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ما تحتاجه لتكون سعيدًا
لقد بحثت المؤلفة كثيرًا في مفهوم السعادة، حتى تم تصنيفها كواحدة من أهم المتخصصين في دراسة السعادة وأثرها على الإنسان، وفي رحلة البحث تلك، اكتشَفت حقائق نعرضها من خلال هذا الكتاب، مثل:
• ما هو المستوى المسموح لكل إنسان من السعادة؟
• حل الـ40% المبتكر للتحكم في المستوى المسموح لك من السعادة!
• 5 عوامل أساسية لبدء المسار الصحيح نحو سعادة دائمة!
• 12 نشاطًا وطريقة عملية مُجربة على مناحي الحياة المختلفة لبلوغ مستويات أعلى من السعادة والرخاء.
بالاعتماد على أبحاث ودراسات خاصة على الآلاف من الرجال والنساء، استطاعت عالمة النفس سونيا ليوبوميرسكي ابتكار خُطَّة خاصَّة ناجحة لبلوغ السعادة على المدى القصير، وذلك من خلال فَهْم العوامل الصحيحة التي تمنحنا هذا الشعور.. وما إذا كان الشعور حقيقيًّا أم مزيفًا..
في هذا الكتاب.. تُرى ما مدى قدرتنا على التحكم في تغيير نمط الحياة؟ هل السعادة مرهونة بالظروف وطبيعة الحياة العاطفية والاجتماعية والمادية؟ وهل تتعلق السعادة بالوراثة العائلية والجينات؟
كلها أمور عليك أن تفهمها أولًا، قبل خوض أي تَجْرِبَة نحو تعزيز شعورك بالسعادة..
تقدم المؤلفة اختبارًا تشخيصيًّا قصيرًا يساعد القراء على تحديد مستوى سعادتهم أولًا، ثم تكشف عن النقطة التي يمكنك البدء من عندها، مهما كانت ظروف حياتك والتحديات التي مررت بها.. حتى تخرج بأقصى استفادة ووعي وإدراك ممكن لسبل السعادة من حولك، وتصبح أكثر تقديرًا للحياة.
• ما هو المستوى المسموح لكل إنسان من السعادة؟
• حل الـ40% المبتكر للتحكم في المستوى المسموح لك من السعادة!
• 5 عوامل أساسية لبدء المسار الصحيح نحو سعادة دائمة!
• 12 نشاطًا وطريقة عملية مُجربة على مناحي الحياة المختلفة لبلوغ مستويات أعلى من السعادة والرخاء.
بالاعتماد على أبحاث ودراسات خاصة على الآلاف من الرجال والنساء، استطاعت عالمة النفس سونيا ليوبوميرسكي ابتكار خُطَّة خاصَّة ناجحة لبلوغ السعادة على المدى القصير، وذلك من خلال فَهْم العوامل الصحيحة التي تمنحنا هذا الشعور.. وما إذا كان الشعور حقيقيًّا أم مزيفًا..
في هذا الكتاب.. تُرى ما مدى قدرتنا على التحكم في تغيير نمط الحياة؟ هل السعادة مرهونة بالظروف وطبيعة الحياة العاطفية والاجتماعية والمادية؟ وهل تتعلق السعادة بالوراثة العائلية والجينات؟
كلها أمور عليك أن تفهمها أولًا، قبل خوض أي تَجْرِبَة نحو تعزيز شعورك بالسعادة..
تقدم المؤلفة اختبارًا تشخيصيًّا قصيرًا يساعد القراء على تحديد مستوى سعادتهم أولًا، ثم تكشف عن النقطة التي يمكنك البدء من عندها، مهما كانت ظروف حياتك والتحديات التي مررت بها.. حتى تخرج بأقصى استفادة ووعي وإدراك ممكن لسبل السعادة من حولك، وتصبح أكثر تقديرًا للحياة.
400 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2007
1456 people are currently reading
21282 people want to read
About the author
Sonja Lyubomirsky
14 books240 followersThe majority of my research career has been devoted to studying human happiness. Why is the scientific study of happiness important? In short, because most people believe that happiness is meaningful, desirable, and an important, worthy goal, because happiness is one of the most salient and significant dimensions of human experience and emotional life, because happiness yields numerous rewards for the individual, and because it makes for a better, healthier, stronger society. Along these lines, my current research addresses three critical questions: 1) What makes people happy?; 2) Is happiness a good thing?; and 3) How and why can people learn to lead happier and more flourishing lives?
Why Are Some People Happier Than Others?
I have always been struck by the capacity of some individuals to be remarkably happy, even in the face of stress, trauma, or adversity. Thus, my earlier research efforts had been focused on trying to understand why some people are happier than others (for a review and theoretical framework, see Lyubomirsky, 2001). To this end, my approach had been to explore the cognitive and motivational processes that distinguish individuals who show exceptionally high and low levels of happiness. These processes include social comparison (how people compare themselves to peers), dissonance reduction (how people justify both trivial and important choices in their lives), self-evaluation (how people judge themselves), and person perception (how people think about others). All of these processes, it turns out, have hedonic implications – that is, positive or negative consequences for happiness and self-regard – and thus are relevant to elucidating individual differences in enduring well-being. My students and I have found that truly happy individuals construe life events and daily situations in ways that seem to maintain their happiness, while unhappy individuals construe experiences in ways that seem to reinforce unhappiness. In essence, our research shows that happy individuals experience and react to events and circumstances in relatively more positive and more adaptive ways. For a recent example, we found that happy individuals are relatively more likely than their less happy peers to “endow” positive memories (i.e., store them in their emotional “bank ACCOUNTS”) but to “contrast” negative memories (i.e., “life is so much better now”) (Liberman, Boehm, Lyubomirsky, & Ross, 2011).
On-going studies in my laboratory are exploring additional cognitive and motivational processes that support the differing worlds of enduring happiness versus chronic unhappiness. For example, several investigations have revealed that unhappy individuals are more likely than happy ones to dwell on negative or ambiguous events (Lyubomirsky, Boehm, Kasri, & Zehm, 2011). Such “dwelling” or rumination may drain cognitive resources and thus bring to bear a variety of negative consequences, which could further reinforce unhappiness. These findings demonstrate some of the maladaptive by-products of self-reflection, suggesting that not only is the “unexamined life” worth living, but it is potentially full of happiness and joy.
To cast our work on happiness in a broader framework, we have also been exploring the meaning, expression, and pursuit of happiness across cultures, subcultures, and age groups (e.g., Boehm, Lyubomirsky, & Sheldon, 2011). For example, despite media reports, we have found that parents actually experience more happiness and meaning than do non-parents–both when evaluating their lives as a whole, when going about their days, and when caring for their children (versus doing other ACTIVITIES; Nelson, Kushlev, English, Dunn, & Lyubomirsky, 2013). Of course, parents’ happiness is impacted by myriad factors, including their age and SES and their children’s ages and temperaments (Nelson, Kushlev, & Lyubomirsky, in press). Furthermore, we are currently carrying out happiness-increasing interventions among Japanese engineers,
Why Are Some People Happier Than Others?
I have always been struck by the capacity of some individuals to be remarkably happy, even in the face of stress, trauma, or adversity. Thus, my earlier research efforts had been focused on trying to understand why some people are happier than others (for a review and theoretical framework, see Lyubomirsky, 2001). To this end, my approach had been to explore the cognitive and motivational processes that distinguish individuals who show exceptionally high and low levels of happiness. These processes include social comparison (how people compare themselves to peers), dissonance reduction (how people justify both trivial and important choices in their lives), self-evaluation (how people judge themselves), and person perception (how people think about others). All of these processes, it turns out, have hedonic implications – that is, positive or negative consequences for happiness and self-regard – and thus are relevant to elucidating individual differences in enduring well-being. My students and I have found that truly happy individuals construe life events and daily situations in ways that seem to maintain their happiness, while unhappy individuals construe experiences in ways that seem to reinforce unhappiness. In essence, our research shows that happy individuals experience and react to events and circumstances in relatively more positive and more adaptive ways. For a recent example, we found that happy individuals are relatively more likely than their less happy peers to “endow” positive memories (i.e., store them in their emotional “bank ACCOUNTS”) but to “contrast” negative memories (i.e., “life is so much better now”) (Liberman, Boehm, Lyubomirsky, & Ross, 2011).
On-going studies in my laboratory are exploring additional cognitive and motivational processes that support the differing worlds of enduring happiness versus chronic unhappiness. For example, several investigations have revealed that unhappy individuals are more likely than happy ones to dwell on negative or ambiguous events (Lyubomirsky, Boehm, Kasri, & Zehm, 2011). Such “dwelling” or rumination may drain cognitive resources and thus bring to bear a variety of negative consequences, which could further reinforce unhappiness. These findings demonstrate some of the maladaptive by-products of self-reflection, suggesting that not only is the “unexamined life” worth living, but it is potentially full of happiness and joy.
To cast our work on happiness in a broader framework, we have also been exploring the meaning, expression, and pursuit of happiness across cultures, subcultures, and age groups (e.g., Boehm, Lyubomirsky, & Sheldon, 2011). For example, despite media reports, we have found that parents actually experience more happiness and meaning than do non-parents–both when evaluating their lives as a whole, when going about their days, and when caring for their children (versus doing other ACTIVITIES; Nelson, Kushlev, English, Dunn, & Lyubomirsky, 2013). Of course, parents’ happiness is impacted by myriad factors, including their age and SES and their children’s ages and temperaments (Nelson, Kushlev, & Lyubomirsky, in press). Furthermore, we are currently carrying out happiness-increasing interventions among Japanese engineers,
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 612 reviews
January 10, 2009
I got this free from a publisher who wanted me to use it in my class. I applaud the attempt to use actual science in the oversaturated self-help happiness market. Its nice to see somebody with qualifications who actually does research on the topic writing this sort of thing. And as that genre of books go, its probably well above its peers. But I do empirical psychology for a living, and so I couldn't read it without getting into "reviewer mode". And let me tell you, there are a lot of things in this book that I think need revise and resubmit...
For example, the author notes the fact that only 10% of variance in happiness ratings is due to a person's situation (as opposed to behaviors or genetics). Sadly, she then conflates that with the notion that only 10% of a person's subjective happiness is due to a person's situation. The first is a population heritability estimate, the latter looks at individuals. This fundamental mischaracterization of the statistic undermines her entire point.
She also neglects the possibility of interaction terms between situation and behaviors. Yes, its true that interacting with friends is a behavioral variable so gets counted under behavior in her model, but its harder for people living alone in a research station in siberia to interact with friends than folks living in the town they grew up in, so situation (location) needs to be counted in this.
All in all, a sloppy book from a scientific perspective. I stopped reading around chapter 3 because it was pissing me off.
For example, the author notes the fact that only 10% of variance in happiness ratings is due to a person's situation (as opposed to behaviors or genetics). Sadly, she then conflates that with the notion that only 10% of a person's subjective happiness is due to a person's situation. The first is a population heritability estimate, the latter looks at individuals. This fundamental mischaracterization of the statistic undermines her entire point.
She also neglects the possibility of interaction terms between situation and behaviors. Yes, its true that interacting with friends is a behavioral variable so gets counted under behavior in her model, but its harder for people living alone in a research station in siberia to interact with friends than folks living in the town they grew up in, so situation (location) needs to be counted in this.
All in all, a sloppy book from a scientific perspective. I stopped reading around chapter 3 because it was pissing me off.
November 2, 2019
I bought this book out of curiosity - not because I felt particularly unhappy, but because I wondered how I could be even happier. After reading the introduction I was hooked and expected the book to be truly interesting as it was written by an academic researcher specialised in positive psychology.
As someone with a scientific background myself, I was pleased to read in the introduction that "The How of Happiness is different from many self-help books as it represents a distillation of what researchers of the science of happiness, including myself, have uncovered in their empirical investigations. Every suggestion that I offer is supported by scientific research; if evidence is mixed or lacking on a particular subject, I plainly say so." (p.3). The author then goes on to explain that only double-blind experiments with participants chosen at random can determine whether a claim is true, which are often missing in other books and magazines providing advice on how to become happier. Unfortunately, the book didn't live up to these expectations. Mrs Lyubomirsky often resorts to unscientific anecdotes and personal stories (isolated cases) to illustrate her methods. There is hardly anything scientific past the introduction. It's just another book of advice like any other one. It may be based on serious research, but unless you decide to check all the references in the notes section, very little is explained. You just have to trust her. That's not a very convincing approach.
Overall I found the book annoyingly repetitive, with lots of empty sentences stating the obvious or things that are common sense.
The book was also clearly written for an American audience, starting from the premises that the readers are inordinately materialistic and obsessed with work, money and keeping up with the Joneses. It almost feels like the author had the Desperate Housewives in mind when she wrote the book.
I will go as far as to question the reliability of the content of the book itself. When I read on page 45-46 that the weather and personal safety are not important to achieve happiness, one could wonder why so many Northern Europeans suffer from depression in winter, or why bullied children and harassed workers ever commit suicide. Mrs Lyubomirsky claims that studies comparing the happiness levels of Californians and Midwesterners didn't show that Californians were happier in average, and therefore that weather is not a factor influencing happiness. It doesn't take a genius to understand what a gross simplification that is. If people could live as happily in the Arctic regions, then why is there so few people moving to the Canadian North, Greenland or Lapland ?
Mrs Lyubomirsky completely disregards Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which states that people can only be happy once they fulfil life's needs by order of importance. At the bottom of the pyramid are the most fundamental needs, like food, water, sleep and sex. Then comes personal safety, then only friendships and love. Without all these, people cannot move to the next level, which is self-esteem, confidence, and achievements. And only when these needs have been fulfilled can an individual truly reach the level of self-actualization and happiness. How can she, as a psychologist, believe one second that personal safety is not an essential step to achieve happiness ?
I think that the main problem with this book is that the author doesn't understand the essential distinction between being (un)happy about a temporary situation and life in general. She claims from the first page of chapter one that being in a relationship, having a baby, getting a better job, a bigger house, and so on will only make us happy for a short time, until we get accustomed to the novelty and want more. However, some of these cravings are more than mere whims. It is true that some people can be perfectly happy staying single and not having children. But that's a personal choice, emanating from one's character and physiological needs. There are people who simply cannot live a happy life without being in a relationship or without having children. The author's approach is to compare statistics of the happiness level between two groups of people, then wildly claim that because both groups have similar levels of happiness, one factor (like being in a relationship) does not significantly influence happiness. That is very poor science indeed.
What's more, her suggestions to improve our long-term happiness do not differ much from the small highs one get by buying a new car or getting a promotion at work. She advocates doing a series of small things on a daily basis, like being kind to others, showing one's gratitude, or savour one's food. Each of them will only provide a small boost, but doing them frequently and regularly will improve long-term happiness, she explains. I fail to see the difference with enjoying one's life by eating out with friends, watching a good movie, or redecorating the house. It's as if Mrs Lyubomirsky had a moral issue with achieving happiness through material ways and wanted us to do it only through mental or spiritual ways. Perhaps that is a reaction to living in a too materialistic society (California).
There are actually quite a few simple ways of boosting one's mood, and therefore happiness, on a daily basis, which aren't mentioned in the book at all. Sleeping well is one of the most important, as sleep deprivation makes up irritable, stressed, unpleasant and aggressive with others, and even depressed. Watching comedies, playing games, and so on are also good ways.
Finally, Mrs Lyubomirsky only looks at positive ways to enhance happiness, but fails to recognise the importance of reducing negative circumstances. Her methods will never work on someone who is bullied on a daily basis and can't escape from it. That person will remain miserable, because he or she did not achieve personal safety, towards the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. If it is true that we possess an uncanny faculty to adapt to positive changes, even winning the lottery, and some negative changes (illness, unemployment, loss of a relative), deficiencies in the basic necessities of life can seriously affect long-term happiness. Sometimes having a house big enough for all its occupants can become a basic necessity if it is the only way to sleep well regularly. Too bad the author couldn't understand that.
As someone with a scientific background myself, I was pleased to read in the introduction that "The How of Happiness is different from many self-help books as it represents a distillation of what researchers of the science of happiness, including myself, have uncovered in their empirical investigations. Every suggestion that I offer is supported by scientific research; if evidence is mixed or lacking on a particular subject, I plainly say so." (p.3). The author then goes on to explain that only double-blind experiments with participants chosen at random can determine whether a claim is true, which are often missing in other books and magazines providing advice on how to become happier. Unfortunately, the book didn't live up to these expectations. Mrs Lyubomirsky often resorts to unscientific anecdotes and personal stories (isolated cases) to illustrate her methods. There is hardly anything scientific past the introduction. It's just another book of advice like any other one. It may be based on serious research, but unless you decide to check all the references in the notes section, very little is explained. You just have to trust her. That's not a very convincing approach.
Overall I found the book annoyingly repetitive, with lots of empty sentences stating the obvious or things that are common sense.
The book was also clearly written for an American audience, starting from the premises that the readers are inordinately materialistic and obsessed with work, money and keeping up with the Joneses. It almost feels like the author had the Desperate Housewives in mind when she wrote the book.
I will go as far as to question the reliability of the content of the book itself. When I read on page 45-46 that the weather and personal safety are not important to achieve happiness, one could wonder why so many Northern Europeans suffer from depression in winter, or why bullied children and harassed workers ever commit suicide. Mrs Lyubomirsky claims that studies comparing the happiness levels of Californians and Midwesterners didn't show that Californians were happier in average, and therefore that weather is not a factor influencing happiness. It doesn't take a genius to understand what a gross simplification that is. If people could live as happily in the Arctic regions, then why is there so few people moving to the Canadian North, Greenland or Lapland ?
Mrs Lyubomirsky completely disregards Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which states that people can only be happy once they fulfil life's needs by order of importance. At the bottom of the pyramid are the most fundamental needs, like food, water, sleep and sex. Then comes personal safety, then only friendships and love. Without all these, people cannot move to the next level, which is self-esteem, confidence, and achievements. And only when these needs have been fulfilled can an individual truly reach the level of self-actualization and happiness. How can she, as a psychologist, believe one second that personal safety is not an essential step to achieve happiness ?
I think that the main problem with this book is that the author doesn't understand the essential distinction between being (un)happy about a temporary situation and life in general. She claims from the first page of chapter one that being in a relationship, having a baby, getting a better job, a bigger house, and so on will only make us happy for a short time, until we get accustomed to the novelty and want more. However, some of these cravings are more than mere whims. It is true that some people can be perfectly happy staying single and not having children. But that's a personal choice, emanating from one's character and physiological needs. There are people who simply cannot live a happy life without being in a relationship or without having children. The author's approach is to compare statistics of the happiness level between two groups of people, then wildly claim that because both groups have similar levels of happiness, one factor (like being in a relationship) does not significantly influence happiness. That is very poor science indeed.
What's more, her suggestions to improve our long-term happiness do not differ much from the small highs one get by buying a new car or getting a promotion at work. She advocates doing a series of small things on a daily basis, like being kind to others, showing one's gratitude, or savour one's food. Each of them will only provide a small boost, but doing them frequently and regularly will improve long-term happiness, she explains. I fail to see the difference with enjoying one's life by eating out with friends, watching a good movie, or redecorating the house. It's as if Mrs Lyubomirsky had a moral issue with achieving happiness through material ways and wanted us to do it only through mental or spiritual ways. Perhaps that is a reaction to living in a too materialistic society (California).
There are actually quite a few simple ways of boosting one's mood, and therefore happiness, on a daily basis, which aren't mentioned in the book at all. Sleeping well is one of the most important, as sleep deprivation makes up irritable, stressed, unpleasant and aggressive with others, and even depressed. Watching comedies, playing games, and so on are also good ways.
Finally, Mrs Lyubomirsky only looks at positive ways to enhance happiness, but fails to recognise the importance of reducing negative circumstances. Her methods will never work on someone who is bullied on a daily basis and can't escape from it. That person will remain miserable, because he or she did not achieve personal safety, towards the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. If it is true that we possess an uncanny faculty to adapt to positive changes, even winning the lottery, and some negative changes (illness, unemployment, loss of a relative), deficiencies in the basic necessities of life can seriously affect long-term happiness. Sometimes having a house big enough for all its occupants can become a basic necessity if it is the only way to sleep well regularly. Too bad the author couldn't understand that.
June 28, 2008
As someone who has been on a bit of a quest for several years now, I can say that this book illuminated a whole new corner of the tent under which all things happiness-related are kept. Sonja is a scientist in the field of positive psychology (studying what makes people happy to begin with as opposed to unraveling problems after they have manifested themselves) with a scoff-proof academic pedigree (hello, Harvard and Stanford). For anyone who has a hard time buying into things like "The Secret" because they lack a concrete scientific underpinning, THE HOW OF HAPPINESS presents a specific, hands-on approach that's chock full of controlled, documented research and data. And if that sounds a little dry, fear not because Sonja's a natural teacher (professor, actually) and she presents the material in her own down-to-earth, conversational and entertaining style. A must-read for anyone who's serious about being, well, happy.
February 24, 2008
Excellent book on tangible ways to increase happiness in your life. Basic theory: We have a genetic happiness set point that accounts for 50% of our happiness, 10% of our happiness comes from our life's circumstances, like where we live, what car we drive, how much money we make, etc. And the remaining 40% rests in how we choose to be happy everyday (i.e. our daily activities). The book focuses on refining that 40%. All based on empirical evidence. A must read.
January 20, 2025
Books read & reviewed: 2️⃣6️⃣🥖4️⃣0️⃣0️⃣
╔⏤⏤⏤╝❀╚⏤⏤⏤╗
3️⃣🌟, it had something related to religion.
——————————————————————
➕➖0️⃣1️⃣2️⃣3️⃣4️⃣5️⃣6️⃣7️⃣8️⃣9️⃣🔟✖️➗
Happiness activity number 11: also known as "get a religion" cuz duh scientific books need to feature religious instances.
"Only looks at positive ways to enhance happiness, but fails to recognize the importance of reducing negative circumstances"
Woah, other reviews are like so poetic hahahahaha
One time that i could absolutely take away from this book is happiness activity number three which states to just don't overthink and social comparison shit is just one of the things that just makes you down nowwwwww yoo. Period
But one thing tho, what qualifies as a "healthy traumatic coping mechanism" and how can you prove that my way of coping is not good for me, because i don't know about you but my way is za healthy way
i repeat,. MY WAY IS THE HEALTHY WAY
jk, maybe not, or maybe yes?
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*Pre-Read✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
Scientific??? Hmmmmmmmmmmm well let's see. Will this book ever mentioned bible quotes? Will this book ever feature claims unsupported by evidences?
╔⏤⏤⏤╝❀╚⏤⏤⏤╗
3️⃣🌟, it had something related to religion.
——————————————————————
➕➖0️⃣1️⃣2️⃣3️⃣4️⃣5️⃣6️⃣7️⃣8️⃣9️⃣🔟✖️➗
Happiness activity number 11: also known as "get a religion" cuz duh scientific books need to feature religious instances.
"Only looks at positive ways to enhance happiness, but fails to recognize the importance of reducing negative circumstances"
Woah, other reviews are like so poetic hahahahaha
One time that i could absolutely take away from this book is happiness activity number three which states to just don't overthink and social comparison shit is just one of the things that just makes you down nowwwwww yoo. Period
But one thing tho, what qualifies as a "healthy traumatic coping mechanism" and how can you prove that my way of coping is not good for me, because i don't know about you but my way is za healthy way
i repeat,. MY WAY IS THE HEALTHY WAY
jk, maybe not, or maybe yes?
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*Pre-Read✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
Scientific??? Hmmmmmmmmmmm well let's see. Will this book ever mentioned bible quotes? Will this book ever feature claims unsupported by evidences?
March 3, 2023
شكراً لدكتورة المساق الذي تعرفت من خلالها على هذه الكتب
مما أعجبني في الكتاب عدة أمور:
١- البعد عن النظرة الوردية للسعادة وكيف أن «الإيجابية السامة» تضرّ أكثر مما تنفع.
٢- كل ما تظنه سيحقق لك السعادة (دنيوياً) لو تحقق ستفرح فيه مؤقتا ثم ستعتاد عليه.
٣- الكتاب فيه اختبارات بسيطة لتحديد مستوى السعادة التي تعيشها اليوم.
٤- التقنيات التي رشحتها المؤلفة( كسر المألوفات/ الانغماس في هواية / الرياضة / النوم الكافي / التأمل (اليوغا).
عموماً كتاب جيد.
مما أعجبني في الكتاب عدة أمور:
١- البعد عن النظرة الوردية للسعادة وكيف أن «الإيجابية السامة» تضرّ أكثر مما تنفع.
٢- كل ما تظنه سيحقق لك السعادة (دنيوياً) لو تحقق ستفرح فيه مؤقتا ثم ستعتاد عليه.
٣- الكتاب فيه اختبارات بسيطة لتحديد مستوى السعادة التي تعيشها اليوم.
٤- التقنيات التي رشحتها المؤلفة( كسر المألوفات/ الانغماس في هواية / الرياضة / النوم الكافي / التأمل (اليوغا).
عموماً كتاب جيد.
December 29, 2012
Lyubomirsky asserts that up to 40% of your happiness is within your power to change. She then makes available a number of assessment instruments that measure your happiness level and help you select from 12 happiness activities that best match your personality, resources, goals and needs. Each of the activities is presented with empirical evidence of its efficacy and suggestions for related activities that might also fit. These activities represent habits rather than goals, and as such, are something one could practice most days.
The final section of the book is dedicated to enhancing one's likelihood of success with the happiness activities. It provides the rationale for how and why all these approaches work. And, how to increase the odds of success through:
1. Positive emotion,
2. Optimal timing and variety,
3. Social support,
4. Motivation, effort and commitment,and
5. Habit
While both my personal experience and the scientific evidence presented support the notion that engaging in these happiness activities does increase one's enjoyment of life, I think the approach gives short shrift to the importance of significance in life. Certainly, when one savors, takes care of one's body or expresses gratitude, one's mode is lifted. But, where is the gratification or flow in those more raw emotional pleasures.
The book is really good, as far as it goes, but if you are looking for something about how to live a full life, you'll need to find another book.
The final section of the book is dedicated to enhancing one's likelihood of success with the happiness activities. It provides the rationale for how and why all these approaches work. And, how to increase the odds of success through:
1. Positive emotion,
2. Optimal timing and variety,
3. Social support,
4. Motivation, effort and commitment,and
5. Habit
While both my personal experience and the scientific evidence presented support the notion that engaging in these happiness activities does increase one's enjoyment of life, I think the approach gives short shrift to the importance of significance in life. Certainly, when one savors, takes care of one's body or expresses gratitude, one's mode is lifted. But, where is the gratification or flow in those more raw emotional pleasures.
The book is really good, as far as it goes, but if you are looking for something about how to live a full life, you'll need to find another book.
November 5, 2011
I am about half-way through this book and it is beginning to annoy me a little. If you have read anything in the positive psychology vein, Seligman, Peterson or Csiksentmihalyi, this will not be new.
I know there is research behind what she is saying so I don't need to be reminded every second sentence.
I also find her very repetitive. I know it is writen for the non-expert but I really do not think there is any need to keep repeating everthing ad nauseum.
The "hows" are interesting and applicable and I was trying to reflect on how I would feel if I had never read anything on positive psychology. I think it would definitely have stimulated my interest but I also think I would have felt very over-whelmed by all her suggestions.
It is useful to be able to skip from one section to the next so I like the structure.
It is a very easy read and would be a very useful guide to the whole area of positive psychology but I prefer something a bit more background and less instructions in books like these.
I know there is research behind what she is saying so I don't need to be reminded every second sentence.
I also find her very repetitive. I know it is writen for the non-expert but I really do not think there is any need to keep repeating everthing ad nauseum.
The "hows" are interesting and applicable and I was trying to reflect on how I would feel if I had never read anything on positive psychology. I think it would definitely have stimulated my interest but I also think I would have felt very over-whelmed by all her suggestions.
It is useful to be able to skip from one section to the next so I like the structure.
It is a very easy read and would be a very useful guide to the whole area of positive psychology but I prefer something a bit more background and less instructions in books like these.
August 3, 2013
In my quest to find the mystery to life, I go through yet another self-help book, but with “How of Happiness”, I was lured in by its promise of a scientific approach to happiness.
Biggest bullshit ever.
The scientific angle is merely a ploy to make it more legitimate. The book is exactly the same as every other self-help book, with the exact same advices, and the only difference being every cliché being started with “According to studies…”. Usually, the studies are never explained or mentioned, and if they are mentioned, there is a only a brief explanation of how it was conducted. I’ve known studies enough that I know that you can basically build a study for any outcome you want.
Scientific research is usually only interesting to me if the study proves something which seem to be contrary to current common sense belief. But for this book, it might as well have made statement such as, “Studies show fat people have more weight than thin people”, “According to recent studies, a study of 500 dead people shows no heart activity”, “Recent studies show that I’m fucking awesome”. Everyone knows all that.
Biggest bullshit ever.
The scientific angle is merely a ploy to make it more legitimate. The book is exactly the same as every other self-help book, with the exact same advices, and the only difference being every cliché being started with “According to studies…”. Usually, the studies are never explained or mentioned, and if they are mentioned, there is a only a brief explanation of how it was conducted. I’ve known studies enough that I know that you can basically build a study for any outcome you want.
Scientific research is usually only interesting to me if the study proves something which seem to be contrary to current common sense belief. But for this book, it might as well have made statement such as, “Studies show fat people have more weight than thin people”, “According to recent studies, a study of 500 dead people shows no heart activity”, “Recent studies show that I’m fucking awesome”. Everyone knows all that.
April 1, 2021
التكيّف مع المتعة
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واحدة من أكبر المفارقات في سعينا لنصبح أكثر سعادة هو أن الكثير منا يركز على تغيير ظروف حياتنا على أمل مضلل أن هذه التغييرات ستحقق السعادة.
في محاولة لتهدئة التعاسة ، قد يختار خريج جامعي حديث ، وظيفة ذات راتب عالي في مدينة بعيدة ، وقد تخضع المطلقة في منتصف العمر لعملية تجميلية ، أو قد يشتري الزوجان المتقاعدان منزل ذو إطلالة. لسوء الحظ ، من المرجح أن يصبح كل هؤلاء الأفراد أكثر سعادة مؤقتًا فقط. تظهر مجموعة رائعة من الأبحاث الآن أن محاولة أن تكون سعيدًا من خلال تغيير مواقف حياتك لن تنجح في النهاية.
لماذا تغيرات الحياة لا تأخذ في الحسبان سوى القليل؟ بسبب القوة الهائلة التي يسميها علماء النفس «تكيف المتعة»
البشر بارعون بشكل ملحوظ في التعود بسرعة على التغيرات الحسية أو الفسيولوجية. عندما تدخل من البرد القارس ، تشعر بدفء النيران المتلألئة في البداية ، لكنك تعتاد عليها بسرعة وقد تنزعج منها . عندما تفوح من شقتك رائحة معتدلة ولكن واضحة ، فقد لا تلاحظها تمامًا حتى تغادر لفترة من الوقت وتعود. تسمى هذه التجربة التكيف الفسيولوجي أو الحسي. ومع ذلك ، فإن الظاهرة نفسها تحدث مع التحولات الممتعة - أي الانتقال ، والزواج ، وتغيير الوظيفة - التي تجعلك أكثر سعادة لبعض الوقت ، ولكن لفترة قصيرة فقط.
لإعطاء مثال ملموس : أجريت جراحة العيون بالليزر في سن السادسة والثلاثين ، بعد عمر من عدم الراحة بسبب العدسات اللاصقة والنظارات. كانت النتيجة معجزة. لأول مرة ، تمكنت من قراءة لافتات الشوارع ، وإخبار الوقت عند الاستيقاظ في منتصف الليل ، ورؤية أصابع قدمي أثناء الاستحمام. جعلتني الجراحة سعيدة للغاية. ومع ذلك ، بشكل ملحوظ ، بعد حوالي أسبوعين ، كنت متكيفة تمامًا وبشكل مثالي مع رؤيتي الجديدة 20/20 ، ولم تعد توفر السعادة التي حصلت عليها في ذلك اليوم الأول الذي لا يُنسى. كل شخص تقريبًا لديه قصص مثل هذه: حول الانتقال إلى منزل أكبر ، أو الحصول على ترقية أو زيادة في الراتب أو السفر في الدرجة الأولى. حاول علماء النفس البحثي تعميم هذه التجربة من خلال التحقيق فيها بشكل منهجي - على سبيل المثال ، التساؤل عما إذا كان الناس يظهرون تكيفًا ممتعًا مع أحداث الحياة المهمة مثل الزواج أو الثروة المفاجئة أو المرض المزمن. اتضح أنهم يفعلون.
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Sonja Lyubomirsky :المصدر
The How Of Happiness
ترجمة ماهر رزوق
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واحدة من أكبر المفارقات في سعينا لنصبح أكثر سعادة هو أن الكثير منا يركز على تغيير ظروف حياتنا على أمل مضلل أن هذه التغييرات ستحقق السعادة.
في محاولة لتهدئة التعاسة ، قد يختار خريج جامعي حديث ، وظيفة ذات راتب عالي في مدينة بعيدة ، وقد تخضع المطلقة في منتصف العمر لعملية تجميلية ، أو قد يشتري الزوجان المتقاعدان منزل ذو إطلالة. لسوء الحظ ، من المرجح أن يصبح كل هؤلاء الأفراد أكثر سعادة مؤقتًا فقط. تظهر مجموعة رائعة من الأبحاث الآن أن محاولة أن تكون سعيدًا من خلال تغيير مواقف حياتك لن تنجح في النهاية.
لماذا تغيرات الحياة لا تأخذ في الحسبان سوى القليل؟ بسبب القوة الهائلة التي يسميها علماء النفس «تكيف المتعة»
البشر بارعون بشكل ملحوظ في التعود بسرعة على التغيرات الحسية أو الفسيولوجية. عندما تدخل من البرد القارس ، تشعر بدفء النيران المتلألئة في البداية ، لكنك تعتاد عليها بسرعة وقد تنزعج منها . عندما تفوح من شقتك رائحة معتدلة ولكن واضحة ، فقد لا تلاحظها تمامًا حتى تغادر لفترة من الوقت وتعود. تسمى هذه التجربة التكيف الفسيولوجي أو الحسي. ومع ذلك ، فإن الظاهرة نفسها تحدث مع التحولات الممتعة - أي الانتقال ، والزواج ، وتغيير الوظيفة - التي تجعلك أكثر سعادة لبعض الوقت ، ولكن لفترة قصيرة فقط.
لإعطاء مثال ملموس : أجريت جراحة العيون بالليزر في سن السادسة والثلاثين ، بعد عمر من عدم الراحة بسبب العدسات اللاصقة والنظارات. كانت النتيجة معجزة. لأول مرة ، تمكنت من قراءة لافتات الشوارع ، وإخبار الوقت عند الاستيقاظ في منتصف الليل ، ورؤية أصابع قدمي أثناء الاستحمام. جعلتني الجراحة سعيدة للغاية. ومع ذلك ، بشكل ملحوظ ، بعد حوالي أسبوعين ، كنت متكيفة تمامًا وبشكل مثالي مع رؤيتي الجديدة 20/20 ، ولم تعد توفر السعادة التي حصلت عليها في ذلك اليوم الأول الذي لا يُنسى. كل شخص تقريبًا لديه قصص مثل هذه: حول الانتقال إلى منزل أكبر ، أو الحصول على ترقية أو زيادة في الراتب أو السفر في الدرجة الأولى. حاول علماء النفس البحثي تعميم هذه التجربة من خلال التحقيق فيها بشكل منهجي - على سبيل المثال ، التساؤل عما إذا كان الناس يظهرون تكيفًا ممتعًا مع أحداث الحياة المهمة مثل الزواج أو الثروة المفاجئة أو المرض المزمن. اتضح أنهم يفعلون.
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Sonja Lyubomirsky :المصدر
The How Of Happiness
ترجمة ماهر رزوق
December 23, 2020
A comprehensive, well-researched book on how to become happier. While we have a set point for happiness that is predetermined, based on our genetic makeup, there is still 40% of our happiness level that can be changed. This book makes the point that changing life situations (such as winning the lottery) give a brief boost in happiness but then you’re back to your set point, a process called “hedonic adaptation”. Given the times we live in, a book on how to increase happiness seemed like a good idea.
Several different happiness scales are included. The first one is a subjective test and when I took it, I found out I wasn’t as happy as I thought I was, which put me off the book for several weeks. However, I think the test results are culturally-based as I come from a culture that is more reserved (and we therefore rate ourselves lower) than that of the U.S. The second happiness test – the Oxford scale – is more objective. There is also a test to see if you are clinically depressed.
The next test helps you determine which happiness activities would be the best fit for you, because there isn’t any point in doing activities that you don’t enjoy and/or value, as you’re not likely to continue doing them. Then it’s into the meat of the book: the activities that increase happiness. The author includes both the “why” (how these activities contribute to happiness), as well as what – specifically - to do. For instance, if the activity is working towards goals, you need to make sure they’re intrinsic goals that align with your values. The section on physical health teaches you how to calculate your maximum heart rate. The activities have been shown (through studies) to work and information is included on how to implement them for the best results. For instance: express your gratitude once per week instead of more frequently and you’ll be happier, perhaps because it feels less like a chore. Some of the activities have caveats not to overindulge in the activity, or sometimes the afterword will better explain the concept (for instance: being optimistic doesn’t mean ignoring the bad in life).
While weighty, this was a worthwhile read and had quite a few takeaways for me.
Several different happiness scales are included. The first one is a subjective test and when I took it, I found out I wasn’t as happy as I thought I was, which put me off the book for several weeks. However, I think the test results are culturally-based as I come from a culture that is more reserved (and we therefore rate ourselves lower) than that of the U.S. The second happiness test – the Oxford scale – is more objective. There is also a test to see if you are clinically depressed.
The next test helps you determine which happiness activities would be the best fit for you, because there isn’t any point in doing activities that you don’t enjoy and/or value, as you’re not likely to continue doing them. Then it’s into the meat of the book: the activities that increase happiness. The author includes both the “why” (how these activities contribute to happiness), as well as what – specifically - to do. For instance, if the activity is working towards goals, you need to make sure they’re intrinsic goals that align with your values. The section on physical health teaches you how to calculate your maximum heart rate. The activities have been shown (through studies) to work and information is included on how to implement them for the best results. For instance: express your gratitude once per week instead of more frequently and you’ll be happier, perhaps because it feels less like a chore. Some of the activities have caveats not to overindulge in the activity, or sometimes the afterword will better explain the concept (for instance: being optimistic doesn’t mean ignoring the bad in life).
While weighty, this was a worthwhile read and had quite a few takeaways for me.
May 21, 2021
Although this claims to be a book based on scientific evidence, her claims of evidence are vague, stretches, drawn out, and repetitive, using unscientific anecdotes and isolated testimonies of "happy people" ("this person lost everything they loved, but they're still happy!") along the way, despite arguing in the introduction that this book isn't like other self help books in that sense). There were numerous times I came across her mentioning how "studies show..." without making note of which ones they are in her references, or how the mentioned conclusion was even drawn. Many of the concepts are ridiculously obvious ("social support is important! be grateful! exercise!"), but even that would be fine if the author actually sat down and described the studies, how they were conducted, how "happiness" and other intangible/abstract variables were measured, and their potential flaws and implications. The problem is that she doesn't - and on the rare occasion when she actually discusses a particular study, you only really get that 1) it was a study conducted on [insert concept here without defining how it was measured], and therefore [broad conclusion]. If you're going to market your book as having a scientific approach, you need to actually tell your readers about the science. "Just trust me" is not a convincing argument.
Maybe this is just me, but many of her points also came off as a bit "if you're not happy, you're just not trying hard enough!", with the side note about depression that felt a bit othering. Her whole argument that situation and circumstance hardly impact your overall happiness also just doesn't make sense. Maslow's hierarchy of needs, anyone?
Anyway, as someone passionate about and is soon to have a degree in psychology, I'd suggest saving your time and money and looking for something more solid and conclusive. All it did for me was piss me off lol
Maybe this is just me, but many of her points also came off as a bit "if you're not happy, you're just not trying hard enough!", with the side note about depression that felt a bit othering. Her whole argument that situation and circumstance hardly impact your overall happiness also just doesn't make sense. Maslow's hierarchy of needs, anyone?
Anyway, as someone passionate about and is soon to have a degree in psychology, I'd suggest saving your time and money and looking for something more solid and conclusive. All it did for me was piss me off lol
October 19, 2021
I read this book for my Honors Pop Psychology class, and I have conflicting feelings about the book. Some parts of the book seem oversimplified and shallow, and yet other parts carry lots of weight. Much of the book is a collection of specific activities focused on increasing the 40% of happiness that is within our ability to change. In our class, we actually would take aside 30 minutes to do some of the activities mentioned, and I found them to be really helpful. Most of them were just good things like reflection, vision-casting, writing letters to loved ones, etc.
Lyubomirsky mentions religion/religious activities as one strategy for increasing happiness. It seemed to me like the center of focus was slightly off, though. Instead of using religion as a means to happiness, I think a more complete understanding would be this: allow yourself to be transformed by Jesus, which then produces joy (among other virtues) as a byproduct.
So all in all, this book had a lot of good pointers and tips for how to make your life a little better. Some people may benefit immensely from the lessons in this book, but I feel like they were redundant after reading books such as Mindset: The New Psychology of Success or Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones.
Lyubomirsky mentions religion/religious activities as one strategy for increasing happiness. It seemed to me like the center of focus was slightly off, though. Instead of using religion as a means to happiness, I think a more complete understanding would be this: allow yourself to be transformed by Jesus, which then produces joy (among other virtues) as a byproduct.
So all in all, this book had a lot of good pointers and tips for how to make your life a little better. Some people may benefit immensely from the lessons in this book, but I feel like they were redundant after reading books such as Mindset: The New Psychology of Success or Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones.
February 17, 2022
I don’t think there was anything particularly wrong with this. There was nothing I could point out as different from other self help I’ve read in tone or content, but I found it kind of off-putting. I struggled with the idea that we can make ourselves happier and see all these examples of worse off people doing it. It just made me feel weird and icky, I am going to attempt some of the tasks suggested, but I don’t feel like it told me much I didn’t already know and I didn’t enjoy the reading experience. The religion suggestions, especially, rubbed me wrong as it only focused on the self-reporting of happiness and health in religious people and not that there is plenty of religious trauma out there and religion may make many people unhappy - if you’re already religious, absolutely make an effort to practice more, but if you’re not, it doesn’t seem like a simple habit to just pick up and seems to assume a high percentage of religiosity in the population - she claims only 6 percent never pray. To whom? The universe? A specific God? Any God(s)? That is a very odd statistic to me. I do see that there’s a footnote but I was listening at that point and the references were not in the audio. The audio was well done, but it was hard to do the evaluation portions while listening and I switched to the ebook for those.
May 16, 2024
Required for positive psych class
They should rename this book “how the 1% privileged can become even more privileged and happy”.
They should rename this book “how the 1% privileged can become even more privileged and happy”.
June 23, 2024
A Practical guide to be being happier from which I learned a lot of practical activities to set up to level up on the happiness field.
I truly enjoyed reading this book, although I did still find it a bit too subjective at time, making the information seem less trustworthy. That being said, I recommend ;)
I truly enjoyed reading this book, although I did still find it a bit too subjective at time, making the information seem less trustworthy. That being said, I recommend ;)
March 22, 2019
I was assigned to read this book for a psychology class and I can't say that I was mad about it. I've never really read a "self-help" book before, but if you are in that boat as well. This is an awesome place to start. I think the most important aspect of this book is that is is research based. Another aspect that I appreciated was the fact that the book was personalizeable based on tests at the beginning of the book. So, depending on the results of those test, the book can be tailored to you specifically.
December 7, 2011
What are the thing's that make a person happier? The author gather's much of the research data done on happiness and lays it out for you.
There really aren't any big surprises involved here. It's stuff like exercise, having friends, being a considerate and optimistic person. Stuff like that. She comes up with a list of 12 things that any person could do to become happier in general. This after the caveat that a great deal of one's happiness seems to actually be already set by birth, in other words whether you are chipper or a grump most of that is genetics. (I've always suspected this.) Science has found that wealth, fortune, fame and tragedy all have a much smaller effect on our happiness than we might think.
After genetics, a great deal of how happy or how sad a person is, is up to them. What is interesting is that so many of the things that make a person happy are the same proverbs and ideas espoused by the world's great religions. Stuff like forgiveness, mindful awareness and so on. It is kind of funny that the latest scientific research is really just a validation of the 2,000+ yrs. old teachings of Christ and the Buddha.
So, there is really nothing groundbreaking here. However it's still a well written, concise and helpful look at healthy human psychology. And, as someone who can't stand overly schmalzy stuff, I think the author does a great job of being inspiring without being cloying or too touchy-feely. Basically it's a self-help book without the cheesy attitude.
October 13, 2011
I followed the Nancy Pearl rule, though not intentionally. It was near page 50 that I decided this book was, well, ridiculous. Self-reporting of happiness? No discussion of how that might in itself be relative? That and the author's declaration, as thought it would be true of all people, that cuddling one's own child is the epitome of happiness. Uhm, I'm pretty sure those parents out there that didn't want to be parents wouldn't ALL agree with that.
I do believe that one can do things to change one's own level of happiness. This book, though, presents scientific studies the way that a lot of the popular media does... oversimplification and no explanation of exceptions.
I have the urge to pick apart lots of stuff that I read in those first 50 pages, but it's not really necessary. If anyone who's reading this review disagrees, though, I'd love to discuss it.
I do believe that one can do things to change one's own level of happiness. This book, though, presents scientific studies the way that a lot of the popular media does... oversimplification and no explanation of exceptions.
I have the urge to pick apart lots of stuff that I read in those first 50 pages, but it's not really necessary. If anyone who's reading this review disagrees, though, I'd love to discuss it.
June 1, 2021
It may be surprising to see me give 5 starts to a “self-help” book, or maybe it’s just what you’d expect of me. But I’m not one for pop self help; in fact, this is the first self help book I’ve ever read. But there’s a good reason for this: this book is more a compendium of decades of positive psychology research, affirmed by the extensive bibliography in the back and the frequent citations throughout the book itself, rather than the typical anecdotally based self help book (as Harvard doctor Daniel Goldberg aptly notes). The author is the professor of psychology for the University of California, Riverside, and her synthesis of research is attested to by many, including professors of psychology from both Yale and Harvard.
The basis of this book is that 40% of a person’s happiness is in the hands of the individual to control. Based on this thesis, she gives 12 research-backed activities for increasing that happiness. Many aren’t surprising, such as meditation/prayer, physical exercise, committing to meaningful goals, etc. However, the true value of this book lies in the HOW of these activities: Lyubomirsky gives in depth explications of the various research-based methods through with one can and should pursue each of these activities and, perhaps more importantly, how one should not. I appreciate this book for its balanced views (though the author is self-proclaimed nonreligious or spiritual, one of the activities is religion/spirituality), it’s recognition of the silver lining in all things, the honesty it brings to this discussion of happiness in our lives.
I could say much more, but please read it for yourself. You may find yourself, like me, picking up new practices or refining others.
The basis of this book is that 40% of a person’s happiness is in the hands of the individual to control. Based on this thesis, she gives 12 research-backed activities for increasing that happiness. Many aren’t surprising, such as meditation/prayer, physical exercise, committing to meaningful goals, etc. However, the true value of this book lies in the HOW of these activities: Lyubomirsky gives in depth explications of the various research-based methods through with one can and should pursue each of these activities and, perhaps more importantly, how one should not. I appreciate this book for its balanced views (though the author is self-proclaimed nonreligious or spiritual, one of the activities is religion/spirituality), it’s recognition of the silver lining in all things, the honesty it brings to this discussion of happiness in our lives.
I could say much more, but please read it for yourself. You may find yourself, like me, picking up new practices or refining others.
January 8, 2021
This book purports to be a scientific approach to improving your happiness level. The author asserts that you can control about 40% of your happiness. She provides several assessment tools to measure your current happiness state and happiness activities that would best suit your personality and life style, as ways to improve your happiness. There are 12 areas of activities presented that can be employed to assist in enhancing your happiness.
I really enjoyed the beginning of the book and the scientific background and studies cited to explain her theories. I was hopeful that the book would scientifically explain how these methods could impact your efforts to increase happiness levels. However, the rest of the book seemed to be less supported by data and research. Also, the impact of these activities didn't necessarily include other factors to happiness and well-being. Some of her suggestions and stories seemed to be a little repetitive. While I think that some of the suggested activities could certainly enhance one's approach to happiness, I was hoping for more scientific support to the suggestions.
I really enjoyed the beginning of the book and the scientific background and studies cited to explain her theories. I was hopeful that the book would scientifically explain how these methods could impact your efforts to increase happiness levels. However, the rest of the book seemed to be less supported by data and research. Also, the impact of these activities didn't necessarily include other factors to happiness and well-being. Some of her suggestions and stories seemed to be a little repetitive. While I think that some of the suggested activities could certainly enhance one's approach to happiness, I was hoping for more scientific support to the suggestions.
March 22, 2024
(no spoiler) jag och self help books är inte bff 🥲 Jag hatade den här boken. Jag kände att den kunde ha varit 10 s och Sonja kunde VERKLIGEN tänkt mer på hur en uttrycker sig. Den här boken är känd för att ha vetenskap bakom sig. Is this aprils fools undrar jag då? vetenskapen är handplockade intervjuer och studier baserade på formulärer (som kan manipuleras och tolkas lite hur som helst). Boken är uppdelad i 3 delar och jag gillade faktiskt vissa delar av del 2 där hon ger strategier på hur en blir mer lycklig. Men även där blev jag rätt irriterad.. För mig kändes hela boken som en psykolog som säger "tänk positivt!".. Boken var en del av en kurs och det blev intressanta konverstioner ändå! Vissa i klassen som gillade boken visade mig nya perspektiv och berättade varför dem gillade den. Exempelvis om en känner sig lite vilsen i vardagen osv. Därav kan jag förstå att boken kan hjälpa vissa, men för mig kunde den inte bli mer fel. Den hade motsatt effekt för mig istället.. jag blev bara olycklig av den (how ironic). Men funkar som sagt för vissa!
March 28, 2020
This book has tons of great information about how to be happy and how to maintain that happiness once you achieve it. The author gives many strategies for cultivating happiness and all of them are supported by many scientific studies. It is a bit of a dense read if you don't have a lot of experience with psychology focused texts. I don't and this took me a few days to read. It just has too much information to read all in one sitting. At least it did for me. All in all, I would recommend this book to anyone who finds happiness a worthwhile pursuit.
June 19, 2024
I listened and read this book on happiness. I enjoyed both versions but think that I retained more information from the audio book. Maybe I was swirly (I probably was) so having both was a gift to help me. This book is well researched and provided tangible tips and tools on how to be happier in our lives. The studies on gratefulness and positivity stood out to me and I will be using this as a tool to reference later!
June 8, 2020
If you want to read this book, physical book would be much better than audio. For such books (full of lists, activities and exercises), physical book might be easier to follow. The author suggested some strategies to boost your happiness. You rank these strategies based on your background, priorities and other personal characteristics. She clearly explains (sometimes which is a lot) each strategy and elaborates on how they affect our happiness. There are some practical activities which sound very trivial and easy to follow.
July 13, 2023
I’m not a big “self-help” guy but I really enjoyed this book. I read it so I was prepared to teach a class on happiness in the Fall, and I think it was pretty well written and far from boring. I suggest it, and there’s definitely some solid nuggets of wisdom and solid life help in here.
April 17, 2021
I read this for my Psychology of Happiness course this semester. Overall a solid book if you're looking for concrete ways to improve your happiness. I was able to relate a lot of it to the Biblical truth I know so that was nice!
August 21, 2024
A bit hard to get through as it felt quite repetitive at times. However, undeniably well-researched and useful, with many specific actions one can take to improve their happiness. Another book checked off from Abby's class list. One more to go!
February 16, 2025
Read this book alongside the science of wellbeing course (Yale via Coursera). Practical, educational, approachable with key takeaways
February 3, 2013
If we are going to achieve anything substantial in our lives, it will require a committed effort. The author points out that the same principle applies to our state of happiness - a good deal of effort is required. She calls it "the most rewarding work we'll ever do."
Ms. Lyubomirsky describes a mindstate called Self-Focused Rumination which is a term psychologists use to describe otherthinking. She writes: "The combination of rumination and a negative mood is toxic.....People who ruminate while sad or distraught are likely to feel powerless, self-critical and pessimistic."
She also explores the concept of "barrier thoughts." This term describes our automatic pessimistic thoughts and responses to situations. These thoughts are referred to as "barrier thoughts" because they serve as barriers to optimism which is a key ingredient of happiness.
Ms. Lyubomirsky provides 12 empirically proven "Happiness Activities." She emphasizes that we should put into daily practice just a few of the 12 activities. She recommends choosing three or four activites that are a fit to our own unique personality and lifestyle. The book demonstrates that happiness is within us - it is in what we do and how we act every day of our lives. It provides us with action steps that can be taken to boost our happiness levels, starting today.
Ms. Lyubomirsky describes a mindstate called Self-Focused Rumination which is a term psychologists use to describe otherthinking. She writes: "The combination of rumination and a negative mood is toxic.....People who ruminate while sad or distraught are likely to feel powerless, self-critical and pessimistic."
She also explores the concept of "barrier thoughts." This term describes our automatic pessimistic thoughts and responses to situations. These thoughts are referred to as "barrier thoughts" because they serve as barriers to optimism which is a key ingredient of happiness.
Ms. Lyubomirsky provides 12 empirically proven "Happiness Activities." She emphasizes that we should put into daily practice just a few of the 12 activities. She recommends choosing three or four activites that are a fit to our own unique personality and lifestyle. The book demonstrates that happiness is within us - it is in what we do and how we act every day of our lives. It provides us with action steps that can be taken to boost our happiness levels, starting today.
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