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Twice: How I Became A Cancer-Slaying Super Man Before I Turned 21
At 16, when most juniors are worried about getting that first car, getting a hot date, getting on the tennis team or getting into college, Benjamin Rubenstein got cancer. Too proud to accept the ministrations of his family, too angry to acknowledge the terrible odds, too young to find consolation in philosophy, Rubenstein devised his own strategy of survival: developing the delusion that he is superhuman. He would need it as he embarked on the fight of his young life.
In a battle that he chronicles here in excruciating detail, Rubenstein journeys through not one but two rounds of cancer, one at 16, one at 19. When he regained his strength at 20, Rubenstein closed his cancer chapter. His story suggests that we do not need to burden young cancer patients with the expectation that they will emerge from the disease as saints. Instead, Benjamin's clear-eyed message is that life is worth living, even if you don't expect to live to be a hundred.
In a battle that he chronicles here in excruciating detail, Rubenstein journeys through not one but two rounds of cancer, one at 16, one at 19. When he regained his strength at 20, Rubenstein closed his cancer chapter. His story suggests that we do not need to burden young cancer patients with the expectation that they will emerge from the disease as saints. Instead, Benjamin's clear-eyed message is that life is worth living, even if you don't expect to live to be a hundred.
256 pages, Hardcover
First published October 15, 2010
1 person is currently reading
12 people want to read
About the author
Benjamin Rubenstein
5 books13 followersBenjamin Rubenstein is a speaker, acclaimed storyteller, and author of two books and essays in anthologies, literary reviews, and popular websites. His talks and writing, both fiction and nonfiction, combine humor and reallness that inspire others to adapt to their challenges.
Benjamin is the author of the memoir for adults, Twice How I Became a Cancer-Slaying Super Man Before I Turned 21, and the memoir for ages 10 and up, Secrets of the Cancer-Slaying Super Man.
Benjamin graduated from the University of Virginia with a degree in economics and earned his Master of Fine Arts in creative writing degree from University of Southern Maine's Stonecoast program. He’s earned a certificate in advanced communication from Toastmasters International and an award for writing in plain English from the federal government, where he has taught others how to write clearly.
Benjamin is the author of the memoir for adults, Twice How I Became a Cancer-Slaying Super Man Before I Turned 21, and the memoir for ages 10 and up, Secrets of the Cancer-Slaying Super Man.
Benjamin graduated from the University of Virginia with a degree in economics and earned his Master of Fine Arts in creative writing degree from University of Southern Maine's Stonecoast program. He’s earned a certificate in advanced communication from Toastmasters International and an award for writing in plain English from the federal government, where he has taught others how to write clearly.
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
April 28, 2021
Very well-written. The Book demonstrates Benjamin's immense courage no matter how often doctor's talked about his odds. Fortunately, treatment for his second cancer was in the Midwest, where medical staff did not want to discuss his odds, but preferred to give him support and encouragement. Through what seemed a never-ending battle, Benjamin talked to friends, played video games and watched movies to distract himself. He also did all of his school work, graduating on-time with his class with a high grade point average. He thought of himself as a super hero convinced he would prevail. A wonderful example of the human spirit at its best.
September 14, 2015
Twice is a book that was not exactly what I had been expecting. The superhero theme made me think this was going to be an uplifting and funny account of a young man's struggle with cancer--and it was, just not in the ways I expected. I can say with utter honesty that this is the single-most harrowing book I have ever read in my life. Though I have a relative who is a breast cancer survivor, I had no real idea of what cancer treatment was like. I gained some insight by reading Siddhartha Mukherjee's "The Emperor of All Maladies: A Biography of Cancer." Before that book, I knew that cancer treatment was no joke, but hearing the historical and scientific background of the diseases (because there are many, many different types of cancer), as well as information about treatments and their related statistics, I began to realize that cancer was so much more difficult than I had imagined--and it's not as if I thought of it as a walk in the park. While that book provided me with some good, solid science, this book provided me with the human part of the equation, and it is utterly devastating. In fact, as I write this review, I am tempted to use all sorts of adjectives that sound bombastic. In this case, they aren't. There's no real way to quantify just how powerful of a memoir this is.
The thing I admired most about the book was Rubenstein's utterly unflinching honesty. This is not an easy book to read by any means. Rubenstein is very graphic in his detail, though I don't mean to suggest he does this just for the sake of being lurid. Rather, he gives a very unflinching portrayal of his experiences with cancer. This inspires a lot of mixed feelings. Though I can see where some readers might be happier not knowing this level of detail, I think I'm the better for learning it. I've had some fairly serious health issues of my own (though nothing like cancer), and I am extremely uncomfortable discussing the gory details of what I went through. Reading this book really made me question whether this idea of "polite" society is such a good one. Society seems to have something of a hero worship relationship with modern medicine and, while it's undeniable that medical technology has extended life and improved health outcomes, there is also a price to be paid. Anyone who's never been seriously ill might just think it's like having a sinus infection: you take a pill, it gets better, you put it all behind you. As Rubenstein shows in this book, becoming healthy is sometimes a tooth and nail struggle, one that has gruesome side effects and that involves unimaginable struggle. I think we might be better off knowing the unadorned details of illness because it would make people less cavalier and hopefully prevent them from feeling like they've been smacked upside the head when they do become ill. Naturally, unless you've lived through an illness you can't really know what it's like, but I think being disassociated from this knowledge leads healthy people to lack a sense of appreciation for the health and for the struggles involved in battling a serious illness.
Along with Rubenstein's honesty about his illness, he is very honest about himself. This isn't a sappy, sentimental work of fiction in which the sick person is a saint, and I think that's all to the better. Real human beings grapple with illness, and the fact that Rubenstein is so honest about how he dealt with his only makes the impact of the book greater. This aspect of the novel really speaks to the way we, as humans, all fight for survival in different ways. Rubenstein's method worked for him, and he's not shy about saying that he sometimes looked down on people who had other ways of dealing with their cancer. It seemed to me he felt he was in a survival of the fittest struggle, and he was determined to be the fittest. He doesn't make it seem easy, and I really admired the way that, every time he seemed faced with more insurmountable odds, he refused to back down and let them overcome him. Rubenstein obviously has a very strong will, and it's impressive that he maintained it even during periods that might well have broken someone who was not as strong-willed.
This work also has a profound importance in Rubenstein's insistence that he was not going to just be a "sick kid". I understand what he means by this. People who have serious diseases sometimes feel defined by their illness, and few things are more awful, really. While it's nice that people are concerned, it can also be frustrating to constantly have people asking after your health and treating you like you're an invalid. I think this also has to do with the fact that we're not always very honest about the grittiness of serious illnesses. Because people don't really understand an illness--or don't want to--they don't really know how to treat someone who has a disease. No one likes to be reduced to one aspect of their character, and the same is true of those who are ill. While "playing the cancer card" sometimes had its advantages for Rubenstein, I could see why he also rejects it. Why would anyone want to spend the rest of their life being known as the sick kid? Illness and disease are a part of a person's experience, and they don't completely define that person.
I'm very glad to have read this book. It is definitely one that will stick with me, one that made me think very deeply about things like illness, survival, and what it means to be human.
The thing I admired most about the book was Rubenstein's utterly unflinching honesty. This is not an easy book to read by any means. Rubenstein is very graphic in his detail, though I don't mean to suggest he does this just for the sake of being lurid. Rather, he gives a very unflinching portrayal of his experiences with cancer. This inspires a lot of mixed feelings. Though I can see where some readers might be happier not knowing this level of detail, I think I'm the better for learning it. I've had some fairly serious health issues of my own (though nothing like cancer), and I am extremely uncomfortable discussing the gory details of what I went through. Reading this book really made me question whether this idea of "polite" society is such a good one. Society seems to have something of a hero worship relationship with modern medicine and, while it's undeniable that medical technology has extended life and improved health outcomes, there is also a price to be paid. Anyone who's never been seriously ill might just think it's like having a sinus infection: you take a pill, it gets better, you put it all behind you. As Rubenstein shows in this book, becoming healthy is sometimes a tooth and nail struggle, one that has gruesome side effects and that involves unimaginable struggle. I think we might be better off knowing the unadorned details of illness because it would make people less cavalier and hopefully prevent them from feeling like they've been smacked upside the head when they do become ill. Naturally, unless you've lived through an illness you can't really know what it's like, but I think being disassociated from this knowledge leads healthy people to lack a sense of appreciation for the health and for the struggles involved in battling a serious illness.
Along with Rubenstein's honesty about his illness, he is very honest about himself. This isn't a sappy, sentimental work of fiction in which the sick person is a saint, and I think that's all to the better. Real human beings grapple with illness, and the fact that Rubenstein is so honest about how he dealt with his only makes the impact of the book greater. This aspect of the novel really speaks to the way we, as humans, all fight for survival in different ways. Rubenstein's method worked for him, and he's not shy about saying that he sometimes looked down on people who had other ways of dealing with their cancer. It seemed to me he felt he was in a survival of the fittest struggle, and he was determined to be the fittest. He doesn't make it seem easy, and I really admired the way that, every time he seemed faced with more insurmountable odds, he refused to back down and let them overcome him. Rubenstein obviously has a very strong will, and it's impressive that he maintained it even during periods that might well have broken someone who was not as strong-willed.
This work also has a profound importance in Rubenstein's insistence that he was not going to just be a "sick kid". I understand what he means by this. People who have serious diseases sometimes feel defined by their illness, and few things are more awful, really. While it's nice that people are concerned, it can also be frustrating to constantly have people asking after your health and treating you like you're an invalid. I think this also has to do with the fact that we're not always very honest about the grittiness of serious illnesses. Because people don't really understand an illness--or don't want to--they don't really know how to treat someone who has a disease. No one likes to be reduced to one aspect of their character, and the same is true of those who are ill. While "playing the cancer card" sometimes had its advantages for Rubenstein, I could see why he also rejects it. Why would anyone want to spend the rest of their life being known as the sick kid? Illness and disease are a part of a person's experience, and they don't completely define that person.
I'm very glad to have read this book. It is definitely one that will stick with me, one that made me think very deeply about things like illness, survival, and what it means to be human.
April 19, 2012
**This book was received as a free Advanced Reader's Copy**
When you look at the cover of Twice it's hard to be sure of what to expect. Bright yellow, with a very muscular bald Superman on the cover it certainly doesn't seem like it would be a cancer memoir. But there's a lot of things in this book that don't quite line up with your traditional cancer memoir. For one it's funny. And it certainly doesn't skimp out on naughty thoughts, gross descriptions, and general risque stuff that is more associated with other types of books. But then again Benjamin Rubenstein isn't your traditional cancer survivor.
As a teenager, Benjamin is diagnosed with Ewing's Sarcoma. Thus begins his chemotherapy treatments, hospital stays, reactions to medications, and the myriad of other things that are associated with cancer treatment. But it's no sweat, Benjamin is Superman. Or at least in his head he is. He will be the BEST cancer patient ever; quick at recovery, master of his feelings. It's lucky he has the brashness of youth to help him sustain this belief. It gets him through some difficult times. Most of all it would come in handy when after defeating the Ewing's he is diagnosed with a second cancer not too far after. This time it attacks his bone marrow and he has to be placed on a transplant list. And the recovery will be harder, more painful, and gives him a multitude of other problems he will have to face for the rest of his life. He has to face all this with his family at his side, and his friends all continuing on with their lives.
Benjamin is a pretty good narrator. He tells it like it is; and while at times I'm skeptical that he held up emotionally as well as he claims, it still reads as very inspirational. And who am I to say he didn't hold up that well? Some people just have better control of their feelings than others. I do wish I would have had a little more insight into his parents throughout the book. They're described very positively but it would have been interesting to see what their actual perspective was; not just Benjamin's interpretation of what he thought they were going through. Towards the end there's a little more light shed on the matter, but not as much as I would have hoped. We are often the stories of the people around us in addition to our own experiences, so it would have made it feel a little more complete for me. I do like how Benjamin described the other patients and the doctors. It fit in line with his trying not to be like the other "sick kids" and offered a lot of insight into his personality.
This book is pretty gritty, dirty, and is definitely chock full of hard language and themes. It's not a warm fuzzy feeling kind of book. Unless you're talking as$-kicking boots with fuzzy trim. This book doesn't leave room for pity. Benjamin tells it matter of fact and doesn't hesitate to curse, describe his bowel movements, share his upchucks with you, and basically gives you the real ride on what it's like to experience cancer. There is no calm repose at his bed thinking grand thoughts of the world. Instead there's playstation and poisonous liquids seeping into veins. And I think that's what makes this book so much more inspirational than a lot of other cancer memoirs. Everyone who goes through it is ultimately a stronger person; but with Benjamin you can really see it. And it doesn't hurt that he's a very humourous writer as well. It feels wrong to laugh at a book describing a kid going through cancer, but you just can't help it with this one. About the only thing I couldn't hack with this writing was the endless descriptions of vomit; I don't do well with bodily fluids, even if they're only in text form. But I didn't get sympathy hurls, so they weren't really too bad I suppose.
I would definitely recommend this to anyone who has had an experience with cancer. It might at the very least give them a laugh or a whole lot of inspiration and dare I say even a little hope. Because if a previously curly-headed kid can be superman, maybe others can too.
Twice
Copyright 2010
251 pages
Review by M. Reynard 2012
More of my reviews can be found at www.ifithaswords.blogspot.com
When you look at the cover of Twice it's hard to be sure of what to expect. Bright yellow, with a very muscular bald Superman on the cover it certainly doesn't seem like it would be a cancer memoir. But there's a lot of things in this book that don't quite line up with your traditional cancer memoir. For one it's funny. And it certainly doesn't skimp out on naughty thoughts, gross descriptions, and general risque stuff that is more associated with other types of books. But then again Benjamin Rubenstein isn't your traditional cancer survivor.
As a teenager, Benjamin is diagnosed with Ewing's Sarcoma. Thus begins his chemotherapy treatments, hospital stays, reactions to medications, and the myriad of other things that are associated with cancer treatment. But it's no sweat, Benjamin is Superman. Or at least in his head he is. He will be the BEST cancer patient ever; quick at recovery, master of his feelings. It's lucky he has the brashness of youth to help him sustain this belief. It gets him through some difficult times. Most of all it would come in handy when after defeating the Ewing's he is diagnosed with a second cancer not too far after. This time it attacks his bone marrow and he has to be placed on a transplant list. And the recovery will be harder, more painful, and gives him a multitude of other problems he will have to face for the rest of his life. He has to face all this with his family at his side, and his friends all continuing on with their lives.
Benjamin is a pretty good narrator. He tells it like it is; and while at times I'm skeptical that he held up emotionally as well as he claims, it still reads as very inspirational. And who am I to say he didn't hold up that well? Some people just have better control of their feelings than others. I do wish I would have had a little more insight into his parents throughout the book. They're described very positively but it would have been interesting to see what their actual perspective was; not just Benjamin's interpretation of what he thought they were going through. Towards the end there's a little more light shed on the matter, but not as much as I would have hoped. We are often the stories of the people around us in addition to our own experiences, so it would have made it feel a little more complete for me. I do like how Benjamin described the other patients and the doctors. It fit in line with his trying not to be like the other "sick kids" and offered a lot of insight into his personality.
This book is pretty gritty, dirty, and is definitely chock full of hard language and themes. It's not a warm fuzzy feeling kind of book. Unless you're talking as$-kicking boots with fuzzy trim. This book doesn't leave room for pity. Benjamin tells it matter of fact and doesn't hesitate to curse, describe his bowel movements, share his upchucks with you, and basically gives you the real ride on what it's like to experience cancer. There is no calm repose at his bed thinking grand thoughts of the world. Instead there's playstation and poisonous liquids seeping into veins. And I think that's what makes this book so much more inspirational than a lot of other cancer memoirs. Everyone who goes through it is ultimately a stronger person; but with Benjamin you can really see it. And it doesn't hurt that he's a very humourous writer as well. It feels wrong to laugh at a book describing a kid going through cancer, but you just can't help it with this one. About the only thing I couldn't hack with this writing was the endless descriptions of vomit; I don't do well with bodily fluids, even if they're only in text form. But I didn't get sympathy hurls, so they weren't really too bad I suppose.
I would definitely recommend this to anyone who has had an experience with cancer. It might at the very least give them a laugh or a whole lot of inspiration and dare I say even a little hope. Because if a previously curly-headed kid can be superman, maybe others can too.
Twice
Copyright 2010
251 pages
Review by M. Reynard 2012
More of my reviews can be found at www.ifithaswords.blogspot.com
July 22, 2011
I read this book because Ted went to school with the author's brother. He kept a positive attitude throughout and I respect him a lot for all he went through and hope that if I ever have to go through the same, I would be half as strong as he was.
July 25, 2011
An intensely personal journey of one young man who battled cancer, alive to tell the tale. This author's first book gives an insider's view of the imposition of illness on good health at a time when all experiences are life-changing. A hard subject, but told with honesty and compassion.
August 13, 2016
Intriguing, funny, sad, informational of a personal battle.
December 26, 2015
Great book. Twice and Secrets of a Cancer Slaying Superman are my favorite books of all time.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews