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Cake or Death: The Excruciating Choices of Everyday Life
A brilliant new book from one of Canada’s most popular columnists – a no-holds-barred riposte to the mess we’ve made of things.
"Mrs. Tittlemouse is heaven in a sponge mop. I read Beatrix Potter’s books as a child and love her paintings, her stories, her home-boiling of squirrels so her watercolours could be anatomically exact. But most of all, Beatrix Potter made domesticity desirable. All right, she didn’t, but she domesticated me. Personal order has become my badge and it’s the only thing that really works with melancholy."
Heather Mallick is sorely disappointed. The world has not turned out quite the way she had hoped it would. But rather than retreat from it, she takes the world head on, fearlessly and formidably on her own terms.
In a new work of entirely original writing, we have Heather unplugged (some might even say unhinged), and uncensored from the restrictions of her Globe and Mail column writing. As her many fans have come to expect from her, she is incisive and outrageous, whether she’s cataloguing the many situations and items in our daily lives that we are told we should fear, teaching us how to cope with people we just can’t stand (ruthless mockery is the key, really, says Heather) or writing about the valuable life lesson to be learned from one of her childhood Mrs. Tittlemouse, the original domestic goddess.
A candid reflection on the complicated state of our lives and our world today, viewed through the lens of Heather’s inimitable wit and outlook on life, Cake or The Excruciating Choices of Everyday Life will provoke and delight readers.
"Mrs. Tittlemouse is heaven in a sponge mop. I read Beatrix Potter’s books as a child and love her paintings, her stories, her home-boiling of squirrels so her watercolours could be anatomically exact. But most of all, Beatrix Potter made domesticity desirable. All right, she didn’t, but she domesticated me. Personal order has become my badge and it’s the only thing that really works with melancholy."
Heather Mallick is sorely disappointed. The world has not turned out quite the way she had hoped it would. But rather than retreat from it, she takes the world head on, fearlessly and formidably on her own terms.
In a new work of entirely original writing, we have Heather unplugged (some might even say unhinged), and uncensored from the restrictions of her Globe and Mail column writing. As her many fans have come to expect from her, she is incisive and outrageous, whether she’s cataloguing the many situations and items in our daily lives that we are told we should fear, teaching us how to cope with people we just can’t stand (ruthless mockery is the key, really, says Heather) or writing about the valuable life lesson to be learned from one of her childhood Mrs. Tittlemouse, the original domestic goddess.
A candid reflection on the complicated state of our lives and our world today, viewed through the lens of Heather’s inimitable wit and outlook on life, Cake or The Excruciating Choices of Everyday Life will provoke and delight readers.
240 pages, Hardcover
First published April 10, 2007
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
April 5, 2020
I believe humans are all extraordinarily odd, and that's interesting. In life and in prose, it's good to interject a little strange. p2
The great British novelist and playwright John Mortimer ...(said) Covering pain with jokes is the only possible attitude...and he of course is right.p27
Heather Mallick goes out of her way, it seems, to be cranky, contrary, and too cute. She has a brisk attitude towards pain and her jokes are often painful.
I have spent hours on things that don't matter, although I know from the testimony of those who suffer from depression that the anguish of not doing these things far overweighs the boredom of doing them. p58
It's my dream to become a calm person. I have long known I will never achieve this dream, but now I can see that I won't even be able to build a facade. p122
I think she is trying to convey with these essays that these kind of insights make her a realist. Life is not tidy. What good is cake if you can't eat it? If she comes off a bit too often as crass, a name-dropper and meanspirited about bursting bubbles, a closer reading reveals a real tenderness for the loners and the losers and the misfits who have captured her heart. She sticks to her principles. Sometimes I even agree with her.
Maybe everything is an immense misunderstanding. Layers of lies upon lies upon mistakes upon misunderstandings form over the years like a coral bed building itself up. p157
we're too embarrassed to admit what a failure we are as a species. p16
Perhaps it's not so important if I can't decide if I like HM or hate her for a recent essay she wrote, not included in this book but immediately notorious, for her stance on PTSD. I'm glad she is out there, taking risks, thinking and challenging others to think, on the issues we may prefer not to. And some of her advice is downright comforting, as is the recipe for Ambrosia Cream Cake that she includes at the end of the book.
People shouldn't worry about disliking books widely accepted as great, or avoiding them for decades. They should wait for the stage when they are ready for the book, for it will come.p146
The great British novelist and playwright John Mortimer ...(said) Covering pain with jokes is the only possible attitude...and he of course is right.p27
Heather Mallick goes out of her way, it seems, to be cranky, contrary, and too cute. She has a brisk attitude towards pain and her jokes are often painful.
I have spent hours on things that don't matter, although I know from the testimony of those who suffer from depression that the anguish of not doing these things far overweighs the boredom of doing them. p58
It's my dream to become a calm person. I have long known I will never achieve this dream, but now I can see that I won't even be able to build a facade. p122
I think she is trying to convey with these essays that these kind of insights make her a realist. Life is not tidy. What good is cake if you can't eat it? If she comes off a bit too often as crass, a name-dropper and meanspirited about bursting bubbles, a closer reading reveals a real tenderness for the loners and the losers and the misfits who have captured her heart. She sticks to her principles. Sometimes I even agree with her.
Maybe everything is an immense misunderstanding. Layers of lies upon lies upon mistakes upon misunderstandings form over the years like a coral bed building itself up. p157
we're too embarrassed to admit what a failure we are as a species. p16
Perhaps it's not so important if I can't decide if I like HM or hate her for a recent essay she wrote, not included in this book but immediately notorious, for her stance on PTSD. I'm glad she is out there, taking risks, thinking and challenging others to think, on the issues we may prefer not to. And some of her advice is downright comforting, as is the recipe for Ambrosia Cream Cake that she includes at the end of the book.
People shouldn't worry about disliking books widely accepted as great, or avoiding them for decades. They should wait for the stage when they are ready for the book, for it will come.p146
January 27, 2015
Mallick is a very good writer, well read, highly successful in career and deeply in love with her husband, "S" (as she is so fond of reminding us); I bow down to her superior intellect. From my Cro-Magnon point of view, I find her sometimes amusing, but mostly rather annoying. What's up with the faux Brit accent? She's Canadian. Her opinions are carved in stone; she is inflexible, petrified; she excels at smug hatred. Ultimately comes off as a Champagne Socialist.
August 30, 2018
"Cake or Death" is a quirky title for any book. In someways, it's apposite for the thoughts and writing of Heather Mallick, a quirky Canadian journalist, who comments on daily life, hers, mainly, not necessarily as a lover of life but a critiquer and observer with some direct opinions.
Her style is easy to read, with a particular kind of self-disclosure, some sharp observations and a bit of humour thrown in. Sometimes her bluntness is startling, but it has its appeal and her sharpness is invariably astute.
I'd never heard of her until her name appeared in a list of books on offer and this book is interesting enough to want to read more of her work. I found it relaxing and an antidote to some books I'm ploughing through that are a little dense in their prose.
Read it by a fire, or some cosy environment.
Her style is easy to read, with a particular kind of self-disclosure, some sharp observations and a bit of humour thrown in. Sometimes her bluntness is startling, but it has its appeal and her sharpness is invariably astute.
I'd never heard of her until her name appeared in a list of books on offer and this book is interesting enough to want to read more of her work. I found it relaxing and an antidote to some books I'm ploughing through that are a little dense in their prose.
Read it by a fire, or some cosy environment.
August 29, 2020
3/5.
This collection of essays isn't something I'd typically pick up, but I enjoyed reading it. It was quirky, funny and occasionally macabre. The only reason why it didn't get a higher rating is because it was quite dated in some parts, and honestly, I don't really remember any of the essays in detail.
This collection of essays isn't something I'd typically pick up, but I enjoyed reading it. It was quirky, funny and occasionally macabre. The only reason why it didn't get a higher rating is because it was quite dated in some parts, and honestly, I don't really remember any of the essays in detail.
December 30, 2013
I used to enjoy Mallick's columns in Chatelaine magazine, and her pieces in the Guardian, so was very happy to see this in my local library. She's a Canadian journalist who has been in the news quite a bit for her no-holds barred thoughts on Americans (generally disapproving) and other personal irritations. These short acerbic essays were a perfect anecdote to the piles of mince pies and Christmas cake. She reminded me how much I loved Doris Lessing, the "Cake or Death" Eddie Izzard sketch and snarky, brainy women writing about travel, socialism and the importance of good grooming!
June 18, 2015
A work of essays on a number of subjects. She is outrageous, fearless, formidable and uncensored. Some of her subjects include: items in our daily lives we are told we should fear, coping with people we can't stand and learning valuable lessons from childhood heroes.
Provocative and delightful.
Provocative and delightful.
February 25, 2008
Though I love Heather Mallick's column (she makes me laugh out loud... and how often does print do that?), she doesn't really translate well to longer essays. That's ok, though. I'll just continue to read her column online, because it's still awesome.
June 28, 2010
Not as good as Pearls in Vinegar, which was beautiful.
September 26, 2011
This book is full of the author's personal opinions and stories. Cake or Death is a very fun and interesting read.
July 28, 2011
It took me a long time to warm up to this book - I didn't really enjoy it overall, but parts of it were ok, even good and I did finish it, but I probably won't seek her out again.
November 16, 2012
I just could not stay focused or get into this book. I have no clue what it is supposed to be about. Very hard to read. If you want an engrossing read, do not pick up this book.
October 19, 2014
Clever, funny, scathing essays from a fine Canadian snarkmaster.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews