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Waiting For Spring
The pain in Tess Dyer’s heart stems from a lifetime of rejection: by her distant mother, by a string of one-night stands, and by her husband, Jason. He promised to love her forever, yet here she is, divorced and shunned in her own town. She tries everything to dull the pain: sex, work, and endlessly cleaning the house. Finally, in a fit of despair, she abandons the small town of Brookfield, Maine, for an even smaller town, determined to start over with a clean slate. But she can’t run from the demons in her head, and she soon falls back on her old habits, this time with the help of her sexy new neighbor Brian. Though she tells herself he is just a warm body to dull the pain, his kindness has a soothing effect on her bruised heart. But the fear of losing his love is always there, and before long, Tess’s past threatens to destroy her fragile new happiness. Ultimately, she must make a choice: continue drifting through life, or confront the cruel realities of her past and start living. A dramatic departure from contemporary chick-lit, Waiting for Spring is a moving novel about a real woman struggling to find her place in the world.
608 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2007
41 people are currently reading
333 people want to read
About the author
R.J. Keller
2 books67 followersR.J. Keller is the author of WAITING FOR SPRING. She is the co-host of Between Two Couch Cushions with author Danielle Bannister and the co-host of Stacey Cochran Live, an internet talk show featuring interviews with authors and publishing professionals. An avid independent movie enthusiast, she was Managing Editor of The Movie Fanatic website. She wrote, filmed, and edited episodes of the writer-centric YouTube show, Inside The Writers’ Studio, with author Kristen Tsetsi. She lives in Midcoast Maine with her husband and their extraordinarily adventurous cat. She is the mother of three grown children, for whom she now acts as tech support.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 80 reviews
November 26, 2010
While this book doesn't fall into my normal reading genres, I'm very happy I went outside my comfort zone and read this book. I found the characters well developed, even the ones I didn't like. The story kept me engaged and I even engaged the text to speech feature (which I don't really like) so that I could "read" in the car. I was very moved by this book, both positively and negatively. I found myself saddened by some of the trials of the characters and filled with hope by others. Thank you RJ for your story. It was very enjoyable.
December 7, 2009
Actually, I guess this book could be a 2 1/2 star book, because there were many places where the writing very good.
My disklikes: Too much adult language (very distracting), and too much sex, that didn't add to the story. The book was too long, if 100 pages had been edited out, it would have been better. The ending was very good. I think my biggest problem was that I couln't sympathize with the main character, I didn't like her. I almost liked the other characters better.
My likes: Some of the prose was wonderful. The setting was a good one as well.
My disklikes: Too much adult language (very distracting), and too much sex, that didn't add to the story. The book was too long, if 100 pages had been edited out, it would have been better. The ending was very good. I think my biggest problem was that I couln't sympathize with the main character, I didn't like her. I almost liked the other characters better.
My likes: Some of the prose was wonderful. The setting was a good one as well.
October 31, 2009
This book could benefit from serious editing, 30 percent of it could and should be deleted. Length does not always equal quality. Excess can (and did) result in a very annoyed reader.
June 21, 2014
Another Kindle Daily Deal - okay, so they suck you in on a $2 price for the first book of a 20 book series - each of which is at least $10.99 - but they also offer some new authors, and occasionally an established author - which gives you a chance to try something new/different.
And, although I live in Dallas, TX, my heart belongs in Maine, so 'anything' Maine draws my attention.
You can go read the story line somewhere else, this is a book about people with problems/challenges and just trying to make it through another day.
This is a book about strong emotions, what they feel like and the impact they have.
This is a book about hope and understanding sometimes we have to change something, or deal with something we'd rather avoid, to take the next step forward.
This is a book about real people struggling to help others, help themselves, and the impacts they might, or did, or could have made.
This is a book about human failures and successes.
Yeah, it's chick lit, but not off the deep end, but a story about what become very real people.
I did read that some reviews didn't like it because there was too much sex - although part of the problem of the main character is how she uses sex - so not sure you could just leave it out - and it's not too graphic, and usually makes sense.
And some reviewers didn't like the 'language' as in 'cuss words' Should we elect to only read books which do or don't contain certain words - although I'm not sure how one would know- but there must be an app for that.
The author of a story, or a song writer, must choose the words they think the characters would use, or choose the words which best fit a description/circumstances, or choose the words they believe will have the most impact on the reader/listener.
A young singer friend of mine once asked the audience if it was okay to sing a song containing a 'bad' word, because if not she could use a different word.
I talked to her later and suggested they are her words, carefully chosen to 'present' to an audience her thoughts/feelings and it was up to her to choose which words she put into the lyrics - not the audience. And if she felt it was inappropriate to sing that song because of children in the audience, for example, to just sing a different song, but don't change what she initially wrote.
Words are powerful things and we should care about what they are saying, not which ones are used, but that's just my two cents worth.
And, although I live in Dallas, TX, my heart belongs in Maine, so 'anything' Maine draws my attention.
You can go read the story line somewhere else, this is a book about people with problems/challenges and just trying to make it through another day.
This is a book about strong emotions, what they feel like and the impact they have.
This is a book about hope and understanding sometimes we have to change something, or deal with something we'd rather avoid, to take the next step forward.
This is a book about real people struggling to help others, help themselves, and the impacts they might, or did, or could have made.
This is a book about human failures and successes.
Yeah, it's chick lit, but not off the deep end, but a story about what become very real people.
I did read that some reviews didn't like it because there was too much sex - although part of the problem of the main character is how she uses sex - so not sure you could just leave it out - and it's not too graphic, and usually makes sense.
And some reviewers didn't like the 'language' as in 'cuss words' Should we elect to only read books which do or don't contain certain words - although I'm not sure how one would know- but there must be an app for that.
The author of a story, or a song writer, must choose the words they think the characters would use, or choose the words which best fit a description/circumstances, or choose the words they believe will have the most impact on the reader/listener.
A young singer friend of mine once asked the audience if it was okay to sing a song containing a 'bad' word, because if not she could use a different word.
I talked to her later and suggested they are her words, carefully chosen to 'present' to an audience her thoughts/feelings and it was up to her to choose which words she put into the lyrics - not the audience. And if she felt it was inappropriate to sing that song because of children in the audience, for example, to just sing a different song, but don't change what she initially wrote.
Words are powerful things and we should care about what they are saying, not which ones are used, but that's just my two cents worth.
September 29, 2019
A funny and relatable novel about self navigation and starting over. In my second read now and it never fails to make me smile.
July 3, 2021
Encontré este libro vagando de lista en lista por internet. En alguna lista tipo "Libros ubicados en zonas rurales de Estados Unidos" encontré este título y el review de un desconocido me convenció. Decía que gustaba de este libro porque estaba en contra de censurar los garabtos o las cosas tristes en pos de "gustar".,
Este libro no censura los garabatos ni las cosas tristes, eso está claro. Los dice, las muestra y aún así no es un libro deprimente.
La historia es sobre una mujer que deja su ciudad para iniciar una nueva vida alejada de sus "nubes oscuras" en una nueva ubicación. Me gustó mucho el inicio del libro, en que decide a qué pueblo ir tras leer en el diario que en un pueblito cercano asesinaron a mujer dedicada a hacer el aseo de prácticamente todos los residentes.
Con ese primer acercamiento -primera o segunda página máximo- me esperaba algo ligado a ese crimen. No, la verdad es que a la protagonista sólo le convence la noticia porque le asegura que podrá tomar el trabajo de hacer aseo en todos los lugares en que además de llorar la partida de la fallecida... necesitarán alguien para su reemplazo.
A ratos novela romántica y a ratos "28 días" (la película con Sandra Bullock), me gustó. Me gustó.
Este libro no censura los garabatos ni las cosas tristes, eso está claro. Los dice, las muestra y aún así no es un libro deprimente.
La historia es sobre una mujer que deja su ciudad para iniciar una nueva vida alejada de sus "nubes oscuras" en una nueva ubicación. Me gustó mucho el inicio del libro, en que decide a qué pueblo ir tras leer en el diario que en un pueblito cercano asesinaron a mujer dedicada a hacer el aseo de prácticamente todos los residentes.
Con ese primer acercamiento -primera o segunda página máximo- me esperaba algo ligado a ese crimen. No, la verdad es que a la protagonista sólo le convence la noticia porque le asegura que podrá tomar el trabajo de hacer aseo en todos los lugares en que además de llorar la partida de la fallecida... necesitarán alguien para su reemplazo.
A ratos novela romántica y a ratos "28 días" (la película con Sandra Bullock), me gustó. Me gustó.
January 6, 2012
When I read a book I become emotionally engrossed in it, sometimes this habit is good, because the book will brighten my mood or make me a stronger person, while other times the words that flow from the pages (to create the movie in my head) leave little burn marks, like a projector that was wound to tightly. “Waiting for Spring” was the later.
I have read so many books lately that focus on peoples inability to control, rely, or believe in themselves that it’s starting to make me wonder if this is how the majority of humanity actually feels on a daily basis. So my new motto is this: We are human, we make mistakes, we are damaged but we are beautiful.
“Waiting for Spring” was a difficult book to read, not structurally, because in actuality the writing was undeniably masterful, but the plot was so emotionally torturous (on so many levels) that it actually made me want to kidnap the characters and take care of them myself.
Tess is a whore, or so she has been told since she was sixteen. Emotionally damaged by her mother, and the scrutinizing eyes of a small town, she has forgotten how to love…even herself. With one life ending and another life beginning, (in a town miles away,) Tess thinks the slate is clean. Start over, eventually forget the past, and start a future…even if that future only consist of cleaning other people’s toilets and having enough cash for beer. But what happens when being invisible is impossible? What happens when you fall in love with other damaged people…people with drug problems, daddy issues, and years of missed opportunities? What happens when the worst case scenario happens, and the second life you’ve worked so hard to build turns to rubble in less than 2 hours? What happens when the glue that keeps you together melts?
“RJ Keller” penned a story about denial, rage, hatred, addiction, abandonment, loneliness, love and acceptance. “RJ Keller” wrote a piece of literature that defines the phrases “Giving Up” and “Learning to Live” and she did it with some of the most beautifully descriptive paragraphs I have ever read. She had an understanding that “love” and “sorry” are simple words for strong emotions, and that people hold on to guilt as easily as they do money, but most importantly she let the reader experience what happens when there is an overwhelming loss of control.
The first couple of chapters seemed a little apprehensive…like “Keller” was searching desperately for a way to express her feelings, and I thought that the preface was completely unnecessary, but regardless of the initial missing depth, the rest of the novel was so deep that at times I felt like I had to take a break just to learn how to breathe again.
This book was NOT in any way shape or form a quick read, it is roughly 480 pages and believe me when I say you feel each and every one of them. There was also a rampant use of the “F” word, but once it was said more than 200 or so times, it pretty much seemed like second nature, and to be perfectly honest… I don’t really think there could have been a better word to use.
This book is definatly not a light hearted read and therefore I do not recommend it for everyone (especially younger audiences) but I do whole heartedly recommend it for those of you who like a serious, well crafted story.
Happy reading my fellow Kindle-ites and remember: Yankees rule…Boston sucks… so just deal with it! (*wink*)
I have read so many books lately that focus on peoples inability to control, rely, or believe in themselves that it’s starting to make me wonder if this is how the majority of humanity actually feels on a daily basis. So my new motto is this: We are human, we make mistakes, we are damaged but we are beautiful.
“Waiting for Spring” was a difficult book to read, not structurally, because in actuality the writing was undeniably masterful, but the plot was so emotionally torturous (on so many levels) that it actually made me want to kidnap the characters and take care of them myself.
Tess is a whore, or so she has been told since she was sixteen. Emotionally damaged by her mother, and the scrutinizing eyes of a small town, she has forgotten how to love…even herself. With one life ending and another life beginning, (in a town miles away,) Tess thinks the slate is clean. Start over, eventually forget the past, and start a future…even if that future only consist of cleaning other people’s toilets and having enough cash for beer. But what happens when being invisible is impossible? What happens when you fall in love with other damaged people…people with drug problems, daddy issues, and years of missed opportunities? What happens when the worst case scenario happens, and the second life you’ve worked so hard to build turns to rubble in less than 2 hours? What happens when the glue that keeps you together melts?
“RJ Keller” penned a story about denial, rage, hatred, addiction, abandonment, loneliness, love and acceptance. “RJ Keller” wrote a piece of literature that defines the phrases “Giving Up” and “Learning to Live” and she did it with some of the most beautifully descriptive paragraphs I have ever read. She had an understanding that “love” and “sorry” are simple words for strong emotions, and that people hold on to guilt as easily as they do money, but most importantly she let the reader experience what happens when there is an overwhelming loss of control.
The first couple of chapters seemed a little apprehensive…like “Keller” was searching desperately for a way to express her feelings, and I thought that the preface was completely unnecessary, but regardless of the initial missing depth, the rest of the novel was so deep that at times I felt like I had to take a break just to learn how to breathe again.
This book was NOT in any way shape or form a quick read, it is roughly 480 pages and believe me when I say you feel each and every one of them. There was also a rampant use of the “F” word, but once it was said more than 200 or so times, it pretty much seemed like second nature, and to be perfectly honest… I don’t really think there could have been a better word to use.
This book is definatly not a light hearted read and therefore I do not recommend it for everyone (especially younger audiences) but I do whole heartedly recommend it for those of you who like a serious, well crafted story.
Happy reading my fellow Kindle-ites and remember: Yankees rule…Boston sucks… so just deal with it! (*wink*)
May 28, 2009
To begin with my expectations were low of this book but I am glad I persisted as the author surprised me by producing a work that, although quite unlike anything I've read in the past, produced deep characters and a plot that kept me read till the end. I enjoyed the style of writing; the way Tess experienced and viewed the world and people around her. Another aspect which I favoured was how each item mentioned turned out later to have a significance and meaning beyond it's initial appearance.
The minor qualms I had on my journey through this book were: at times it felt like life centred far too much on sex!, and I also had a nagging feeling that Tess never really fitted into her 'new world' at New Mills...she was too middle class, whereas the place she moved was more working, however, the conclusion resolved my unease about her character and I ended up feeling she was living in just the right place.
There was one serve in this plot which I never expected or saw coming and I felt it was very much out of Tess's charcter, but it added a bit of spice to the story and the author had clearly researched the topic well as her knowledge came through in her writing - essential for it to have been believable.
All in all, a good book. I usually avoid romances as I find them dull, but although this book centred around love it was anything but dull...there was enough going on throughout the story emotionally to touch the reader and get you thinking, plus there was a certain one-liner contained within which I found particulary moving. It hadn't been something I had been expecting but at times I felt the pain and almost laughed aloud at the humour which peppered the plot despite the hard times experienced by the characters...for a book to do that is a sign of a good writer as I am certainly not the sentimental type to cry at movies!
The minor qualms I had on my journey through this book were: at times it felt like life centred far too much on sex!, and I also had a nagging feeling that Tess never really fitted into her 'new world' at New Mills...she was too middle class, whereas the place she moved was more working, however, the conclusion resolved my unease about her character and I ended up feeling she was living in just the right place.
There was one serve in this plot which I never expected or saw coming and I felt it was very much out of Tess's charcter, but it added a bit of spice to the story and the author had clearly researched the topic well as her knowledge came through in her writing - essential for it to have been believable.
All in all, a good book. I usually avoid romances as I find them dull, but although this book centred around love it was anything but dull...there was enough going on throughout the story emotionally to touch the reader and get you thinking, plus there was a certain one-liner contained within which I found particulary moving. It hadn't been something I had been expecting but at times I felt the pain and almost laughed aloud at the humour which peppered the plot despite the hard times experienced by the characters...for a book to do that is a sign of a good writer as I am certainly not the sentimental type to cry at movies!
June 26, 2011
I thought the beginning really captured the sadness and pain of the main character Tess. But it never ended and just seemed to get worse and worse. I hated the constant "counting" the main character did--from the steps to her apartment to how many days since something bad happened. Maybe I missed something there. I obviously got that Tess used sex for validation, etc...but the sex in this book (usually called f--ing) got old really fast. For someone who supposedly thought in terms of color, and creative colors at that, there was nothing bright and colorful about Tess or this story. I thought the drug dealer and Rachel story was bizarre and anyone could see how that was going to end. I hated the stupid story about the broken pin...I feel terrible for being so mean, but the ending was so neat and tidy and unbelievable I just had to cringe--I think it might have been better to end like "Looking For Mr. Goodbar." I think this was a first novel, so I have to say, I couldn't have done it, but maybe streamline the story next time. I'm still "Waiting for Spring" No pun intended--well actually yes it was!
March 18, 2014
Generally I like a little chick lit now and then. And to be fair, the pace and flow of the book was great and, whether you liked them or not, the characters were full blown and alive so kudos to the author for that. It's very possible the timing of my reading of this wasn't great but I honestly really didn't like it. I think I am just personally getting tired of stories about women that are almost 40 acting like they're in their late teens. Maybe today's society is just way more juvenile than what I grew up with. I don't know - I get that most of us don't have perfect lives and that we all grow up at different rates but honestly by Tess's age she should have way outgrown the "I hate my mother, my life sucks, I'm divorced with no prospects so I think I'll run away" syndrome. And I also think I started to count how many times the word "f*&&" was on each page....which is another bad sign.
I'm just so done with these types of stories.
If she'd been in her late 20s I might have liked it better and bought off on the whole premise more.
For me -- this was bleh.
I'm just so done with these types of stories.
If she'd been in her late 20s I might have liked it better and bought off on the whole premise more.
For me -- this was bleh.
December 31, 2011
This is a tough one to review because I was sucked into the story and wanted to know what happened, but I felt like the book was way too long and just wanted it to end. I got annoyed at the mopey main character--think Bella Swan times a hundred. She hates herself because her mother hated her and because she had sex with tons of guys to try to make herself feel better. There were also see things I found unrealistic. On the plus side, I felt like I was rooting for the main characters, and I could empathize with them. So I guess the author was good at creating characters I cared about, she just needed to cut about 100-200 pages of nonsense. Also, this book contained lots of graphic sex and language (not that there's anything wrong with that.)
June 19, 2010
I liked the warm, flawed, funny heroine in Waiting for Spring. Tess and the situations she found herself in felt authentic, as if the writer was writing from the heart if not actually drawing on episodes from her own life. Tess deals with tragedy, love, sex, work , heartache and loss during the course of the book - and all of it feels credible.
On a separate note, the author has made a series of funny short films with her fellow author Kristen Tsetsi about 'the writer's life' which I enjoyed very much - it's what persuaded me to read Waiting for Spring in the first place. You can find them under 'PaperRats' on YouTube.
On a separate note, the author has made a series of funny short films with her fellow author Kristen Tsetsi about 'the writer's life' which I enjoyed very much - it's what persuaded me to read Waiting for Spring in the first place. You can find them under 'PaperRats' on YouTube.
April 9, 2012
I really enjoyed this book. The story felt so real I couldn't put it down even when I was too tired and sleepy to hold my phone in front of my face. It was an emotional roller coaster, I could feel not only Tess' pain, but the whole range of emotions every character went through. Thank you so much for it, Kel!
March 9, 2012
I loved this book. From the very first page, I was hooked by the writing style and couldn't put it down. I started it thinking that I knew how it would play out. I was wrong. The author surprised me countless times.
I laughed, and I cried. A book that can do both has my vote!
I've recommended this one to all my friends.
Good stuff.
I laughed, and I cried. A book that can do both has my vote!
I've recommended this one to all my friends.
Good stuff.
June 15, 2015
Should have listened to the other reviewers. It is much more violent that it appears in the summary etc. And this author uses waaaay too many words. In one paragraph says the same thing 5 different ways, over and over.
March 7, 2009
This book has captured raw emotion like no other I have ever read. I wept many times while reading this. I ached for the leading character. It was a good book I liked it
April 21, 2011
It was a beautiful story of family, pain, forgiveness, love and moving on. But it feels a little too wordy.
July 23, 2014
Couldn't put it down - first time I've finished a book in 2 days in about 5 years
August 21, 2021
Great read
I had a hard time putting it down. Great story love the characters. I laughed and I cried along with them.
I had a hard time putting it down. Great story love the characters. I laughed and I cried along with them.
October 5, 2009
For a standard “woman starting over after a failed relationship” type of story, this one had a rough edge to it that I liked -- liked a lot. If more contemporary women's fiction was written like this, I would read more of it. Tess, our narrator and main character, is a little off. She is Neurotic. Very. Very. Neurotic. Not to mention: cynical, sarcastic, and self-absorbed. Not much to like really, but considering her dysfunctional childhood, her bleak outlook on life seems somewhat justified. She sort of reminded me of a cross between Bukowski’s crass malcontented characters and Jennifer Aniston’s character in the movie Friends with Money: the sarcastic cleaning woman who isn’t living up to her potential, who gets stoned and obsesses over the man she lost. But this story has so much more to it than that.
To match the personality of the narrator, the narrative itself is very coarse. Tess just says what’s on her mind, and at times, it can be quite melodramatic. There is a fondness for choppy little fragmented thoughts and sentences that becomes noticeable right away. I felt it alluded to the character’s choppy, abrupt, and rather disjointed attitude about her own life and her own identity, but the chop might wear on some readers after a while because everything is so disconnected and at the same time completely exposed. Some might even say that Tess is a bit over exposed, and I would agree with that, but first person narratives with this type of story arc tend to feel self-indulgent, and so I felt the tell it all, here I am, and if you don’t like it go fuck yourself self-exploratory narrative was important to the characterization. Tess is raw, in more ways than one, and we feel it in the narrative. She is bitchy and vulgar on the surface in order to cover up deep-seated feelings of inadequacy, which she obsesses over endlessly to the point of sabotaging anything good that comes into her life. She has a toxic personality disorder, and some readers might find themselves disenchanted with her about half way through the book. I had a similar issue with Love and Other Natural Disasters by Holly Shumas, as the narrator’s neurosis was similar to Tess’. Some readers might find this a bit much to warrant the exasperating number of pages devoted to Tess’ self-destructive foibles and obsessive reminiscing. A prudent cut here and there would have taken care of this issue, but I liked Tess’ honesty, so even though the narrative seemed to drag a bit here and there and her obsessing did start to wear on my nerves after a while, I still didn’t mind spending so much time with her. Even in today’s liberated society, I still see women stifling themselves on a regular basis. Tess’ neurosis was all too familiar, and so the exposition was rather refreshing.
Structurally, the story begins with a prologue and establishes the narrator’s view on God, authority, and justice in the world. I liked the crayon metaphor, and considering it was introduced so early in the piece as if it were going to be a grounding element, I was disappointed that, thematically, it wasn’t carried through the text as deliberately as I had hoped it would be for such a powerful personality statement. We get dribs and drabs but not enough to fully flesh out that side of Tess’ personality, the true artistic and visionary side, which might have been the juxtaposition the story needed to offset her persecution complex.
For the story arc, we have Tess, our narrator and recently divorced thirty-something who is struggling with the demise of her marriage -- among other issues. She decides at the start of the story to try to escape herself by making a new start in a new town -- a new town where nobody knows her or knows about her past indiscretions. Then there is Jason, her ex, who left her because she had adamantly made it known throughout their marriage that she didn’t want to have children. Of course, we find out later that that wasn’t really the reason for his divorcing her. The real reason becomes obvious the more time you spend with Tess. Then we have Tess’ Brother David and her sister-in-law Kim. They are expecting their first child, which will predictably force Tess to reassess her position on the matter. Tess’ parents are typical archetypes: the mother is a cruel cold-hearted fault-finding selfish vindictive shrew, and since I have some extensive experience with that sort of nurturing, I could relate, and the father is basically the all around nice guy doormat who is too tired to fight anymore. There is a litany of other minor characters and sub-plots all of which refract the underlying themes of the story very well.
In the first third of the narrative, Tess moves to a new town and almost immediately takes up with Brian -- the younger man who lives downstairs from her -- in an effort to use sex to drown out the pain she feels over her failed marriage and her perceived failed life, even if she can't admit that that is what she is doing. The remainder of the book deals with Tess and Brian’s relationship, his failed relationship with his alcoholic father, and his relationship with his drug-addicted troubled younger sister. Tess’ inner conflict is reflected back into the narrative as she explores her own inter-personal relationships with the people who surround her in the story. As we all do in life, when we cannot confront our own shadow, we use the lives of others to sort out our own existential dilemmas and our own personal philosophies. It’s Tess’ idiosyncratic perception of the world around her that deepens her feelings of persecution and thus drives the story. Had the narrative been written any other way other than from her point of view, I think the intensity would have been lost, as the immediate storyline is offset with random flashbacks, and the intervals are pretty frequent. This is how the backstory of Tess’ entire life is revealed for the most part -- indulgent yes, but for Tess, it works.
As far as the technical stuff goes: I noticed a few fiddly punctuation issues: In this font the em-dashes seemed the same size as hyphens and not proper em-dashes, so reading those sentences made the eyes go a mite bit buggy because the sentences seemed confusing at first glance. There were some minor interior formatting issues, specifically the chapter start drop caps, which were not proper drops, and so it created an uneven amount of line spacing from the first line to the second. There was a typo or two -- my own personal nemesis -- and a missed word or two. But the issue that most concerned me and one that really affected the read "for me" was the extensive use of italics to indicate internal monolog, specifically the conflict monolog. The constant italicized interjection became jarring after a while. The true nature of a first-person narrative is that it is a reflective narrative, so italicized internal monolog is really unnecessary, especially in a narrative such as this where the narrator is already exposed to a great degree. In this case, I would have advised the author to leave it all unitalicized and to find another way to work in the internal conflict and integrate the thoughts. One could distinguish by the diction the internal “conflict” monolog from the regular First-person monolog without the telltale slanty words. This would have made the text block look better as well, and this would have restricted the italics to emphasis alone versus the use of Capitalized words, which again, to me, felt too in your face in an already in your face narrative. The italicized conflict monolog also created some paragraphing issues, where continuity was lost because the paragraph was split mid-thought to separate the internal conflict monologue from the main narrative. This separation is unnecessary and eliminating or integrating the italicized thoughts would have eliminated the excess chop -- chop that did affect the read for me and did reduce the review score somewhat. I understood what the author was trying to do in showing how disjointed Tess' mental state was during the narrative, but I thought the author's writting style did that quite effectively without the italics.
Aside from that, there was a certain ugliness to the story and the writing that came off almost poetic. The characters behave quite naturally in their world. There is a twisted very human logic to the situational conflict, and the backstory was integrated nicely: The balance between scene and summary was almost flawless, and although it might have seemed like everything set Tess off into flashback mode so she could revel in her own personal drama, it only reaffirmed her obsessive personality to me. The sex scenes were fluid in their emotive content -- innocent, yet deceptively insecure -- and they weren’t graphic or porn-speak laden -- thank goodness. Here the sex scenes are used very deftly to draw out the pathos of our main character as all good sex scenes in literary works are designed to do. Good show!
There are some really touching moments in the story -- very pure uninhibited emotion -- and there are some relationship moments where every reader will roll over in hysterical laughter at the idiocy of it all. Brian has his share of emotional wounds too: his out-of-control younger sister Rachel whom he plays the father figure to, a loser of a father, and the bevy of young babes he bedded during a male angst crisis seem to haunt him throughout the narrative. So the mismatched coupling of Tess and Brian works to the advantage of the story in a misery-loves-company/watching-the-train-wreck kind of way. What reader doesn’t love a good train wreck? This is the kind of story one might see on an episode of Intervention. So if you like deluded self-destructive characters, love desperation -- desperation makes people think about and do crazy things -- and love a narrator whose personality has been soaked in vinegar, then this book is for you. Even still, Tess has a good heart, and she has her vulnerable moments as much as she is wont to believe the mask she wears is on straight all the time:
Later that night I lit a dozen tiny candles all over my room
and we made love in my bed; slow and hot and beautiful. The
room was filled with shadows. They flickered everywhere; on the
ceiling, on the walls, on Brian’s face as it hovered gently over
mine. My heart was open wide, filled and overflowing with a
thousand fragile emotions I couldn’t even put names to. I stared
into his eyes, eyes that were glowing with dark orange light,
glowing with love and heat and the reflected flames of the candles,
and I was too overwhelmed for words or moans or sounds of any
kind. I just gazed at him, at those eyes, his hot breath on my face,
as he reached inside me and touched my soul.
In the end Tess’ prevails even through all the tragedy. I won’t be including plot spoilers here, but there was a moment where Tess finally stands up to her mother, and I could not help but cheer her on. Later she shares a moment with Brian’s sister Rachel that was absolutely excruciating to read, and the end of the book is a bit tense before the happily-ever-after wrap up. Let’s just say that fate and choice make for a bad coupling in this story. Action, reaction, and consequence, that’s what the story is about here … and God has little to do with it. So, if you like a real story, from a real woman’s point of view, about real life, and real relationships, and real womanly angst with all its unbearable messiness, then put the bleach away and sit down with this book. Despite the ugliness on the surface, it’s got real womanly grit, and I like that. It’s a story about survival, about surviving the perception we have been force-fed about ourselves and others. We all know that that sort of survival is rarely pretty, but it’s inspiring nonetheless.
To match the personality of the narrator, the narrative itself is very coarse. Tess just says what’s on her mind, and at times, it can be quite melodramatic. There is a fondness for choppy little fragmented thoughts and sentences that becomes noticeable right away. I felt it alluded to the character’s choppy, abrupt, and rather disjointed attitude about her own life and her own identity, but the chop might wear on some readers after a while because everything is so disconnected and at the same time completely exposed. Some might even say that Tess is a bit over exposed, and I would agree with that, but first person narratives with this type of story arc tend to feel self-indulgent, and so I felt the tell it all, here I am, and if you don’t like it go fuck yourself self-exploratory narrative was important to the characterization. Tess is raw, in more ways than one, and we feel it in the narrative. She is bitchy and vulgar on the surface in order to cover up deep-seated feelings of inadequacy, which she obsesses over endlessly to the point of sabotaging anything good that comes into her life. She has a toxic personality disorder, and some readers might find themselves disenchanted with her about half way through the book. I had a similar issue with Love and Other Natural Disasters by Holly Shumas, as the narrator’s neurosis was similar to Tess’. Some readers might find this a bit much to warrant the exasperating number of pages devoted to Tess’ self-destructive foibles and obsessive reminiscing. A prudent cut here and there would have taken care of this issue, but I liked Tess’ honesty, so even though the narrative seemed to drag a bit here and there and her obsessing did start to wear on my nerves after a while, I still didn’t mind spending so much time with her. Even in today’s liberated society, I still see women stifling themselves on a regular basis. Tess’ neurosis was all too familiar, and so the exposition was rather refreshing.
Structurally, the story begins with a prologue and establishes the narrator’s view on God, authority, and justice in the world. I liked the crayon metaphor, and considering it was introduced so early in the piece as if it were going to be a grounding element, I was disappointed that, thematically, it wasn’t carried through the text as deliberately as I had hoped it would be for such a powerful personality statement. We get dribs and drabs but not enough to fully flesh out that side of Tess’ personality, the true artistic and visionary side, which might have been the juxtaposition the story needed to offset her persecution complex.
For the story arc, we have Tess, our narrator and recently divorced thirty-something who is struggling with the demise of her marriage -- among other issues. She decides at the start of the story to try to escape herself by making a new start in a new town -- a new town where nobody knows her or knows about her past indiscretions. Then there is Jason, her ex, who left her because she had adamantly made it known throughout their marriage that she didn’t want to have children. Of course, we find out later that that wasn’t really the reason for his divorcing her. The real reason becomes obvious the more time you spend with Tess. Then we have Tess’ Brother David and her sister-in-law Kim. They are expecting their first child, which will predictably force Tess to reassess her position on the matter. Tess’ parents are typical archetypes: the mother is a cruel cold-hearted fault-finding selfish vindictive shrew, and since I have some extensive experience with that sort of nurturing, I could relate, and the father is basically the all around nice guy doormat who is too tired to fight anymore. There is a litany of other minor characters and sub-plots all of which refract the underlying themes of the story very well.
In the first third of the narrative, Tess moves to a new town and almost immediately takes up with Brian -- the younger man who lives downstairs from her -- in an effort to use sex to drown out the pain she feels over her failed marriage and her perceived failed life, even if she can't admit that that is what she is doing. The remainder of the book deals with Tess and Brian’s relationship, his failed relationship with his alcoholic father, and his relationship with his drug-addicted troubled younger sister. Tess’ inner conflict is reflected back into the narrative as she explores her own inter-personal relationships with the people who surround her in the story. As we all do in life, when we cannot confront our own shadow, we use the lives of others to sort out our own existential dilemmas and our own personal philosophies. It’s Tess’ idiosyncratic perception of the world around her that deepens her feelings of persecution and thus drives the story. Had the narrative been written any other way other than from her point of view, I think the intensity would have been lost, as the immediate storyline is offset with random flashbacks, and the intervals are pretty frequent. This is how the backstory of Tess’ entire life is revealed for the most part -- indulgent yes, but for Tess, it works.
As far as the technical stuff goes: I noticed a few fiddly punctuation issues: In this font the em-dashes seemed the same size as hyphens and not proper em-dashes, so reading those sentences made the eyes go a mite bit buggy because the sentences seemed confusing at first glance. There were some minor interior formatting issues, specifically the chapter start drop caps, which were not proper drops, and so it created an uneven amount of line spacing from the first line to the second. There was a typo or two -- my own personal nemesis -- and a missed word or two. But the issue that most concerned me and one that really affected the read "for me" was the extensive use of italics to indicate internal monolog, specifically the conflict monolog. The constant italicized interjection became jarring after a while. The true nature of a first-person narrative is that it is a reflective narrative, so italicized internal monolog is really unnecessary, especially in a narrative such as this where the narrator is already exposed to a great degree. In this case, I would have advised the author to leave it all unitalicized and to find another way to work in the internal conflict and integrate the thoughts. One could distinguish by the diction the internal “conflict” monolog from the regular First-person monolog without the telltale slanty words. This would have made the text block look better as well, and this would have restricted the italics to emphasis alone versus the use of Capitalized words, which again, to me, felt too in your face in an already in your face narrative. The italicized conflict monolog also created some paragraphing issues, where continuity was lost because the paragraph was split mid-thought to separate the internal conflict monologue from the main narrative. This separation is unnecessary and eliminating or integrating the italicized thoughts would have eliminated the excess chop -- chop that did affect the read for me and did reduce the review score somewhat. I understood what the author was trying to do in showing how disjointed Tess' mental state was during the narrative, but I thought the author's writting style did that quite effectively without the italics.
Aside from that, there was a certain ugliness to the story and the writing that came off almost poetic. The characters behave quite naturally in their world. There is a twisted very human logic to the situational conflict, and the backstory was integrated nicely: The balance between scene and summary was almost flawless, and although it might have seemed like everything set Tess off into flashback mode so she could revel in her own personal drama, it only reaffirmed her obsessive personality to me. The sex scenes were fluid in their emotive content -- innocent, yet deceptively insecure -- and they weren’t graphic or porn-speak laden -- thank goodness. Here the sex scenes are used very deftly to draw out the pathos of our main character as all good sex scenes in literary works are designed to do. Good show!
There are some really touching moments in the story -- very pure uninhibited emotion -- and there are some relationship moments where every reader will roll over in hysterical laughter at the idiocy of it all. Brian has his share of emotional wounds too: his out-of-control younger sister Rachel whom he plays the father figure to, a loser of a father, and the bevy of young babes he bedded during a male angst crisis seem to haunt him throughout the narrative. So the mismatched coupling of Tess and Brian works to the advantage of the story in a misery-loves-company/watching-the-train-wreck kind of way. What reader doesn’t love a good train wreck? This is the kind of story one might see on an episode of Intervention. So if you like deluded self-destructive characters, love desperation -- desperation makes people think about and do crazy things -- and love a narrator whose personality has been soaked in vinegar, then this book is for you. Even still, Tess has a good heart, and she has her vulnerable moments as much as she is wont to believe the mask she wears is on straight all the time:
Later that night I lit a dozen tiny candles all over my room
and we made love in my bed; slow and hot and beautiful. The
room was filled with shadows. They flickered everywhere; on the
ceiling, on the walls, on Brian’s face as it hovered gently over
mine. My heart was open wide, filled and overflowing with a
thousand fragile emotions I couldn’t even put names to. I stared
into his eyes, eyes that were glowing with dark orange light,
glowing with love and heat and the reflected flames of the candles,
and I was too overwhelmed for words or moans or sounds of any
kind. I just gazed at him, at those eyes, his hot breath on my face,
as he reached inside me and touched my soul.
In the end Tess’ prevails even through all the tragedy. I won’t be including plot spoilers here, but there was a moment where Tess finally stands up to her mother, and I could not help but cheer her on. Later she shares a moment with Brian’s sister Rachel that was absolutely excruciating to read, and the end of the book is a bit tense before the happily-ever-after wrap up. Let’s just say that fate and choice make for a bad coupling in this story. Action, reaction, and consequence, that’s what the story is about here … and God has little to do with it. So, if you like a real story, from a real woman’s point of view, about real life, and real relationships, and real womanly angst with all its unbearable messiness, then put the bleach away and sit down with this book. Despite the ugliness on the surface, it’s got real womanly grit, and I like that. It’s a story about survival, about surviving the perception we have been force-fed about ourselves and others. We all know that that sort of survival is rarely pretty, but it’s inspiring nonetheless.
July 11, 2015
It’s been a long time since I threw common sense to the wind and stayed up to finish a book knowing how much I had to do the next day, but not resenting it the next day because it was totally worth it.
This book has no spiffy genre classification. After some thought, I think I’d call it ‘literary romance.’ I don’t know what ‘women’s fiction’ is and I’m not sure I really even know what ‘chick lit’ is, but I’m pretty sure it’s not either of those. And you know, lately, I’ve been very happy with the books that haven’t been easily classified.
Here’s the blurb:
It’s not the kind of pain she can see and smell and wrap with an ace bandage. It’s the kind she tries to numb with sex and work and cleaning-cleaning-cleaning the house. The kind that comes from enduring a lifetime of rejection. First from her mother’whom Tess knows would have aborted her had the law allowed it’then from a string of men whose names she can never remember. And finally, at age thirty-four, from her husband of ten years; the man who once promised to love her forever.
You want angst? I gotcher angst right here, pal. And this is the good stuff, the kind that jerks you around and bashes you over the head and makes you come back for more to see how it all ends. In my experience with literary fiction (one of which was an Oprah pick’sue me), there seems to be some sort of unwritten rule about writing angst, which is to understate it, to let the subtleties of the angst dawn on the reader like a sunrise behind storm clouds.
Problem with that approach is that A) I don’t ever get to know or care about the characters enough to care about their angst and B) their angst isn’t that big of a deal anyway; if the characters clearly don’t care about their angst, why should I? So I’ll read literary fiction, don’t get me wrong, but later, I’ll scratch my head and say (if asked), ‘Yeah, I think I read that book, but I don’t remember the name or the author.’ I just remember dipping my toe in the wading pool of that world once upon a time.
The main character, Tess, has angst and she doesn’t seem to care about her angst, either. But I cared about her angst from the very first paragraph:
They say actions speak louder than words. Maybe. But words do a hell of a lot more damage. Even well-meaning words spoken by well-meaning people.
People like Sister Patricia Mary Theriault. She was my catechism teacher when I was seven years old. Until she ruined my life. [...:]
Then she told us about the bad soil. [...:] But the only bad soil I heard about was this:
‘As the Sower was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on and’’
Path. Trampled. Bad soil. [...:]
‘Don’t let your hearts become trampled down, children. Keep them soft and fertile so you can feel God’s love inside of you.’
Seven years old. And already I knew I was in some deep shit. The kind that even Sister Patricia couldn’t do anything about.
The twin hyperbolic allegories of ‘until she ruined my life’ and ‘Seven years old. And already I knew I was in some deep shit’ are not, actually, hyperbolic or allegorical, but the reader doesn’t find out why or how until far, far into the book.
You might be tempted to point out that this is simply excellent fiction infrastructure, to which I would say’yeah, I know. But I don’t see that a whole lot anymore. As far as I can tell, the current writing fad is to make me, Random Reader, ask the question and then never let it linger like a good combination of spices on my tongue or let me savor the moment of enlightenment when/if it happens.
Instead, it will ask the question and proceed to answer it for me 2 pages later and sometimes, even worse, will over-explain it in case I didn’t get it fast enough or thoroughly digest all the layers of subtext. I’m very tired of being treated like an idiot in my fiction and, further, I hate that I actually have to call attention to this amazingly annoying trend.
There are quite a few laugh-out-loud lines, sharp. Wry.
When Tess, age 34, takes Brian, age 25, as a lover, they finish, talk, then begin again not long after. Tess observes,
Ready again. Twenty-five. Gotta love that.
Keller also gives the reader glimpses of the spirituality that’s woven all through the tale; they glimmer, like the gold threads in shot fabric:
The stars, he said, were actually souls; all the souls that were too restless to be locked up in heaven. They were so restless that God let them stay outside at night to play.
And when an 8-year-old girl about to take her first communion asks Tess if she believes in God, Tess says:
‘Yes, I believe in God. I just’I don’t feel close to him in church.’
‘Really? Why’s that?’
I shrugged, even though I knew exactly why. I knew because I’d felt that way since I was a little girl, sitting in my church clothes, listening to the Mass. Trying to feel His presence. Struggling to feel His love. But there was nothing there. Nothing but words I didn’t completely understand and scary status. And then, one beautiful Sunday Spring morning when I was nine years old, something occurred to me. Something I never told anyone else.
He’s not really in here. God doesn’t live inside a building, and that’s all a church is; just a building filled with lots of words. [...:]
Because Anne [of Green Gables:] said that if she really wanted to talk to God, a real true prayer, then she’d have to go outside to do it. She’s need to surround herself with God’s creation, with His beauty; drink it in and let it fill her up. And then she could look heavenward and just feel a prayer.
The narrative itself is choppy, with sentences and paragraphs written in fits and starts, which perfectly mirrors Tess’s personality and her coping mechanisms (particularly her ‘personality disorder’). In fact, a good portion of Tess’s internal dialog and her observations are written as wry asides to herself and she is inviting you, Random Reader, to chuckle along with her.
And I did. Even while I had tears running down my cheeks.
This book has no spiffy genre classification. After some thought, I think I’d call it ‘literary romance.’ I don’t know what ‘women’s fiction’ is and I’m not sure I really even know what ‘chick lit’ is, but I’m pretty sure it’s not either of those. And you know, lately, I’ve been very happy with the books that haven’t been easily classified.
Here’s the blurb:
It’s not the kind of pain she can see and smell and wrap with an ace bandage. It’s the kind she tries to numb with sex and work and cleaning-cleaning-cleaning the house. The kind that comes from enduring a lifetime of rejection. First from her mother’whom Tess knows would have aborted her had the law allowed it’then from a string of men whose names she can never remember. And finally, at age thirty-four, from her husband of ten years; the man who once promised to love her forever.
You want angst? I gotcher angst right here, pal. And this is the good stuff, the kind that jerks you around and bashes you over the head and makes you come back for more to see how it all ends. In my experience with literary fiction (one of which was an Oprah pick’sue me), there seems to be some sort of unwritten rule about writing angst, which is to understate it, to let the subtleties of the angst dawn on the reader like a sunrise behind storm clouds.
Problem with that approach is that A) I don’t ever get to know or care about the characters enough to care about their angst and B) their angst isn’t that big of a deal anyway; if the characters clearly don’t care about their angst, why should I? So I’ll read literary fiction, don’t get me wrong, but later, I’ll scratch my head and say (if asked), ‘Yeah, I think I read that book, but I don’t remember the name or the author.’ I just remember dipping my toe in the wading pool of that world once upon a time.
The main character, Tess, has angst and she doesn’t seem to care about her angst, either. But I cared about her angst from the very first paragraph:
They say actions speak louder than words. Maybe. But words do a hell of a lot more damage. Even well-meaning words spoken by well-meaning people.
People like Sister Patricia Mary Theriault. She was my catechism teacher when I was seven years old. Until she ruined my life. [...:]
Then she told us about the bad soil. [...:] But the only bad soil I heard about was this:
‘As the Sower was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on and’’
Path. Trampled. Bad soil. [...:]
‘Don’t let your hearts become trampled down, children. Keep them soft and fertile so you can feel God’s love inside of you.’
Seven years old. And already I knew I was in some deep shit. The kind that even Sister Patricia couldn’t do anything about.
The twin hyperbolic allegories of ‘until she ruined my life’ and ‘Seven years old. And already I knew I was in some deep shit’ are not, actually, hyperbolic or allegorical, but the reader doesn’t find out why or how until far, far into the book.
You might be tempted to point out that this is simply excellent fiction infrastructure, to which I would say’yeah, I know. But I don’t see that a whole lot anymore. As far as I can tell, the current writing fad is to make me, Random Reader, ask the question and then never let it linger like a good combination of spices on my tongue or let me savor the moment of enlightenment when/if it happens.
Instead, it will ask the question and proceed to answer it for me 2 pages later and sometimes, even worse, will over-explain it in case I didn’t get it fast enough or thoroughly digest all the layers of subtext. I’m very tired of being treated like an idiot in my fiction and, further, I hate that I actually have to call attention to this amazingly annoying trend.
There are quite a few laugh-out-loud lines, sharp. Wry.
When Tess, age 34, takes Brian, age 25, as a lover, they finish, talk, then begin again not long after. Tess observes,
Ready again. Twenty-five. Gotta love that.
Keller also gives the reader glimpses of the spirituality that’s woven all through the tale; they glimmer, like the gold threads in shot fabric:
The stars, he said, were actually souls; all the souls that were too restless to be locked up in heaven. They were so restless that God let them stay outside at night to play.
And when an 8-year-old girl about to take her first communion asks Tess if she believes in God, Tess says:
‘Yes, I believe in God. I just’I don’t feel close to him in church.’
‘Really? Why’s that?’
I shrugged, even though I knew exactly why. I knew because I’d felt that way since I was a little girl, sitting in my church clothes, listening to the Mass. Trying to feel His presence. Struggling to feel His love. But there was nothing there. Nothing but words I didn’t completely understand and scary status. And then, one beautiful Sunday Spring morning when I was nine years old, something occurred to me. Something I never told anyone else.
He’s not really in here. God doesn’t live inside a building, and that’s all a church is; just a building filled with lots of words. [...:]
Because Anne [of Green Gables:] said that if she really wanted to talk to God, a real true prayer, then she’d have to go outside to do it. She’s need to surround herself with God’s creation, with His beauty; drink it in and let it fill her up. And then she could look heavenward and just feel a prayer.
The narrative itself is choppy, with sentences and paragraphs written in fits and starts, which perfectly mirrors Tess’s personality and her coping mechanisms (particularly her ‘personality disorder’). In fact, a good portion of Tess’s internal dialog and her observations are written as wry asides to herself and she is inviting you, Random Reader, to chuckle along with her.
And I did. Even while I had tears running down my cheeks.
June 12, 2018
Love it.
I really loved this oh so simple yet oh so deep so passionate story about love, about life about hurt and joy. I felt Tess’s every emotion and wanted her to win. She deserved to win, a lifetime of happiness after all the pain. The authors descriptions were so vivid I felt I was walking every step and feeling every emotion. Just simply loved this book.
I really loved this oh so simple yet oh so deep so passionate story about love, about life about hurt and joy. I felt Tess’s every emotion and wanted her to win. She deserved to win, a lifetime of happiness after all the pain. The authors descriptions were so vivid I felt I was walking every step and feeling every emotion. Just simply loved this book.
January 2, 2025
Somewhat predictable, overall good thriller
September 17, 2024
One of my all-time favorite books. During my first read, I couldn’t bring myself to finish it because I didn’t want the story to end. This past year, I finally pushed through, and the ending was absolutely worth it. Be sure to have some tissues on hand, as this story will definitely tug at your heartstrings.
5/5
5/5
June 3, 2013
I don’t use “white trash” in conversation, don’t generally label people, or groups of people, or see them in such a one-dimensional way, but I have to use “white trash” here because I understand what it's supposed to mean, what people think it is, and how they look at “those people”… and I appreciate the way R.J. Keller offers a deep exploration of “those people.”
First, here: a “white trash” definition offered at the blog WhiteTrash.net:
“…a racial epithet usually used to describe certain low income persons of European descent, especially those perceived as having crude manners, abnormally low moral standards, and lack of education.”
Well. If I’m not one of “them” now, I sure used to be. When I lived where I lived and did what I did. Or didn’t do.
And I think the characters in R.J. Keller’s Waiting for Spring are people those who use that particular pejorative would call “white trash,” too.
What I love about Waiting for Spring is that Keller’s small-town Maine “white trash”-ians are examined so closely and so honestly that – even if it wasn’t her goal – Keller’s readers get a quick lesson in people-are-people, whether a first-impression glance leaves you thinking they’re “white trash” with dirty jobs or sophisticates who might nibble shiny, little fish eggs in the Hamptons.
I shouldn’t admit, here, because I’m a female fiction writer, that I don’t read much of what would be called “women’s fiction.” What I mean, though, is that I don’t read much fiction written by women that uses, in an obvious way, any of the following as the central conflict in an overt attempt to tug at the heart strings:
1. Death
2. Disease (namely cancer)
3. Depression (or other mental maladies)
4. Children/families
5. Abuse (rape, spousal beatings, or the like)
It’s not snobbery; I’m just not drawn to it. It’s possible I got my fill during my Danielle Steel years.
Keller’s novel, however, isn’t the kind of fiction by women I usually pass by. Instead, it’s the gritty and straightforward and honest fiction I love. The kind of fiction that doesn’t care to pretend politeness out of respect for people’s personal beliefs or subjective morality. It is what it is, whether you like it or not.
Sure…in Waiting for Spring, Keller’s characters have been touched by life’s unpleasantness (drugs, emotional neglect, abuse), but those touches are presented as scenery, the way a dark spot in the forest would look on a drive down a country road. We notice it, it’s there, it affects the larger picture, but we’re not consumed by it. Life is life, and almost everyone, at one point or another, has suffered from something. A life wouldn’t read realistic without giving those sufferings mention and recognizing they add to, and take away from, who a person is.
Keller’s novel is character-driven, and her characters – so real, and revealed to such a degree it’s difficult not to wince at their vulnerability and feel the need to walk away, apologize for prying – create a powerful story of strength and weakness, untidy but pure love, and both the destructive nature and the beauty of human bonds. And they remind us – as we so often need to be reminded – that as unique as we like to fantasize we are, none of us is really so different from the other.
First, here: a “white trash” definition offered at the blog WhiteTrash.net:
“…a racial epithet usually used to describe certain low income persons of European descent, especially those perceived as having crude manners, abnormally low moral standards, and lack of education.”
Well. If I’m not one of “them” now, I sure used to be. When I lived where I lived and did what I did. Or didn’t do.
And I think the characters in R.J. Keller’s Waiting for Spring are people those who use that particular pejorative would call “white trash,” too.
What I love about Waiting for Spring is that Keller’s small-town Maine “white trash”-ians are examined so closely and so honestly that – even if it wasn’t her goal – Keller’s readers get a quick lesson in people-are-people, whether a first-impression glance leaves you thinking they’re “white trash” with dirty jobs or sophisticates who might nibble shiny, little fish eggs in the Hamptons.
I shouldn’t admit, here, because I’m a female fiction writer, that I don’t read much of what would be called “women’s fiction.” What I mean, though, is that I don’t read much fiction written by women that uses, in an obvious way, any of the following as the central conflict in an overt attempt to tug at the heart strings:
1. Death
2. Disease (namely cancer)
3. Depression (or other mental maladies)
4. Children/families
5. Abuse (rape, spousal beatings, or the like)
It’s not snobbery; I’m just not drawn to it. It’s possible I got my fill during my Danielle Steel years.
Keller’s novel, however, isn’t the kind of fiction by women I usually pass by. Instead, it’s the gritty and straightforward and honest fiction I love. The kind of fiction that doesn’t care to pretend politeness out of respect for people’s personal beliefs or subjective morality. It is what it is, whether you like it or not.
Sure…in Waiting for Spring, Keller’s characters have been touched by life’s unpleasantness (drugs, emotional neglect, abuse), but those touches are presented as scenery, the way a dark spot in the forest would look on a drive down a country road. We notice it, it’s there, it affects the larger picture, but we’re not consumed by it. Life is life, and almost everyone, at one point or another, has suffered from something. A life wouldn’t read realistic without giving those sufferings mention and recognizing they add to, and take away from, who a person is.
Keller’s novel is character-driven, and her characters – so real, and revealed to such a degree it’s difficult not to wince at their vulnerability and feel the need to walk away, apologize for prying – create a powerful story of strength and weakness, untidy but pure love, and both the destructive nature and the beauty of human bonds. And they remind us – as we so often need to be reminded – that as unique as we like to fantasize we are, none of us is really so different from the other.
July 14, 2010
The feeling I have after reading “Waiting for Spring” by RJ Keller is one of hopefulness.
Immediately after meeting the main character, Tess, I had a feeling of connection with her. She is an ordinary middle-aged woman who has some baggage she carries around (like the rest of us) and some deep-seeded fears just waiting to come out.
From her mother she gets nothing but hatred…about messing up her plans for life, about Tess’s ill attempt at marriage and the decision she made about not wanting kids which results in her divorce and about a secret the two share, but never discuss.
From her father, who she believes never loved her mother, she gets nothing but excuses and ignored. She feels like he has given up on life and wants nothing more than for him to be happy again.
When Tess’s husband wakes up at thirty-five and decides he wants a family--the one thing Tess never wanted--(Or does she?) she runs away into the arms of another man, but only for one night. Unfortunately a divorce is imminent.
Tess moves on to a new town, but all of her “problems” follow her. And as she tries to start over more and more “problems”, some hers and some from the people she meets, continue to follow her. But they all disappear when she is having sex with Brian.
Although Brian and Tess are in love, old responsibilities and life get in the way. Neither is strong enough to forget and just live in the moment. Fear is the underlying factor that both must conquer. Fear that they are not perfect.
The internal struggle to be the best you can be is scattered all through the book. Fear and past decisions weigh heavy on every character. So much so that they aren’t living their own lives, they are living how others think they should. Sometimes we as humans keep things inside, deep down, away from others, hoping these demons will go away on their own. Most times they don’t, they just get buried deeper, making it even harder to relate to day to day occurrences. The same happens here.
Through it all Tess just wants to be accepted and loved and happy once again.
And she holds on for Spring to arrive, because winter means death (like the barren trees and lack of colors), while Spring brings new life and the colors that she loves, just like the best present she ever received as a child--a 72 pack of crayons with names of colors that she never heard of before.
The story is typical--hardship, love, broken love and starting over. The writing of RJ Keller is not. It is a well written, heart wrenching portrayal of a woman who knows she deserves more than the hand she was dealt. The inner thoughts of Tess are put into sentences, letting you understand what she is thinking, even as she is saying something completely different. Once I started reading, I couldn’t put the book down. This is just another example of an author, not well-known, who should be. The characters, the plot and the ending all make this a book well worth reading.
Immediately after meeting the main character, Tess, I had a feeling of connection with her. She is an ordinary middle-aged woman who has some baggage she carries around (like the rest of us) and some deep-seeded fears just waiting to come out.
From her mother she gets nothing but hatred…about messing up her plans for life, about Tess’s ill attempt at marriage and the decision she made about not wanting kids which results in her divorce and about a secret the two share, but never discuss.
From her father, who she believes never loved her mother, she gets nothing but excuses and ignored. She feels like he has given up on life and wants nothing more than for him to be happy again.
When Tess’s husband wakes up at thirty-five and decides he wants a family--the one thing Tess never wanted--(Or does she?) she runs away into the arms of another man, but only for one night. Unfortunately a divorce is imminent.
Tess moves on to a new town, but all of her “problems” follow her. And as she tries to start over more and more “problems”, some hers and some from the people she meets, continue to follow her. But they all disappear when she is having sex with Brian.
Although Brian and Tess are in love, old responsibilities and life get in the way. Neither is strong enough to forget and just live in the moment. Fear is the underlying factor that both must conquer. Fear that they are not perfect.
The internal struggle to be the best you can be is scattered all through the book. Fear and past decisions weigh heavy on every character. So much so that they aren’t living their own lives, they are living how others think they should. Sometimes we as humans keep things inside, deep down, away from others, hoping these demons will go away on their own. Most times they don’t, they just get buried deeper, making it even harder to relate to day to day occurrences. The same happens here.
Through it all Tess just wants to be accepted and loved and happy once again.
And she holds on for Spring to arrive, because winter means death (like the barren trees and lack of colors), while Spring brings new life and the colors that she loves, just like the best present she ever received as a child--a 72 pack of crayons with names of colors that she never heard of before.
The story is typical--hardship, love, broken love and starting over. The writing of RJ Keller is not. It is a well written, heart wrenching portrayal of a woman who knows she deserves more than the hand she was dealt. The inner thoughts of Tess are put into sentences, letting you understand what she is thinking, even as she is saying something completely different. Once I started reading, I couldn’t put the book down. This is just another example of an author, not well-known, who should be. The characters, the plot and the ending all make this a book well worth reading.
May 13, 2011
It's one of those things you do as an independent writer. You offer to read other people's self-published books and write a review because you need to support each other. Added to that, the author is a friend of a friend of a friend and you kind of virtually know each other, so you want to do the right thing.
So, groaning inside, I offered to read a virtual friend's eBook. The cover art looked dull and not promising and then I remember, my cover art isn't so hot either. Good cover art is difficult to come by when you're an Indie. The story didn't seem to be my normal reading...not that I have narrow tastes but this didn't seem to be a fit.
But I'd made a promise. So I started reading.
Waiting for Spring is indeed outside my usual genres but Keller's characters got their claws into me. They slipped off the page and burrowed into my brain as people I knew and cared about. The story itself is gritty and raw and so real I swear that Keller followed me around and implanted a recording device in my head, capturing my own thoughts and experiences as I dealt with my ex-husband and my own childhood issues.
I kept thinking, how much longer can this story go on, because it's so real? What else could possibly happen? And it was obvious. Nothing good could happen. So, one day I avoided the book, because I didn't want to know what bad things would happen to Tess. She had become more than a two-dimensional character. She was me. She was my best-friend in high school, the one who popped a bunch of niacin to get the crank out of her system before the impending drug test she faced. But at the end of the day Tess called to me and I had to know what happened to her. It was a story I couldn't stay away from.
Waiting for Spring made me laugh. It made me angry. More than once it made me blush and then concede, "Yea, that's how it is." And more than once I cried, though I tried desperately not to. As soon as it was over I wondered what the second book would bring and nearly decided not to read it whenever it comes out because I don't want to know when anything else bad happens to Tess.
But I will buy it because I know Tess, she is so strikingly solid, as are all of Keller's characters, that she cannot be ignored.
Keller's powers of observation and her ability to communicate that to the written page are stunning and unsettling. If you have lived a life of any kind of hardship you will feel as though Keller was there, hiding in the bushes, taking notes. I told my husband, "What Gabaldon does with minute, physical detail Keller does with emotional detail. And sometimes it feels a little too personal, as though she's airing my own dirty laundry."
But dirt and grit and all, you can't help but love Tess.
So, groaning inside, I offered to read a virtual friend's eBook. The cover art looked dull and not promising and then I remember, my cover art isn't so hot either. Good cover art is difficult to come by when you're an Indie. The story didn't seem to be my normal reading...not that I have narrow tastes but this didn't seem to be a fit.
But I'd made a promise. So I started reading.
Waiting for Spring is indeed outside my usual genres but Keller's characters got their claws into me. They slipped off the page and burrowed into my brain as people I knew and cared about. The story itself is gritty and raw and so real I swear that Keller followed me around and implanted a recording device in my head, capturing my own thoughts and experiences as I dealt with my ex-husband and my own childhood issues.
I kept thinking, how much longer can this story go on, because it's so real? What else could possibly happen? And it was obvious. Nothing good could happen. So, one day I avoided the book, because I didn't want to know what bad things would happen to Tess. She had become more than a two-dimensional character. She was me. She was my best-friend in high school, the one who popped a bunch of niacin to get the crank out of her system before the impending drug test she faced. But at the end of the day Tess called to me and I had to know what happened to her. It was a story I couldn't stay away from.
Waiting for Spring made me laugh. It made me angry. More than once it made me blush and then concede, "Yea, that's how it is." And more than once I cried, though I tried desperately not to. As soon as it was over I wondered what the second book would bring and nearly decided not to read it whenever it comes out because I don't want to know when anything else bad happens to Tess.
But I will buy it because I know Tess, she is so strikingly solid, as are all of Keller's characters, that she cannot be ignored.
Keller's powers of observation and her ability to communicate that to the written page are stunning and unsettling. If you have lived a life of any kind of hardship you will feel as though Keller was there, hiding in the bushes, taking notes. I told my husband, "What Gabaldon does with minute, physical detail Keller does with emotional detail. And sometimes it feels a little too personal, as though she's airing my own dirty laundry."
But dirt and grit and all, you can't help but love Tess.
October 8, 2010
I don't like the name Spring....End of story. Really, it IS the end of the story.
No, really, why didn't I love this book, with it's great idea and Halmarky sentiments?
Well obviously the name Spring at the end was pretty much an "Ew, thanks for trying to be one of those celebrities and name your child something fantastically retartded" I didn't like that the name had so much irony; with the title and the main theme of the book. Don't get me wrong, I love the theme thing, I love that the author took the renewal of spring and kind of ran with it and went through the whole book.
And the questions throughout the book was: How many times can these people have sex? and How many times can they drop the F bomb? Now don't get me wrong I know some people have sex non stop, some of them being prostitutes, not that Tess or Brian are Prostitutes--I'm just throwing that idea out there, and some people really do drop the f bomb like leaves during fall. I just got a little tired of it by the end of the book.
One other thing that bugged me was the predictability of the book. Oh, Tess and Brian have sex? Rachel ends up getting murdered and Brian goes into a black part in his life and breaks up with Tess, even though they're the only ones that the other is ever going to love? Now who that has seen a Lifetime/Halmark movie hasn't seen that coming?
What I did like about the book. The running theme of spring and renewal of numerous things and people, Tess being one of them. I do like that Tess found someone as stable as Brian, she needed him, even if he was quite a bit younger than her. I like that Brian wasn't necessarily corrupted by Tess. He came that way. I also like the different kinds of people that were in the novel, as predictable as they were at times.
I also liked that Tess was loyal to Rachel. Rachel needed someone to trust and that happened to be Tess. I don't know if Tess did the right thing necessarily but how am I to know, I haven't been in that situation.
Another thing that I liked was that Tess learned that not every relationship was crap. With her track record with her mother and her ex-husband, it would have been easy for her to give up on the human race all together, but she is a strong enough person to keep going and find someone, even if he was just sex to her at the beginning.
No, really, why didn't I love this book, with it's great idea and Halmarky sentiments?
Well obviously the name Spring at the end was pretty much an "Ew, thanks for trying to be one of those celebrities and name your child something fantastically retartded" I didn't like that the name had so much irony; with the title and the main theme of the book. Don't get me wrong, I love the theme thing, I love that the author took the renewal of spring and kind of ran with it and went through the whole book.
And the questions throughout the book was: How many times can these people have sex? and How many times can they drop the F bomb? Now don't get me wrong I know some people have sex non stop, some of them being prostitutes, not that Tess or Brian are Prostitutes--I'm just throwing that idea out there, and some people really do drop the f bomb like leaves during fall. I just got a little tired of it by the end of the book.
One other thing that bugged me was the predictability of the book. Oh, Tess and Brian have sex? Rachel ends up getting murdered and Brian goes into a black part in his life and breaks up with Tess, even though they're the only ones that the other is ever going to love? Now who that has seen a Lifetime/Halmark movie hasn't seen that coming?
What I did like about the book. The running theme of spring and renewal of numerous things and people, Tess being one of them. I do like that Tess found someone as stable as Brian, she needed him, even if he was quite a bit younger than her. I like that Brian wasn't necessarily corrupted by Tess. He came that way. I also like the different kinds of people that were in the novel, as predictable as they were at times.
I also liked that Tess was loyal to Rachel. Rachel needed someone to trust and that happened to be Tess. I don't know if Tess did the right thing necessarily but how am I to know, I haven't been in that situation.
Another thing that I liked was that Tess learned that not every relationship was crap. With her track record with her mother and her ex-husband, it would have been easy for her to give up on the human race all together, but she is a strong enough person to keep going and find someone, even if he was just sex to her at the beginning.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 10, 2010
Tess Dyer not only waits for spring, she is waiting for much else, in this leisurely novel which explores various aspects of contemporary family and parenthood, love and community, and the impact on them of addictions (of various sorts) and self-destructive behavior. Tess’s mood is as bleak, her emotions as frozen as winter in an isolated Maine community, to which she has fled following upon divorce, to try and build something of a new life for herself. There she finds friends – and lovers as well – most of whom have just as many problems as she does. She has not escaped life, in coming to a new place, renting her own apartment, taking up a new job, and developing a circle of new friends. She has just replaced all the old problems with new ones, but the novel also focuses on how she grew and came to deal with them, in slightly less self-punishing ways than previously.
The reasons behind Tess’ unhappiness, her divorce, and her dysfunctional childhood as well as much else about the demons which drive her are revealed at a deliberate pace, and with considerable skill. They are shown, or rather unfolded for the reader to discover, by Tess herself, a gritty, witty and seemingly tough survivor, who cleans homes and offices for a living and lives for art and love. Failing love, she has settled, over and over again, for sex and has enough self-knowledge to know there is something wrong, something unhealthy about that. Tess’s voice, and the characters of her friends and family that she sketches for the reader have considerable charm;; otherwise this book might have seemed appropriate fodder for – if not Jerry Springer, than Oprah, at the very least. This book is told in first-person, which gives a very immediate feel to what Tess experiences and feels, but which also limits any exploration of how other characters react to her, save filtered through her own perceptions. Why do other characters in Tess’s world love and trust her? That question is scanted, but it is more a reflection on the way this story is told than any shortcoming of the authors’.
The reasons behind Tess’ unhappiness, her divorce, and her dysfunctional childhood as well as much else about the demons which drive her are revealed at a deliberate pace, and with considerable skill. They are shown, or rather unfolded for the reader to discover, by Tess herself, a gritty, witty and seemingly tough survivor, who cleans homes and offices for a living and lives for art and love. Failing love, she has settled, over and over again, for sex and has enough self-knowledge to know there is something wrong, something unhealthy about that. Tess’s voice, and the characters of her friends and family that she sketches for the reader have considerable charm;; otherwise this book might have seemed appropriate fodder for – if not Jerry Springer, than Oprah, at the very least. This book is told in first-person, which gives a very immediate feel to what Tess experiences and feels, but which also limits any exploration of how other characters react to her, save filtered through her own perceptions. Why do other characters in Tess’s world love and trust her? That question is scanted, but it is more a reflection on the way this story is told than any shortcoming of the authors’.
November 4, 2012
I seriously thought that I was going to fall into depression by the time I finished this book. I'm half-kidding. I also thought that I was going to absolutely hate it by the time I'm done, but surprisingly, I don't. Confused? I am, too.
When I started it I was kind of annoyed with Keller's style of writing. There were a LOT of staccato sentences and it kind of pissed me off. But once I got to the second chapter, I got used to it because I think I got drawn in. Drawn in on the lead's world, her feelings and problems.
I applaud the author for effectively luring you in on the depths of the lead's emotions and making you see just how badly she is hurting and how much she is trying to hold it all in. By half of the book I literally hurt every time Tess went through something difficult and then she'd breathe deeply, wait a few seconds, and push all the hurt in. I sympathized with her. I really did, and that's rare for me to do for just a character in a book.
That is not to say that I don't have any problems with this book. I do. I hated that Rachel went through the abortion, and Tess told her that she "did the right thing", even though it was killing both of their conscience. I also hated her little talk with God, where she stood on a hood of a car and screamed at Him to punish HER, not Rachel. And she supposedly heard God tell her, "you're just not worth it". That is just so wrong, because out of everyone God's the one who will always love her the most. But that's out of my Christian knowledge and this book definitely isn't Christian, so I guess I can't really hold that against it.
I liked the ending, though. Loved the last few chapters, actually, where Tess finally did something and gone through the process of healing. Overall I think this novel perfectly depicted the pain that a lot of humans have to go through. I'll have to admit, it opened my eyes a bit, especially about the drugs part. And I really have to thank RJ Keller for that.
When I started it I was kind of annoyed with Keller's style of writing. There were a LOT of staccato sentences and it kind of pissed me off. But once I got to the second chapter, I got used to it because I think I got drawn in. Drawn in on the lead's world, her feelings and problems.
I applaud the author for effectively luring you in on the depths of the lead's emotions and making you see just how badly she is hurting and how much she is trying to hold it all in. By half of the book I literally hurt every time Tess went through something difficult and then she'd breathe deeply, wait a few seconds, and push all the hurt in. I sympathized with her. I really did, and that's rare for me to do for just a character in a book.
That is not to say that I don't have any problems with this book. I do. I hated that Rachel went through the abortion, and Tess told her that she "did the right thing", even though it was killing both of their conscience. I also hated her little talk with God, where she stood on a hood of a car and screamed at Him to punish HER, not Rachel. And she supposedly heard God tell her, "you're just not worth it". That is just so wrong, because out of everyone God's the one who will always love her the most. But that's out of my Christian knowledge and this book definitely isn't Christian, so I guess I can't really hold that against it.
I liked the ending, though. Loved the last few chapters, actually, where Tess finally did something and gone through the process of healing. Overall I think this novel perfectly depicted the pain that a lot of humans have to go through. I'll have to admit, it opened my eyes a bit, especially about the drugs part. And I really have to thank RJ Keller for that.
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