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The Companion Chronicles #1.4
Doctor Who: The Beautiful People
Put all your worries behind you.
Situated in fifty acres of relaxing sculpted gardens, the Vita Novus Health Spa offers a sanctuary from the stresses and strains of 32nd century life. Our exclusive programme of weight loss therapy is celebrated throughout the galaxy for its ease, simplicity and one-hundred-per-cent success rate. No matter how full-figured you may be, we can make you slimmer, healthier - and happier.
In fact, you will leave Vita Novus feeling like an entirely new person. And that's guaranteed.
We cater for all endoskeletal carbon-based life-forms. All major credit cards accepted. Parties welcome.
Situated in fifty acres of relaxing sculpted gardens, the Vita Novus Health Spa offers a sanctuary from the stresses and strains of 32nd century life. Our exclusive programme of weight loss therapy is celebrated throughout the galaxy for its ease, simplicity and one-hundred-per-cent success rate. No matter how full-figured you may be, we can make you slimmer, healthier - and happier.
In fact, you will leave Vita Novus feeling like an entirely new person. And that's guaranteed.
We cater for all endoskeletal carbon-based life-forms. All major credit cards accepted. Parties welcome.
Audio CD
First published February 1, 2007
62 people want to read
About the author
Jonathan Morris
214 books70 followersJonathan Morris is one of the most prolific and popular writers of Doctor Who books, including the highly-regarded novels 'Festival of Death' and 'Touched by an Angel' and the recent guide to monsters, 'The Monster Vault'. He has also written numerous comic strips, most of which were collected in 'The Child of Time', and audios for BBC Audio and Big Finish, including the highly-regarded comedies 'Max Warp' and 'The Auntie Matter', as well as the adaptation of Russell T Davies’ 'Damaged Goods'.
Recently he has started his own audio production company, Average Romp. Releases include a full-cast adaptation of Charles Dickens' The Chimes', an original play, 'When Michael Met Benny', and three episodes of a SF sitcom, 'Dick Dixon in the 21st Century'.
For details visit www.averageromp.com
He also originated his own series, Vienna and script-edited the Nigel Planer series 'Jeremiah Bourne in Time'. He’s also written documentaries and for TV sketch shows.
Librarian note:
There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name
Recently he has started his own audio production company, Average Romp. Releases include a full-cast adaptation of Charles Dickens' The Chimes', an original play, 'When Michael Met Benny', and three episodes of a SF sitcom, 'Dick Dixon in the 21st Century'.
For details visit www.averageromp.com
He also originated his own series, Vienna and script-edited the Nigel Planer series 'Jeremiah Bourne in Time'. He’s also written documentaries and for TV sketch shows.
Librarian note:
There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
June 16, 2017
I really liked this audiobook and I think it was even better for being seen and read from the companion's view. It also doesn't hurt that Romana is my favourite Doctor Who companion. The pacing wasn't great, with uneven episode lengths and a few parts that felt like the end of an episode, but weren't, but the plot was pretty good. I mean, there has to be something wrong with a fitness spa that actually works...right? It was just a really good audiobook.
August 5, 2022
"What is the point of being beautiful if everyone is good looking"
Slow start, but ends up being really fun with a well produced final act in terms of effects and making me tense AF while I was trying to warmup for my rec basketball game.
Hesitant to go into a big finish without a full cast, but Lalla Ward was excellent. I actually felt as if she were at diner having a conversation with me and telling me this story
Episode Oprhan 55 (Which takes place in a SPA) should've honestly just copied this
Slow start, but ends up being really fun with a well produced final act in terms of effects and making me tense AF while I was trying to warmup for my rec basketball game.
Hesitant to go into a big finish without a full cast, but Lalla Ward was excellent. I actually felt as if she were at diner having a conversation with me and telling me this story
Episode Oprhan 55 (Which takes place in a SPA) should've honestly just copied this
January 14, 2022
After enjoying Frostfire immensely I decided to give The Beautiful People by Jonathan Morris a chance and I had faith he would do a brilliant job at this Tardis Team and the Season it's set in, after having experienced such brilliant stories from him such as the Festival of Death with the trio.
The Doctor in the hopes of having some Doughnuts lands The Tardis on Vita Novus. But to his disappointment, he and Romana find that the planet has been turned into a health spa where the unfit can exercise and lose all their weight with astonishing speed. But something is very wrong here and as they investigate they discover that Dame Karna has a very sinister secret to hide.
This was a really fun story that fits beautifully into the overall vibe of Season 17. Jonathan Morris has written a very good and funny story with a moral that while it works does feel like it needs a bit more clarification on what it means to gain weight and lose it. But Lalla Ward does an excellent job narrating this story and perfectly brings to life not only Romana's lines but The Doctors. Marcia Ashton also does an excellent job at portraying the villainous Karna.
Overall: This was an absolute joy to listen to and I can easily imagine this becoming a comfort audio for me when I'm feeling down. 8/10
The Doctor in the hopes of having some Doughnuts lands The Tardis on Vita Novus. But to his disappointment, he and Romana find that the planet has been turned into a health spa where the unfit can exercise and lose all their weight with astonishing speed. But something is very wrong here and as they investigate they discover that Dame Karna has a very sinister secret to hide.
This was a really fun story that fits beautifully into the overall vibe of Season 17. Jonathan Morris has written a very good and funny story with a moral that while it works does feel like it needs a bit more clarification on what it means to gain weight and lose it. But Lalla Ward does an excellent job narrating this story and perfectly brings to life not only Romana's lines but The Doctors. Marcia Ashton also does an excellent job at portraying the villainous Karna.
Overall: This was an absolute joy to listen to and I can easily imagine this becoming a comfort audio for me when I'm feeling down. 8/10
November 21, 2022
It's a real interesting story, this. The final release in the original series of four Companion Chronicles, and surprisingly not the most forgettable of the bunch, which is more an insult to Fear of the Daleks then a compliment to this. It's the first story featuring the Fourth Doctor that Big Finish ever released, and its funny seeing as he's very absent from the plot as a whole - completely missing from Parts Two and Three entirely, leaving Romana to do most of the action. If there were any companion qualified to take on the role of the Doctor for him, I can see that being Romana, so it makes a lot of sense for her to be so active an agent in the plot.
Bing is an enjoyable side character, although I would like to see a few less jokes shot directly at her from Romana and the Doctor's internal monologues. The villain, however, I couldn't take seriously at all. Exactly what you expect when I say one-time Doctor Who villain - over-the-top and not very fun to listen to. Depth is something that will not be found here.
It's short and cheap, so you may as well listen, in my opinion.
Bing is an enjoyable side character, although I would like to see a few less jokes shot directly at her from Romana and the Doctor's internal monologues. The villain, however, I couldn't take seriously at all. Exactly what you expect when I say one-time Doctor Who villain - over-the-top and not very fun to listen to. Depth is something that will not be found here.
It's short and cheap, so you may as well listen, in my opinion.
July 3, 2025
This is the definition of a frothy Doctor Who story and fits in perfectly with that Season 17 vibe that Tom and Lalla have. In a lesser writer’s hands it might easily have gone wrong, but it delivers in all the right ways - Sibella Bing comes across as Bubbles from Little Britain, Tom is off looking for doughnuts and creating a scene at the gift shop and Lalla is leading the action as if it was her show. So far, so Season 17. It’s not a very deep story and its joy is in satirising the beauty and health industry. The villain, Karna, goes the right way, slimming herself to death. Just desserts. And referring to K-9 as a cubist daschund is the perfect way to remember this silly and fun story. A nice easy listen!!!
February 8, 2018
Wasting the great Lalla Ward on a story based around fat jokes is just a crime.
Jonathan Morris also wrote the surprisingly racist "Flip-Flop" and I think I'll be steering clear of his work from here on out.
Jonathan Morris also wrote the surprisingly racist "Flip-Flop" and I think I'll be steering clear of his work from here on out.
July 22, 2024
Doctor Who stories told by campanions (audio book.) They have been OK but Doctor Who seems to mainly be best on the screen.
August 11, 2024
Lalla Ward really outdid herself on this one!
July 14, 2017
I'm really beginning to love Big Finish's The Companion Chronicles range. Even though they are not full cast audios, the stories are great and I like the emphasis on the companions and/or the companion's point of view. In this particular one, Lalla Ward does read the story (even including the chapter numbers and titles - something none of BF's productions actually do whether audio book or audio play). What I like about The Companion Chronicles range though is that because the stories are about any of the past Doctors, they are more like the BBC Books Past Doctor Adventures or the Virgin Publishing Missing Adventures line of original paperback Doctor Who novels. Those were often some of my favorite stories - and they are something I miss.
This particular story is great fun, and has a good point to it. The Doctor is barely in the story, and most of it has Romana, separated from the Doctor, having her own adventure. She and the Doctor land on a planet, hoping for some relaxation, and the Doctor is craving a good doughnut. However, they've landed on a planet-wide health spa. The diet planet, however, is hiding a dark secret - which Romana must discover and stop. The story is brilliant - fun, adventurous, but with a point to it that I appreciated and welcomed. It really felt like late 70s/early 80s Doctor Who and that was awesome too. I highly, highly recommend this story.
This particular story is great fun, and has a good point to it. The Doctor is barely in the story, and most of it has Romana, separated from the Doctor, having her own adventure. She and the Doctor land on a planet, hoping for some relaxation, and the Doctor is craving a good doughnut. However, they've landed on a planet-wide health spa. The diet planet, however, is hiding a dark secret - which Romana must discover and stop. The story is brilliant - fun, adventurous, but with a point to it that I appreciated and welcomed. It really felt like late 70s/early 80s Doctor Who and that was awesome too. I highly, highly recommend this story.
Read
April 8, 2009The Beautiful People is set mainly in a health club, which will definitely appeal to those like me who often listen to Doctor Who while on the exercise machines in the gym. It's a rather slight plot, not awfully dissimilar from The Leisure Hive (of the same era). Lalla Ward does a great job of it, though. My biggest gripe has nothing to do with either writing or acting: it is that the four episodes are very uneven in length - 25 minutes, then 18, then 12 and 12 again, with a couple more moments that sounded like they might have been potential episode endings in the middle. That's just poor pacing, and leaves the listener (or at least this listener) thrown off balance.
February 12, 2015
"Mens Sana in Thingummy Doodah"
A rather witty story based on the old chestnut of something wicked happening in a health spa.
Lalla Ward radiates an all too believable air of exasperation at the Fourth Doctor (or is it Tom himself?) that the first episode wafts onwards being catty at his expense. Peppered with in-jokes, and some very very obvious cliches being milked for humour this release concentrates less on plot (flimsy at best) and more on characterisation.
It's as serious a storyline as "City of Death" and perhaps all the better for being different from its predecessors in this series.
A rather witty story based on the old chestnut of something wicked happening in a health spa.
Lalla Ward radiates an all too believable air of exasperation at the Fourth Doctor (or is it Tom himself?) that the first episode wafts onwards being catty at his expense. Peppered with in-jokes, and some very very obvious cliches being milked for humour this release concentrates less on plot (flimsy at best) and more on characterisation.
It's as serious a storyline as "City of Death" and perhaps all the better for being different from its predecessors in this series.
June 25, 2017
A light and insubstantial tale about dark doings in a health spa. It's clearly meant to be a comedy, and is, indeed, riddled with in-jokes, but most (though not all) of them fall rather flat. The moral, while admirable, is rather over-laboured and delivered with sledgehammer finesse. The only real thing in it's favour is that it does a pretty good job of evoking the late '70s era of the show when Graham Williams was showrunner/producer. If that isn't your thing, you're missing nothing by leaving this one out.
July 20, 2014
Romana and the Doctor go to a health spa. It's a dangerous place where aliens are using it to take over the galaxy. There's some very clever set pieces, and the character of Romana is so well done. It is an entertaining listen.
April 1, 2015
The Companion Chronicles aren't full cast productions. Rather they are usually fully performed by one cast member. In this one, Lalla Ward as Romana beautifully tells the story of the Fourth Doctor and K-9 visiting a weight loss spa. You know something's not what it seems.
Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews