You’re Overthinking It: Find Lifelong Love By Being Your True Self

by Sabrina Alexis Bendory

You’re Overthinking It: How to Find Lifelong Love by Being Your True Self is the ultimate guide to understanding relationships and learning the necessary skills to find and keep a happy, loving, and mutually fulfilling relationship.

Do you wonder why it’s so hard for you to have the life and love you want? Do you feel powerless in your relationships, like you’re at the mercy of someone else, feeling like you’re chasing a relationship instead of choosing it? Do you get caught in an endless, obsessive, analytical loop trying to understand why nothing works out? Do you find yourself dating the same copy-paste versions of people over and over? Do you know what it takes to have true, lasting love? Do you know the red flags to watch out for and how to be the kind of person that easily and effortlessly gets what they want in life? Do you understand why things haven’t quite worked out the way you wanted them to?

Acclaimed relationship expert Sabrina Alexis Bendory answers all of these questions and more, sharing everything you need to know to find and keep love that lasts.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Mental Health, Personal Growth, Health

312 pages, Paperback

Published January 23, 2023

Reviews

[Heeju Park · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book has made me realize how I overthink a lot and it made me more aware of my behaviors (alongside with therapy). It is definitely encouraging me to be better when it comes to relationships and see situations from the other side.

[WitchyKiki · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF 38%

This book literally overthinks itself.

[Bea · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book! It gave a lot of answers while also making me think a lot. I found the information really helpful and since I read it I really stopped overthinking.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Liked it, but there were some moments that felt criticizy versus inspiring

[Alex · Rating 5 out of 5]

Some parts weren’t exactly applicable to my life at this current moment, but just solid advice for anyone in a relationship or looking for one. Especially with people who tend to be anxious in their relationships (aka— the over-thinkers).

[Anna Hartzell · Rating 5 out of 5]

so many inspiring quotes and things about relationships that i think everyone could benefit from.

[Brittany Tomore · Rating 3 out of 5]

felt like a lot of the book was very repetitive but still was able to get a lot out of it.

[Jenavieve Tavernier · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really loved this book, could be repetitive at times but really made me think more about how women and men see relationships.

[Maram · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked this book because it wakes you up. Like… yeah. True. Shes right. Its the kind of book I keep around as a reminder, and I go back to it sometimes just to re-hear things I already know (but need someone to yell at me again)

I gave it 5 stars not because its groundbreaking or life changing, but because its light, smooth, and im flying through it which is exactly my type of book. The kind that doesn’t drain you but still gives you something to chew on.

Now. Here’s the thing. It is a little far from my personal beliefs, and thats expected (its translated), and the author clearly relies on herself 100%. There’s this exaggerated “I can do it, I am powerful, I made it happen all by myself” vibe that lowkey annoyed me. Like okay girl good for you, but personally? I literally cant imagine “moving on” or “healing” or even thinking straight without allah guiding me. So yeah, that part was a bit off for me.

Also? Sometimes im like… isn’t this just common sense? But then again maybe im just too smart. Thats a possibility.

Bonus info: im not even in a relationship. Never been. But I like reading and learning about men and relationships its interesting, and I want to be mentally prepared if anything ever happens. So this is part of my academic research🤷🏻‍♀️

Anyway, 5 stars for the reminders, the smooth flow, and for making me feel like im in a TedTalk with a friend who kinda yells but means well

[Aqilah Raissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

“You’re Overthinking It” is a must-read for anyone who finds themselves stuck in a cycle of doubt, insecurity, or overanalyzing their relationships. True to its title, the book gently but firmly reminds readers that we often worry about things that don’t truly matter, especially when it comes to love and relationships.

Reading this book helped me regain clarity and reflect on the importance of self-love and self-worth before entering or maintaining a relationship. It reinforced the idea that a strong foundation within ourselves leads to healthier connections with others. One of the most valuable lessons I took away was understanding how to interpret and navigate men’s perspectives in relationships, which provided me with a newfound sense of confidence and awareness.

I highly recommend this book to anyone who struggles with overthinking in their personal life or relationships. It’s insightful, relatable, and packed with practical advice that can truly shift your mindset!

[Halle Shannon · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good book! I actually received this as a gift from a friend, and while reading it I bought two copies to give to other friends of mine. Whether you’re in a marriage, looking to start a new relationship, or single, this is a book that is worth a read. It asks you to do some introspection on who you are, how you behave, and what behaviors might be getting in your way of receiving what it is that you want or need. It talks in gendered terms, so there is reference to “men” and “women” in relationships, but the author takes a moment to talk about what she means by masculine and feminine energy and that it isn’t necessarily a gendered thing in reality, but is a starting point for conversation. I will be trying to reflect more as I continue throughout my week, and will keep this book on the shelf for some revisits as I grow and learn more about myself.

[Bookwises · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked up You’re Overthinking It because I always end up overanalyzing my relationships. This book was like a warm but honest conversation with a friend who wants the best for you. Sabrina Alexis Bendory explains why we feel powerless in love sometimes and how to break out of that mindset. I appreciated her focus on self-worth and authenticity instead of just giving dating hacks. The writing is simple, relatable, and actionable. I finished it feeling lighter and clearer about what I want and how to be true to myself in love. Definitely recommend to anyone who struggles with anxiety in dating or feels stuck in the same patterns.

[Jawaher :) · Rating 3 out of 5]

To be honest, I bought this book because I am an over-thinker and I thought that this book is going to drag me out of my maze. But I was a little bit disappointed when figuring out that the whole thing is about male-female relationship. I had to skip few chapters since not all of them are actually applicable to my case.
With that stated, I did benefit from the content though. There are lots of useful pieces of advice that I could relate to.

[Vivu · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sách đã được dịch, tên là "Tâm lý học tình yêu".
Cuốn sách gối đầu giường cho các bạn nữ đang muốn thoát khỏi lối mòn tiêu cực trong mối quan hệ tình yêu. Không chỉ dạy chiêu trò mà tác giả phân tích kỹ về động cơ và tư duy ảnh hưởng đến hành động như thế nào. Thật sự rất hay.

[laurennrushing · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an excellent book on relationships and growth from start to finish. Whether you’re in a relationship, single, male or female - there is something for everyone in this book when it comes to perspectives on ourselves and our relationships

[Simran · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not usually my preferred genre, but I loved it. I found it insightful and well-written.

[Tasha · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a decent read, but I skipped through some parts. While there were aspects that I liked, others didn't entirely align with my views.

[Anna Azarenko]

Особливо візьму (взяла) пораду по 2 -3 за що ти вдячна, нове (!), кожен день 👍

[Randall Quesada · Rating 3 out of 5]

Charlotte York would absolutely love this book.

[Tenley Goodwin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book. Took so many of things in this book to heart and is truly changing my way of thinking. She had so many good pointers in this book to helping you find your life long love.

[Courtney Lamb · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another book that helped me get over a break up

[Inês · Rating 3 out of 5]

(3,5) eu gostei mas houve partes em que fiquei meio ???? Porque parecia que o ponto era “tens que estar sempre smiling e giggling senão ele vai se fartar de ti”. Não curti muito essa visão

[Memi ✧₊⁺🪿 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don’t Overthink It?? More like I absolutely DID overthink everything after reading this.

I didn’t expect it to hit me like that?? I was just vibing and then suddenly I’m crying and spiraling and questioning every single decision I’ve ever made. The way it talks about overthinking felt so real. Like it was gently dragging me but also hugging me at the same time.

Now I’m overanalyzing everything from what I text people to what I said three years ago in a random convo. But somehow that feels… okay? Like it gave me tools but also validated me at the same time??

Anyway. Read it. Overthink it. Cry a little. 10/10 experience 🫣