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That's Revolting!: Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation
As the growing gay mainstream prioritizes the attainment of straight privilege over all else, it drains queer identity of any meaning, relevance, or cultural value. What's more, queers remain under Gay youth shelters can be vetoed because they might reduce property values. Trannies are out because they might offend straights. That's Revolting! offers a bracing tonic to these trends. Edited by Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore, That's Revolting! collects timely essays such as "Dr. Laura, Sit on My Face," "Gay Art Guerrillas," and "Queer An Oxymoron Or Just Plain Moronic?" by unrepentant activists like Patrick Califia, Kate Bornstein, and Carol Queen. This updated edition contains seven new selections that cover everything from rural, working-class youth in Massachusetts to gay life in New Orleans to the infamous Drop the Debt/Stop AIDS action in New York. This lively composite portrait of cutting-edge queer activism is a clarion call for anyone who questions the value of becoming the Stepford Homosexual.
360 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 1, 2004
62 people are currently reading
4149 people want to read
About the author
Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore
21 books446 followersMattilda Bernstein Sycamore is the award-winning author of The Freezer Door, a New York Times Editors’ Choice, one of Oprah Magazine’s Best LGBTQ Books of 2020, and a finalist for the PEN/Jean Stein Book Award. Winner of a Lambda Literary Award and an American Library Association Stonewall Honor Book, she’s the author of three novels and three nonfiction titles, and the editor of six nonfiction anthologies, most recently Between Certain Death and a Possible Future: Queer Writing on Growing Up with the AIDS Crisis. Sycamore lives in Seattle, and her new book, Touching the Art, will be released on November 7, 2023.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 73 reviews
October 28, 2014
Necessary but prone to lifestylism. "Resisting assimilation" has to mean more than frowning on squares who get married, hating children, and doing a lot of drugs and alcohol. For the most part in these essays, it does. But — especially as a gay man who works with poor mothers — there's a lot that rubs me the wrong way.
I'm sure it's supposed to, as revolutionary gay politics has always loved the provocative. That's why I like this book, and have read it. I just want a revolutionary gay politic that doesn't traffic in notions of cool/uncool. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sure it's supposed to, as revolutionary gay politics has always loved the provocative. That's why I like this book, and have read it. I just want a revolutionary gay politic that doesn't traffic in notions of cool/uncool. Is that too much to ask?
May 18, 2020
The word “radical” does not mean “extreme” but rather “going to the root.” That is, being radical is about going to the root of the problem, the root of our patriarchal a.k.a. dominator society, finding solutions for overthrowing it, and living as much as possible outside of the dominant system. During the same-sex marriage debate, I kept reflecting on how marriage was invented for the purpose of enslaving women. I kept signing petitions in favor of gay marriage while feeling apprehensive and wondering why lesbians, especially, would want to participate in such a patriarchal establishment.
Reading the anthology That’s Revolting was a great relief, because it proves that many people see things the same way I do, from a radical point of view rather than a liberal point of view. That’s Revolting is for those who want a nonviolent revolution, not a white picket fence and a house in suburbia. It is for those who question the American dream rather than gobble up capitalism, respectability, or the nuclear family lifestyle. It is for those who wish to overthrow marriage and the military, not participate in them. This diverse anthology is social criticism, inspiration, words of reassurance that radical activism continues, and a call to action.
Reading the anthology That’s Revolting was a great relief, because it proves that many people see things the same way I do, from a radical point of view rather than a liberal point of view. That’s Revolting is for those who want a nonviolent revolution, not a white picket fence and a house in suburbia. It is for those who question the American dream rather than gobble up capitalism, respectability, or the nuclear family lifestyle. It is for those who wish to overthrow marriage and the military, not participate in them. This diverse anthology is social criticism, inspiration, words of reassurance that radical activism continues, and a call to action.
February 22, 2008
This book embodies all of my deep ambivalence about radical queers. I agree with pretty much everything but...get over yourselves?
July 19, 2014
It can be hard giving a single rating to an anthology, especially when there are thirty-two different pieces in that anthology. Some of them are really good--delightfully seditious pieces denouncing "Stepford homosexuals", capitalism, and the prison industrial complex--but some of them seem like bad choices. There were far too many essays or interviews with cis gay men and/or cis lesbians, and those were all boring (they didn't queer the norm at all).
The worst was an essay about parenting by this cis lesbian who referred to Chaz Bono by his birth name and the wrong pronouns, advocated for the nonconsensual outing of variant people, and used transphobic slurs. For my own sake, I'm going to try not to go off on a rant about how dangerous outing people is and how it perpetuates violence. Instead, here's a reminder for people who try to "reclaim" words:
1) an individual can only reclaim words that have been used against them or people in their particular identity group (ex, a white person cannot reclaim the N word).
2) an individual can only reclaim a word for themselves, not for others within their identity group (ex, a lot of trans people are not okay with the T word, so even if a specific trans person likes it that doesn't mean they can or should refer to all trans people that way).
These are two important things which the contributors to this book of essays seem to forget. It's really frustrating coming across transphobia, and violent words and imagery that come out of nowhere, and other oppressive/disturbing things in a book edited by a trans person who seems to advocate self-liberation. I have a lot of respect for Mattilda, and I really look up to her, but I think writings by the likes of Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha and Fabian Romero (in place of essays about "cruising" gay cis men or someone who "was a couple blocks away from Stonewall") would have improved the collection.
The worst was an essay about parenting by this cis lesbian who referred to Chaz Bono by his birth name and the wrong pronouns, advocated for the nonconsensual outing of variant people, and used transphobic slurs. For my own sake, I'm going to try not to go off on a rant about how dangerous outing people is and how it perpetuates violence. Instead, here's a reminder for people who try to "reclaim" words:
1) an individual can only reclaim words that have been used against them or people in their particular identity group (ex, a white person cannot reclaim the N word).
2) an individual can only reclaim a word for themselves, not for others within their identity group (ex, a lot of trans people are not okay with the T word, so even if a specific trans person likes it that doesn't mean they can or should refer to all trans people that way).
These are two important things which the contributors to this book of essays seem to forget. It's really frustrating coming across transphobia, and violent words and imagery that come out of nowhere, and other oppressive/disturbing things in a book edited by a trans person who seems to advocate self-liberation. I have a lot of respect for Mattilda, and I really look up to her, but I think writings by the likes of Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha and Fabian Romero (in place of essays about "cruising" gay cis men or someone who "was a couple blocks away from Stonewall") would have improved the collection.
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June 25, 2007Ten years ago one might not have imagined the largest national gay rights lobbying group (Human Rights Campaign) endorsing a right-wing Republican Senatorial candidate (Al D'Amato in New York), or the San Francisco Pride parade adopting the Budweiser advertising slogan as its offcial theme (2002). As an assimilationist gay mainstream wields increasing power, the focus of gay struggle has become limited to marriage, military service, and adoption. The gay mainstream presents a sanitized, straight-friendly version of gay identity which makes it safe for Richard Chamberlain or Rosie O'Donnell to come out, and still rake in the bucks. By the twisted priorities of this gay mainstream, it's okay to oppose a queer youth shelter becuase it might interfere with property values, or to fight against the inclusion of transgendered people under hate crimes legislation because this might not appeal to straight voters. As the gay mainstream ironically prioritizes the attainment of straight privilege over all else, it drains queer identity of any meaning, relevance, or cultural value - and calls this progress.
That's Revolting shows us what the new queer resistance looks like. The collection is a fistful of rocks to throw at the glass house of Gaylandia. That's Revolting uses queer identity and struggle as a starting point from which to reframe, reclaim, and re-shape the world. The collection challenges the commercialized, commodified, and hyper-objectified view of gay/queer identity projected by the mainstream (straight and gay) media by exploring queer struggles to transform gender, revolutionize sexuality, and build community/family outside of traditional models.
Edited by Matt Bernstein Sycamore (aka Mattilda), the creator and driving force behind Gay Shame, the radical queer organization in San Francisco that was primarily responsible for the protests, mobilizations, and guerilla tactics that shut down the city of San Francisco in response to the declaration of war on Iraq, That's Revolting brings the post-identity politics of a new generation of pissed off queers to the light. The collection is both a blueprint and a call to action.
That's Revolting shows us what the new queer resistance looks like. The collection is a fistful of rocks to throw at the glass house of Gaylandia. That's Revolting uses queer identity and struggle as a starting point from which to reframe, reclaim, and re-shape the world. The collection challenges the commercialized, commodified, and hyper-objectified view of gay/queer identity projected by the mainstream (straight and gay) media by exploring queer struggles to transform gender, revolutionize sexuality, and build community/family outside of traditional models.
Edited by Matt Bernstein Sycamore (aka Mattilda), the creator and driving force behind Gay Shame, the radical queer organization in San Francisco that was primarily responsible for the protests, mobilizations, and guerilla tactics that shut down the city of San Francisco in response to the declaration of war on Iraq, That's Revolting brings the post-identity politics of a new generation of pissed off queers to the light. The collection is both a blueprint and a call to action.
July 27, 2011
Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore raises the new call to arms for all self-identified freaks, queers, pervs, weirdos, and anyone else not interested in fitting themselves into the nice, neat assimilationist "homos are just like everyone else" box. Her anthology issues a "wake the fuck up" for all those wondering why mainstream gays & allies have been fighting so hard to appease and comfort the Right & the mainstream media, telling them that the thing we want most in the world is the "right" to take part in one of the most historically patriarchal, mysogynistic, capitalistic institutions of the straight world - i.e. marriage. If you've ever wondered what other choices are out there, then this is the book for you.
June 20, 2020
No longer using this website, but I'm leaving up old reviews. Fuck Jeff Bezos. Find me on LibraryThing: https://www.librarything.com/profile/...
This book really challenged my views on sexuality, sex, and radical feminist and queer thought. Theory, story, interview and case study blended together to create a coherent radical queer agenda against assimilation into the white supremacist capitalist patriarchy. The hot topics of the "gay rights" white gay male "movement" are Gay Marriage, Adoption, and the Right to Military Service. These all benefit the system more than they benefit queer liberation, so that even if you win, you lose.
One of the highlights of the book for me was the story of PISS, the campus movement to create gender-neutral and handicap accessable bathrooms. To have things as simple as being able to go to the bathroom be a serious complication with your body and identity is heartbreaking. It was inspiring to read about what I had previously thought of as disparate movements working together for a common goal and supporting one another.
Another highlight was the article stating that Gay Marriage is racist. Marriage is seen as the route to assimilation and acceptance from the hetero world. The interviewee made the case, however, that black families and mixed-race families often have the "foundation" of marriage. Black people have done the experiment of marrying for acceptance within the larger society, but the state sees them as "queer" (as in, part of the "other" that isn't white and wealthy). The state destroys their families by jailing the father, refusing welfare to the mother, and putting up children for adoption or foster care. Therefore, marriage is an ineffective route to acceptance, and even if it were effective, it would be selective acceptance based on race, as black people are systematically denied family and marriage.
After reading this book, I was embarassed that I put HRC stickers on my class binders in university to show that I was a queer ally.
This book really challenged my views on sexuality, sex, and radical feminist and queer thought. Theory, story, interview and case study blended together to create a coherent radical queer agenda against assimilation into the white supremacist capitalist patriarchy. The hot topics of the "gay rights" white gay male "movement" are Gay Marriage, Adoption, and the Right to Military Service. These all benefit the system more than they benefit queer liberation, so that even if you win, you lose.
One of the highlights of the book for me was the story of PISS, the campus movement to create gender-neutral and handicap accessable bathrooms. To have things as simple as being able to go to the bathroom be a serious complication with your body and identity is heartbreaking. It was inspiring to read about what I had previously thought of as disparate movements working together for a common goal and supporting one another.
Another highlight was the article stating that Gay Marriage is racist. Marriage is seen as the route to assimilation and acceptance from the hetero world. The interviewee made the case, however, that black families and mixed-race families often have the "foundation" of marriage. Black people have done the experiment of marrying for acceptance within the larger society, but the state sees them as "queer" (as in, part of the "other" that isn't white and wealthy). The state destroys their families by jailing the father, refusing welfare to the mother, and putting up children for adoption or foster care. Therefore, marriage is an ineffective route to acceptance, and even if it were effective, it would be selective acceptance based on race, as black people are systematically denied family and marriage.
After reading this book, I was embarassed that I put HRC stickers on my class binders in university to show that I was a queer ally.
January 13, 2021
good intro but boring otherwise
ironically not radical unless "omg im having gay sexxx @ an aids rally" counts
ironically not radical unless "omg im having gay sexxx @ an aids rally" counts
January 14, 2024
loved this dive into a radical early 2000s that often feels so far away. and resisting assimilation as a collective organizing project instead of an individual choice !
August 4, 2008
This book is unique in its perspectives of the queer rights movement, and publicly thwarts the mainstream in a manner that makes most people cringe. That part, I like. I also appreciate the telling of the more "underground" history that is often hidden or not as well known. Additionally, it was great to have way more than just the token inclusion of trans/genderqueer individuals.
I don't agree with all of the tactics taken and advocated by the writers, and I don't necessarily believe that living exactly opposite of convention makes you a revolutionary. I am all for resisting assimilation, and am often criticized for going against the mainstream, but being against convention just for the sake of being against convention makes one just as controlled by it. The glorification of being arrested was also problematic, since the risks of arrest and how much one stands to lose are not equal, and should not necessarily be as much of a marker of a successful revolt as it was portrayed in this book.
Overall, however, this book is truly revolutionary, and stands out from the rest.
I don't agree with all of the tactics taken and advocated by the writers, and I don't necessarily believe that living exactly opposite of convention makes you a revolutionary. I am all for resisting assimilation, and am often criticized for going against the mainstream, but being against convention just for the sake of being against convention makes one just as controlled by it. The glorification of being arrested was also problematic, since the risks of arrest and how much one stands to lose are not equal, and should not necessarily be as much of a marker of a successful revolt as it was portrayed in this book.
Overall, however, this book is truly revolutionary, and stands out from the rest.
September 7, 2011
Nice, but a little naïve.
January 12, 2018
"That's Revolting: Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation," is am important book that documents and keeps history alive that would otherwise be forgotten. First thing I learned is that it is a false belief that the Stonewall riot/revolt started while mourning Judy Garland's death. This is briefly mentioned. This myth was something I read somewhere about the Stonewall rebellion that seemed to make sense, I even wrote a poem about it, I still like the idea but stand corrected. This book does that task, it corrects our historical knowledge. It makes me wonder about truth, or what we think is true if we were not actually there. I only wish there were a footnote as to how that rumor got started, were they playing a Judy Garland song at the time? Time passes, we've lost so many people, we've lost so much, but here Mattilda gives us a document of people from the time and place to reconstruct lost history.
In "Sylvia & Sylvia's Children: A Battle for a Queer Public Space" by Benjamin Shepard, we learn about the gentrification of the piers by the "quality of life" developers. We get insight into Sylvia's life and her lover Martha P. Johnson, who was later murdered on the piers. Together they founded STAR, Street Transvetite Action Revolutionaries. So much good work was done, so many fought the good fight.
Later there is the essay "Corroding Our Quality of Life" by Justin Anton Rosado, one of the youth who was displaced, telling a personal tale from his experience as one of the homeless youths who made the pier home and how they were driven out, and how they fought back. So many organizations were formed that have been forgotten. He was a part of the group FIERCE. It was heartbreaking to read his story.
The piece "Revolting" by Josina Manu Maltzman, sums up this book with this quote, "We fagulously freaky queerbos are not looking for a seat at the table of normality." When someone at a pride march said you look proud, the response was, "We're not proud! We're revolting!" The angst in this book is the corporate take over of the world. How commercialization and militarization takes away power.
In the piece "Fed Up Queers" (FUQ) by Jennifer Flynn & Eustacia Smith (also Mattilda has sections), FUQ organized the political funeral after Matthew's murder, Jennifer Flynn says, "Power that is handed over, conceded without demand, is always a gift that can be taken back at will." This comes at the end of a paragraph about the gay pride organizers, and it is after Matthew Shephard's death, and how people who buy into the commerization of gay pride do not realize that, "asimulation would not only hurt others, it might even backfire."
I am lucky to know Mattilda, and we are lucky to have her living in Seattle. She brought in Sarah Schulman to talk about her latest book on communication, and she ran a year-long series titled Contageous Exchanges at our local literary center, Hugo House. She brings history, diversity, and a perspective of radical politics that is vitally needed as our city is undergoing the same changes as NY and SF went through. She understands the truth that assimilation is simply fascism with a different name.
In "Sylvia & Sylvia's Children: A Battle for a Queer Public Space" by Benjamin Shepard, we learn about the gentrification of the piers by the "quality of life" developers. We get insight into Sylvia's life and her lover Martha P. Johnson, who was later murdered on the piers. Together they founded STAR, Street Transvetite Action Revolutionaries. So much good work was done, so many fought the good fight.
Later there is the essay "Corroding Our Quality of Life" by Justin Anton Rosado, one of the youth who was displaced, telling a personal tale from his experience as one of the homeless youths who made the pier home and how they were driven out, and how they fought back. So many organizations were formed that have been forgotten. He was a part of the group FIERCE. It was heartbreaking to read his story.
The piece "Revolting" by Josina Manu Maltzman, sums up this book with this quote, "We fagulously freaky queerbos are not looking for a seat at the table of normality." When someone at a pride march said you look proud, the response was, "We're not proud! We're revolting!" The angst in this book is the corporate take over of the world. How commercialization and militarization takes away power.
In the piece "Fed Up Queers" (FUQ) by Jennifer Flynn & Eustacia Smith (also Mattilda has sections), FUQ organized the political funeral after Matthew's murder, Jennifer Flynn says, "Power that is handed over, conceded without demand, is always a gift that can be taken back at will." This comes at the end of a paragraph about the gay pride organizers, and it is after Matthew Shephard's death, and how people who buy into the commerization of gay pride do not realize that, "asimulation would not only hurt others, it might even backfire."
I am lucky to know Mattilda, and we are lucky to have her living in Seattle. She brought in Sarah Schulman to talk about her latest book on communication, and she ran a year-long series titled Contageous Exchanges at our local literary center, Hugo House. She brings history, diversity, and a perspective of radical politics that is vitally needed as our city is undergoing the same changes as NY and SF went through. She understands the truth that assimilation is simply fascism with a different name.
April 7, 2013
Provocative collection of essays on radical LGBT movements/groups/individuals. As with most anthologies, the quality of the writing varies. It may be unfair to ask for balance in a book devoted to airing a non-mainstream viewpoint. Certainly the idea that gay marriage is an important issue and healthy development, the overall theme that LGBT people are "just like everyone else" except for the fact of a non-chosen orientation, etc. gets plenty of airtime, so why not one book entirely for dissenters?
But still, if for some reason I were made the editor, I'd have cut the length by one-third (doing a search-delete for every negative mention after the first of "Log Cabin Republicans", "soccer Mom lesbians", and "Andrew Sullivan" should do the trick) and used the saved space to invite a couple responses from Human Rights Campaign staff or the like.
But still, if for some reason I were made the editor, I'd have cut the length by one-third (doing a search-delete for every negative mention after the first of "Log Cabin Republicans", "soccer Mom lesbians", and "Andrew Sullivan" should do the trick) and used the saved space to invite a couple responses from Human Rights Campaign staff or the like.
April 2, 2018
Intellectually and ideologically challenging, written / filled with language more accessible than the headier "queer theory." This collection of essays provides excellent historical context to socio-spatial issues queer communities face, particularly gentrification, police violence, and intra-community conflict along racial, class, sexual, gender, and political lines.
You're almost definitely not going to agree with all of the points asserted in this book, especially by those who self-identify with more anti-family, anti-future, and anti-marriage views. But this collection helped me read those perspectives with more understanding and compassion than, for example, "Against Equality! Queer Revolution, Not Mere Inclusion" did.
Brilliantly edited & contributed to by Mattilda, I especially recommend having a notebook and pen by your side to take notes and quotes.
You're almost definitely not going to agree with all of the points asserted in this book, especially by those who self-identify with more anti-family, anti-future, and anti-marriage views. But this collection helped me read those perspectives with more understanding and compassion than, for example, "Against Equality! Queer Revolution, Not Mere Inclusion" did.
Brilliantly edited & contributed to by Mattilda, I especially recommend having a notebook and pen by your side to take notes and quotes.
March 11, 2016
A series of essays dealing with the queer resistance, anarchy, anti-racism, queer youth of color, intersectional oppression, and activism. Much of it in the form of histories/herstories written by members of activist movements. While That's Revolting! can be quite intellectually heavy (and occasionally seems a bit one-note), it also offers a glimpse of a heady world where shocking behavior for it's own sake is prized and rejecting the status quo is the norm. I recommend it for anyone who is interested in intersectional activism or who wants to learn more about some of the "unwritten" history/herstory of queer communities.
November 4, 2011
The essays varied between insightful critiques and monotonous repetition, creative action and self-indulgence. "Calling All Restroom Revolutionaries" is a worthwhile read, however many of the essays by Mattilda displayed little more than ineffective direct action and self-obsession by someone rightly angry with assimilationist agendas.
January 23, 2011
this is pretty 101 radical anti-assimilationist queer politics. which is good to have in the world, for sure! but I mean, if you've heard of it you've probably already been exposed to the ideas in it. having said that, it's generally clear and eloquent and would be good to read if you don't feel like you fully understand why some queers are against marriage, the military, etc.
October 24, 2011
I thought this book was amazing!! The essays are thought provoking and inspiring. Especially when the address Queers of Color and the current Gay Rights Movement. I recommend this book tremendously.
June 14, 2017
i found this hard to get through. some essays were great and really interesting, especially personal life stories from older people. some stuff was a bit repetitive. it didn't really fit with my idea of 'strategies for resisting assimilation'. but that's ok.
December 1, 2008
I wouldn't say every essay in here is a 5-star, but there are enough of them to make this book worth it. Very up-to-date and an excellent refresher about the current faces of queer activism.
November 21, 2015
That's repetitive.
August 19, 2024
it would be a lot better with less racism. there’s lots of amazing works in the book. there’s an equal amount of white organizations talking about how they were racist while they operated or clashed with queer of color organizers. one example: “not one of our best moments… we were showing the first overt representation of a black gay man. and yet, it was profoundly racist in and of itself. and homophobic.” “Being a mostly white group, we were aware that we could choose not to focus on certain issues”
“Also, as an almost entirely white led group with increasingly tense relationships with some of the organizations that were led by queer people of color…”
moments like this happen over and over again in interviews and stories which never feel adequately addressed by the authors.
to top it all off, the author/organizer of the anthology has the n word in their writing for absolutely no reason, there’s also another white author at the very beginning using the n word???
“Also, as an almost entirely white led group with increasingly tense relationships with some of the organizations that were led by queer people of color…”
moments like this happen over and over again in interviews and stories which never feel adequately addressed by the authors.
to top it all off, the author/organizer of the anthology has the n word in their writing for absolutely no reason, there’s also another white author at the very beginning using the n word???
dnf
August 25, 2022DNF - read to page 46
I dnf’d this book because it wasn’t what I was looking for. This isn’t to say it was bad, at least of the essays I had read. Just a note that it wasn’t clear to me how the essays were grouped in each section and thought that was a weakness if you were trying to pinpoint something specific.
Who might like this book? Mainly radical queers or those interested in radical queer thought though be warned this book is dated. Not dated as in themes because many of what issues this book focuses on is still pertinent today. However, I think currently there is a better understanding of how racism permeates even the left, the need for more poc voices and more openings for our voices to be heard, and a shift or new ways of community building that move things forward. Ultimately, I think that’s what I was looking for. How people think and build movements in the 2020s.
I dnf’d this book because it wasn’t what I was looking for. This isn’t to say it was bad, at least of the essays I had read. Just a note that it wasn’t clear to me how the essays were grouped in each section and thought that was a weakness if you were trying to pinpoint something specific.
Who might like this book? Mainly radical queers or those interested in radical queer thought though be warned this book is dated. Not dated as in themes because many of what issues this book focuses on is still pertinent today. However, I think currently there is a better understanding of how racism permeates even the left, the need for more poc voices and more openings for our voices to be heard, and a shift or new ways of community building that move things forward. Ultimately, I think that’s what I was looking for. How people think and build movements in the 2020s.
December 28, 2025
2/5
Ehhhh, didn’t enjoy this nearly as much as I expected. There were quite a few chapters I completely loved. I love insights into the pre- and early-Stonewall days of queer life. Ironically, the chapters I found myself liking the least were those that Mattilda wrote herself. Maybe because I’m living in a post-gay marriage world and have leftist infighting as a pet peeve,,,, Still an important read for many but one I personally regret.
Ehhhh, didn’t enjoy this nearly as much as I expected. There were quite a few chapters I completely loved. I love insights into the pre- and early-Stonewall days of queer life. Ironically, the chapters I found myself liking the least were those that Mattilda wrote herself. Maybe because I’m living in a post-gay marriage world and have leftist infighting as a pet peeve,,,, Still an important read for many but one I personally regret.
November 29, 2023
i don’t always agree with the ideas and opinions presented, but it’s interesting to read nonetheless.
content/trigger warnings; homophobia, f slur, lesbophobia, biphobia, transphobia, t slur, deadnaming, misgendering, outing, queerphobia, intersex-phobia, racism, n slur, classism, sexism, ableism, ageism, poverty, sex, kink/bdsm, sex work, sexual assault, rape, domestic violence, child abuse, murder, death, hiv/aids, loss of loved ones, loss/grief, war, terrorism, bombings, police brutality, incarceration,
as always, i’m much more into the essays that are ideas and criticisms and theory type stuff, than anything resembling a personal history. some favorites “more abercrombie than activist?: queer working class rural youth vs the new gay teenager” by kaila kuban and chris grinnell. i really enjoy the approach to the essay, the criticism of an existing text, and the ideas put forward for how to better help and serve queer youth as adults, specifically those who aren’t privileged. the criticism of queer youth services not only being constructed through a lens of what adults think youth need or want instead of consulting said youth, but having restrictions placed on the adults in how they can interact with the youth, such as no contact outside of the group meeting or no sharing personal information, is something i don’t think i’ve really seen before. “choice cuts” by charlie anders, a dissection of the “born this way” narrative, which i’m always here for. “calling all restroom revolutionaries!” by simone chess, alison kafer, jessi quizar, and mattie udora richardson, which is all about bathroom safety and accessibility. i always love essays that revolve around disability and ableism, i think they’re very lacking in queer anthologies.
i do think the book gets a bit repetitive and some essays feel a little pointless. other essays i find questionable and others still i think are outright offensive. and i would appreciate more time being focused on what people can actually do, rather than what they shouldn’t do and what they should believe in. inaction isn’t action and a belief isn’t a material difference being made in people’s lives.
and the main thing that i can never wrap my head around is the anti-marriage/parenting stance. i understand where the authors are coming from, most of the time anyway, but in general, there’s just a gross, condescending vibe that tends to permeate these essays. like the authors think they’re better than the “basically straight” gays and lesbians who either don’t know better or just don’t care about queer people and struggles simply because they want to be married to their partners or raise children with them. i don’t think getting married or having kids warrants scorn or precludes caring about other issues or advocating for other queer people or challenging the gatekeeping of marriage, the exclusivity of its benefits, and it being positioned as the only or most important option.
of all the essays, “is gay marriage racist?” by marlon m. bailey, priya kandaswamy, and marrie udora richardson is probably the most convincing i’ve read, even though, i’m obviously still not there. and “never a bridesmaid, never a bride” by carol queen doesn’t so much as advocate against same gender marriage as it advocates for having many different and equal options for queer relationship configurations and argues positioning marriage as the only and ultimate choice erases and minimizes the diversity of what our experiences are and can be.
now for some quotes:
“homo now stands more for homogenous.” (from: “there’s more to life than platinum: challenging the tyranny of sweatshop-produced rainbow flags and participatory patriarchy” by mattilda bernstein sycamore)
“assimilation is violence, not just the violence of cultural erasure, but the violence of stepping on anyone who might get in the way of your upward mobility. gay (and lesbian!) landlords evict people with aids to increase property values, gay bar owners arrest homeless queers so they don t get in the way of business, and gay political consultants mastermind the election of pro-development, anti-poor candidates.” (from: “there’s more to life than platinum: challenging the tyranny of sweatshop-produced rainbow flags and participatory patriarchy” by mattilda bernstein sycamore)
“the struggle for gay liberation can never take a backseat to anything, but always at the forefront must be the class struggle. if power were all of a sudden handed to a gay ruling class in america, the exploitative relationships would continue. there would still be racism, class oppression, women’s oppression ... the only thing that would change is there would be less homophobia.” (from: “queering the underground: an interview with george jackson brigade veterans rita ‘bo’ brown and ed mead” by daniel burton-rose)
“what is more important, however, is whether the queer movement will continue to court the rich and powerful as a way of obtaining influence and power while refusing to address issues affecting the poorest among us.” (from: “it’s all about class” by tommi avicolli mecca)
“even in the face of mainstream adult ‘gay rights’ movements that work consistently for adult benefits, like marriage and adoption rights, queer teens and their allies are fighting for visibility and a space in the movement. so when we hear from authors who not only marginalize but erase queer youth activism, we get pissed. when the vision of ‘normalcy’ these authors put forth is inherently (middle) class-based and consistently negates the experiences of working class and rural queer youth, how could we not? savin-williams’s book silences our experiences and perspectives in order to present a neat, bounded, white, middle-class representation of all queer youth.” (from: “more abercrombie than activist?: queer working class rural youth vs the new gay teenager” by kaila kuban and chris grinnell)
“and when we assume queer youth harbor a desire for ‘normalcy’ and assimilation while ignoring the structural and material conditions ol their lives, we paint a picture of these ‘new gay teenagers’ which is unable to address and account for the diverse contexts in which these youth are living. savin-williams erases the struggles of queer youth to organize against queer oppression and against all the oppressions youth face—whether due to gender, race, class, geographic location, educational opportunities, (dis)ability, or especially age. yet more and more, queer youth are taking stands and fighting these structural oppressions in a variety of contexts and through a multiplicity of strategies.” (from: “more abercrombie than activist?: queer working class rural youth vs the new gay teenager” by kaila kuban and chris grinnell)
“the implication of the ‘we’re just built this way’ argument always seems to me that if queer people could choose, of course they would choose to be straight.” (from: “choice cuts” by charlie anders)
“saying, ‘i chose this’ automatically puts you beyond the pale. it implies a value judgment. it leaves open the possibility that other supposed straights could choose to go off the rails as well. can you imagine anything scarier to the straight world? we could start an ex-straight movement, proclaim that straightness can be cured! all the worst nightmares about queers recruiting would come true. so i don’t have much time for people who try to fit me into their prefab narratives. it seems like if you’re going to be a productive member of queer society, you have to treat your queerness as something like a nervous tic.” (from: “choice cuts” by charlie anders)
“unless we mindfully make marriage one choice among many, many equal choices, we’ve elected to minimize diversity.” (from: “never a bridesmaid, never a bride” by carol queen)
“mainstream gay media has often contributed to pressure on the gay community, particularly gay men, to be hyper-able and gender conforming. images of big, beefy, muscle-bound bodies decorate the ads in gay publications and the words ‘no fats or fems’ frequently appear in gay personal ads. we believe that this disavowal of queers that are too queer—those of us who are trans-identified, genderqueer, too poor to afford the latest fashions, disabled, fat, in-your-face political—is the result of internalized shame. the gay community has internalized the larger culture’s homophobia and transphobia, which has made us ashamed of our visible queerness, especially any signs of genderqueerness. we have internalized the larger culture’s ableism, which has made us ashamed of our disabilities and illnesses.” (from: “calling all restroom revolutionaries!” by simone chess, alison kafer, jessi quizar, and mattie udora richardson)
content/trigger warnings; homophobia, f slur, lesbophobia, biphobia, transphobia, t slur, deadnaming, misgendering, outing, queerphobia, intersex-phobia, racism, n slur, classism, sexism, ableism, ageism, poverty, sex, kink/bdsm, sex work, sexual assault, rape, domestic violence, child abuse, murder, death, hiv/aids, loss of loved ones, loss/grief, war, terrorism, bombings, police brutality, incarceration,
as always, i’m much more into the essays that are ideas and criticisms and theory type stuff, than anything resembling a personal history. some favorites “more abercrombie than activist?: queer working class rural youth vs the new gay teenager” by kaila kuban and chris grinnell. i really enjoy the approach to the essay, the criticism of an existing text, and the ideas put forward for how to better help and serve queer youth as adults, specifically those who aren’t privileged. the criticism of queer youth services not only being constructed through a lens of what adults think youth need or want instead of consulting said youth, but having restrictions placed on the adults in how they can interact with the youth, such as no contact outside of the group meeting or no sharing personal information, is something i don’t think i’ve really seen before. “choice cuts” by charlie anders, a dissection of the “born this way” narrative, which i’m always here for. “calling all restroom revolutionaries!” by simone chess, alison kafer, jessi quizar, and mattie udora richardson, which is all about bathroom safety and accessibility. i always love essays that revolve around disability and ableism, i think they’re very lacking in queer anthologies.
i do think the book gets a bit repetitive and some essays feel a little pointless. other essays i find questionable and others still i think are outright offensive. and i would appreciate more time being focused on what people can actually do, rather than what they shouldn’t do and what they should believe in. inaction isn’t action and a belief isn’t a material difference being made in people’s lives.
and the main thing that i can never wrap my head around is the anti-marriage/parenting stance. i understand where the authors are coming from, most of the time anyway, but in general, there’s just a gross, condescending vibe that tends to permeate these essays. like the authors think they’re better than the “basically straight” gays and lesbians who either don’t know better or just don’t care about queer people and struggles simply because they want to be married to their partners or raise children with them. i don’t think getting married or having kids warrants scorn or precludes caring about other issues or advocating for other queer people or challenging the gatekeeping of marriage, the exclusivity of its benefits, and it being positioned as the only or most important option.
of all the essays, “is gay marriage racist?” by marlon m. bailey, priya kandaswamy, and marrie udora richardson is probably the most convincing i’ve read, even though, i’m obviously still not there. and “never a bridesmaid, never a bride” by carol queen doesn’t so much as advocate against same gender marriage as it advocates for having many different and equal options for queer relationship configurations and argues positioning marriage as the only and ultimate choice erases and minimizes the diversity of what our experiences are and can be.
now for some quotes:
“homo now stands more for homogenous.” (from: “there’s more to life than platinum: challenging the tyranny of sweatshop-produced rainbow flags and participatory patriarchy” by mattilda bernstein sycamore)
“assimilation is violence, not just the violence of cultural erasure, but the violence of stepping on anyone who might get in the way of your upward mobility. gay (and lesbian!) landlords evict people with aids to increase property values, gay bar owners arrest homeless queers so they don t get in the way of business, and gay political consultants mastermind the election of pro-development, anti-poor candidates.” (from: “there’s more to life than platinum: challenging the tyranny of sweatshop-produced rainbow flags and participatory patriarchy” by mattilda bernstein sycamore)
“the struggle for gay liberation can never take a backseat to anything, but always at the forefront must be the class struggle. if power were all of a sudden handed to a gay ruling class in america, the exploitative relationships would continue. there would still be racism, class oppression, women’s oppression ... the only thing that would change is there would be less homophobia.” (from: “queering the underground: an interview with george jackson brigade veterans rita ‘bo’ brown and ed mead” by daniel burton-rose)
“what is more important, however, is whether the queer movement will continue to court the rich and powerful as a way of obtaining influence and power while refusing to address issues affecting the poorest among us.” (from: “it’s all about class” by tommi avicolli mecca)
“even in the face of mainstream adult ‘gay rights’ movements that work consistently for adult benefits, like marriage and adoption rights, queer teens and their allies are fighting for visibility and a space in the movement. so when we hear from authors who not only marginalize but erase queer youth activism, we get pissed. when the vision of ‘normalcy’ these authors put forth is inherently (middle) class-based and consistently negates the experiences of working class and rural queer youth, how could we not? savin-williams’s book silences our experiences and perspectives in order to present a neat, bounded, white, middle-class representation of all queer youth.” (from: “more abercrombie than activist?: queer working class rural youth vs the new gay teenager” by kaila kuban and chris grinnell)
“and when we assume queer youth harbor a desire for ‘normalcy’ and assimilation while ignoring the structural and material conditions ol their lives, we paint a picture of these ‘new gay teenagers’ which is unable to address and account for the diverse contexts in which these youth are living. savin-williams erases the struggles of queer youth to organize against queer oppression and against all the oppressions youth face—whether due to gender, race, class, geographic location, educational opportunities, (dis)ability, or especially age. yet more and more, queer youth are taking stands and fighting these structural oppressions in a variety of contexts and through a multiplicity of strategies.” (from: “more abercrombie than activist?: queer working class rural youth vs the new gay teenager” by kaila kuban and chris grinnell)
“the implication of the ‘we’re just built this way’ argument always seems to me that if queer people could choose, of course they would choose to be straight.” (from: “choice cuts” by charlie anders)
“saying, ‘i chose this’ automatically puts you beyond the pale. it implies a value judgment. it leaves open the possibility that other supposed straights could choose to go off the rails as well. can you imagine anything scarier to the straight world? we could start an ex-straight movement, proclaim that straightness can be cured! all the worst nightmares about queers recruiting would come true. so i don’t have much time for people who try to fit me into their prefab narratives. it seems like if you’re going to be a productive member of queer society, you have to treat your queerness as something like a nervous tic.” (from: “choice cuts” by charlie anders)
“unless we mindfully make marriage one choice among many, many equal choices, we’ve elected to minimize diversity.” (from: “never a bridesmaid, never a bride” by carol queen)
“mainstream gay media has often contributed to pressure on the gay community, particularly gay men, to be hyper-able and gender conforming. images of big, beefy, muscle-bound bodies decorate the ads in gay publications and the words ‘no fats or fems’ frequently appear in gay personal ads. we believe that this disavowal of queers that are too queer—those of us who are trans-identified, genderqueer, too poor to afford the latest fashions, disabled, fat, in-your-face political—is the result of internalized shame. the gay community has internalized the larger culture’s homophobia and transphobia, which has made us ashamed of our visible queerness, especially any signs of genderqueerness. we have internalized the larger culture’s ableism, which has made us ashamed of our disabilities and illnesses.” (from: “calling all restroom revolutionaries!” by simone chess, alison kafer, jessi quizar, and mattie udora richardson)
June 24, 2012
This book covers such a wide expanse of ideas, it's really very difficult to describe as a whole piece. Ultimately, upon reading the whole thing and skipping some things, etc., I found the most fascinating thing to be that "queer" is a multifaceted word, used to refer to sexuality, gender identity, levels of activism. I really had to evaluate how I identify with the word. I know that for myself, I like it because it feels more all-encompassing than the gay/lesbian binary, and that it's NOT a binary ... it reinforces that sexuality, gender identity, body politics, all is fluid and across a spectrum, not a binary. That being said, there are DEFINITELY some essays I just couldn't get on board with -- the "I'm-queerer-than-you" mentality is really off-putting and exclusionary, in my opinion, and this idea is present in many of the "radical activism" essays. Also, the entitlement that some queer folk feel about telling other queer-identified people that they can't be queer because of x, basically trying to force "queer" into a definable, exclusive box, and keep the unworthy out. I think this is just counterproductive ... I'm also not a get-in-the-streets/get-arrested-for-my-radicalism person, and I feel like that's a valid standpoint. It's in fact privilege that enables some people to go out and get arrested for protests/activism-things, and know that they won't be forever in jail. But would that be the same for people of color? working-class people who can't afford to miss any work? Anyway, that's only a part of the book.
I guess the best part about this collection is that it really shows so many different approaches to queerness and activism, and philosophy, etc., that it really makes you think about your own identity politics and try to articulate the difficult-to-articulate. There were many places that I just felt an aversion to what I was reading, and I had to take a step back and try to figure out what it was making me feel that aversion ... what was it in my understanding of "queer" that didn't mesh with whatever I was reading that made me feel kind of bristly?
So read this book if you want to understand queerness for yourself -- the best part is that you WILL NOT agree with everything in here (I certainly didn't!) but it makes you think and evaluate ...
I guess the best part about this collection is that it really shows so many different approaches to queerness and activism, and philosophy, etc., that it really makes you think about your own identity politics and try to articulate the difficult-to-articulate. There were many places that I just felt an aversion to what I was reading, and I had to take a step back and try to figure out what it was making me feel that aversion ... what was it in my understanding of "queer" that didn't mesh with whatever I was reading that made me feel kind of bristly?
So read this book if you want to understand queerness for yourself -- the best part is that you WILL NOT agree with everything in here (I certainly didn't!) but it makes you think and evaluate ...
May 5, 2012
This book was good for me to read because it gave me a different queer perspective on the relentless drive towards the legalization of gay marriage and other aspects of the current mainstream gay political movement. It also called into question the idea of assimilation - this idea that "queers are just like straight people."
I have always been happy to be part of the queer subculture and for that to be separate and distinct from the mainstream straight culture. The best essay in here was by Carol Queen - I liked it because it did not in fact lambast marriage-type relationships, but wanted it to be a part of many choices of relationship types. I do love that about queer culture - SO many relationship configurations. I enjoy being part of a marriage-like relationship, but it is not the only way, or necessarily the best way (except I do think it is the preferred relationship type when raising children).
The one essay in here that questioned whether it was good for queer to have kids I thought was bunk however. It was clearly one woman's tortured musings who had not come to terms with her own choices. I am VERY pro queer parenthood.
Overall I am glad I read this book. It was a kick in the pants for my Stepford- Homo ways.
I have always been happy to be part of the queer subculture and for that to be separate and distinct from the mainstream straight culture. The best essay in here was by Carol Queen - I liked it because it did not in fact lambast marriage-type relationships, but wanted it to be a part of many choices of relationship types. I do love that about queer culture - SO many relationship configurations. I enjoy being part of a marriage-like relationship, but it is not the only way, or necessarily the best way (except I do think it is the preferred relationship type when raising children).
The one essay in here that questioned whether it was good for queer to have kids I thought was bunk however. It was clearly one woman's tortured musings who had not come to terms with her own choices. I am VERY pro queer parenthood.
Overall I am glad I read this book. It was a kick in the pants for my Stepford- Homo ways.
September 3, 2007
Even though I gave this book four stars I have mixed feelings about this book. The range of essays in this book, ranging from history, theory, diary entries and personal reflection make it very hard to make any particular statement about the entirety of the book other than to say that the various authors are all anti-imperialists, anti-capitalists, anti-sexist and anti-homophobic. There the similarities end, as they remain somewhat confused about what they're actually for.
This is an iconoclastic work on the face on the LGBT movement. While their insights into what the majority of queer activists are doing wrong are right, they don't really make any effort to convert any liberals who might have picked up this book into radical politics. While the authors may have the theory, they don't display any of the patience that is necessary to fully explain it to anybody. They instead choose to be revolting.
However, this isn't to say that there isn't a place for a book like this in a radical library. Just make sure it isn't your only one.
This is an iconoclastic work on the face on the LGBT movement. While their insights into what the majority of queer activists are doing wrong are right, they don't really make any effort to convert any liberals who might have picked up this book into radical politics. While the authors may have the theory, they don't display any of the patience that is necessary to fully explain it to anybody. They instead choose to be revolting.
However, this isn't to say that there isn't a place for a book like this in a radical library. Just make sure it isn't your only one.
October 24, 2013
overall excellent anthology. i have enthusiastically discussed many of these essays. i found it hard to put the book down!
i appreciated the (multiple) accounts of the "quality of life" measures in NYC and the creativity and resilience of the youth of color targeted by the NYPD who organized in resistance. also, the interview on Fed Up Queers and the essay on Gay Shame and their actions and struggles. "Is Gay Marriage Racist?" was excellent, as was Dean Spade's piece. it's not just an anthology on how to resist assimilation- it also addresses who is harmed by gay/lesbian assimilation and why it's important to resist. there was also a lot of honesty about in-group conflicts and decision-making difficulties that, I think, are important for anyone interested in organizing, activism, and horizontal democracy.
there were other parts i didn't have quite as positive a response to, but that's OK. i am mostly full of hope and anticipation to find/read more. the only thing I'm aware of that comes close is the pamphlet, "Out of the Closets and Into the Libraries" - google it!
i appreciated the (multiple) accounts of the "quality of life" measures in NYC and the creativity and resilience of the youth of color targeted by the NYPD who organized in resistance. also, the interview on Fed Up Queers and the essay on Gay Shame and their actions and struggles. "Is Gay Marriage Racist?" was excellent, as was Dean Spade's piece. it's not just an anthology on how to resist assimilation- it also addresses who is harmed by gay/lesbian assimilation and why it's important to resist. there was also a lot of honesty about in-group conflicts and decision-making difficulties that, I think, are important for anyone interested in organizing, activism, and horizontal democracy.
there were other parts i didn't have quite as positive a response to, but that's OK. i am mostly full of hope and anticipation to find/read more. the only thing I'm aware of that comes close is the pamphlet, "Out of the Closets and Into the Libraries" - google it!
January 8, 2008
Intelligent, witty, sexy, raunchy, personal/political essays delivered by primarily young radical queers. Many of the essays are from the perspective of folks living around the San Francisco gay area. The editor is a co-founder of Gay Shame and she spent a lot of time based in the bay area. Some essays examine the margins queers have dwelled in historically and how money and power have shaped mainstream gay politics in the bay area.
These activists examine interconnected systems of oppression, identity and what makes them hot, through relating personal experiences from within radical queer scenes/communities. Many of the essays explore feeling too freaky to fit into outsider groups, or feeling devoted to more than one identity category and existing in the paradox of both belonging and not belonging to multiple groups. This book made me feel hopeful, challenged, and affirmed for my queerdo life and my queerdo friends.
These activists examine interconnected systems of oppression, identity and what makes them hot, through relating personal experiences from within radical queer scenes/communities. Many of the essays explore feeling too freaky to fit into outsider groups, or feeling devoted to more than one identity category and existing in the paradox of both belonging and not belonging to multiple groups. This book made me feel hopeful, challenged, and affirmed for my queerdo life and my queerdo friends.
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