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Hungry to Be Happy: How I Lost and Found My Mind
As a fourteen-year-old psych ward patient, Harry realised he had a choice: let anorexia keep ruining his life, or fight back against everything his mind told him was true.
Now twenty-two years old, Harry delicately pieces together how his mind derailed to that point, what’s happened since he made his choice, and most importantly, what it’s taught him about life and how best to live it.
Hungry to Be Happy is a story of survival against all odds, redemption from the depths of despair, and triumph over the most dangerous of bullies.
By reclaiming the space between his ears, Harry rediscovers what matters most, and through doing so, he experiences what anorexia always promised but could never deliver – happiness.
Now twenty-two years old, Harry delicately pieces together how his mind derailed to that point, what’s happened since he made his choice, and most importantly, what it’s taught him about life and how best to live it.
Hungry to Be Happy is a story of survival against all odds, redemption from the depths of despair, and triumph over the most dangerous of bullies.
By reclaiming the space between his ears, Harry rediscovers what matters most, and through doing so, he experiences what anorexia always promised but could never deliver – happiness.
183 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 3, 2023
4 people are currently reading
24 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
March 13, 2023
i literally read this book in one sitting - couldn't put it down! Harry does an incredible job of describing the intricacies of anorexia through a real, raw account of his sickness and recovery. This is a very well-written and insightful book, and it was interesting to hear his mum's objective perspective throughout. I resonated with so much of the book (actually, all of it - if you know, you know lol), and I applaud Harry's honesty and strength in putting into words what so many of us face in private. Harry, thank you for sharing your fight! xxx
Added bonus 5+++ star review from Yvonne (my mum).
Added bonus 5+++ star review from Yvonne (my mum).
May 20, 2023
Really brave account of how quickly and easy it can be to fall into an eating disorder. I think this will be very useful for young people to recognise their own distorted thoughts around eating and exercise and hopefully be able to ask for help a lot sooner. Can also be upsetting to read for someone already going through this. Helpful for parents or people supporting a young person in this situation.
February 24, 2023
This is an incredibly down to earth, real and inspiring book telling one young man's journey with anorexia. His reflections and insights into the thought processes and beliefs behind this are astounding, and I am sure that through his writing and his perspective, others will benefit greatly. Thank you Harry, for sharing your story. It is powerful.
March 14, 2023
Amazing and inspiring book. Harry shares his tough journey with anorexia and gives amazing life advice throughout. I would recommend this book to anyone suffering with mental illness or if you want to try and gain some understanding for those going through it themselves. Harry thank you for being so raw and sharing this with all of us.
June 23, 2025
From reading this book, I learnt about the power of the mind. While our brains can trick and manipulate us into rock bottom, we can also learn how to use that same power to build ourselves back up stronger than before.
The autobiography Hungry To Be Happy, written by former Napier Boys High School student Harry Averill, depicts the life of a young student athlete suffering from severe anorexia. For the first half of the story, when Harry is just starting his high school journey in the hostel, I learned about the mind as a source of control and destruction. Averill quotes, “The mind–the most dangerous of bullies.” This quote reinforces how self-destructive behaviours are rooted in our mind, having been taken over by negative thoughts. Harry is trying to signal throughout the book how important it is not to always listen to your inner critic. It is so fascinating to me how our brain can tell us so many things. Sometimes it may seem like a game, but when you make one wrong move, it can lead to a horrible fate. The mind comes from a place of constant self-criticism and obsessive control. Decisions can sometimes no longer be our free choices, but rules we have enforced on ourselves through a personal fear. Mental illness is a mastermind manipulator. It can make harmful behaviour feel rational and, in extreme cases, exceedingly necessary. British gymnast Ellie Downie has spoken openly about how her desire to meet strict weight and performance standards led to disordered eating. Like Harry, she internalised a voice telling her thinner meant better, and it wasn’t until it began seriously affecting her health and performance that she realised her mind had been hijacked. Downie, just like Averill, demonstrates to readers how important it is to understand that causes and threats are not always from our surroundings, but most unexpectedly, planted in something inside of us. Our minds reflect what we feed them. When we starve it of compassion, it becomes cruel, and this is how our mind is a source of control and destruction.
While the mind has the strong power to drag us into the darkness, it also holds the same potential to lift us out and create a positive journey. As the book goes on, Harry realises the cost and effect his thoughts have had on him. The short amount of time that his brain had deteriorated had shocked him. It wasn't until he was at his lowest point that he realised it was time to reclaim mental space for healing. The reason why recovery takes so long is that so many people struggle to understand that this inner voice isn't theirs in the first place. The mind has manipulated them into thinking that the disorder aligns with their values, when in fact, it is encouraging something completely different. Throughout the story, Harry tells us recovery starts when you realise you need to separate yourself from the harmful inner voice. Averill talks about "reclaiming the space between my ears." He is telling us that healing begins when one takes control of thoughts in their mental space. What people need to realise is that their thoughts are not always the truth. This parallels the experience of author Matt Haig. In his book Reasons to Stay Alive, he discusses learning not to believe everything his mind tells him. Like Harry, Matt reclaimed his mental space by recognising that intrusive thoughts were symptoms, not truths. Mental strength is completely invisible. There is no applause, no medals, no scoreboard. Surviving a war in your own head and still choosing to heal is one of the most heroic things one can do. Secretly, so many people are silently doing this every day. Maybe this loneliness in succeeding is what our brain knows deep down, which is why it chooses to manipulate us into further darkness. However, it is only up to us to see a new light and realise we have the power to turn things around.
The mind is complicated, and so many people struggle to understand it. Even though we spend our whole lives with the same one, we always underestimate its true power. From reading Hungry To Be Happy, I learnt about the mind as a source of control or destruction, and reclaiming mental space for healing. The same thing that made Harry fall deep into Anorexia was also the same thing that made him recover and come out the other end ten times stronger. We can either neglect the power of the mind or take the time to understand it and use it as a tool. It's fascinating to me that everyone has a brain, but only a small percentage of society chooses to use it as an asset. The mind is the only battlefield in history where you play both the soldier and the enemy. Winning this battle doesn't come down to silencing the mind, but allowing yourself to learn how to work alongside it. You have to turn that voice that once broke you into the one that builds you back up. To grow our society, we must understand the mind's power. By doing this, we will win our personal wars that are fought every day. Using our brains as a tool to harness the power will better our society in so many ways. It encourages critical thinking, uplifting politics and education. It builds emotional intelligence, allowing us to empathise and communicate effectively. This realisation utilises creativity through major events like climate change and poverty. Thus, encapuring the power of the mind allows us to think clearly and create solutions, all of which push our society forward.
The autobiography Hungry To Be Happy, written by former Napier Boys High School student Harry Averill, depicts the life of a young student athlete suffering from severe anorexia. For the first half of the story, when Harry is just starting his high school journey in the hostel, I learned about the mind as a source of control and destruction. Averill quotes, “The mind–the most dangerous of bullies.” This quote reinforces how self-destructive behaviours are rooted in our mind, having been taken over by negative thoughts. Harry is trying to signal throughout the book how important it is not to always listen to your inner critic. It is so fascinating to me how our brain can tell us so many things. Sometimes it may seem like a game, but when you make one wrong move, it can lead to a horrible fate. The mind comes from a place of constant self-criticism and obsessive control. Decisions can sometimes no longer be our free choices, but rules we have enforced on ourselves through a personal fear. Mental illness is a mastermind manipulator. It can make harmful behaviour feel rational and, in extreme cases, exceedingly necessary. British gymnast Ellie Downie has spoken openly about how her desire to meet strict weight and performance standards led to disordered eating. Like Harry, she internalised a voice telling her thinner meant better, and it wasn’t until it began seriously affecting her health and performance that she realised her mind had been hijacked. Downie, just like Averill, demonstrates to readers how important it is to understand that causes and threats are not always from our surroundings, but most unexpectedly, planted in something inside of us. Our minds reflect what we feed them. When we starve it of compassion, it becomes cruel, and this is how our mind is a source of control and destruction.
While the mind has the strong power to drag us into the darkness, it also holds the same potential to lift us out and create a positive journey. As the book goes on, Harry realises the cost and effect his thoughts have had on him. The short amount of time that his brain had deteriorated had shocked him. It wasn't until he was at his lowest point that he realised it was time to reclaim mental space for healing. The reason why recovery takes so long is that so many people struggle to understand that this inner voice isn't theirs in the first place. The mind has manipulated them into thinking that the disorder aligns with their values, when in fact, it is encouraging something completely different. Throughout the story, Harry tells us recovery starts when you realise you need to separate yourself from the harmful inner voice. Averill talks about "reclaiming the space between my ears." He is telling us that healing begins when one takes control of thoughts in their mental space. What people need to realise is that their thoughts are not always the truth. This parallels the experience of author Matt Haig. In his book Reasons to Stay Alive, he discusses learning not to believe everything his mind tells him. Like Harry, Matt reclaimed his mental space by recognising that intrusive thoughts were symptoms, not truths. Mental strength is completely invisible. There is no applause, no medals, no scoreboard. Surviving a war in your own head and still choosing to heal is one of the most heroic things one can do. Secretly, so many people are silently doing this every day. Maybe this loneliness in succeeding is what our brain knows deep down, which is why it chooses to manipulate us into further darkness. However, it is only up to us to see a new light and realise we have the power to turn things around.
The mind is complicated, and so many people struggle to understand it. Even though we spend our whole lives with the same one, we always underestimate its true power. From reading Hungry To Be Happy, I learnt about the mind as a source of control or destruction, and reclaiming mental space for healing. The same thing that made Harry fall deep into Anorexia was also the same thing that made him recover and come out the other end ten times stronger. We can either neglect the power of the mind or take the time to understand it and use it as a tool. It's fascinating to me that everyone has a brain, but only a small percentage of society chooses to use it as an asset. The mind is the only battlefield in history where you play both the soldier and the enemy. Winning this battle doesn't come down to silencing the mind, but allowing yourself to learn how to work alongside it. You have to turn that voice that once broke you into the one that builds you back up. To grow our society, we must understand the mind's power. By doing this, we will win our personal wars that are fought every day. Using our brains as a tool to harness the power will better our society in so many ways. It encourages critical thinking, uplifting politics and education. It builds emotional intelligence, allowing us to empathise and communicate effectively. This realisation utilises creativity through major events like climate change and poverty. Thus, encapuring the power of the mind allows us to think clearly and create solutions, all of which push our society forward.
July 13, 2023
This book is absolutely amazing for so many reasons.
Firstly, It’s written by a local boy, he was head boy at Napier Boys High School a few years ago. I’m always keen to support a local writer. Secondly it’s about mental health, in particular mental health in relation to boys, which is super important. The story starts when Harry Averill turns 14 and starts high school. Harry makes a conscious decision that’s it’s time to grow up and start his journey to success! Harry never realised that this positive mindset, and his strength and determination, would almost end his life.
His struggles with anorexia over a year are horrendous and every parent’s nightmare. The daily turmoil from the devil in his head constantly guilting him to not eat, are absolutely heartbreaking. As a parent of a 14 year old sports mad boy it’s awful to see what pressure to perform can do to someone’s mind.
Harry is the middle child of three boys. He had a happy childhood, has amazing parents and grandparents, a normal family just like ours. It drives home the reality that mental health and anorexia can happen to anyone.
Not only is Harry a bloody superstar beating this horrific disease, he fights hard and he lives to finish year 13 as head boy at Napier Boys High School. He bravely tells his story to 1,200 impressionable young men in a school assembly. Not only does Harry talk about his personal fight with mental illness he encourages others to step up, talk about your “mind health” and support your mates.
This book expelled a few false ideas I had about anorexia and because of Harry’s writing style I felt like I could truly understand the hold it had on him. I cannot imagine the hell his family went through, his parents and grandparents never gave up the fight to get Harry the professional help he needed, and they supported him every step of the way.
Harry continued his education after Napier Boys and graduated with a degree in economics and psychology, he then wrote an exceptional book. It is so well written that you really feel like you get a glimpse of the power of an eating disorder can hold over a person.
I’m so glad that Harry survived to tell his story, it’s a powerful one that will help a lot of people. Thanks Harry Averill for sharing your personal journey with us.
As a parent, I choose happiness for my kids over success, and I hope they will too.
Firstly, It’s written by a local boy, he was head boy at Napier Boys High School a few years ago. I’m always keen to support a local writer. Secondly it’s about mental health, in particular mental health in relation to boys, which is super important. The story starts when Harry Averill turns 14 and starts high school. Harry makes a conscious decision that’s it’s time to grow up and start his journey to success! Harry never realised that this positive mindset, and his strength and determination, would almost end his life.
His struggles with anorexia over a year are horrendous and every parent’s nightmare. The daily turmoil from the devil in his head constantly guilting him to not eat, are absolutely heartbreaking. As a parent of a 14 year old sports mad boy it’s awful to see what pressure to perform can do to someone’s mind.
Harry is the middle child of three boys. He had a happy childhood, has amazing parents and grandparents, a normal family just like ours. It drives home the reality that mental health and anorexia can happen to anyone.
Not only is Harry a bloody superstar beating this horrific disease, he fights hard and he lives to finish year 13 as head boy at Napier Boys High School. He bravely tells his story to 1,200 impressionable young men in a school assembly. Not only does Harry talk about his personal fight with mental illness he encourages others to step up, talk about your “mind health” and support your mates.
This book expelled a few false ideas I had about anorexia and because of Harry’s writing style I felt like I could truly understand the hold it had on him. I cannot imagine the hell his family went through, his parents and grandparents never gave up the fight to get Harry the professional help he needed, and they supported him every step of the way.
Harry continued his education after Napier Boys and graduated with a degree in economics and psychology, he then wrote an exceptional book. It is so well written that you really feel like you get a glimpse of the power of an eating disorder can hold over a person.
I’m so glad that Harry survived to tell his story, it’s a powerful one that will help a lot of people. Thanks Harry Averill for sharing your personal journey with us.
As a parent, I choose happiness for my kids over success, and I hope they will too.
February 21, 2023
Best read of the year! Harry does an incredible job of explaining the intricacies and ugly truths of anorexia, how he overcame his struggles with the disease and returned to the happy person he was before. Such an impressive feat to write a book about something no person should ever have to go through - and Harry does it with empathy for himself and with his author in mind.
April 1, 2023
Anorexia in a male - NZ writer attempts to raise awareness that it not only occurs in females, the subtlety of the disease and the long road back. He nearly died. A very current memoir with quotes from his parents and their journey, - also comments from his brothers.
An illuminating and modern take.
An illuminating and modern take.
July 30, 2023
Incredible read! It is real talent to write about such difficult subject matter in a way that makes it so easy to consume and digest as a reader. I read hungry to be happy entirely in one sitting, had my heart broken and then mended along the way.
January 21, 2024
Unbelievable read, you simply can't coach the wisdom found between the covers of this book. Mr. Averill is a great author - don't be surprised if he begins to rival Rowling in sales.
February 8, 2023
10/10 read. A raw and real insight about a young boy’s battle with, and recovery from anorexia, and how it has affected his life going forwards. Valuable lessons to be learned from this gripping, insightful, and extremely well-written autobiography. Warning: hard to put down once picked up
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews