Secret Language

by Monica Wood

Connie has trouble with time. She always has to stop and think a How old is she now? . . . Faith always seems to know, though her life is the same as Connie’ back and forth to theater towns all over. The same dingy food, the same noisy sidewalks, the same cramped suites in the same hotels. . . Sometimes they go to school, sometimes not, though they always have books to big packets of books that Armand sends to them in every city. Armand is their parents’ lawyer, the only person they know who likes children. . . .Faith and Connie endured the same childhood as daughters of egocentric, semi-famous actors who can scarcely take care of themselves. But the two sisters could not be more different. Connie learned to beg for attention, clamor for approval, and fill the silence with words. Faith turned inward, shrinking from the tender emotions that make up an ordinary life. Despite their differences, the sisters came to rely on each other exclusively. But lately, after years of quiet connection, Faith and Connie seem to have lost the ties that once held them close. Faith has a home and two growing sons, but is still unable to fathom unconditional love. Connie, a flight attendant, is always searching, ever-expecting to find her true place in life at the end of each long flight. But a series of shocking, revelatory events will bring the sisters back to each other—and forever alter how they define love, fulfillment, and most importantly, family.

Genres: Fiction

286 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 1993

About the author

Monica Wood is the author of four works of fiction, most recently The One-in-a-Million-Boy, which won a 2017 Nautilus Award (Gold) and the 2017 fiction prize from the New England Society in the City of New York. She also is the author of Any Bitter Thing which spent 21 weeks on the American Booksellers Association extended bestseller list and was named a Book Sense Top Ten pick. Her other fiction includes Ernie’s Ark and My Only Story, a finalist for the Kate Chopin Award.

Monica is also the author of When We Were the Kennedys, a memoir of her growing up in Mexico, Maine. The book won the Maine Literary Award for Memoir in 2013, and the Sarton Women's Literary Awards for Memoir in 2012.

Reviews

[Karina · Rating 3 out of 5]

Review to come— I enjoyed this one. Not my favorite but I love the way Monica Wood talks family and awkwardness. She’s a fantastic writer

[Carolyn Agosta · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had read Monica Wood's "My Only Story" years ago, and stumbled onto "Secret Language" only after also finding Ms. Wood's two Pocket Muse books (both are great!).

It's a sad story, of two sisters who come from a sad family, who grow up unable to really get past the barriers of communication, and yet come to realize they have their own form of communication. About halfway through, I wasn't sure I liked the story, it was so sad, and yet I felt compelled to keep reading - and I think the reason is this: I grew up in a family more like Faith's husband - loud, noisy, giving (although we have our snappish moments too!) - and I felt frustrated for Connie and Faith, that they couldn't become more like the Spauldings. But that was never the plan. What the book did, instead, was give me insight to a different kind of family, one for whom intimate moments were rare, but all the more meaningful for that. This is one of the things I love about reading - it can make me understand someone who I'd probably never understand otherwise, for the simple fact that this kind of person would never be able to open up to me.

One scene in particular really got to me. Faith has to assist her sister Connie, in intimate physical ways, after Connie is injured in an accident. My mother-in-law, age 100, does not speak English, and I've always been stymied in trying to communicate with her (her sons are not very helpful, they don't like to translate when the conversation gets personal or emotional). I had to bathe her once after after she had an 'accident'. I'm sure she was humiliated, but I had had to do things like this for MY mother, and we got through it - and strangely enough, that act actually, finally, after I'd been married to her son for 37 years, brought the two of us an emotional closeness we had never achieved before, without a single word of common language. Monica Wood put something like that into a story, so readers could comprehend even if they had never experienced anything like it in their own lives. And that's the kind of thing that makes this novel rich and makes it worth the read. You come to ache for these characters, but you can also get a new understanding of people in your own life.

Well done.

[Susan Emmet · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found Wood's novel engrossing and sad and alive with possibility. She is a gifted writer and I hope to read all she's written.
Faith and Constance, somewhat aptly named, endure a horrible childhood of rampant neglect, having been born to alcoholic parents whose attention is all self-directed. They only live on stage, romantic leads in musicals that go nowhere on Broadway - or anywhere else.
The daughters are so different in their reaction to neglect and both forge lives that appear to "work" until they don't. Poor Faith - unable to let herself be a full part of her husband's lively family and yet it's to Joe she returns, over and again.
Constance flies - and flies - until she returns to her sister for support and comfort. What a pair they are.
Wood's ability to craft structure around which character and plot flow is distinguished. I don't know why she's not more widely known or read. May that change!

[Natasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book by reading all the reviews from one particular reviewer on amazon who seemed to like a lot of the same books that I do. I picked it up from the library and started to read. I almost put it down after the first 25 pages. I thought it was going to be another depressing book about a rough childhood. It started out as just that, but the writing was so beautiful and the transformation of the sisters was so compelling that I couldn't put the book down. It is a short novel and is simply lovely. Through sparse writing Wood manages to convey such emotion and empathy that I was moved to tears more than once. I loved this book and Wood is on my favorite author list. Highly recommended.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5. Monica Wood does it again. I seem to be reading several books about sisters lately, and this is a novel that portrays siblings in all forms in ways that are familiar and real and often uncomfortable. The passages about childhood resonate, as Wood always seems to do with her writing. The story and craft, characters, setting, and pathways of the people and the story work in ways that feel effortless enough for me to understand — as a reader — that this took work. The best kind of work that results in a quiet story of humility and grace.

[Katrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was going to give this book four stars... but I couldn't come up with a single reason to take a star away. It is perfect, from beginning to end. There isn't a thing I would change. The characters are fascinating, well-developed and lovely. The joys and tragedies are easily felt right alongside them.

[Dianne · Rating 5 out of 5]

near my bed I have a shelf with my all time favorite books on it. I feel as though these books are my "friends" and are there for me if I should need an escape. Monica Woods book, "Secret Language," is one of the first books I ever put on that shelf. I sent away to the UK for it in hardback. If you are ever fortunate enough to come across a copy snatch it up and enjoy.

[Susan · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is my last Monica Wood book to read, except for the novella, A Woman in a Million, which doesn't seem to be available right now. Amazingly, this one is the least autobiographical and it's her debut! Very surprising. I was astonished when I started it, it seemed so unlike Monica Wood. Nevertheless, it drew me in, and while kind of depressing and definitely sad, I had to keep reading and find out how things turned out.
I came from a happy childhood, where I was taken care of and valued. So it has been hard for me to learn how much childhoods affect people in later life, but books like this one teach me, and I find it sort of appalling how much responsibility rests on parents. And ANYONE can be a parent, fit or not! It's totally Russian roulette whether you will get a good parent or not, and voila, your life is either off to a good start or nearly ruined.
This book is about two sisters, the daughters of self-absorbed actors. They are totally neglected, almost criminally so. Certainly emotionally. One of the girls comments that she feels angry, and I noted that in my mother's 12 yr old diary, that I read an undercurrent of anger. When asked, she said, "I know, I remember asking myself, Why do I feel so angry all the time?" The answer was that HER parents neglected her. They were a totally different situation than the actors in the story, certainly poorer, but they were in survival mode and didn't think about their children. While lavishly telling my mother they loved her so much, they never, in actuality, showed that. They never made sure she had meals, they never took her to the hospital after a bad fall and concussion, they never read her schoolwork, or her A+ writing, they never planned for her future, they never were interested in hearing what she thought, they never encouraged her talents. She was there to serve. Thank goodness, she didn't follow in her mother's footsteps with us! But it certainly affected her.
This story is my least favorite of all the Monica Woods, but it certainly has merit. It has a reasonably good ending. I was surprised all the way thru that it was Faith, the quiet, emotionally unavailable one that ended up marrying such a good man and having good boys, and Connie, the popular one, who ended up alone.
If you haven't read Monica Wood, who rivals Elizabeth Strout in my book, then please do! Start with When We Were the Kennedys, her memoir! It's genius!

[Ned Andrew Solomon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Monica Wood is an exceptional writer. Her memoir, When We Were the Kennedys, is one of the best memoirs I've ever read - and I have read many. A more recent book, The One-in-a-Million Boy, is a fantastic novel. Having read those two, I decided to venture into Wood's earlier works, and bought Secret Language.

The writing is flawless, and although not simplistic in any way, her prose goes down easy, as everything is spelled out in such fine and intricate detail. Which is, ironically, one of the problems I had with this book. Full of excellent dialogue, Wood can't help explaining what every character is feeling, instead of just letting the words breathe, and giving the reader credit for comprehending the characters' inner worlds. Too much exposition, and nothing left to chance, or a different interpretation.

That said - the story itself is outstanding, and all of the characters are appealing (well, except one - purposefully), even with their foibles.

[LindaJ^ · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read the hardback version of this edition, which is not (as so often happens now that GR restricts adding editions to librarians) listed under the book's editions.

Monica Wood has not written many books. This was her debut novel in 1993 and it is very good. It is in conventional/traditional novel form and very well done. Wood is great at bringing characters to life so that you feel how they feel. I don't find many authors who are skilled at doing that.

This book focuses on two sisters. Their parents, Billy and Delle, were stage actors who were in love with themselves and their acting and not with their children. The sisters, Faith and Constance, look like twins but there is a year and a half between them. There is no physical abuse here, just complete emotional abandonment by the parents. Rather unbelievably, their parents' lawyer Armand seems to be the only constant adult in their lives who acknowledges them and cares about them. He is the constant in their lives.

Billy dies first, in an single car automobile accident while driving drunk. Delle manages to hang on for a couple of years until the drink does her in. The girls, with Faith now 18, live on in the trailer and finish high school. Faith works in a doctor's office. Her future husband Joe Fuller Jr comes to see the doctor. He is smitten by Faith for reasons she finds hard to accept. She and Connie find his large family that is closely bonded almost impossible to believe and understand.

Connie becomes an airline attendant for AtlanticAir (think USAirways) whose regular routes are Boston to London or Paris. Faith and Joe have two boys. Faith remains working for the doctor and Joe at the family garage/dealership. All seems good but the Faith and Connie struggle mentally. Then a young woman writes them, claiming to be Billy's daughter -- the result of an affair Billy had with a dancer in Billy's and Delle's most famous show, one that was on Broadway for two years before Billy and Delle drank themselves out of the lead roles and the show failed.

I read this book in a day and a half. It was quite engrossing. I have read most of Wood's books and enjoyed them all, but my favorite is her memoir When We Were the Kennedys: A Memoir from Mexico, Maine, which reminds me of my own childhood in Maine.

[Richard · Rating 3 out of 5]

Having enjoyed two of Wood’s other novels recently, Any Bitter Thing and The One in a Million Boy, I decided to read Secret Language.

On the one hand, it has some impressive character development for a debut novel. The very different ways Faith and Connie develop as children to cope with being raised by two neglectful parents is depicted with a lot of insight. And the ways in which this affects their ability to nurture and tolerate intimacy each in her own way in their adult lives is equally well done. There is a conversation towards the end of the book which Faith has with her husband Joe about their relationship that is quietly poignant. Finally, the comfort which siblings can provide each other in their times of need over the course of their lives is skillfully portrayed in an understated kind of way.

On the other hand, I understand that an author introduces other characters to advance the development of his/her protagonists and/or to move the storyline along. But the use of Isadora to further expand on the challenges Faith and Connie face in their adult lives felt contrived. Even more so was an event which took place in Connie’s life about 2/3 of the way into the book. Other more credible incidents could have allowed the author to expound on the bond these two sisters shared with each other.

There is an interview with Wood at the end of SL which was quite informative. She explains how her own experiences with siblings growing up helped her understand the dynamics between Faith and Connie which she depicted. Additionally, her work as a guidance counselor before she became a writer and a brief career as a singer also informed other aspects of the novel.

[Paula Boyce · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved the writing in Secret Language, as I love the writing in all of Monica Wood's books, but this story did not engage me as much as the others. Faith and Connie are young daughters of Billy and Delle Spaulding, stage and theatre actors, who travel as a family from place to place as their shows debut in different American cities. Their parents were somewhat talented on stage, but were the worst parents ever, leaving their girls alone in hotel rooms, forgetting their birthdays, and sometimes enrolling them in school and sometimes not. The girls have only each other, but they are mostly silent and expect very little from life. Both parents, alcoholics, risk-takers, and emotionally shallow, die at a young age, forcing the girls into adulthood on their own. Faith and Connie take very different paths in life, but long for each other's company, even though they mostly remain silent. It's a sad, but hopeful story.

[Pamela Faust · Rating 4 out of 5]

Faith and Connie are two sisters who have an awful childhood. Their parents, Billy and Delle, are only in for looking like parents of proper girls. They are basically orphans that only have themselves to relate to. Faith has no ability to develop a relationship with her husband whose family loves both girls, too. Connie does develop a relationship with Stewart, but she’s still kind of leery of everyone else. When Isadora, their lost sister, comes in it’s very unsatisfactory because she’s a lot like Billy and Delle and only cares about her career. I did like the relationship that the lawyer tried to foster to make the girls feel better.

[Bob · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is so well written and sad and touching that its almost breaks your heart. It is about 2 sisters who grow up in the worst of situations with self absorbed Broadway bound parents and somehow survive to adulthood but not without some issues and pleasures. They somehow manage to find each other and some other surprises. I have enjoyed this as much as Any Bitter Thing, One and a Million Boy and her newest book, How to Read a Book. They are all so well written and so filled with kind people suffering and surviving and the feeling you get while reading her writing is so hard to describe other than these books deserve more praise. I can't say enough about her writing.

[Marcella Harper · Rating 4 out of 5]

Faith and Connie Spaulding grew up on the road with self-absorbed minstrel parents who often left them in the care of strangers. How ill prepared they felt trying to navigate a "normal" adulthood, each in her own way.

Monica Wood weaves a tale of contrasts between these women whose common silence says more than words can express. An unexpected half sister, a plane crash, and a surprise pregnancy challenge them each to grow beyond their habitual means of coping with the people in their lives.

A satisfying look at family relations and the ways in which our upbringings imprint our personalities.

[Jan · Rating 3 out of 5]

This story of the fallout of a dreary childhood is not a new theme, but it did have enough of a twist to make it successful. the characters are interesting, but do not quite make it in the authenticity department. I think if one character had been somewhat traditional, the other quirky character would have been more believable and relatable.

[Kerry Clair · Rating 3 out of 5]

Another exceptional read by this author. While I didn’t care for this one as much as other books by her… it was still a good read that I couldn’t wait to get back to. All of the characters were quite alien to me and their reactions and personalities so difficult to comprehend for me.

[JoAnn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

[Mary Crotty · Rating 3 out of 5]

okay - was a little pointless

[Carol Fuller · Rating 4 out of 5]

A bit heavy on sentimentality, but otherwise excellent.

[Deborah · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 for me. Great character development, but a bit slow.

[Michelle · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars I've read most of Monica Wood's books; this wasn't my favorite, but it was enjoyable and interesting to see how the characters developed.

[Angela · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was ok…she is a good writer. Just not one of her best. Growing up in a dysfunctional family with not an ounce of love….totally affected Faith and Constance for their entire lives.

[Susan Sepples · Rating 4 out of 5]

From Prince Memorial Library:

[Mom2nine · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have read all of Wood's books, and although it is my least favorite, it is worthy of four stars, showing that she is an excellent author.

[Jann · Rating 5 out of 5]

There is a Tolstoy quote, "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." which to me sums up this book. I have to thank Monica Wood's interviewer Debra Spark for using this in the Reader Guide in the book as I wouldn't have known of it otherwise. The story revolves around Faith and her younger sister Connie, the children of a couple of self-absorbed actors who virtually ignore their affection starved children. The only taste of love they have had is from their grandmother who dies when they were quite young and the kindness of their parent's lawyer who always remembers their birthdays. They don't even have the anchor of a stable home as they are taken from city to city across the country, living in a series of hotel rooms and their early schooling is frequently disrupted when a play's run ends and the family moves on. Even normal friendships are spoiled as they don't fit in with the other students when they do get to be enrolled at a school.
Eventually Faith and Connie are left to fend for themselves as their father dies and leaves them with their mother who spends her days in a drunken stupor and finally drinks herself to death. Connie has Faith for her comforting but Faith has to be self-sustaining as she puts them both through high-school. Faith eventually marries but finds herself unable to come out of her protective shell, thus being part of yet another unhappy family. Connie has her own way of concealing her damaged emotions as she goes through a series of love affairs and has a career as a flight attendant which mimics her early life without solid roots. Into their lives comes Isadora who wants to meet them as she claims to be their step-sister, the daughter of their father and a dancer from one of the shows he and their mother had been in. She is effusive but too needy, with nothing to give back in return for the acceptance she had hoped to find as she is a carbon copy of the egotistical character of their father.
The author uses beautiful phrasing with truly original similes which delighted me. In particular I liked this one where Connie says to Faith," "I thought I finally had a real sister," she murmurs, then freezes, horrified, but it's too late, her words are zig-zagging into the room like a let-go balloon."
I related to both Faith and Connie in many different ways. I could feel the pain of early childhood, as time after time they felt abandoned. I could empathise with the feeling of being lonely even when surrounded by family who are trying hard to make you feel welcomed. When Isadora turns out to be a user who wanted the connection to Faith and Connie to further her ambitions, Faith feels vindicated for having only grudgingly accepted her and Connie is stung to realise that the cosy relationship that had seemed possible with Isadora is merely a sham.
The other characters in their lives, Joe, Faith's husband, their two sons,Chris and Ben, Armand, the lawyer whose avuncular attentions have been constant, and Stewart, Connie's longtime platonic friend, play their supporting roles but ultimately it seems that, even though the sisters don't articulate their feelings toward each other, they are comfortable just being together without words.

[Lormac · Rating 3 out of 5]

Faith and Constance are the daughters of a couple of musical theater stars in the 1950s/1960s. To say they were bad parents would be understating the situation. But the abuse is not physical or sexual, or even emotional - it is simply complete and total neglect. The author would have the reader believe that the parents are so self-absorbed that they cannot take a single action that involves someone else.

The book is a narrative of how the parents' actions (or non-action, as it were) impacts the sisters throughout their lives - in their relationships with other people and their relationship with each other. To her credit, Wood really moves the story along; there is no point where the story starts to drag, and the characters are very well drawn. The sister bear certain similaritites in how they deal with life - they are both extremely neat and tidy - but they come at relationships in a different way, which gives the book its plotline. The supporting characters are fully-realized and add to the depth and richness of the story. Wood has the ability to break down a complex emotion into understandable words and actions.

Still, somehow, I had difficulty relating to the story, and I suspect it is because the parents are so one-note and the theater world they inhabited seems so unreal. When the sister finally have a breakthrough in their relationship, it seems somewhat anticlimatic after everything else they have been through.

To sum up, I would recommend this book, but it is not a masterpiece. I think nearly every reader will enjoy it and take something away from it because it is a well done story and deserving of attention, but it lacks something to make it a book I would return to.

[Jeanette (Ms. Feisty) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this entire book in one day! I don't know what it is about Monica Wood's writing. It just resonates with me.

At the beginning of the book I felt like she moved a little too quickly through the early lives of Faith and Constance, but then she slowed down when they reached adulthood. I didn't realize I'd become attached to the characters until later in the book when I found myself weeping.

This is the story of two girls who grew up with alcoholic, self-absorbed parents who were traveling actors. The parents dragged the girls along on their travels, and left them to fend for themselves. The bulk of the book shows how this upbringing affected their relationships and life choices after they were grown. The characters are lovable and amazingly well developed for such a short book(253 pages).

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

And so completes my quest to read everything Monica Wood has ever written. Though this still does not equal Any Bitter Thing (or Ernie's Ark) for me, it was still great. Her prose is among the best I've ever read, and I consider myself pretty well read! I especially enjoyed this as it's about two sisters, and I am a sister, and a mother to sisters. My sister and I (and hopefully my daughters) are much closer than Connie and Faith, but I appreciated the theme of "shared history," even if siblings are very different/not that close. The backdrop of the secondary characters (Armand, Faith's husband's family) was fantastic. Monica Wood definitely has a unique way of presenting relationships and revealing the complexities in them.

[Sherry · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reading her books for June author talk.
Book okay. Two very different, emotionally frozen, sisters, dragged around country by actor parents take care of each other. Quiet Faith works in dr's office, marries Joe, Is overwhelmed by his noisy, gregarious, effusive, caring family, has two sons, Chris and Ben, and divorces him after her remoteness drives him into another woman's arms. Vivacious, promiscuous Constance lives with Faith and Joe until she becomes a flight attendant, then keeping her own spotless condo. Neither has learned to love and give. Enter half sister Isadora, wanting family. Singer, actress grew up in loving family adopted by her step father as an infant. Isadora, a plane crash, digging thru trunks of parents stuff pulls them together and Faithn and Joe back together b