Memories Are Made of This: Dean Martin Through His Daughter's Eyes

by Deana Martin, Jerry Lewis (Foreword), Wendy Holden (Contributor)

I loved being called Deana Martin. Even when I was very small. Dad was such a positive influence on people’s lives that to be so closely associated with him was always a blessing. People can’t help but smile when they think of my father, which has to be the greatest legacy of all. When people hear my name for the first time, they usually ask the same question: “Any relation?” “Yes,” I reply proudly, “he’s my father.” They smile and cry, “Oh, I love your father! I’ve loved him all my life.” Sometimes, just sometimes, they ask me the most important question of all: “Was he a good father?” To their surprise, I shake my head and smile. “No,” I reply. “He wasn’t a good father, but he was a good man.” Where Dad came from, that meant a great deal more.

So begins Deana Martin’s captivating and heartfelt memoir of her father, the son of an Italian immigrant from modest beginnings who worked his way to the top of the Hollywood firmament to become one of the greatest stars of all time.

Charming, debonair, and impeccably attired in a black tuxedo, Dean Martin was coolness incarnate. His music provided the soundtrack of romance, and his image captivated movie and television audiences for more than fifty years. His daughter Deana was among his most devoted fans, but she also knew a side of him that few others ever glimpsed.

In page-turning prose, Deana recalls her early childhood, when she and her siblings were left in the erratic care of Dean’s loving but alcoholic first wife. She chronicles the constantly changing blended family that marked her youth, along with the unexpected moments of silliness and tenderness that this unusual Hollywood family shared. Deana candidly reveals the impact of Dean’s fame and characteristic aloofness on her efforts to forge her own identity, but delights in sharing wonderful, never-before-told stories about her father and his pallies known as the Rat Pack. It may not have been a normal childhood, but Deana’s enchanting account of life as the daughter of one of Hollywood’s sexiest icons will leave you entertained, delighted, and nostalgic for a time gone by.

Genres: Biography, Nonfiction, Memoir, Music, Biography Memoir, Humor, Autobiography

297 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2004

Reviews

[Debbie Zapata · Rating 2 out of 5]

Apr 24, 330am ~~ Review asap.

1140am ~~ Welcome To My World by Dean Martin https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrsyb...

His voice made me swoon years before I understood what swooning was! lol

I was expecting to enjoy this book more than I did. The basic facts about Dean were all new to me. In all my 63 years I only ever knew his voice, some of his movies, and his television show, which my family gathered around to watch every week.

But I never knew a thing about the man himself. So I was amazed to learn that his real name was Dino, that was not just a nickname people used. English was his second language, and he was a cool dude before anyone else understood what that meant.

He was also a person who preferred to be alone, was a practical joker, tested his comedy routines on his family around the dinner table, needed to live by a strict schedule, and according to wives and this particular daughter (the author) was very stingy with his emotions and time towards people, even while being generous in other ways. A complex person who preferred not to share much of himself unless it was on stage, on screen, or on the golf course.

I was not disappointed to learn these things about my forever heartthrob, but I was turned off by the tone the author took throughout the book. She never really knew her father until she was nine years old. Her parents split up when Deana Martin was just one year old. Her mother had some major problems with drinking and finances, even after her huge divorce settlement. The kids were not in a good environment: she would take them to bars and parties, and there apparently was no type of what most of us would call a normal life.

But when Deana was nine her aunt took the kids and left them at Dean's house and from then on he and his new wife Jeanne raised them along with their own two children. Seven altogether, and suddenly Deana and her four siblings were living in high style materially.

Deana says more than once that she was not angry about her father not being around during her earliest years, but then she will make a snide comment or two about how she missed him. And later she was cruel to him. Knowing he hated to be kept waiting and never went clothes shopping, she insisted once that he buy her a leather coat from some fancy shop and that he go with her to help pick which one she should get. Knowing that he hated it, knowing that he was uncomfortable, she just did it so she could say he spent time with her. The event, as described in a few very uncomfortable pages, sounds like it was a nightmare for both of them.

I got tired of the name dropping (I dated this one and that one; so and so sang at my birthday party, etc) and tired of the many times Deana put her father on the spot in order for her to get things from him. That coat, a car, another car later that she forced him into buying for her and then got mad when his management people sent her the bill for it. She sent the car back, choosing to refuse seeing the lesson she should have learned. He gave her a start, but it seemed to me she just kept using him. Subconscious revenge, maybe?

Other reviewers have mentioned her whining, so I am not the only one to notice it. Dean was obviously a complex person, as most creative people are. I never knew just how complex he was, and of course would not understand the results of living with such a person. Maybe I would have been whiny too, who knows. But the tone of the book turned my stomach and I won't be keeping it.

But let's finish this review with something pretty. Here is another of my favorite Dean Martin songs.
In The Chapel In The Moonlight https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZzpI...

[GoldGato · Rating 2 out of 5]

It's always interesting to read about a subject via their relatives or friends, and this book is a different look at Dino from one of his daughters.

Unlike his son's book, which seemed more of a whitewash, Deanna's book brings a decidedly personal view. The reader ends up getting her main point, which is that she was the middle child in a huge family and was overlooked by her famous father. However, some of her writing comes across as very whiny, reflecting more of a spoiled child. She also is very pro-family, so that any deviation from that path, whether it's her stepmother slighting Deanna's child or Dino not being there AT ALL TIMES for Deanna's cherished son, is noted...over and over. Yet, she basically trivializes her real mother, and when she writes about finding out that her mother died in her sleep while living above a bar in San Francisco, there doesn't seem much love. Deanna discovers her mother had built a large library of books in her apartment, but the books are then given away. Gee. Such familial love.

If you don't mind the complaints about money from a child of one of the richest celebrities of all time, it's not a bad book. The world's coolest dude worked his toosh off, so his kids could live the good life. I always wondered why Dino The Cool suddenly took a different path from the '70s onward, and after reading about his family, I can understand his need for peace and quiet.

Book Season = Summer (rough life)

[Joy H. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Added 3/21/15. (The book was published in 2004.)
I read this book in March 2015. In this book, Deana Martin relates her memories of her father, Dean Martin (singer & actor). I never realized he was in so many movies and was praised for his acting in serious films. I always remember him as a singer and part of the Rat Pack with Frank Sinatra.

Deana tells about the negative effect which the problem of their broken family had on her life and especially on the life of Dean Martin's first wife, Betty. It's a sad story. (Dean Martin left Betty to marry Jeanne.) In a way, I wish I hadn't known about Dean Martin's life behind the scenes. I would like to have remembered him as the cheery fellow we are all familiar with from his career as a big star.

PS-There is supposed to be a film being adapted from this book. See the following links:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1504020/?...
http://www.adweek.com/fishbowlny/dean...
"Ten years after Deana Martin released Memories Are Made of This, her memoir about growing up with a famous father, the New York Times bestseller is inching closer to a movie adaptation. She is to be played by Jennifer Love Hewitt..."
I wonder who will be cast as Dean Martin. It will be hard to find someone who can duplicate his charm.

PPS-I will never forget the wonderful TV variety shows in which Dean Martin starred. I always looked forward to them. They say he hated rehearsing and did very little of it. So his show had a very spontaneous atmosphere. It was always great fun, full of music and laughter.

[La Crosse County Library · Rating 4 out of 5]

Review originally published March 2006

“Memories Are Made of This.” Wouldn’t that make a nice name for a song? Well, actually it is a song title familiar to many people. It was the first number one hit for movie actor, television star, and singer Dean Martin.

I recently read Memories Are Made of This, written by Deana Martin. The cover of this memoir says “Dean Martin through his daughter’s eyes.” Deana was named for him and is the fourth of his seven children.

This is a revealing book about a public man who was very private and didn’t let many people truly know him. He wasn’t understood, but he was loved by the world. And even though Dean Martin has been gone for many years, he still has fans who range in age from their teens to their nineties, and are of all races and nationalities.

Jerry Lewis wrote the forward for this book and it is sincere and touching. Dean Martin was a big part of his life and Jerry has never hidden his admiration and tremendous affection for his “hero,” even when they were estranged.

Deana Martin wrote this book after she became a grandmother and was a senior citizen. But it seems, at times, that she is remembering things that are still very fresh in her mind. Her father was one of the most successful entertainers of his time, but life wasn’t always peaches and cream for him or his family.

She says she wrote this candid chronicle to “set the record straight” for the first time. Deana Martin mentions that she is frequently asked if Dean was a good father. She said she always replies, “No. He wasn’t a good father but he was a good man.”

The book contains many funny anecdotes including the time one of Deana’s brothers set up a little table at the end of the driveway with household things for sale, because it was on the movie star bus route for tourists. The buses rolled past the Martin house every fifteen minutes and he sold cans of peas, toilet paper, and anything else he could steal from the pantry. A twenty-five-cent can of vegetables could go for as much as five dollars.

Though most people thought Dean Martin was a party animal, he really wasn’t most of the time. When there was a party going on at his house and he got tired, Dean would go to his bedroom and call the police anonymously with a noise complaint. The officers would come to the house and tell everyone to go home and Dean got to bed at a decent hour. The book also delves into the sadder times, telling about the death of Dean’s beloved son in an airplane accident and the turmoil his life became after he married his third wife.

This is a well written book that includes many Martin family pictures and worth the time to read if you are interested in an in-depth view of the life of this famous entertainer from his daughter’s perspective.

“Sweet, sweet memories you gave to me. You can’t beat the memories you gave to me.”

“Memories Are Made Of This.”*

*Music & lyrics by Terry Gilkyson, Rich Dehr, and Frank Miller. Copyright 1955, Blackwood Music, Inc.

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[Sean Peters (A Good Thriller) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Deana Martin has written a moving, often surprising portrait of an icon, as seen through the eyes of his loving daughter.So begins Deana Martin's captivating and heartfelt memoir of her father, the son of an Italian immigrant from modest beginnings who worked his way to the top of the Hollywood firmament to become one of the greatest stars of all time. Charming, debonair, and impeccably attired in a black tuxedo, Dean Martin was coolness incarnate. His music provided the soundtrack of romance, and his image captivated movie and television audiences for more than fifty years. His daughter Deana was among his most devoted fans, but she also knew a side of him that few others ever glimpsed. In this heartfelt memoir, Deana recalls the constantly changing blended family that marked her youth, along with the unexpected moments of silliness and tenderness that this unusual Hollywood family shared. She candidly reveals the impact of Dean’s fame and characteristic aloofness, but delights in sharing wonderful, never-before-told stories about her father and his pallies known as the Rat Pack. This enchanting account of life as the daughter of one of Hollywood’s sexiest icons will leave you entertained, delighted, and nostalgic for a time gone by.From Publishers Weekly:In this evenhanded biography of her famous father, Deana Martin acknowledges that Dean "wasn't a good father, but he was a good man." The youngest child of four from Dean Martin's marriage to his first wife, Betty MacDonald, the author recalls how her mother began drinking so heavily that Dean's new wife, Jeanne Biegger, eventually took Betty's three girls in (Betty's son was living with his grandparents) and brought them up along with the three children she had with Dean. Martin details her father's life from his teenage years as a card dealer to his first Atlantic City gig with Jerry Lewis, offering her own observations along the way ("A glass of apple juice masquerading as scotch in his hand, he perfected a role that was going to become... indistinguishable from the real Dean Martin"). Perhaps Martin forgives her emotionally detached father too quickly, as when he doesn't show up at her first live theatre performance ("I guess Dad felt that with so many children, if he did it for one, he would have spent his whole life doing it for the others"). But in the end, hers is a heartfelt and honest portrait of a mysterious father. With Wendy Holden's help, the daughter of one of the most successful mid-twentieth-century entertainers makes quite a treat of her account of growing up chaotically amid A-list celebs. Of her father, his feminine namesake (her name rhymes with the queen of the jungle's) says that he wasn't a good father, but he was a good man. He left her and her siblings with his mentally deteriorating first wife, and after she abandoned them and the family, they were raised by Dean Martins second wife.

Overall a well documentated story, shocking at times , very sad at times, very touching at times. maybe tough at times to have a father so busy had no time for his children, he cared, but would prefer to be on the gold course and leave all the business to his staff.

Yes a good man, a great performer, singer, Las Vegas act, television star but maybe not a good father.

Heart breaking last year or two with his health and Frank Sinatra's health as well.

The end of a great era of the Rat pack.

4 stars

[Lindsay Lemus]

3.5 stars for enjoyment. I don't rate books about people's lives anymore. Will share more soon.

[Lori · Rating 3 out of 5]

I would give this a 3.5. It is written by Deana Martin, Dean Martin's daughter. it is seen through her eyes. Deana talks much of her own life and growing up with a famous father. She wrote an honest account of her dad, biological mother and jeanne her step mother. Her dad left the family and his first wife when Deana was one to marry Jeanne. she lived with her mother until she was nine along with her three older siblings. It was not easy nine years. her mother was very mixed up, blew the money she received from Dean Martin, moved from place to place, drank and did not provide a stable home life for the four children.Dean Martin who spent a lot of time traveling to earn a living was not aware of how rough it was for his first four kids. At nine Deana and her siblings moved in with Dean and Jeannie. she spent the rest of her childhood living with them.
For the rest of the book she describes her dad and the movies he made, Jerry Lewis, His famous tv show in the 60s and 70s. There is a lot of name dropping in this book. Dean martin was friends with some very famous people. such as Frank Sinatra, Sammy Davis jr. all the famous people he had on his tv show.
Deana Martin tried to be fair. she loved her dad and had many good things to say about him but did not paint him as a saint, she also had good things to say about Jeanne who raised her as a mother, but also shared she was hurt by her when Dean and jeanne divorced and she kept Deana out of her life for years. This was a nice book. Deana tried to be honest with her feelings without sounding bitter during the tough times with her dad and other people. I liked this book for the most part. If someone is a fan of Dean Martin, they may find this an interesting read.

[George · Rating 3 out of 5]

ENTERTAINING AND ENJOYABLE

”…my eyes were drawn to a ring he was wearing on his little finger. “Here,” he told me, sliding it off and handing it to me. ‘I want you to have this’. ‘Thank-you,’ I said, and slipped the ring on.—page 166 [A gift from Charlie Manson.]

Over the past few years I've had the pleasure of seeing Deana Martin, in concert, at least a couple of times. She is every bit as charming on stage as her dad ever was, and at least twice as adorable. It was at these concerts that I first learned of her memoir: MEMORIES ARE MADE OF THIS: Dean Martin Through His Daughter’s Eyes, and added it to my to-read list. I’m glad I did.

The biggest surprise was reading that Deana, as a young adult, not only personally met Charles Manson, Charles ‘Tex’ Watson and Lynette ‘Squeaky’ Fromme—and was even called to testify at some of their legal hearings—but that she actually met them in the very house, on Cielo Drive, where Sharon Tate and four others were later brutally murdered. That took the spooky, small world and six degrees of separation factors to a whole knew level.

Recommendation: If your a fan of celebrity memoirs; this is a should read for you. And there’s lots of terrific photos, too.

“Conrad was late for dinner, and when he eventually arrived, his son asked him, ‘Dad, where have you been?’ “Trying to find a parking place,’ he said. ‘Why didn’t you just let the valet park it for you?’ ‘Too damned expensive,’ came the reply.—page 151 [‘Conrad’ is Conrad Hilton, Sr., then owner of the Hilton Hotels.]

Best quote of the book goes to Deana’s step-mom:

“After that, Jeanne had laid down her most famous rule: ‘Guns and cherry bombs are fine,’ she warned, ‘but I will not have hand grenades in this house.’”—page 43

NOOKbook editions, 282 pages

[Mark Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dean Martin was handsome, charming, funny, and had a terrific way with a song. Martin’s act as a loveable drunk was an invention, but it fooled the public for many years. After his breakup with Jerry Lewis in 1956, Martin needed a new nightclub act. Now he could expand his talents, as he no longer had to be just the straight man to the manic Lewis. Of course, the magic of Martin and Lewis was that Dean was so much more than just the straight man. Dino borrowed some of comedian Joe E. Lewis’ drunk act and made it his own. The transition from comedy duo to solo star was so successful that by 1961, a Saturday Evening Post article largely focused on the discrepancy between the public “Dino” that audiences saw on TV and nightclubs, and the private Dean Martin, who was in reality an early riser so he could get out on the golf course.

Martin’s daughter Deana gives readers an intimate view of the Dean Martin that few people saw in her 2004 memoir Memories Are Made of This: Dean Martin Through His Daughter's Eyes, written with Wendy Holden. The book is a fascinating look at the handsome, amiable man who succeeded at every medium he tried. Television, movies, records, live appearances, Dean Martin ruled them all.

Deana was born in 1948, the fourth and final child from Martin’s first marriage to Betty McDonald. While Dean quickly remarried, wedding Jeanne Biegger the following year, Betty never got over the breakup of their marriage and descended into alcoholism. When Betty left her children with her sister Anne, promising to be back in three hours, but then disappeared for three days, Anne took them to Dean and Jeanne’s house. This was the real beginning of Deana’s relationship with her father, who quickly obtained custody of his children from his first marriage.

Deana grew up in a blended household with six siblings, a very sweet stepmother who she quickly started calling “mother,” and a father who was working constantly.

Deana’s own personality seems to have been very in tune with her father’s and she realized quickly that she had to adapt to Dean’s schedule and interests if she wanted to spend time with him. High on the list of Dean Martin’s interests was golf. So, Deana gladly went with him to the driving range. Conversation was kept to a minimum. “Happy with his own company and entirely self-contained, he didn’t feel the need, as most of us do, to fill a gap in a conversation with chitchat.” (p.88) The hours Dean spent with Deana at the driving range meant a lot to her: “After years without a father, I was spending time alone with Dad at last, and that, to me, was the greatest prize of all.” (p.89)

At the very beginning of the book, Deana tells us what her response is when people ask her the question “Was he a good father?” She writes “No. He wasn’t a good father, but he was a good man.” (p.3) It’s an interesting distinction to make, and I think by the end of the book it makes sense.

For Dean Martin fans, one of the joys of reading Memories Are Made of This is knowing that Dean was just the nicest person. As Deana writes, “My father was, truly, the sweetest man in the world. He had a unique aura and was brilliant at making everyone around him feel good.” (p.79) That’s a true gift, and Martin’s warmth still comes across through the screens today. Whether he’s singing a song or acting in a comedy sketch, it’s impossible to watch Dean Martin and not smile.

Deana reveals some interesting facts about her father. One of the tidbits I found most interesting was about Dean’s reading habits: “He claimed he’d read Black Beauty in school, and it made him cry, so he decided never to read another book again.” (p.151) On the one hand, as someone who loves books and the written word, I’m flabbergasted that Dean wasn’t a reader. Didn’t he even read Airport, by Arthur Hailey, when he was cast in the movie? But on the other hand, I find it quite hilarious and pragmatic that Dean only read one book. Books make you sad, why read another one? Deana writes that if anyone ever told Dean at a party that they had written a book, Dean would reply “Congratulations, I read one.” (p.151) Which is a very funny and snarky thing to say.

Dean’s sadness over Black Beauty also connects to his love of horses. Dean rode the same horse, Tops, in many of his westerns. Dean was so sad when Tops died in 1972 that he left the set of the movie Showdown to bury the horse. Universal Pictures sued Dean for leaving the set, but he eventually returned. The writer Nick Tosches felt that Martin leaving the set of Showdown was so significant that he used it as a short prologue to open his 1992 biography Dino: Living High in the Dirty Business of Dreams. Although in the prologue Tosches doesn’t mention anything about Tops’ death, which seems to have been the catalyst for Martin walking off the set.

Deana Martin doesn’t dish too much dirt about her father, but she does mention that he had relationships with singer Petula Clark and actress Inger Stevens. I’m not surprised about Dean’s relationship with Petula Clark, as she and Dean had amazing, electric chemistry. Inger Stevens co-starred with Dean in the 1968 western Five Card Stud, which also starred another laid-back icon of mid-century cool, Robert Mitchum. Deana reveals that she had a brief relationship with Mitchum while they filmed Young Billy Young. Deana never told her father about her relationship with Mitchum, which is understandable. (p.164)

Deana’s special bond with her father was solidified when Dean’s mother Angela taught Deana how to make pasta fagioli, Dean’s favorite. One of the sweetest chapters of the book is when Deana starts making pasta fagioli for Dean after his mother’s death. It was a way for Deana to do something for her father, a man who had everything.

Memories Are Made of This is a charming and touching look at Dean Martin, one of the great entertainers of his time.

[Winter Sophia Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

Heartwarming, Touching, Fascinating & Honest!!! An Excellent Read!!!

[Bill · Rating 4 out of 5]

Deana Martin did a great job in writing about her father and family. She did not sugarcoat everything, but appears to be honest and not vindictive. I grew up in the '70s and '80s and I remember watching and listening to Dean Martin. I learned a lot about one of the icons of an era that is long since over. Learning some things about the "Rat Pack" was fun. The only thing that I can remember of that time period that Deana Martin did not include was the argument between Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. Maybe a few words of how it affected her father. But after reading the book, he probably didn't let it show since it appears he remained close friends with both until Sammy's death and then his own. If you are a Rat Pack fan, enjoy stars of the late '40s to '90s then I recommend this book. The list of names is quite impressive, from the rich and famous, to the notorious and even the faithful fans.

[Gary Anderson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dean Martin evokes for me a time and a style that is gone. He was suave and silly, a crooner whose greatest musical contributions were feel-good romantic ballads and novelty songs. As an actor, he seemed effortless and was always enjoyable to watch. When I was a kid, we always watched when a Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis movie came on TV for the Sunday afternoon matinee, and I still like to watch old videos of his great variety show and celebrity roast. And we were privileged to see the last night Dean performed on tour with Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. in Chicago in 1988. We just don’t have any entertainers or entertainment programming like Dean Martin anymore.

Deana Martin’s Memories Are Made of This is part tribute to her father and part autobiography, and it does an excellent job of portraying what Dean Martin was like at home and how he interacted with his family members. Deana Martin also gives an insider view of his career, taking us backstage at the variety show, and to Dean’s dressing rooms in Las Vegas and on movie sets, and in the recording studio. Although some of the family dynamics material becomes repetitive, she does an excellent job of helping readers understand the human being behind the consummate entertainer.

[Denise · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is about a time, a man, an era, that is gone and will never return. He was a self-made man who relied on his street sense, his talent, his charm and good old fashioned mid-western work ethics to create a life few even comprehend in its depth & realm. Men like this no longer exist - their time is gone, and fallen to generations of whiners, losers, spoon-fed brats who believe that the world owes them something. Ok...getting off my soapbox. This book and Dean’s life story is delightful, and lovingly told by his daughter who shares his strengths & weaknesses...and also continues to keep his name alive. The twinkle in the eye, the cool image, the incredible wit topped off by his amazing singing voice....all came from a man who was home for dinner every night & snacked on bread & butter sandwiches. I read this book while listening to his albums on Spotify.....and, altho the book is not a great work of literary prose, I thoroughly enjoyed spending this time with Dean, Deana, Uncle ‘Frank’, Uncle’Sammy’, and allowing myself to remember when I was growing up and men were real men. This book is a treat & I’m so glad to have peeked into the world of Dean Martin.

[Lauren⁷ 💜 · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is by far one of the best biographies/memoirs about Dean Martin that i've ever read. Written by his 4th daughter by his first wife, Deana tells what it was like growing up, with her mother Elizabeth (Betty) Anne McDonald, who was an alcoholic and as thus not the best mother. And when he found out about it, Dean's subseqensent custody suit, and what it was like when they went to live with him and his then-wife Jeanne. The rest of the book tells stories about what it was like growing up with him and Jeanne, and also many never-before-told stories about Frank and the rest of the Rat Pack. And also stories of the many famous entertainers, they met, such as the Beatles. It also tells about what it was like on the Martin family, when Dean-Paul died, and how hard it was on Dean. An absolutely wonderful book! That i would recommend to anyone (who's a fan of Dean Martin that is)

[Paulette · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deana opens her heart and shares stories and memories about her life growing up with one of the larger than life entertainers that has ever lived. Through statistics she proves his popularity but she also proves why he was so worthy of such admiration. She sets the record straight on his work ethic, his sense of discipline, his love for his children and even some of his personal habits.
She admits he was not the best father or husband, a non-communicator, distant solitary man at times, one consumed by what he enjoyed. At the same time he is very personable, easy and trusting and I felt I got to know who he was.
She moves through the timeline of their lives and his career and how she and her siblings and her dad’s different wives and friends connected and disconnected with one another over the years. A very good book written about one of my favorite entertainers.

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book. Everything you wanted to know about Dean Martin, by one of his daughters. He was not a good father, or a good husband. He was distant with most people. He loved playing golf, he was always on time, and he had a great relationship with Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis, Jr. I couldn't put this book down, and finished it in two days. I didn't really know that much about his family, but this book talks about all his marriages, and children, along with all the show business people he was involved in.
I just reread this book on 9-20-25 after seeing a two hour documentary on Turner Classic Movies and this book by his daughter still holds up.

[Darlene · Rating 1 out of 5]

Found this book to be extremely depressing; difficult to continue to the end of it. I knew several of the items about Dean Martin previously, but his daughter's acceptance of his difficult personality and lack of ability to maintain relationships with his children was something I could not deal with. Perhaps it was my state of mind at the time of the reading, but I would not care to complete reading this interpretation of family life.

[Lenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dean Martin's life told by his daughter Deana. A real slice of Hollywood.

[Ann Randall · Rating 1 out of 5]

Boring. Like reading a calendar

Long list of events just seem to drone on and on with poorly veiled self pity and just a recital of names and places. Disappointingly dull.

[Joe B · Rating 4 out of 5]

Deana Martin takes you on a transparent walk through the life from a child to an adult eyes about the greatest and wealthiest entertainer of our time. This biography touches on the things we did not know about whether we wanted to or not. In the end, it didn’t matter because whatever Deana wrote about him as a father and a man we still love Dean in spite of his frailties and mistakes. How can you not love Dean Martin?

This was an interesting story indeed. I bought this book from DeanaMartin.com and got autographed copy including a personalized note directly from Deana. This book includes everything about Dean and Deana’s siblings, mother, Betty, step mother, Jeanne, and other anecdotal stories about her life growing up in the Martin family. She includes many personal views of how Dean was more about providing love and respect for his audience, compatriots like Uncle Frank, and the outside world including his beloved golf game than he did his own family.

Dean was a quiet man who liked to keep to himself when was at home. Only spoke to and was with his children when it was required. Yes, he was not the “alcoholic” or partier that he portrayed, but a home body and orderly person who was up by 6AM to be on the movie set or golf course and at home in bed by 10PM. His routine was his life, but it did not include his children or three wives.

He came from Steubenville and made it by singing in the club circuit to eventually becoming part of the world’s greatest comedy duo of Martin and Lewis. After 10 years separating himself from that embattled relationship and never to speak to Jerry for over 20 years Dean moved onto solo greatness as not only a singer, but an actor who starred in over 70 films during his career. Associated most famously with the “Rat Pack” and Las Vegas, Dean was one the greatest consummate and iconic performers of our time.

His legacy left an permanent mark in the minds of his fans who will never forget Dean Martin. I am so glad that I was able to experience being a part of that culture back in the 60’s and 70’s watching his movies, show, and roasts as a young boy and teenager. He will always be my favorite singer of old. No one can even come close to his career. Thank you Deana for writing this book back in 2004. Well worth the read indeed.

[Roberto Canducci · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this book very carefully because I love Dean Martin, but honestly, I think, that there will be more personal information about Dean Martin. Much more it is not just about Dean Martin and about the Rat Pack and his life, but this book is more about Martin´s Family from Deana Martin point of view. I don´t like read parts about Deana Martin - Honestly, I want to hear something about Dean Martin not about her or her life. And because she doesn´t talk with him for some parts of her life, she doesn´t know anything personal from Dean Martin personal life or from the times when she don´t talk with him.

I am frustrated, that Dean Martin doesn´t write his own biography with his own words, but I know, that he just enjoys his life, and he doesn´t want to share his personal life with anybody. I think if he knows that Deana wrote this book, he would be mad on her.

Another thing is that I am sure, that if Dean Martin would write his own biography, we will see him in another light. Long story short, this book is much more about Martin´s family biography, but not about Dean Martin Biography. She just used his name and put his face on the cover. This book can be MUCH, MUCH better if she will write much more about Dean.

[Nipun · Rating 2 out of 5]

Within the first few chapters of her book ‘Memories are Made of This’, the author Deana Martin confesses of her father Dean Martin –

I began to make excuses for him
— something I have continued to do throughout my life.

This book seems an exercise in excuses – not only for the father but also for the mother – both extremely flawed individuals –

Without Gail (elder brother), we’d never have held it together. And sometimes, late at night, during Mother’s more raucous parties, Gail would lock us in the closet to keep us safe.
Mother was tremendous fun.

I was very grateful for this morsel of his (father – Dean Martin) time, even though I’d had to work so hard for it. Knowing how difficult it seemed to be for him to give of himself, I realized what a generous thing it was for him to do.
Had I not received this book as a gift, it is unlikely that I would have read about the life of a Hollywood Star – howsoever much I enjoy some of their songs. Reading it was informative in a way – at how real some over the top movie drama can be. What I also know is that I am even more unlikely to pick up such a book again.

Read full review here - https://theworldincultures.com/403-me...

[Helen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ms. Martin is not a great writer, but I don't think she was expecting a classic when she wrote this.
I have always been fascinated with Dean Martin. I was born in Steubenville, Ohio, where he was born. I didn't grow up there, because my family lived in Weirton, WV., just across the river from Steubenville. His daughter talks about how hard he worked to provide for his 7 children. He was very trusting with people handling his money, but it didn't serve him well.
Ms. Martin tried so hard to earn her father's love. She made his mother's Pasta Fagioli all the time for him. In fact, she has included the recipe for it at the end of the book.
I hope those of us who grew up in the upper Ohio Valley can appreciate this book. In the forward, she mentions people who were good friends of her father. One of them was Mario DiCarlo.

[Barbara Langlois · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting but certainly not an in-depth biography. In writing about the signet ring (from Frank Sinatra) which her father wore, she references it having been worn on the little finger of his right hand. Check again Deana. In the early years he may have worn it on the right hand but most photographs clearly reflect he wore on his left little finger.

She writes about another time in her life when she decided to write a book about her father. Although the idea was born when she was mad at him, as she relates their conversation, she indicated she had told him it would be a nice book, a good book about growing up with him as his daughter. As she relates, Dean repeatedly told her not to do it. And yet she did. After he died. Knowing his feeling, I think she did a disservice to his memory.

[Liquidlasagna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Never been a fan of the dark side of Jerry Lewis or Dean Martin or Frank Sinatra much, but no one's perfect..... sometimes the children are far more fascinating

Deana Martin has a lovely public persona, and the book does deal with some of the tensions of the family too....

but I've found some of her cookery to be incredible

she got this recipe which he was told to even keep it secret from her sisters

Pasta Fagioli

tubetini pasta - cannelloni beans
onion - water - extra virgin olive oil
Parmesan or Romano cheese
cinnamon - pepper - salt

---

many have chicken stock to deal with the usually bland and icky beans
and some recipes can be like 15 minutes or 2 hours to get the flavors

the cinnamon isn't very common, maybe in 10% to 15% of recipes I've seen
and maybe 70% have chicken stock

---

most definately like the Martin and Sinatra children a lot more!

[P. T. · Rating 4 out of 5]

A deeper understanding

I wasn’t born until 1964, so my memories of Dean are 1969+. Later in life I became a posthumous fan, and today, nearing age 60, nobody can put a smile on my face faster than Dean. I’m always in a better mood after hearing a song, watching him dance clumsily or slide down that pole! I’ve read Ricci’s book, too, and recommend it. Deana tells the story from a different perspective. I’ll be honest, there were times while reading that I didn’t like Dean very much, and times my opinion of Deana lowered as well. And then it hit me—that’s what makes this book so credible and SO good. It’s the truth. Not sure why I chose this particular weekend to read both books, or why last week I watched so many Dean Martin Show reruns. I caught a summer cold, I guess, and couldn’t do much else. Thanks, Deana, for opening up and sharing your story. Your epilogue was perfection. And thanks for the recipe, too! —Pete (near Memphis)

[Georgina · Rating 3 out of 5]

I bought this book at a book sale. And being of the generation that grew up with parents who listened to his music and watched his movies and TV shows and by osmosis did the same, I wanted to read about the man. Deana Martin writes this book from the perspective of a daughter and how her life and his life coincided. The writing is good and keeps you turning the pages but as a biography about Dean himself, it misses the mark. But then as she states many times, he was a closed man and a true biography solely about himself would probably never be written. Still, all in all, a good read -- worth the fifty-cents I paid for it. I'll pass it along to other fans for them to enjoy.

[Daniel Miller · Rating 2 out of 5]

I enjoyed it because it gave me some insight into the lives of some celebrities. He lived a very regimented life. Up at 6:00 and home 12 hours later. He was either on a set, recording or playing golf. Like most famous people he was pretty much an absentee dad. He worked 12 weeks a year in Vegas and did a lot of other work but he did have a home life. I think he was one of the luckiest people ever. Just as I expected he was cavelier about everything and must've been a lot of fun to spend time with. Surprising that none of his 8 children never considered going to college. I also enjoy being able to speculate. What if one of the Martins would've been a business manager.

[Christine Sinclair · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a surprisingly honest look at Dean Martin through his daughter Deana's eyes. She clearly loved him and misses him, but she also is forthright about his flaws as a father and a husband. Deana has lived through many ups and downs, but she seems to have come through it all with grace, kindness and forgiveness. Her memoir of her father's stellar career as a singer, actor and TV personality is very well-written and entertaining. The Rat Pack, Las Vegas, the split with Jerry Lewis, it's all here, but so are his three wives, his blended family, his remoteness and his devotion to his two most important driving forces: work and golf. A very good read!

[Linda Spear · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was not a big fan of Dean Martin or the Rat Pack or his buddy Frank Sinatra but because Dino was from Steubenville OH, I was curious. His daughter Deana did a very satisfying job writing about her father, warts and all. Two facts I was pleased to learn: 1) He loved his hometown 2) The drink he often had in his hand on TV was actually apple juice. (and why did I watch him on TV if I didn't like him much? It was the 50s and my parents ruled the TV!)

As a kid, I was much more enamored with Perry Como, probably because my mom liked him. And what a voice he had...just wish he'd been able to have his own way about some of the silly songs he was pushed to sing for popularity's sake.