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Watch Me Die
Harvey Mapes is a 26-year-old security guard who spends his nights in a guard shack outside a gated community in Southern California, reading detective novels, watching reruns, and waiting for his life to finally start... which happens when Cyril Parkus, one of the wealthy residents, asks Harvey to follow his beautiful wife Lauren.
The lowly security guard jumps at the opportunity to fulfill his private eye fantasies and use everything he's learned from Spenser, Magnum, and Mannix. But things don't exactly go according to the books...or the reruns. As Harvey fumbles and stumbles through his first investigation, he discovers that the differences between fiction and reality can be deadly.
The lowly security guard jumps at the opportunity to fulfill his private eye fantasies and use everything he's learned from Spenser, Magnum, and Mannix. But things don't exactly go according to the books...or the reruns. As Harvey fumbles and stumbles through his first investigation, he discovers that the differences between fiction and reality can be deadly.
224 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 3, 2005
776 people are currently reading
721 people want to read
About the author
Lee Goldberg
157 books2,141 followersLee Goldberg is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of over forty novels, including Malibu Burning, Calico, Lost Hills (the first novel in his acclaimed "Eve Ronin" series), 15 "Monk" mysteries, five "Fox & O'Hare" adventures (co-written with Janet Evanovich), and the new thriller Ashes Never Lie, the second in his "Sharpe & Walker" series.. He's written and/or produced many TV shows, including Diagnosis Murder, SeaQuest, and Monk and he co-created the Hallmark movie series Mystery 101.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 162 reviews
May 25, 2022
A fun light/dark humor novella!
Harvey Mapes is a security guard at a gated community in Los Angeles. Not much happens during the night shift and Harvey spends a lot of time reading detective novels and watching old detective tv shows. Dreaming of being a PI himself, when a homeowner, Cyril Parkus asked Harvey to tail his wife, Lauren, he readily accepts. Soon Harvey came to the realization that being a real detective isn't as easy as he once thought!
Lee Goldberg did a fine job with Harvey. He's sort of quirky and humorous, you can't help but root for him with his first PI gig using tricks he learned from book and tv heroes. Hearing familiar fictional detective names reference was an added bonus, my favs are Magnum PI ('80s) and Elvis Cole. 🥰
An enjoyable quick read/listen. 147pages or 5hr 42m
Harvey Mapes is a security guard at a gated community in Los Angeles. Not much happens during the night shift and Harvey spends a lot of time reading detective novels and watching old detective tv shows. Dreaming of being a PI himself, when a homeowner, Cyril Parkus asked Harvey to tail his wife, Lauren, he readily accepts. Soon Harvey came to the realization that being a real detective isn't as easy as he once thought!
Lee Goldberg did a fine job with Harvey. He's sort of quirky and humorous, you can't help but root for him with his first PI gig using tricks he learned from book and tv heroes. Hearing familiar fictional detective names reference was an added bonus, my favs are Magnum PI ('80s) and Elvis Cole. 🥰
An enjoyable quick read/listen. 147pages or 5hr 42m
May 28, 2022
Security Guard Harvey Mapes spends most of his time with his nose in detective books or watching detective series on TV. He daydreams of being a detective, and is suddenly given the opportunity to turn that dream into reality, or maybe just into a nightmare. Interesting enough story-line, but for the most part, it is just a vehicle for weak humor, especially around women’s body parts and masturbation. While I was reading, I was almost sure this must have been written in the 1980s and so shocked to see it was published as late as 2005. A reminder of what I thought was risqué and funny back before I grew up.
February 8, 2024
Harvey Mapes is a security guard of a high-end residential complex. The most interesting part of his work is when a coyote sneaks up with a dead pet and stares at him. All the excitement is from the numerous detective books that he reads. He often fantasizes about becoming a famous PI like the famous fictional detectives McGee, Spenser, Elvis Cole.... His fantasy comes true when one of the residents asks him to follow his wife.
And he gets more than he bargained for. Thus begins the story of Mapes using his knowledge from fictional work to investigate and dig deeper even when his employer asks him to stop.
I liked the plot line and the writing. I even liked the humour, though it was downright gross and felt like written by a teenager.
The resolution of the mystery surprised me.
Bonus was the reference to lot of detective fiction, most of which I haven't read.
The ending looked like an opening to new series, but doesnt look like he followed through. Lee Goldberg has already authored many book series, so he might not be interested in starting a new one.
Lee Goldberg is my go-to author and now that, I have read through almost all his books (except Jury series and Diagnosis Murder), I am eagerly waiting for his next book (Sharpe, Walker and Eve Ronin)
And he gets more than he bargained for. Thus begins the story of Mapes using his knowledge from fictional work to investigate and dig deeper even when his employer asks him to stop.
I liked the plot line and the writing. I even liked the humour, though it was downright gross and felt like written by a teenager.
The resolution of the mystery surprised me.
Bonus was the reference to lot of detective fiction, most of which I haven't read.
The ending looked like an opening to new series, but doesnt look like he followed through. Lee Goldberg has already authored many book series, so he might not be interested in starting a new one.
Lee Goldberg is my go-to author and now that, I have read through almost all his books (except Jury series and Diagnosis Murder), I am eagerly waiting for his next book (Sharpe, Walker and Eve Ronin)
March 8, 2018
Author Lee Goldberg has what most Mystery/Thriller writes lack; a literary sense of humor. Private security guard Harvey Mapes works the graveyard shift on the gate of an exclusive Los Angeles suburb reading detective novels. Since he's up on all the TV and fiction detective series, he feels entirely qualified to accept an offer from wealthy resident Cyril Parkus to follow his beautiful wife Lauren and report back if she's unfaithful. He discovers he has a knack for detecting until confronted with Lauren's sudden jump off a freeway overpass. He keeps asking himself what would Mannix, Maverick, Frank Cannon or Travis McGee do now which had me rooting for Harvey to succeed in his investigation even after it's terminated by his "client" Parkus. He's obsessed with discovering why Lauren jumped onto freeway traffic and his continuing investigation leads to blackmail and murder
This is an entertaining mystery with a strong, satisfactory twist finish which hopefully, leaves the door open for a sequel. I like Harvey, his new girlfriend Carol and new sense of confidence.
This is an entertaining mystery with a strong, satisfactory twist finish which hopefully, leaves the door open for a sequel. I like Harvey, his new girlfriend Carol and new sense of confidence.
July 6, 2020
The best thing about reading Lee Goldberg is how he manages to inject pure silliness into otherwise un-funny situations, and pulls it off with aplomb. My first forays with the author were reading his Ian Ludlow series, which were hilarious and entertaining. Watch Me Die wasn’t quite as funny, but well done nevertheless and very well paced. So much so, in fact, that the thing is over before you know it, and it left me wishing for more.
Harvey Mapes, the protagonist and narrator, is a perfect Goldberg character: a sad-sack who knows he’s one, but aspires to more. And, given the ironic opportunity, makes good on that aspiration. Along the way, he discovers love, real love, not the fantasy life he’s been indulging while binge-watching private eye TV shows like Mannix and the Rockford Files. He also discovers himself, which goes hand-in-hand with the former discovery. It’s all very satisfying and reminds the reader of Goldberg’s talent.
It would be easy to mistake the writing for zany or slapstick and the plot as too far-fetched. But scratch just a bit beneath the surface and you’ll find a pretty well drawn plot with some interesting twists, a handful of memorable characters, and yeah, some really funny tongue-in-cheek allusions to the whole genre of TV and fiction novels dedicated to the stereotypical PI (which, by the way, Goldberg has penned aplenty for the small screen).
At its core, Watch Me Die is a deceptively well done book, full of entertaining scenes and laughs when you need them. I continue to enjoy this author and hope for a sequel.
Harvey Mapes, the protagonist and narrator, is a perfect Goldberg character: a sad-sack who knows he’s one, but aspires to more. And, given the ironic opportunity, makes good on that aspiration. Along the way, he discovers love, real love, not the fantasy life he’s been indulging while binge-watching private eye TV shows like Mannix and the Rockford Files. He also discovers himself, which goes hand-in-hand with the former discovery. It’s all very satisfying and reminds the reader of Goldberg’s talent.
It would be easy to mistake the writing for zany or slapstick and the plot as too far-fetched. But scratch just a bit beneath the surface and you’ll find a pretty well drawn plot with some interesting twists, a handful of memorable characters, and yeah, some really funny tongue-in-cheek allusions to the whole genre of TV and fiction novels dedicated to the stereotypical PI (which, by the way, Goldberg has penned aplenty for the small screen).
At its core, Watch Me Die is a deceptively well done book, full of entertaining scenes and laughs when you need them. I continue to enjoy this author and hope for a sequel.
November 7, 2014
Surprised
I bought this book on my Kindle, and was in the middle of another book when I started reading it. The language and sex were a little much and sometimes I felt sorry for the lead character. He seemed to be "mentally challenged" and wanted to be a "PI," like mystery books portray, but instead he seemed to be more of a bumbling idiot. This author took this character and literally brought him to adulthood by the end of the book. He is not the same person in the end and I finished the book realizing that we all have our own faults and that it's not always wrong to face them straight on in order to be who we were meant to be; which wrong or right, good or bad, everyone has a point in their lives where decisions must be made and we must all look in the mirror and face the certainty that all actions must result in reactions. A good book. It will leave you wondering what would have happened to you if you had taken "the road less traveled."
I bought this book on my Kindle, and was in the middle of another book when I started reading it. The language and sex were a little much and sometimes I felt sorry for the lead character. He seemed to be "mentally challenged" and wanted to be a "PI," like mystery books portray, but instead he seemed to be more of a bumbling idiot. This author took this character and literally brought him to adulthood by the end of the book. He is not the same person in the end and I finished the book realizing that we all have our own faults and that it's not always wrong to face them straight on in order to be who we were meant to be; which wrong or right, good or bad, everyone has a point in their lives where decisions must be made and we must all look in the mirror and face the certainty that all actions must result in reactions. A good book. It will leave you wondering what would have happened to you if you had taken "the road less traveled."
December 9, 2014
I loved this book. It's got a great premise whereby the "hero," such as he is, seems pretty damn close to a real person — a slovenly, underachieving, regular Joe who almost accidentally turns into a halfway-decent detective by the end. We're not talking about a superhero. We're talking about a guy who drives a beater and who gets beaten up. His transformation is a hell of a lot of fun to watch.
Truth be told, I'd probably give this 92 out of 100. One shortcoming: the ending kind of flops over the finish line. But that's picking at nits: the ending is solid (perhaps I just wanted more, since I was enjoying it so much?), and the writing throughout is often laugh-out-loud funny. More to the point, I recommended "Watch Me Die" to my father — a real connoisseur of detective fiction — and he loved it, too.
Still laughing at some of the lines in this fast little novel. Hats off, Lee Goldberg.
Truth be told, I'd probably give this 92 out of 100. One shortcoming: the ending kind of flops over the finish line. But that's picking at nits: the ending is solid (perhaps I just wanted more, since I was enjoying it so much?), and the writing throughout is often laugh-out-loud funny. More to the point, I recommended "Watch Me Die" to my father — a real connoisseur of detective fiction — and he loved it, too.
Still laughing at some of the lines in this fast little novel. Hats off, Lee Goldberg.
September 13, 2021
Loved 'Watch Me Die' and was hopeful this might have been made into a series. As the book concluded it became clear why it would not. This book flew by - always enjoy Lee Goldberg's books.
Luke Daniels did a terrific job with the narration. His voice is exceptionally dynamic and added much to the excitement.
Luke Daniels did a terrific job with the narration. His voice is exceptionally dynamic and added much to the excitement.
July 18, 2015
I enjoyed the tone of this book more than the plot. The story was well-crafted, and the characters were at least theoretically plausible; but it was the painful vulnerability of the main character that drove the book. Goldberg did an excellent job of making Harvey's Walter Mitty persona lovable. I really enjoyed the frequent reference to some of my favorite fictitious detectives (Joe Mannix, Jim Rockford, Kinsey Milhone, Elvis Cole, and Travis McGee to name a few), whose activities and antics were Harvey's inspiration and guide. The only negative comment I have is that I thought the book could have been a little less crude - uneducated people are not necessarily classless, as Harvey and Carol were written.
December 8, 2022
Goldberg consistently delivers enjoyable, easy reads IMO.
Nothing I'll remember this time next year, but definitely something I'm glad I chose to listen to while I decorated my Christmas tree. Doesn't hurt it being on the Kindle Unlimited catalog and having audio available with it.
The characters in this book are likeable, yet flawed. Reminiscent of USA Network type entertainment. But the story for me was one of intrigue. This book could have been 100 pages longer to really fill out the story line even more, but as is, it sufficed.
Would recommend for someone wanting a quick, light-hearted read.
Nothing I'll remember this time next year, but definitely something I'm glad I chose to listen to while I decorated my Christmas tree. Doesn't hurt it being on the Kindle Unlimited catalog and having audio available with it.
The characters in this book are likeable, yet flawed. Reminiscent of USA Network type entertainment. But the story for me was one of intrigue. This book could have been 100 pages longer to really fill out the story line even more, but as is, it sufficed.
Would recommend for someone wanting a quick, light-hearted read.
July 1, 2017
At first you wonder if the whole thing is a spoof of hardboiled detective
stories, but eventually you realize that you are enjoying the tale and
can't put it down. A gate-guard security guy is hired by a wealthy
resident to follow his wife. The investigation by this rank amateur
takes you places you Would never suspect.
stories, but eventually you realize that you are enjoying the tale and
can't put it down. A gate-guard security guy is hired by a wealthy
resident to follow his wife. The investigation by this rank amateur
takes you places you Would never suspect.
July 3, 2015
Really enjoyed this book.
I never know what is coming when I start reading Lee Goldberg books. With this one laugh out loud so many times, slow moving, it's a sad but good book. Glad Mr Goldberg you are not Harvey Maples. Also narration by Luke Daniels was very good.
I never know what is coming when I start reading Lee Goldberg books. With this one laugh out loud so many times, slow moving, it's a sad but good book. Glad Mr Goldberg you are not Harvey Maples. Also narration by Luke Daniels was very good.
September 10, 2016
This is what I would consider more of a 'mans' novel, but having said that, I thoroughly enjoyed this book! It was quirky and humorous, and made me laugh out loud several times. If you've got a sense of humor and like contemporary books, give it a try!
May 16, 2019
Although one shouldn’t equate others with their most “notorious” work, I find that I have misjudged the authors of television and film adaptations as being limited to those efforts. I did this with Max Allen Collins and I have done this with Lee Goldberg. I should have known better with the latter, especially due to his screenwriting credits on several television series—most conspicuously on my radar, Monk. I didn’t even have to read ten (10) pages in The Man with the Iron-On Badge before I knew that this was, as the Monte Python group used to say, “…something completely different.”
Oh, The Man with the Iron-On Badge still featured Goldberg’s humor and penchant for turning the most ridiculous situation into black comedy, but it also features language that would have sent Adrian Monk looking for a “wipe” for his ears and an obsession for sex that would have left the adolescents in Porky’s looking as abstemious as Bernard of Clairvaux. And it features the most fascinating conceit of an ambitionless rent-a-cop who spends the graveyard shift watching Mannix and The Rockford Files re-runs at his guard shack being thrust into situations where he is uniquely unqualified compared to those television P.I.s who could shrug off bullet-holes, concussions, and near-fatal beatings to solve crimes/mysteries within an hour (minus the commercial insertions) of broadcast entertainment.
The Man with the Iron-On Badge should probably have a wide yellow bad with a bold, black lettered disclaimer reading, “Kids, don’t try this is real-life. Imitation may cause physical pain, emotional duress, biological discomfort, and fatal consequences.” Indeed, Harvey Mapes personally suffers the first three while others seem to be sacrificed in his place for the last. Sorry if that’s a spoiler! No author in her or his right mind would kill off a protagonist this hapless, hilarious, and interesting in the first volume where said character appears. [NOTE: I suppose the screenwriter of The Third Man did this with Harry Lime, subsequently to be resurrected in a serious of radio episodes touted as prequels, but I can’t think of any others off-hand. I can’t imagine Billy Wilder writing prequels to Sunset Boulevard, even if Lord Weber did pull “the boy” out of the pool every night on the musical stage.]
Still, Harvey Mapes pulls off some incredibly lucky stunts, despite his misguided perception that, instead of being like a box of chocolates, life is like a television series. And, Harvey makes some predictable mistakes. In between the lucky stunts and the predictable mistakes is a fascinating mystery with some unexpected twists and turns. I could have done without some of the Tarantino-esque phrasing and the Seth Rogen-esque obsessions, but The Man with the Iron-On Badge was good reading, nonetheless.
Oh, The Man with the Iron-On Badge still featured Goldberg’s humor and penchant for turning the most ridiculous situation into black comedy, but it also features language that would have sent Adrian Monk looking for a “wipe” for his ears and an obsession for sex that would have left the adolescents in Porky’s looking as abstemious as Bernard of Clairvaux. And it features the most fascinating conceit of an ambitionless rent-a-cop who spends the graveyard shift watching Mannix and The Rockford Files re-runs at his guard shack being thrust into situations where he is uniquely unqualified compared to those television P.I.s who could shrug off bullet-holes, concussions, and near-fatal beatings to solve crimes/mysteries within an hour (minus the commercial insertions) of broadcast entertainment.
The Man with the Iron-On Badge should probably have a wide yellow bad with a bold, black lettered disclaimer reading, “Kids, don’t try this is real-life. Imitation may cause physical pain, emotional duress, biological discomfort, and fatal consequences.” Indeed, Harvey Mapes personally suffers the first three while others seem to be sacrificed in his place for the last. Sorry if that’s a spoiler! No author in her or his right mind would kill off a protagonist this hapless, hilarious, and interesting in the first volume where said character appears. [NOTE: I suppose the screenwriter of The Third Man did this with Harry Lime, subsequently to be resurrected in a serious of radio episodes touted as prequels, but I can’t think of any others off-hand. I can’t imagine Billy Wilder writing prequels to Sunset Boulevard, even if Lord Weber did pull “the boy” out of the pool every night on the musical stage.]
Still, Harvey Mapes pulls off some incredibly lucky stunts, despite his misguided perception that, instead of being like a box of chocolates, life is like a television series. And, Harvey makes some predictable mistakes. In between the lucky stunts and the predictable mistakes is a fascinating mystery with some unexpected twists and turns. I could have done without some of the Tarantino-esque phrasing and the Seth Rogen-esque obsessions, but The Man with the Iron-On Badge was good reading, nonetheless.
January 12, 2024
Twisted.
I'm actually a bit sad Lee Goldberg didn't go further with this character. It was quite fun the way he bumbles through the case. Oh well. It's definitely worth the read. I recommend this book to anyone who likes PI stories with humor interspersed. I'm a huge fan of this authors TV writing. This is only the second book I've read. I'm completely sold and will be reading all his books now. This man is the real deal!
I'm actually a bit sad Lee Goldberg didn't go further with this character. It was quite fun the way he bumbles through the case. Oh well. It's definitely worth the read. I recommend this book to anyone who likes PI stories with humor interspersed. I'm a huge fan of this authors TV writing. This is only the second book I've read. I'm completely sold and will be reading all his books now. This man is the real deal!
September 2, 2023
Harvey Mapes is the night security guard at a gated community. He's also a huge fan of both private eye novels and TV shows. So when a resident of the community pays him to follow the resident's wife,Harvey sees his private eye fantasy coming true.
But when people start dying, Harvey begins to realize that real-life does not lead to TV endings where everything is wrapped up cleanly and the bad guys go to jail.
I had a hard time liking Harvey for the first few chapters, but the mystery he's dropped into is a good one. And, as he began to realize that fulfilling his private detective fantasy gave him something useful to do with his life, he grew on me as a character. He doesn't do half-bad in following clues, though he gets beaten up at one point and gradually realizes that he's not going to get his clearn TV ending.
It's a fast-paced, well-written mystery that counterpoints fictional P.I.'s with real-life, endowing the book with a cynical atmosphere. The story strikes a nice balance between Harvey's lack of experience/skill and his being smart enough to gradually unlock the mystery. Though I did need a few chapters to get to like Harvey, I ended up enjoying the book enormously.
But when people start dying, Harvey begins to realize that real-life does not lead to TV endings where everything is wrapped up cleanly and the bad guys go to jail.
I had a hard time liking Harvey for the first few chapters, but the mystery he's dropped into is a good one. And, as he began to realize that fulfilling his private detective fantasy gave him something useful to do with his life, he grew on me as a character. He doesn't do half-bad in following clues, though he gets beaten up at one point and gradually realizes that he's not going to get his clearn TV ending.
It's a fast-paced, well-written mystery that counterpoints fictional P.I.'s with real-life, endowing the book with a cynical atmosphere. The story strikes a nice balance between Harvey's lack of experience/skill and his being smart enough to gradually unlock the mystery. Though I did need a few chapters to get to like Harvey, I ended up enjoying the book enormously.
December 31, 2023
Great fun. Well plotted, believable characters and written with humor. I will read more by this author.
November 17, 2023
Another winner for Lee
Watch Me Die is the story of a security guard who accepts a private job to do some detective work for one of the residents of the community. Its also the story about one man's quest to realize his dream, and how the chance experience changes him for the better. The plot is good, the characters roles mesh together well and the end is a surprise you wouldn't see coming. If you are a fan of the 60's and 70's tv detective stories, you'll be taken back as the new detective hero tries his best to solve the case along the same lines as Rockford, Mannix, or Cannon. In the end, he is, well, you will just have to read the book to find out...
Watch Me Die is the story of a security guard who accepts a private job to do some detective work for one of the residents of the community. Its also the story about one man's quest to realize his dream, and how the chance experience changes him for the better. The plot is good, the characters roles mesh together well and the end is a surprise you wouldn't see coming. If you are a fan of the 60's and 70's tv detective stories, you'll be taken back as the new detective hero tries his best to solve the case along the same lines as Rockford, Mannix, or Cannon. In the end, he is, well, you will just have to read the book to find out...
Read
August 13, 2016The humor, the mystery, the pure storytelling was spot on. It's been a long time since I chuckled during a book, and tried to read faster to fathom how the story would end. Wonderful job with a PI that's stupid enough to be funny and smart enough to be efficient. Fun reading. I have found a new author to binge on now.
December 3, 2023
This author constantly surprises me. This story is a mystery but I different kind of mystery. It has humor but dark humor. It has a cast of characters that are twisted in their thinking but so interesting that you cannot stop reading. There are so many twists and turns to this mystery it will make your head spin. It I loved and enjoyed it all.
January 28, 2013
Watch Me Die is a mystery novel that draws you in. The story has plenty of twists and turns and the writer's droll and witty voice entertains throughout.
Want to read
February 25, 2019Synopsis: Harvey is a security guard; he's asked to follow a wealthy resident's wife. He stumbles and fumbles but uncovers something serious.
April 2, 2023
I enjoyed this book. It was a good balance of humor with crime solving. The little romance was a sweet surprise. It also had some unexpected twists and turns that I appreciated.
October 12, 2023
Fun and slightly raunchy detective story. I definitely did not figure out who-dun-it. I enjoyed the character as much as the plot. You can definitely tell the author is a screen-writer.
November 27, 2021
Goldberg has written around eighty novels (some in collaboration with other writers), plus half a dozen how-to books on writing for television -- not to mention writing and often producing well over a hundred episodes of various TV series, mostly in the cops-and-robbers genre. But you have to start someplace and this was his first published piece of original fiction. It got nominated for several awards and it’s surprisingly good for a debut work.
The protagonist is Harvey Mapes, a nice guy, now in his late twenties, who has been working for some years as night-shift private security in an upscale gated community in Los Angeles. Basically, he spends every night sitting in a very small stucco building, opening and closing the gate for people and writing down license numbers. He knows all the maids (who come to work early) and everyone knows him. And that’s fine because he spends most of his time reading detective novels and dreaming of somehow becoming a PI himself. And then he goes across the street to Denny’s for a big breakfast and goes home to sleep most of the day away until his next shift.
And then one evening Cyril Parkus, a resident who is big in international movie marketing, comes to Harvey with a proposition. Something is up with his wife, Lauren, and he wants Harvey to tail her for a while and figure out what it is. Harvey has had a crush on Lauren for some time, so he’s willing -- plus, you know, DETECTIVE WORK! And he knows exactly how to do it, thanks to Travis McGee and Spenser and Dirty Harry. (“Dirty Harvey”! Yes!) So he follows her all around Greater LA, making notes and concocting theories in his head about what she’s up to. And then, after a violent run-in with a very unpleasant character whom he’s sure is blackmailing his target, Harvey watches in horror as Lauren takes a dive off an overpass into high-speed freeway traffic. And she knew he was there, watching. (Hence the title.)
Suddenly, it’s a who different case, not just an exciting and adventurous game for Harvey. Now he has to really concentrate on finding out what happened and why, and it’s going to take him much farther afield, and Cyril will be closely involved, and so will the violent stranger. And Harvey will have some hard decisions to make.
It’s clear that the author was a big fan of Donald Westlake when he was starting out, which is not a bad thing. There’s the same mix of off-the-wall humor and serious plot twists, and the same growth in the main character by the time you get to the end. A great number of Goldberg’s books are available as Kindle Unlimited at Amazon, by the way, including his most recent series featuring Eve Ronin.
The protagonist is Harvey Mapes, a nice guy, now in his late twenties, who has been working for some years as night-shift private security in an upscale gated community in Los Angeles. Basically, he spends every night sitting in a very small stucco building, opening and closing the gate for people and writing down license numbers. He knows all the maids (who come to work early) and everyone knows him. And that’s fine because he spends most of his time reading detective novels and dreaming of somehow becoming a PI himself. And then he goes across the street to Denny’s for a big breakfast and goes home to sleep most of the day away until his next shift.
And then one evening Cyril Parkus, a resident who is big in international movie marketing, comes to Harvey with a proposition. Something is up with his wife, Lauren, and he wants Harvey to tail her for a while and figure out what it is. Harvey has had a crush on Lauren for some time, so he’s willing -- plus, you know, DETECTIVE WORK! And he knows exactly how to do it, thanks to Travis McGee and Spenser and Dirty Harry. (“Dirty Harvey”! Yes!) So he follows her all around Greater LA, making notes and concocting theories in his head about what she’s up to. And then, after a violent run-in with a very unpleasant character whom he’s sure is blackmailing his target, Harvey watches in horror as Lauren takes a dive off an overpass into high-speed freeway traffic. And she knew he was there, watching. (Hence the title.)
Suddenly, it’s a who different case, not just an exciting and adventurous game for Harvey. Now he has to really concentrate on finding out what happened and why, and it’s going to take him much farther afield, and Cyril will be closely involved, and so will the violent stranger. And Harvey will have some hard decisions to make.
It’s clear that the author was a big fan of Donald Westlake when he was starting out, which is not a bad thing. There’s the same mix of off-the-wall humor and serious plot twists, and the same growth in the main character by the time you get to the end. A great number of Goldberg’s books are available as Kindle Unlimited at Amazon, by the way, including his most recent series featuring Eve Ronin.
March 3, 2020
I downloaded this several months ago with Kindle Unlimited and then it sat on my device. A few days ago I saw another author’s recommendation of this title and decided to give it a try. I really enjoyed the story, humor, and references to old TV and book detectives. Harvey, the 29 year old protagonist, sits in a guard shack at a gated community for the late night shift and mostly reads detective stories. And then, when a resident hires him to follow his wife, Harvey gets caught up in blackmail, murder and a mystery he can’t let go of. It is told from Harvey’s point of view and and it kept me laughing at his attempts at the wry, witty language of the stereotypical PI’s of TV and novels. The plot does take a dark turn and is a true mystery, but Harvey’s humorous analysis of his new life continues even when faced with the reality of the dangers he encounters.
I actually listened to a lot of the book on my Echo device since there was a really good audio narration available to me which I think made me enjoy the book even more since I felt like Harvey was actually telling me his story.
I actually listened to a lot of the book on my Echo device since there was a really good audio narration available to me which I think made me enjoy the book even more since I felt like Harvey was actually telling me his story.
August 31, 2018
PI Wannabe
Working as a security guard for a gated community, Harvey Mabes is stuck in a nowhere job until a homeowner gets his PI juices flowing by offering him a job. Harvey is asked to follow the wife to determine where she goes during the day while the husband is at work., since he has noticed a change in behavior. Told in first person narrative, the reader gains insight to Harvey's romantic conception of what makes a PI tick that he has deduced from various murder mysteries and old TV detective shows. He concluded that detective work doesn't always follow a pattern for bad things happen and people really die. He follows the case, even when he is no longer retained by the client and as events unfold, he wonders if this is his true calling. Amusing character, even when faced with dire situations. Fun read.
Working as a security guard for a gated community, Harvey Mabes is stuck in a nowhere job until a homeowner gets his PI juices flowing by offering him a job. Harvey is asked to follow the wife to determine where she goes during the day while the husband is at work., since he has noticed a change in behavior. Told in first person narrative, the reader gains insight to Harvey's romantic conception of what makes a PI tick that he has deduced from various murder mysteries and old TV detective shows. He concluded that detective work doesn't always follow a pattern for bad things happen and people really die. He follows the case, even when he is no longer retained by the client and as events unfold, he wonders if this is his true calling. Amusing character, even when faced with dire situations. Fun read.
January 25, 2021
When I read the first paragraph of this book, I knew it was going to be different than the other books I've read by the author:
This book loves making fun of detective books and TV shows - not just the misogyny, overly broad strokes, toxic masculinity, etc., but also the improbable endings that tie everything up in a clean bow. This book is the reverse - the protagonist, Harvey Mapes, often gets beaten up, he learns to relate to women as people, and the characters around him are drawn as more than caricatures.
By then end of the book, Harvey reconciles his idealized perception of what he thinks a detective should be with his real world experience.
The last sentence of the book:
I don’t know if you’ve ever read John D. MacDonald’s Travis McGee books before. McGee is sort of a private eye who lives in Florida on a houseboat he won in a poker game. While solving mysteries, he helps a lot of ladies in distress. The way he helps them is by fucking their brains out and letting them cook his meals, do his laundry, and scrub the deck of his boat for a few weeks. These women, McGee calls them “wounded birds,” are always very grateful that he does this for them. To me, that’s a perfect world.
This book loves making fun of detective books and TV shows - not just the misogyny, overly broad strokes, toxic masculinity, etc., but also the improbable endings that tie everything up in a clean bow. This book is the reverse - the protagonist, Harvey Mapes, often gets beaten up, he learns to relate to women as people, and the characters around him are drawn as more than caricatures.
By then end of the book, Harvey reconciles his idealized perception of what he thinks a detective should be with his real world experience.
The last sentence of the book:
As I drove back towards LA, I threw my Travis McGee books out the window. The guy didn’t know shit about being a private eye.
April 15, 2020
Do not read. Even if free via Kindle Unlimited.
Seriously,
Accidentally downloaded this one, meant to select one of the author’s good works. (Ian Ludlow). But it had a free audible and I was on a long drive, so I figured what the heck, let’s see where this is going.
Seriously the main character couldn’t be more cringe worthy, he’s basically an incell. (Though he does occasionally bang his unattractive neighbor. He considers her a bro, so the incell comparison stands.)
On top of that he’s a looser, and truthfully the point of reading isn’t to read about a person whose life is shittier than yours. It’s to escape.
Lee Goldberg has talent as an author. This story just isn’t one worth reading.
Seriously,
Accidentally downloaded this one, meant to select one of the author’s good works. (Ian Ludlow). But it had a free audible and I was on a long drive, so I figured what the heck, let’s see where this is going.
Seriously the main character couldn’t be more cringe worthy, he’s basically an incell. (Though he does occasionally bang his unattractive neighbor. He considers her a bro, so the incell comparison stands.)
On top of that he’s a looser, and truthfully the point of reading isn’t to read about a person whose life is shittier than yours. It’s to escape.
Lee Goldberg has talent as an author. This story just isn’t one worth reading.
July 25, 2023
This is a fun quick read.
If you are familiar with book and TV detectives and private investigators, this will dredge up a lot of memories. Everything Harvey Mapes knows he read in a murder mystery book or watched on tv. This leads to some truths and some falsities. He is a security guard hired to follow a resident's wife to see what she does all day. What he discovers is that she is apparently being blackmailed - until he witnesses her suicide. The job he was hired for is done, but he knows any decent investigator does not stop until the guilty are punished.
Lee has a wonderful sense of humor, and this character could be a classic.
There is graphic language, but if that is not a problem, you will enjoy this tale.
I borrowed a copy from the public library.
If you are familiar with book and TV detectives and private investigators, this will dredge up a lot of memories. Everything Harvey Mapes knows he read in a murder mystery book or watched on tv. This leads to some truths and some falsities. He is a security guard hired to follow a resident's wife to see what she does all day. What he discovers is that she is apparently being blackmailed - until he witnesses her suicide. The job he was hired for is done, but he knows any decent investigator does not stop until the guilty are punished.
Lee has a wonderful sense of humor, and this character could be a classic.
There is graphic language, but if that is not a problem, you will enjoy this tale.
I borrowed a copy from the public library.
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