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Mortified 2: Love is a Battlefield
Relive the angst.
From starter girlfriends to escapist fantasies to delusional attempts to stand out amongst their peers, Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield revisits the boundlessly embarrassing topic of childhood love, uncovering priceless artifacts of authentic teen angst that tell of unrequited crushes, awkward hookups, odd celebrity infatuations, and all manner of romantic catastrophes. The now older (and allegedly wiser) authors of these letters, lyrics, and journals bravely share their shame in stories that range from sweetly hopeful to borderline psychotic.
Everyone who ever obsessed over whether that guy or girl in algebra class liked them, or, y'know, liked them liked them, will relish this funny and touching valentine to our collective past
From starter girlfriends to escapist fantasies to delusional attempts to stand out amongst their peers, Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield revisits the boundlessly embarrassing topic of childhood love, uncovering priceless artifacts of authentic teen angst that tell of unrequited crushes, awkward hookups, odd celebrity infatuations, and all manner of romantic catastrophes. The now older (and allegedly wiser) authors of these letters, lyrics, and journals bravely share their shame in stories that range from sweetly hopeful to borderline psychotic.
Everyone who ever obsessed over whether that guy or girl in algebra class liked them, or, y'know, liked them liked them, will relish this funny and touching valentine to our collective past
285 pages, Paperback
First published January 8, 2008
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284 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews
May 14, 2008
More hilarious and cringe-worthy excerpts from teenage diaries, letters, poetry, etc. This collection was released around Valentine’s Day and is romance-themed, which in my option makes it more monotonous and slightly less fun than the last one—whither the Duran Duran self-insertion NC-17 fanfiction? It’s still full of painful/funny gems, however, such as:
Declarations of love!
You are my rose…(rose as in a beautiful flower and also rose as in Rose from Titanic)
Declarations of celebrity love—in verse!
My love for him will surely last forever more,
He starred on Star Trek beside Shatner (who’s a bore).
Deep political analysis!
Eric is dating Marsela, one of the girls from the barrio. I think these Nicaraguans should set some standards for themselves.
Screenplays that contain stage directions such as:
They totally have sex.
And dialogue including:
Lisa: You’re my first lover. I’ll never forget it. It was so hot—I had so many orgasms.
Relationship problems!
Ohh, I love Missy. I mean there’s certain things which I hate about her. Her refusal to see Star Wars, Batman and other movies. Her hatred for cheese.
(That last one, by the way, is what’s almost torn Siria and myself apart.)
As you can see, the book is highly quotable. If you like reading badfic or are fond of Schadenfreude, then you will be in heaven. If you have a bad embarrassment squick, on the other hand…not so much.
Declarations of love!
You are my rose…(rose as in a beautiful flower and also rose as in Rose from Titanic)
Declarations of celebrity love—in verse!
My love for him will surely last forever more,
He starred on Star Trek beside Shatner (who’s a bore).
Deep political analysis!
Eric is dating Marsela, one of the girls from the barrio. I think these Nicaraguans should set some standards for themselves.
Screenplays that contain stage directions such as:
They totally have sex.
And dialogue including:
Lisa: You’re my first lover. I’ll never forget it. It was so hot—I had so many orgasms.
Relationship problems!
Ohh, I love Missy. I mean there’s certain things which I hate about her. Her refusal to see Star Wars, Batman and other movies. Her hatred for cheese.
(That last one, by the way, is what’s almost torn Siria and myself apart.)
As you can see, the book is highly quotable. If you like reading badfic or are fond of Schadenfreude, then you will be in heaven. If you have a bad embarrassment squick, on the other hand…not so much.
December 31, 2009
HILARIOUS! This is #2 in the series, but no need to read in order. A compilation of letters and poems and journal entries from various teenagers centering on love. Mostly ridiculing themselves. I've seen this show live, which is actually even funnier as, read aloud, the poems and letters are even more ridiculous, but reading them definitely takes you back to how PASSIONATE everything is when you're 14-18, and how torrential you feel things. Very funny and interesting!
March 20, 2025
Who can't relate to the intense emotions of being a teenager in love?? These writings were wonderful!!
March 13, 2009
i wouldn't call this "mortified". i would call it something like "somewhat embarrassing" but i know that wouldn't sell books.
i was surprised how many stories were actually not truly embarrassing. sure, the language used and the level of drama we had as teens is, in retrospect, dated and laughable but not exactly "pathetic" as the tag reads.
here's something to be really mortified by... i went to high school with a girl who met a guy at a local record store and that night, with a friend each, they went out. while doing it in the back seat of his car, she pooped all over him. (i guess it must have been the wine coolers). he made her and her friend clean up the car and then left them to find their own way home. that, my reading friends, is embarrassing. there is nothing near that story in "mortified".
two stars for "stairway to winnipeg" and "live evil".
i was surprised how many stories were actually not truly embarrassing. sure, the language used and the level of drama we had as teens is, in retrospect, dated and laughable but not exactly "pathetic" as the tag reads.
here's something to be really mortified by... i went to high school with a girl who met a guy at a local record store and that night, with a friend each, they went out. while doing it in the back seat of his car, she pooped all over him. (i guess it must have been the wine coolers). he made her and her friend clean up the car and then left them to find their own way home. that, my reading friends, is embarrassing. there is nothing near that story in "mortified".
two stars for "stairway to winnipeg" and "live evil".
July 31, 2009
I can't believe this is a sequel. Granted, I did not read the first Mortified book, but if it was even half as bad as this one, how did the editor manage to sell a sequel?
The premise of this book is fairly amusing: print the real, true, actual writing (pertaining to love) written when folks were (junior high, high school, college) kids. The reality of this book is barely funny at all.
The truth it, the folks featured here were dreadful writers when they were kids. The writing is painful to read. Even though I knew I was supposed to cringe, I still felt bad for these people because their writing was terrible. Some of the pieces by the older people (as in high school and early college) wasn't so bad (and some of it even made me snicker and chuckle), but the the younger the writer, the more awful the writing.
I say skip it!
The premise of this book is fairly amusing: print the real, true, actual writing (pertaining to love) written when folks were (junior high, high school, college) kids. The reality of this book is barely funny at all.
The truth it, the folks featured here were dreadful writers when they were kids. The writing is painful to read. Even though I knew I was supposed to cringe, I still felt bad for these people because their writing was terrible. Some of the pieces by the older people (as in high school and early college) wasn't so bad (and some of it even made me snicker and chuckle), but the the younger the writer, the more awful the writing.
I say skip it!
December 1, 2008
An absolutely incredible book for anyone who has ever felt alone in their feelings of abject humiliation towards the person they are or ever were. You are not alone.
Although I have little if any history of my adolescence or teenage years (I seldom if ever journaled, or for that matter, let any of myself be known to anyone, including myself), reading these tales of woe caused my inner child to burst into tears, and then rejoice that there were those not too different from myself.
It also demonstrates that fucking up is just part of life.
Although I have little if any history of my adolescence or teenage years (I seldom if ever journaled, or for that matter, let any of myself be known to anyone, including myself), reading these tales of woe caused my inner child to burst into tears, and then rejoice that there were those not too different from myself.
It also demonstrates that fucking up is just part of life.
January 22, 2008
Not only is this book amazing, I'M PUBLISHED IN IT!!!
March 6, 2020
This is a collection of the adolescent and teenage diary entries of various people regarding their first loves and heavy crushes and their general attempts to deal with the overwhelming felings that accompanied them. Most all of the stories are deeply personal and honest and often humiliatingly cringe worthy, some for their innocence, some for the exact opposite reason. About half are infused with notes, explanations and post-scripts from the now adult versions. Many, but certainly not all, of the entries come across as petty and/or mean, but everyone shows a lot of guts for just allowing this stuff in print. Mortified is a series of open mike type shows where these type of passages are read aloud to the audience, and this is a collection of some of the more intense and compelling stories, so it’s not surprising that pretty much each one is so intense, none less than the stunning story here from someone I’ve personally known for a long time. I knew she had done a few of the shows before and bought the book when I saw she was listed in it, but I did not know her story, and it was possibly the story that surprised and angered me most, though not due to her behavior at all. For someone fascinated with their own failures on this front, and sociology in general, this book was candy for me and I recommend it for anyone who could have been in here, and/or likes to see the raw thoughts of confused hormonal teens (mostly) from the 90’s. 89/100
April 22, 2018
There’s something lacking in just reading these old journal entries. I’ve seen the live show before and laughed my ass off. Not the same impact in printed format for me.
July 19, 2019
Forever one of my absolute favorites.
June 4, 2009
This was a good book but there was nothing in the book that could even remotely be considered 'mortifying'. Nothing. The most embarressing thing to happen to any of these adults as kids was one girl who was assigned to write an essay on a personal wrong done to her. She chose sexual harrassment in high school. She read this in front of her class. And let's just say that by looking at her picture from that time she wasn't the victim of any harrassing- I think it was wishful thinking perhaps.
I don't mean to say this isn't a fun book to read- it's very fast and is entertaining. It can easily be read in a single sitting or over a period of time because each "chapter" is broken up by diary and is only a few pages long. You never really feel out of sorts when you start again. I read it in an evening myself.
I liked how they had a little sentence or two from the adults about their own work as kids- it was obvious all had a sense of humor and a few made me chuckle. I also enjoyed the pictures so the reader could see what these kids looked like. They also stuck a little piece of the original in- if it was a poem in a notebook they copied a sentence or two and stuck it in, if it was a diary entry than a bit of that went it, not much but enough to give the sense of truthfulness and honesty.
That being said, this isn't "mortifying" like it claims.
I will read the first one though- sometime.
I don't mean to say this isn't a fun book to read- it's very fast and is entertaining. It can easily be read in a single sitting or over a period of time because each "chapter" is broken up by diary and is only a few pages long. You never really feel out of sorts when you start again. I read it in an evening myself.
I liked how they had a little sentence or two from the adults about their own work as kids- it was obvious all had a sense of humor and a few made me chuckle. I also enjoyed the pictures so the reader could see what these kids looked like. They also stuck a little piece of the original in- if it was a poem in a notebook they copied a sentence or two and stuck it in, if it was a diary entry than a bit of that went it, not much but enough to give the sense of truthfulness and honesty.
That being said, this isn't "mortifying" like it claims.
I will read the first one though- sometime.
May 3, 2012
I also picked this book up for a dollar at the used bookstore (best store ever). It looked interesting, although I didn't find out later that this is technically the second Mortified book. The first involved general awkwardness of preteens and teens. This one is geared towards awkward young love.
Basically, it's a collection of people's old journal entries and poetry. Usually from when they were teenagers. And we all know that teenage journal entries are pretty cringe-worthy to look back on -- especially if they involve a teenage romance (or infatuation).
Anyone can relate to at least one of these stories. Whether it's the boy who writes love letters to his girlfriend referencing Rose and Jack from Titanic or the kid who found her unsent celebrity obsession letters. I don't even want to know what I probably wrote in the ten letters I sent to Jonathan Taylor Thomas when I was 12.
The book was pretty humorous and I liked the little blurbs that the writers wrote as the looked back on their angst-ridden journal entries. It's a short, quick read that I'd recommend to anyone who ever had a journal when you were younger.
Basically, it's a collection of people's old journal entries and poetry. Usually from when they were teenagers. And we all know that teenage journal entries are pretty cringe-worthy to look back on -- especially if they involve a teenage romance (or infatuation).
Anyone can relate to at least one of these stories. Whether it's the boy who writes love letters to his girlfriend referencing Rose and Jack from Titanic or the kid who found her unsent celebrity obsession letters. I don't even want to know what I probably wrote in the ten letters I sent to Jonathan Taylor Thomas when I was 12.
The book was pretty humorous and I liked the little blurbs that the writers wrote as the looked back on their angst-ridden journal entries. It's a short, quick read that I'd recommend to anyone who ever had a journal when you were younger.
January 16, 2016
I adored this book. I guarantee if you read it you’ll find something that sparks recognition of your own misguided teenage self. It’s a series of people sharing their teenage diary entries on the topic of love and sex. It’s amazing how far off the mark and how hilarious these teenage views can be. One of the lines in this book that will stay with me forever is the plaintive cry of “Mr Willy hasn’t been touched yet”.
I bought this book straight after reading Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic, compiled by David Nadelberg and now I’m sad that there are no Mortified books left for me to read. Thankfully there is a podcast to listen to. I’ve written two fictional teenage diaries and am writing a third, and I’m finding the Mortified project really, really inspiring. I grew up watching American teenagers on TV thinking they had it together more than us British ones. I was so wrong!
I bought this book straight after reading Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic, compiled by David Nadelberg and now I’m sad that there are no Mortified books left for me to read. Thankfully there is a podcast to listen to. I’ve written two fictional teenage diaries and am writing a third, and I’m finding the Mortified project really, really inspiring. I grew up watching American teenagers on TV thinking they had it together more than us British ones. I was so wrong!
July 3, 2008
this was even sadder than the first Mortified. How can you read stuff so pathetic and come out of it feeling anything but queasy. This is a compilation of journal entries sampled from teenagers in the 80's. Its real for sure, but instead of enlightening contemporary history, it shows us a window that is hand picked by exhibitionists. Every entry is volunteered by the author and includes their own commentary. Maybe this is more valuable than I think it is but I doubt it. Most thoughts by most teenagers regarding love are just plain stupid. This book is almost as bad as "teen angst", a compilation of bad teen poetry I tried to read. Found magazine (and books) does such a better job. All of their found journals, notes, etc. are not volunteered by someone with a bloated sense of self importance. They are all "found".
February 22, 2008
This was not as good as the original, but it was still laugh-out-loud funny.
This book contains teen angst centered around love and sex, boys and girls, older men, rebellious love. The nice thing about it was that it contained more "historical" diary entries, those being from the 60's, and it's nice to know the craziness extended back even that far.
There's no doubt of the depth of feeling and passion these kids are feeling. It makes for some great reading. I particularly enjoyed the notes passed back and forth between two lovebirds who were home alone, no parents, and they hopped into bed and wrote notes to each other. I'm sure in some teen fantasy, that was romantic as all get-out, but as a grown up (?), I laughed my butt off.
Enjoy!
This book contains teen angst centered around love and sex, boys and girls, older men, rebellious love. The nice thing about it was that it contained more "historical" diary entries, those being from the 60's, and it's nice to know the craziness extended back even that far.
There's no doubt of the depth of feeling and passion these kids are feeling. It makes for some great reading. I particularly enjoyed the notes passed back and forth between two lovebirds who were home alone, no parents, and they hopped into bed and wrote notes to each other. I'm sure in some teen fantasy, that was romantic as all get-out, but as a grown up (?), I laughed my butt off.
Enjoy!
February 6, 2013
I went to see this live show - where people read from their diaries on stage - last year and it was surprisingly good. I thought I'd be in for an evening of awkward, humiliating humor, but instead the show was honestly funny and very touching. They had a trivia game at the intermission and the friend I was with won a copy of this book. She loaned me the book a few weeks ago and I tore through it. While the stories themselves were fairly amusing, they lost something without the original authors reading them. Also, one or two of them were just creepy. If you get a chance to see the show, by all means, go. But the book is a little flat.
September 14, 2008
I love the recent trend of confession-type books. This one is my favorite, because all of these angry, confused, teenage souls remind me of myself. Pictures of the writers, and copies of their journals make it funnier. Also, unlike others (PostSecret) they don't seem like fake, angry, artistic cries for attention. Unlike Stoned, Naked, and Looking in My Neighbor's Window they won't make you want to rip your eyes out and cry. Sweet, charming, tales of adolescent misery. Perfect to read on a rainy fall day, or while you don't want to do homework.
July 16, 2010
Highly recommended for anyone that ever had a diary as a kid. This book makes me wish I hadn't burned all my journals and diaries after my hasty getaway from adolescence.
Some entries are definitely better than others (and the pubescent attempts at poetry are a little hard to get through sometimes - understandably so) but I appreciate the variety. Everything from the goth girl to the bookworm, to the oversexed Doogie Howser child prodigy will have you cringing, laughing, and reading them to your friends.
Some entries are definitely better than others (and the pubescent attempts at poetry are a little hard to get through sometimes - understandably so) but I appreciate the variety. Everything from the goth girl to the bookworm, to the oversexed Doogie Howser child prodigy will have you cringing, laughing, and reading them to your friends.
September 16, 2013
a funny read, but also a skim-through.
a compilation of embarrassing journal entries, songs, poems, and a few drawings, from people in the throes of love and obsession in their tweens through teens.
you know those journals and writings you have from your childhood? the ones you want to maybe burn? it's ok!! they really are that bad!! but so are everyone else's. i know *i* feel better having read this.
some stories are a little distressing - like the 28 yr old hitting on the 19 yr old, or the teacher making out w/ the high schooler - c'mon, people! get your acts together, man.
a compilation of embarrassing journal entries, songs, poems, and a few drawings, from people in the throes of love and obsession in their tweens through teens.
you know those journals and writings you have from your childhood? the ones you want to maybe burn? it's ok!! they really are that bad!! but so are everyone else's. i know *i* feel better having read this.
some stories are a little distressing - like the 28 yr old hitting on the 19 yr old, or the teacher making out w/ the high schooler - c'mon, people! get your acts together, man.
April 7, 2010
Not quite as funny as the other Mortified but equally entertaining. I wish the "look at where they are now" was directly after the diary entry and specifically addresses the subject of the entry. I found myself flipping to the back after every chapter to read about the authors. Cool concept though! Made me re-read my journal and even tried to kick start the habit again!
Read this if you ever kept a journal.
Read this if you ever kept a journal.
December 20, 2012
This was a quick, fun read, full of teen angst and some almost uncomfortable glimpses into adolescence. The voyeur in me loved getting a deep look into peoples' psyches, but there were definite points where it almost felt like too much. Also, this book lends itself much more to quick bouts of reading, as after a while, most all adolescent fantasizing and teenage poetry gets repetitive. Still, it is a fun and quick read that you can pick up and put down at your leisure.
May 19, 2008
The follow-up to Mortified is also good fun, but because the subject matter is more limited -- these entries are all of the "does he like me or like me like me" variety -- it eventually gets a bit repetitive. Still, worth reading if you happen to see it in the library or the bookstore.
July 18, 2008
I liked the concept more than I liked the book, but it was still fun. Some were predictable and did nothing for me. I would have liked it if there was more reflection. It did make me want to dig out my box of notes I still have from jr. high and high school. Although that could be that I'm just thinking of more ways to avoid writing.
May 21, 2009
Disappointing in comparison to the first Mortified. This wasn't bad, but I guess I preferred the all-around journal entries as opposed to forbidden/unrequited/unrealistic love over and over and over again. And really, there's only so many bad poems you can read before you want to spork your eyeball out.
Not horrible, still amusing, but nowhere near as recommendable as the first.
Not horrible, still amusing, but nowhere near as recommendable as the first.
April 13, 2013
I kept a diary through most of junior high and high school. While most entries consisted of how much I hated my small town and couldn't wait to leave, there were a few passionate entries about my celebrity crushes and dreams of my future with them. I saw a lot of myself in this book, which I don't know if I find embarrassing or hilarious. Either way, everyone grew up and turned out okay.
March 16, 2008
This was pretty funny. I liked the entries that were mixed with comments from "adult selves" better than ones that stood on their own. I wasn't a particularly angst-y teen so I didn't identify with many of the writers. Still, I got a kick out of reading about people's high school drama.
May 22, 2008
This book makes you feel better about everything you felt in high school. It's made up of people's real journal entries from when they were in high school. It's awesome! I need to read the first one now.
Currently reading
June 14, 2008Based on my love of the previous edition, I picked this one up. So far, I'm loving it. But I think I'll wait to read the rest until I have a gaggle of people over to laugh with me. Staged readings are the best for this book!
June 24, 2008
And you thought you were screwed up...well, join the club. This book is a funny, engaging look into the raw psyche of adolescence. I have performed in the live show, and I can unequivocally tell you the pieces are not rewritten or added too.
July 12, 2008
Meh. Moderately entertaining, but I suspect the compiler rather unambitiously simply tapped his pool of friends as a source. It would have been nice to have a wider cross-section of people. All the diary entries were pretty similar and reading them got monotonous.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews