To be fair, I expected to give this novel only one star, so it’s safe to say that in some aspects I respect its ending compared to the rest of the novel.
If this weren’t a memoir, then I would’ve enjoyed it more. The writing style may not be for me, but I can appreciate an anti-hero, a protagonist rough around the edges and with little to no redeeming qualities. But the very fact that this novel contains the experiences of a real person, one who cheats on every girlfriend he has multiple times AND throws around slurs of all kinds like they mean nothing, inclines me to dislike our main character, the author.
The reason for this stems from the fact that in a regular novel, it’s common for a troubled character to lack remorse for his actions, especially when they aren’t relevant to the plot. Since this is a real person, it concerns me to read stories of his past without any condemnation of these deeds. For instance, after cheating on his girlfriend and impregnating another woman, he portrays little regard for HIS child, barely referring to this baby again and in fact implying that it is HER child at one point, removing any connections he has with the two-person activity of having a kid. And still, this is only one of many instances.
The reason for the second star lies within this edition’s final chapter and the afterward. The final chapter recounts an experience Thomas has while on a parole, witnessing an old friend shooting up the heroine that the author himself once used. In this moment, he is conflicted, the desire of his addiction calling to him once more, but he ultimately steps away from the situation and remains clean. This end to the novel finally portrays a level of growth for Thomas, and a seeming conclusion to not only a physical battle with addiction but a mental one. In this manner, I possess much respect for the author.
The afterword serves as a call to arms for readers, demanding reform towards those - specifically children - suffering from issues like poverty and discrimination. He calls out the wealthy in the United States whom hoard most of the money, and insists that the best weapon for the poor is education, among other things.
While I may lack respect for his actions, I appreciate witnessing an author utilizing us power for the better. I feel that while he may not address his personal life, he does address the social issues which created many of the problems he experienced as a Puerto Rican American growing up among issues of racism, impoverishment, and the ultimate question of his racial identity.