3.5
Taken from the Library of America's edition of Agee's fiction (plus Let Us Now...). I also read the three short stories included at the end, all of which were quite good. "A Mother's Tale" features talking cows, namely a mother cow who can't stop herself from telling an absolutely horrifying story to her calves.
I've decided to spend 2022 working through Agee's work after a brief but potent encounter with the first 50 pages of Let Us Now Praise Famous Men, a work that ended up being unlike anything I'd expected. (I remember being glad it had been cut from my Southern Lit. grad class, simply because it sounded so boring. Now I'm envious of whatever alternate universe me who got to read it with that professor.) With yet another unpredictable and potentially demanding semester on the horizon, I've shelved that book for now, instead focusing on texts I can chip away at every day (Cheever's journals, Ross Gay's Book of Delights) or that I can read in a few days.
Hence this novella, which was . . . pretty good! I've got McCarthy and Joyce on the brain (especially with the Ulysses centenary coming up), but it's hard to not make connections between Agee and those others here. Agee's fiction is mostly autobiographical, from what I can gather, and the city of Knoxville is a prominent feature in his writing, making him a logical follow-up to my reading of Suttree. And apparently he was enraptured by Ulysses when it appeared in the U.S. This novella in particular reminded me of Portrait of the Artist: the lengthy middle section depicts the grueling loop a young boy's mind can fall into when contemplating sin and grace, and the young boy in question, Richard (a clear Agee stand-in), lives and goes to school at the church (which I think is Episcopal?), looked over by priests both avuncular and cruel. The story takes place on Good Friday, starting with the boys waking up in the middle of the night to say their prayers in the church and keep watch, so to speak, as they await the morning. There's some heavy-handed symbolism, particularly near the end (an actual snake appears), and it gets a tad boring at times, but that middle section: that's done quite well. Here's an excerpt I typed up:
“He looked proudly at the monstrance and felt strength and well-being stand up straight inside him, and self-esteem as well; for it began to occur to him that not many people would even know this for the terrible sin it was, or would feel a contrition so deep, or would have the courage truly and fully, in all of its awful shamefulness, to confess it: and again the strength and the self-esteem fell from him and he was aghast in the knowledge that still again in this pride and complacency he had sinned and must still again confess; and again that in recognizing this newest sin as swiftly as it arose, and in repenting it and determining to confess it as well, he had in a sense balanced the offense and restored hiss well-being and his self-esteem; and again in that there was evil, and again in the repenting of it there was good and evil as well, until it began to seem as if he were tempted into eternal wrong by rightness itself or even the mere desire for rightness and as if he were trapped between them, good and evil, as if they were mirrors laid face to face as he had often wished he could see mirrors, truly reflecting and extending each other forever upon the darkness their meeting, their facing, created, and he in the dark middle between them, and there was no true good and no true safety in any effort he might ever make to realize or repent a wrong but only a new temptation which his very soul itself seemed powerless to resist; for was not this sense of peace, of strength, of well-being, itself a sin? yet how else could a forgiven or forgivable soul possibly feel, or a soul in true contrition or self-punishment? I’m a fool to even try, he groaned to himself, and he felt contempt for every moment of well-being he could recall, which had come of the goodness of a thought or word or deed. Everything goes wrong, he realized. Everything anyone can ever do for himself goes wrong."