We Really Need to Talk: Steps to Better Communication

by Paul J. Donoghue, Mary E. Siegel

Paul J. Donoghue and Mary E. Siegel, best-selling authors of Sick and Tired of Feeling Sick and Tired , expertly guide readers past the pitfalls of poor interaction and offer six steps for healthy, honest, and constructive communication with spouses, family, friends, and coworkers. Every day we talk to convey information, clarify responsibilities, smooth difficult situations, and encourage others. Words can create deep emotional intimacy with spouses and friends, but often our words seem to thwart true communication rather than sustain it. Psychologists Paul J. Donoghue and Mary E. Siegel, longtime counselors and experts in communication, walk readers through some of the most frequent mistakes we make in talking to one another and offer simple practical corrections. Building on the insights contained in their best-selling book Are You Really Listening? , Donoghue and Siegel guide readers through engaging real-life stories, including the boss who needs to advise a failing employee, the parent whose daughter flouts curfew, the wife who wants to go back to school but thinks her husband will not approve, and many more. With clarity and humor, they encourage readers to pursue healthier and more satisfying relationships with six steps toward clear, honest, and effective self-expression.

212 pages, Paperback

First published October 1, 2010

Reviews

[Lindsay Winker · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was just okay. I purchased my copy in a back-stock sale at Ave Maria Press; otherwise, I’d never even heard of it. I do like collecting good advice about communication and trying to improve my own, though, so I gave it a try.

One of the cover blurbs describes this as a very straightforward guide, and that is a great way to characterize it. There are lots of summative statements, but they felt like blanket generalizations to me.

I liked their elaboration and examples of true “I” statements. I found several other gems buried among the copious sand (among them the list of feelings in the back and the specific categories of ineffective communication habits). Overall, I didn’t like the voice/tone, and I didn’t find many revelations to learn from in the course of my own interactions. I wouldn’t recommend this one.

[Kwan Ho Yeung · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book that talks about the importance of communication with one and other, also it tells what ways and skills that are effective when communicate. I really like this book and highly recommend you to read it, the skills and point are for anyone hoping to enrich close relationships with lasting trust and intimacy. After reading this book I learnt that the main point of communication is trust and be honest to others.