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Magnificent Desolation: The Long Journey Home From the Moon
Buzz Adrin will be a hero to you after you read this book. A first hand look into the golden age of the space program plus a look at his remarkably interesting and inspiring life. Printed in Great Britain.
336 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2009
135 people are currently reading
2948 people want to read
About the author
Buzz Aldrin
84 books259 followersBuzz Aldrin (born Edwin Eugene Aldrin, Jr., January 20, 1930) is an engineer and former American astronaut, and the second person to walk on the Moon. He was the lunar module pilot on Apollo 11, the first manned lunar landing in history. He set foot on the Moon at 03:15:16 (UTC) on July 21, 1969, following mission commander Neil Armstrong. He is also a retired colonel in the United States Air Force (USAF) and a Command Pilot.
Aldrin was born in Glen Ridge, New Jersey, to Edwin Eugene Aldrin, Sr., a career military man, and his wife Marion (née Moon). He is of Scottish, Swedish, and German ancestry. After graduating from Montclair High School in 1946, Aldrin turned down a full scholarship offer from MIT, and went to the US Military Academy at West Point, New York. The nickname "Buzz" originated in childhood: the younger of his two elder sisters (Fay Ann) mispronounced "brother" as "buzzer", and this was shortened to Buzz. Aldrin made it his legal first name in 1988.
Buzz Aldrin graduated third in his class at West Point in 1951, with a Bachelor of Science degree in mechanical engineering. He was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in the US Air Force and served as a jet fighter pilot during the Korean War. He flew 66 combat missions in F-86 Sabres and shot down two Mikoyan-Gurevich MiG-15 aircraft.
Subsequent to the war, Aldrin was assigned as an aerial gunnery instructor at Nellis Air Force Base in Nevada, and next was an aide to the dean of faculty at the US Air Force Academy. He flew F-100 Super Sabres as a flight commander at Bitburg Air Base, West Germany, in the 22d Fighter Squadron. In 1963 Aldrin earned a Doctor of Science degree in astronautics from MIT. His graduate thesis was "Line-of-sight guidance techniques for manned orbital rendezvous", the dedication of which read, "In the hopes that this work may in some way contribute to their exploration of space, this is dedicated to the crew members of this country’s present and future manned space programs. If only I could join them in their exciting endeavors!" On completion of his doctorate, he was assigned to the Gemini Target Office of the Air Force Space Systems Division in Los Angeles before his selection as an astronaut. His initial application to join the astronaut corps was rejected on the basis of having never been a test pilot; that prerequisite was lifted when he re-applied and was accepted into the third astronaut class, the first selection for which he was eligible.
Aldrin was selected as part of the third group of NASA astronauts selected in October 1963. After the deaths of the original Gemini 9 prime crew, Elliot See and Charles Bassett, Aldrin and Jim Lovell were promoted to back-up crew for the mission. The main objective of the revised mission (Gemini 9A) was to rendezvous and dock with a target vehicle, but when this failed, Aldrin improvised an effective exercise for the craft to rendezvous with a co-ordinate in space. He was confirmed as pilot on Gemini 12. Aldrin set a record for EVA, demonstrating that astronauts could work outside spacecraft.
On July 21, 1969, he became the second astronaut to walk on the Moon, keeping his record total EVA time until that was surpassed on Apollo 14. Aldrin's first words on the Moon were "Beautiful view. Magnificent desolation."
After leaving NASA, Aldrin was assigned as the Commandant of the USAF Test Pilot School at Edwards AFB, California. In March 1972, Aldrin retired from active duty after 21 years of service, and returned to the Air Force in a managerial role, but his career was blighted by personal problems. His autobiographies Return to Earth, published in 1973, and Magnificent Desolation, published in June 2009, both provide accounts of his struggles with clinical depression and alcoholism in the years following his NASA career. His life improved considerably when he recognized and sought treatment for his problems. Since retiring from NASA, he has continued to promote space exploration.
Aldrin was born in Glen Ridge, New Jersey, to Edwin Eugene Aldrin, Sr., a career military man, and his wife Marion (née Moon). He is of Scottish, Swedish, and German ancestry. After graduating from Montclair High School in 1946, Aldrin turned down a full scholarship offer from MIT, and went to the US Military Academy at West Point, New York. The nickname "Buzz" originated in childhood: the younger of his two elder sisters (Fay Ann) mispronounced "brother" as "buzzer", and this was shortened to Buzz. Aldrin made it his legal first name in 1988.
Buzz Aldrin graduated third in his class at West Point in 1951, with a Bachelor of Science degree in mechanical engineering. He was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in the US Air Force and served as a jet fighter pilot during the Korean War. He flew 66 combat missions in F-86 Sabres and shot down two Mikoyan-Gurevich MiG-15 aircraft.
Subsequent to the war, Aldrin was assigned as an aerial gunnery instructor at Nellis Air Force Base in Nevada, and next was an aide to the dean of faculty at the US Air Force Academy. He flew F-100 Super Sabres as a flight commander at Bitburg Air Base, West Germany, in the 22d Fighter Squadron. In 1963 Aldrin earned a Doctor of Science degree in astronautics from MIT. His graduate thesis was "Line-of-sight guidance techniques for manned orbital rendezvous", the dedication of which read, "In the hopes that this work may in some way contribute to their exploration of space, this is dedicated to the crew members of this country’s present and future manned space programs. If only I could join them in their exciting endeavors!" On completion of his doctorate, he was assigned to the Gemini Target Office of the Air Force Space Systems Division in Los Angeles before his selection as an astronaut. His initial application to join the astronaut corps was rejected on the basis of having never been a test pilot; that prerequisite was lifted when he re-applied and was accepted into the third astronaut class, the first selection for which he was eligible.
Aldrin was selected as part of the third group of NASA astronauts selected in October 1963. After the deaths of the original Gemini 9 prime crew, Elliot See and Charles Bassett, Aldrin and Jim Lovell were promoted to back-up crew for the mission. The main objective of the revised mission (Gemini 9A) was to rendezvous and dock with a target vehicle, but when this failed, Aldrin improvised an effective exercise for the craft to rendezvous with a co-ordinate in space. He was confirmed as pilot on Gemini 12. Aldrin set a record for EVA, demonstrating that astronauts could work outside spacecraft.
On July 21, 1969, he became the second astronaut to walk on the Moon, keeping his record total EVA time until that was surpassed on Apollo 14. Aldrin's first words on the Moon were "Beautiful view. Magnificent desolation."
After leaving NASA, Aldrin was assigned as the Commandant of the USAF Test Pilot School at Edwards AFB, California. In March 1972, Aldrin retired from active duty after 21 years of service, and returned to the Air Force in a managerial role, but his career was blighted by personal problems. His autobiographies Return to Earth, published in 1973, and Magnificent Desolation, published in June 2009, both provide accounts of his struggles with clinical depression and alcoholism in the years following his NASA career. His life improved considerably when he recognized and sought treatment for his problems. Since retiring from NASA, he has continued to promote space exploration.
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May 29, 2025
Have you ever come second in a race, losing by a head? Or come as a runner-up in a competition when there had to be a tiebreak? Or perhaps you have always played second fiddle in some plum role? Now add into this fantasy, the idea that your race was a once in a lifetime event, and one which only a handful of people would ever experience. How do you feel?
Now answer this question, "Who was the first person to land on the moon?" OK - Everybody knows it was Neil Armstrong. They might even know the date, 20th July 1969, and the name of the mission "Apollo 11". But only people who remember watching it on TV, and getting caught up in all the excitement, may remember who was the second man on the moon. For people of a certain age, it is akin to knowing what you were doing when President Kennedy got shot. Yet the "runner-up", who stepped on the moon's surface a mere 20 minutes after Neil Armstrong, was the next out of the module and down the ladder not because he was not the senior officer, but by a mere fluke. For technical reasons, he happened to be sitting further away in the spacecraft. He is rarely mentioned in the history books, yet this event has overshadowed his entire life. His name is Buzz Aldrin.
Magnificent Desolation: The Long Journey Home from the Moon is the second of two autobiographies written by Buzz Aldrin, the first being, "Return to Earth". Magnificent Desolation was transcribed by Ken Abraham, and published in June 2009. The words, "Beautiful, beautiful, magnificent desolation" were the first words spoken by Buzz Aldrin when he stepped onto the moon.
The book is partly a description of the technical aspects of the landing, and partly an overview of space travel not only before and since, but also its future prospects. Also, a large part of the book is a history of the fallout and repercussions of the mission for Buzz Aldrin on a personal level. It is a raw and frank account, with perhaps not as much bitterness as the reader might expect.
Many people were involved in the historic flight. John F. Kennedy had promised the American people, on 25th May 1961, that by the end of the decade they would have landed on the moon. Perhaps this was a rash promise. But it came about because of the political climate at the time - the competition with Russia - and was very much in tune with the burgeoning optimism at the beginning of the sixties, that anything was possible. And it became up to NASA to make it so.
"The National Aeronautics and Space Administration", or NASA, had been established in 1958 as a direct response to the Soviet launch of the world's first artificial satellite, "Sputnik 1" on October 4, 1957. On 12th April 1961, the newspapers world-wide were full of stories about the Russian cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin, who had orbited Earth. Not to be outdone amid throes of the Cold War, a USA astronaut made a sub-orbital ride 62 miles up to the edge of space on the 5th May. A mere 3 weeks later Kennedy made his momentous promise to the nation.
Mission followed mission, all carefully documented in this book. Usually a team of three would be chosen, the astronauts themselves being given little choice in the matter. It was not at that time a career choice to be an astronaut. Astronauts were cherry-picked from the Air Force, and given special training. Again, it was mere chance that Buzz Aldrin's name came up for this flight out of the super-fit, intelligent and trained officers who had been chosen for the scheme. Equally, it was chance that put astronaut Michael Collins a short distance away from the moon's surface, piloting the command spacecraft of "Apollo 11", "Columbia", after the undocking and separation of the lunar module, "Eagle", for the entire time. This third member of the team did not enter the "Eagle" or step onto the moon at all in this mission. And no, unsurprisingly, he doesn't always make it into the history books either.
Despite the historical content, Magnificent Desolation starts, as all good stories do, with an exciting event before subsequently backtracking. So it starts with a description of the landing itself, which dramatically came within seconds of failure. Buzz Aldrin says that when he and Neil Armstrong were ready in "Eagle", he noticed a pungent metallic smell,
"There in the dust on the floor on the right side of the cabin, lay a circuit breaker switch that had broken off... the broken switch had snapped off from the engine-arm circuit breaker - the vital breaker needed to send electrical power to the ascent engine that would lift Neil and me off the moon."
He deduced that one of the two astronauts must have bumped it accidentally with their cumbersome backpacks. It would have to be pushed back in again for the ascent engine to ignite, to get the astronauts back home. At this point in the text it becomes clear how much of a team effort this all was. He reported it to mission control, debating with Houston how to work around the circuit, in case it had to be left open. He knew that one key computer expert would either manage to calculate how to solve the problem, without using the circuit breaker, or else the whole mission would be aborted (and of course they would die.) His training clicked in. He left it with NASA and went to sleep.
Overnight he came up with a possible solution, wacky though it seemed; a humble felt-tipped pen! He inserted it into the small opening where the circuit breaker switch should have been pushed in,
"Sure enough the circuit breaker held. We were going to get off the moon after all. To this day I still have the broken circuit breaker switch and the felt-tipped pen I used to ignite our engines."
Not all of the space missions, by any means, were covered in glory. Buzz Aldrin reminds us that much later, on 1st February 2003, the "Columbia" space shuttle disintegrated shortly after its launch. All 7 aboard died. The three further shuttles which had been planned were immediately cancelled, and the decision was made that manned space missions would be phased out by 2010. What catastrophe had there been, which would result in such a tragedy? A tiny part of the insulating layer had broken off. This small piece would have weighed approximately one pound, yet it had disastrous ramifications. And it further demonstrated to both the author and the reader how trivial episodes could influence the success or failure of a mission.
An earlier disaster occurred on 11th April 1970, on "Apollo 13" - the 7th manned space flight, but only the second mission after the first moon landing. It is now classed by NASA as a "successful failure". Buzz Aldrin is adamant that NASA's first priority is always the safety of the astronauts. He was always certain that their lives would be uppermost and come first, irrespective of the potential lost opportunities for gaining knowledge, the financial implications etcetera. The example he cites is "Apollo 13", manned by Jim Lovell, John Swigert and Fred Haise. An oxygen tank exploded - then a second one also exploded. The electricity, heating, lights and water all went out as a consequence. Yet the astronauts themselves came home safely. Buzz Aldrin's personal experience of that time was going to sit with Jim Lovell's mother Blanche, as the events unfolded. Yes, it was an aborted lunar landing. But Buzz Aldrin calls it "a tremendous ending for a failed mission". And it has famously been made into a film.
Buzz Aldrin regards himself as enormously privileged to have had this experience. Yet it has almost wrecked his life. Immediately after the landing on the moon, the three astronauts were carted around, being displayed to cheering crowds of the public, on a seemingly relentless and endless world tour. Yet none of them were prepared or trained as diplomats or celebrities. They were dedicated Air Force officers, often good at working on their own, making quick decisions in stressful, sometimes intolerable situation. But this was a different sort of world.
As the years went on Buzz Aldrin's career plummeted. He was a public-relations tool for NASA, but ill-equipped for this in terms of his personality. He trained others, yet was unable to go on missions himself. He sometimes took jobs only remotely connected with his earlier experience, for instance selling cars for a living, because he had little money; astronauts were only paid according to their Air Force rank.
The reasons for this decline are further complicated. Buzz Aldrin began to struggle with clinical depression, which his mother had also suffered from. He reveals that his mother (whose maiden name, oddly, was "Moon") committed suicide, and he believes on reflection that it was mainly because she could not come to terms with the fact that her son had been to the moon, and the consequent exposure and fame.
The idea of an astronaut being somehow mentally or emotionally impaired was not an idea that would ever have been considered at the time. Bravely, Buzz Aldrin confirmed his clinical depression in public, thinking that by doing this he would be raising awareness for the problem, and support for its sufferers. However, he was then beset by another problem, the disease of alcoholism, which seemed to be a step too far for his family. His father was Air Force Colonel Edwin Eugene Aldrin Senior. (The author originally had the same name - "Buzz" was a nickname his family had given him in childhood. Later on he adopted it legally as his name.) Colonel Edwin Eugene Aldrin Senior rejected the whole notion of Buzz's alcoholism, apparently just wishing it would go away. He was enormously proud of his son's achievements in a military sense, however, even to having had a battle with the Post Office when the first commemorative stamps about the mission were issued. The caption was "First Man on the Moon", referring of course to Neil Armstrong. He wanted it to be altered to say, "First Men on the Moon"!
Buzz Aldrin himself bowed to pressure from family, friends and colleagues, and continued to deny his alcoholism until it nearly killed him. Making the fact known was heavily discouraged by NASA and largely hidden. Both conditions caused problems with his first two marriages, his career with the Air Force fell into ruins, and he found himself cancelling many talks and commitments either because he was in a drunken stupor, or immobile with depression. Buzz Aldrin says he owes his eventual recovery from these conditions to the continuing support from his second wife, Lois.
In recent years Buzz Aldrin has dedicated himself tirelessly to working towards future space exploration. He calls himself a "Space Evangelist", and the book is full of his plans,
"No other astronaut, active or inactive, was out in public trying to raise awareness about America's dying space program. We had the technology and the wherewithal to keep space exploration alive; the question was whether we have the will."
It is a long time since the American Government were willing to put any money into space exploration, and Buzz Aldrin feels this is very short-sighted. He talks about the Chinese, and their "taikonauts", feeling the irony of the giant steps China are now taking, while the USA seems unwilling to finance anything. Buzz Aldrin knows not only that the technology is there, but that more is ready to be developed, but the cash of course is not. Buzz Aldrin has invented a "Mars Cycler", which as its name suggests, is a kind of shuttle, using renewable rockets.
"One day my Mars Cycler will be put into practice; spaceports will be built along the way between Earth and Mars, and mankind will set up camp on Phobos, one of the moons of Mars, and then eventually on the red planet itself. Why? Because it is there, just waiting to be explored."
It is because "one-trip only" rockets have been used in the past, Buzz Aldrin believes, that the money has been (literally) burnt up, and also why space exploration gets such a bad press from environmentalists. He has started up his own company, the "Sharespace Lottery" believing that the money from this enterprising Space Tourism will fund future scientific endeavours.
"I believe that space travel will one day become as common as airline travel is today. I'm convinced, however, that the true future of space travel does not lie with government agencies - NASA is still obsessed with the idea that the primary purpose of the space program is science - but real progress will come from private companies competing to provide the ultimate adventure ride, and NASA will receive the trickle-down benefits."
Perhaps you know little about the Space Program other than the words,
"The Eagle has landed!" or
"That's one small step for [a] man, one giant leap for mankind."
Or even, "Houston, we have a problem," from the fated "Apollo 13" mission.
Or perhaps you know the two iconic photographs. One shows a footprint on the surface of the moon. Buzz Aldrin took this photograph spontaneously, as he was very taken with the way the fine dust arced according to the movements he made. He knew that the footprint would stay exactly the same for time immemorial, as there is no wind on the moon, and preserved the image on film. Another famous image is the "Visor shot", taken by Neil Armstrong with a Hasselblad camera, held at waist height, neither astronaut having the manual dexterity to operate cameras or see through the viewfinder what they were photographing. It is amazing in retrospect that some images like this are so superb.
In this one, there is a solitary astronaut on the moon's surface; his visor glows gold. Looking closely the visor shows a reflection of the "Eagle" lunar module, with the landing pad, Buzz's own shadow with the halo effect, several experiments the two had set up, and also Neil Armstrong taking the picture. It could be said to bear comparison with some of the greatest paintings in the world, in which the artist includes himself in the final work.
If you would like to know a little more behind the scenes, and to know what are the prospects for future space travel, then this book would be a good read for you. It is also interesting as a biography, on a human level, to see what such an experience can have on one individual. All astronauts who have been to the moon have dealt with this incredible experience; none have found it easy. Alan Bean, for instance, works out his dreams in almost mystical paintings. Buzz himself has said,
"I did not want "A giant leap for mankind" to be nothing more than a phrase from the past." And,
"I still get frustrated at times because I am a visionary often stymied by a bureaucratic maze."
He shares with his readers his vision of,
"A clean, green non-polluted Earth drawing on abundant space-tapped energy from our Sun, passenger travel to and from space for commercial and adventure activity, the step-by-step advance to Mars, even low-cost cycling missions to and from that planet and then beyond. All these goals are worth pursuing and well within our grasp."
So is it, after all, destined to be just a dream?
Now answer this question, "Who was the first person to land on the moon?" OK - Everybody knows it was Neil Armstrong. They might even know the date, 20th July 1969, and the name of the mission "Apollo 11". But only people who remember watching it on TV, and getting caught up in all the excitement, may remember who was the second man on the moon. For people of a certain age, it is akin to knowing what you were doing when President Kennedy got shot. Yet the "runner-up", who stepped on the moon's surface a mere 20 minutes after Neil Armstrong, was the next out of the module and down the ladder not because he was not the senior officer, but by a mere fluke. For technical reasons, he happened to be sitting further away in the spacecraft. He is rarely mentioned in the history books, yet this event has overshadowed his entire life. His name is Buzz Aldrin.
Magnificent Desolation: The Long Journey Home from the Moon is the second of two autobiographies written by Buzz Aldrin, the first being, "Return to Earth". Magnificent Desolation was transcribed by Ken Abraham, and published in June 2009. The words, "Beautiful, beautiful, magnificent desolation" were the first words spoken by Buzz Aldrin when he stepped onto the moon.
The book is partly a description of the technical aspects of the landing, and partly an overview of space travel not only before and since, but also its future prospects. Also, a large part of the book is a history of the fallout and repercussions of the mission for Buzz Aldrin on a personal level. It is a raw and frank account, with perhaps not as much bitterness as the reader might expect.
Many people were involved in the historic flight. John F. Kennedy had promised the American people, on 25th May 1961, that by the end of the decade they would have landed on the moon. Perhaps this was a rash promise. But it came about because of the political climate at the time - the competition with Russia - and was very much in tune with the burgeoning optimism at the beginning of the sixties, that anything was possible. And it became up to NASA to make it so.
"The National Aeronautics and Space Administration", or NASA, had been established in 1958 as a direct response to the Soviet launch of the world's first artificial satellite, "Sputnik 1" on October 4, 1957. On 12th April 1961, the newspapers world-wide were full of stories about the Russian cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin, who had orbited Earth. Not to be outdone amid throes of the Cold War, a USA astronaut made a sub-orbital ride 62 miles up to the edge of space on the 5th May. A mere 3 weeks later Kennedy made his momentous promise to the nation.
Mission followed mission, all carefully documented in this book. Usually a team of three would be chosen, the astronauts themselves being given little choice in the matter. It was not at that time a career choice to be an astronaut. Astronauts were cherry-picked from the Air Force, and given special training. Again, it was mere chance that Buzz Aldrin's name came up for this flight out of the super-fit, intelligent and trained officers who had been chosen for the scheme. Equally, it was chance that put astronaut Michael Collins a short distance away from the moon's surface, piloting the command spacecraft of "Apollo 11", "Columbia", after the undocking and separation of the lunar module, "Eagle", for the entire time. This third member of the team did not enter the "Eagle" or step onto the moon at all in this mission. And no, unsurprisingly, he doesn't always make it into the history books either.
Despite the historical content, Magnificent Desolation starts, as all good stories do, with an exciting event before subsequently backtracking. So it starts with a description of the landing itself, which dramatically came within seconds of failure. Buzz Aldrin says that when he and Neil Armstrong were ready in "Eagle", he noticed a pungent metallic smell,
"There in the dust on the floor on the right side of the cabin, lay a circuit breaker switch that had broken off... the broken switch had snapped off from the engine-arm circuit breaker - the vital breaker needed to send electrical power to the ascent engine that would lift Neil and me off the moon."
He deduced that one of the two astronauts must have bumped it accidentally with their cumbersome backpacks. It would have to be pushed back in again for the ascent engine to ignite, to get the astronauts back home. At this point in the text it becomes clear how much of a team effort this all was. He reported it to mission control, debating with Houston how to work around the circuit, in case it had to be left open. He knew that one key computer expert would either manage to calculate how to solve the problem, without using the circuit breaker, or else the whole mission would be aborted (and of course they would die.) His training clicked in. He left it with NASA and went to sleep.
Overnight he came up with a possible solution, wacky though it seemed; a humble felt-tipped pen! He inserted it into the small opening where the circuit breaker switch should have been pushed in,
"Sure enough the circuit breaker held. We were going to get off the moon after all. To this day I still have the broken circuit breaker switch and the felt-tipped pen I used to ignite our engines."
Not all of the space missions, by any means, were covered in glory. Buzz Aldrin reminds us that much later, on 1st February 2003, the "Columbia" space shuttle disintegrated shortly after its launch. All 7 aboard died. The three further shuttles which had been planned were immediately cancelled, and the decision was made that manned space missions would be phased out by 2010. What catastrophe had there been, which would result in such a tragedy? A tiny part of the insulating layer had broken off. This small piece would have weighed approximately one pound, yet it had disastrous ramifications. And it further demonstrated to both the author and the reader how trivial episodes could influence the success or failure of a mission.
An earlier disaster occurred on 11th April 1970, on "Apollo 13" - the 7th manned space flight, but only the second mission after the first moon landing. It is now classed by NASA as a "successful failure". Buzz Aldrin is adamant that NASA's first priority is always the safety of the astronauts. He was always certain that their lives would be uppermost and come first, irrespective of the potential lost opportunities for gaining knowledge, the financial implications etcetera. The example he cites is "Apollo 13", manned by Jim Lovell, John Swigert and Fred Haise. An oxygen tank exploded - then a second one also exploded. The electricity, heating, lights and water all went out as a consequence. Yet the astronauts themselves came home safely. Buzz Aldrin's personal experience of that time was going to sit with Jim Lovell's mother Blanche, as the events unfolded. Yes, it was an aborted lunar landing. But Buzz Aldrin calls it "a tremendous ending for a failed mission". And it has famously been made into a film.
Buzz Aldrin regards himself as enormously privileged to have had this experience. Yet it has almost wrecked his life. Immediately after the landing on the moon, the three astronauts were carted around, being displayed to cheering crowds of the public, on a seemingly relentless and endless world tour. Yet none of them were prepared or trained as diplomats or celebrities. They were dedicated Air Force officers, often good at working on their own, making quick decisions in stressful, sometimes intolerable situation. But this was a different sort of world.
As the years went on Buzz Aldrin's career plummeted. He was a public-relations tool for NASA, but ill-equipped for this in terms of his personality. He trained others, yet was unable to go on missions himself. He sometimes took jobs only remotely connected with his earlier experience, for instance selling cars for a living, because he had little money; astronauts were only paid according to their Air Force rank.
The reasons for this decline are further complicated. Buzz Aldrin began to struggle with clinical depression, which his mother had also suffered from. He reveals that his mother (whose maiden name, oddly, was "Moon") committed suicide, and he believes on reflection that it was mainly because she could not come to terms with the fact that her son had been to the moon, and the consequent exposure and fame.
The idea of an astronaut being somehow mentally or emotionally impaired was not an idea that would ever have been considered at the time. Bravely, Buzz Aldrin confirmed his clinical depression in public, thinking that by doing this he would be raising awareness for the problem, and support for its sufferers. However, he was then beset by another problem, the disease of alcoholism, which seemed to be a step too far for his family. His father was Air Force Colonel Edwin Eugene Aldrin Senior. (The author originally had the same name - "Buzz" was a nickname his family had given him in childhood. Later on he adopted it legally as his name.) Colonel Edwin Eugene Aldrin Senior rejected the whole notion of Buzz's alcoholism, apparently just wishing it would go away. He was enormously proud of his son's achievements in a military sense, however, even to having had a battle with the Post Office when the first commemorative stamps about the mission were issued. The caption was "First Man on the Moon", referring of course to Neil Armstrong. He wanted it to be altered to say, "First Men on the Moon"!
Buzz Aldrin himself bowed to pressure from family, friends and colleagues, and continued to deny his alcoholism until it nearly killed him. Making the fact known was heavily discouraged by NASA and largely hidden. Both conditions caused problems with his first two marriages, his career with the Air Force fell into ruins, and he found himself cancelling many talks and commitments either because he was in a drunken stupor, or immobile with depression. Buzz Aldrin says he owes his eventual recovery from these conditions to the continuing support from his second wife, Lois.
In recent years Buzz Aldrin has dedicated himself tirelessly to working towards future space exploration. He calls himself a "Space Evangelist", and the book is full of his plans,
"No other astronaut, active or inactive, was out in public trying to raise awareness about America's dying space program. We had the technology and the wherewithal to keep space exploration alive; the question was whether we have the will."
It is a long time since the American Government were willing to put any money into space exploration, and Buzz Aldrin feels this is very short-sighted. He talks about the Chinese, and their "taikonauts", feeling the irony of the giant steps China are now taking, while the USA seems unwilling to finance anything. Buzz Aldrin knows not only that the technology is there, but that more is ready to be developed, but the cash of course is not. Buzz Aldrin has invented a "Mars Cycler", which as its name suggests, is a kind of shuttle, using renewable rockets.
"One day my Mars Cycler will be put into practice; spaceports will be built along the way between Earth and Mars, and mankind will set up camp on Phobos, one of the moons of Mars, and then eventually on the red planet itself. Why? Because it is there, just waiting to be explored."
It is because "one-trip only" rockets have been used in the past, Buzz Aldrin believes, that the money has been (literally) burnt up, and also why space exploration gets such a bad press from environmentalists. He has started up his own company, the "Sharespace Lottery" believing that the money from this enterprising Space Tourism will fund future scientific endeavours.
"I believe that space travel will one day become as common as airline travel is today. I'm convinced, however, that the true future of space travel does not lie with government agencies - NASA is still obsessed with the idea that the primary purpose of the space program is science - but real progress will come from private companies competing to provide the ultimate adventure ride, and NASA will receive the trickle-down benefits."
Perhaps you know little about the Space Program other than the words,
"The Eagle has landed!" or
"That's one small step for [a] man, one giant leap for mankind."
Or even, "Houston, we have a problem," from the fated "Apollo 13" mission.
Or perhaps you know the two iconic photographs. One shows a footprint on the surface of the moon. Buzz Aldrin took this photograph spontaneously, as he was very taken with the way the fine dust arced according to the movements he made. He knew that the footprint would stay exactly the same for time immemorial, as there is no wind on the moon, and preserved the image on film. Another famous image is the "Visor shot", taken by Neil Armstrong with a Hasselblad camera, held at waist height, neither astronaut having the manual dexterity to operate cameras or see through the viewfinder what they were photographing. It is amazing in retrospect that some images like this are so superb.
In this one, there is a solitary astronaut on the moon's surface; his visor glows gold. Looking closely the visor shows a reflection of the "Eagle" lunar module, with the landing pad, Buzz's own shadow with the halo effect, several experiments the two had set up, and also Neil Armstrong taking the picture. It could be said to bear comparison with some of the greatest paintings in the world, in which the artist includes himself in the final work.
If you would like to know a little more behind the scenes, and to know what are the prospects for future space travel, then this book would be a good read for you. It is also interesting as a biography, on a human level, to see what such an experience can have on one individual. All astronauts who have been to the moon have dealt with this incredible experience; none have found it easy. Alan Bean, for instance, works out his dreams in almost mystical paintings. Buzz himself has said,
"I did not want "A giant leap for mankind" to be nothing more than a phrase from the past." And,
"I still get frustrated at times because I am a visionary often stymied by a bureaucratic maze."
He shares with his readers his vision of,
"A clean, green non-polluted Earth drawing on abundant space-tapped energy from our Sun, passenger travel to and from space for commercial and adventure activity, the step-by-step advance to Mars, even low-cost cycling missions to and from that planet and then beyond. All these goals are worth pursuing and well within our grasp."
So is it, after all, destined to be just a dream?
December 31, 2009
I'm a big fan of Buzz Aldrin and the space program in general, but I was disappointed by this book. The first part about the moon landing was interesting, and there were some interesting tidbits about how he felt during the whole thing.
The second part about his struggles back on Earth, and the end of his first marriage, are also interesting, although somewhat flat. That period of his life had to be deeply emotional for him, yet he relays the story as if he was reading the weather report. Mr. Aldrin is clearly an emotionally reserved man, which makes the fact that he even attempted this book something of an accomplishment. The story is interesting as far as it goes, but lacks any real depth.
The third part of the book, about his current wife Lois and his current jet-setting lifestyle, is the most disappointing. Buzz spends pages at a time essentially telling us about all of the celebrities he is close personal friends with, and how wonderful Lois is. However, he continues to break the cardinal rule of storytelling, in that he constantly tells us without really showing us. He keeps saying Lois is great, but never really gives us any real window into their lives together except to describe her apparent role as his business manager. His laundry list of celebrity acquaintances quickly becomes tedious, and comes across as bragging more than anything else. Buzz is an American hero in his own right, and it's puzzling why he feels the need to name drop to such a degree.
I think no less of Mr. Aldrin for attempting this book, but in the final analysis, it's so much less than it could have been.
The second part about his struggles back on Earth, and the end of his first marriage, are also interesting, although somewhat flat. That period of his life had to be deeply emotional for him, yet he relays the story as if he was reading the weather report. Mr. Aldrin is clearly an emotionally reserved man, which makes the fact that he even attempted this book something of an accomplishment. The story is interesting as far as it goes, but lacks any real depth.
The third part of the book, about his current wife Lois and his current jet-setting lifestyle, is the most disappointing. Buzz spends pages at a time essentially telling us about all of the celebrities he is close personal friends with, and how wonderful Lois is. However, he continues to break the cardinal rule of storytelling, in that he constantly tells us without really showing us. He keeps saying Lois is great, but never really gives us any real window into their lives together except to describe her apparent role as his business manager. His laundry list of celebrity acquaintances quickly becomes tedious, and comes across as bragging more than anything else. Buzz is an American hero in his own right, and it's puzzling why he feels the need to name drop to such a degree.
I think no less of Mr. Aldrin for attempting this book, but in the final analysis, it's so much less than it could have been.
August 10, 2018
I learned a lot from reading this and realized just how little I know about space and space exploration. I have added quite a few related books to my to-read list thanks to this book.
Buzz Aldrin's life is clearly a fascinating one, and I enjoyed reading about it. I haven't read his first autobiography but I don't think that hindered my experience with this one. He was very frank about his alcoholism and depression, which was refreshing. The photos included were excellent as well. A worthwhile read.
Buzz Aldrin's life is clearly a fascinating one, and I enjoyed reading about it. I haven't read his first autobiography but I don't think that hindered my experience with this one. He was very frank about his alcoholism and depression, which was refreshing. The photos included were excellent as well. A worthwhile read.
February 8, 2019
"....after years and years of being asked to speak to a group of people and then be introduced as the second man on the Moon, it does get a little frustrating. Is it really necessary to point out to the crowd that somebody else was first when we all went through the same training, we all landed at the same time and all contributed? But for the rest of my life I’ll always be identified as the second man to walk on the Moon."
--Buzz Aldrin--
Have you ever started reading a book, and at least in the beginning you're thinking to yourself "I'm going enjoy this", only to get well into the book before realizing you really can't wait to be done with it? For me, Magnificent Desolation was such a book. Of course, by this time you're feeling pretty invested in reading it, having slogged through maybe one-third of this boring work, and not wanting to simply stop reading -- who knows, maybe it will get better? -- then as you approach the ending you're kinda ticked off that it doesn't.
Buzz Aldrin's book starts by telling all about the Apollo 11 mission, landing on the moon, and returning to earth. This, I quite enjoyed. Ok, there was the occasional caustic remark from Buzz over some slight he took offense to. Criticizing Neil Armstrong for reporting to Houston that the "Eagle has landed", when in Buzz's opinion Neil was wasting valuable time (because it must have taken, what, 3-4 seconds?). Later there was his criticism of the Postal Service for making a stamp which said "First MAN on the moon" when of course it should have said "First MEN on the moon".
But after discussing the moon voyage, Buzz sets sail on what I'd best describe as a rather defensive essay on his post-lunar life. True, he notes his struggles with alcohol, depression and failed marriages. But it struck me that the book was intended to get it on the record that he is a hero (deservedly so) despite his problems. For example he spends time defending why he went around "lobbying" to Deke Slayton and others that he, not Neil, should be first to step on the moon. He blames these actions on competitiveness, not jealousy. Then Buzz derides Frank Borman, on Jim Lovell's team, for mentioning in a book that he (Frank) had been given the opportunity to fly the Apollo 11 mission but had opted to wait for another flight, presumably because later flights entailed more scientific studies. Buzz mentions several times that he and Frank had a competitive relationship.
The latter half of the book is largely directed toward Buzz's many awards and accolades, talking about famous people he knows (like when he was taking his wife on a vacation to Spain and called up the King & Queen to get together), his graduating #1 at West Point, getting a doctorate at MIT (where he designed many of the concepts later used by NASA), shooting down MIGs in Korea, talking to his friend James Cameron (producer of Titanic) and Richard Branson (owner of Virgin) about arranging a consumer space flight service, criticizing NASA for using solid fuel rockets on Challenger when he (Buzz) had warned against it, criticizing NASA in a congressional hearing for not pushing for space flight missions for the general public (and for not employing Buzz's patented Space Share lottery system), suing Omega (watches) and Bicardi (rum) for using a picture of Buzz on the moon (even though you couldn't tell who it was behind the visor), and criticizing Disney for using the name "Buzz" in the movie Toy Story.
--Buzz Aldrin--
Have you ever started reading a book, and at least in the beginning you're thinking to yourself "I'm going enjoy this", only to get well into the book before realizing you really can't wait to be done with it? For me, Magnificent Desolation was such a book. Of course, by this time you're feeling pretty invested in reading it, having slogged through maybe one-third of this boring work, and not wanting to simply stop reading -- who knows, maybe it will get better? -- then as you approach the ending you're kinda ticked off that it doesn't.
Buzz Aldrin's book starts by telling all about the Apollo 11 mission, landing on the moon, and returning to earth. This, I quite enjoyed. Ok, there was the occasional caustic remark from Buzz over some slight he took offense to. Criticizing Neil Armstrong for reporting to Houston that the "Eagle has landed", when in Buzz's opinion Neil was wasting valuable time (because it must have taken, what, 3-4 seconds?). Later there was his criticism of the Postal Service for making a stamp which said "First MAN on the moon" when of course it should have said "First MEN on the moon".
But after discussing the moon voyage, Buzz sets sail on what I'd best describe as a rather defensive essay on his post-lunar life. True, he notes his struggles with alcohol, depression and failed marriages. But it struck me that the book was intended to get it on the record that he is a hero (deservedly so) despite his problems. For example he spends time defending why he went around "lobbying" to Deke Slayton and others that he, not Neil, should be first to step on the moon. He blames these actions on competitiveness, not jealousy. Then Buzz derides Frank Borman, on Jim Lovell's team, for mentioning in a book that he (Frank) had been given the opportunity to fly the Apollo 11 mission but had opted to wait for another flight, presumably because later flights entailed more scientific studies. Buzz mentions several times that he and Frank had a competitive relationship.
The latter half of the book is largely directed toward Buzz's many awards and accolades, talking about famous people he knows (like when he was taking his wife on a vacation to Spain and called up the King & Queen to get together), his graduating #1 at West Point, getting a doctorate at MIT (where he designed many of the concepts later used by NASA), shooting down MIGs in Korea, talking to his friend James Cameron (producer of Titanic) and Richard Branson (owner of Virgin) about arranging a consumer space flight service, criticizing NASA for using solid fuel rockets on Challenger when he (Buzz) had warned against it, criticizing NASA in a congressional hearing for not pushing for space flight missions for the general public (and for not employing Buzz's patented Space Share lottery system), suing Omega (watches) and Bicardi (rum) for using a picture of Buzz on the moon (even though you couldn't tell who it was behind the visor), and criticizing Disney for using the name "Buzz" in the movie Toy Story.
July 15, 2018
I really WANTED to like this book, but alas.
First, kudos to Mr. Aldrin for being forthcoming with his struggles with recurrent depression and with alcoholism. My only dismay with this is in the last third of the book when he implies that to overcome depression one can stop medication as long as one has a dedicated upbeat person to help them. He proves how not true this is when shortly afterwards he describes a several week period where he didn't get out of bed because of one of his "blue funks" and continued to tell about his "episodes." For someone who fancied himself an advocate for the mentally ill (which he said he was not, even though depression is a mental illness) this is a very dangerous thing to put in the book.
The first part of the book is very interesting as he describes a first hand experience on Apollo 11. The next part is also interesting. It is difficult to listen to how he self destructs because of depression and alcoholism and takes down the lives of those around him in the process. He really does not express much remorse, except to say that his first wife was a "good woman" and he "felt bad." He recounts his womanizing (but denies he was a philanderer) with very little indication that he was sorry for the pain he caused. However, this book is all about Buzz, and Buzz is all about Buzz as you listen to this story unfold.
From there the book takes a nose dive and becomes the story of a very self absorbed man, one ultra concerned about being important. It seems this attitude may be the very essence of his problems and the book has the feel of someone desperately trying to convince themselves of their own greatness. He keeps saying certain things "don't matter" (such as being SECOND to set foot on the moon) but then does an excellent job of convincing the reader that it actually really DID matter to him. If he had simply said that Armstrong's job on the LM was on the left and the door was on the left.. he could have left it there, but he goes into excruciating detail on how he spent weeks talking to a psychiatrist about it and how he discussed it prior to the launch with his astronaut buddies. This is very accomplished and bright man - a graduate of West Point, a fighter pilot who saw action in Korea, and a PhD from MIT. After being on the first mission to the moon - in his own mind he could never do anything that mattered after that. DECADES later he had "Fly me to the Moon" played at this third wedding. He let his entire life be defined by a few years of his career with NASA.
Even though it is not the most appropriate analogy to make given Mr. Aldrin's decades of sobriety, I could not help but think that college students could get into real trouble with a drinking game that had them drink every time Aldrin referred to himself as a "hero" or noted someone else referring to him as a "hero." I think perhaps he confused the meaning of "hero" and "celebrity." He resented anyone cashing in on his celebrity, but had no problem doing it himself. The last third of the book is just nauseating as he recounts the jet set life he and his wife live, and he shamelessly name drops every celebrity you can think of - including a very eye-rolling account of calling up the King of Spain. He "sadly" tells of how his wife lost her family fortune and how they were unsure how they would continue the life they had become used to (at this point listening to the audio CD, I am literally yelling "BARF!" at the CD player) and then proceeds to continue telling of all the fabulous trips he takes - diving to the Titanic, going to the North Pole, racing in celebrity car races and being given legions of awards. The reader/listener gets to hear quotes of the transcripts of the speeches lauding Buzz. It was pretty stomach churning.
It is really a shame, because at the end, he really did seem to care about educating the next generation about space exploration, and used his engineering knowledge to try to come up with ideas for future travel (but clearly got his nose out of joint when his ideas weren't loved and enacted.)
I understand in recent months he is reported to be suffering from dementia and his children are trying to help him, but he is suing them (In the news, not the book). As someone whose mother is suffering from a type of dementia, I feel for his children and hope that whatever happens it is in Aldrin's best interest. It actually makes me wonder if perhaps the early stages of dementia had already taken hold when this book was written. It would also explain the rambling interview included at the end of audiobook.
The book made me sad. I wish I had not read it, or at least quit when I wanted to stop. I "liked" Buzz Aldrin before I read the book and I admired the gutsy astronaut who beat alcoholism and managed depression, and dedicated his later years to space education. I don't like him any more after reading this book. He doesn't come across as a very nice guy. I think I am going to chose to believe the dementia had a part in it and give the guy a break.
Bottom line. If you are curious, get the book from the library. Don't buy it.
First, kudos to Mr. Aldrin for being forthcoming with his struggles with recurrent depression and with alcoholism. My only dismay with this is in the last third of the book when he implies that to overcome depression one can stop medication as long as one has a dedicated upbeat person to help them. He proves how not true this is when shortly afterwards he describes a several week period where he didn't get out of bed because of one of his "blue funks" and continued to tell about his "episodes." For someone who fancied himself an advocate for the mentally ill (which he said he was not, even though depression is a mental illness) this is a very dangerous thing to put in the book.
The first part of the book is very interesting as he describes a first hand experience on Apollo 11. The next part is also interesting. It is difficult to listen to how he self destructs because of depression and alcoholism and takes down the lives of those around him in the process. He really does not express much remorse, except to say that his first wife was a "good woman" and he "felt bad." He recounts his womanizing (but denies he was a philanderer) with very little indication that he was sorry for the pain he caused. However, this book is all about Buzz, and Buzz is all about Buzz as you listen to this story unfold.
From there the book takes a nose dive and becomes the story of a very self absorbed man, one ultra concerned about being important. It seems this attitude may be the very essence of his problems and the book has the feel of someone desperately trying to convince themselves of their own greatness. He keeps saying certain things "don't matter" (such as being SECOND to set foot on the moon) but then does an excellent job of convincing the reader that it actually really DID matter to him. If he had simply said that Armstrong's job on the LM was on the left and the door was on the left.. he could have left it there, but he goes into excruciating detail on how he spent weeks talking to a psychiatrist about it and how he discussed it prior to the launch with his astronaut buddies. This is very accomplished and bright man - a graduate of West Point, a fighter pilot who saw action in Korea, and a PhD from MIT. After being on the first mission to the moon - in his own mind he could never do anything that mattered after that. DECADES later he had "Fly me to the Moon" played at this third wedding. He let his entire life be defined by a few years of his career with NASA.
Even though it is not the most appropriate analogy to make given Mr. Aldrin's decades of sobriety, I could not help but think that college students could get into real trouble with a drinking game that had them drink every time Aldrin referred to himself as a "hero" or noted someone else referring to him as a "hero." I think perhaps he confused the meaning of "hero" and "celebrity." He resented anyone cashing in on his celebrity, but had no problem doing it himself. The last third of the book is just nauseating as he recounts the jet set life he and his wife live, and he shamelessly name drops every celebrity you can think of - including a very eye-rolling account of calling up the King of Spain. He "sadly" tells of how his wife lost her family fortune and how they were unsure how they would continue the life they had become used to (at this point listening to the audio CD, I am literally yelling "BARF!" at the CD player) and then proceeds to continue telling of all the fabulous trips he takes - diving to the Titanic, going to the North Pole, racing in celebrity car races and being given legions of awards. The reader/listener gets to hear quotes of the transcripts of the speeches lauding Buzz. It was pretty stomach churning.
It is really a shame, because at the end, he really did seem to care about educating the next generation about space exploration, and used his engineering knowledge to try to come up with ideas for future travel (but clearly got his nose out of joint when his ideas weren't loved and enacted.)
I understand in recent months he is reported to be suffering from dementia and his children are trying to help him, but he is suing them (In the news, not the book). As someone whose mother is suffering from a type of dementia, I feel for his children and hope that whatever happens it is in Aldrin's best interest. It actually makes me wonder if perhaps the early stages of dementia had already taken hold when this book was written. It would also explain the rambling interview included at the end of audiobook.
The book made me sad. I wish I had not read it, or at least quit when I wanted to stop. I "liked" Buzz Aldrin before I read the book and I admired the gutsy astronaut who beat alcoholism and managed depression, and dedicated his later years to space education. I don't like him any more after reading this book. He doesn't come across as a very nice guy. I think I am going to chose to believe the dementia had a part in it and give the guy a break.
Bottom line. If you are curious, get the book from the library. Don't buy it.
July 7, 2009
I listened to the audiobook but I didn't realize when I bought it that it was so new, until I saw Buzz on the TV. Actually, I must have downloaded it on the first day of the release.
It's an interesting story as it shows the depths to which Buzz sank before he dealt with his alcoholism after being catapulted to fame in the NASA astronaut program. It is also a testament to marriage and partnership and how both partners worked to overcome their problems and changed their lives for the better.
About a quarter of the book is devoted to Buzz's NASA days, the most of the rest to his post NASA struggle with depression and alcoholism.
I enjoyed the book, but it clearly shows that it has been cobbled together very quickly, possibly for the 40th anniversary. I had the feeling that I had heard some of the facts mentioned several times. Maybe this was more noticeable by hearing the audiobook, a text reader might not notice it so much but when I later watched Buzz give interviews, I got the same feeling, he speaks in a similar way retelling his familiar life story once more.
For NASA/Apollo geeks, possibly the most interesting part will be hearing Buzz's dreams for the future. He still believes in manned space exploration and is still thinking up new ideas to overcome the problems which he has first hand experience of. His ceaseless work in promoting manned space exploration may actually be a greater legacy than his historical visit moon as one of the first two men to land on the moon.
It's an interesting story as it shows the depths to which Buzz sank before he dealt with his alcoholism after being catapulted to fame in the NASA astronaut program. It is also a testament to marriage and partnership and how both partners worked to overcome their problems and changed their lives for the better.
About a quarter of the book is devoted to Buzz's NASA days, the most of the rest to his post NASA struggle with depression and alcoholism.
I enjoyed the book, but it clearly shows that it has been cobbled together very quickly, possibly for the 40th anniversary. I had the feeling that I had heard some of the facts mentioned several times. Maybe this was more noticeable by hearing the audiobook, a text reader might not notice it so much but when I later watched Buzz give interviews, I got the same feeling, he speaks in a similar way retelling his familiar life story once more.
For NASA/Apollo geeks, possibly the most interesting part will be hearing Buzz's dreams for the future. He still believes in manned space exploration and is still thinking up new ideas to overcome the problems which he has first hand experience of. His ceaseless work in promoting manned space exploration may actually be a greater legacy than his historical visit moon as one of the first two men to land on the moon.
July 15, 2012
It took courage to write this book.
After returning from the moon, Buzz Aldrin spiraled into depression and alcoholism. Having bouts of depression myself, it is not an easy thing to confess to. Too many people do not understand depression, and telling someone to "cheer up! " doesn't cut it.
Further, despite great strides, there is still a considerable stigma associated with depression and even more stigma attached to addiction disease. It took courage for someone very much in the public eye to admit this.
A wonderful, honest, gut wrenching memoir peppered throughout with Space anecdotes and plaintive advocacy for civilian space travel.
After returning from the moon, Buzz Aldrin spiraled into depression and alcoholism. Having bouts of depression myself, it is not an easy thing to confess to. Too many people do not understand depression, and telling someone to "cheer up! " doesn't cut it.
Further, despite great strides, there is still a considerable stigma associated with depression and even more stigma attached to addiction disease. It took courage for someone very much in the public eye to admit this.
A wonderful, honest, gut wrenching memoir peppered throughout with Space anecdotes and plaintive advocacy for civilian space travel.
November 13, 2020
Published forty years after Apollo 11 made history, this is Buzz Aldrin's second memoir, dealing primarily with his life after he became forever known as the second man on the moon. If you pick this up because you want to know about all things space-related, you'll likely be somewhat disappointed. While the book opens with an account of the moon landing, most of it concerns what came after for Aldrin - and a lot of that is not pretty. With the benefit of decades of hindsight, he frankly discusses his struggles with depression, alcoholism, and the many ways his life fell apart after his return from that once-in-a-lifetime mission. However, after hitting rock bottom, he slowly but surely managed to pick himself back up, put his life back together in a new way, and go on to become one of the very few of the Apollo astronauts still actively and tirelessly advocating for mankind's return to space.
May 13, 2022
Audio Book & eBook
July 5, 2009
Buzz Aldrin is perhaps the most colorful astronaut in history (thus far). And this memoir shows off Buzz in all his quirkiness. As the book depicts, within three years of returning from the moon, Buzz was already far-removed from the proverbial no nonsense, cool-headed image of an astronaut.
Don't expect a detailed, epic recounting of the Apollo 11 flight. Buzz and his collaborator Ken Abraham dispense with the legendary mission in the first three chapters. This is a book about Buzz's life post-Apollo. It is an unabashedly humanizing account of failed marriage, alcoholism and depression. It is also an inspiring depiction of Buzz's eventual triumph over his demons.
Along the way, Buzz engages in a great deal of reflection and discussion about the rationale for space exploration. He makes his case for the commercialization of space travel. For the space enthusiast, these may be the most interesting chapters.
Buzz also fills a lot of pages recounting his celebrity exploits among the rich and famous of Hollywood and the world stage. At times the memoir verges on self-agrandizement. Still, the book ultimately left me regarding Buzz as a great American, a brave explorer, and a staunch advocate of expanding space travel.
Don't expect a detailed, epic recounting of the Apollo 11 flight. Buzz and his collaborator Ken Abraham dispense with the legendary mission in the first three chapters. This is a book about Buzz's life post-Apollo. It is an unabashedly humanizing account of failed marriage, alcoholism and depression. It is also an inspiring depiction of Buzz's eventual triumph over his demons.
Along the way, Buzz engages in a great deal of reflection and discussion about the rationale for space exploration. He makes his case for the commercialization of space travel. For the space enthusiast, these may be the most interesting chapters.
Buzz also fills a lot of pages recounting his celebrity exploits among the rich and famous of Hollywood and the world stage. At times the memoir verges on self-agrandizement. Still, the book ultimately left me regarding Buzz as a great American, a brave explorer, and a staunch advocate of expanding space travel.
February 24, 2010
I have been waiting for this book since last July as we celebrated the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11 mission to the moon. I expected to read more about the actual flight and time ON the moon, but discovered that it was a book primarily about Buzz Aldrin's life after Apollo 11 returned home. I should have figured that out since the title says "The long journey home from the moon", but silly me I thought it was about coming home literally from the moon.
While perhaps interesting to some, it was not what I wanted to read, and so I was disappointed. If I had been more interested in Aldrin's later life, I might have rated this book higher. As it is, I really didn't want to read about his alcoholism and recovery, or the struggles he had in his career when NASA put the astronauts on a "world tour" after the moon landing that stifled his military career.
While perhaps interesting to some, it was not what I wanted to read, and so I was disappointed. If I had been more interested in Aldrin's later life, I might have rated this book higher. As it is, I really didn't want to read about his alcoholism and recovery, or the struggles he had in his career when NASA put the astronauts on a "world tour" after the moon landing that stifled his military career.
February 2, 2022
I don’t think I’m blabbing out any state secrets when I say that Buzz Aldrin is a real life hero, both in the USA and in the wider world.
Whilst this really interesting book obviously deals with the events of 1969, it is even more interesting to see how it shaped the rest of his life.
He is very open about his alcoholism and depression and little wonder he suffered with both of these illnesses. When you are one of the first people in the history of your species to travel to and step on another celestial body, what comes next? What could possibly pique your interest?
Mr Aldrin answers these questions in an honest and frank account of his life since 1969. A really interesting and enjoyable read.
Whilst this really interesting book obviously deals with the events of 1969, it is even more interesting to see how it shaped the rest of his life.
He is very open about his alcoholism and depression and little wonder he suffered with both of these illnesses. When you are one of the first people in the history of your species to travel to and step on another celestial body, what comes next? What could possibly pique your interest?
Mr Aldrin answers these questions in an honest and frank account of his life since 1969. A really interesting and enjoyable read.
December 27, 2018
This book was not what I expected. I had expected nearly the entire thing to be about the moon landing and that was actually just a small portion of this total book (Maybe 1/4). I did not walk away feeling let down by the book, even if it was not what I expected.
After the first portion, which was about the lunar landing, we got into the life of Buzz Aldrin after he had come back. The man had come back a hero to the American people and also to many people outside of the country. This put a huge amount of pressure on him and the other astronauts. They were paraded around and shown off constantly and I can not see how that would end any other way than to over-inflate an ego or to burn someone out. In this section, Buzz Aldrin tells a story that many people would rather leave buried, a story about depression and alcoholism. His desire to make his problems known, with the hope of helping or giving others courage to seek help is a noble and selfless act. He paid for this decision in more ways than one but it also may have helped to set him on the right track. This is a Buzz Aldrin we never learned about in school.
Sadly, a common theme among "American hero" books that I have recently read is that being a hero is just a temporary thing. When someone comes back a hero, they are marched around and flaunted until they are no longer useful for the political agenda and then they are swept under the rug or discarded. Thanks for your service but now you are a problem. Buzz had a lot of friends who personally vouched for him and tried to help him while he was caught up in these crippling illnesses. He rarely had to go it alone but the government certainly had no inclination to offer official help. Buzz continued to work and offer his advice and ideas but once the hero shine had worn off, he was quickly brushed off and impeded with bureaucratic red tape. It was really disheartening to know that something, that at one point had captivated the world, was now easily dismissed by politicians who can only care for dollar signs and the size of their own pocketbooks. For what it is worth, I am really glad that Mr.Aldrin continued his pursuit of his passion and never gave up on sharing his dream.
The last part of the book was less than thrilling. It was mostly about his more recent life with his wife and how she became his business manager in "The business of Buzz". She seemed like a wonderful woman who knew just where and when to push him to prevent him from falling back into depression. Some of the parts seemed a little bit like bragging about his celebrity friends and social standing but I also think he earned a little bit of bragging rights.
Overall, this was a pretty enjoyable read. It is tough to imagine how someone could rise so high (pun unintended but let's run with it) and then, in such a short time, could fall so low. The honesty that was put into this book and that he did not hide his flaws was yet another badge of bravery that I can now attribute to someone who was already a legend.
After the first portion, which was about the lunar landing, we got into the life of Buzz Aldrin after he had come back. The man had come back a hero to the American people and also to many people outside of the country. This put a huge amount of pressure on him and the other astronauts. They were paraded around and shown off constantly and I can not see how that would end any other way than to over-inflate an ego or to burn someone out. In this section, Buzz Aldrin tells a story that many people would rather leave buried, a story about depression and alcoholism. His desire to make his problems known, with the hope of helping or giving others courage to seek help is a noble and selfless act. He paid for this decision in more ways than one but it also may have helped to set him on the right track. This is a Buzz Aldrin we never learned about in school.
Sadly, a common theme among "American hero" books that I have recently read is that being a hero is just a temporary thing. When someone comes back a hero, they are marched around and flaunted until they are no longer useful for the political agenda and then they are swept under the rug or discarded. Thanks for your service but now you are a problem. Buzz had a lot of friends who personally vouched for him and tried to help him while he was caught up in these crippling illnesses. He rarely had to go it alone but the government certainly had no inclination to offer official help. Buzz continued to work and offer his advice and ideas but once the hero shine had worn off, he was quickly brushed off and impeded with bureaucratic red tape. It was really disheartening to know that something, that at one point had captivated the world, was now easily dismissed by politicians who can only care for dollar signs and the size of their own pocketbooks. For what it is worth, I am really glad that Mr.Aldrin continued his pursuit of his passion and never gave up on sharing his dream.
The last part of the book was less than thrilling. It was mostly about his more recent life with his wife and how she became his business manager in "The business of Buzz". She seemed like a wonderful woman who knew just where and when to push him to prevent him from falling back into depression. Some of the parts seemed a little bit like bragging about his celebrity friends and social standing but I also think he earned a little bit of bragging rights.
Overall, this was a pretty enjoyable read. It is tough to imagine how someone could rise so high (pun unintended but let's run with it) and then, in such a short time, could fall so low. The honesty that was put into this book and that he did not hide his flaws was yet another badge of bravery that I can now attribute to someone who was already a legend.
October 1, 2021
“Take a good, long, honest positive look at what good can come out of every situation you’re in. Wherever you are, that’s where you are. You’re there with it. This is your history you’re living right now. So do what you can to make the most of what comes along. And please, don’t try to do everything on your own. There are a lot of people out there in the universe who wish you well and want to be your friend. Let them help you. You don’t have to carry it on your own.” - Buzz Aldrin
For me, after reading this book, I saw that this idea of making the best of every situation you find yourself in, reaching out for help from good people and letting them help you with your burdens is the bedrock principle of the three phases of this book.
In the moon landing section of the book, for example, I read Aldrin’s accounts of near misses, potential perils, and awe-inspiring moments of triumph that the astronauts of Apollo experienced while on their iconic mission.
This phase of Aldrin’s story contained the most dramatic examples of the idea of, “making the best of every situation,” not to mention the almost “brothers in combat” kind of trust and interdependence that must have been forged between Armstrong, Aldrin, and Collins.
The second section of the book is the one in which Aldrin talks of his marital challenges, (first marriage), and the topsy-turvy emotions he experienced during this troubled period of his life.
As I reflect on what I read in this second part, I couldn’t help thinking how difficult it must’ve been for Aldrin to “come back down to earth,” after achieving such a massive and history changing accomplishment.
These years were challenging for Mr. Aldrin, and I felt for the man as I read of these trials. But having said all that, there seemed to be a kind of inevitability to what almost anyone would go through if they experienced these, “post mission years.”
And by the third section, I found myself skim reading, as if I were reading an account of a man who long before had achieved his dream and the rest of his life was spent in high living with dazzling friends, but with no real purpose anymore.
I would’ve loved reading of a “new moon goal” kind of energy and passion for Buzz Aldrin in these later years. Maybe he would mentor young people entering the sciences or use his monumental fame to help bring the plight of America’s broken education system back into the media attention. In my mind’s eye, he might play an active role in courting the nation’s “best and brightest” to take on careers at NASA.
But what I read was nothing like any of these things, and depressingly, it was much less substantial than I had hoped.
And in my opinion, this is the tragedy of this book, one that begins so brilliantly, the fades away as it goes. And in the end, it left me with a feeling similar to the open space that Buzz Aldrin explored.
Empty.
For me, after reading this book, I saw that this idea of making the best of every situation you find yourself in, reaching out for help from good people and letting them help you with your burdens is the bedrock principle of the three phases of this book.
In the moon landing section of the book, for example, I read Aldrin’s accounts of near misses, potential perils, and awe-inspiring moments of triumph that the astronauts of Apollo experienced while on their iconic mission.
This phase of Aldrin’s story contained the most dramatic examples of the idea of, “making the best of every situation,” not to mention the almost “brothers in combat” kind of trust and interdependence that must have been forged between Armstrong, Aldrin, and Collins.
The second section of the book is the one in which Aldrin talks of his marital challenges, (first marriage), and the topsy-turvy emotions he experienced during this troubled period of his life.
As I reflect on what I read in this second part, I couldn’t help thinking how difficult it must’ve been for Aldrin to “come back down to earth,” after achieving such a massive and history changing accomplishment.
These years were challenging for Mr. Aldrin, and I felt for the man as I read of these trials. But having said all that, there seemed to be a kind of inevitability to what almost anyone would go through if they experienced these, “post mission years.”
And by the third section, I found myself skim reading, as if I were reading an account of a man who long before had achieved his dream and the rest of his life was spent in high living with dazzling friends, but with no real purpose anymore.
I would’ve loved reading of a “new moon goal” kind of energy and passion for Buzz Aldrin in these later years. Maybe he would mentor young people entering the sciences or use his monumental fame to help bring the plight of America’s broken education system back into the media attention. In my mind’s eye, he might play an active role in courting the nation’s “best and brightest” to take on careers at NASA.
But what I read was nothing like any of these things, and depressingly, it was much less substantial than I had hoped.
And in my opinion, this is the tragedy of this book, one that begins so brilliantly, the fades away as it goes. And in the end, it left me with a feeling similar to the open space that Buzz Aldrin explored.
Empty.
May 16, 2019
This is a hard book to evaluate. I thought this book would be more about space and NASA, so I wasn't prepared for all the delving into his personal life. Yeah, I know: "don't judge a book by its cover"... but, c'mon... the cover has an astronaut... in space...
In any case, Buzz is safely home from the moon with 250 pages remaining in the book. I think Buzz Aldrin is brave for discussing his issues with alcoholism, and perhaps it could help others. I'm just not sure it's in my wheelhouse. Within these problems and "blue funks" (temporary bouts of depression where he refuses to do anything?) there are interesting discussions that lean more toward the technical side or his ideas for space flight. It was a bit of a struggle to get to the worthwhile bits at times, so I think it depends what one is looking for in a book.
The most tedious part (for me) by far was his descriptions of his third wife. He takes an enormous amount of time telling about her family (parents' names and history) and the details of her first marriage. It also really bugs me when a first person narrator claims to know the operations of other people's minds - 'cause, boy, did he know every thought his third wife and ex-husband had in their marriage. Why are we even reading about their marriage?? (This is unnecessary ranting. I was REALLY put off by that section. Yeesh.)
As other reviewers have mentioned, Buzz Aldrin does come across as self-congratulatory and drops quite a few names near the end. Buuut... he deserves all the kudos, methinks. And is it name-dropping if a quasi-celebrity talks about other celebrities? I do think he's brought a lot of attention to the space program -probably more than any other astronaut- and you don't do that by being humble.
I don't know if I would have read this if I'd realized just how autobiographical it was, so that was my own fault. While I wouldn't necessarily recommend this book, I did quite enjoy the first hand recounting of the Apollo 11 mission. So...read the first fifty pages, have a gander at the pictures, and skim the rest.
In any case, Buzz is safely home from the moon with 250 pages remaining in the book. I think Buzz Aldrin is brave for discussing his issues with alcoholism, and perhaps it could help others. I'm just not sure it's in my wheelhouse. Within these problems and "blue funks" (temporary bouts of depression where he refuses to do anything?) there are interesting discussions that lean more toward the technical side or his ideas for space flight. It was a bit of a struggle to get to the worthwhile bits at times, so I think it depends what one is looking for in a book.
The most tedious part (for me) by far was his descriptions of his third wife. He takes an enormous amount of time telling about her family (parents' names and history) and the details of her first marriage. It also really bugs me when a first person narrator claims to know the operations of other people's minds - 'cause, boy, did he know every thought his third wife and ex-husband had in their marriage. Why are we even reading about their marriage?? (This is unnecessary ranting. I was REALLY put off by that section. Yeesh.)
As other reviewers have mentioned, Buzz Aldrin does come across as self-congratulatory and drops quite a few names near the end. Buuut... he deserves all the kudos, methinks. And is it name-dropping if a quasi-celebrity talks about other celebrities? I do think he's brought a lot of attention to the space program -probably more than any other astronaut- and you don't do that by being humble.
I don't know if I would have read this if I'd realized just how autobiographical it was, so that was my own fault. While I wouldn't necessarily recommend this book, I did quite enjoy the first hand recounting of the Apollo 11 mission. So...read the first fifty pages, have a gander at the pictures, and skim the rest.
April 18, 2021
Aldrin gets candid in his memoir, since the title refers not only to the surface of the moon, but to his battle with depression and alcoholism. After achieving international fame as the second man on the moon, Aldrin had to cope with constant publicity. In the decade and a half after Apollo 11 he often resorted to alcohol to lift him out of his blue moods in a harmful cycle of addiction. Even then, he was honest about being treated for his condition. It was pretty much unheard of for a man to own up to depression in the 1970’s, especially someone as successful as Aldrin.
There’s not a whole lot about his experience in space, but Aldrin does advocate for continued space exploration and the possibilities of space tourism. I had no idea he did his doctoral work at MIT on orbital mechanics, so yeah, he’s an authority. Once he got sober and started life with his current wife Lois, Aldrin did a lot more publicity to champion his ideas. I don’t mind the name dropping or pop culture reference whatsoever! He’s a public figure who has led a fascinating life, rubbing elbows with incredible people along the way. He loved voicing himself on The Simpsons, he went to the North Pole, he rode in a submersible to the Titanic, he met royalty. All because he’s Buzz Aldrin. His is an extraordinary life, not without his share of challenges, and he tells his story with candor, humor, and integrity.
There’s not a whole lot about his experience in space, but Aldrin does advocate for continued space exploration and the possibilities of space tourism. I had no idea he did his doctoral work at MIT on orbital mechanics, so yeah, he’s an authority. Once he got sober and started life with his current wife Lois, Aldrin did a lot more publicity to champion his ideas. I don’t mind the name dropping or pop culture reference whatsoever! He’s a public figure who has led a fascinating life, rubbing elbows with incredible people along the way. He loved voicing himself on The Simpsons, he went to the North Pole, he rode in a submersible to the Titanic, he met royalty. All because he’s Buzz Aldrin. His is an extraordinary life, not without his share of challenges, and he tells his story with candor, humor, and integrity.
June 11, 2022
Split rating on the four stars.
I'll give it a semi-generous 5 for biography, 3 for NASA (and private flight) boosterism.
On the bio side? I knew about Buzz's depression and alcoholism. Did not know that both his mother and maternal grandfather committed suicide. Buzz thinks his mom did so in 1968 in part because she didn't want to bear the stress of Apollo 11. (That said, Buzz talks not at all about his childhood, including going little into what must have been surely a conflicted and competitive childhood and adult relationship with his famous in his own right dad, the main reason this half of the review is a semi-generous 5.)
Buzz seems at least 3/4 honest on the whole contretemps of who was going to put the first foot on the moon, per Apollo 11. He's also honest about being a playboy, both during his first marriage and after his first and second.
Interestingly, his AA world got a semi-boost from the hands of control freak Clancy, yes, THAT Clancy Imislund, who eventually dumped him!
==
The space tourism and NASA and other boosterism?
Buzz consistently underestimates the cost to send humans to Mars, underestimates the danger (doesn't even discuss solar radiation, for example) and provides no clear definition of benefits. He also seems to still be locked into a quasi-Cold War mindset on "Merika has to do this."
I'll give it a semi-generous 5 for biography, 3 for NASA (and private flight) boosterism.
On the bio side? I knew about Buzz's depression and alcoholism. Did not know that both his mother and maternal grandfather committed suicide. Buzz thinks his mom did so in 1968 in part because she didn't want to bear the stress of Apollo 11. (That said, Buzz talks not at all about his childhood, including going little into what must have been surely a conflicted and competitive childhood and adult relationship with his famous in his own right dad, the main reason this half of the review is a semi-generous 5.)
Buzz seems at least 3/4 honest on the whole contretemps of who was going to put the first foot on the moon, per Apollo 11. He's also honest about being a playboy, both during his first marriage and after his first and second.
Interestingly, his AA world got a semi-boost from the hands of control freak Clancy, yes, THAT Clancy Imislund, who eventually dumped him!
==
The space tourism and NASA and other boosterism?
Buzz consistently underestimates the cost to send humans to Mars, underestimates the danger (doesn't even discuss solar radiation, for example) and provides no clear definition of benefits. He also seems to still be locked into a quasi-Cold War mindset on "Merika has to do this."
June 18, 2017
All American hero. Apollo 11 astronaut and moon walker with Armstrong in 1969. I looked forward to reading his memoir. It still is pretty special for me to remember watching these historic events on a fuzzy black and white tv. Aldrin's memoir began with the extraordinary Apollo 11 achievement, but came down to earth with a bump.
His account of his struggles with depression and his alcoholism along with his first marriage break-up was sad to read, but the further I travelled in this man's space, the gravity of his life became increasingly crushing. A second wife, a second divorce and all the mushy details of his new ideal partner Lois, his third wife. Aldrin published this money maker in 2009, praising his wife and her family for turning his life around. (Not really a surprise, he filed for divorce in 2011.)
Instead of engaging with this man, I crawled through most of his book, which I found to be a promo of all things Aldrin. No, not for me....buzz off!
His account of his struggles with depression and his alcoholism along with his first marriage break-up was sad to read, but the further I travelled in this man's space, the gravity of his life became increasingly crushing. A second wife, a second divorce and all the mushy details of his new ideal partner Lois, his third wife. Aldrin published this money maker in 2009, praising his wife and her family for turning his life around. (Not really a surprise, he filed for divorce in 2011.)
Instead of engaging with this man, I crawled through most of his book, which I found to be a promo of all things Aldrin. No, not for me....buzz off!
August 28, 2019
Early in the book, Aldrin recalls saying that he was an engineer, not a poet. That certainly shows in the quality of the writing. But I put that more on the editors who, on more than one occasion, demonstrate they don't know the difference between I and me, and rely on far too many commas and exclamation points than should be allowed in adult writing.
This book essentially picks up after the moon landing and is not at all about engineering, the space race, or politics, but a treatise about mental health, alcoholism, and finding a sense of purpose. There are some interesting anecdotes but the book seems as empty as the journey. Perhaps purposefully so. There are also some ideas in the book that today may be considered dangerous in the mental health community, such as depression being a choice.
Most astronauts retreated from the public eye, but Buzz Aldrin stayed active so this is certainly a unique story in that we do not have many opportunities to hear in depth about what Apollo astronauts did after their moon landings.
This book essentially picks up after the moon landing and is not at all about engineering, the space race, or politics, but a treatise about mental health, alcoholism, and finding a sense of purpose. There are some interesting anecdotes but the book seems as empty as the journey. Perhaps purposefully so. There are also some ideas in the book that today may be considered dangerous in the mental health community, such as depression being a choice.
Most astronauts retreated from the public eye, but Buzz Aldrin stayed active so this is certainly a unique story in that we do not have many opportunities to hear in depth about what Apollo astronauts did after their moon landings.
August 27, 2020
The first part of the book is magnificent. This focus is on the Apollo 11 mission to the moon and the return journey. But this is only a fraction of the novel. We get to dive into Aldrin's life as he sees and he comes across pretty selfish.
He is brave in a sense to bring us his depression and alcoholism issues. However the same spin is put on the narrative time and again, so much so it becomes boring.
He tells us about his relationships with his wives so much so that his wife Lois gets a whole portion of the book to herself and her life.
Somehow it didn't seem relevant.
Parts of his story are repeated several times and the book could have done with a decent edit.
What does come across well is Aldrin's intelligence and his commitment to keep America going to space and Mars in particular.
He may not live to see it but there is always a chance.
He is brave in a sense to bring us his depression and alcoholism issues. However the same spin is put on the narrative time and again, so much so it becomes boring.
He tells us about his relationships with his wives so much so that his wife Lois gets a whole portion of the book to herself and her life.
Somehow it didn't seem relevant.
Parts of his story are repeated several times and the book could have done with a decent edit.
What does come across well is Aldrin's intelligence and his commitment to keep America going to space and Mars in particular.
He may not live to see it but there is always a chance.
October 12, 2019
Really good book. I never read Buzz's first autobiography, so I'm not sure how much of it is a repeat; the first third of the book is the Apollo 11 moon landing, the second third is the post-landing deep depression and alcoholism that Buzz details with remarkable candor, and the rest of the book is about ... well, ordinary Buzz with ordinary ideas for projects that will keep him moving forward. Glad I read it, but I think ordinary Buzz is probably a lot more fascinating in real life than on the page.
June 15, 2020
At first I thought this would be a book about Buzz Aldrin's historic moon mission, and it was, but it was also so much more. It was fascinating to learn about the life and struggles of Mr. Aldrin. One may think famous people have it easy, but it couldn't be further from the truth for Mr. Aldrin. Very interesting read!
August 27, 2024
The first half of this book was extremely interesting and well written. I thought it captured intricate feelings associated with the moon landing and subsequent struggles with mental health, family and career. The last half rambled on, sounding more self serving than for the audience. I also didn't love Buzz's take on certain issues such as depression, family/marriage and space tourism.
March 1, 2018
“Mankind will set up camp on one of the moons of Mars and then eventually on the red planet itself. Why? Because it is there; just waiting to be explored.” ~ Buzz Aldrin
June 20, 2018
The first part, about his work with NASA and trip to the moon, is the best part of the book. The rest is about Buzz - not so much his life, but him. It wasn’t what I’d expected.
July 25, 2023
The first part about the moon landing is fantastic, then he just uses a whole lot of words to tell you how amazing he thinks he is.
March 10, 2017
Read with a tutoring kid
November 16, 2024
I have finished reading “Magnificent Desolation: The Long Journey Home From the Moon” by Buzz Aldrin and Ken Abraham.
Buzz Aldrin is the second man to walk on the Moon as part of the Apollo 11 mission.
“Space flights are merely an escape, a fleeing away from oneself I, because it is easier to go to Mars or the Moon than it is to penetrate one’s own soul”.
Carl Jung (cited from text)
This is a Space book purely on the terms of the Astronaut who wrote it. This is evident from the very start where Buzz Aldrin recollects standing alone on the gantry leading to the rocket that will take him and his colleagues (Neil Armstrong and Michael Collins) to the Moon. He chooses to recollect that small but significant instance where he could see the other launchpads, both from his previous mission, but also one where the ill-fated Apollo 1 crew (including his friend Ed White) lost their lives in a ground test. In this passage he conveys how Space Travel has always been associated by many people with a sense of adventure, but also a sense of danger.
The first few chapters recount the Apollo 11 mission from beginning to end, seemingly with a two agendas on the author’s mind. The first being to correct what the author would describe as old gossip around his lobbying to be the first man to walk on the Moon, the latter to tackle similar allegations about him not taking many pictures of Neil Armstrong on the Moon out of spite. The first charge, after talking at length about mission precedent for the Commander NOT to be the first out of a Spacecraft under NASA regulations, Buzz Aldrin seems to admit to going no further with his lobbying than any other competitive Navy pilot would do. This charge I understand was NOT supported by his Apollo 11 crewmate Michael Collins who felt that Buzz Aldrin was not professional in his conduct. To the second charge, I am more inclined to give the author the benefit of the doubt.
The rest of the book forces us to consider questions often neglected when discussing Astronauts from famous missions. What do Astronauts do with their lives when they are grounded? How do famous Astronauts as people adjust, knowing that whatever they do next will never be seen as significant as what they have done before? It is the latter question which preoccupies most of the discussions about this book. The stories it tells from then on feature a lot of falls from grace followed by false dawns, ending in an eventual and determined renewed sense of purpose.
One cannot fault Buzz Aldrin for coming clear about his demons. He is an admitted alcoholic, who has before long been in denial about his condition. His life from Apollo 11 has often been haunted by periods of what he termed the “blue funk”, episodes of depression which could be crippling. When the blue funk descended this has led in the past for the author to cancel speaking engagements, but on the worst episodes to see him stay in bed for several days. Through great effort and several treatments Buzz Aldrin has been sober since 1978, but he still has occasional blue funks now and then, although this has become more controllable with sustained sobriety. The author speculates openly in the book how he has long felt that these bouts of depression were linked to existential uncertainty over his own life after reaching the room. Put simply, in order to keep himself going he needed a new role.
Over the years Buzz Aldrin has built himself up a new role, as an advocate not only for further Space Exploration but for Space Tourism. He has some intriguing arguments in favour of the latter, such as tactically reinvesting money from wealthy Space tourists to improve launch infrastructure, to using such Space Flight as a way of reducing overall launch costs. Buzz Aldrin, having a doctorate from MIT relating to Orbital Mechanics, also shared extensively in the book his designs for launching orbital gravity driven Earth to Mars space craft, which would effectively ferry people and equipment between the two planets non-stop. These designs even included rotating spheres to produce gravity for crew members. By the author’s estimations, these journeys could take about 5 months, as opposed to earlier estimated journeys to Mars which cite at least a couple of years flight time. I am not anywhere near an expert in this field but I think if these ideas have any merit, then they are well worth exploring. Perhaps they might be, since Buzz Aldrin endorsed Trump to become President and the new Administration is believed to have an ambitious agenda for Space.
Buzz Aldrin is very open in the book about the break-up of his marriages. I did allow myself smile when he described himself as “on a roll” when he faced two divorces in as many years. In fairness to him, he seems to give his exes a fair shake. He ruefully cited his reputation as a ladies man among the NASA astronaut fraternity, so it is clear that he harbours few delusions about how some of his detractors see him. I was somewhat saddened to hear that he has since divorced his third wife, Lois who he talks most about in the book, but I hope for his sake that fourth time is a charm. There are times where addresses trauma in his own family. I had no idea before that his mother committed suicide between his Gemini 12 mission and Apollo 11. He acknowledged that his father was a difficult character but seemed rather defensive about how deep that went. Certainly, from what I have reads outside of this book, I understand that Buzz’s father was emotionally abusive and forced him to be as actively competitive as he was. Infamously when it was announced that Buzz Aldrin would be the second man to walk on the Moon, instead of congratulating him his father merely asked him why he wasn’t going to be the first. These strained parental relationships show some similarities between Buzz Aldrin and Elvis Presley.
This book, while dated by some events in Space development, remains an honest reflection of one of the most famous men of our time, warts and all. Buzz Aldrin is an interesting case of someone who swings between prickly self-confidence and existential anxiety that borders on self-destruction. In many ways some of this anxiety isn’t completely foreign as a concept, indeed many of us worry about being useful in the world. Buzz Aldrin has fought hard to be useful and has sometimes rubbed people up the wrong way when displaying his enthusiasm. One of the many things this book does well is to earnestly convey that Astronauts are not supermen and are prone to many of the vulnerabilities that we all face. How would any of us handle being a modest specialist in our field to become overnight one of the most famous people who has ever lived? Since we can barely conceive of this, in what position are we to judge Buzz Aldrin? He has certainly earned his place to tell his story as he sees it and I am grateful for having read it.
Buzz Aldrin is the second man to walk on the Moon as part of the Apollo 11 mission.
“Space flights are merely an escape, a fleeing away from oneself I, because it is easier to go to Mars or the Moon than it is to penetrate one’s own soul”.
Carl Jung (cited from text)
This is a Space book purely on the terms of the Astronaut who wrote it. This is evident from the very start where Buzz Aldrin recollects standing alone on the gantry leading to the rocket that will take him and his colleagues (Neil Armstrong and Michael Collins) to the Moon. He chooses to recollect that small but significant instance where he could see the other launchpads, both from his previous mission, but also one where the ill-fated Apollo 1 crew (including his friend Ed White) lost their lives in a ground test. In this passage he conveys how Space Travel has always been associated by many people with a sense of adventure, but also a sense of danger.
The first few chapters recount the Apollo 11 mission from beginning to end, seemingly with a two agendas on the author’s mind. The first being to correct what the author would describe as old gossip around his lobbying to be the first man to walk on the Moon, the latter to tackle similar allegations about him not taking many pictures of Neil Armstrong on the Moon out of spite. The first charge, after talking at length about mission precedent for the Commander NOT to be the first out of a Spacecraft under NASA regulations, Buzz Aldrin seems to admit to going no further with his lobbying than any other competitive Navy pilot would do. This charge I understand was NOT supported by his Apollo 11 crewmate Michael Collins who felt that Buzz Aldrin was not professional in his conduct. To the second charge, I am more inclined to give the author the benefit of the doubt.
The rest of the book forces us to consider questions often neglected when discussing Astronauts from famous missions. What do Astronauts do with their lives when they are grounded? How do famous Astronauts as people adjust, knowing that whatever they do next will never be seen as significant as what they have done before? It is the latter question which preoccupies most of the discussions about this book. The stories it tells from then on feature a lot of falls from grace followed by false dawns, ending in an eventual and determined renewed sense of purpose.
One cannot fault Buzz Aldrin for coming clear about his demons. He is an admitted alcoholic, who has before long been in denial about his condition. His life from Apollo 11 has often been haunted by periods of what he termed the “blue funk”, episodes of depression which could be crippling. When the blue funk descended this has led in the past for the author to cancel speaking engagements, but on the worst episodes to see him stay in bed for several days. Through great effort and several treatments Buzz Aldrin has been sober since 1978, but he still has occasional blue funks now and then, although this has become more controllable with sustained sobriety. The author speculates openly in the book how he has long felt that these bouts of depression were linked to existential uncertainty over his own life after reaching the room. Put simply, in order to keep himself going he needed a new role.
Over the years Buzz Aldrin has built himself up a new role, as an advocate not only for further Space Exploration but for Space Tourism. He has some intriguing arguments in favour of the latter, such as tactically reinvesting money from wealthy Space tourists to improve launch infrastructure, to using such Space Flight as a way of reducing overall launch costs. Buzz Aldrin, having a doctorate from MIT relating to Orbital Mechanics, also shared extensively in the book his designs for launching orbital gravity driven Earth to Mars space craft, which would effectively ferry people and equipment between the two planets non-stop. These designs even included rotating spheres to produce gravity for crew members. By the author’s estimations, these journeys could take about 5 months, as opposed to earlier estimated journeys to Mars which cite at least a couple of years flight time. I am not anywhere near an expert in this field but I think if these ideas have any merit, then they are well worth exploring. Perhaps they might be, since Buzz Aldrin endorsed Trump to become President and the new Administration is believed to have an ambitious agenda for Space.
Buzz Aldrin is very open in the book about the break-up of his marriages. I did allow myself smile when he described himself as “on a roll” when he faced two divorces in as many years. In fairness to him, he seems to give his exes a fair shake. He ruefully cited his reputation as a ladies man among the NASA astronaut fraternity, so it is clear that he harbours few delusions about how some of his detractors see him. I was somewhat saddened to hear that he has since divorced his third wife, Lois who he talks most about in the book, but I hope for his sake that fourth time is a charm. There are times where addresses trauma in his own family. I had no idea before that his mother committed suicide between his Gemini 12 mission and Apollo 11. He acknowledged that his father was a difficult character but seemed rather defensive about how deep that went. Certainly, from what I have reads outside of this book, I understand that Buzz’s father was emotionally abusive and forced him to be as actively competitive as he was. Infamously when it was announced that Buzz Aldrin would be the second man to walk on the Moon, instead of congratulating him his father merely asked him why he wasn’t going to be the first. These strained parental relationships show some similarities between Buzz Aldrin and Elvis Presley.
This book, while dated by some events in Space development, remains an honest reflection of one of the most famous men of our time, warts and all. Buzz Aldrin is an interesting case of someone who swings between prickly self-confidence and existential anxiety that borders on self-destruction. In many ways some of this anxiety isn’t completely foreign as a concept, indeed many of us worry about being useful in the world. Buzz Aldrin has fought hard to be useful and has sometimes rubbed people up the wrong way when displaying his enthusiasm. One of the many things this book does well is to earnestly convey that Astronauts are not supermen and are prone to many of the vulnerabilities that we all face. How would any of us handle being a modest specialist in our field to become overnight one of the most famous people who has ever lived? Since we can barely conceive of this, in what position are we to judge Buzz Aldrin? He has certainly earned his place to tell his story as he sees it and I am grateful for having read it.
June 11, 2012
I think this memoir was mentioned in Mary Roach's Packing for Mars: The Curious Science of Life in the Void or possible Mike Mullane's Riding Rockets: The Outrageous Tales of a Space Shuttle Astronaut; either way, I checked out the library's Kindle version and spent several days with Mr. Aldrin.
As you might guess from the subtitle, this memoir starts with the events of Apollo 11 (which are wonderfully described and easily the best part of this book) and traces his life from that high point. Aldrin provides very little biographical background on his childhood or what led him to becoming the second man to step foot on the moon; but does not stint on sharing what happened afterwards.
While I admire Aldrin's courage in describing his struggles with alcoholism and depression; and certainly appreciate all he has done and continues to do for the future of space travel, he seemed a little glib at times and the last few chapters felt almost too "Isn't my life grand?"; it rang a bit hollow for me, especially knowing that he has now divorced the "love of his life" described in these pages.
Regardless, the memoir was an enjoyable read, and provided some insight into not only Aldrin's life, but that of the environment that shaped this reluctant celebrity. I still think Mike Mullane is top on my list of astronauts I'd like to meet, but Buzz would definitely be on the short list (tho I guess I shouldn't buy him a drink )
As you might guess from the subtitle, this memoir starts with the events of Apollo 11 (which are wonderfully described and easily the best part of this book) and traces his life from that high point. Aldrin provides very little biographical background on his childhood or what led him to becoming the second man to step foot on the moon; but does not stint on sharing what happened afterwards.
While I admire Aldrin's courage in describing his struggles with alcoholism and depression; and certainly appreciate all he has done and continues to do for the future of space travel, he seemed a little glib at times and the last few chapters felt almost too "Isn't my life grand?"; it rang a bit hollow for me, especially knowing that he has now divorced the "love of his life" described in these pages.
Regardless, the memoir was an enjoyable read, and provided some insight into not only Aldrin's life, but that of the environment that shaped this reluctant celebrity. I still think Mike Mullane is top on my list of astronauts I'd like to meet, but Buzz would definitely be on the short list (tho I guess I shouldn't buy him a drink )
November 19, 2011
This was probably my least favorite of the astronaut bio's that I've read so far, primarily because it often dives rather deeply into some tedious details of Aldrin's personal life. Sometimes, in these kinds of books we are left craving for more, but in this one I found a little bit too much and in some cases it got awfully syrupy and other cases overly self-serving.
Still, I have to credit Buzz for telling the other side of the story as well, being frankly honest about how useless he could be come when he was depressed and/or drunk. And his story of how he finally dried out and got the cure is surely inspirational for anyone else fighting those demons.
Reading how he's tried relentlessly since the end of the Apollo program to get humans back to the Moon and/or Mars at times becomes a little pathetic, like Sancho tilting and windmills. Buzz was certainly born at the right time and place and did all the right things to be one of the 12 lucky ones to walk on the moon, but he was born way too early to ever see humans return to the Moon, let alone venture to Mars.
In the final chapter of the book he gushes how his 3rd wife, Lois, of 23 years is the be-all, end-all inspiration and savior of his life. The book was written in 2008 and published in 2009. In June of 2011 he filed for divorce and was reported to be having an affair with a 51-year-old, that's 30s years is junior. Lois is asking for $25,000 a month and may not be lily white herself. It seems as if Buzz's long journey home from the moon is not quite over yet.
Still, I have to credit Buzz for telling the other side of the story as well, being frankly honest about how useless he could be come when he was depressed and/or drunk. And his story of how he finally dried out and got the cure is surely inspirational for anyone else fighting those demons.
Reading how he's tried relentlessly since the end of the Apollo program to get humans back to the Moon and/or Mars at times becomes a little pathetic, like Sancho tilting and windmills. Buzz was certainly born at the right time and place and did all the right things to be one of the 12 lucky ones to walk on the moon, but he was born way too early to ever see humans return to the Moon, let alone venture to Mars.
In the final chapter of the book he gushes how his 3rd wife, Lois, of 23 years is the be-all, end-all inspiration and savior of his life. The book was written in 2008 and published in 2009. In June of 2011 he filed for divorce and was reported to be having an affair with a 51-year-old, that's 30s years is junior. Lois is asking for $25,000 a month and may not be lily white herself. It seems as if Buzz's long journey home from the moon is not quite over yet.
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