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Empire State
It's bad enough having a name like Nathan Jones - unless you're a Supremes fan, which Nathan isn't - but when his girlfriend leaves him (for a drag artist) and he gets mugged, then handcuffed to a bed and cut up in a misunderstanding with an S&M hooker, can things get any worse?
512 pages, Paperback
First published January 5, 1997
4 people are currently reading
111 people want to read
About the author
Colin Bateman
77 books351 followersColin Bateman was a journalist in Northern Ireland before becoming a full-time writer. His first novel, Divorcing Jack, won the Betty Trask Prize, and all his novels have been critically acclaimed. He wrote the screenplays for the feature films of Divorcing Jack, Crossmaheart and Wild About Harry. He lives in Northern Ireland with his family.
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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
August 2, 2024
Read this a long time ago and enjoyed it. It was a decent enough re-read, though it’s not my favourite of his books. On the plus side, it’s fast-paced with some fun dialogue. There are some great one-liners in here.
However, there are issues mainly around the premise and plotting.
The premise at its simplest level is about a Northern Irish security guard called Nathan Jones. He lives in New York where his girlfriend, Lisa has just dumped him and run off. He works at the Empire State Building and when the US president visits for a function, he decides on the spur of the moment to take him hostage to win his girlfriend back. While it is set up that he’s been drinking before he does this, and that he’s not much of a planner, it’s pretty far-fetched that (a) he could even do this and (b) he could do it without any idea about what he’ll do afterwards.
Thrown into the mix is an actual right-wing nut job assassin out to kill the president who’s at the event when Nathan grabs the president. He’s kept hostage too. He does this while pretending to be a (black) journalist, wearing theatrical make-up to disguise himself. While plotting how to fire poison darts at the president through a straw.
You’d just about accept this far-fetched plot because of the humour in the story. However, then there’s almost another half of the story that’s darker and to be honest, less interesting.
For example, the disguised assassin brutally kills several people on his journey to target the President, and he’s never really held to account for this.
You get the story of Nathan and Lisa’s (his girlfriend) break-up. Though we discover there is an event in his past which would cause him some mental issues, his bad temper and his self-centredness make it hard to like him as a character at any point. Lisa escapes off to Cape Cod, and we get a whole story of her almost finding a better life there with someone else before Nathan’s hostage situation screws up her chances of future happiness.
There are also a lot of loose ends and weird secondary plots e.g. the President’s wife trying to seduce his Chief of Staff to get pregnant. Plus, the new owner of the Empire State Building, a billionaire tech geek with ideas to bring down the US economy and society. And one of the other security guys trying to cope with paying his elderly wife’s medical / care bills.
The background implied racism and homophobia in some of the characters isn’t particularly fun to read either. It maybe sets them up as characters but it feels weird to have them next to all the jokes and funny lines.
Part of the messiness of the book is that it couldn’t seem to decide whether it was a tense drama (the hostage situation) or a light comedy thriller (there are lots of wise-cracking and subtle jokes e.g. a secondary FBI agent called Mulder). It’s not totally off-putting, but it doesn’t quite hit the mark on either.
Overall, his books are always worth a read, but this is less enjoyable than some of his others.
However, there are issues mainly around the premise and plotting.
The premise at its simplest level is about a Northern Irish security guard called Nathan Jones. He lives in New York where his girlfriend, Lisa has just dumped him and run off. He works at the Empire State Building and when the US president visits for a function, he decides on the spur of the moment to take him hostage to win his girlfriend back. While it is set up that he’s been drinking before he does this, and that he’s not much of a planner, it’s pretty far-fetched that (a) he could even do this and (b) he could do it without any idea about what he’ll do afterwards.
Thrown into the mix is an actual right-wing nut job assassin out to kill the president who’s at the event when Nathan grabs the president. He’s kept hostage too. He does this while pretending to be a (black) journalist, wearing theatrical make-up to disguise himself. While plotting how to fire poison darts at the president through a straw.
You’d just about accept this far-fetched plot because of the humour in the story. However, then there’s almost another half of the story that’s darker and to be honest, less interesting.
For example, the disguised assassin brutally kills several people on his journey to target the President, and he’s never really held to account for this.
You get the story of Nathan and Lisa’s (his girlfriend) break-up. Though we discover there is an event in his past which would cause him some mental issues, his bad temper and his self-centredness make it hard to like him as a character at any point. Lisa escapes off to Cape Cod, and we get a whole story of her almost finding a better life there with someone else before Nathan’s hostage situation screws up her chances of future happiness.
There are also a lot of loose ends and weird secondary plots e.g. the President’s wife trying to seduce his Chief of Staff to get pregnant. Plus, the new owner of the Empire State Building, a billionaire tech geek with ideas to bring down the US economy and society. And one of the other security guys trying to cope with paying his elderly wife’s medical / care bills.
The background implied racism and homophobia in some of the characters isn’t particularly fun to read either. It maybe sets them up as characters but it feels weird to have them next to all the jokes and funny lines.
Part of the messiness of the book is that it couldn’t seem to decide whether it was a tense drama (the hostage situation) or a light comedy thriller (there are lots of wise-cracking and subtle jokes e.g. a secondary FBI agent called Mulder). It’s not totally off-putting, but it doesn’t quite hit the mark on either.
Overall, his books are always worth a read, but this is less enjoyable than some of his others.
November 23, 2017
Colin Bateman has been writing for a good length of time now and his style has matured over the years. He has always balanced darkness with light, often by having gruesome murders, but very funny main characters. His earliest works were perhaps his darkest, but the setting of Northern Ireland seemed to give the books a reprieve. Surely bad things happened during the troubles? How would Bateman’s dark comedic crime thrillers work if the setting was moved? Not quite as well as it turns out.
Nathan Jones is an illegal immigrant. He and his equally illegal girlfriend have made their way to New York from Northern Ireland and have to work some of the less favoured jobs to get by. Lisa has found herself dancing for money, but Nathan has managed to luck a job as a security guard in the Empire State Building. This normally entails babysitting tourists, but when the President announces a visit, the security team are put on high alert. After all, a known psychopath is out to get the President and the Empire State Building may just be the perfect place for an assassination.
The characters in Bateman’s novels are often flawed and not always that nice, but have some sort of redeeming feature – snide comments being the most common. The characters in ‘Empire State’ do not. The focus of the book is Nathan and he is the least likable character that Bateman has ever chosen to be the protagonist. We are used to lazy drunks, but women beaters? It is hard to side with Nathan. The likes of Lucy are a little better, but her story is not painted in glory either.
The entire experience of ‘Empire’ is a little grim. The killer on the loose seems to butcher people for little reason, but at least this gives the book some menace. However, there are also other dark parts that have seemingly no other purpose than to depress the reader. To be fair, this is in keeping with Bateman’s other early works, but the likes of ‘Cycle of Violence’ had Northern Ireland as a setting and it seemed to make more sense. In America, the book is cartoonish, even out doing the likes of Carl Hiaasen.
Throughout the story there are glimpses of the author’s better work. Some of the jokes are dark, but very funny. The tension that builds is also good as the killer is someone to be very scared of. A shame then that the ending becomes a little lampoonish. I see ‘Empire’ as a book from a newer writer finding their feet. There are several exceptional books in the Colin Bateman cannon, but this is not one of them. A decent enough outing, but only for readers with a strong stomach.
Nathan Jones is an illegal immigrant. He and his equally illegal girlfriend have made their way to New York from Northern Ireland and have to work some of the less favoured jobs to get by. Lisa has found herself dancing for money, but Nathan has managed to luck a job as a security guard in the Empire State Building. This normally entails babysitting tourists, but when the President announces a visit, the security team are put on high alert. After all, a known psychopath is out to get the President and the Empire State Building may just be the perfect place for an assassination.
The characters in Bateman’s novels are often flawed and not always that nice, but have some sort of redeeming feature – snide comments being the most common. The characters in ‘Empire State’ do not. The focus of the book is Nathan and he is the least likable character that Bateman has ever chosen to be the protagonist. We are used to lazy drunks, but women beaters? It is hard to side with Nathan. The likes of Lucy are a little better, but her story is not painted in glory either.
The entire experience of ‘Empire’ is a little grim. The killer on the loose seems to butcher people for little reason, but at least this gives the book some menace. However, there are also other dark parts that have seemingly no other purpose than to depress the reader. To be fair, this is in keeping with Bateman’s other early works, but the likes of ‘Cycle of Violence’ had Northern Ireland as a setting and it seemed to make more sense. In America, the book is cartoonish, even out doing the likes of Carl Hiaasen.
Throughout the story there are glimpses of the author’s better work. Some of the jokes are dark, but very funny. The tension that builds is also good as the killer is someone to be very scared of. A shame then that the ending becomes a little lampoonish. I see ‘Empire’ as a book from a newer writer finding their feet. There are several exceptional books in the Colin Bateman cannon, but this is not one of them. A decent enough outing, but only for readers with a strong stomach.
December 21, 2021
This may be Colin Bateman's best so far. Nathan Young, and illegal from Ireland is not a sterling character. He drifts here and there wondering what life is doing to him. He lands a job as a security guard at the Empire State Building and the President of the United States is coming to visit. In true Bateman fashion, a presidential assassin gets usurped by Nathan through a comedy of errors. Bateman's books just don't stand up to synopsis. You just have to go there yourself and you should - really. He's a twisted tale teller for sure.
December 30, 2019
Bateman always delivers. With this one just a little less than usually, not because of the story or writing but because some of the characters were just too horrible, and the way their chapters were written were just a bit too much. More than was needed to understand, so it felt a little over-indulgent. Still a great story, fantastic time as always with Bateman, never get less than that.
January 26, 2020
I like this book. It's funny and witty. Peole with great sense of humour would definitely love this book 😊.
There's so many characters in this book and I am amaze at how the writter link the characters together into a one story line.
There's so many characters in this book and I am amaze at how the writter link the characters together into a one story line.
February 3, 2021
Great read
This a great story. It is certainly the darkest story I've read from the author. I wasn't expecting that. I laughed and got angry and wanted more at the ending of the story. I loved it.
This a great story. It is certainly the darkest story I've read from the author. I wasn't expecting that. I laughed and got angry and wanted more at the ending of the story. I loved it.
May 31, 2017
Suspend credulity and laugh out loud
Read
October 18, 2020The humour is very dark....but SO funny.
January 18, 2021
Very easy reading comic caper
August 27, 2025
funny book
June 22, 2015
Unfortunately I didn't enjoy this book as much as I was expecting, I tend to prefer Bateman's Dan Starkey novels but Empire State is not as funny as Maid of the Mist or his other American set novels.
Midway through Empire State I found myself disliking most of the lead characters which made the book a harder read, I especially found reading the George sections to be horrific. However the most important issue was that I wasn't laughing anywhere near as much as I expected.
Midway through Empire State I found myself disliking most of the lead characters which made the book a harder read, I especially found reading the George sections to be horrific. However the most important issue was that I wasn't laughing anywhere near as much as I expected.
June 4, 2012
Yet another Colin Bateman novel... took me a bit longer to get into than the Dan Starkey or Mystery Man books by Colin. But a page turner once I got into it. Sadly it means that I only have 2 Bateman novels left to read.
It was rather funny that the book revolves around a US president who is black and Obama is currently in office. Made it more fun to read.
It was rather funny that the book revolves around a US president who is black and Obama is currently in office. Made it more fun to read.
January 4, 2014
Bateman was ahead of his time with this satirical crime novel abiut the attempt to assainate the black president of the USA. As always with Bateman there's a lot of satire and punk rock throughout the book. I loved it.
August 16, 2014
I say read Divorcing Jack, then read this, then...just move on to another author. No offense to this one.
Read
December 23, 2007to-read
November 21, 2008
This crime caper was one I picked up in London. It was terrible. I can't believe I bothered to finish it.
December 28, 2010
brilliant book
August 3, 2011
Absolute riot - was the first Bateman I read and became an instant fan.
Give it a go!
Give it a go!
March 25, 2012
Purely brilliant. Dark humour at its finest. Superbly written and laugh out loud hilarious
December 17, 2012
sick, but great fun!
March 21, 2015
not his best overlong and a bit silly
May 8, 2014
I loved it! 4.5 stars
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews