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Baby Bond: The New Science Behind What's Really Important When Caring for Your Baby
Meticulously researched and warmly presented, the most authoritative and persuasive guide to attachment parenting
When it comes to early parenting, scientific evidence points time and again to the bond between parent and child as a critical factor in a baby's health and wellbeing. Backed by more than 1,200 trusted sources, this breakthrough guide reveals the many little-known advantages that only a responsive, nurturing parenting style can provide:
Surprising evidence on the benefits of breastfeeding
How attentiveness and touch impacts permanent brain development in infants
Under-reported facts about how to reduce colic, food allergies, and illness
Why sharing sleep is both safe and natural
How to reduce future teen-year stress by bonding with your young child early
At the forefront of a passionate, growing movement called "attachment parenting," this warmly presented guide is a rare overview of information too often missing from parenting circles, pediatric offices, and financially motivated product promotions.
Why Attachment Parenting?
Cultures around the world that practice more natural forms of parenting have healthier infants who cry much less, toddlers who do not exhibit "terrible twos," generally respectful teenagers, and independent adults who participate in family matters.
A well-controlled study found sleeping outside of the parents' room brought 10.5 times the risk of SIDS as sleeping in the parents' room.
Studies have shown that infants who receive frequent physical affection have lower overall levels of stress.
In the United States and other industrialized countries, the infant death rate for formula-fed infants is twice that of exclusively breastfed babies.
- Excerpt from The Baby Bond -
Most would agree that children probably do not consciously remember the way they were treated during early infancy. Many recount this observation as support or comfort for their ideas about ignoring babies' cries for attention and providing minimal stimulation. Yet, it can be shown that while the specifics may be lost, unconscious memories are developed on the neurological and biochemical level from birth-a baby's brain develops from day one according to its environment. Childhood, adolescence, and adulthood are all affected by this early programming. And, as far as the coveted independence goes, it has been shown that those who receive the most affection early on display the highest levels of independence as adults.
-Praise for The Baby Bond -
"Babies would tell you to buy this book!"
Jan Hunt, MSc
When it comes to early parenting, scientific evidence points time and again to the bond between parent and child as a critical factor in a baby's health and wellbeing. Backed by more than 1,200 trusted sources, this breakthrough guide reveals the many little-known advantages that only a responsive, nurturing parenting style can provide:
Surprising evidence on the benefits of breastfeeding
How attentiveness and touch impacts permanent brain development in infants
Under-reported facts about how to reduce colic, food allergies, and illness
Why sharing sleep is both safe and natural
How to reduce future teen-year stress by bonding with your young child early
At the forefront of a passionate, growing movement called "attachment parenting," this warmly presented guide is a rare overview of information too often missing from parenting circles, pediatric offices, and financially motivated product promotions.
Why Attachment Parenting?
Cultures around the world that practice more natural forms of parenting have healthier infants who cry much less, toddlers who do not exhibit "terrible twos," generally respectful teenagers, and independent adults who participate in family matters.
A well-controlled study found sleeping outside of the parents' room brought 10.5 times the risk of SIDS as sleeping in the parents' room.
Studies have shown that infants who receive frequent physical affection have lower overall levels of stress.
In the United States and other industrialized countries, the infant death rate for formula-fed infants is twice that of exclusively breastfed babies.
- Excerpt from The Baby Bond -
Most would agree that children probably do not consciously remember the way they were treated during early infancy. Many recount this observation as support or comfort for their ideas about ignoring babies' cries for attention and providing minimal stimulation. Yet, it can be shown that while the specifics may be lost, unconscious memories are developed on the neurological and biochemical level from birth-a baby's brain develops from day one according to its environment. Childhood, adolescence, and adulthood are all affected by this early programming. And, as far as the coveted independence goes, it has been shown that those who receive the most affection early on display the highest levels of independence as adults.
-Praise for The Baby Bond -
"Babies would tell you to buy this book!"
Jan Hunt, MSc
434 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2001
6 people are currently reading
98 people want to read
About the author
Linda Folden Palmer
3 books5 followersHaving run a successful chiropractic practice for over a decade, focused on nutrition and women's health, Palmer's life became transformed in 1995 as she was confronted not only with health challenges in her newborn son but also with a frustrating lack of useful advice from pediatric sources. As she delved into medical studies for answers she became amazed by large conflicts between the research findings and standard pediatric protocols. Her extensive literature reviews and consults with young families culminated in her writing “Baby Matters.” After an IPPY Award-winning 2nd ed., the 3rd ed. was temporarily released as The Baby Bond. After a print-run sell-out, “Baby Matters” is back. Palmer also co-authored What Your Pediatrician Doesn’t Know with pediatrician Susan Markel.
Extensively documented, her healthy parenting books present the scientific evidence behind attachment parenting practices, supporting baby's immune system, and sparing drug usage. Palmer has instructed in physiology, pathology, and pediatric nutrition, lectured in breastfeeding, and has served as one of Mothering’s “Ask The Experts” since 2001. She lives in San Diego with her son and physicist husband.
You can find an assortment of infant health articles at her website BabyReference.com and her Facebook pages, The Baby Bond and Baby Poop.
Extensively documented, her healthy parenting books present the scientific evidence behind attachment parenting practices, supporting baby's immune system, and sparing drug usage. Palmer has instructed in physiology, pathology, and pediatric nutrition, lectured in breastfeeding, and has served as one of Mothering’s “Ask The Experts” since 2001. She lives in San Diego with her son and physicist husband.
You can find an assortment of infant health articles at her website BabyReference.com and her Facebook pages, The Baby Bond and Baby Poop.
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
June 29, 2010
I learned about this book after I had my first child and for some reason bought it but never got around to reading it. I think I didn’t want to read it because he was already born and a couple months old when I got it and a lot of what she talks about concerns those first few months. I started to read it and it felt like I was in trouble by my mother so I stopped. I wanted to read it BEFORE my second child was born but that didn’t work out. I finished it a couple weeks ago and I don’t think I’m too far behind the game this time. Overall, this was a very informative book. It’s full of information and it’s easy to go into information overload but if you have children or are thinking about children it’s a good book to read so that you can have a broader knowledge of what caring for children can mean for your life and your lifestyle. A lot of people refer to this book as an Attachment Parenting Primer, and part of it is, but it’s also like a textbook.
Some of the major points covered in this book:
1. Attachment Parenting: The first section talks about the change in parenting styles over the years. She tries to put a stop to the idea that “spoiling” a baby is possible. For quiet some time now people have been concerned with not spoiling a baby with too much attention. If you pick them up every time they cry you’re spoiling, if you rock them to sleep you’re spoiling them, if they fall asleep on you and you hold them you’re spoiling. Personally, I kind of agree with that to some extent. I always picked up my children when they cry and I don’t have a problem “spoiling” a baby but at some point you have to get them to transition on their own right? I wear my newborn in a sling and she sleeps, I feed her on cue, I spend a lot of time in physical contact with her because she needs it, my son didn’t. I plan to transition my daughter into becoming less attached to my being with her every second of every day. To say overall there’s a right and a wrong way to do something seems a little short sighted. The author sites numerous studies showing that unattached children can turn into degenerates and serial killers who can’t form lasting relationships and have miserable adult lives. It felt like she was trying to scare the reader into believing her views which is easy to do with new parents because they are so afraid anyway of making a mistake of any kind. I agree with attachment parenting to some degree (I will discuss more later) but it has to work for the whole family and it doesn’t have to be an all or nothing approach. There are no time lines or guidelines for how long you should carry out some or the attachment parenting practices. I found that completely not helpful.
2. Breastfeeding vs. Bottle feeding: When I was pregnant the first time, I never considered anything but breastfeeding. It provides the best nutrition for my child and it’s free, not to mention you lose weight while doing it. The first two factors were the most important to me. The thought of buying formula, spending all that money on it when I could offer a superior form of nourishment seemed insane. I know some people try and can’t so they have to turn to formula, but using formula because it’s more convenient? That doesn’t make sense to me. Breast milk is always there, always ready, always the right temperature, and pretty much an endless supply. I learned a lot about the long term benefits of breastfeeding from this book. There’s a lot of good information in here if you’re on the fence about whether or not to do it. If nothing else, read that section. Try to ignore the somewhat snobbish attitude of the author and you’ll be fine. People raise perfectly healthy, happy, well-adjusted children on formula. I know, I’ve met some.
3. Co-sleeping: I’ve seen those nanny shows where people ask for help with their kids and there’s always a problem with bedtime. I never wanted to be one of those parents who’s kids sleep in their bed or a parent that had to sleep in the bed with the child in order for them to go to sleep. I didn’t want to have to stand over the crib and sing to the baby in order to get he/she to go to sleep. Maybe that makes me lazy or a terrible mother I don’t know but it’s not for me. My son takes a bath, gets dressed for bed, reads stories, and then gets in his bed and falls asleep on his own. I don’t sit in there until he falls asleep, he doesn’t lay in my bed, I don’t rock him to sleep. He’s a good independent sleeper which was important to me. I’m trying to create the same thing in our daughter. She’s not as good as he was, yet. I made a serious effort to put my son down in his crib when he fell asleep. I didn’t let him scream himself to sleep in the crib, but when he did fall asleep he laid down. If he woke up, we started over again. It was exhausting but he’s a great sleeper now. I don’t like co-sleeping. I don’t sleep as well with the baby in the bed with me, I feel like the children have invaded a part of my life that should be just for me and my husband. I don’t mind all cuddling together in the morning, we do that. But the third person in the bed all the time is taxing. I don’t agree with this section at all but I see her “points” they just don’t work for my family.
4. Cow’s Milk: The sections on this were very interesting. I am lactose sensitive or have a milk allergy. I learned that real lactose intolerance is something a lot more serious than what I have. We don’t drink cow’s milk in our house. Since we buy a quart every two weeks for cooking, and use organic rice milk for everything else, we decided our son would just drink rice milk. It has the same nutrients because it’s fortified, he gets vitamins C and D and we buy fortified orange juice containing both as well. I’m not concerned about his nutrient intake. I was concerned about his body reacting to a milk allergy. It’s likely because I have one he would, and it’s painful. His liver and kidneys can be spared the extra work involved with digesting and breaking down all the extra minerals in cow’s milk that people don’t need. Not to mention all the other possible effects on his body and behavior that can come from milk allergies. I was shocked at the information about the milk industry and the formula industry who push for cow’s milk and cow’s milk products. It’s not that dissimilar to the tobacco industry but because it’s milk we don’t see it in the same light. The bottom line is that milk and other food allergies can be the basis for problems that often go undiagnosed or misdiagnosed for a long time causing serious damage to the body and brain. People were not meant to drink cow’s milk and cow’s were not meant to produce the amount of milk we consume, and the methods we use to continue the production are turning out to be harmful to us.
The author of this book is very passionate about what she writes because she had to find out this information on her own while dealing with a “problem” child (picky eater, poor sleeper, colicky baby, gassy baby etc). Her opinions are very strong at some points but she does back up a lot of her arguments with facts from studies. The studies come from all over the world because we are not the most forward thinking nation, when it comes to this area. The amount of good information in this book outweighs the annoying snobbish attitude of the author who makes you feel guilty for not doing everything she says (or was that just me?). When caring for our children the best we can do is be armed with information, and this book gives you a lot more to draw from if you have a “problem” child.
Some of the major points covered in this book:
1. Attachment Parenting: The first section talks about the change in parenting styles over the years. She tries to put a stop to the idea that “spoiling” a baby is possible. For quiet some time now people have been concerned with not spoiling a baby with too much attention. If you pick them up every time they cry you’re spoiling, if you rock them to sleep you’re spoiling them, if they fall asleep on you and you hold them you’re spoiling. Personally, I kind of agree with that to some extent. I always picked up my children when they cry and I don’t have a problem “spoiling” a baby but at some point you have to get them to transition on their own right? I wear my newborn in a sling and she sleeps, I feed her on cue, I spend a lot of time in physical contact with her because she needs it, my son didn’t. I plan to transition my daughter into becoming less attached to my being with her every second of every day. To say overall there’s a right and a wrong way to do something seems a little short sighted. The author sites numerous studies showing that unattached children can turn into degenerates and serial killers who can’t form lasting relationships and have miserable adult lives. It felt like she was trying to scare the reader into believing her views which is easy to do with new parents because they are so afraid anyway of making a mistake of any kind. I agree with attachment parenting to some degree (I will discuss more later) but it has to work for the whole family and it doesn’t have to be an all or nothing approach. There are no time lines or guidelines for how long you should carry out some or the attachment parenting practices. I found that completely not helpful.
2. Breastfeeding vs. Bottle feeding: When I was pregnant the first time, I never considered anything but breastfeeding. It provides the best nutrition for my child and it’s free, not to mention you lose weight while doing it. The first two factors were the most important to me. The thought of buying formula, spending all that money on it when I could offer a superior form of nourishment seemed insane. I know some people try and can’t so they have to turn to formula, but using formula because it’s more convenient? That doesn’t make sense to me. Breast milk is always there, always ready, always the right temperature, and pretty much an endless supply. I learned a lot about the long term benefits of breastfeeding from this book. There’s a lot of good information in here if you’re on the fence about whether or not to do it. If nothing else, read that section. Try to ignore the somewhat snobbish attitude of the author and you’ll be fine. People raise perfectly healthy, happy, well-adjusted children on formula. I know, I’ve met some.
3. Co-sleeping: I’ve seen those nanny shows where people ask for help with their kids and there’s always a problem with bedtime. I never wanted to be one of those parents who’s kids sleep in their bed or a parent that had to sleep in the bed with the child in order for them to go to sleep. I didn’t want to have to stand over the crib and sing to the baby in order to get he/she to go to sleep. Maybe that makes me lazy or a terrible mother I don’t know but it’s not for me. My son takes a bath, gets dressed for bed, reads stories, and then gets in his bed and falls asleep on his own. I don’t sit in there until he falls asleep, he doesn’t lay in my bed, I don’t rock him to sleep. He’s a good independent sleeper which was important to me. I’m trying to create the same thing in our daughter. She’s not as good as he was, yet. I made a serious effort to put my son down in his crib when he fell asleep. I didn’t let him scream himself to sleep in the crib, but when he did fall asleep he laid down. If he woke up, we started over again. It was exhausting but he’s a great sleeper now. I don’t like co-sleeping. I don’t sleep as well with the baby in the bed with me, I feel like the children have invaded a part of my life that should be just for me and my husband. I don’t mind all cuddling together in the morning, we do that. But the third person in the bed all the time is taxing. I don’t agree with this section at all but I see her “points” they just don’t work for my family.
4. Cow’s Milk: The sections on this were very interesting. I am lactose sensitive or have a milk allergy. I learned that real lactose intolerance is something a lot more serious than what I have. We don’t drink cow’s milk in our house. Since we buy a quart every two weeks for cooking, and use organic rice milk for everything else, we decided our son would just drink rice milk. It has the same nutrients because it’s fortified, he gets vitamins C and D and we buy fortified orange juice containing both as well. I’m not concerned about his nutrient intake. I was concerned about his body reacting to a milk allergy. It’s likely because I have one he would, and it’s painful. His liver and kidneys can be spared the extra work involved with digesting and breaking down all the extra minerals in cow’s milk that people don’t need. Not to mention all the other possible effects on his body and behavior that can come from milk allergies. I was shocked at the information about the milk industry and the formula industry who push for cow’s milk and cow’s milk products. It’s not that dissimilar to the tobacco industry but because it’s milk we don’t see it in the same light. The bottom line is that milk and other food allergies can be the basis for problems that often go undiagnosed or misdiagnosed for a long time causing serious damage to the body and brain. People were not meant to drink cow’s milk and cow’s were not meant to produce the amount of milk we consume, and the methods we use to continue the production are turning out to be harmful to us.
The author of this book is very passionate about what she writes because she had to find out this information on her own while dealing with a “problem” child (picky eater, poor sleeper, colicky baby, gassy baby etc). Her opinions are very strong at some points but she does back up a lot of her arguments with facts from studies. The studies come from all over the world because we are not the most forward thinking nation, when it comes to this area. The amount of good information in this book outweighs the annoying snobbish attitude of the author who makes you feel guilty for not doing everything she says (or was that just me?). When caring for our children the best we can do is be armed with information, and this book gives you a lot more to draw from if you have a “problem” child.
October 9, 2008
This could have easily been two separate books. The first half discussed the importance, mechanics and cultural predisposition away from parent/infant attachment. It was extremely interesting . Probably the biggest reason I liked it is that it totally reinforced decisions I made/make in parenting--most of them instinctively and often counter to popular 'guidelines' of today.
The second half of the book was primarily about allergies. Some of it got technical. I am blessed with two babies who aren't particularly food sensitive, or so I thought. She identifies some things that are possible allergic reactions and makes a valid case for figuring out what is causing them and not just ignoring them or treating the symptoms instead of the cause. She is extremely biased against cow's milk, but she offers extensive, meticulous research to support her argument. She does skimp a little on some of the things that I think are most harmful, like the overuse of corn (especially GM corn) and processed foods, but she does touch on this and even goes so far as to how to find some common allergens "hidden" in common foods.
In my opinion, this is a must-read for any parent.
The second half of the book was primarily about allergies. Some of it got technical. I am blessed with two babies who aren't particularly food sensitive, or so I thought. She identifies some things that are possible allergic reactions and makes a valid case for figuring out what is causing them and not just ignoring them or treating the symptoms instead of the cause. She is extremely biased against cow's milk, but she offers extensive, meticulous research to support her argument. She does skimp a little on some of the things that I think are most harmful, like the overuse of corn (especially GM corn) and processed foods, but she does touch on this and even goes so far as to how to find some common allergens "hidden" in common foods.
In my opinion, this is a must-read for any parent.
November 10, 2014
Interesants pētījumu kopums par piesaistes veidošanos mazajos bērnos, tā ietekmi turpmākajā dzīvē un psiholoģiskajā attīstībā. Daudzu pētījumu apkopojums par kopā gulēšanu, rokās nēsāšanu, samierināšanu, kad bērns raud. Īpaši daudz par barošanu, krūts barošanas plusiem, sauso maisījumu mīnusiem, ražotāju reklāmām utt. Arī par alerģijām un govs/kazu piena negatīvo ietekmi.
Valoda diezgan sausa, vietām gribētos, lai būtu vairāk padomu, ko darīt, un atbildes uz jautājumiem kā 'cik tad ilgi mans bērns dzīvosies man pa rokām?'. Bet tā nav grāmatas autores vaina, viņa brīdina uzreiz, ka sagatavojusi informācijas avotu, ko ar to darīt, ir katra vecāka paša lēmums.
Valoda diezgan sausa, vietām gribētos, lai būtu vairāk padomu, ko darīt, un atbildes uz jautājumiem kā 'cik tad ilgi mans bērns dzīvosies man pa rokām?'. Bet tā nav grāmatas autores vaina, viņa brīdina uzreiz, ka sagatavojusi informācijas avotu, ko ar to darīt, ir katra vecāka paša lēmums.
October 2, 2015
Baby Matters: What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Caring For Your Baby by natural childbirth educator Linda Folden Palmer provides a straightforward examination of many key issues new parents might be unfamiliar with, ranging from why cow's milk is not the best food for an infant, to preventing and treating food allergies, to the inside scoop on bonding.
Dr. Palmer, is an instructor in pediatric nutrition (among other health fields), and writes in "reader friendly", down-to-earth terms especially accessible to non-specialist readers in general, and anxious mothers in particular. Baby Matters is an excellent and highly recommended reader for the new mother!
Dr. Palmer, is an instructor in pediatric nutrition (among other health fields), and writes in "reader friendly", down-to-earth terms especially accessible to non-specialist readers in general, and anxious mothers in particular. Baby Matters is an excellent and highly recommended reader for the new mother!
Read
August 21, 2015"The Baby Bond" is out of print and has been re-released with its original title---it's now "Baby Matters, Revised 3rd Edition, What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Caring for Your Baby." This edition of "Baby Matters" is the same book as "The Baby Bond." With 1200 science journal references, "Baby Matters" brings the science evidence that supports natural parenting practices. Additionally, there's help for ear infections, food allergies, colic, reflux, and more.
See you in the bookstores!!
linda f. palmer, dc
See you in the bookstores!!
linda f. palmer, dc
February 21, 2014
This book gives ten billion reasons why you should breastfeed exclusively. Also some anti-elective-csection and co-sleeping infol.
Some interesting information about how most studies on breastfeeding and formula are paid for by the formula companies.
It's a heavy read, fairly cerebral. Read it if you are a voracious reader, but don't feel obligated if you are overwhelmed by other pregnancy reading.
Some interesting information about how most studies on breastfeeding and formula are paid for by the formula companies.
It's a heavy read, fairly cerebral. Read it if you are a voracious reader, but don't feel obligated if you are overwhelmed by other pregnancy reading.
January 12, 2012
I'm not really impressed. I thought this book would be about ways to ensure bonding and encouragement for breastfeeding. Instead, this book is very negative and extreme. I breastfeed my son, and although this book talks about the benefits of breastfeeding, it takes a more alarmist negative point of view on society as a whole. If your looking for a practical book about bonding with your baby, as the title suggests, this is not the book for you.
June 4, 2013
I strongly agree with the concepts and parenting methods presented in this book. However, the majority of the book focuses on the latest research on breast feeding presented in a list-like fashion. This style is a little too textbook-dry for me. I was hoping for more information on the value of "gentle" birth and attachment parenting. I will be reading "The Fourth Trimester" by Susan Brink, which promises to be more succinct and specific about bonding in the first three months of life.
June 13, 2008
Not my very favorite, but a good book with sound research. The information on allergies alone was worthwhile. I did not think it was particularly well laid-out, but I could forgive this. Her focus on nutrition was nice, as that seems to be missing in some of the other baby-related books I've perused.
March 4, 2012
A lot of interesting stuff in here, but there just seems to be a ton of good science mixed in with bad, and there isn't enough of an overall story, just page after page of arguments supporting whatever the point of a given chapter is. I'd like to follow up on some of the clinical trials that were pretty suggestive, but I guess we'll see.
Read
October 5, 2013"Baby Matters" has been embellished, updated, and re-released by a new publisher as "The Baby Bond." With 1200 science journal references, "The Baby Bond" brings you the solid evidence that supports natural, attachment, and healthy parenting choices. There's lots of info about breastfeeding, cosleeping, nutrition, colic, reflux, ear infections, food allergies, and more.
February 5, 2010
I appreciated the knowledge presented in this book. It did not fall in line with what doctors usually tell you. It did not "brush off" issues children may have (like doctors do) and provided medical facts which made sense to me.
December 1, 2010
Easily the most informative, well-researched book to help guide parenting decisions. Although limited in scope (mostly deals with responding to cues, dietary choices, and vaccines / supplementation), the topics discussed are extremely informative. Probably the best parenting book I've read so far.
May 17, 2010
If you have a baby or know someone who is going to have one, buy this book. It contains all the information I've been looking for on a variety of subjects. Some of what this book contains I've found through my own research, but there is so much valuable information in here!
February 4, 2008
This book seems to be akin to The Thinking Women's Guide to a Better Birth in that it is well-researched and not as "out there" as some other (well-loved) books on natural parenting.
July 27, 2009
I agree with 'most' of the information that was given in this affluent book on attachment parenting. It gave me valuable evidence based information with tons of references. I really liked it!
September 20, 2011
Good read about bonding after birth!
October 1, 2012
Very informative, definitely worth reading!
Read
August 21, 2015See the reviews under "Baby Matters, 2nd Ed.":
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4...
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4...
February 25, 2014
Interesting but had an agenda.
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews