What do you think?
Rate this book
Real Men Don't Apologize
In this "guys guide to life," the star of the hit TV show According to Jim talks about how men can continue to be real men while still managing to make things work with the opposite sex Jim Belushi is a national celebrity who has starred in numerous movies as well as the current hit TV show airing on ABC, According to Jim . His "guy's guy" take on things led to a huge following among both men and women who cant get enough of Jim and his irrepressible take on life. Now he's sharing his unique perspective with a funny new book about dating, marriage, and sex that is sure to hit home with every redblooded American male and the women who love them. Any guy will relate to Belushi's self-discovered advice from the school of hard knocks. In character with his TV show, Belushi has strong opinions on how real men should act, and he relates his ideas with the trademark irreverent humor that has made him famous. Sample chapters from Real Men Dont Apologize! How to Be a Man
How to Get a Phone Number
Boot Camp for Men
Sex and the Single Man Over 18
and many more!
How to Get a Phone Number
Boot Camp for Men
Sex and the Single Man Over 18
and many more!
- GenresNonfictionHumorBiography
288 pages, Hardcover
First published May 1, 2005
11 people are currently reading
124 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
March 18, 2017
One of my favorite movies is called "Return to Me." It's a totally sappy chicfest but I LOVE it. James Belushi plays a hilarious supporting role. Because of that character, when I saw "Real Men Don't Apologize" in the $.25 bin, I picked it up. Unfortunately, Mr. Belushi's great on-screen humor does not translate well to a book.
I'm not sure for whom this book was written. From a woman's perspective, certainly not women! For men, I doubt his target male audience reads very much. That's not a judgement just an observation. My male reading friends are rarely into "Full Metal Jacket" analogies, bar fight arrests and Mike Ditka worship. I'm not disparaging any of that. I just think Mr. Belushi's book may have reached its target audience more effectively as a stand up routine.
Overall, this book was dissapointing and I think Mr. Belushi's wit is more suited for on-screen work.
I'm not sure for whom this book was written. From a woman's perspective, certainly not women! For men, I doubt his target male audience reads very much. That's not a judgement just an observation. My male reading friends are rarely into "Full Metal Jacket" analogies, bar fight arrests and Mike Ditka worship. I'm not disparaging any of that. I just think Mr. Belushi's book may have reached its target audience more effectively as a stand up routine.
Overall, this book was dissapointing and I think Mr. Belushi's wit is more suited for on-screen work.
September 24, 2015
This book is a sort of like a self-help book on how to become a better man. Why an 18 year old girl such as myself read it? I honestly don't know. But I have to say, no regrets on that one. It's funny, and interesting. It's sort of like having a conversation with a guy friend of yours who had too much beer.
Sure, there were certain parts that generalized women, but he's a guy. What does he know about us girls?
Also, it has some wise words in it. My favorite in particular is, "Beer is your friend."
No truer words have ever been spoken.
Sure, there were certain parts that generalized women, but he's a guy. What does he know about us girls?
Also, it has some wise words in it. My favorite in particular is, "Beer is your friend."
No truer words have ever been spoken.
November 24, 2014
I read this book because it was a gift and I said I would read it. So I read it.
Also, I like to read an easy book to get back into the swing of reading. You know, after you haven`t read anything for a while.
With all that being said, this book was horrible. I knew it from the second I saw it. Jim Belushi isn't the worst or anything, but he kind of is.
Knowing nothing of the book I assumed it would be some sort of stand-up routine hashed into a book that would end up being funny at some point. Even if by accident. Again, not a Belushi fan, not of his brother really either, but every comedian has some good material tucked away somewhere.
Well, as it turns out, this is not a comedy book. It's relationship advice from Jim Belushi. You read that right. Jim Belushi giving relationship advice. As though anyone anywhere in time or space has every asked what Jim Belushi would suggest in very particularly dating scenarios. It makes me angry that I know of this book's existence and I'm now compelled to do something horrible to this book. I probably won't do anything to the book, but that's more so because it was a gift. I'll give it away. To the garbage. Or leave it on the subway. I'll do that. No, there's some communal library around the corner on some dude's front lawn. I'll put it in there. Better yet, I'll go about living my life hoping I forget about this unpleasant experience all together.
If you've read this far I commend you. You've gotten more out of my review then Jim Belushi has out of any relationship he's ever been in. Message me to dump on Belushi. Why you ask? Well if you're asking that you haven't read this book. Which would explain why you're reading this review. ...Sort of. Have you seen According to Jim? It is bad. So is this book.
What I'm saying is Jim Belushi is not for me. Or anyone I know for that matter. Or for you. Probably.
Also, I like to read an easy book to get back into the swing of reading. You know, after you haven`t read anything for a while.
With all that being said, this book was horrible. I knew it from the second I saw it. Jim Belushi isn't the worst or anything, but he kind of is.
Knowing nothing of the book I assumed it would be some sort of stand-up routine hashed into a book that would end up being funny at some point. Even if by accident. Again, not a Belushi fan, not of his brother really either, but every comedian has some good material tucked away somewhere.
Well, as it turns out, this is not a comedy book. It's relationship advice from Jim Belushi. You read that right. Jim Belushi giving relationship advice. As though anyone anywhere in time or space has every asked what Jim Belushi would suggest in very particularly dating scenarios. It makes me angry that I know of this book's existence and I'm now compelled to do something horrible to this book. I probably won't do anything to the book, but that's more so because it was a gift. I'll give it away. To the garbage. Or leave it on the subway. I'll do that. No, there's some communal library around the corner on some dude's front lawn. I'll put it in there. Better yet, I'll go about living my life hoping I forget about this unpleasant experience all together.
If you've read this far I commend you. You've gotten more out of my review then Jim Belushi has out of any relationship he's ever been in. Message me to dump on Belushi. Why you ask? Well if you're asking that you haven't read this book. Which would explain why you're reading this review. ...Sort of. Have you seen According to Jim? It is bad. So is this book.
What I'm saying is Jim Belushi is not for me. Or anyone I know for that matter. Or for you. Probably.
March 12, 2010
I listened to this on audio with Mr. Belushi reading. I may have to turn in my feminist card, but I enjoyed this book. Jim Belushi gives advice to men on relationships and how to be men. Very funny with serious overtones. Built on the experience of failed marriages and relationships (and with a currently successful marriage), the book is funny, interesting, and sometimes illuminating. Guys could probably get worse advice, and women could be treated less respectfully. Not sure how it reads as a book, but the audio was fun.
May 8, 2020
The author is a comedian so it is hard to judge whether his advice on relationships is serious or in jest. However, as Shakespeare said, many a truth is spoken in jest. His opinions appear to come from 1950s or earlier. Maybe the stone age. As I said, I share many of his opinions, but I will not state which. The notion that there are any differences between the sexes, is as you know, unfashionable today. For daring, I give this three stars. And it made me laugh. At which sections I will not say.
August 3, 2016
Loved it! Mr. Belushi is a very funny guy and I've enjoyed any movie or tv show I've seen him in so far....of course I loved his book too! His sense of humor is down to earth, and I'd like to see him write more, since he's not really putting much out on the "boob tube" or silver screen! I can guarantee if you love Belushi's sense of humor, you'll love this book too! :-D
June 25, 2021
Oh, toxic masculinity! It never truly goes out of style or goes away—like cockroaches, mullets, bellbottoms and plaid kilts, it pops up just when you think social awareness has destroyed.
Published in 2006, Mr. Belushi celebrates this in all its hairy-chested glory. Real men drink and drink beer. Real men love meat, sports and porn. Talking about your feelings, being rational during an argument, letting her have the remote? Uh uh, not if you want to be a real man!
To give you an idea of how low Jim Belushi sets the bar for manhood, here is an idea of his ultimate man, his friend Stevie B (a character that I desperately hope is fictional). Stevie B owns a chain of rib joints, once tried to pick a fight with Muhammed Ali and had a ménage à trois in a 747 lavatory. Those actions, to Mr. Belushi, makes Stevie B the ne plus ultra of manhood.
Do I even need to state how he feels about women? Well, let’s start off with the fact that he calls them “chicks”. He sees them as opponents, scorns the notion that women have ever been oppressed or held back by men and subtly implies that giving them the vote has resulted in subsequent disaster after disaster for the United States. (The latter is simply a boring reiteration of the myth of Eve being responsible or all the evil that befell the world so it fails as humor and diatribe.)
Of course, like any guy thinly cloaking his chauvinism with bonhomie, he includes chapters on how to get women in the sack. From using the 3:1:4 formula to get their numbers to colorful sports metaphors for sexual situations and positions, Mr. Belushi leaves no slimy stone unturned.
But wait! It gets worse! The book takes a dark turn as the author outlines horrible tricks to keep a woman off balance and to get her off his territory. He calls one of the latter The Big Toe Theory. IF a woman places a metaphorical toe in the guy’s territory, he has to strike back hard, at once, to get her to back off. It doesn’t mean actual hitting, of course. He recommends playful antics like stomping around, yelling, throwing things, making an uproar.
Every few weeks, he should stage a jealous scene: smashing an item, accusing her of enticing other men, screaming at her, e.g. this will make the woman think he’s not taking her for granted. Yes, let’s use ugly, terrifying, violent scenes of masculine rage to hold the relationship together! Isn’t this fun!
Mr. Belushi swears this isn’t mean or abusive. But that’s the problem—it is. Read Lundy Bancroft’s book Why Does He Do That? and he lists exact behavior like this as being among the repertoire of abusers. Mr. Belushi recommends Mind Games to keep her on her toes; abusers regularly gaslight their partners to win arguments and fill women’s minds with crippling anxiety and self-doubt.
Mr. Belushi eventually gets around to mentioning amorous love and the prospect of marriage. However, it should surprise no one that both these subjects arrive in the narrow, tail-end of the book. It involves a marriage proposal he made to his (third) wife in Maui and what he thinks is the Final Test for a prospective bridegroom: getting into an improvised boxing match with half a dozen best friends in the middle of the woods. Why bother with a bachelor party with strippers when you can substitute a hazing ritual straight out of a scary movie? Ah, manhood!
In the end (and I do mean the end; Mr. Belushi includes a conclusion at the behest of his editor), the best outcome a man can hope for from a woman is a smart one who loves him for who he is and leaves him alone. I think I’m a smart woman and, if I ever encounter a man who behaves according to the precepts of this book, I’ll leave him alone—because I wouldn’t touch him with a 12-foot cattle prod.
Published in 2006, Mr. Belushi celebrates this in all its hairy-chested glory. Real men drink and drink beer. Real men love meat, sports and porn. Talking about your feelings, being rational during an argument, letting her have the remote? Uh uh, not if you want to be a real man!
To give you an idea of how low Jim Belushi sets the bar for manhood, here is an idea of his ultimate man, his friend Stevie B (a character that I desperately hope is fictional). Stevie B owns a chain of rib joints, once tried to pick a fight with Muhammed Ali and had a ménage à trois in a 747 lavatory. Those actions, to Mr. Belushi, makes Stevie B the ne plus ultra of manhood.
Do I even need to state how he feels about women? Well, let’s start off with the fact that he calls them “chicks”. He sees them as opponents, scorns the notion that women have ever been oppressed or held back by men and subtly implies that giving them the vote has resulted in subsequent disaster after disaster for the United States. (The latter is simply a boring reiteration of the myth of Eve being responsible or all the evil that befell the world so it fails as humor and diatribe.)
Of course, like any guy thinly cloaking his chauvinism with bonhomie, he includes chapters on how to get women in the sack. From using the 3:1:4 formula to get their numbers to colorful sports metaphors for sexual situations and positions, Mr. Belushi leaves no slimy stone unturned.
But wait! It gets worse! The book takes a dark turn as the author outlines horrible tricks to keep a woman off balance and to get her off his territory. He calls one of the latter The Big Toe Theory. IF a woman places a metaphorical toe in the guy’s territory, he has to strike back hard, at once, to get her to back off. It doesn’t mean actual hitting, of course. He recommends playful antics like stomping around, yelling, throwing things, making an uproar.
Every few weeks, he should stage a jealous scene: smashing an item, accusing her of enticing other men, screaming at her, e.g. this will make the woman think he’s not taking her for granted. Yes, let’s use ugly, terrifying, violent scenes of masculine rage to hold the relationship together! Isn’t this fun!
Mr. Belushi swears this isn’t mean or abusive. But that’s the problem—it is. Read Lundy Bancroft’s book Why Does He Do That? and he lists exact behavior like this as being among the repertoire of abusers. Mr. Belushi recommends Mind Games to keep her on her toes; abusers regularly gaslight their partners to win arguments and fill women’s minds with crippling anxiety and self-doubt.
Mr. Belushi eventually gets around to mentioning amorous love and the prospect of marriage. However, it should surprise no one that both these subjects arrive in the narrow, tail-end of the book. It involves a marriage proposal he made to his (third) wife in Maui and what he thinks is the Final Test for a prospective bridegroom: getting into an improvised boxing match with half a dozen best friends in the middle of the woods. Why bother with a bachelor party with strippers when you can substitute a hazing ritual straight out of a scary movie? Ah, manhood!
In the end (and I do mean the end; Mr. Belushi includes a conclusion at the behest of his editor), the best outcome a man can hope for from a woman is a smart one who loves him for who he is and leaves him alone. I think I’m a smart woman and, if I ever encounter a man who behaves according to the precepts of this book, I’ll leave him alone—because I wouldn’t touch him with a 12-foot cattle prod.
January 31, 2025
Genuinely one of the worst books I've ever read. Most of the book was senseless dribble that made me feel disgusting as a man. My friends and I would discuss whether or not this was satire, and I'm still unsure. Because once and a while, he'd make a lucid and real piece of advice on being a better man. But for the most part, it's nearly 300 pages of horrible stereotypes of what a man should be. I felt gross reading it, the jokes weren't funny, and it was generally terrible prose.
August 31, 2025
This is a self help book. It’s about trying/wanting a romantic relationship between a man & woman.
November 14, 2015
From the first chapter, I had a very hard time putting this book down. I don't read a lot of non-fiction, but was quite pleased to find that I loved this book. Men will highly enjoy both the humor and the truth in these pages. Now, if you are a woman, this book could also be interesting to you as it will let you in on the way men think.
Although I didn't agree 100 percent with Jim Belushi on every word in the book, I did agree with him most of the time. Will I take a lot of what I learned in the book and apply it to my life? Damn straight I will.
Even though we learn best from our own mistakes, it is always helpful, and less painful, to learn from another's. Jim has made a lot of mistakes in his life . . . but haven't we all.
So, if you are looking for some advice on being a man, getting the woman you want, losing the wrong woman that you have, and living a happy life, Real Men Don't Lie by Jim Belushi is the best book around. Plus, you will find yourself laughing out loud at Jim's audacious writing style.
Way to go Jim, this is quite a book and should be on every man's book shelf.
I rated this book a 9½ out of 10.
Although I didn't agree 100 percent with Jim Belushi on every word in the book, I did agree with him most of the time. Will I take a lot of what I learned in the book and apply it to my life? Damn straight I will.
Even though we learn best from our own mistakes, it is always helpful, and less painful, to learn from another's. Jim has made a lot of mistakes in his life . . . but haven't we all.
So, if you are looking for some advice on being a man, getting the woman you want, losing the wrong woman that you have, and living a happy life, Real Men Don't Lie by Jim Belushi is the best book around. Plus, you will find yourself laughing out loud at Jim's audacious writing style.
Way to go Jim, this is quite a book and should be on every man's book shelf.
I rated this book a 9½ out of 10.
February 11, 2008
I note that when this came out in paperback, the title changed. There were some great points that combated the "wussification" of America in the first half of the book, but then it turned into just another guide to getting and scoring with the opposite sex. That wasn't funny, it wasn't useful, and it was boring.
March 28, 2009
I was excited to read this book because i find his humor hilarious on According to Jim. However the book wasn't about what I imagined it to be. Even the quotes on the back cover hinted it'd be more about his marriage and observations that he has through out the TV show. Rather, it's just a self-help guide for guys to get chicks. That's unfortunate.
March 25, 2016
This book was very much like Jim Belushi and his comedy, a lot silly, a lot off the wall and a little moveable. Have always thought he was way more talented than his brother, who never made me laugh. Jim is more real and down to earth and a lot less mean in his comedy than John. If you like Jim you may like the book, it's very Jim.
April 28, 2008
not as funny as I expected it to be
October 27, 2010
I couldn't finish this book. I tried. I hate not finishing a booik; but I just couldn't get into it. It had a couple of funny spots, but overall I just couldn't read it.
October 6, 2009
I hate to even admit I read this. It had a few funny lines, but not nearly enough for the investment. It was free and I still feel like I paid too much.
March 20, 2020
My refresher reading of this book.. While it's somewhat dated,it's still essential reading or listening for "nice guys" and for those men who have never experienced a men's circle..
August 8, 2012
It was so funny I couldn't put it down ,and I'm a woman! ;)
Read
March 17, 2014GREAT BOOK JUST AMAZING
March 1, 2014
I read it because I received it as an Xmas gift. I didn't find it very funny or useful. I flunked the Man Test at the beginning, so there you go.
Want to read
October 3, 2014Belushi needs to stick to TV. I can't even finish this book it's so awful.
June 12, 2015
Enjoyed this book but it was very much a stand-up routine. This was not a surprise but I was hoping for some deeper insights. If you like Jim Belushi it won't disappoint but it also won't thrill.
January 22, 2019
Absolutely hysterical!
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews