A Real Life: Restoring What Matters: Family, Good Friends, and a True Community

by Ferenc Máté

We seem to have forgotten what life is all about. So begins this heartfelt, laugh-out-loud follow-up to Máté's cult classic, A Reasonable Life. He warns us that lulled by electronic pacifiers and hypnotized by sublimed greed, we are becoming physically inert, intellectually blinkered, and devoid of deep emotion. Our unquestioned obsession with goods and gadgets has displaced true and lasting joys like our health, creativity, fulfillment, and, most importantly, our time spent with one another. How has our pursuit of the American dream left us? Financially insecure, estranged from our family, helpless without our wireless toys, increasingly isolated, overweight and, pervasively depressed. But don t despair, a renaissance is underway. M t 's call for genuine, physical, passionate living challenges you to re-evaluate the meanings of success, security, technological progress, and how you work, eat, play, and love.

Simple steps can turn your life around, let you take control, and find satisfaction in a better and much fuller existence. Surprising statistics and engaging anecdotes will rekindle your forgotten pride and joy in independence, neighborliness, working with your hands, and the irreplaceable rewards of time spent in nature and in face to face relationships. e the mall and gadgets a rest and get a real life.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir

256 pages, Hardcover

First published June 13, 2011

About the author

Ferenc Máté has made a career of out documenting his own quests—whether it’s restoring a Tuscan ruin, building a vineyard from scratch, or sailing the seven seas.

Born in Transylvania, he escaped at age eleven when the Hungarian revolution was crushed by Soviet tanks. He grew up in Vancouver and has lived in California, Paris, Rome, the Bahamas and New York. He has worked on a railroad extra-gang and as a boat-builder, photographer, deckhand and book editor. He is the author of 16 books translated into 12 languages. His international best seller A Vineyard in Tuscany, was a New York Times Notable Book and short listed for Spain’s Camino del Cid literary award. His Dugger/Nello historical novel series have made him “the leading nautical writer of our time.” With his wife and son, he works the Máté vineyards surrounding the 13th century friary they restored in Montalcino, Italy. They have won global recognition for making one of the world’s best Brunellos.

Please visit:
http://www.ferencmate.com/
http://www.facebook.com/ferencmate
https://twitter.com/FerencMate
http://www.matewine.com/

Reviews

[Donna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I just don't know. It's an easy read and the author makes some excellent points about the need for solitude, community, self - sufficiency and pride in personal achievements..... But something doesn't quite ring true. Any "work" that is not manual labor is dismissed, and although the call to simplicity is valid - I don't WANT to spend all my days cooking and canning and gardening and building my own house that certainly would never meet local codes.... His points about superficial interaction (Internet, Facebook or texting) or over-indulging in TV are indeed cautionary- but is it ALL bad, all the time? I did appreciate the pages devoted to "reading"- real paper books- settling into ourselves for some long, deep thinking time. All in all, I think I must judge for myself. And I do wonder what the Kindle sales are on this particular book?

[Ellen · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this book, the author wrote about his observations on everything that is wrong about the mad modern life, that is above all driven by greed, lack of sense of self (and therefore empathy and sympathy), the inhumane technology, and the the disappearing communities. The solutions given are from cited researches and his own rich life experiences, from his childhood in Hungary and Canada; ever lived in Vancouver, New York, Paris and then Tuscany; bringing up his son together with his wife; his encounters with warm and not so warm friends and strangers; growing up his own food in vegetable garden and having his own vineyard.

All in all, an enjoyable read, although the idea in the book is nothing new. However, it succeeded in emphasizing the point to make us remember that we own our life, and teaches us to be mindful about how we live our life.

[Kevin C. · Rating 3 out of 5]

lots of straw-man arguments, overstating the case, etc

There is some common sense in this book, but for me it was devalued by the form of argument. There were lots of examples of straw-man arguments, overstating the case, etc.

[Kasia · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book for people, who like manual work (not me), but I liked the part about being offline ans in nature.

[Richard B · Rating 2 out of 5]

Whilst the author of this book had some interesting things to say, although nothing amazingly revolutionary - watch less/no TV, social media sucks your soul, grow your own vegetables etc. etc - he did it such a way that was so smug and self aggrandizing that if he had been telling you all this at a party you would have just wanted to walk away, or punch him. In fact the most interesting parts of the book were a couple of appendices that had some good gardening tips that weren't written by him.

So if you want to feel bad for not having built your own yacht from scratch, or restored your own Tuscan monastery and turned it into an award winning vineyard all whilst home schooling your children then this is the book for you.

I only gave it two stars for the appendices and the handful of good practical suggestions he has which he could have put down in a chapter.

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

There aren't many non-fiction books I can claim have truly changed my way of thinking about life and the world, but this book did. Each chapter made me want to laugh, cry, and scream at the same time. There were so many great points, it's hard to sum up - but this is a book I will lend to anyone and everyone and hope that it makes their mind and hearts turn like mine did. Highly recommended read.

[Ken · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book pissed me off...continually...every time I picked it up. It was not so much that I disagreed with the general direction or points that the author starts, but that every single argument took the lazy path of ranting like a jaded old man screaming at kids to get off his lawn. I know he is more thoughtful than this, but this work did not exemplify it.

[Judy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is interesting to say the least. It does make one ponder about what really matters in life. It will inspire you to make changes in what your priorities are in hopes of a more fulfilling life. It will cause you to stop and think!

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another good read that makes you think about the changes you should be making in your daily life. Having only just read his first book on the topic 'A Reasonable Life' which was written 20 years ago there were a few passages that were repetative but this is forgiveable.

[Adam Ross · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fascinating book of meditations on the good life. Like with some other writers on genuine community, Mate can verge into anti-technology curmugeon on occasion, but these are rare and there is a lot of good stuff inside as well.

[Mr.soule · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent book! I'd like to read this again next year

[Barb Kelownagurl · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book because it not only made me think, it validated what I already believe. Good stuff but not for everyone.

[bookinglibrarian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mate is always right on, and this timely book is a good 21st century follow-up to his earlier work, A Reasonable Life, which discusses similar issues.