It's Okay to Manage Your Boss: The Step-by-Step Program for Making the Best of Your Most Important Relationship at Work

by Bruce Tulgan

Get what you need from your boss In this follow-up to the bestselling It's Okay to Be the Boss , Bruce Tulgan argues that as managers demand more and more from their employees, they are also providing them with less guidance than ever before. Since the number one factor in employee success is the relationship between employees and their immediate managers, employees need to take greater responsibility for getting the most out of that relationship. Drawing on years of experience training managers and employees, Tulgan reveals the four essential things employees should get from their bosses to guarantee success at work. A novel approach to managing up, It's Okay to Manage Your Boss is an invaluable resource for employees who want to work more effectively with their managers.

Genres: Business, Nonfiction, Leadership, Management, Audiobook, Buisness

208 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2010

About the author

Bruce Tulgan is internationally recognized as the leading expert on young people in the workplace and one of the leading experts on leadership and management. Bruce is a best-selling author, an adviser to business leaders all over the world, and a sought-after keynote speaker and management trainer.

Since 1995, Bruce has worked with tens of thousands of leaders and managers in hundreds of organizations ranging from Aetna to Wal-Mart; from the Army to the YMCA. In recent years, Bruce was named by Management Today as one of the few contemporary figures to stand out as a “management guru” and he was named to the 2009 Thinkers 50 Rising Star.

On August 13, 2009, Bruce was honored to accept Toastmasters International’s most prestigious honor, the Golden Gavel. This honor is annually presented to a single person who represents excellence in the fields of communication and leadership. Past winners have included Stephen Covey, Zig Ziglar, Deepak Chopra, Tony Robbins, Ken Blanchard, Tom Peters, Art Linkletter, Dr. Joyce Brothers, and Walter Cronkite.

Bruce’s newest book is IT’S OKAY TO MANAGE YOUR BOSS (Jossey-Bass, September 14, 2010). He is also the author of the recent best-seller IT’S OKAY TO BE THE BOSS (HarperCollins, 2007) and the classic MANAGING GENERATION X (W.W. Norton, 2000; first published in 1995). Bruce’s other books include WINNING THE TALENT WARS (W.W. Norton, 2001), which received widespread acclaim from Fortune 500 CEOs and business journalists; the best-seller FAST FEEDBACK (HRD Press, 1998); NOT EVERYONE GETS A TROPHY: HOW TO MANAGE GENERATION Y (Jossey-Bass, 2009); and MANAGING THE GENERATION MIX (HRD Press, 2006). Many of Bruce’s works have been published around the world in foreign editions.

Bruce’s writing appears regularly in human resources, staffing and management journals, including a new regular column in TRAINING magazine called ‘Sticky Notes’ and a regular column in the New York Enterprise Report. His writing has also appeared in dozens of magazines and newspapers such as the Harvard Business Review, BusinessWeek, HR Magazine, the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, and USA Today. As well, his work has been the subject of thousands of news stories around the world.

Before founding RainmakerThinking in 1993, Bruce practiced law at the Wall Street firm of Carter, Ledyard & Milburn. He graduated with high honors from Amherst College, received his law degree from the New York University School of Law, and is still a member of the Bar in Massachusetts and New York. Bruce continues his lifelong study of Okinawan Uechi Ryu Karate Do and holds a fifth degree black belt. He lives in New Haven, Connecticut with his wife Debby Applegate, Ph.D., who won the 2007 Pulitzer Prize for Biography for her book THE MOST FAMOUS MAN IN AMERICA: THE BIOGRAPHY OF HENRY WARD BEECHER (Doubleday, 2006).

Reviews

[L · Rating 3 out of 5]

The main points of this book;

- Clarify expectations
- Get adequate face time
- Conduct resource planning
- Understand how your boss works

There were useful, tactile advice sprinkled throughout the book. Nothing extremely out of the ordinary. Will look at other similar books and compare.

[Rachel · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book more focused on the traits of bosses than advice on how to handle them. It’s geared towards people who are low to mid level, and work in the same location as their boss. Tips like “arrive a little early” are really not very insightful at all.

[Joe Robles · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a person who is constantly seeking to improve my management style, I hadn't thought to take those tips and try to get MY boss to start using them. I know that I'm being undermanaged, but it hadn't occurred to me to just ASK to be managed better. My partner at work and I started about a month or so ago daily one-on-ones. We coordinate our weekly and daily plans so we can most efficiently make the most of our work time. Then our boss comes in and assigns several inserts that disrupt the whole process. Half-way through the book I realized that we needed to institute these daily one-on-ones with him as well. Like the bosses in this book, he doesn't completely understand what we're working on, and he doesn't see his inserts as taking much time or as too disruptive.

This book is filled with tips and suggestions that will definitely make your work life better. You can either just hate your boss, or actually try to be more effective. I recommend to anyone who feels that their boss isn't listening or doesn't understand what you do.

[Eman Abdulaziz · Rating 2 out of 5]

Basically, the title of the book should have been sth like "How to Manage Yourself Optimally?", as it has nothing to do with how to mange your boss.

Bottom line, the book has some good general tips, however, it is only intended for low or medium performers. High performers and the over managed wouldn't benefit that much from the content. Not all bosses can be dealt with using these unified guidelines, whereas some of the recommended approaches might have an adverse impact.

With regard to chapter 9- what if you work for a jerk boss, I find it somehow ineffective in its repetitive suggestions of clarifying things up and having the needed instructions!

Well, few jerk bosses don't provide their subordinates with what is expected from them or give clear instructions no matter how much you try. They just change their mind constantly and don't think of the work interest rather than how to use their authority to satisfy their egos or else!

What the book lacked was if I was over managed, how can I manage the situation or my boss?

[Jen · Rating 3 out of 5]

meh, sadly a lot of fluff. Boils down to a lot of common sense stuff that any longterm PM would already be familiar with.

[Julie H. Ernstein · Rating 4 out of 5]

My workplace (federal agency) offered a training by Bruce Tulgan last fall and I took it. During the Q & A toward the end of the seminar, after responding to each questioner he presented them with a copy of one of his several books, and It's Okay to Manage Your Boss was one of the books I received as a result of my participation.

The book's premise is quite straightforward--namely, most employees suffer from undermanagement and, as Tulgan candidly acknowledges throughout, it is his mission "to improve the working relationships between hard-working people and those who lead them" (p. 175). More to the point, this book offers concrete, step-by-step strategies for a specific type of "managing up" that allows a high-performing employee to assist their overloaded, overwhelmed, or perhaps even undertrained themselves in the management of staff boss in managing that employee. Tulgan makes provisions for "managing" what he identifies as the jerk boss, and Chapter 9 is devoted entirely to the jerk boss and strategies for overcoming seven subtle--or not so subtle--types of jerk boss behavior.

There is a lot of good information here, but I would caution readers that this is not a one-size-fits-all approach. The level of direction he suggests someone needs from their boss, and the intense amount of daily clarification and interaction recommended, at times came across to me as incredibly "needy." There were moments where I could not fathom the level of "thinking for you" Tulgan's advice seemed to suggest a manager needs to do for those folks they supervise. Of course, this is likely the fact that many organizations have layers of different types of managers and that someone with years of management and supervisory experience under their belt is never going to need to seek the repeated levels of clarity/affirmation/confirmation suggested in this book. Or perhaps his advice is great for someone new to the workplace and earlier in their careers where such direction bordering upon coddling would be more readily accommodated. That quibble aside, there is a lot of great stuff here that you may already be doing to document your performance on a daily basis so as to avoid having to pull a crazed all-nighter when prepping for your annual performance review.

I also want to caution that It's Okay to Manage Your Boss is most definitely not about manipulating your boss. Probably the single best piece of advice it offers is that the first person you need to manage in your relationship with your boss (or possibly bosses) is yourself. Tulgan also provides tips for self-assessment so as to ensure that the "jerk at work" is not you.

There is lots of great information, tips, and things to consider here. As with anything, take what applies to your situation and move along. Moreover, as you find yourself in changing circumstances throughout the course of your career, this may prove a book to return to as differing scenarios dictate.

[Lynette Ackman · Rating 3 out of 5]

Found some of the information really useful. Did feel the author wrote from a position of privilege and some advice might not work well for women or other minorities. (In fact, I laughed as one of his examples of what to do was exactly what I once HAD done and has haunted me at this employer ever since.)

Do want to read more on the subject of “managing up”.

[Spahic Jasmin · Rating 1 out of 5]

Non intuitive book, without clear messages. Not wort reading.

Not worth reading. Already known facts without this subject. No added value advices.
Unfortunately, it did not prove the title.

[John · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quick read and worth the read. Somewhat redundant and comparable to "It's ok to be the boss.". I cn think of a great many people who need to read this. Clears up the entitlement thinking out there.

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I listened to this book on Audible. Much of the advice seemed pretty basic to me, although good reminders. The last couple of chapters seemed the most useful. I'm not sure if it was the author's writing style or the cadence/delivery of the reader, but it sounded repetitive and simplistic.

[Meredith Moga Dooley · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was not it. The main advice was go above and beyond, stay late, start work early. Pester your boss about every minute detail. No thanks. I only finished this cause it was so short I was basically halfway done before I wanted to stop. might as well truck through.

[Juan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very Good

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

I didn't find a lot of new suggestions beyond what was presented in "It's okay to be the boss". This was similar but in the upward direction.

[Joosep · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some good points how to be more proactive and solution oriented in the relationship with you boss

[Alixe · Rating 2 out of 5]

extremely repetitive, without much content other than "it s worth investing the time to be and stay aligned with your boss". no duh.

[Oksana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of things run the book are just common sense things. While reading gif almost every next thing I found I have been doing almost all those suggested practices just because I felt that was the right thing to do. And it was pleasant to read and confirm that what I thought was my opinion and approach is actually also a good industry practice.
Good read - book reminded about few important things:
- first person you have to manage every day is you!
- get into habit of managing your boss
- take 1 boss at a time

Recommend.

[Angela · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting read, there were some ideas that were basic, and I have read them before. This also had some ideas of micromanaging yourself, an intriguing idea.

[Lynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Helpful and useful tips, however, the title may be intentionally toungue-in-cheek-misleading.

Nowhere in the book tells me how to manage my boss at all. Rather, what I got out of it was how to manage self at work, as well as items that would help boss manage one (or one's paperwork) better.

Documentation seems stressed here. I'm not sure documenting everything will be a time eater, but I'm following the advice for now. At the risk of looking stupid, OCD or "extranneous" I'm not sure how my boss will react if I hand her my documented work. But I'll try and see!

[Nilesh Patil · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has changed the way I use to look my meetings not only with the boss but even with my collegues. If you are in meeting and you can't make it productive or can't contribute you are in wrong meeting. Always try to make your meetings productive specially the one with your boss. Otherwise your boss wont be interested in talking to you. It really works.

[Hwei San · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great to have insights to know that we see bad managers anywhere regardless of ethnicity or country. Tulgan has provided some good tips and also steps on what can be done to learn how to manage our bosses.

[Julie Clarke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Since the relationship with your boss is the most important relationship in your career, this book offers great tips on taking control of that relationship.

[Frank · Rating 2 out of 5]

Read for my MBA curriculum Simplitic content, geared toward a very young professional. Some good points recorded in book notes.

[Nermeen Ismail]

good to read

[Rafael Schettino · Rating 5 out of 5]

Este livro te ajuda a ser um profissional melhor, posicionando-se de forma atuante em seu trabalho.

[A · Rating 4 out of 5]

good at pointing out why common advice doesn't work

[Anne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good tips on self-management and relationship building at work.

[David Holoman · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

A consultant advised me to deal with a particular situation by managing *up*, so I read this as research.

it basically says to manage your boss by having your own affairs totally in order. I have recommended it to my direct reports.

A good collection of good sense.