What do you think?
Rate this book
Jewish As a Second Language
Now bigger, better, and with more a completely revised, updated, and expanded second edition ( would it hurt to have a little more? ) of Jewish as a Second Language , the hilarious field guide to Jewish language and culture.
Written to help her Gentile husband and others like him who fall for believing a Jewish mother-in-law when she says, "Don't bother driving me, I'll take a cab," Jewish as a Second Language shows how to be one of the family—how to worry, how to interrupt, how to change your hotel room. It's not Yiddish. Though non-Jews can endear themselves by learning how to mis-use words like schmendrick and schmatta —providing both laughs and confirmation of Jewish superiority—this Jewish language is about the complex twists and somersaults of everyday speech, of unexpected nuances, hidden meanings, and swampy thickets of behavior, of wins, losses, and draws in competitions you never knew you entered. It's about the most common OAQs (obsessive anal questions): "This mole looks okay, doesn't it?" "Can Saltines go bad?" "They'll de-ice the wings before takeoff, right?" The Four Basic Shrugs. Acronyms never to use NASCAR, STD, and MRSA ( Methicillin Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus , the potentially deadly skin virus that’s spread by contact, and also by talking about it casually). The things non-Jews do for fun and what Jews Contra dance/Contradict, Read the comics/Read the obituaries, Get your boobs done/Get your taxes done. Stuff never found in a Jewish home (trout flies, a lineoleum knife, a Lay-Z-Boy, a rottweiler) or mouth (Miracle Whip, marshmallow fluff, Bud).
So you'll sit, you'll read, you'll laugh until you're nauseous. It's a nice book.
Written to help her Gentile husband and others like him who fall for believing a Jewish mother-in-law when she says, "Don't bother driving me, I'll take a cab," Jewish as a Second Language shows how to be one of the family—how to worry, how to interrupt, how to change your hotel room. It's not Yiddish. Though non-Jews can endear themselves by learning how to mis-use words like schmendrick and schmatta —providing both laughs and confirmation of Jewish superiority—this Jewish language is about the complex twists and somersaults of everyday speech, of unexpected nuances, hidden meanings, and swampy thickets of behavior, of wins, losses, and draws in competitions you never knew you entered. It's about the most common OAQs (obsessive anal questions): "This mole looks okay, doesn't it?" "Can Saltines go bad?" "They'll de-ice the wings before takeoff, right?" The Four Basic Shrugs. Acronyms never to use NASCAR, STD, and MRSA ( Methicillin Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus , the potentially deadly skin virus that’s spread by contact, and also by talking about it casually). The things non-Jews do for fun and what Jews Contra dance/Contradict, Read the comics/Read the obituaries, Get your boobs done/Get your taxes done. Stuff never found in a Jewish home (trout flies, a lineoleum knife, a Lay-Z-Boy, a rottweiler) or mouth (Miracle Whip, marshmallow fluff, Bud).
So you'll sit, you'll read, you'll laugh until you're nauseous. It's a nice book.
128 pages, Paperback
First published January 5, 1991
5 people are currently reading
127 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 28 of 28 reviews
October 11, 2023
So you’re reading this one next, no?
October 18, 2019
This is a very cute book and easily related to if you are Jewish and your spouse is not.. The insight into the Jewish vocabulary and tradition is very realistic.
February 5, 2018
This is perhaps one of the funniest books on Jewish humour that I have ever had the pleasure of reading. Not only is it funny but it is so true. I think if I had forced Frank to read this book before we were married, we would have far fewer miscommunications. If there was any doubt of my Jewishness it is erased. I'm so Jewish. No doubt about culture, there is no wonder other non-Floridian gentiles can't understand me, I'm speaking Jewish culturally. They even make a reference to that in the book in the quiz at the end. If you scored in the highest section, they say either you were paying a lot of attention to your Jewish relatives or you're from Florida. The only think wrong with the book is that Friday night was Chinese night. :)
February 5, 2019
Some parts were humorous but mostly I found this book to be an endless reinforcement of the antisemitic stereotypes of the argumentative, never-satisfied, guilt-tripping Jew.
September 18, 2022
If you're non-Jewish but have a Jewish girlfriend/boyfriend or have married into a Jewish family (almost the same thing), then this book (training manual) is for you. In fact, several Jews I know could do well to read this.
Molly Katz does a wonderful job of letting the non-Jew in on the meanings behind Jewish mannerisms, rituals, and conversations. Not that you will understand them right away. Oy vey, you're still a Goyim and these roots are hard to dye. However, with a little luck and practice, you'll be able to kvetch almost like a real Jew. Once you find yourself kvetching about someone else kvetching (most likely a Jewish relative), you stand a good chance of getting accepted into the family. Note though, that this could take decades.
Katz covers topics such as developing Jewish converstational skills, understanding the customs of your new Jewish family, and Jewish entertainment (Spoiler Alert! Entertainment does not involve camping.) I found this book to be entertaining, funny, educational, and frightening all at the same time. I think some of the topics are a stretch though because I grew up Catholic and my mother did and said some of the same things that Jewish mothers (in this book) do and say. And talk about guilt! My mother was the Yoda of guilt, wielding it like a blazing light saber.
Still, this book isn't bad. It didn't leave me nauseous. I could have done with an index. What. No index? How about an index over here? Expecting non-Jews to remember everything upon first reading is as unrealistic as a Jewish person who doesn't worry.
I recommend giving this a read if: you have Jewish family or friends, enjoy humor, want to understand Jewish culture, enjoy humor, or live in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago or that shriveled up, putz-filled state of Florida. And if you're really brave, you'll use this book as replacement text for the Haggadah at your next Seder. Mazel Tov!
Molly Katz does a wonderful job of letting the non-Jew in on the meanings behind Jewish mannerisms, rituals, and conversations. Not that you will understand them right away. Oy vey, you're still a Goyim and these roots are hard to dye. However, with a little luck and practice, you'll be able to kvetch almost like a real Jew. Once you find yourself kvetching about someone else kvetching (most likely a Jewish relative), you stand a good chance of getting accepted into the family. Note though, that this could take decades.
Katz covers topics such as developing Jewish converstational skills, understanding the customs of your new Jewish family, and Jewish entertainment (Spoiler Alert! Entertainment does not involve camping.) I found this book to be entertaining, funny, educational, and frightening all at the same time. I think some of the topics are a stretch though because I grew up Catholic and my mother did and said some of the same things that Jewish mothers (in this book) do and say. And talk about guilt! My mother was the Yoda of guilt, wielding it like a blazing light saber.
Still, this book isn't bad. It didn't leave me nauseous. I could have done with an index. What. No index? How about an index over here? Expecting non-Jews to remember everything upon first reading is as unrealistic as a Jewish person who doesn't worry.
I recommend giving this a read if: you have Jewish family or friends, enjoy humor, want to understand Jewish culture, enjoy humor, or live in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago or that shriveled up, putz-filled state of Florida. And if you're really brave, you'll use this book as replacement text for the Haggadah at your next Seder. Mazel Tov!
August 10, 2024
About 75% of this audiobook had me laughing out loud because "omg that's exactly what me/ my dad / my family " are like. Interrupting each other (i.e. cooperative overlap), loud, dramatic, joyful, kvetching, detailed discussions of health problems, cluelessly blocking the supermarket aisle to talk to friends loudly... And lots more.
And 25% I was puzzled. Maybe it's because I come from a family of Boston leftwing socialist type Jewish folks from more of a middle and working class background? Because I was puzzled by the jokes about no caffeine and eating at fancy restaurants and Jewish folks never getting on ladders or fixing their own cars or having housekeepers. Housekeepers? Who has such money? My dad used to be a professional woodworker and electrician's assistant and he fixes everything. No one ever pressured anyone to marry a doctor or a lawyer in my family that I'm aware of, though my Zayde did encourage his kids to study engineering (they did not do so). My parents encouraged me to go to art school.
And 25% I was puzzled. Maybe it's because I come from a family of Boston leftwing socialist type Jewish folks from more of a middle and working class background? Because I was puzzled by the jokes about no caffeine and eating at fancy restaurants and Jewish folks never getting on ladders or fixing their own cars or having housekeepers. Housekeepers? Who has such money? My dad used to be a professional woodworker and electrician's assistant and he fixes everything. No one ever pressured anyone to marry a doctor or a lawyer in my family that I'm aware of, though my Zayde did encourage his kids to study engineering (they did not do so). My parents encouraged me to go to art school.
November 9, 2017
This book is hysterically funny! It really doesn't matter if you are planning or not to enter a jewish family, you will enjoy the book all the same. The funniest thing is... that I discover many situtations that were very familiar, I mean, it was like reading my family usual behaviour and we are not jewish, but latin american... So funny, a great book to just spend sometime laughing out loud
December 4, 2019
Short, amusing book with a few laugh-out-loud moments.
However, for me, something was missing from the balance of satire v. approbation. The book ventured into a caricature territory in some aspects, which I found troubling.
However, for me, something was missing from the balance of satire v. approbation. The book ventured into a caricature territory in some aspects, which I found troubling.
October 24, 2020
Very funny
March 15, 2022
I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard reading a book!
September 14, 2022
Damn funny
January 1, 2023
Some laugh out loud pages
January 27, 2023
Completely hysterical!! And quick.
January 16, 2024
Listened to this in audiobook form on Spotify and was gifted a physical copy. Once I got to the end of listening to this brief book my honest first reaction was: Okay, now what do you LIKE about being Jewish? I hope this felt cathartic to write because under every sardonic joke seemed to be a small cry for help. That said, three stars because while I was mildly bewildered, the reviews show this is indeed something a specific type of person from a specific generation can relate well to. I echo the sentiments of the low star reviews, but I have a hard time hating a book I think was simply not meant for me. Gonna rehome to the first elderly Jewish person of the Borscht Belt I come across and hope they love it because that seems the target audience.
February 11, 2009
Mildly amusing.
You’ll probably recognise yourself, your relatives or some of your social circle (or your parents’ circles) in many of the situations covered.
I can’t help thinking, though, that much of this belongs to an era of “ethnic Judaism” that has almost come to an end. Jewish society has become much more diverse, to the point where many of the anecdotes start to look like stereotypes that no longer have a basis in the Jewish world today.
Still, I enjoyed it, and sometimes it really was like looking over my shoulder in a mirror.
You’ll probably recognise yourself, your relatives or some of your social circle (or your parents’ circles) in many of the situations covered.
I can’t help thinking, though, that much of this belongs to an era of “ethnic Judaism” that has almost come to an end. Jewish society has become much more diverse, to the point where many of the anecdotes start to look like stereotypes that no longer have a basis in the Jewish world today.
Still, I enjoyed it, and sometimes it really was like looking over my shoulder in a mirror.
March 15, 2015
This is a very quick read and it is pretty inconsistent in quality. Some parts I laughed out loud and others were just stupid. But for the time it takes, it is worth it for the few gems. Being in an interfaith marriage, it is always affirming to read something like this that reminds me of the commonality of the American Jewish experience. The book is a little old but much of it rings true from things I remember from my childhood.
June 7, 2010
Great book! Was just back home in NY and my friend and I came across this book. We each bought a copy and were hysterical laughing the whole time. This book is so true and we could relate with each topic discussed. A book that is not only recommended to people who are recent MOTT's but for those of us who have always been a Jew.
August 7, 2008
Ever-so-slightly moderately amusing at times. Although fairly accurate most of the time. I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel with what the Nursing Home library has to offer in terms of English-language selections.
September 21, 2020
Some parts of this book are laugh-out-loud funny, other parts are pretty meh. It’s a quick read though, and it did give me some insight into some of my own behaviours — be they nurture or nature —, and I can now allocate at least part of my family’s insanities.
Want to read
January 28, 2008I saw this book in the gift shop in the Tenement Museum in NYC. I've been meaning to get a copy and read it- it looked so clever when I flipped through it.
October 21, 2010
Absolutely hysterical! Tears of laughter ran down my face!
Boy, is it fun to laugh!
Boy, is it fun to laugh!
July 13, 2011
Wouldn't necessarily have to be Jewish to fit the bill for this book. I see a lot of the behaviors here in myself......wait.....maybe I AM Jewish. Hmmmmmm.
March 1, 2014
Hilarious. All rather tongue-in-cheek, this little book paints a picture of what it's like to be Jewish. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?
December 18, 2014
From a poll in it:
"Are you planning to marry/work with a Jewish person... If yes, do you feel comfortable with his/her family?
Yes 0%
No 77%
Just Stab Me Now 23%"
"Are you planning to marry/work with a Jewish person... If yes, do you feel comfortable with his/her family?
Yes 0%
No 77%
Just Stab Me Now 23%"
March 13, 2015
interesting book.
March 14, 2015
Fun read, particularly for a goy who grew up in a predominantly Jewish community.
March 16, 2013
So funny it hurts to laugh
September 26, 2012
Hilarious!
Displaying 1 - 28 of 28 reviews