overall, I think the author accomplished what they were aiming for!

[Persy]

”Bon appétit, monsieur.”

A fun cannibalistic foray into class differences, though I wish the title would have been a little different to keep more of the surprise going for the reveal.

Reminiscent (or a subversion) of A Modest Proposal by Jonathan Swift.