The Art of Hating

by Gerald Schoenewolf

"The world is full of hate but few people know how to hate well". So begins Gerald Schoenewolf's study of hate. His main argument is that most people hate in destructive ways. As individuals we routinely act out hateful feelings - from jealousy to loathing to bitterness to contempt to disgust to irritation to rage - with hardly a backward glance. We are concerned with the immediate need to protect ourselves, or to get and create a climate of animosity and distrust. To hate well, we must be able to distinguish between our objective and subjective hate, willing to risk verbalizing the objective hate and determined to ride out the consequences of verbalizing it. This book explores the many ways people express subjective hate - including characterological, perverse, cultural, political, sexual and parent-child hate. It provides a history of the development of the art of hating in the psychotherapeutic laboratory, and then a chapter on the "art of hating in everyday life". In a final chapter, "The Future of Hate", Schoenewolf confesses that this book is itself an expression of hate - objective hate - which he hopes will move readers to become more aware of how their subjective hate impedes them, It is written without psychoanalytic jargon and aims to be of interest to both professionals and lay people.

Genres: Nonfiction

224 pages, Hardcover

First published November 1, 1990

About the author

Gerald Schoenewolf is a licensed psychoanalyst and professor of psychology. He is the author of 22 books, most of which are about clinical psychology and psychotherapy. He has also written six novels, a poetic translation of Chinese Daoist philosophy and an illustrated book of poetry, HOLDING ON AND LETTING GO (revised in 2020). He has also written 20 screenplays and written, directed and produced two feature films. Five of his screenplays have won awards at festivals. He lives with his wife, Julia and his parrot and two cats in the mountains of Pennsylvania.

Reviews

[Julia Alberino · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's hard to rate a book like this. I was assigned certain chapters as part of a class, and was interested enough to read the rest of the book after the course ended. Some of the material is outdates; other material seems the author's highly subjective thoughts. The reader (or at least I) will be alternately angry and pessimistic and then clam and optimistic. At the very end, the author admits to having intentionally been provocative in the hope of causing the type of "anger that precedes growth." In that I feel he succeeded.

[Elena Hexthorn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Understanding inherently why people hate each other is the key to being free from this negative emotion. This is a really well thought out book. It was an unusual choice when I bought it, opting to try a new shelf in a favourite bookshop. I was glad I read it 20 years ago, and I think I will read it again.

[Muhammad Zaman · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Art of Hating is a thought-provoking book that offers a comprehensive exploration of the nature, origins and types of hate. It challenges readers to think deeply about this complex emotion and provides valuable insights into how we can not only overcome it, can use positively in our professional as well as daily life.