Lust for Enlightenment: Buddhism and Sex

by John Stevens

Over the centuries, Buddhism has responded to sexuality in a variety of fascinating ways, sometimes suppressing the sexual urge, sometimes sublimating it, sometimes cultivating it, and, on the highest levels, transcending it. This book reveals how Buddhists, beginning with Buddha himself, relate to the "inner fire" that drives humankind. Included are chapters on the Buddha's love life before his enlightenment, and his later relationships with women; the tantric approach to sex among Buddhists of ancient India, Tibet, China, and Japan; Zen in the art of love, and a positive discussion of women and Buddhism.

Genres: Buddhism, Spirituality, Sexuality, Historical, Religion

188 pages, Paperback

First published December 8, 1990

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.

John Stevens (1947- ) is a Buddhist priest and Aikido teacher.

Reviews

[Steve · Rating 3 out of 5]

In this 5 chapter book with 141 pages, John Stevens looks at sexuality through the history and mythology of Buddhism. He is a professor at Tohoku Fukushi University in Japan of Buddhist studies and is my mother's age.

The first chapter is about the Buddha, and includes his enlightenment where he transcends sexuality. It's a sexed up account, until he is enlightened, and then he's beyond temptation.

One might note he sees the Buddha as staunchly heterosexual, which he insists a few times, without proof or cites. Every time he insisted, my mind, trained in many graduate schools, shouted out, "heterosexual presumption!" In fact the book deals with homosexuality in the last pages of the book, where he noted it could be quite common at times.

In the second chapter Stevens discusses the "puritain elders" who say to try and extinguish passions in favor of non-attachment. People are persuaded to be celibate. Meditation on the loathsomeness of the body is seen as a method for calming the passions. See the body as a bag of blood, pus and filth. Also imagine the decay of a dead body. (The author identifies the voice as "puritain Buddha".) I used to have trouble sustaining the image of seeing someone throughout the life cycle, but I'm getting better and better at not reassembling the body into voluptuousness.

Chapter two is a ribald tale where for every monk's transgression, but Buddha makes a rule against such and such. Every, and I mean every, scenario is considered, and forbidden for the monks by the Buddha. This section is derived from the vinaya, which might be a fun read in terms of what people did to bring about such and such a rule. It's a kind of Starr Report; under the pretext of condemning actions, it titillates. Wild times in ancient India with salacious details. I read them out to my girlfriend because they were pretty shocking at times.

Reading what I first read in Vishvapani's book on the Buddha, that the Buddha said it would be better to stick your penis into a snake's mouth, than into a woman, I find that pretty shocking.

My complaint about chapter 2, is I don't know why he occasionally inserts more modern examples into the ancient Pali sanskrit examples. I would have preferred a historical order. But I also admire that he's read all this stuff and collected all these stories into one place.

Stevens is good at culling from the buddhist tradition sexuality, though he doesn't repeat the suggestion he had in his last book, that the Buddha has sex with the rice milk woman. He quotes a lot of primary texts from the Pali Cannon

In chapter 3 he makes the common mistake to see Vimalakirti as a "layman". Sangharakshita deftly puts that silliness to bed in his book about the Vimalakirti Nirdesa, called Inconceivable Emancipation, which is one of his best books about a text. The whole book is about how silly the different dualism of Mahayana and Hinayana are, so to say Vimalakirti is a lay buddhist is to kind of not get the whole text's point.

Stevens uses good footnotes, and he refers to a literature I'm not familiar with. But there were key Buddhist quotes that could be controversial, and called to mind Bodhipaksa's wedsite Fake Buddhist Quotes. He combines the Buddha's last two statements into one statement, for one thing.

Chapter 3 continues on into Tantra, Cha'n and Zen tradition, as does chapter 4. Which brings to mind something a friend said. Someone quoted another order member to support their position, to which my friend said, "you can find an order member who believes in everything." Just because there were times when it was OK to be a Buddhist monk and be very sexual, doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. If you are suffering under a repressive idea of sexuality, then this book might be a kind of Kinsey report for you. And I want to know what the tradition says.

Through the countless examples you see varying tolerance to sexuality by society, and how sexuality bubbles over despite "spiritual" desires. At times the guru gains status, at others he loses it.

He also mentions that in quite a few of the sexual practices, the man is not supposed to come.

Chapter 5 is about marriage, and has many examples of various configurations of polyamory, and examples of love and fidelity. You can find statements suggesting monogamy is the best. Here as in other places takes a kind of bookish sociology--what can be found out in books about a buddhist society of the past?

To refrain from sexual misconduct can be interpreted narrowly, a point to chastity, or it can be interpreted widely, and point to the potential joys, and just don't do anything extreme that hurts someone or yourself. Deceit is seen as the unskillful act. Lust, if it is pure, can be a path towards enlightenment, according to Stevens. How to purify lust, he does not really say.

I get the sense that Stevens is interested in his subject, but he doesn't share any instruction in spiritualizing sexuality that he has gotten. All the books that purport to instruct along those lines are out of print, and cost a fortune used.

Stevens is mostly an expert on the Japanese tradition, and he doesn't bring much beyond reporting things. The only implied perspective in the narrative is that collecting and reporting all this stuff is a worthy project. I don't think I was harmed by it. Buddhist culture is very diverse. I bet there existed traditions within all the major religions to spiritualize sexuality.

Writing a book isn't easy, and this one isn't bad for a trail blazer. To my knowledge it's the first English language book on sexuality in buddhism. I don't know why it's so natural to criticize. Listen to sports radio and you mostly hear about how people made mistakes. Teams win sometimes, and then it comes to testosterone filled taunting of the opponents fan base, not a real joy in success. So, avoiding that spirit, I wish to say that while I have these nit picky things to say, it's out of joy in the book that I comment, and that I'm a work in progress, who has a lot of work to do.

[Irene Jurna · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ik niet wist dat prins Gautama - die later de Boeddha werd - héél veel seks had toen hij jong was. Ik heb al vele verhalen over de Boeddha gehoord, maar nooit was er iemand die me dit vertelde:

“Om de jonge prins aan het paleis te binden, hadden hoge ambtenaren de koning geadviseerd om het hem op het gebied van de liefde aan niets te laten ontbreken.” Daarom zorgde de koning voor talloze meisjes van plezier.

Deze vrouwen waren voortreffelijk opgeleid in sekstechnieken. Een greep uit de opsomming van een half A4: “de vastklampende houding, de zwevende houding, benen in de lucht, de krab, de schildpad, en de springende tijger.”

Zo is het boek een verhandeling over de geschiedenis van seks en boeddhisme, met nog veel meer vreemde, grappige en open-minded feitjes als deze.

[Karie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an eye opening look at the lengths monks will go to to get their jollies on their quest to transcend their human-ness. As if. Its interesting that the same restrictions regarding celibacy placed on (Catholic) priests has led to widespread pedophilia while the same restrictions placed on Buddhist monks seemd to involve dead bodies and inanimate objects. Weird. Gross.

[Paul Bard · Rating 2 out of 5]

Wouldn't go too far as to say that the discussion of sex in Buddhist culture is prurient, but the concern of the book frankly seems to be philological rather than pragmatic.

I appreciate the variety of quotes from far flung sources on Buddhism and sex, and the mildly interesting disclosures. They could have easily crossed into gossip and did not.

But I was hoping for more of a pointed discussion with personal examples of handling sex wisely, and the book concludes with "just do no harm" which is humble and true, but perhaps not what I was hoping for in a read on sex and Buddhism.

[Michael Bagnoli · Rating 2 out of 5]

A diverse compilation of stories of Buddhist laymen and women, monks and nuns, and their relationship with sex throughout history. While the “puritan elders” encouraged celibacy, Tantric and Zen Buddhists had a more nuanced view of sex, best described by the following passage on the penultimate page of the book: “if the act of sex is consummated selflessly and with compassion, if it is mutually enriching and ennobling, if it deepens one’s understanding of Buddhism, promotes integration and spiritual emancipation, and is, above all, beneficial to all the parties involved, it is “good.” If, on the contrary, sex erupts from animal passion, is based purely on physical pleasure, and originated in the desire to possess, dominate, or degrade, it is “evil.”

Put simply, “if your heart is pure, all things in your world will be pure.”

[Tandin Namgyel · Rating 4 out of 5]

𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗲, 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗱 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗲 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗲!
&
𝗘𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗖𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗶𝘀 𝗮 𝗣𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗕𝘂𝗱𝗱𝗵𝗮! (Buddhism against abortion)
This book highlights the importance of being faithful, devoted and virtuous to your partner, your families, and of course, to the religion you are seeking. It also gives views into a much deeper comprehension of Buddhism against the sexual activities.
Peace should develop from within, then only, you will be able to disseminate peace to your world.
It also gives a visual journey into the life of a Buddha (when he was a prince, what changed him to seek truth, and how he actually gains enlightenment)
Therefore, it is important to be always guided by the words of the Buddha and embark ourselves on a fruitful and experiencing journey of us into this temporal world.

[Benjamin Pearson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Based on previous reviews. It seems, some are approaching this to receive guidance around sex and Buddhist practice. What you will find, is just what you find in wider society. Sex is really complicated.

I enjoyed how Stevens explored the way Buddhist societies engaged with a whole host of sexual issues. Examples include differing views on prostitution, marriage and alternative relationship. Puritanism, tantric and something in between. Abortion? Sexual freedom? The list goes on. Different societies, different times and unique / interesting outcomes.

I really enjoyed this read. It was really funny in places and generally very entertaining. I walk away with a richer view of sex and Buddhism both. Great food for thought and reflection.

[Mits · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting, often amusing, sometimes disturbing, read about Buddhist views on sex, passion, and marriage. The book is essentially a list of Buddhist texts, stories, quotes, and poetry related to sex, relayed one after another. I wish the book had more analysis of the texts, with more commentary from the author about their nuance, context, significance, etc. If interested in Buddhist thoughts on sex, I would recommend Ties That Bind by Ohnuma - while the primary focus of that books is motherhood, it naturally discusses sex as well, but with much more interesting analysis from the author.

[Obsidian Eagle · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very unique volume that delves into the little known side of Buddhist attitudes toward sexuality over the course of several centuries and throughout numerous nations. From prince Siddhartha's sensual escapades during his younger days, to the Tantric exploits of some naughty nuns and monks, there is probably no more detailed account in existence. Replete with bawdy illustrations, it's a book sure to titillate as well as educate!

[PJ · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's divided into 3 sections:

1) Puritan Buddhism (no sex but won't stop talking about sex)
2) Tantric Buddhism (lots of sex to the point of debauchery)
3) Zen Buddhism (open minded middle path? Celibacy/Polyandry/giny/amory/Marriage all OK, as long as intentions are pure).

Overall super fun read.

[Anttoni · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent peek of a collection to Buddhists relations to sex and sexuality. Some may find this book blasphemous as Stevens does not try be overly gentle with his subject matter, choosing rather to "expose" the contradictions and two faced morality when it comes to sex inside buddhism.

[Dario Boen · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was alright. Interesting perspective on sex

[Paul · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting and frank survey of attitudes and anecdotes about sex and sexuality in the Buddhist world. Perspectives range from the strict (but hard to maintain) asceticism enjoined by Buddha on his monks, to the elaborate use of sex as a meditative practice in tantric Buddhism. The "rules" for sex are actually not clear in Buddhism; to me it seems that the practitioner is pretty much on his own in sorting out how to relate with it spiritually. I found it a bit strange that the author left a discussion of contraception, abortion, and homosexuality to the very last pages of the book.

[Rebecca White · Rating 3 out of 5]

Buddhism has a multidimensional view of sex: there have been puritan and celibate movements, and then at the (seemingly) opposite end of the spectrum is Tantrism which involves submerging oneself in erotic sensations. In this way of looking at the world all of it can and should be a way of exploring and learning about yourself and the universe you're a part of. This book should be read more for history and the stories it contains rather than as a guide for negotiating one's own sex life, although there are certainly principles given that can be used. There is something a bit distant and academic in the style of writing, which may put some off.

[Algernon · Rating 3 out of 5]

A few essays comparing different lines of Buddhist teaching and practice, and how they deal with sexuality. Well researched and written - I recommend it if you are actually interested in this topic.