Grandparents have changed! The stereotype of the fragile, white-haired retiree has been shattered. Today's grandparents are active and involved- in everything from careers to fitness to dating. They are thirty-something to one hundred plus- and every age in between. Grandparent's roles have also changed, as have many of their situations. While some may be grandparenting within a traditional family, others may be facing new challenges such as: acting as a stablizing force during times of family upheaval, providing day care for a grandchild, furnishing temporary living arrangements for an adult child and grandchild, filling the role of Mom and Dad for a grandchild, blending stepgrandchildren with biological grandchildren. Whatever the unique situation, parenting experts Jim Fay and Foster W Cline, M.D., show grandparents how to develop enjoyable, fulfilling relationships with both thier adult children- while helping grandchildren grow into responsible, caring young people.
I so wish I had read this book (and reread it again & again) before I became a grandmother. Great tips on how to be a consultant, not a helicopter/rescuer parent/grandparent nor a drill sergeant. Following their principles will help children and grandchildren independent, decision making, healthy and the relationships between generations satisfying.
My edition was a bit outdated with references to faxing messages, using camcorders, with nothing about the challenges of the internet & cell phones. But the ideas are still applicable & relevant. The challenge will be in implementing them consistently in my relationships.
Great read for all grandparents!!!
From the book: The Three Rs: Drill Sergeant/Helicopter Behavior to Avoid 1. Ranting created hard feelings 2. Raving removes people from real issues 3. Rescuing puts off decision-making
Two Cs and Two Es Consultant Behavior to Remember 1. Choices encourage decision-making 2. Consequences teach necessary lessons
Underlying all of Love and Logic are two essential messages: 1. I love you, and I hope your life goes well. 2. You are the kind of person who can learn from your mistakes. You are bright enough to learn and strong enough to handle the pain that comes from unwise choices you've made.
When in doubt pick up a book with ideas and reinforcers to a time past raising your own - choices you can live with is the answer to parenting, grand parenting...reminders on how to relate to little people...
There was lots of sound advice for any relationship including grandchildren in this book. It was thought provoking regarding the many different situations grandparents find themselves in. Organizations that support grandparents were also discussed.
I thought this version of Love and Logic was a lot better than the earlier, basic Love and Logic. It was updated to the 21st century and had some good ideas about grandparenting, and parenting adult children.