Let Go Now: Embrace Detachment as a Path to Freedom

by Karen Casey

“In 200 short, straightforward daily lessons illustrating the many forms that detachment can take in one’s life. Casey’s latest is an easy reference guide for those seeking recovery or peace.” — Publishers Weekly #1 New Release in Personality Disorders and Twelve-Step Programs
End codependency now.  Do you ever feel like you might be giving other people too much power over your mood? Do you find yourself feeling immobilized by expectations and demands? The cure for codependency is detachment, says Karen Casey, best-selling author of over forty books that have helped fans around the world. Letting go.  When we remove codependent relationships and codependent behavior from our lives, we discover a life of balance and freedom. Detach from emotions and circumstances that are not in your control. Find your balance point and learn how to reach it, whether you find yourself tempted to become enmeshed in other people’s problems or rushing to their rescue. Letting life in.  Is where we are intentional? Why is every moment an opportunity? Using 200 meditations, Karen reminds us that we cannot control anyone or anything beyond ourselves. Inspiring and easy to read,  Let Go Now  guides us away from taking care of others, and toward taking care of ourselves. If you agree that recovery works and enjoyed other codependency books like  Codependent No More ,  Journey to the Heart , or  The Language of Letting Go ; you’ll love Karen Casey's  Let Go Now .

Genres: Self Help, Psychology, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Spirituality, Relationships, Love

232 pages, Paperback

First published August 1, 2010

About the author

Karen Casey, Ph.D., has spoken on spirituality, relationships, and personal growth for more than twenty years. She is the author of twenty books devoted to the enhancement of one's personal and spiritual journey.

Her first book, Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women has sold more than three million copies. Casey is a popular public speaker on the spirituality conference circuit, and she is passionate about helping others in Twelve Step support groups where her own recovery from addiction began more than three decades ago. Cultivating Hope: Weekly Readings to Open Your Heart and Mind is her latest book.

She shares her time between her homes in Minnesota and Florida.

Reviews

[Jo B · Rating 1 out of 5]

I barely started this book and couldn't get past the introduction which repeated the idea that detachment is letting go and letting God take control. I wish I knew it was a book focused on those who are religious before I paid my money on it.
Waste of time and a waste of money for anyone who is actually interested in taking responsibility for themselves rather than "letting God be in control"

[MountainAshleah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book packs a very powerful message--a life changing message, one I needed to hear 30 years ago. Or even last year! I would have saved myself months and months of personal heartache, exhaustion, and chaos if I'd been able to say to myself, "This is their journey--they created this mess, and they have to grow from it" instead of trying to help two grown adults sort out the wreck of their lives, only to be told, "YOU DIDN'T DO ENOUGH FOR US." Neither did their neighbors, hired help, and assorted government agencies.

Well then. Had I been armed with Karen Casey's book . . . I would have been able to pay attention to my own yellow flag about these people, instead of ignoring it. But I wasn't armed with this book or its message of healthy detachment. And now I am. Not only have I tempered my impulse to have to "help" certain people, but I have also learned to sit back, listen, process, and quit ignoring the yellow flags when they go off, no matter what the situation--at work, too. Casey's messages are many, but this is one quote I especially like and now practice: "Silence is a solution. Always. A peaceful, rewarding one."

Although the detachment message works beautifully for me, the means by which Casey delivers the message has some challenges (4 stars instead of 5). She relies heavily (and repeatedly) on Christian thought and activity, as well as tenets of the 12-step process. This scaffolding didn't bother me, but it could interfere with other readers, as Casey can be quite heavy-handed at times. I also don't agree with the tired and tiring "nothing is by accident/everything is by design" mantra and really had to stop myself from letting my resistance interfere with the overall message and experience I needed--which was giving myself permission to detach. My life has been better for it. My mother would call this pulling back "selfish." I call it survival, especially in a society that condones and even encourages people to manufacture hysteria and then expect others to become absorbed by it. Overall, this book is a blessing I just so happened to find on the library shelf . . . and perhaps, in that case, there was no accident!

[Ibyang · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do nothing. What a concept. With what frequency does your mind savor the idea of doing nothing when a partner or friend pushes your buttons? Probably not very often, unless you have already acquired some understanding of the pitfalls of being too attached to the whims, the behavior, or the attitudes and opinions of others. Simply walking away when our ego really wants to scream in retaliation is not easy. In fact, it may feel nearly impossible. But it can be done. I know; I have learned to do it.

Not responding — in other words, detaching — doesn’t mean we don’t care what the other person is doing or saying to or about us. We may care a great deal. But we have to ask ourselves, Will it help this situation for me to say something? If it honestly will, try to speak lovingly; but in most instances, letting the moment pass will be more fruitful. Adding fuel to the embers of an ugly incident will cause it to erupt into flames that can easily get out of control. We have all been there. We don’t ever have to go there again.

''We cannot rely on our judgment when our emotions are out of control. Take a minute before you respond... Pause... Breathe... Pray.''

[S · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book about respecting others journey, respecting our own journey and detaching yourself from the definitions and opinions of others. Karen Casey is an incredible woman. I bought this book after listening to an interview she did on Steve Maraboli radio show. Incredible interview and an incredible book. This is a must read.

[Vasundhara Prakash · Rating 2 out of 5]

Nothing that you don't already know. But it's good to have things told to you again. Though the ultimate way to practice detachment according to this book is through God, so if you're a non-believer, the book doesn't give you another way to "embrace detachment"- that was a bit of a let down.

[Sarah ♡ (let’s interact!) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Learn to let go of what you cannot control, to find inner peace, with Let Go Now. 💖

Read on the Headway app, which condenses non-fiction books by their key-points to maximise quicker and more helpful learning. ✨🧠🖤

[Daniel Noventa · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ehh... Gods damn this book, I was expecting real advice instead... it's just advice on letting someone else take control. Not practical, and highly unreadable. It was moderately amusing changing god to Athena and him to Her, but that didn't last. Was looking for real advice, got a lot of unscientific and useless crap. I need to do some research on authors, since Amazon reviews are less than reliable sources on what is a good book.

[Ying Ying · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is the perfect book when you need to let something or someone go. Read meditation by meditation until you feel you have reached the desired state; the rest is just additional reminder. I had all I needed once I reached about 60% of the book.

[LemontreeLime · Rating 1 out of 5]

Could not get past the constant beating over the head of everything Alcoholics Anon in this. Just a little too heavy handed for me.

[Travel Writing · Rating 2 out of 5]

Based solidly on the 12 Steps and painfully white, christian, god-god-god-god-god-god heavy.

Look, it is a helpful, albeit redundant little book. Truthfully, it is the same 12 platitudes repeated ad naseum.

I am not resentful that I bought it, since I do pick it up and read a couple 'chapters" (which are one to two paragraphs long each, so about three minutes or less of reading) and find it helpful is small doses.

I am resentful that NO WHERE on the Amazon page, or any descriptor or anywhere, even on the cover, does it say that it is christian literature, because I wouldn't have bought it if I had known that gaaaaaaaaaawd was going to be mentioned in every sentence. This withholding seems utterly on purpose, even the author bio speaks of 'women's spirituality" and 'spiritual growth", as covers to the face-punching christianity that fills this book.

[Grace · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book I keep next to my reading chair because I often pick it up and read it until I feel centered with the message. It's helped me to learn what detachment means, the benefits of detachment, and the need to continually relearn the message of detachment. I've read it from cover to cover at least twice and when I'm done, I start over again.

[Leonor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent. One of the very rare self help books that I consider worth reading. I have read it and have it in audiobooks to hear it while doing stuff. It has help me have an easier happier daily life.

[Cara Hinton · Rating 3 out of 5]

A great book to help detach from others lives. If you're struggling with being too involved with a person or many people and their lives, this is a great book to help learn why detaching not only makes sense for you, it makes a lot of sense for others. A must read for anyone in Al-Anon.

[Tammy · Rating 1 out of 5]

I only read half this book, but I'm counting it as fully read because 1) it's so repetitive I can't possibly have missed much and 2) I'm willing to give myself full credit just for putting up with it as long as I did.

This book infuriated me. If I'd had a physical copy and not the e-book, I'd have thrown it across the room. Not only is it repetitive, it's poorly written, doesn't give any actual advice on *how* to do what the author recommends, and is so God-centric as to be unbearable. What the author is arguing isn't detachment; it's replacing our attachment to living, breathing humans with attachment to a supernatural being instead. Which might be great for people who believe in some version of God but doesn't do a damn thing for those who don't or those who question. And don't even get me started on the idea that no matter what anyone else does, we aren't supposed to care or react or apparently feel anything at all. But yet we're still supposed to care about them and believe they care about us?

The worst part is that the author isn't 100% off base. There's actually kernels of useful info here, but instead of being elaborated on or any kind of nuance provided, they're tossed out and then buried under such a lot of nothing (other than "let God handle it all", which to me is code for "you don't have to take responsibility or expect anyone else to, either") as to be worthless.

[Beth McGee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was fantastic. It does have a bit of a "higher power" tinge to it, so if that turns you off, you may be irritated about it. However, even as a person who that sort of thing does bug, I recommend this book all the time to people in a circle of families who experience loved ones living with mental illness. It would be a great book for anyone struggling to set boundaries and make choices for their own well being in the midst of the chaos others bring into their lives.

I also appreciate that it's set up like a daily devotional in that there's over 100 inspirational passages on boundaries, letting go, caring 'about' people as opposed to caring 'for' people. It is a very important book that repeatedly reiterates the important messages so you can't forget them!

[Sanjoy · Rating 5 out of 5]

By and large we all know what to do in our lives, however what this book does it to re-validate this philosophy and makes us to work towards this. This book would help you to chalk out all the grey areas in your mind and try to turn them in black and white.
The sequence is exquisite and the timing of the sentences are near perfection.

However this is something which you may not be able to grasp in one attempt, you might be required to read it again and again, as this is a knowledge that would come with time with significant practice. This is a philosophy, which would be become your journey through life.

[Daphsam · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Let Go Now" offers invaluable insights into the art of stepping back from others and disentangling oneself from their issues and lives. It serves as a guiding light, directing readers towards reclaiming their focus and nurturing their individuality. The book underscores the significance of the phrase "There is my business and none of my business," a transformative concept that's crucial for personal growth. With its profound lessons, "Let Go Now" empowers readers to rediscover themselves and navigate life with renewed clarity and purpose.

[Karel · Rating 4 out of 5]

In truth I've set this aside without finishing it. Not because I didn't like it, but because it did the trick. I will likely pick it back up again some date in the future, but right now I don't need it. I read an entry each day, and journaled my thoughts on each. As with any book of this kind, some entries resonated and a few did not. But it's a good book for a bit of self-guided therapy and I do recommend it.

[Annie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first heard about this book from a friend who offered to go through page by page starting at the beginning. Every morning we would text each other what we got out of each page. I read ahead and finished writing my takeaways from each one. We have also been sharing our Pause and Reflect exercises with each other too. I highly recommend it!

[Jo · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was the best Al Anon/codependency book I have read with strong message of “Live and Let Live”. From the start to end it felt like a warm poetry. Listening to this book twice helped me to process some thoughts and clear my mind, which granted me ten hours of good sleep, and most importantly my serenity.

[Katherine Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really good book for anyone with people pleasing tendencies and boundary issues. Relies heavily on Christian references of prayer and god and refers to over involvement in people’s lives as “controlling them.” But if you can apply your own language in place of those references if those don’t resonate with you it can be extremely helpful.

[Debra Waites · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a terrific reminder of the importance of minding one's own life, of setting boundaries and why boundaries are important. Easy to read and understand, profound enough to contemplate, short meditations to consider daily.

[Karen Anfuso · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderful book - daily snippet - great reminder to stay in your own lane and emphasis on "my business" or "none of my business". It is in my basket of daily reads with too many highlights and underlinings :)

[Marissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book brought me great comfort and peace. To a degree, I think everyone has trouble letting go and practicing the power or surrendering and releasing. This book, coupled with Casey’s insightful meditations, allow you to look at detachment as a spiritual, freeing solution to your problems.

[~ laura ~ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really good book about detachment. She gave very practical advice and encouragement about the tools to use to get adept at this important skill. It takes practice, over & over & over. Also love her interweaving the principles of recovery throughout. Enjoyed this one a bunch.

[Donna Avery · Rating 5 out of 5]

The perfect practice for a powerful life

I've recommend this book to everyone. We all need to practice living detachment. This book shows you how and why. It has changed my life for the better and given me freedom.

[Des Collings · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was overall a good read. Trying to implement detachment in a skillful way is difficult but she had some good tips for going about it. A lot of repetition but she admits that's on purpose for teaching different angles.

[Ivi Charette · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you need some guidance on how to implement boundaries and have difficulty saying no and or prioritizing yourself, this is a book you should read - I thankful I came across this book this moment in my life.

[Heather]

This is definitely something I need to read!!

[Maryann · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this woman. I have suffered the same exact childhood and the pain is still with me. Thanks for helping me find ways to deal with it.