As Figs in Autumn a memoir: One Year in a Forever War

by Ben Bastomski

In his final college semester, Ben awakens to read on his computer screen of the death of his classmate and childhood friend Avi. Avi’s death is sudden and senseless, killed by a drunk driver on his way back to his dorm. Here begins Ben’s story of coming to terms with loss and finding his way to adulthood. In the fall of 2010, with his new degree in Moral Philosophy, Ben boards a plane to Israel to enlist in the Israel Defense Forces (IDF). Though Ben has never held a gun, before the next summer ends, he is a trained sharpshooter. His service takes him from the Negev Desert to the Occupied Territories and Gazan border, all while finding "home" at a southern kibbutz where he is adopted as a brother and son. From Providence, Rhode Island to California and at last to Israel where Ben joins  Mahal , the special set of non-Israeli-born Jews who volunteer in the IDF, he finds family where never expected, a place of his own in the Israeli mosaic. In a memoir that is both coming-of-age story and epic ballad, Bastomski’s lyrically told story is intensely personal and ultimately universal.

Genres: Israel, Memoir

256 pages, Hardcover

Published July 18, 2023

Reviews

[dana sun · Rating 1 out of 5]

degree in moral philosophy -> enlistment in the idf is actually so crazy it’s comedic

[vivi · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Words I could not rearrange to design any other message, one rigid chain of them, the one each of us was taught and was not expected to have to say, but to have ready in case:

Wakef walla-anna batuchak. In Arabic: Stop or I will shoot.

And there was a reason for this, because we were soldiers and not diplomats, and these words might save my life or that of a friend.

But I wondered if they could not have taught us each word instead of just the chain, so that within my mind I could rearrange these word magnets into more poems than just this one. Because the people of this city had heard this poem before from people like me, and not heard others. And when they saw me, I imagined they assumed I carried this poem, and no
others, and this assumption would have been correct. And they said nothing to me when I walked past in the streets, clad in ballistic vest and they in T-shirts. And though they looked at me proudly, I came to avoid looking back, because I imagined they knew I had only one thing to say to them.” (page 135)

*Favorite excerpt from the book*
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Such a captivating narrative, particularly the eloquence of Ben's prose. His writing has a melodic quality, guiding us through his journey of joining the Israeli Defense Forces after the tragic loss of his friend, Avi. May Avi rest in peace.

This narrative delves into themes of self-discovery, legacy, communal bonds, purpose, grief, and friendship. The depiction of Ben's experience at Kibbutz Be’eri with his host family, especially before the wrath of the October 7th massacre, offers a newfound perspective tinged with both optimism and sorrow, almost as if encountering ghosts from the past. It's truly a poignant and essential read that I will highly recommend to many.

[Antho2 · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fascinating insight into the IDF. Ben paints incredible pictures with his words.

[Susan Tuders · Rating 4 out of 5]

The language in this book is absolutely beautiful. I enjoyed learning from this memoir.

[Julia · Rating 4 out of 5]

To successfully write a memoir, you must have both an interesting story and the skill to tell it. Ben Bastomski nails both, and while his writing style, full of long and convoluted sentences, may be a bit tiring, I am astounded that this book has gotten so little publicity, if for no reason than its horrible timeliness. Bastomski’s book was published in July of 2023. Two months later, Hamas terrorists invaded Israel from Gaza and massacred civilians in the communities of Be’eri, Re’im, and Nir Oz, and attacked the military base at Nachal Oz. These are the places Bastomski takes us in his story of serving as an American volunteer, a “lone soldier,” in the Israeli Defense Forces more than a decade earlier, following the death of a friend. Stationed at Nachal Oz, he was “adopted” by a family in Be’eri, where red alerts for incoming rocket fire were a way of life; his unit relied on female lookouts just like the five taken hostage (and the many more killed) years later. His experience would have provided Americans with an interesting and relatable perspective after October 7th, and I would have expected his story to be everywhere in the media, yet I only heard about this book recently, by chance. What’s all the more puzzling is that, at a time when debut authors are expected to have massive followings already cultivated just to get a book deal, Bastomski has a practically nonexistent digital footprint. No writing credits, no active public social media. Apparently he’s practicing law in Israel now. It’s truly strange how the book industry works.

I appreciated the absence of cliches as he dealt with the moral and ethical aspects of his military service, particularly in the West Bank. Leaving the politics and judgments to others, he takes a very personal and introspective view, which I found refreshing and fascinating. Bastomski doesn’t owe us answers to the big existential questions in the Middle East, and he doesn’t try to provide them. There is no performative guilt, no assurances to the reader that he is, of course, a good person with the correct opinions. I think we’ve all had enough of that. If you can get over the quirks of his writing style, this is a very worthwhile window into grief and identity.

[Kristin]

Unreadable; same reading experience as Gilead by Marilynne Robinson--which, albeit, is many people's favorite book. Beauty is frequently and fleetingly conjured by the poetic writing, it's just very hard to access punctuated by other dense, impressionistic, nonsensical, banal, bleak, and modern stuff around it.

I would like the book if vast portions were cut out and instead it were formatted as small, miniature vignettes serving as poems or "flash fiction." Such as this extremely beautiful one, p.81, sandwiched on all sides by dreadfully different stuff, of which there are many sprinkled in:

"There is in the Negev a fleeting season, at the end of winter and the cusp of spring, in which the desert erupts into red bloom. These kalaniot (red anemones) are drawn forth by winter's cool and rain, and they overtake the landscape, engulfing it in a mesmerizing scarlet. Because the kalaniot will stay only a short time before ebbing into the hills under the heat of spring, many Israelis flock south to be awed by them before they go: in particular to the western Negev, along the Gazan border, where the conditions bring the kalaniot to grow richest and fullest. I had not before known of the kalaniot, so on my bus westward across the desert, toward bayit, I sat alone at the window and watched these dunes breathe in red. I had no name for this wonder and needed none, instead discovering for the first time the way the hills bled deeper and more gorgeous red as I continued to draw nearer the border."

[Erika Dreifus]

I was gifted a copy of this book. It's a memoir by a former "lone soldier," as Diaspora residents who volunteer to serve in the Israel Defense Forces are called; such soldiers don't have their nuclear families nearby (they are "lone").

Normally, I might have become impatient with the book's highly lyrical style—my taste runs to plainer language and more linear narratives. And I might have wished for more historical/geographical background to have been included to help contextualize the "forever war" (less for my own needs than for some other readers I envisioned reading it).

But reading this book after October 7, 2023, meant that as soon as I learned that this lone soldier had been "matched" with a family living on Kibbutz Be'eri—spending his frequent Sabbath leaves with them, calling the parents his parents and the children his siblings—I was riveted. And dreading what might have happened to this family that horrible day when Hamas terrorists came to their community. (The book, of course, ends long before that day; this post on the Jewish Book Council will fill you in: https://www.jewishbookcouncil.org/pb-....)

In short, it's difficult to imagine many more timely books--or better literary glimpses into life on Kibbutz Be'eri, before.

[Ursina Menn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bastomski reflects on his experiences as a soldier and the profound impact these encounters have had on his identity and humanity. His perspective on how soldiers are perceived by the opposing side is striking, as is his effort to understand and question the complex situation in which he finds himself. He is unafraid to reveal his vulnerability, exploring the deep inner conflicts and moral dilemmas that accompany his role. Another touching aspect is how he was embraced by his "adoptive family" in Kibbutz Be’eri, how he found a new home.

Bastomski writes profoundly in a thoughtful, prose style. Despite the outer façade of the uniform, deeper, often burdensome thoughts and feelings persist. The gentleness of the author’s words and his art of expressing emotions in poetic and powerful metaphors are deeply moving. Bastomski wields the power of words. A writer of eloquence and poise.

[Georges Siddiqi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book uniquely uses military service not for the military parts, but for the breaths between the military as a driver for exploring his development, history and character. Very uniquely and compellingly told story that keeps the reader turning pages, while driving them to really listen to not only what is being told, but how it's being told.

With the deeply layered prose letting you dive into Ben's mind, I find myself simultaneously left to wonder what his experiences would mean and do to me, were I to live them.

[Kari · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ben Bastomski was devastated to learn of his friend Avi’s death at the hands of a drunk driver. To help make sense of the tragedy and cope with his grief, he decided to follow Avi’s footsteps and volunteer for the IDF.

WHAT I LIKED: The writing was so poetic. Bastomski found beauty and purpose in his pilgrimage to Israel. He focused on the relationships forged and the wonder of the land around him.

WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE: There was no closure to his grief over Avi. In fact, it seemed like Avi was soon forgotten in the story, just a byline.

[Danielle · Rating 2 out of 5]

I want to like memoirs so bad but this was really hard to get through. I was expecting a bit more from this and a deeper dive on the ongoing conflict in the Middle East. Extremely interesting storyline but think this fell flat because of the way the book was written… back to romance fiction lol

[Charlotte · Rating 2 out of 5]

Just cannot finish this book. The writing doesn’t suit me.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

A gorgeous book that has never been more relevant.

[e]

Reading about Be’eri before.

[Sam Johnson · Rating 3 out of 5]

my second attempt at enjoying a memoir. i think this particular writing style is just a little bit harder for me to get through, but the story itself was fine

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very enjoyable read - a personal story about the author’s service in the Israeli Defense Force with deep reflections on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and universal themes about the moral dilemmas faced by soldiers.

The writing is beautiful to read - I found myself re-reading sections to make sure I had caught the nuances.

Each chapter connects to larger themes, but reads like a series of vignettes, so it’s easy to start and stop when you’re busy.