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The Pile of Stuff at the Bottom of the Stairs

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Mary Gilmour feels as though her life is going down a plug hole clogged with cornflakes and Play-Doh. Her job is part time but housework is full time, and she has no time at all for her two young sons. Mary is convinced that there is only one thing standing between her and organised contentment: his name is Joel and she's married to him.

404 pages, Hardcover

First published March 1, 2011

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Christina Hopkinson

10 books11 followers

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5 stars
99 (8%)
4 stars
272 (24%)
3 stars
430 (38%)
2 stars
207 (18%)
1 star
112 (10%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 162 reviews
Profile Image for Anne.
2,438 reviews1,170 followers
November 26, 2010
Christina Hopkinson's novel is a wry look at modern-day marriage, totally honest, often funny and at times, alarmingly familiar. All too often it is the tiny irritations in life that make the most impact on how we are feeling; the wet towels left on the floor, the piles of loose change and crumpled tissues on the kitchen table, and yes, the pile of stuff at the bottom of the stairs. Mary decides she has had enough of Joel's laziness and compiles a complicated list that has debits and credits according to his behaviour - if he goes over his allocated credits, then she is thinking about divorce. Only Joel has no idea that the list exists.

At times I got incredibly irritated by Mary's whinges, on the face of it she has a pretty nice life, with a handsome husband, two beautiful children, a part time job that she loves and good friends. I began to ask myself what was the point of all of this. There were other times when I found myself nodding in agreement when she described Joel's annoying habits, but other times I was envious of her, and wishing I had a husband who could rustle up a fabulous meal at the drop of a hat - even if it did mean that he used every pan in the house.

This is a funny read that at times deals with some serious subjects. Mary's friend Mitzi and her husband Michael are two obnoxious characters who take a starring role towards the end of the book, even if it's a toe-curlingly embarrassing scene to read!

An easy read, that doesnt take long and looks at the everyday stresses and strains of life in a humorous and touching way.
Profile Image for Kate.
16 reviews1 follower
May 5, 2011
Had to read for bookclub. Would never have got past the first 50 pages if I didn't have to read it. It was a great idea, but far too negative and was trying to be funny, but did not pull it off.
Profile Image for Amanda Wigfall.
21 reviews1 follower
April 2, 2019
I'm confused after reading the other reviews of this book - I loved it! It was a random pickup from the library and a great one at that.

The book focuses on the dissatisfaction the main character - Mary - has around her life after having children. She now has to work part-time, pay for the childcare out of her reduced salary, is considered a slacker at work because of her part-time status, and her time off is taken for granted by her admittedly, lovely, husband, as time for her to run errands for him. Her household has gone from one of equality to a traditional (read: pre-1960s women = housewife) one.

Anyways, back to the review. The author truly brought these characters to life. After only reading a few chapters I was irritated for Mary and the indignities she was suffering. She also seemed like a credible witness, not one who would spin a situation for her own benefit or ignore contradictory evidence. Even the tertiary characters were brought alive, and I really appreciated it.

Along with the characters, the story felt real. In some cases, closure was not offered, because, hey, it isn't always there in real life. The characters make some crap decisions, but that didn't make them bad people.

I look forward to reading more by Christina Hopkinson.
Profile Image for Laura Armstrong.
164 reviews36 followers
June 5, 2011
I was pleasantly surprised by this book. Disenchanted Mary decides to create a list of all the things that her husband does to annoy/confirm her suspions that a divorce maybe an option - for six months....Sounds a bit formulaic but Hopkinson writes in a witty and knowing style that mother's/wives will relate to. Family life and all its trials and tribulations are bought to thoughtful and comedic life. 7/10
Profile Image for Jane.
177 reviews6 followers
April 5, 2018
Ok, I am going to be brave and give this book 4 stars even though it is kinda embarrassing that I liked it so much. I am not sure why all the bad reviews. The premise could really rankle with some people (it is a terrible way to treat your partner) but, for its genre, I thought it was well written and I enjoyed reading on holiday. It also addressed some pretty important issues around bearing the load at home and the invisible work of mothers.
Profile Image for James Stewart.
2 reviews7 followers
March 5, 2011
"But you are not the only one, as there are some standard habits men have that annoy women to the core. Christina Hopkinson, author of the book 'The Pile Of Stuff At The Bottom Of The Stairs', tells you the top ten things that women hate about men, reports the Daily Mail.

This is a very funny, piercingly clever book, which is difficult to put down (does anyone else recognize the authors husband, my good friend the leading divorce lawyer and self proclaimed "modern man", Alex Carruthers?). Too many of us will recognize ourselves (our our other half's!) in this brilliant tome, and will ask the question - what do we most hate about the one we love? Challenging but very rewarding - buy it!"
Profile Image for Jonkers Jonkers.
Author 7 books6 followers
June 2, 2017
I realised when I read the blurb that this book's humour was going to be mainly about the failings of husbands which was more likely to appeal to women. I still thought I'd give it a go and there were some amusing moments and some truths although the main protagonist came across as a constant moaner and the main idea of keeping a list of the husband's misdemeanours gradually become annoying and repetitive. If you have an annoying husband, you will probably think she is just lucky. We realise that very early on. Ms Hopkinson throws in a few crude/mildly shocking moments seemingly in an attempt to get the reader re-focused. It doesn't work. Ok, but no more than that.
Profile Image for Sammy.
1,898 reviews18 followers
March 26, 2024
1.5 rounded up.

I was drawn by the initial idea behind this, because honestly it describes my life so perfectly (only my husband is about 100x worse!). Dealing with being surrounded by mess and dirt constantly, no matter how hard you work to try and keep up with it is exhausting. And depressing. To the point where you don't feel comfortable in your own home and would rather be anywhere else even.
But in actuality, it didn't work at all. The idea of the list was entertaining as a thought, but in practice the amount of effort and time wasted on this, coupled with the whole arbitrary nature of the numbers chosen was just... wrong. Especially as she never actually sat down and talked about it with her husband first. Granted, IRL you could talk until you were blue in the face, but things would only change for a week or so until nature re-asserted itself, but you still try before putting someone on trial, right?
Honestly, it's simple. Is living with the mess better than living without the person, yes or no? Ok, so the MC got to that by the end of the book, but everything in between was just a waste of time and energy (and paper), and made the MC come across as particularly unlikable. As are all the other characters in this book.

I'm giving it the extra half a star for at least trying to tackle the topic, but in all this didn't work for me.
Profile Image for Traci.
1,099 reviews44 followers
May 29, 2018
I really enjoyed this one! I was sort of surprised how much I liked it, given that it's about the age-old issue of how does the housework/child-rearing get split up between the adults. Mary works part-time and does the majority of the housework along with caring for the two sons she has with her husband, Joel. She's grown more and more irritated, frustrated, and ultimately angry, about how he doesn't seem to pull his weight in those areas, most likely since he works full-time. She begins The List, an Excel spreadsheet of all his faults, what he does and doesn't do around the house/for their sons, adding and subtracting out points for successes and failures. If Joel gets to zero points or less, that tells her what she needs to know - that he doesn't care - and what her next move is.

The book works because anyone who has ever lived with another person feels Mary's pain, children or no. My position is flipped a bit, as I'm the one working full-time, and my husband is home the majority of the time. And yes, when you feel like you're expected to do everything simply because you're female (or the one not working, or whatever), it does begin to breed resentment. It's called not appreciating your partner, and it happens every day. Should the person that's home more do more of the housework? Probably. But that doesn't mean that the person working full-time should automatically expect the homemaker to do it all the time...and it definitely doesn't mean the other person shouldn't ever say thank you! Do I wish my husband noticed our bathroom could use a good cleaning long before I do? Sure! Do I feel like he's a complete useless waste of space because he doesn't? Absolutely not - because he does a lot of other things for me, like have dinner ready every night when I come home.

Basically, don't take your partner/spouse for granted, and TALK to each other!
Profile Image for Ellie.
344 reviews6 followers
June 1, 2013
I'm not sure what persuaded me to hang in there with this ultimately disappointing book. The protagonist seems a rather unlikable character, convinced that hers is the only view that's right, and apparently completely unable to realise that a) most of us on average incomes always think everyone else has a life so much better than our own b) that talking solves so much more than producing Excel spreadsheets (outside of the workplace, at least) and c) that she is obsessed to the point of OCD about cleaning and should probably seek medical help.

The basic premise of the book is that Mary is dissatisfied with the contribution that her husband Joel makes to the domestic chores, while everyone else tells her how wonderful he is and how she's so lucky to have him. So she draws up The List, a spreadsheet she uses to calculate the number of misdemeanours committed by her husband, allowing him a net 100 breaches in 6 months, and intending to raise the suggestion of divorce if he exceeds that target. Of course, things don't go according to her plan.

I'm not sure if this book is meant to illustrate that no-one sees their own life as perfect, or if it is meant to be some kind of feminist mantra that men should do more around the house. Either way, by presenting only the view of one rather anally retentive person, it fails. I can't help thinking it would have been better if we'd been able to see events from not just Mary's perspective, but Joel's as well. It seems obvious to me, as the reader, that Mary has many habits and expectations that could be considered highly irritating, but we don't get to explore that.
Profile Image for Tanya.
858 reviews20 followers
March 24, 2012
Goodness ~ it started off hilarious and was very entertaining, a lot of the passages close to home and others a bit overdrawn. Once I finally got to the middle of the book, in hopes that Mary would get a grip and instead of complain, complain, make her lists of negativity and DO something, it just lagged further and frankly, was a bore to the very end. The couple, Mary and Joel, had many issues but then so do all marriages - that causes them to fall into bad habits that perhaps were always at the surface but grew to irritation over the years.

I try and grab a character to latch on to in a book, at least one!, but in this book there wasn't a soul who made me want to go for a cuppa. Mary was SO annoying - I wanted to tell her to get out of the house for a few hours, a weekend to recharge. We, mothers, all need that! Joel wasn't a big prize but he was for Mary and I think the two of them fell deep into that marriage trap of bitterness where what you actually like/love about your soulmate is hard to put down on paper until it's too late.
Profile Image for Sibyl.
111 reviews
May 4, 2013
This isn't a terrible book: it's just essentially rather dull. The messages of the novel seem to be 1) being a parent is hard work. 2) Each partner in a marriage tends to think, feel and behave differently from the other. 3) Housework is tedious and women often end up doing more of it.

Fortunately 4) A little belated rationality/courtesy/tolerance means that most of us should be able to live more or less happily ever after, whilst counting our blessings.

Most of these 'truths' could be found in any old woman's magazine on a waiting room table.

The plot is dressed up with a couple of steamy(ish) sex scenes, one involving accidental voyeurism, and another the near-seduction of the heroine by a female friend of a friend. There is also the fragile skeleton of a plot that revolves around the heroine's list-making habits.

But a book that I'd hoped might be funny and original and insightful was just rather banal. I got through it, because I wanted something fairly undemanding - but felt resentful because I'd anticipated something a lot more sharply plotted.

Profile Image for Jeanne.
976 reviews21 followers
June 18, 2011
There is a pile of stuff at the bottom of the stairs, and it irritates the heck out of Mary Gilmour. Her husband, Joel, ignores the pile and climbs right over it. And adds to it daily! For Mary, the piles and messes in her home have become overwhelming. So overwhelming that she’s actually considering divorcing Joel.

Then she has an idea: the list. Mary creates a list of all of Joel’s housework transgressions. By documenting all of his domestic don’ts, Mary seeks some clarity. What she achieves with her list is completely different.

Mary is a whiner, and the first third of the novel is difficult to read just because of that negativity. But the story progresses, humor surfaces, and Mary makes some important discoveries about herself and the seemingly flawless domestic diva with whom she is friends.
Profile Image for Bethany H..
47 reviews2 followers
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July 25, 2011
I was glad to see that I could review this book without giving it a star rating. My personal rating would be only one or two stars, and that's really not fair to the book. It's an interesting, fairly well-written women's fiction book, and I can't blame the author for my total lack of interest in it. I kept reading, though, clear through to the end, mostly because the characters were (with a few notable exceptions) realistic and compelling.

My issue actually lays in the book's realism. Realism can be a wee bit boring when it centers around a quiet little marriage issue, if not portrayed with panache. The humor did not quite hit panache level for me. And then there were jarring moments (particularly towards the end) that seemed absolutely divorced from reality. Overall, it didn't work for me, but it could work for you.
522 reviews34 followers
August 8, 2011
Mary and Joel have two young boys, both are employed - she is part-time at four days per week but still responds to e-mails & phone calls on her 'day off'. And they have a house Mary feels is never tidy and Joel believes is comfortable.

Sounds like your typical marriage, doesn't it? But Mary is fed up with doing everything while her husband walks away and ignores messes he or the kids have created. Still kinda typical. Then Mary decides to make a list and tally Joel's credits & debits. In great detail. For six months. And then decide what to do about what she is sure will prove she is pulling 98% of the load. Mary is a very angry person.

The story is entertaining, it just felt a little extreme or something.

The writing style makes for an enjoyable read. I look forward to reading more of her work.
Profile Image for Lisa.
148 reviews
September 5, 2011
The book started well enough but then seemed to be a constant moan about everything most of us find annoying enough about husbands without having to be reminded of it! I didn't particularly 'like' any of the characters, apart from Becky, and felt more emotional displacement rather than empathy by the middle of the book.
It didn't really live up to the blurb, and as a friend said, the idea was perhaps better than the resulting book, but the surprisingly decent ending raised it from a 2 to a 2.5.
Profile Image for Helen.
103 reviews1 follower
December 16, 2014
I was really disappointed with this book. I had high hopes for it as the idea was such a good one. It could have been done in a really funny, relatable way but unfortunately I just didn't connect with the main character at all.

I read probably just under a half of this book and then skipped to the end to try and get it over with - the negativity and constant unsatisfaction with everyone and everything just got to me. Nothing was good enough for Mary and I'm afraid I didn't find any humour in her complaints.

Not for me, sorry.

Profile Image for Laurie.
306 reviews
August 10, 2012


When I read the fly leaf on this book I thought, "This is me!" but it isn't. This book is about a neurotic woman who can't concentrate on a tv program because there's a puzzle piece in the corner. I would like some help around the house but by page 10 I was sick of this crazy woman myself. She aggravated me so much that I stopped reading and don't intend to finish. So much could be done with this theme but for me this book completely misses the mark. I wanted humor, not aggravation.
Profile Image for Shirley.
62 reviews
October 6, 2012
Always a challenge to understand Brit-centric books but the story was one I could follow...I could totally relate to the protagonist's role as the shaper of home and life for the household but not really for herself. In fact, it was intriguing to find out if there is a solution or at the very least what solution she came up with. Chacracters are well drawn and you find yourself feeling with them...for them...against them. Very interesting observations on an age old problem. Engaging read!
Profile Image for Milly.
125 reviews7 followers
April 18, 2011
I found that every time i put the book down, i always forgot the main character's name, untill like 80% through when I finally remembered it.

Good book, kinda funny, I kept thinking it was a bio. Didnt really get moving or shaking till the last 100 pages
168 reviews2 followers
August 15, 2012
I like to read a variety of books on holiday - this was the funny one. At times I giggled out loud. A good lesson in focusing on what's important and dealing with things rather than hanging onto irritations. I've decided my husband's worth sticking with!!
43 reviews2 followers
February 6, 2012
Reasonably amusing chick lit (does middle-aged still count at chick lit?) that covers how annoying spouses can be if we dwell incessently on their faults and small children are involved.
Profile Image for Carous.
550 reviews19 followers
October 21, 2020
Ultimamente tenho curtido mais livros que mostram uma vida não tão cor de rosa do que outra coisa. O lugar da bagunça mostra sem papas na língua o que é preciso para um casamento dar certo, mas que também não é porque a vida não é um conto de fadas que acaba no final feliz para sempre que não há solução a não ser aceitar os problemas e decepções.

Confesso que na metade do livro já odiava Joel num grau que achei que não teria volta, e ele não parecia melhorar como marido e pai de jeito nenhum. Estava decepcionada achando que namorar é bom, mas casar é uma droga porque o encanto quebra e nos vemos presa numa circunstância muito mais complicada que abandonar que um namoro. É uma pena que homens tenham que ter aulas para saber como ser um marido decente e um pai prestativo enquanto da mulher é cobrado que seja perfeita em todos os sentidos desde que somos pequenas.

Não que Mary seja uma personagem que defenderei com unhas e dentes. Ou qualquer personagem feminina. São reais, têm seus defeitos, mas achei que a autora prestou um desserviço denominando algumas dali feministas quando elas não passavam de mulheres olhando pro próprio umbigo. E nesse sentido, nem no final do livro houve redenção - principalmente da sogra da Mary. Mulher desagradável.

Mas fiquei danada da vida mesmo a) com a falta de apoio que a Mary recebeu das amigas, principalmente da Becky que cobrava atenção e compreensão da amiga, mas não retribuia. Sequer confortava Mary, só a fazia se sentir pior.

Felizmente no final tudo se resolve. E até que a resolução não ficou muito distante de um conto de fadas, ficou melhor porque é possível alcançá-lo.
Profile Image for B.S. Casey.
Author 3 books33 followers
September 13, 2017
Great book for some easy reading. There wasn't much in the way of plot or much character development, but it was still pretty good.

Funny, not a lot of characters and twists to remember, and relatable to anybody who has ever gone through indecision about a relationship.

The plot is simple and easy to understand: Mary uses her methodical nature to in effect make a detailed pros and cons list of all the things her husband has done, before he finds it and starts adding things himself. She finally realises nobody is perfect and there has to be give and take in a relationship.

Lighthearted, easy reading :)
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Lauren.
498 reviews4 followers
August 26, 2018
I picked this book up for a £1 in Poundland as an emergency book read so didn't know much about the plot or the author.

The story premise was an interesting one, an insight into family life and how obstacles and challenges you face are actually the mundane reality of life with working parents and young children.

I liked the story but nothing actually really happened. No big plot twists or surprises but that was fine as it provides a true reflection of most people's lives. I was surprised at the easy resolution at the end after both Mary and Joel admit to mistakes
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
252 reviews3 followers
September 16, 2017
First book I read by Ms. Hopkinson. Recommended by a friend I started reading with high hopes for a good story. Instead it appeared to be very boring. Woman making a list of things her husband did wrong, giving him points for things doing wrong or not doing things she was expecting him to do.
Giving him points for things he did right. An excel sheet of events. The interesting part was solely about their strange friends and colleagues.
Profile Image for Ceri.
557 reviews6 followers
June 17, 2024
I found myself in a bit of a reading slump after finishing a very heavy and intense book so wanted something funny and lighthearted. I picked this up thinking it would tick both boxes but actually found it to be a complete drag.
It started off fairly funny and I could identify with some of the niggles the main character faced. However, the plot became farcical and I really had to drag myself through this.
Profile Image for Sandi.
329 reviews1 follower
October 24, 2017
I nevernever do this, but I finally gave up (before I even hit page 100) and skipped to the end. This book was rather boring and all about man-bashing. Not that I haven't done my share over the years, but this took it to a whole other level. A whole book about how a man cannot do anything right? Wow.
Profile Image for Kathleen McRae.
1,640 reviews7 followers
July 7, 2020
This book is really rather clever.It goes deep inside Mary's view of her relationship and her dissection of her husband's behavior but she does not do any type of self analysis. She is taking an OCD approach to irritants and her communication is only with herself. I have a feeling this is the station platform many relationships get stuck at and are unable to get past
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