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It Seemed Important at the Time: A Romance Memoir
An elegant, witty, frank, touching, and deeply personal account of the loves both great and fleeting in the life of one of America's most celebrated and fabled women.
Born to great wealth yet kept a virtual prisoner by the custody battle that raged between her proper aunt and her self-absorbed, beautiful mother, Gloria Vanderbilt grew up in a special world. Stunningly beautiful herself, yet insecure and with a touch of wildness, she set out at a very early age to find romance. And find it she did. There were love affairs with Howard Hughes, Bill Paley, and Frank Sinatra, to name a few, and one-night stands, which she writes about with delicacy and humor, including one with the young Marlon Brando. There were marriages to men as diverse as Pat De Cicco, who abused her; the legendary conductor Leopold Stokowski, who kept his innermost secrets from her; film director Sidney Lumet; and finally writer Wyatt Cooper, the love of her life.
Now, in an irresistible memoir that is at once ruthlessly forthright, supremely stylish, full of fascinating details, and deeply touching, Gloria Vanderbilt writes at last about the subject on which she has hitherto been silent: the men in her life, why she loved them, and what each affair or marriage meant to her. This is the candid and captivating account of a life that has kept gossip writers speculating for years, as well as Gloria's own intimate description of growing up, living, marrying, and loving in the glare of the limelight and becoming, despite a family as famous and wealthy as America has ever produced, not only her own person but an artist, a designer, a businesswoman, and a writer of rare distinction.
Born to great wealth yet kept a virtual prisoner by the custody battle that raged between her proper aunt and her self-absorbed, beautiful mother, Gloria Vanderbilt grew up in a special world. Stunningly beautiful herself, yet insecure and with a touch of wildness, she set out at a very early age to find romance. And find it she did. There were love affairs with Howard Hughes, Bill Paley, and Frank Sinatra, to name a few, and one-night stands, which she writes about with delicacy and humor, including one with the young Marlon Brando. There were marriages to men as diverse as Pat De Cicco, who abused her; the legendary conductor Leopold Stokowski, who kept his innermost secrets from her; film director Sidney Lumet; and finally writer Wyatt Cooper, the love of her life.
Now, in an irresistible memoir that is at once ruthlessly forthright, supremely stylish, full of fascinating details, and deeply touching, Gloria Vanderbilt writes at last about the subject on which she has hitherto been silent: the men in her life, why she loved them, and what each affair or marriage meant to her. This is the candid and captivating account of a life that has kept gossip writers speculating for years, as well as Gloria's own intimate description of growing up, living, marrying, and loving in the glare of the limelight and becoming, despite a family as famous and wealthy as America has ever produced, not only her own person but an artist, a designer, a businesswoman, and a writer of rare distinction.
188 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 28, 2004
285 people are currently reading
907 people want to read
About the author
Gloria Vanderbilt
37 books78 followersGloria Laura Vanderbilt was an American artist, author, actress, fashion designer, heiress, and socialite. She was a member of the Vanderbilt family of New York and the mother of CNN television anchor Anderson Cooper. Wikipedia
Gloria Laura Vanderbilt was the author of four memoirs and two novels. She contributed to various publications, including The New York Times, Vanity Fair, and Elle, and has received two honorary Doctorates of Fine Arts. She lived in New York City.
Gloria Laura Vanderbilt was the author of four memoirs and two novels. She contributed to various publications, including The New York Times, Vanity Fair, and Elle, and has received two honorary Doctorates of Fine Arts. She lived in New York City.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 99 reviews
July 21, 2019
I’m somewhat embarrassed to admit that I caved in to my curiosity and bought this book(let), even though I should have known better when I saw that the Kindle version cost more than William Boyd’s latest novel. Go figure.
Yes, I was curious to know about her famous affairs with Brandon, Sinatra et all, but Gloria reveals little except that she was, like any groupie, happy to jump into any charismatic lead man’s bed she took a shining to, and like a good trooper, wasn't expecting anything would come of it. She also had no qualms about doing this while she or her partners were still married to someone else.
So the jist of it is that Gloria Vanderbilt was a liberated woman before her time. In today’s word of “Sex and the City”, anything she did back then would be regarded as rather unsurprising today. The fact that she did it back then rather confirms the general rumor that Hollywood has always been a place of easy sex.
I wonder how the public would react if a man had written such a memoir. If he had told about all the stars he had slept with. If he had said, at the end of the book, “Well, we really didn’t have much in common, but boy could she do a great b.j.! What more could a man want?”
Yes, I was curious to know about her famous affairs with Brandon, Sinatra et all, but Gloria reveals little except that she was, like any groupie, happy to jump into any charismatic lead man’s bed she took a shining to, and like a good trooper, wasn't expecting anything would come of it. She also had no qualms about doing this while she or her partners were still married to someone else.
So the jist of it is that Gloria Vanderbilt was a liberated woman before her time. In today’s word of “Sex and the City”, anything she did back then would be regarded as rather unsurprising today. The fact that she did it back then rather confirms the general rumor that Hollywood has always been a place of easy sex.
I wonder how the public would react if a man had written such a memoir. If he had told about all the stars he had slept with. If he had said, at the end of the book, “Well, we really didn’t have much in common, but boy could she do a great b.j.! What more could a man want?”
May 28, 2008
I was entirely disappointed with this portion of Gloria’s memoirs. It offered no real depth of her or of the men in her life, it was more of an overview. I walked away feeling as though she really didn’t shared anything about her true self with the reader; it read more as a list of conquests.
January 5, 2012
The subtitle for book is "A Romance Memoir" so I expected to read about Gloria Vanderbilt's romances throughout her life. What I did not expect was such a disorganized, disjointed account of those romances. When I first started reading, I thought it was written similar to how we remember our past -- short clips, some vividly, some vague. But the more I read, the more I felt there was no organization, forethought, or editing put into this memoir at all. The photos have no labels and bounce from child to adult back to child (and you aren't even sure of who they are photos of). The structure does the same -- it follows no timeline so you are not sure when the events are taking place.
Overall, I was disappointed in this book. Initially I thought I would read Vanderbilt's other works, but now I'm not so sure.
Overall, I was disappointed in this book. Initially I thought I would read Vanderbilt's other works, but now I'm not so sure.
June 25, 2019
I was enticed by the title --- but it turned out to be little more than a recalled list of paramours. It seems that what we got was a few statistics, or maybe some bones with very little meat left on them. I'm sure her recollections are meaningful to her, but she didn't give us much to make us "feel" one way or the other about her romances. Name, rank and serial number -- that's about all. Too bad.
December 15, 2019
Every now & then, you just need some mental bubblegum, and this book fits the bill. It's comprised of vignettes on love, life, & loss from Gloria Vanderbilt. It's not a serious book that will win awards or be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize; it's just the amusing ramblings of a woman who has lived more than her fair share of life. An quick, entertaining read when you just want an escape.
June 25, 2019
Short vignettes of Gloria's various love affairs over the years. (Roald Dahl!?!) Very breezy and conversational.
Rest in peace, Gloria. I'm glad you had fun while you were here.
Rest in peace, Gloria. I'm glad you had fun while you were here.
May 23, 2016
This was like sitting next to a drunk old woman on an airplane.
February 15, 2009
I was expecting/hoping for a thoughtful memoir dotted with well-chosen gossip and romantic memories of old Hollywood and some stories about Vanderbilt's jean designing. Now, nothing against Gloria, whom I'm sure is a lovely lady, and I do love her son, Anderson Cooper, but this book was not fun to read. I think Gloria thought that telling us about all the sex she had would be charming, but it's kind of icky. Gloria is the unsung Wilt Chamberlain of American women. I would wonder if she had ever slept with Wilt, but I am pretty certain she did not because she doesn't describe having an affair with him in this book. And since she describes having an affair with practically everyone else, I'm sure she wouldn't leave Wilt out. The tone is also a little on the haughty side. Gloria's stories are not un-interesting. This book was just edited badly. Someone needed to tell Gloria, let's delete everything that's only interesting because you happen to be Gloria Vanderbilt; let's leave in everything else that is interesting itself as a story. I loathe giving bad reviews so I am sorry to say this, but I have to. A few good things though -- Gloria advises not to have affairs with married men. I know we've heard this before, but, coming from Gloria, who's tried it at least twice, you have to believe it. Second, I did like her ending where she says that you never know where the next love affair will come from and that today could be the day you meet the love of your life. . .I did appreciate that optimistic tone.
September 28, 2017
it is really hard for me to give a book 1 star, but this book just missed the mark. Writing style is not for my taste as she constantly takes readers out of the story to ask them a question. It's annoying, don't YOU think? While this was supposed to be a romantic essay, I thought she came off more whore-y than anything else. Talking endlessly about her love-ahs including men that were married, and in her youth some curious girls. Mostly I just thought is she out of her MIND to think that most women can relate to these stories? Dates where she is whisked off to far lands. She pretends that being GLORIA VANDERBILT and all her glory and money is nothing special, but I'll tell you something Gloria Vanderbilt, Not a lot of woman get asked as a first date to Paris. I think she was trying to be chummy and coy with all the silly 'don't you agree?' and 'who wouldn't say yes to a complete stranger taking me to London' well, I wouldn't. But then again, I would never write a book about my 'next great love' while so clearly rejecting the previous. I'm sure her children loved this book.
April 14, 2016
It was a good thing I read about Gloria's life on Wikipedia before I started this book because it sure jumped around to different times in her life and not in a good way. Interesting how she analyzed the reasons she was with different men and what they quenched in her desires and her psychological shortcomings. I am now reading the recent book that Anderson Cooper wrote about her and with her. He is a much better writer. I did like her honesty and rawness though!
June 4, 2022
“Falling in love is an act of the imagination”
“Why couldn’t I have left because I’d met myself”
“It’s only when you expect permanence that life disappoints you”
“In my mind’s eye I see everyone in the world as links in an endless chain, including you and me, connected by an energy of compassion. So let’s be kind to each other, for everyone we meet is fighting a great battle”
January 9, 2024
A slim biography covering a narrow piece of Gloria Vanderbilt’s life, but broadly revealing of the woman so deeply scarred by her childhood and the tenuous relationship with her mother. Frank, tragic, discreet—little Gloria was never really “happy at last.”
May 8, 2016
Loved it. It was as if Gloria herself were sitting across from me recounting various events from her life. Fun/quick read
January 15, 2024
Interesting details straight from Gloria's mouth.
September 28, 2025
3 stars
review soon
review soon
November 18, 2017
This was a fun, quick read & felt like sitting down with Gloria Vanderbilt and having a meandering conversation with her, full of good dish about her romances. What's not to like about that?
May 8, 2022
Well I just finished this. I gave it 2 stars, actually 1 1/2 is better but 1/2 star ratings aren't possible. (I don't get WHY). I wasn't going to write reviews anymore but make an exception here.
It was superficial, poorly written, non-linear, and chapters so short it's like an oral history, like someone dictating that portion of their life to you. It kind of felt like a series of clips or scenes from a movie. The TITLES of the chapters were sometimes humorous, like 'Tweedledum and Tweedledee" and "King Arthur and Lady Guinevere."
I especially HATE that not a single picture had a caption. That REALLY irritated me! How am I supposed to know who those people are? I only recognized Frank Sinatra and Howard Hughes, as I already knew what they looked like.
There's no real depth here. The title implies that she would elaborate on WHY it was important at the time, and why NOW, in hindsight, it is not. I thought her age would give her wisdom and insight into these romances, writing how they changed her as a person or her perspective on romance itself.
It was also annoying to read names of people I never heard of, like Pat de Cicco. I had to look him up and found out he was a movie producer and agent....with alleged mob ties! But why couldn't she have just written that so I didn't have to look him up? It was horrifying to read he was abusive, and since this was a different era when that kind of thing was hushed up (unlike now), she could have written more about that. Did she tell anyone? Did she feel it was her fault, like many abused do? Did she fear for her life most of the time?
I always liked Van Heflin, and they were "briefly engaged". For how long? How did they meet? Was it "love at first sight"???!! I wanted to know why they broke up and whose decision it was. Was she really in love or was it an infatuation? If so, when did she realize it? And this was a pattern with the whole book. She doesn't say how old she was when she dated so and so, or what year it was or anything. It felt choppy and disjointed, for lack of better words.
After I found out Anderson Cooper is her son, I got more interested in her, as I was always fascinated with people known by their first name only. I do remember having her jeans and perfume, so I've been wanting to read about her life forever.
The average woman can't relate to these romances but I'm sure a lot of it is something most women can only dream about. Still, she didn't really write about what so and so was REALLY like. That's the point of writing a memoir---to get personal. I don't mean graphic sex details, but what was he (whoever it was) like? Extroverted, shy, intellectual, etc.? What interests did he have? What drew them together? What did they talk about? Hearing how they flew to Paris in his private jet for lunch was fun to read, but once there what happened?? Did he have any quirks, like he has to eat dinner at 6pm, no matter where it is or what they are eating? Didn't miss Saturday morning cartoons?
More on what the average woman can relate to is what I was also hoping for, such as she got stood up or he never called when he said he would! If it happened to a Vanderbilt, it feels like vindication in some way: It's like it has nothing to do with your wealth or you at all. It makes her look more normal, in spite of the world she grew up in. I mean even rich women sometimes wait by the phone (no cell phones in those days!) or struggle with "what to wear" when meeting him.
For actors, I would have liked to know how much they were like the characters they played, such as was he a tough guy in real life or just on screen.
She could have written more about what effect they had on her career, self-esteem, finances, etc. You know, open up. And WHAT seemed important at the time? They always say age brings wisdom.
There was a few pages in it of some depth, like when she wrote about her Carter, the son she lost to suicide. And meeting Wyatt Cooper.
It pretty much reads like a list of men she had romances or one-night stands with, but there's no real feeling or anything to keep you turning the pages. I was glad it was just under 160 pages and was happy when I finished it. I picked it up to read while waiting on Once Upon A Time to arrive from the library, since it's a short book.
Her sense of humor did come through now and then, and it does end on an optimistic note: You may not be a Vanderbilt, but you never know where your next romance could go.
She's written other books, as well as novels which I'll check out someday.
I hope her autobiography, (OUAT), is better. I'm just a few pages into that though.
It was superficial, poorly written, non-linear, and chapters so short it's like an oral history, like someone dictating that portion of their life to you. It kind of felt like a series of clips or scenes from a movie. The TITLES of the chapters were sometimes humorous, like 'Tweedledum and Tweedledee" and "King Arthur and Lady Guinevere."
I especially HATE that not a single picture had a caption. That REALLY irritated me! How am I supposed to know who those people are? I only recognized Frank Sinatra and Howard Hughes, as I already knew what they looked like.
There's no real depth here. The title implies that she would elaborate on WHY it was important at the time, and why NOW, in hindsight, it is not. I thought her age would give her wisdom and insight into these romances, writing how they changed her as a person or her perspective on romance itself.
It was also annoying to read names of people I never heard of, like Pat de Cicco. I had to look him up and found out he was a movie producer and agent....with alleged mob ties! But why couldn't she have just written that so I didn't have to look him up? It was horrifying to read he was abusive, and since this was a different era when that kind of thing was hushed up (unlike now), she could have written more about that. Did she tell anyone? Did she feel it was her fault, like many abused do? Did she fear for her life most of the time?
I always liked Van Heflin, and they were "briefly engaged". For how long? How did they meet? Was it "love at first sight"???!! I wanted to know why they broke up and whose decision it was. Was she really in love or was it an infatuation? If so, when did she realize it? And this was a pattern with the whole book. She doesn't say how old she was when she dated so and so, or what year it was or anything. It felt choppy and disjointed, for lack of better words.
After I found out Anderson Cooper is her son, I got more interested in her, as I was always fascinated with people known by their first name only. I do remember having her jeans and perfume, so I've been wanting to read about her life forever.
The average woman can't relate to these romances but I'm sure a lot of it is something most women can only dream about. Still, she didn't really write about what so and so was REALLY like. That's the point of writing a memoir---to get personal. I don't mean graphic sex details, but what was he (whoever it was) like? Extroverted, shy, intellectual, etc.? What interests did he have? What drew them together? What did they talk about? Hearing how they flew to Paris in his private jet for lunch was fun to read, but once there what happened?? Did he have any quirks, like he has to eat dinner at 6pm, no matter where it is or what they are eating? Didn't miss Saturday morning cartoons?
More on what the average woman can relate to is what I was also hoping for, such as she got stood up or he never called when he said he would! If it happened to a Vanderbilt, it feels like vindication in some way: It's like it has nothing to do with your wealth or you at all. It makes her look more normal, in spite of the world she grew up in. I mean even rich women sometimes wait by the phone (no cell phones in those days!) or struggle with "what to wear" when meeting him.
For actors, I would have liked to know how much they were like the characters they played, such as was he a tough guy in real life or just on screen.
She could have written more about what effect they had on her career, self-esteem, finances, etc. You know, open up. And WHAT seemed important at the time? They always say age brings wisdom.
There was a few pages in it of some depth, like when she wrote about her Carter, the son she lost to suicide. And meeting Wyatt Cooper.
It pretty much reads like a list of men she had romances or one-night stands with, but there's no real feeling or anything to keep you turning the pages. I was glad it was just under 160 pages and was happy when I finished it. I picked it up to read while waiting on Once Upon A Time to arrive from the library, since it's a short book.
Her sense of humor did come through now and then, and it does end on an optimistic note: You may not be a Vanderbilt, but you never know where your next romance could go.
She's written other books, as well as novels which I'll check out someday.
I hope her autobiography, (OUAT), is better. I'm just a few pages into that though.
July 18, 2020
Another short memoir of a socialite for the summer reading challenge. Read in under 2 hours.
Written in her 80s, an uber rich old-school socialite recounts her life, focusing mainly on her famous romances. She implies that she was sexually involved with the people mentioned, but does not give specific details. She also talks briefly about her trust fund and later jobs and business ventures.
She starts the book with stories about exploring her sexuality as a youth with a male cousin and then female classmate. She talks about her bi-sexual mother and how "Love is Love". (She does not mention her famous homosexual son.) She ends the book with an African-American man and talks about racism in her upbringing, especially against Jews. Perhaps she intends to shock the reader with her sexual exploits, and it is a shocking considering the cultural morals when she was born in 1924.
In the middle, there is a long string of conventional white men. Some single, some married to her and some married to other women. Very famous names - Howard Hughes, Frank Sinatra, Marlon Brando, Pat DeCicco (actor & mafia man), Leopold Stokowski (famous conductor), Sidney Lumet (movie director) and Wyatt Cooper.
She has a constant need to be liked and can't leave a relationship (even abusive ones) until she has another lined up. She dives into romances head first without thought and then expects sympathy/exceptions when it inevitably goes bad. She is very much ruled by her emotions. The title "It Seemed Important at the Time" implied to me that she later realized certain things are not important. However, this is not the case. The fact that she FELT something was important in a particular moment justified all her further actions. She has temporary morals and marriages, based on her feelings at the time, hopping in and out of many beds and marriages along the way. Despite her claims about constantly learning from life, she has not learned much. She gives horrible advice throughout the book, encouraging readers to follow paths that lead to emptiness.
One thing that struck me as odd was how little she talked about her 4 children from 2 different men. She goes into detail about her trust fund and various jobs/businesses as they impacted her decisions and life. However, she doesn't mention any of the births of her children. There were only a few brief comments that referenced she had children. (Those caused me to google her and get more information. One of her sons is Anderson Cooper from CNN.) Then a story about how one son killed himself and it caused her to take a break from her current married lover for 5 months. Perhaps she is trying to maintain her children's privacy. But they didn't seem to have even been a factor as she made life decisions, such as moving in with another new man. Perhaps the focus of this book was only suppose to be romantic relationships, but it felt odd that she also talked about her various sources of income along the way and not her children. As if her children weren't essential to her life, but her money was.
She is a surprisingly good writer and comes off as likeable despite everything. She gets a lot of grace from not being explicit.
Written in her 80s, an uber rich old-school socialite recounts her life, focusing mainly on her famous romances. She implies that she was sexually involved with the people mentioned, but does not give specific details. She also talks briefly about her trust fund and later jobs and business ventures.
She starts the book with stories about exploring her sexuality as a youth with a male cousin and then female classmate. She talks about her bi-sexual mother and how "Love is Love". (She does not mention her famous homosexual son.) She ends the book with an African-American man and talks about racism in her upbringing, especially against Jews. Perhaps she intends to shock the reader with her sexual exploits, and it is a shocking considering the cultural morals when she was born in 1924.
In the middle, there is a long string of conventional white men. Some single, some married to her and some married to other women. Very famous names - Howard Hughes, Frank Sinatra, Marlon Brando, Pat DeCicco (actor & mafia man), Leopold Stokowski (famous conductor), Sidney Lumet (movie director) and Wyatt Cooper.
She has a constant need to be liked and can't leave a relationship (even abusive ones) until she has another lined up. She dives into romances head first without thought and then expects sympathy/exceptions when it inevitably goes bad. She is very much ruled by her emotions. The title "It Seemed Important at the Time" implied to me that she later realized certain things are not important. However, this is not the case. The fact that she FELT something was important in a particular moment justified all her further actions. She has temporary morals and marriages, based on her feelings at the time, hopping in and out of many beds and marriages along the way. Despite her claims about constantly learning from life, she has not learned much. She gives horrible advice throughout the book, encouraging readers to follow paths that lead to emptiness.
One thing that struck me as odd was how little she talked about her 4 children from 2 different men. She goes into detail about her trust fund and various jobs/businesses as they impacted her decisions and life. However, she doesn't mention any of the births of her children. There were only a few brief comments that referenced she had children. (Those caused me to google her and get more information. One of her sons is Anderson Cooper from CNN.) Then a story about how one son killed himself and it caused her to take a break from her current married lover for 5 months. Perhaps she is trying to maintain her children's privacy. But they didn't seem to have even been a factor as she made life decisions, such as moving in with another new man. Perhaps the focus of this book was only suppose to be romantic relationships, but it felt odd that she also talked about her various sources of income along the way and not her children. As if her children weren't essential to her life, but her money was.
She is a surprisingly good writer and comes off as likeable despite everything. She gets a lot of grace from not being explicit.
March 20, 2023
I wasn’t surprised to see negative reviews of this book by people expecting a lot of descriptive “dirt”, but I really enjoyed reading it. I felt that it was written by someone who is simply recalling how she felt at the time each of these non linear anecdotes came to her mind. These are anecdotes and small essays told by someone who had a love of life and had learned early on to look for something good in each day and had also learned to accept the uncertainties of life and what could happen when you least expect it.
I think she was a woman ahead of her time in her manner of thinking. I live in her epilogue she refers to anyone not mentioned as the Others and asks are they relieved she didn’t mention them. I did like her style of writing. While this book only gives you glimpses of her life up to the point it ends, it is still an insight not only into how she thought at each time of her life she chooses to shar, but also how she matured over time, yet still kept an optimistic outlook about her life and never gave up.
Touching was her reflections on her marriage to Wyatt Cooper (Anderson’s father). He wrote a dedication in his book “To my two families, the one that made me and the one I made.” She says, “I reread his memoir often, and although death intervened and took him from us, the memory of the life we created together with our two sons, Carter and Anderson, lives on in my secret heart, nourishing and sustaining me through the days of my life.”
Of her son Carter’s suicide she talks about grief counseling and sharing or listening in group and realizes that everyone in the world is linked in an endless chain, “including you and me, connected by an energy of compassion. So let’s be kind to each other because everyone we meet is fighting a great battle.” A little cliche? Maybe. But you have to read the whole chapter to understand why it’s so touching.
Are there any big, giant secrets and revelations about the Hollywood types she was linked to? I don’t think so, but I found it a pleasant book, easy to read, and I’m pretty sure she left out a lot of “Others.” Classy.
I think she was a woman ahead of her time in her manner of thinking. I live in her epilogue she refers to anyone not mentioned as the Others and asks are they relieved she didn’t mention them. I did like her style of writing. While this book only gives you glimpses of her life up to the point it ends, it is still an insight not only into how she thought at each time of her life she chooses to shar, but also how she matured over time, yet still kept an optimistic outlook about her life and never gave up.
Touching was her reflections on her marriage to Wyatt Cooper (Anderson’s father). He wrote a dedication in his book “To my two families, the one that made me and the one I made.” She says, “I reread his memoir often, and although death intervened and took him from us, the memory of the life we created together with our two sons, Carter and Anderson, lives on in my secret heart, nourishing and sustaining me through the days of my life.”
Of her son Carter’s suicide she talks about grief counseling and sharing or listening in group and realizes that everyone in the world is linked in an endless chain, “including you and me, connected by an energy of compassion. So let’s be kind to each other because everyone we meet is fighting a great battle.” A little cliche? Maybe. But you have to read the whole chapter to understand why it’s so touching.
Are there any big, giant secrets and revelations about the Hollywood types she was linked to? I don’t think so, but I found it a pleasant book, easy to read, and I’m pretty sure she left out a lot of “Others.” Classy.
December 6, 2019
After watching the tv movie "Little Gloria, Happy at Last" and the documentary "Nothing Left Unsaid: Gloria Vanderbilt & Anderson Cooper", I knew a good amount of information about Gloria Vanderbilt's life, so I wasn't really interested in reading her autobiography but a romance memoir sounded REALLY interesting to me, especially when names are named!
While Vanderbilt does a good job of listing some of the famous men she "dated" and married, the dirty details I was hoping for were just not there. Perhaps Vanderbilt was trying to be classy in leaving out the details, but if you're going to kiss and tell, I expect to hear some raunchy stories!
For example, it is rumored that Frank Sinatra was well hung. Ava Gardner once quipped that with 112 lb Sinatra, "12 pounds were Frank and the rest was his dick". So...WAS HE HUNG? HOW WAS HE AS A LOVER??? Well, we never really find out. Sadly, instead divulging the that kind of information, Vanderbilt talks more about how their brief fling gave her the strength to leave her (old and ugly) husband at the time, Leopold Stokowski.
Towards the last 20 pages, the book takes a more boring turn and Vanderbilt talks about how the love of her life was really...her mother? Sure, I get what she's saying about how she was always looking to replace the love she desired from her mother, but talking about your mom in your "romance memoir" just seems out of place.
There are a few juicy tidbits, like the famous "Nijinsky of cunnilingus" comment (although, spoiler, we never find out who that was), but overall, I was disappointed that she left out the dirty details I expected from a romance memoir.
While Vanderbilt does a good job of listing some of the famous men she "dated" and married, the dirty details I was hoping for were just not there. Perhaps Vanderbilt was trying to be classy in leaving out the details, but if you're going to kiss and tell, I expect to hear some raunchy stories!
For example, it is rumored that Frank Sinatra was well hung. Ava Gardner once quipped that with 112 lb Sinatra, "12 pounds were Frank and the rest was his dick". So...WAS HE HUNG? HOW WAS HE AS A LOVER??? Well, we never really find out. Sadly, instead divulging the that kind of information, Vanderbilt talks more about how their brief fling gave her the strength to leave her (old and ugly) husband at the time, Leopold Stokowski.
Towards the last 20 pages, the book takes a more boring turn and Vanderbilt talks about how the love of her life was really...her mother? Sure, I get what she's saying about how she was always looking to replace the love she desired from her mother, but talking about your mom in your "romance memoir" just seems out of place.
There are a few juicy tidbits, like the famous "Nijinsky of cunnilingus" comment (although, spoiler, we never find out who that was), but overall, I was disappointed that she left out the dirty details I expected from a romance memoir.
September 22, 2023
I remember reading fragments of this book adapted into an article for Harper's Bazaar years ago (it could’ve been Vanity Fair, not 100% sure). I was a teen, I didn't know much about Gloria Vanderbilt (though I’ve always been into old Hollywood glamuor) nor I knew much about love or sex.
But the 3-4 pages of content written by Mrs. Vanderbilt caught my attention. It was all so passionate, there was love and desire and yearning. Feeling nostalgic, I decided to read the book.
I must admit that at times this book seems vapid, the romances of a rich privileged woman might seem like that, however I liked the honest and sweet one of Gloria’s writing.
It was pleasant to see some famous names thrown around, I had already read in the Harper Bazaar’s excerpt the parts about Howard Hughes, Marlon Brando, Frank Sinatra, Truman Capote and Leopold Stokowski but it was so pleasant to find the presence of Marilyn Monroe and Katherine Hepburn! Even if it wasn’t much, they are two of my favorite old Hollywood actresses. Another interesting feature was Roald Dahl!
Overall I enjoy books where a woman can open up about her feelings, show some vulnerability and speak about all the people they’ve had feelings for- even if it was a one night stand like it happened with Marlon Brando. Gloria’s thoughts on divorce, suicide and love were interesting and honest and that’s good enough for me. Reading this book felt like seating with an elderly lady and listening to her love stories over a glass of wine or a cup of tea. You don’t judge, you don’t comment (what’s left to say anyway?); you just listen and enjoy the trip through someone else’s life and experiences.
But the 3-4 pages of content written by Mrs. Vanderbilt caught my attention. It was all so passionate, there was love and desire and yearning. Feeling nostalgic, I decided to read the book.
I must admit that at times this book seems vapid, the romances of a rich privileged woman might seem like that, however I liked the honest and sweet one of Gloria’s writing.
It was pleasant to see some famous names thrown around, I had already read in the Harper Bazaar’s excerpt the parts about Howard Hughes, Marlon Brando, Frank Sinatra, Truman Capote and Leopold Stokowski but it was so pleasant to find the presence of Marilyn Monroe and Katherine Hepburn! Even if it wasn’t much, they are two of my favorite old Hollywood actresses. Another interesting feature was Roald Dahl!
Overall I enjoy books where a woman can open up about her feelings, show some vulnerability and speak about all the people they’ve had feelings for- even if it was a one night stand like it happened with Marlon Brando. Gloria’s thoughts on divorce, suicide and love were interesting and honest and that’s good enough for me. Reading this book felt like seating with an elderly lady and listening to her love stories over a glass of wine or a cup of tea. You don’t judge, you don’t comment (what’s left to say anyway?); you just listen and enjoy the trip through someone else’s life and experiences.
June 9, 2021
Really silly fragmented and poorly written book about a sad little rich girl, neglected and unloved by her parents who was constantly seeking love throughout her life. Gloria Vanderbilt was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and really never knew what hard work and achievement was all about. Her success was do to being well connected. The men in her life seemed very dry, full of themselves and were probably selfish lovers. The only thing I found intriguing was that Howard Hughes ate steak, green peas and a baked potato every day. Although very beautiful, I don’t think Gloria was a good actress and her painting was childlike and whimsical, more on a grade school level…..again opportunity due to money and connection. She did have a good eye for design, must be a Vanderbilt thing. I did feel very sad that she lost a son, so tragic. If she had not dropped out of high school, she might have been smart enough to realize she was being swindled….glad she sued. I don’t think her “secret heart” was ever fulfilled, but rather shattered…..poor little rich girl. Wonder what the Commodore would have thought. After visiting a few of the Vanderbilt over-the-top mansions, I got interested in the family history. Now on to Fortunes Children to read about the other unfortunate ones.
July 20, 2017
I chose this book in the library yesterday because I was moved by Anderson Cooper's documentary of his mother, Gloria Vanderbilt. I found her to be a very sensitive, loving mother and I knew somewhat about the loves and losses of her long life. This book, while not exactly high literature, tickled my heart strings with a raw, simple truth about being vulnerable and human. We women love to read about other women's love interests, but knowing Gloria wrote candidly in this book about her sex life well into her 80's; well, how can one not find this charming? I especially connected with Gloria's fascination about the simple joys in daily life, for example, the dew on a fallen leaf, or the feel of weather on a long walk. As we age, wisdom gives us this appreciation, which to me, is the basis for a happy, self-fulfilled life. Having said all that, all I have left to say is: GLORIA, YOU GO GIRL!
March 14, 2022
I've been on a sort of Vanderbilt kick lately. I'm fascinated by personal histories. This particular thread started with a visit to the Biltmore in North Carolina this summer. After that, I read Anderson Cooper's history of his family, Vanderbilt: the Rise and Fall of an American Dynasty. Then, I started watching The Gilded Age. Finally, this book, which puts such a personal spin on the story of Cooper's mother, Gloria Vanderbilt. I found her so sweet, vulnerable, so longing for the love and acceptance of her mother; a woman successful in so many ways, who struggled lifelong with her family's history. I love it when one event leads to another and a more complete exploration ensues. This was a fully enjoyable journey into a foundational American family that embodied the worse of people, but also some truly wonderful personalities.
June 18, 2019
I had this book in my TBR queue for a few years then upon hearing that Gloria Vanderbilt had passed away decided it was time to read it. In it’s relatively few pages, she shares various episodes of her privileged but at times tragic life. She is candid about her lovers (some of whom she married, even more that she did not), her children and the impact of losing one son as he commits suicide in front of her. She freely admits that most of what she did and how she approached life was because of the chasm between her unavailable mother. Her 95 years as a “poor, little rich girl”, heiress, actress, writer, painter, fashion designer was a full one yet one feels that there was, even at the end, a part of her that would never be filled.
October 15, 2021
It was fascinating, after reading several books ABOUT her to read "her" in her own words. Several things that some authors made a big deal about as "influences" in Gloria V's life didn't even make the cut of mention in her own words. I did find the narrative jumped around a bit when she got to "current times", but when you live the life she did, it is somewhat hard to tell a linear story. This was the last read in my self-created series before diving in to her joint memoir with her son, Anderson Cooper, "The Rainbow Comes and Goes".
February 14, 2022
I'm not going to go into who Gloria Vanderbilt was. If one doesn't know they won't be reading this anyway. These small essays on her romances throughout her life were both honest and heart felt. None were ushy or sentimental. She maintained a cheeky sense of humor throughout. It was also apparent that having more money than God does not make one immune to heartbreak. Fun reading for a chilly winter afternoon.
August 12, 2019
Like having a fabulous conversation with your favorite aunt (over champagne I imagine), Vanderbilt is fun and warm and has lived the life. After spending the night with Brando, she is at a party kissing Gene Kelley while Lauren Bacall is singing in the next room. Wow, difficult to resist.
I read in practically one sitting.
I read in practically one sitting.
July 28, 2018
Great glimpse into an intriguing lady.
Great glimpse into an intriguing lady, who lived in very interesting times. Read after reading bios of Carol Mattheau and Oona Oniell-Chapman as well as of her mother Gloria (Morgan) Vanderbilt and her sister Thelma
Great glimpse into an intriguing lady, who lived in very interesting times. Read after reading bios of Carol Mattheau and Oona Oniell-Chapman as well as of her mother Gloria (Morgan) Vanderbilt and her sister Thelma
September 18, 2019
I imagine the Commodore would have been just as disappointed as I was. Thought I would see a woman of substance, but instead revealed one who never really overcame the rejection at her early life. Appears Gloria is truly a Vanderbilt.
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