Impossible Bargain

by Patricia Wilson

"I want you to be my fiancee."

Julian Forrest's words were businesslike, but Merissa's first instinct was to run from the threatening brilliance of the raw male look of the man.

Yet she agreed to his madcap scheme to pose as his bride-to-be, ostensibly to dispatch unwanted females from his busy life. After all, Merissa's modeling work barely provided for an ailing mother and a father's debts, and the fee Julian offered was exorbitant.

She could do it, Merissa determined. She'd survive the necessary close contact with this unpredictable man--and hopefully the whole ridiculous affair--with her heart and her mind still her own!

Genres: Harlequin, Romance, Harlequin Presents, Contemporary, Hqn

187 pages, Paperback

First published December 1, 1987

About the author

Patricia Wilson (1929 – 2010) was a best-selling writer of 53 romance novels for the Mills & Boon publisher from 1986 to 2004. She placed her novels primarily in England, Spain or France.

Reviews

[Vintage · Rating 2 out of 5]

I feel like I either read a different book than my GR friends, or my ability to read between the lines verges on remedial reading.

The poor heroine is saddled with both an impossible bargain as well as an impossible hero. He sees her just sitting at a restaurant and his eagle eyes identify and peg her as a soulless, slutty vixen. Okay, there is a little more to it than that, but poor little virgin can't catch a break with the accusations of slutty behavior. He immediately apologizes then does it all over again. And again. Then one more time for good measure. The accusations and insults are either accompanied with amused and knowing smiles or glowering frowny faces.

Poor heroine is actually a beautiful but downtrodden model paying off debts her father was accused of incurring or something like that.

Do I believe the hero is obsessed loves the heroine? Yes, I am just very afraid there may be a murder/suicide in their future.

[boogenhagen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Re Impossible Bargain - PW is back with another sweet but feisty h and an H who really wants to be the typical Alpha bully HP H - but is really just a marshmallow and hopelessly in love with the h to the point of obsession.

The story starts with the h in restaurant with an older family male friend. The OMF was her father's accountant for his highly successful chemical company, but something went badly wrong. When the h's father died in an accident, lots of money was missing from the company coffers and her father was blamed. The h and her mum lost everything and the mum developed severe asthma. The h works doing modeling jobs whenever she can, she and her mum are determined to pay the creditor's off, tho they truly believe the father was innocent.

The OMF wanders off to have chat and the h is subject to some nasty eyeballing by the H. Since the h appears very worldly and sophisticated in her model persona, the H seems to be very contemptuously staring at her from across the room. On the way out, he makes a nasty comment that insinuates that the h is a high priced lady of the night gold digger. The h is outraged. She is further outraged when the H manipulates things and kidnaps her to convince her to be his fake fiance. Ostensibly because he has all these women chasing after him and he needs the breather. He offers the h £15000 if she will engage in a farce of an engagement for several weeks.

The h is VERY reluctant to do so, she is essentially an honest person, but the father left debts in excess of £200,000 and her mum needs a better home to live in that doesn't inflame her asthma, so the h agrees. This is the H's cue to make lots of nasty insults and insinuations which the h parries with barely a thought.

Tho it is obvious the H thinks she is a major money grabbing tart, that doesn't stop him from trying to get the h to succumb to the lurve club mojo. There is also a wanna be OW who makes really nasty remarks and tries to bully the h. But the h smacks her down hard when she insists that since the H was such a devoted student of the h's dad, she and the H knew each other for years and have been in love forever - she then convinces the OW that she and the H are rockin' to keep the bedposts knockin' and she is up the duff from all the activity. This last bit is the final salvo in the OW's attack and she runs off with her ego scorched, never to be heard from again.

The H is happy the OW is gone but he is still trying it on with the h. Naturally the h is having none of that, and there is lots of snarky banter between the two while the H goes about getting the h a high fashion modeling career and moving her mum to a better cottage while the h is categorically turning the lurve club definitively down. The h grows increasingly upset as the H's lies spread to more and more people, especially her beloved mum who thinks all their problems are solved.

Then there is a visit to his parent's house for the weekend and everyone is very pleased and excited to meet the H's fiancee, except supposedly the girl whose attentions the H is using the h to ward off. The h knows something is off about the whole thing, but she is so distressed over the lies, she can't make sense of the overheard conversation between them until much later. (It turns out the girl is actually the H's brother's fiancee and she fudged that truth to help the H corner the h.)

Eventually the h has enough and announces that she is done with the whole thing and gets ready to walk out. The H manages to get her alone at his home and the lurve club mojo takes over. The next day the h finds out that the H went over to her mother's and found her father's secret tapes. The OMF shows up highly agitated too, and the h puts him off.

When the H returns there is a big confrontation when the h accuses him of stealing her father's chemical secrets and using them for his own gain. The H makes the h listen to the tape and we find out that the Older Male Friend was the real embezzler of the h's father's company funds. He was also paid as a spy to force the father to go back to his old position and abandon his new company. The H knew the stories about his old mentor weren't true and he set out to clear his name and now he can. Only he really thought the h was a tart and decided she wasn't worthy of being her father's daughter and he thought he had to reform her and now he feels very ashamed because she was completely chaste and she had to develop a harder shell to earn a living as a model and pay off her father's debts, which was why she was so concerned about money.

The H has to do a big grovel cause he loves her and now she is really upset and leaving him. The h kinda steals the scene tho when she has a little crying ranty moment saying

''You're terrible!' she wept, tears streaming down her face. 'You've tricked me and lied to
me, bullied me and hurt me, and I'd like to punish you really hard, but I love you too much!'

and falls right into the H's arms for the big HEA. It was a very affecting moment.

So the H and h are happily planning wedded bliss, right after the H's brother beats him up for using his fiancee to fool the h and all is right in HPlandia once again.

This one was cute and I liked the banter between the two. The h was about as tough as sending a kitten in a foam helmet into Battle Toads, but she was pretty adorable, so I did not mind too much. Her send off of the OW was fantastic and the H was pretty cute in his desperation to keep the h. All in all, this is a pretty good time in HPlandia and worth a look at.

[Verity · Rating 4 out of 5]

Anotha endearing, ultra jealous possessive hero who makes up an elaborate plan to blackmail heroine into a fake engagement. His dubious reason to beat away his circle of hormonal skanks turns out to be a camouflage. He used to be mentored by heroine's dad. Heroine is a model who lives paystubs to paystubs to pay off expired, much-maligned dad's debts & support asthmatic mum. Hero initially thinks she's a selfish, money-pawing beyotch who'll frantically jump @ the dangled cash like King Kong jumping into Atlantic ocean @ the sight of bobbing ripe bananas. There's a mystery involving who framed heroine's dad & she suspects hero has an ulterior motive pertaining to dad's secret tapes. Hero is a persistent, domineering alpha but deep down is a sweet pudding who's cwazy 4 spunky heroine & he charms the lights outta heroine's mum, installing her in his cottage, buying heroine bridal gown, clothes, a new car. Loaded Hero goes apeshit whenevah heroine's platonic friend so much as blinks @ her. A mid-sized conflict @ the end adds more tension. A romantic, bubbly Bickerville from start to finish. It's a bit dated cuz heroine's mum reacts like it's a taboo when hero drops the bombshell on her that he's installing heroine in his domain, but he reassures her there's a chaperone. Are we still in Victorian ages ? It also has some Pretty Woman / Cinderella flavah when hero insists on choosing heroine's wardrobe during a shopping spree & all he gotta do is whip out his mighty wallet to fed-ex the delivery. Then the alleged stalkerific OW shakes things up but no worries, hero of course knew heroine has a natural backbone & she gives OW a big whopper that there's a bun in her toaster. Ha ! Take that, bitch ! I Lurved the spirited heroine. She always has a brittle shell & it drives hero bonkers. She really makes him sweat. He wants to turn their fake engagement into a real thang, but heroine slaps the bargain in his face that she's just in it 4 his obscene green dough & when mission's accomplished, she's outtie ! Heroine refuses to settle for less than twu wuv. When his hymen plunger scores, he realizes she's not as shady / whore-y as he thought. HEA prevails when hero proves that he's been busting his balls the last couple of years to find the culprit who had backstabbed heroine's dad. We can see the glimmer of hope from a mile away that these 2 luvbirds belong together. I lurve PW's heroes, they're insanely jealous but don't go overboard. Julian is such a sweetie, the things that roll off his tongue made me wanna hug him, even if he acts like an ass to Merissa when provoked into temper.

[StMargarets · Rating 3 out of 5]

Aw, this one was cute and the hero was the very definition of not knowing whether he was coming or going. His Machiavellian plan to clear his former professor's name and reform the heroine had so many ridiculous layers and deceits that it got a bit muddled in the middle - for him, for the heroine, and for the reader.

What saved the story was how obvious the hero was in his obsession with the heroine. He was smitten from the beginning and I'm sure that trip on the catwalk which she turned into a graceful cartwheel was the deciding factor in winning his heart forever. It helped me put up with her bickering later on in the story.

[Romance_reader · Rating 4 out of 5]

The H started out as a bulldozer (he was literally trying to bulldoze the h into every little thing) and quickly turned into one of the most besotted, crazy in love heroes I've ever come across in an HP. h was likeable as well and had some endearing quirks - like allergy to almonds (which can of course be horrifying irl) and knowing how to cartwheel (literally) out of a tricky situation. Her only failing, as with all other HP heroines, was being obtuse when it came to understanding the H's feelings for her. Probably more so, because here was a hero who was literally begging the h to be with him and in his life at every given opportunity. Besides the three little words, I think he'd expressed in every way possible what he felt for her. But this being HPland, true love is rarely experienced without some great melodrama first and it took a while for the h to catch on that the H meant what he said. The HEA though, when it does arrive, is very satisfactory. Definitely qualifies as a 4 star read.

[Margo · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a solid effort. The H was an unbearable control freak whose logic plummeted due to thwarted lust, but he will be a doting, protective husband who'll do everything to make sure she is protected and cherished.

[Naksed · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was a good page-turner but in the end, the hero engaged in such a monumental, unnecessary deceit that he just didn't sit well with me.

I am not going to go through the minutiae of his scheme but suffice it to say he was trying to clear the name of heroine's father, who had been set up in a horrendous financial scandal, and at the same time, he was falling for heroine, so he came up with a ridiculous, only in HPlandia, fake fiancee scheme to achieve his ends. While doing that, he managed to really hurt an already downtrodden heroine who was bearing the cross for all that her father had been accused of doing and keeping her head high while doing it. His constant taunts about her selfishness, promiscuity, etc. were too much.

The heroine was pretty spunky but she could also be incredibly dense and way too putty in hero's arms. The one scene where she has her hair lacquered into a Lady Liberty style crown of spikes and does cartwheels on a catwalk, flashing her undies at her audience, was pretty much worth reading the entire book for. Simply hilarious.

I predict a HEA for them as long as she has no male friends and does exactly as he says lol.

[*CJ* · Rating 2 out of 5]

"Impossible Bargain" is the story of Merissa and Julien.

It was weird.

Basically, our H spots the h in a fashion show, immediately presumes her to be a slut, relentlessly chases and blackmails her to be his pretend fiance, taunts her about her past and "experience", takes over her life, vows to change her behavior, soon reveals a nefarious past and hidden motives.

He was very controlling and judgemental, and the h tried to unsucessfully fight him throughout the book, soon giving into his manipulations and blackmail. Yes, he was smitten with her, but he was SO annoying at times. Heroine was hot and cold as well, and did her best to exasperate him. They were both cuckoo cases, and were imperfectly made for one another.

Meh.

Safe
2/5

[Dianna · Rating 3 out of 5]

Merissa is a typical late 80s model heroine. She considers most fashion to be incredibly sleazy, and approaches jobs and co-workers with prickly bitchiness. Underneath it all she’s a sweet, kind girl, nobly bearing up against the injustices of the world.

Merissa’s injustices can be traced to her father’s death, about four years ago. He left her and her mother in debt and while it’s all vague at the beginning, his reputation was in tatters when he died, and by extension Merissa and her mother are socially damaged goods.

Her mother has shut down. She’s contributing hand-wringing and a Lanister-like determination to pay the family’s debts, but not much else. She has asthma, is in her early 40s, but apparently decrepit. I had very little time for her.

Into this mix drops Julian Forest the thuggishly sexy architect. He completely disapproves of Merissa, who is clearly a fancy sexpot with loose morals and a selfish obsession with getting paid. He pushes all of Merissa’s guilt buttons: her mixed feelings about the morality of her job, how tacky it is to be paid for work (what?), and how she isn’t taking good enough care of her decrepit mother. When his initial ‘hey, how about a screw?’ pick up doesn’t work, he resorts to crazy plans. Eventually, he settles on the fake fiancée plan. He needs a hard-nosed quick thinking bitch to fool all the women in his life into believing that he’s taken.

‘No thanks, you suck,’ is Merissa’s initial response. Actually, her initial response was to tremble with fear and arousal when she first saw him looking at her. I’m going to generously interpret the fear as a presentiment of change, rather than a fear of physical harm. Nobody copes well with change, even if that change is attractive wealthy, and crazy about you. There’s always a downside.

Julian manages to brow-beat Merissa into pretending to be his bride-to-be, although she finds the whole thing morally repugnant. He has thrown in the sweetener of a country cottage complete with housekeeper-companion for her mother, although he spoils it by telling Merissa off for not taking better care of her frail and aged parent. Julian also quickly works out that Merissa isn’t a hard-nosed quick thinking bitch, but that’s ok: he’s still desperate about getting her into bed.

I really disapprove of putting asthmatic women in their early 40s out to pasture. ‘Rest easy, old mother!’ Julian basically tells Merissa’s mummy. ‘All your troubles are at an end!’ Julian is 36, and so is about 6 – 8 years younger than Merissa’s mummy and I find his whole attitude deeply suspicious. He’s 13 years older than Merissa, and it’s difficult not to see everything he does as tactical. The cottage is on the opposite end of London from Julian’s house, so he’s made a very good move to keep Merissa and her mother apart.

While she gets a life of comfort and security, this woman is not going to get any more sex for the rest of her life. Her one shot at occasional coitus will be from some retired Naval officer in his 70s with an eccentric shed-based hobby. She’ll have to hurry up and find him though, because by the time she hits 45 she’ll have scads more competition from younger decrepit widows. I’m not sure whether she’s quite realised that her lack of agency hasn’t landed her in a healthy environment in which she can emerge as an independent person. Plus: while a cottage outside London is possibly healthier than a flat in London, if they were serious about this asthma deal they’d ship her off to a warm coastal climate. I live in the asthma capital of Australia and therefore consider myself (incorrectly) totally expert in these matters.

Julian’s parents, who are way, way older than Merissa’s mummy, get to be treated younger. It’s unfair. What Merissa’s mummy really needs is some professional support to remind her that her life is not over, and being fretful about her daughter’s career while commanding all its benefits was not correct behaviour. A more active approach to widowhood, and ownership of her own medical care will give her a far better quality of life.

I also think neither of them understand income tax. Merissa gets paid cash-in-hand, so I think she’s dodging tax entirely, and shame on her. I’m sure Julian will come to the rescue if she’s ever audited, but still. My morality is firmly on the side of ‘fashion is fine, not paying your taxes is bad,’ so I’m not impressed by Merissa’s heroics.

Argh, and the worst thing is that early on Merissa gets a promotion modelling job at a nightclub Julian has built. This is after they’ve encountered each other but before they’ve exchanged names. Julian has insisted on doing this extravagant promotion and has hired ten models. Merissa is stroppy about wearing a short dress, lots of makeup, and having her hair done in spikes. Her agent had warned her that there would be choreography but somehow Merissa, who is front and centre girl because she’s short and too curvy to be a runway model, doesn’t learn it. Instead, she relies on her ‘natural dance ability’ and her anger to dance and prance about, and this is ridiculous. It’s even more ridiculous that Julian is cutting about the promotion and tells Merissa she looked like a witch. Buddy, you or someone associated with this nightclub business PAID 5,000 pounds for the models (plus whatever commission) and must also have paid a PR company to come up with whatever concept was behind it, and now you’re stroppy about the hairstyle? I find you to be idiotic.

This wouldn’t be a Wilson romance without the heroine suffering some injury or illness so that the hero can rescue and cuddle her. There’s also out of proportion jealousy and characters saying pretty crazy and occasionally amusing things to each other. It’s exasperating how quickly Merissa transforms into a helpless kitten who must check in with Julian before going about her own damn business. It also rubbed me up the wrong way the number of times Julian told Merissa that she was weird or odd. It all had this tone of keeping the heroine in the dark, making her dependent on the hero for approval, and punishing her when she strays from a script she barely understands.

However, the punishment is mild. Julian turned out to be a pretty good cuddler, and Merissa gets in a few funny lines. This isn’t one of Wilson’s better efforts, but it’s still fairly entertaining.

[Chantal ❤️ · Rating 5 out of 5]

She was a model with a brain and he was scared to fall for her because he thought she was mercenary. It was a great story. Too bad I could make out the villain a mile away! Great read and recommend highly.

[JillyB · Rating 4 out of 5]

This story definitely keeps one engaged. Verity does a very funny review of this book.

I liked .....

The Banter between the h and H
That The h has a backbone
That The H became bat shit crazy over our heroine
The families on both sides, they were loving and good
The ow and any other beotches as they were no competition for our feisty h when she gets her ire up...
The angst...

I did guess parts of the underlying subplot fairly quickly , but it had me questioning some of my theories at certain points and I didn’t have everything worked out

I enjoyed the ending, these two are very cute together

[DamsonDreamer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bit of a curate's egg ie good in parts. Rather nice H with some good knee trembling lines. Always makes me laugh when the h's mother is treated like a veritable creaking invalid and then described as early 40s. People aged a lot quicker a generation or two ago. Anyway, definitely readable. Where do I find someone to set my mother up with a large cottage outside London, complete with Housekeeper on the strength of one night out.

[Ellyn (Mrs. Darcy in my Dreams) · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️ The h was a little slow on the uptake to not figure out what the H was up to throughout the book 🤦‍♀️. It was fun to read a vintage "fake" engagement since it is so prevalent in more modern romances. I like this author and will read more by her!

[Roub · Rating 1 out of 5]

i did not like it. Merissa was too prickly for my tastes and their constant bickering gave me a headache ! what woman wud not like to be swept off her feet like she was !? she had also found a cottage for her mother and a way to clear all her debts all thanks to Julian. yet she was always complaining about this and dat! ungrateful bitch !

[Kace | The Booknerd · Rating 2 out of 5]

The hero was the biggest jerk among Patricia Wilson's heroes. And the heroine had no spine and couldn't stand up for herself. But usual, the angsty-ness and verbal sparring were great so I still enjoyed it.

[Last Chance Saloon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dull model heroine (23) catches the eye of architect man about town hero (36), who was once a student of her dead father.
It’s harmless and forgettable.
No real OW and no OM.

[Chrisolu · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25 stars. A jealous hero who nearly came to blows with another man. I stan.

[RomLibrary · Rating 3 out of 5]

I want you to be my fiancee."

Julian Forrest's words were businesslike, but Merissa's first instinct was to run from the threatening brilliance of the raw male look of the man.

Yet she agreed to his madcap scheme to pose as his bride-to-be, ostensibly to dispatch unwanted females from his busy life. After all, Merissa's modeling work barely provided for an ailing mother and a father's debts, and the fee Julian offered was exorbitant.

She could do it, Merissa determined. She'd survive the necessary close contact with this unpredictable man--and hopefully the whole ridiculous affair--with her heart and her mind still her own!

[100sweet · Rating 2 out of 5]

The h was so mean for most of the story while the H just kept insulting her. Towards the end they quickly resolved their issues and boom HEA.

[Debby · Rating 5 out of 5]

The man is like a dream. He is rich, handsome, strong, loving, caring and his kisses are the best.

He forces the woman to pretend she is his fiancée.

He then gives her 15.000 pounds, he gives her mother a house of her own, he gives her a car because he worries about her safety, he gives her fancy clothes. He says he would like to make the fake engagement a real engagement. He says he can’t live without her. He is jealous of all the other men she looks at. He is worried about her health. He helps her get through an allergie attack. He tells her he wants her to stay. Towards the end he even tells her he loves her. What more can a man do to show his feelings?

Yet this woman thinks he doesn’t love her. The women in the Harlequin books are so stupid.

I enjoyed this book very much. Who doesn’t want a man like that. He is so crazy about the woman that it makes you melt. Highly recommend this book.

[Myrna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I've expected it to be a solid 4-star book, but it goes downhill closer to the end. Too much drama!

A beautiful model is bent on clearing her late father's name, paying off his debts and taking care of her mother's health, when she's blackmailed into a pretend engagement by her father's former student.

It appears her fiancé has too many reasons to pursue her.

[Bea Tea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fake fiancee story with added layers of deceit, a sweet innocent h and a broody controlling H. Basically all the things I love 😍

[Misnoawl · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.6***

[April Brookshire · Rating 3 out of 5]

Patricia Wilson is one of my favorite HP authors. Her dialogue is never dull like in some other HPs and the interaction between characters feels more real.

This story was entertaining and the hero was the typical Harlequin jackass. The heroine didn't put up with him and mouthed off to him when he deserved it.

[Annick · Rating 5 out of 5]

This i a great book and is also on of the best I have ever read by Patricia Wilson.The characters dilema was rather exciting and well thought of.Plus would have been great if it was put into a movie,but all in all great book to read.

[Diana · Rating 4 out of 5]

This story touched me a couple of times. Very realistic and moving, truly warm story. One of the few I would love to see made into a tv movie. Strong characters and a juicy story.

[More Books Than Time · Rating 3 out of 5]

Too many mixups and faulty assumptions. Read half then skimmed the rest.
Started again in 3 months and this time finished it. Pretty good.

5 years later, melodrama.