Inauguration Day 1989: President-elect Tucker's limousine pulls up at the White House to escort President Reagan to the ceremonies. But what greets the incoming president is his first situation of "extreme criticality": Reagan is still in his pajamas. His back is bothering him. He's tired. He just doesn't feel like moving today. In fact, he doesn't; think he'll want to move until spring...So begins Thomas Nelson Tucker's Presidency. And so begins this riotously funny addition to the long line of White House memoirs written by everyone from the jantitor to the head of the Security council in every administration we care of dare to remember. This blow-by-blow of the presidency of Thomas Nelson Tucker (a.k.a. TNT) is told by one Herbert Wadlough, personal Assistant to the President and Deputy Chier of Staff (not to mention former employee of the Boise, Idaho accounting firm of Dewey, Skuem, and Howe), whose domain within the White House is its mess-by which is meant its kitchen...at least for the moment. Because President Tucker (once he's able to rout Reagan) is headed for the history books for all the wrong reasons.
Among the ruffled feathers in Tucker's cap that Wadlough apprises us of : Operation Open Door, through which the President has the chance to meet the dirt-under-the-fingernails ordinary people (though some have rather extraordinary habits)...the Citadel incident in which the presidential bomb shelter malfunctions, with dire (and clausterphobic) consequences for Chancellor Schmeer of Germany...the summit meeting with Castro, who, more than anything is thrilled to meet the First Lady (a former almost-soft-porn star): he's seen all her movies.And those are only a few of the highlights. Herb Wadouht also keeps us abreast of he smaller, more intimate moment that make up ths Presidency: bizarre religious conversations in TNT;s family...the unnerving manifestations of Vice President "Bingo" Reigeluth's lack of concern for the Pesident's safety...the continual battles among the White House staff for precious access to the President-who's got it, who hasn't, how Herb himself loses it several times, and how he regains it permanently while slipping down the face of a rock on an island off the coast of Maine...And finally, Herb gives us the unexpurgated lowdown on BUPI, the revolutionary party of Bermuda, whose attemped takeover of the U.S. military base there (they've already captured all the golf courses, hotels, and sweater factories) triggers Presdient Tucker's most amazing idea..The scenes of TNT's reign unroll, and with them an unrelenting parade of catastrophes, calamitous coincidences, disaterous faux pas, monumental incompetence, and all manner of bad luck and worse planning. But our intrepid narrator (bouyed by his wife Joan's constant injections of meat loaf and solicitude never let's his emotions get the best of him ("Things Sticky", he writes in his diary when the U.S. negotioator in Bermuda crisis is kidnapped), as we are treated to his deadpan desciptions and hysterically level-headed interpretations of the truly inspired-nonpartisan- hilarity that constitutes this particualar White House Mess.