Two things work well in this novel: the opening chapter, featuring a haplessly mediocre spy being eliminated, is very funny and delightfully written, and the penultimate sequence in which three men climb the Eigerwand is harrowing and suspenseful. Everything else is terrible.
The main flaw is the horrendous misogyny. You could argue this is part of the satire, or parody; clearly Trevanian is mocking the James Bond-style romp in which nearly every woman’s name is a homonym for something sexual (or just dirty) and the suave spy can get anyone into bed. So we have the characters Randy Nickers, the virginal Cherry Pitt, and Anna Bidet (pronounced on-a). The spymaster is named Yurasis Dragon (your ass is draggin’?). His ugly receptionist is Mrs. Cerberus. The black stewardess the protagonist falls in love with is Jemima Brown (she and the protagonist have a meta discussion of how idiotic her name is). There’s also a little dog named Faggot, owned by a gay man. But the parodic tone is dropped completely when the mountain-climbing scene happens; it feels like a complete switch of gears (and a much better book).
Ten-dollar words are awkwardly sprinkled throughout: abacination, lepidote, ambuscade, ranine.
The plot entails Dr. Jonathan Hemlock, an art professor who lives in a converted gothic church on Long Island and keeps a basement full of stolen Impressionist masterpieces, who has a side job as spy to earn the money to buy more art and pay the mortgage on his house. His current task is to assassinate (sanction) the killers of an agent who was murdered in the book’s opening scene. He dispatches the first one quickly, but the second assassin remains anonymous. He is told only that the man has a limp and he will be climbing the Eiger. Jonathan happens to be an ace mountaineer so he brushes up on his skills and joins the climbing team. He expects to be given the identity of the assassin before the climb starts, but he murders the only man who knows (the owner of Faggot). So he climbs not knowing whom to trust.
“Wormwood’s step was crisp along the emptying street. He felt uplifted by a sense – not of greatness, to be sure – but of adequacy.” (The promise of this writing, which makes you think of Waugh or le Carré, dissipates once the first chapter ends.) Wormwood’s sense of adequacy is misplaced, because “the men at home base were already referring to him as the “one-man Bay of Pigs.””
There was such an avalanche of crudeness that I didn’t even bother to document half of it.
Jonathan was raised by a foster parent, a spinster with a “sandpaper crotch.” He knows this because she begins to sexually abuse him.
“…there were only two kinds of women with whom he had never had experience: Australian Abos and Eskimos. And neither of these ethnic gaps was he eager to fill, for reasons of olfactory sensitivity.”
“Am I your first black?” asks Jemima Brown after they have sex.
“He had begun to enjoy the game of estimating the ballistic competence of the various young ladies around the pool…”
“…her wide-cheekboned, oriental face.” “Her eyes too had a Mongol cast…” “…[her] eyes locked on his, expressionless in their Oriental mold…”
“As he showered, he promised himself to use the girl sparingly.”
“In the back of my mind I may be carrying the image of impaling her – stabbing her to death, or something.”
“He was eager to use her as sexual aspirin…”
“She’s on my payroll, and she’s got to do more to earn her keep than just be a spittoon for your sperm.” (At the end of the novel we find out that the girl under discussion is the daughter of the man whose payroll she’s on.)
“It used to be said that British women’s shoes were made by excellent craftsmen who had had shoes carefully described to them, but who had never actually seen a pair firsthand. They were, however, comfortable, and they wore well. And those were also the principal virtues of the women who wore them.”
“But the mountain retained its hymen.”
“I’m yours to do with, man. You could kiss me, or press my hand, or make love to me, or marry me, or talk to me, or hit me,” says Jemima Brown to Jonathan.