The Mindful Child: How to Help Your Kid Manage Stress and Become Happier, Kinder, and More Compassionate

by Susan Kaiser Greenland

Help the children in your life protect themselves with these groundbreaking age-appropriate mindfulness techniques.Mindful awareness works by enabling you to pay closer attention to what is happening within you—your thoughts, feelings, and emotions—so you can better understand what is happening to you. The Mindful Child extends the vast benefits of mindfulness training to children from four to eighteen years old with age-appropriate exercises, songs, games, and fables that Susan Kaiser Greenland has developed over more than a decade of teaching mindful awareness to kids. These fun and friendly techniques build kids’ inner and outer awareness and attention, which positively affects their academic performance as well as their social and emotional skills, such as making friends, being compassionate and kind to others, and playing sports, while also providing tools to manage stress and to overcome specific challenges like insomnia, overeating, ADHD, hyper-perfectionism, anxiety, and chronic pain. When children take a few moments before responding to stressful situations, they allow their own healthy inner compasses to click in and guide them to become more thoughtful, resilient, and empathetic. The step-by-step process of mental training presented in The Mindful Child provides tools from which all children—and all families—will benefit.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction, Buddhism, Psychology, Self Help, Childrens, Teaching

240 pages, Kindle Edition

First published May 4, 2010

About the author

Susan Kaiser Greenland is a bestselling author, globally recognized mindfulness innovator, leader, and mentor. Her new book, Real-World Enlightenment: Discovering Ordinary Magic in Everyday Life, showcases her trademark accessible and joyful approach to life with 50 transformative ideas to help navigate the pressures of modern everyday life. Drawing from global wisdom traditions and scientific insights, Susan also shares stories from her lifetime of being a seeker, wife, and mother, into digestible strategies for everyone.

Her pioneering work in mindfulness education for both children and adults is showcased in her widely translated books, The Mindful Child and Mindful Games as well as the Inner Kids model for schools, teachers, parents and other caregivers.

Many of her guided meditations and resources are accessible on popular apps like Insight Timer and Ten Percent Happier, as well as on her website. Featured in media such as The New York Times and CNN, Susan continues to advance mindfulness globally, and as an Advisory board member at the Tergar Schools Project in Nepal.

Reviews

[Brittany · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a new topic for me, but I was inspired by a workshop I attended that included mindful practices. There's a lot to sink into here and I do believe that it truly works, but I have a hard time convincing myself I can turn this into reality with my own children. For example: this morning I must have appeared frustrated to my four year old son as I chased his younger brother down to get ready for school. He told me, "Mom, take a deep breath. That's what you tell me to do." So I did. And it helped. Not even an hour later as we drove to school I thought it was worth another shot and so we tried to send wishes out for our upcoming day. That same four year old said, "I wish we could all pee in our pants all day long." It's a work in progress.

[Andrew · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is one of those books that will stay on my bookshelf as a reference for a long time. I won't go on too long about it, but it, along with many other books I'm currently looking at on mindfulness, have really helped shape the way I interact with my own children. I don't raise my voice and yell at them from the other room, I go in to them, on their level, and calmly help them resolve issues. And, holy moly, it works. One recent anecdote: my two children were fighting over something (we'll call it object A) and I went into where they were playing, and very calmly asked my daughter if she'd please return it to my son. She did, and even hugged him and said, "I'm sorry." Wow. Mindfulness is an area of study and a way of life that I am quickly embracing in many ways. This particular book was more academic than the one I read by Goldie Hawn, and it seemed to have more examples and exercises to practice on the road to mindfulness. Stress levels are way down in my household. Take a look at this one, parents.

[DJ Walsh]

This book is fantastic - especially if you are just beginning your mindfulness journey... perfect for any age (and not just children and parents)! I highly recommend it - and find myself re-reading it often!

[Stacy · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are some good tips in here for incorporating mindfulness training with your kids, but it reads a bit dry and more like a reference manual for someone looking to teach a mindfulness class to a group of children (rather than parents looking for simple strategies to use with their own children). Some of the simple language she uses to speak about breathing and meditation to children is helpful, though.

[Alysa Volpe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Practical.
Straightforward and useful for children AND adults.
Not all techniques work all the time but the book is full of enough exercises and tips to give you options to try.
Easy and quick read.

[Caitlin Turner · Rating 3 out of 5]

I definitely learned something from the author describing her experiences working on mindfulness with children, but the book still felt a bit narrow and shallow for the subject.

[Akhil Jain · Rating 5 out of 5]

My fav quotes (not a review):
"the boys had worked themselves into such a state that they couldn’t calm down. So I took a snow globe from the bookshelf and wound up the music box at its base. I shook the snow globe, put it down on a table, put my hand on my abdomen, and asked the boys to put their hands on their tummies. Together we felt our breaths move up and down as we watched the snow fall and settle in the globe. My son’s friend was almost gasping as he tried to hold back his tears. When the snow had settled to the bottom of the snow globe, I shook it again. As we watched the water in the globe gradually clear, we felt ourselves breathing. Soon, we could see the figures inside the snow globe and the boys’ breathing had slowed; their bodies had relaxed and calmed. Now we could talk about what had scared them."
"Often physical and mental discomfort will ease simply because part of them is experiencing it with the eye of a curious but dispassionate scientist."
"The New ABCs: Attention, Balance, and Compassion"
"Sympathizing with other people by talking about how their experiences resonate with you tends not to be as helpful as asking questions that point them back toward their own direct experience."
"To paraphrase a great mindfulness teacher, “If you are sunk in the mud, you cannot help others out of it."
"suggest they choose a friend or family member, hopefully someone in the room with them, and silently send friendly wishes specifically tailored for that person. For example: “Daddy, I want you to be happy; I hope all your dreams come true; I want you to be healthy and strong; I want you to feel lots of love in your life; I want you to get home from work early so you can play with me; I hope you feel peaceful and calm;"
"WHAT’S INSIDE THE BOX Take an empty box of Quaker Oats or another cereal and put something fun inside. For example, a set of colorful jacks, a toy car, or Legos. Place it in the middle of the circle of children, or on a table with your own children, and ask them to guess what, besides cereal, could possibly be inside the tall cylindrical box. I’ve heard guesses that ranged from “oatmeal” to “lizards.” After everyone has had a turn guessing, ask the kids questions about what it feels like not to know what’s in the box. Do they want to know? Have there been times in their lives when something was going on and they didn’t know what it was? What was that like? How does it feel to be really curious and eager to discover?"
"Ask them how their bodies feel when they don’t know what is going to happen next. Is it comfortable? Is it uncomfortable? Does anyone feel excited? Ask them if it feels like they have butterflies in their stomachs. See if you and the kids can feel the energy and thrill of not knowing fill the room. If you can, just sit there and breathe, taking it all in. Now they can look inside the box!"
"“When I am angry, my breath is strong like a lion. When I am excited, my breath is like a squirrel running around. When I am sleepy, my breath is slow like a turtle.”"
"Feel the weight of the stuffed animal on your belly. Now imagine that you’re giving the animal a gentle ride with your breath: as you breathe in, your belly fills with air and the animal rocks up; as you breathe out, your belly empties and goes down. Breathing in, the animal rocks up, and breathing out, the animal rocks down. You don’t have to change your breath or do anything at all, just notice how it feels as you breathe in and out. If you like to pretend your stuffed animal is real, you can pretend you’re rocking it to sleep with a gentle ride on your belly as your breath moves in and out."
"Pausing for an instant in the center is similar to the placing movement in Slow and Silent Walking. The instruction for the Pendulum goes something like this: swaying, shifting, swaying, center. Continue your side-to-side movement to the opposite side and then back to center: swaying, shifting, center, swaying, shifting, center."

"and blow on the pinwheel with the mouth, inviting children to pay attention to how their bodies feel taking long breaths. In the second variation, children take short breaths in through the nose and blow short breaths out through their mouth to spin the pinwheel again, paying attention"
"Notice my wording: “Your eyes look blue” as opposed to “Your eyes are blue.” I phrase the greeting to reinforce the objective of observing rather than analyzing. Instead of thinking, “I am angry,” the friendly observer sees that “I have an angry feeling.”
"In this version of the Hello Game, we go around the circle (or dinner table), turning to our neighbor, making eye contact, and saying hello. For example, “Hello, my shoulder feels stiff,” or “Hello, my feet are cold.” Or you can ask a child to say “Hello” and then identify an impression that’s coming through one of his or her senses, like, “Hello, my socks are soft,” or “Hello, I see a globe in the corner of the room,” or “Hello, I smell the cookies baking in the oven,” or “Hello, I taste the mint flavor of my gum,” or “Hello, I hear the furnace roaring in the next room.”"
"Meditation can peel away the layers of mental bric-a-brac that cloud the natural clarity of our minds."
"The plastic monkeys’ arms are shaped like hooks, so kids can make a monkey chain by hanging them arm by arm. It’s a lively, fun way to demonstrate how we relate to thoughts and emotions during introspective practice. Afterward I ask kids what they were distracted by while practicing mindfulness of breathing or Slow and Silent Walking. Kids take turns answering, and every time someone mentions a thought, emotion, or physical sensation, I pull a monkey out of the barrel to represent the distraction and hang it on the chain. Adding monkey after monkey to the chain, I point out that, when practicing mindfulness of breathing, no one monkey (or distraction) is considered more meaningful than another, and that we deal with every distraction in the same way. Regardless of their content, every thought is a distraction and every emotion is another distraction. I ask, “What do we do with distractions when we notice them?” Then comes the children’s favorite part: They call out, “Let them go,” or “Dump them,” and I drop the monkey chain and they clatter back into the barrel before we start all over again."
"You might empower your kids to ring the mindfulness bell whenever they would like the entire family to pause and reflect."
"When something bad happens or when I just feel lousy, the practice is to acknowledge it right away (This broken dishwasher is a complete and total drag) and then quickly give thanks for three things. Any three things at all. The key to this practice is in its immediacy. I don’t analyze what I’m happy about, or what I should be happy about; I just say thank you for the first three things that come to mind. Right now, as I write, I am grateful for Seth, who is sleeping on the couch in the living room; for the roses that are blooming in the yard; and for the fact that Gabe really likes his new role in the school play."
"Letting go of this role, the one in which you are a cross between an army general and a personal valet, and assuming one in which your children are in control, can be difficult,"

[Tracey Cruickshank · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wanted to read this book because Gabriel was having trouble separating to go to school last year and we wanted as much info as possible to help us out. His return to school this fall has been much easier and better for all of us althoughI do anticipate that he will struggle again when he enters kindergarten in a new school come september. Anyway, the first half of this book (well, maybe first third) is pretty good with lots of ideas and such. I do have to admit that I slogged through the last part of it and skipped some non-essential chapters which I may return to as necessary.

[Teague · Rating 2 out of 5]

General mindfulness explained for children. I really found the book wonting in a clearly explained mindfulness based program. There's little exercises interspersed throughout but not a straight up program. I wanted a "Full Catastrophe Living" but for kids. Book is worth reading if you don't already know the benefits of mindfulness and why those benefits are helpful for children. I've found it much more user friendly to subscribe to the Headspace app and am using their kids library with my child.

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am a long-time supporter of Susan Kaiser Greenland's work supporting mindfulness with youth, and I found her original book more supportive of private settings (i.e., in the home) because even though many activities are adapted for secular use, many of the practices are grounded in non-secular origins. Her later book on Mindful Games is better adapted for use in public settings.

[Hima · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book but not for someone starting out on meditation and has no knowledge of it.

[Lukasz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kupując poradniki zwracam uwagę na to czy napisane są w fachowy sposób i czy autor wyraża własne osobiste opinie lub czy opiera się na solidnych badaniach empirycznych. W tym przypadku ma miejsce to drugie. Koncepcja "mindfulness" została zbadana i jej skuteczność oraz pożyteczność potwierdzona jest badaniami. W książce pełno jest odnośników do innych źródeł oraz badań przeprowadzanych na czołowych uniwersytetach. Autorka sama współpracuje z badaczami i organizowała badania wśród dzieci.

Dzięki książce dowiemy się sporo o korzyściach stanu świadomości który określany jest jako "mindfullness" co na polski tłumaczone jest jako uważność.

Bardzo mnie ta koncepcja zainteresowała i uświadomiłem sobie jak ważne jest pracowanie nad sobą. Ludzka świadomość, ludzki mózg ma to do siebie, szczególnie we współczesnym świecie że mocno się rozkojarzeni, traci uwazność, koncentracje i ogólnie rzecz biorąc łatwo może popaść w głęboki stres z którego trudno jest się wyrwać.

Książka zawiera sporo rad dla rodziców, dla dorosłych ludzi którzy po prostu maja sporo do czynienia z dziećmi w różnym wieku. Autorka nawet podkreśla ze to nie jest komicznie poradnik dla rodziców, ale również dla pedagogów.

Co prawda w książce jest trochę odnośników do buddyzmu, te odnośniki są bardzo neutralne i książka ma świecki charakter.

Oprócz sporej ilości wiedzy zawiera tez sporą ilość przykładów które można stosować w życiu codziennym.

Dziwią mnie niskie oceny innych czytelników tej książki. Nie podzielam tych niskich opinii. Książkę oceniam dość dobrze i polecam dla zainteresowanych.

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I jeszcze jedna ważna rzecz przychodzi mi do głowy. Stare, dobrze sprawdzone metody wydają się być najlepsze. I ta książka to potwierdza. Metoda mindfullness jest niektórym osobom dobrze znana pod innymi postaciami. W zależności od wieku dziecka stosuje się różne sposoby, zabawy, ćwiczenia mindfullness. Nawet proste układanie klocków, zbieranie kamyków na plaży jest ćwiczeniem "mindfullness". To co mnie pozytywnie zaskoczyło w tej książce to to ze już dziś wielu z nas stosuje nieświadomie metody mindfullness. Mindfullness można ćwiczyć w każdych warunkach. I nigdy nie jest za późno aby zacząc stosować tą metodę. Dobrze jest też sobie uświadomić, że już się tą metodę nieświadomie stosuje. Podnosi ona jakość naszego życia, życia naszych dzieci.

[Tara · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have been really into all these different books giving different tips and techniques to help my own life, and the lives of my family members at home. I like these books to highlight and reference back so I am definitely a physical copy type person when it comes to insightful books. I am new to getting into mindfulness techniques so I found this book to be informative and easy to to learn to apply mindfulness with my children. I don't expect a book to be able to just change everything like magic, but as I learn from reading a broad range of books like these and share what I learned with my children it gives them more knowledge, and sometimes they really take to it.
I like in the beginning you get some first hand accounts from real people who have stories to talk about applying mindfulness to their situations. The guidelines to practical applications gives good points to really understand how to help apply these techniques in real life situations. I think my favorite section was in chapter 4 reading about what it means to understand paying attention. I enjoyed this and always like reading and learning new things. Thank you Goodreads Giveaways and to the publisher, as well as the author for the gifted copy to review with my own thoughts.

[Luiz Fabricio Calland Cerqueira · Rating 3 out of 5]

O livro tem boas técnicas, e a grande maioria é aplicável tanto com adultos, e suponho que com crianças também. Existem alguns conceitos e analogias sobre Atenção Plena que ela explica melhor, em minha opinião, do que alguns outros grandes nomes da área, como o Siegel e o Kabat-Zin.

Por outro lado, acho que o livro carece de um forte trabalho de edição. Era difícil saber quando suas anedotas acrescentavam, e o quanto, à evolução do que estava sendo proposto. Por vezes, fiquei profundamente entediado, e o último terço do livro, foi custoso para remar.
A impressão que tive é que a autora deve ser uma excelente instrutora de meditação e estudiosa de Atenção Plena, mas enquanto escritora, é na melhor da hipóteses, medíocre.

[Patsy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book explores a wonderful possibility for helping children with a multitude of problems: mindfulness. It requires a lot of effort, but I am optimistic about the possibilities. I have gained from reading this book, but it wasn't quite as helpful as Ms. Greenland's other book, about the application of these principles in the form of mindfulness games.

[Holly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Written mainly for parents and secondarily for teachers, The Mindful Child introduces the concept of mindfulness and how to gently share it with children through games and simple conversation. There are variations for the games that work better with more children (as in, in the classroom), as well as some that would be more suited to one-on-one (parent and child).

[Hilal · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Çocuğunuzun nefes alıp verişi onun iç ve dış dünyası arasındaki kapıdır. 13”
“Öncelikle çocuklarınıza bilinçli olmalarını söylerken kendiniz bilinçli olmazsanız bunu yüzünüze vururlar. İkincisi, gerçekçi olun ve yalnızca doğrudan deneyimlediğiniz şeyleri öğretin. Üçüncüsüyse, esprili olursanız seçtiğiniz yol kısalacaktır. 75”
“Yalnızca doğrudan deneyimlediğiniz şeyi öğretin. 75”
“Basit olsun
Eğlenceli olsun
Esprili olsun 68”
“Pek cazip gelmeyen bir şeyi yapmayı kafamıza koymak, tüm gücünüzle sağlam durup yapmayı düşündüğünüz şeyi yapmak, farkındalık egzersizleri ile geliştirilebilecek fazlasıyla yararlı bir zihin kasıdır. 66”
“Beş neden oyunu. Bir kişi soruları sorarken diğeri cevaplıyor. Soruları soran kişi, diğerinin cevabını dikkatle dinliyor ve aldığı cevabı bir başka soru olarak yeniden yönlendiriyor. 62”
“Hayatı deneyimleme şeklimiz, her şeyden önce söz konusu hayat deneyimiyle karşılaştığımız zamanki zihin yapımızla alakalıdır. 54”
“Çocuklarımızın yollarının kalplerinden geçtiğinden emin olmalıyız. 45”
“Unutmayın; şu an gitmeniz gereken bir yer yok. Yapmanız gereken bir şey yok. Memnun etmeniz gereken biri yok. Olmanız gereken biri yok. Şu an burada sahip olduklarınızdan başka hiçbir şeye ihtiyacınız yok. Şu an yaptığımız tek şey dinlenmek. Ne daha azı ne daha fazlası.” 158
“Vücudunuz dağ gibi, nefesiniz rüzgar gibi, zihniniz gökyüzü gibi olsun.” 113
“Üç tepki; arzu, kaçınma, kayıtsızlık” 166
“Özünüzdeki doğanız zaten her zaman ışıl ışıl, güzel ve eksiksiz; olduğu gibi mükemmel.” 154
“Doğru mu, gerekli mi, nazik mi” 148
“Şu an hiçbir şey, kendinizle ilgilenmekten daha önemli değil” 98
“Floortime” 224
“Yüzyıllar önce haritacılar, henüz keşfetmedikleri yerleri ‘buradan sonra ejderhalar var’ yazarak işaretlerlerdi.” 255
“İç dünyanızda dolaşıp zaten orada olan yeni dünyayı keşfederek bulabileceğiniz pusuladan gözünüzü ayırmayın.” 256

[Julie Patton · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are good ideas and exercises in this book, but I found it lacking for someone who doesn't have a background in classical meditation and mindfulness. I'm having a hard time putting it all together and knowing where to start.

[Paul Eckert · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting read - there are some helpful exercises to help children learn about mindfulness, but also how not to teach them.

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

Will have to revise this after trying some of it out, but it is an interesting approach. Some geared to groups of kids, but some applicable to me and my kids.

[Vandana Sehgal · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you need to bring peace into your house read this book. It provides simple mindful exercises to perform to connect with your child.

[Kyla Belvedere · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am all about mindfulness right now (I hope I can stick with it). Not only am I engaging in mindful practices, I am getting the kids to as well.

This book is a great resource for both parents and teachers. I actually think it might benefit teachers more, as it has a lot of guides to take you through mindfulness practices with older students, which can be adapted for younger. I think this gave me a good starting off point to use with my own children.

[Chong Kah · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very easy to read book. Suitable for parents or teachers who work with young children.

[Katie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I've been hearing stories like this one and thought my kids would probably benefit from something similar at their school, but it's not something their school is doing. So I got this to see if there were things we could do at home that might be helpful.
It assumes the reader is interested in - perhaps already an avid enthusiast of - mindfulness and meditation for his or herself. In other words, it's not for hypocrites, which I respect. What's good for the gosling, etc., etc. But it's not a good fit for our family. Also, a lot of the activities are more well suited for bigger groups of kids, and kids older than mine. There are some things I will try, and it's an interesting perspective, but... we'll see.

[Lise Baltzer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Lise Baltzer om:

Bogen beskriver, hvordan mindfulness kan anvendes i forhold til børn. Den tager udgangspunkt i den forståelse af mindfulness, der lægger vægten den fulde oplevelse af "det nuværende øjeblik". Det er mit faglige og personlige indtryk, at børn er ret gode til den slags i forvejen. At de fra naturens hånd formår at være helt og fuldt til stede i øjeblikket. Der er mange forslag til øvelser for børnene. Farverige og opfindsomme øvelser. Søde og sjove øvelser. Men personligt ville jeg vægte koncentrations-delen af mindfulness-praksis højere, når det gælder børn. Det gælder i hvert fald, når vi taler børn og mindfulness i konkrete settings som skole, pædagogiske institutioner og hjemmet.

[Dayna · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was recommended to me by a child psychologist and I ended up learning so many wonderful things about mindfulness for myself. It comes with a CD that I have done with my kids that I was afraid they'd find hokey, but my 10 year especially liked the relaxtion techniques it takes you through (my 7 year old still can't sit still long enough for them). My oldest has some big changes coming up and he tends to give himself high expectations so stress is an issue with him and this book has been really wonderful, with actual techniques that we know use to help him (and me!) deal with stress and try to remember to live in the moment.

[Elisabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Combined with the Still Quiet Place curriculum, this book has been my bible for teaching mindfulness to children. It's accessible enough to be valuable for anyone who works with or raises kids - those who already have an established practice and want to share it with others, and those are new to mindfulness and are looking for small ways to incorporate it into their own and children's lives. Kaiser Greenland's ideas are fun and less rigid than other "mindfulness for children" method books I've read, but for teaching a whole class on the subject, I think it's still helpful to have a structured curriculum and weave this in.

[Kris · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book. For a Buddhist practitioner, it was a well known application of a concept we know well. For someone new to mindfulness, it's avery well written guide to the benefits of and how to bring it to children to use. No brainwashing, nothing crazy, just simple sitting and awareness. As a Buddhist, I'd be teaching my son these concepts naturally. However, I did find some outstanding advice. For my 2-year old, this is a bit too much but for when he gets older, it's going to be golden.

[adeservingporcupine · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think this is good book to have read on my journey toward mindfulness, but not a great starter book. I had hoped, as someone who is struggling to meditate, it would give me a very step by step approach to teaching children meditation, which would, theoretically, teach me, too. It seemed more for people who already have a meditation base. Lots of interesting games and activities, but those were very much for children and families who already are invested in meditation. Not necessarily a book for teachers whose students are going to need to be convinced that meditation isn't a punishment.

[Bekah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. We've been struggling with helping our child with some degree of anxiety, sensory defensiveness, and other quirks. I appreciated the fact that this book didn't pathologize the need to learn focus, calm, and attention.

I would have given it 5 stars, except for the fact that I don't know enough about the activities and mindfulness in general to use them properly with my child.