Οι λέξεις δεν είναι για να πληγώνουμε

Best Behavior

by Elizabeth Verdick, Marieka Heinlen (illustrator), Καλλιόπη Κύρδη (Translator)

Χρειάζονται μόνο 24 γράμματα για να φτιάξουμε εκατομμύρια λέξεις. Άλλες είναι μικρές, άλλες μεγάλες, άλλες εκφράζουν ευγένεια, άλλες όχι. Όσο τα παιδιά μεγαλώνουν μαθαίνουν περισσότερες λέξεις. Και τις χρησιμοποιούν. Αλλά ανάμεσά τους υπάρχουν και λέξεις που πληγώνουν.
Με τη βοήθεια αυτού του βιβλίου τα παιδιά μαθαίνουν ότι οι λέξεις τούς ανήκουν, ότι πριν μιλήσουν μπορούν να σκέφτονται και μετά να επιλέγουν τι θα πουν και πώς θα το πουν. Θα ανακαλύψουν ότι υπάρχουν απλοί, θετικοί τρόποι να αντιδρούν όταν οι άλλοι τους λένε λόγια που τα πληγώνουν. Θα συνειδητοποιήσουν τη δύναμη της λέξης συγγνώμη, όταν οι δικές τους λέξεις θα πληγώσουν κάποιον άλλο.
Τα κείμενα είναι απλά και σύντομα ώστε να διαβάζονται μεγαλόφωνα από ένα παιδί, από μία ομάδα ή από μία τάξη. Η χαριτωμένη εικονογράφηση και η αμεσότητα των φράσεων καθοδηγούν τα παιδιά στην υιοθέτηση βασικών κανόνων καλής συμπεριφοράς.
Στο τέλος του βιβλίου οι ενήλικες θα βρουν θέματα για συζήτηση και δραστηριότητες που μπορούν να πραγματοποιήσουν τα παιδιά.

Για παιδιά από 4 ετών

Genres: Picture Books, Childrens, Friendship, Emotion, Nonfiction, Parenting, Back To School

44 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2004

About the author

Elizabeth Verdick has been writing books since 1997, the year her daughter was born. Her two children, now ages 13 and 8, are the inspiration for nearly everything she writes. Before becoming an author, Elizabeth edited books for children and parents.

These days she writes books for toddlers to teens, and everything in between. She especially loves creating new board book series for toddlers—the latest series is Toddler Tools™, which helps young children and their parents cope with those tough times and transitions that happen every day (like naptime and bedtime). The Best Behavior™ series helps toddlers reach new milestones and improve their day-to-day behavior.

Elizabeth also enjoys getting the chance to look at the funny side of life in the Laugh and Learn™ series, which helps kids ages 8–13 get a handle on the social/emotional skills they’re developing throughout the elementary– and middle school years. Elizabeth lives with her family and five pets near St. Paul, Minnesota.

Reviews

[Missy LeBlanc Ivey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Originally published in 2004. What a great book, and a much needed book, for young children today. I purchased this for $.25, yes, just .25 cents, from our local library sale. This one goes to my daughter-in-law for her Kindergarten class.

[Irini Gergianaki · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Χρειάζονται μόνο 24 γράμματα για να φτιάξουμε εκατομμύρια λέξεις. Άλλες είναι μικρές, άλλες μεγάλες, άλλες εκφράζουν ευγένεια, άλλες όχι. Όσο τα παιδιά μεγαλώνουν μαθαίνουν περισσότερες λέξεις. Και τις χρησιμοποιούν. Αλλά ανάμεσά τους υπάρχουν και λέξεις που πληγώνουν. Με τη βοήθεια αυτού του βιβλίου τα παιδιά μαθαίνουν ότι οι λέξεις τούς ανήκουν, ότι πριν μιλήσουν μπορούν να σκέφτονται και μετά να επιλέγουν τι θα πουν και πώς θα το πουν. Θα ανακαλύψουν ότι υπάρχουν απλοί, θετικοί τρόποι να αντιδρούν όταν οι άλλοι τους λένε λόγια που τα πληγώνουν. Θα συνειδητοποιήσουν τη δύναμη της λέξης συγγνώμη, όταν οι δικές τους λέξεις θα πληγώσουν κάποιον άλλο. Τα κείμενα είναι απλά και σύντομα ώστε να διαβάζονται μεγαλόφωνα από ένα παιδί, από μία ομάδα ή από μία τάξη. Η χαριτωμένη εικονογράφηση και η αμεσότητα των φράσεων καθοδηγούν τα παιδιά στην υιοθέτηση βασικών κανόνων καλής συμπεριφοράς."

[Kitty · Rating 4 out of 5]

Could have a few more words. I’d like some more examples, but in general another great best behavior book. Not one we’re ready for yet but hopefully some day.

[Nicki Gore · Rating 4 out of 5]

Words Are Not For Hurting is about children learning the meaning behind words. Sometimes its hard for children to grasp how much is behind what they say and this book is a great resource to encourage children to think before they speak, then choose what to say, and how to say it. In this book, it goes through how words are important. It explains how words can help you say lots of things, positive and negative. It even goes through how words help you describe feelings. It uses examples like left out, scared, and mad. It especially places an emphasis on how you can use your words to help in situations.

The major theme of this story is being on your best behavior and how words can help you in any situation.

I think this book is great and I will definitely be reading it to the kids I babysit. It's concise and easy to understand for kids of all ages. I also like how it explains how important words are. I also think this would be a great book for school because it highlights vocabulary.

I would recommend this book to teachers of younger grades because it could facilitate a vocabulary lesson. Also, for kids that get angry and have a hard time using their words I think this book could be a great visual for them.

[Kayleigh Muligan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a guide for children to learn how to use words in a nice positive manor. It is a very easy and basic book to teach children the power of words and how we use them. It uses pictures and quoted words to show that some words are long and some words are short. It teaches kids that saying words like "I love you" and "thank you" are positive and something that all people enjoy hearing. It shows the difference between words that are helpful and words that are hurtful. I think this is very important because bullying is something that occurs often. It is important that we teach kids at a young age to be respectful and kind to others. I gave this book a 5 star rating. I liked the way the author made the illustrations really powerful by showing interactions of positive and hurtful words. I could really feel the emotion through this and it helped me understand right from wrong. I really enjoyed how the book ended with the quote "words are not for hurting". It emphasizes the point that we should only use words to be helpful.

[Whitney Leanhart · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked reading this book because it was a basic layout of how words are used and what words we should be careful of using. This is a great lesson for children to understand because it applies to their everyday life. Words have a powerful impact when they are used to hurt someone, but there are always words to use for an apology. The author goes through scenarios where words can be used in a positive way and or negative depending what the message is.

[Megan DeHart · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is great for giving children examples on how words can be used both positively and negatively as well as easy to understand explanations on why you should choose your words carefully. There isn't much in the way of a story, it's more an informative piece. The illustrations are colorful and eye-catching and the addition of activities related to the reading in the back of the book was a nice surprise.

[Iman Altoot · Rating 5 out of 5]

(This book good for four years old) Some words are kind, and some of them are not. By using this book, we can teach little kids that some of their words affect other people. We can softly guide them to choose words that are helpful and use the magic word “I’m Sorry” With the simple words and excellent full-color make it perfect for reading aloud one on one in a small group. The book also contains some instructions for parents.

[Desirae Rentschler · Rating 5 out of 5]

I looked for a book like this to read to my class because they have been saying mean things to each other, and hurting each other's feelings. I wanted something to teach them that, that is not nice and not how you are supposed to use your words or express their frustration and feelings. My kiddos are in Prek and kindergarten, this book is awesome for reading to this group, it is short enough that it keeps their attention and direct enough that they listened and understood.

[Jessica · Rating 3 out of 5]

I got this for my four-year-olds as they are beginning to get sensitive about words others use and choosing their own words carefully. While I understand, it seems contradictory to put unkind words in without alternatives. I changed it up a bit as I read, asking them what they could say if they were done playing, or needed space, and the like. I’m hoping the book opens dialogue for us to talk about word choice and how to handle when others are less than thoughtful.

[Diane Tran · Rating 4 out of 5]

Goodreads Review #2:

Summary: “Words Are Not For Hurting” teaches children that they always need to think before speaking hurtful words, to choose what to say and how to say it, and to find positive ways to respond to others who use unkind words through gentle encouragement. This book includes different lessons for children to exercise their self-control and reflect on how words affect others’ feelings.

Themes: I believe the theme of this book is to encourage the use of nice words. It mainly focuses on behaviors, problem-solving skills, and feelings.

Personal Response: The title of the book says it all! I think this is a helpful book for kids who have a hard time using their words appropriately to express themselves. I would use this in my future classroom to teach students how to react to different situations happening inside and outside of the classroom and to apologize when we say something that we do not mean to. Also, there are many examples used in this book that offer students a guide to what to do and how to react to different situations.

Recommendation: I would highly recommend this book for everyone. It not only illustrates good tips for teachers and parents to teaching children basic social skills but also can also be used as a reminder for students to use their language wisely.

[Popo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Me encanta la idea de que con muy pocas letras puedes hacer muchas palabras y el planteamiento de que puedes usarlas para muchas cosas y puedes, entonces, elegir usarlas para cosas buenas, creo que es una reflexión valiosa.

"Your words belong to you. You choose what to say and how to say it. Your words can hurt or your words can help".

[Lindsey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book that teaches children that words are not meant to hurt people and if you do say something there are ways that you can fix it and make it better. Love that it's simple and easy to understand.

[Alicia Evans · Rating 3 out of 5]

For: readers looking for a book that talks about the importance of kind words and how bullying is wrong (with some additional talking points for parents/caregivers in the back).

Possible red flags: claims that all words can be taken back with a sorry; examples of harmful words.

[ملاك · Rating 4 out of 5]

نقتني النسخة العربية منها، نحفظ عبارة "الكلمات ليست للتجريح" ، نرددها لأنفسنا حينما نخطأ، ونعاتب بها الآخرين بكل لطف ولباقة! جميلة في بناء السلوك الايجابي وتجنب الأذى اللفظي وتعليم الطفل الدفاع عن حقه.

[Frankie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book so much. It taught me so much. I love it.

[Pamela Kinslow · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was good

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good idea for a book. Every lower grade classroom should have this.

[Cara Noyes · Rating 4 out of 5]

This will be good to share with classes that are spouting mean words. There are nice discussion questions at the end.

[Jessie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Key ideas: how to use words to communicate, thinking before we speak, apologizing when we say things that hurt others.

[Katie Sproles · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book to help teach kids the importance of being king and using your words wisely

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

An informative book for children when it comes to the subject of language/how words can affect others.

[Faloni © · Rating 5 out of 5]

Womp .

[Anne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this to a class that has been having issues with students saying mean things to each other and not stopping when asked. This is perfect for that situation. Hopefully it will make a difference!

[Annabelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this one!

[Hoppi · Rating 3 out of 5]

I used the book for learning new Spanish vocabulary and sentence structure. It did the job and I was able to read and understand it.

[yiming · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like the idea of teaching children that their words can impact others and to speak more mindfully. It would be cool if it had more suggestions for how to express feelings like anger, fear, sadness. Or for ideas within the text of how to calm oneself down. I'm not really into teaching kids to that they can take words back. The author suggests that kids say "I didn't mean it"--but it doesn't really work that way. I think it'd be better to teach kids to own what they say and share their feelings behind their words. Saying "I didn't mean it" just seems really fake and like an easy out to me. Their other suggestion: "I shouldn't have said that" also doesn't work for me. I would have preferred if it was "I'm sorry I hurt you" or something that acknowledges the impact on the other person. Overall, a decent book to open up a dialogue with children and parents / caregivers on loving, kind communication.

[Michelle Henry]

This book illustrates a great example of social and emotional skill for young children. The author addresses how to use words in a kind way to communicate feelings with peers and also how to respond to others if they chose not to use kind words. This book also illustrates good tips for caregivers and examples for students to use in their language as well.

Merged review:

This book "Words Are Not For Hurting" tells a sweet guide on how what you say should be uplifting to other peers, and not words that hurt their feelings. With tips for caregivers and teachers, this book suggests to children how to communicate effectively and positively with other people their age and older by giving suggestions on what to say.

Children will benefit socially from this book by being aware that what they say can greatly impact others around them.

[Angela Galvin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Words Are Not for Hurting is a story designed to teach students appropriate social skills. The story begins with an explanation of really short words such as "hi", "bye" and "no". The story then talks about how words help say important things such as "I love you" and "Thank you" "Your welcome". The book then discusses how at times, hurtful words come out such as ""your clothes are ugly" and "you are stupid" and "get out of here". The book discusses how people feel after they hear hurtful words and how people feel after they hear helpful words. The story discusses suggestions on what to do after hurtful words are said. The book could be used in a classroom to introduce signs, symbols and gestures. In addition, the book can be used as a social story to discuss polite words, feeling words, bad words and compliments.

[Hannah Hart · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are lots of words that you can choose from. Words can be helpful and nice, but they can also be hurtful or hurt our feelings. This book recommends ways to help children who are struggling to use nice words or children whose feelings are hurt by mean words.

I think this book can be so useful in so many ways! I love that it remains positive and addresses the feelings children have when they hear and say mean words.

This book would be so helpful in a classroom setting or one-on-one with a student that is either struggling to use kind words, or being bullied. The book also has activities in the back that would be so helpful for a school social worker in an elementary. I appreciate the helpful resources listed in the back that help adults utilize the full potential of the message in this book.