A Wayne in a Manger

by Gervase Phinn

A Wayne in a Manger is the hilarious compilation of nativity stories by Gervase Phinn. Discover some wonderfully funny and touching nativity play anecdotes, including children forgetting their lines, ad-libbing, falling of the stage, picking their noses and showing their knickers. One brilliant anecdote tells of an innkeeper who generously says there's plenty of room for Mary and Joseph, while another child, jealous of Joseph's starring role, allows Mary to come in but not Joseph, who can 'push off' ... There's the baby Jesus who suddenly pipes up with 'My name is Tammy, are you my Mommy?' and funniest of all, Mary who tells Joseph, 'I'm having a baby - oh and it's not yours'. Gervase Phinn's A Wayne in a Manger is the perfect gift this Christmas. 'Gervase Phinn's memoirs have made him a hero in school staff-rooms' Daily Telegraph Gervase Phinn is an author and educator from Rotherham who, after teaching for fourteen years in a variety of schools, moved to North Yorkshire to be a school inspector. He has written autobiographies, novels, plays, collections of poetry and stories, as well as a number of books about education. He holds five fellowships, honorary doctorates from Hull, Leicester and Sheffield Hallam universities, and is a patron of a number of children's charities and organizations. He is married with four adult children. His books include The Other Side of the Dale, Over Hill and Dale, Head Over Heels in the Dales, The Heart of the Dales, Up and Down in the Dales and Trouble at the Little Village School.

Genres: Humor, Christmas, Nonfiction, Memoir, Childrens, Anthologies, Religion

160 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

About the author

Gervase Phinn (born 27 December 1946, Rotherham, South Yorkshire, England) is an English author and educator. After a career as a teacher he became a schools inspector.

He is now a freelance lecturer, broadcaster and writer, a consultant for the Open University, Honorary Fellow of St. John's College, York, Doctor of Letters (D.Litt) of the University of Leicester, Doctor of Letters (D.Litt) of The University of Hull and the Fellow and Visiting Professor of Education at The University of Teesside.

In 2005 the highest academic award of Sheffield Hallam University, Doctor of the University (D.Univ.) was conferred upon him by the Chancellor, Professor Lord Robert Winston. In 2006 he became President of The School Library Association.

He has published five volumes of memoir, collections of poetry and a number of books about education. He has a particular interest in children's literature and literacy.
He is married with four grown-up children.

Reviews

[Sophie Crane · Rating 4 out of 5]

Probably the funniest Christmas book you could buy yourself or anyone else - better still it's all true because it has come from the mouths of children - and if you want to know the truth ask a child. Nothing tops these books - Twinkle Twinkle little star is also an absolute must and I will guarantee that you will be crying tears of laughter with either and both of these books. Gervaise Phinn has an incredible way with words and paints not just pictures but masterpieces of both humour and reality within these pages. He has the ability to both touch your heart and your funny bone simultaneously and at times almost move you to tears (and not always with laughter). All of his books are just so funny but when it comes to Christmas nothing comes close to this. It's a fabulous present for anyone including yourself. Add it to your collection and you can be guaranteed laughter every year, whatever the weather and whoever you are.

[Sophie Narey (Bookreview- aholic) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a hilarious read , perfect for this time of year for some holiday cheer!

This book features some of the hilarious things around Christmas and nativity play that Gervase Phinn experienced while being a school inspector! The range of thing that he has seen and heard is vast, there is definitely atleast one story that will make you laugh and that you can identify with whether it's because you are a teacher, parent or you remember from your childhood.

The book has a sprinkling of illustrations that compliments the book , it is fast flowing in short little chapters. The book might not take long to read but it certainly stays with you for a long time!

[Cindy · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you've ever been to a school Nativity pageant, you know the kids can be right unpredictable, often with hilarious consequences. Gervase Phinn was the Inspector of English in the Yorkshire Dales, and saw more than his share of Nativity pageants. This little book is the retelling of the best and funniest of those moments.

This was a gift from my English mother-in-law a few years back, and it makes me chuckle even on re-reads. He frequently captures the Yorkshire dialect, such as one of the shepherds saying upon seeing Jesus in the manger, "By the heck, 'e's an 'andsome little feller!"

And how about the little girl who hearing that there was no room for Joseph and Mary at the Inn rightfully pointed out "Well, they should 'ave booked in advance. It allus gets busy at Christmas."

[Ted · Rating 1 out of 5]

Sadly,as my daughter found out after she had bought a copy as a christmas present for my partner, this is no more than a collection of christmas themed stories culled from Gervase Finn's other books and whilst still amusing is not worth buying if you have his other books.

[Seb · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Once upon a time there was a man called Joseph and a lady called Mary and they were friends and they played games together and they had fun.”

A brilliantly funny compilation of nativity stories and Christmas anecdotes. Well put together and compiled brilliantly, probably the funniest Christmas book I’ve read. Well worth a read.

[Tilly_2009 · Rating 3 out of 5]

I it was quite funny but I ended up not really liking it because it got very boring in the end so I seven to tenAnd also I’ll give it three stars is funny how everybody just going to mess at the end of the nativity it was quite hilarious

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a wonderful little book! Mr Phinn was a Christian schools inspector in Yorkshire. This is a collection of some of the funny stories he had visiting schools around Christmas time. Just what did the angel say when the star fell from above onto his head? How did Joseph explain turning up at the inn with a pregnant Mary? And what is that song called again... you know, the one they make the children sing every year? You will laugh all the way through this book. It is simply lovely. Christmas, as seen through the eyes of children.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another classic series of tales from the mouths of babes. This time, Gervase Phinn has compiled a book of tales from nativity and other Christmas-time plays which are funny, poigniant, and sometimes sad, but never fail to make you smile, laugh and cry. A fantastic little book which should be re-read every December, when the Christmas rush starts to stress you out. Sit down with a mug of coffee, a few biscuits and read this for an hour - it's the perfect pick-me up.

[Bex · Rating 3 out of 5]

A light hearted look at Christmas nativities from across Phinn's career as an inspector. It's a collection of brief memories from the many schools he visited in Yorkshire over several years and makes you smile with the warmth of children trying to do the show.

[Anna Branson · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book in a day but still enjoyed it. It proves how much children change and develop and become more mature. Apart from this, it made me laugh out loud!

[Ethan Billington · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was really good because it was short with about 130 pages and it was really existing to read .there was one page were it was nearly all slang.♥️♥️love it.amaizing❣️

[John Naylor · Rating 3 out of 5]

A short collection of amusing Christmas and Navitity stories about the life of a Yorkshire school inspector and the children he has met.

It was enjoyable and humourous but not a book I will remember anything of in a few weeks. A light and light-hearted read that just about anyone could enjoy.

[Ritu Bhathal · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lovely book filled with anecdotes about the funny things children do and say, centred around Christmas and the Nativity. It spoke volumes to me, especially as an Early Years Teacher!

[Lyn Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

so funny.
as a mother of five and a long term childminder I have often enjoyed chats with youngsters, these accounts of how a child views the Christmas story was jocular and heartwarming.

[Nicki · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cute, touching and very funny. The school nativity will never be the same.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked this book because it was funny. But at the end I didn't really understand it.

[Sue · Rating 3 out of 5]

Much of the book contains stories or anecdotes that have already been used in some of the author’s other books, somewhat embellished, and few of them were memorable enough for me to have remembered them. The only one that felt familiar was the opening story about a hapless Vicar trying to tell the nativity story to a class of small and enthusiastic children. The punch-line is unfortunately foreshadowed in the title of the book, but it was still a pleasant read.

Other stories, each one only a few pages long, detail events in the Christmas period, or describe classroom nativity plays, where mistakes, misunderstandings and general cuteness feature prominently. I was mildly amused, and appreciated the glimpses into environments which are mostly unfamiliar to me.

It's a quick read; at less than 150 pages I completed it in about an hour, and it fulfilled my requirement of being light and entertaining.

Recommended in a low-key way if you can pick it up inexpensively, and like reading anecdotes about small children at Christmas.

Perhaps three and a half stars would be fairer.

[never_hate_others Freddie is cool · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was funny 😂 but was very reptative so I didn't really like it is a good book 📚 Foor little kids👶👶

[Abigail · Rating 5 out of 5]

The perfect read for a Christmas holiday, this book have me chortling and "ahhhh"ing all the way through. Anyone who had ever had contact with young children will recognise the antics and anacdotes told in these chapters. It made me want to read it outloud to all around me. In fact, I shared so much that my Auntie wanted to read it as well. Despite not usually being a book reader, she found it hard to put down and finished it within two days.

[Lid h · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very funny! I really enjoyed this book I can't get over it😂🤣

[Sephie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read his other books ages ago and loved them. As a former teacher I've heard my fair share of 'out of the mouths of babes' too. This brings back memories of the Nativity plays I was involved in staging, but he didn't report having a child accidentally set fire to his carol sheet from a candle and singe the hair of the girl standing in front of him.

[Hannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This heart-warming collection of anecdotes (which are presented to us by an ex English and Drama Inspector) is funny and well-written, which - in turn - means that it is a quick-read.

However, whilst reading A Wayne in a Manger, I sometimes found myself thinking that a few of the stories were dry, slow and uninteresting.

[Pauline · Rating 5 out of 5]

I laughed, I cried with sheer pleasure at these wonderful tales of school life. Sometimes kids get things a little mixed up, other times they get it spot on, like the little lad, in the last chapter of this book, 10 going on 40. An Excellent Read

[Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bought this on the way home from work today and read on the bus and with a cuppa coffee on getting home. Short and sweet - some really heart warming tales from school nativity plays. Loved it, but the book could have done with being much longer.

[Chris · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book in about half an hour or so. It's a short read and brilliant for this time of the year. A few anecdotes of different nativities plays and actions of children in those plays that any teacher will recognise. A fab feel good read for Christmas.

[Bernie Gale · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love his books and although this contains some of the best nativity stories it's just that a collection of stories very disjointed lacking the character building you get in the rest of his books
Like he says at the end if the book some of the stories make great short readings at Christmas

[Jireh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reminds you the purity, innocence and just joyful moment of remembering the birth of Jesus thru stories of children understanding or portraying the Nativity. Quite amusing to read.

For light reading and understanding. Parts are really inspiring, too. :)

[Poppy · Rating 5 out of 5]

What happens when Mary drops the baby or when the innkeeper invites Mary in but sends her husband packing or when the three kings refuse to hand over their gifts this book is brilliant I loved this book 📚

[Mrs Viccy Hall · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Wayne in a Manger

Gervase Phinn never disappoints. The stories just flow. He has a wonderful grasp of what children think and say. This is a very short book. but full of Christmas in every sense. Thank you sir - it made my Christmas.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

As always, a good time with Mr. Phinn. A writer I can share with nine-year-old Gabs or my 90 year old aunt.