Carvings

by John Snellings

Four statues carved from the diseased wood of a graveyard tree begin a rampage of terror when they are finally unearthed and their lust for destruction is unleashed.

Genres: Horror

397 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published March 1, 1987

Reviews

[Jack Tripper · Rating 3 out of 5]

The next time you feel like taking a break from Kierkegaard or Schopenhauer and you're in the mood for a thought-provoking read about murderous little wooden voodoo statues who like to disembowel anyone in their path using their teeth and razor sharp claws, try this one out.

As usual with 1980s Leisure (and Zebra) titles, it's way too long, with continuity errors galore, and goes into excruciating detail on the day to day lives of the townsfolk, many of whom exist solely to be ripped limb from limb within pages of being introduced. Still, it's good trashy fun for the most part, thanks to the gruesome kills, which are pretty plentiful -- more so if you're adept at skim-reading.

Overall, a powerful and moving novel that imparts an important message on the fragility of human life in a world where wood carvings want you dead. It pulls at your heartstrings while also forcing you to ponder life's big questions.*



*No, not really.

[Warren Fournier · Rating 3 out of 5]

If you are like me and share a passion for collecting old books, actually reading them, and then spreading the word about your experience to encourage new audiences, this review is for you. Books like this are paper magic that fits in your pocket, and once were a primay way of getting people to read who would otherwise never pick up a novel, let alone one as long as the book we are reviewing today. And they made lifelong horror and science fiction fans of people like me. We also have these books to thank for inspiring some of our greatest contemporary genre writers today, such as Grady Hendricks, Adam Cesare, Johnathan Jans, and many others. So does "Carvings" live up to the timeless legacy of paperbacks from hell?

This is a 1986 cash-in on the little monsters craze brought about by the film "Gremlins" in 1984. It was written by John Snellings and brought to us by our old friends at Lesiure Publishing. I can't find any info on the author, but I'm assuming he was a real person, and it looks like the only other book to be published under that name is a nautical adventure from 2020. But the imprint needs no introduction. This is classic Leisure Horror. Sporting one of the more iconic and beautiful embossed cover designs, this out-of-print book is a joy to run your fingers over, and the visual textures are even more stunning, from the metal trim on the ancient box to the ornate backrest behind the centerpiece character with cornsilk hair.

The main plot concerns four wooden statues, described in such a way as to lead me to think they were inspired by the fetish doll in the movie "Trilogy of Terror." And yes, they come to life and start murdering people. Our "Bob" of the story actually has quite a cool name (Warren), and he's the sheriff of the small town where the sadistic statues are running loose. Can he and his trusted deputies make mulch of the wooden beasties before it's too late?

Let's first discuss the positives. Most of the cast doesn't survive long, but while they're around, I enjoyed them. Also, I liked how self-aware the story is regarding the horror novel craze of the time, and tries to justify its own existence by pointing out that old scientific romances were once considered ridiculous fantasies but prepared people for the incredible reality of today. As much as that may be a stretch, this book certainly captures the lighthearted but meanspirited tone that vintage paperback lovers crave. When it delivers the goods, the book is not shy, assaulting the senses with some of the most blood-soaked and brutal kills I've yet encountered from horror fiction of the decade. And no character is off limits for a gruesome demise.

The issue for me, which seems to have been shared by fellow readers, is that the book did not earn its 397 pages. This is an unfortunate miscalculation for many horror authors of the period, and some would argue that Stephen King is among them. A lot of time is spent giving intricate details of the inner life of multiple characters. This is fine if you are going for a complex drama. But when you build up a character, not to contribute to the story, but only to pad out the kill count, that's when folks tend to cry foul.

Compared to some of my fellow horror aficionados, I tend to be a little more forgiving of this practice, especially when the prose is solid. And in the case of "Carvings," the author does have a gift for the little details that can engage a reader with a character instantly. But way too much time is spent mulling over mundane things. Why would an author with such a talent for conveying so much with so little draw things out?

Therein lies the problem. This is an obvious case of padding. I'm sure you could argue that the author was trying to add emotional weight to every death by letting the reader get to know the characters first. But he actually didn't allow for any true development of character at all. There were just too many of them. They couldn't be integrated in any meaningful way into the plot so that sympathy could be generated organically as the story progressed. So the book reads episodically--a series of painfully dull descriptions of a person's day ended with them getting shredded to pieces. Sheriff investigates. Then we move on to the next one. Thirty pages until the end, he's still introducing new characters and going on and on with them. At this point I was skipping whole chapters because I could care less about anyone brought in this late in the game. The narrative frame would have worked better with less characters, more time for development, and not having them usually die in the same chapter they are introduced, saving the high stakes carnage for a longer and more nail-biting finale.

As it stands, for all the time it took to get to the ending, somehow the book felt rushed. It's as if the author misunderstood that Leisure Publishing meant you published at your leisure. I imagine him tooling around for a few months while writing this in his flannel pajamas, playing with the dog, drinking a few beers to disinhibit the writer's block, enjoying the process of adding little character traits here and there, all without really have a solid full thread for a narrative arc. Then his publisher wakes him up from an afternoon nap with an angry phone call:

"Snellings! Aren't you finished with that book yet?! You've got until noon tomorrow to get me a final draft, you hear? Noon tomorrow!"

Thus we never see another horror novel under the name John Snellings again, and what we are left with is a book that drifts around, full of editorial mistakes, and which gets phoned in at the very last minute.

So beyond a beautiful cover to add to your vintage collection, is this book actually worth reading? Well, if you are the target audience, yes. It doesn't necessarily add anything new to the genre, but it knowingly basks in violent cheesy kitsch in a very satisfying way. My only bit of advice is to skim, which I normally don't endorse, but in this case, it works perfectly fine.

In conclusion, this is not the most stellar paperback from hell, but it is a classic example that gets a lot right. If you are a vintage book lover and were considering grabbing this title from an online seller, I'd say go for it. As of the time of this review, "Carvings" is not a rare find and still inexpensive.

SCORE: Three evil dolls

[Christine · Rating 4 out of 5]

One day, Harold Tackett finds an old mysterious box buried at a job site. He keeps it secret from everyone and waits excitedly all day for a moment of privacy in which to finally open it. He is very disappointed to find only four carved wooden statues inside, instead of the wealth of riches he originally imagined. It only takes minutes for him to realize his mistake - that the box was buried and covered in warning symbols for a good reason - and just like that the statues, with their huge claws and razor sharp teeth are upon him. His wife finds him shortly after and meets the same fate.
As the statues continue to terrorize and mutilate everyone, the police are baffled at what is going on in their small, quiet town, which rarely sees any action or crime. Despite what the attacks look like, the police are convinced they are not animal in nature. The sheriff has a hunch the large box found at the Hackett's, covered in satanic markings has something to do with what's going on, but can't figure out what the link is.
The sheriff tries asking one of the oldest citizens, a man who is said to know everything about the town. He learns the box came from the backyard of a man who practiced voodoo.
"Some said he could look at you and hold you in a trance. And if he stared at you long enough, he could steal your soul. Just zap it right out of you. And he'd use your soul to bring those wooden things to life."
"What wooden things?"
"Those things he made. Statues I guess you'd call them. He carved them out of big tree limbs. From what I understand, the old guy cut down a tree in the cemetery. Said the wood holds special powers because the roots thrived on the dead."
Despite his disbelief, eventually the sheriff has no choice but to believe the insane story - especially after the confirmation he gets as more and more townsfolk witness the statues - and from the first and only survivor of these attacks. But how do you stop wooden statues?
--------------------
I really liked this book, especially at first. As it progressed it focused a lot more on the police and solving the crime. Also there are wayyyyy too many characters to even try to keep track of - who are just introduced to die. It needed an editor and the ending was SO abrupt I thought pages were missing. But all in all, I enjoyed it and it's worth a read.

[Jim Lay · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had this book in my collection for years and was intrigued by the b-movie plot summary and the fact that the author was also from Knoxville, TN.
I finally read it and found it to be an entertaining b-movie kind of horror novel. Hardly great, mind you, but amusing like a Sci Fi Channel original movie can be sometimes.
Summary: Dude finds old box buried on a construction site. Dude opens box hoping for treasure. Dude finds several creepy statues carved from wood. Statues come to life, kill dude, then go on a long killing spree in the town, killing indiscriminately. A chain-smoking sheriff is on the case. That pretty much sums it up.

[Snood · Rating 2 out of 5]

Bob and Jane are a loving couple. They have some marital issues, but who doesn't? By golly, they love each other. Oh no, the statues killed them! Somebody discovers the body and almost throws up. Sheriff Warren visits the scene, wonders what could have done this, and finds a thorn. About a dozen cigarettes are lit and stubbed out in the process... THIS IS AT LEAST HALF OF THE BOOK.

Snellings is a fine character writer and his descriptions are nice, but his pacing and structure are atrocious. I wasn't aware a book could be both padded and rushed, but Carvings managed it. There are six entire chapters dedicated to establishing characters who almost immediately die without impacting the plot beyond being victims and the climax is only about ten pages long. Several questions are left totally unanswered because the author couldn't explain why the statues were murderers and what their relationship with Jarvis Taylor was in 400 pages.

He must not have had an editor either, since there are more errors here than many independent books. "Sudenly", "unbrella", "going to be along wait", "loosing blood", "huband". It changes from morning to bedtime to morning within a single scene. Linda Miller is renamed Linda Underwood for no explained reason.

[DJMikeG · Rating 3 out of 5]

Goofy, not great, but hits some of those easy to scratch 80s horror boom itches. This novel, like alot of novels from the horror boom, suffers from bloat, I'd say there's a much better 300 page horror novel within this tome's flabby 400 pages. The conclusion leaves alot to be desired. I had a bad feeling when the book was just kind of plodding along with 20 pages left. No real build up, it just wraps everything up in the last few pages. That said, who can resist a book about little wooden carvings killing people in rural North Carolina? Its easily as good as "Ghoulies 2".

[Ed Aycock · Rating 1 out of 5]

Bad. It's as though the writer was given a word count and couldn't go beyond that because the book just ends. No real satisfactory explanations given for what was causing these evil carvings to go on a rampage.

Not that the book was great until that point. Long, slow boring periods of dialogue between cardboard characters getting killed the exact same way every time. Best part of the book was the cover which seems to have been used only because it kinda sorta fits the general idea of the story.

[Kinkyclawz · Rating 5 out of 5]

People are being murdered in gruesome and mysterious circumstances in a remote American town and the only clues to the deaths are a large wooden box, tiny barbs found all over the murder scenes and a local legend.

A well written (if slightly predictable in places) horror story. Its quite gory and unsettling but a great credit to John Snellings' talent.