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Surprised by Oxford

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A "girl-meets-God" style memoir of an agnostic who, through her surprising opportunity to study at Oxford, comes to a dynamic personal faith in God.

Carolyn Weber arrives for graduate study at Oxford University as a feminist from a loving but broken family, suspicious of men and intellectually hostile to all things religious. As she grapples with her God-shaped void alongside the friends, classmates, and professors she meets, she tackles big questions in search of love and a life that matters.

This savvy, beautifully written, credible account of Christian conversion follows the calendar and events of the school year as it entertains, informs, and promises to engage even the most skeptical and unlikely reader.

456 pages, Paperback

First published August 9, 2011

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About the author

Carolyn Weber

19 books502 followers
Hi I'm Carolyn. I taught literature to undergrads for 15 years, but resigned my tenured position in a ginormous LEAP WITH FAITH (blogpost). When I am not enjoying time with husband and 4 spirited children under 8, I enjoy reading and writing. My previous (even bigger) "leap to faith" is detailed in my book SURPRISED BY OXFORD . You can download a FREE PDF of Ch.1

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,356 reviews
Profile Image for Melanie.
528 reviews30 followers
September 6, 2011
I am not going to lie, when I saw that the memoir I had agreed to read [Surprised by Oxford] by Carolyn Weber was well over 400 pages, I was a little disappointed in having chosen this title to review. Thankfully, this book is a beautiful narrative filled with poetry and quotes from classic literature, deep and intriguing questions about meaning faith and God, and even a little bit of love and friendship thrown in for good measure. This is not a boring 400+ pages filled with an author droning on about herself, but rather a combination of stories from many different Christian academics covering various attributes of faith and God. I have never read a memoir that is less about the individual author but yet so personal.

Carolyn is a young woman who receives a scholarship to do graduate work at Oxford University. She has grown up without much of a religious background, but cannot help but search for and question meaning and faith, despite being surrounded by academics that do not always approve of these questions. I enjoyed reading her memoir, as she does not gloss over the hard questions of what being a Christian means and sometimes costs. It is not simple, and definitely not canned. While you will find classic Christian responses to faith, you will not find emotionally driven pat answers or promises of the easy “golden ticket” to faith. Carolyn is open minded and liberal in her ability to love and accept others. In fact, I think this book will frustrate many close-minded Christians, as she supports her friend who had an abortion, is buddies with a gay classmate and even quotes a professor’s religious profanity. This classic Christian, yet open-minded ability to love on her part is going to make this book offensive to many who read it! Both Christians and non-Christians will find something to offend within this memoir, but I found it to be thoughtful and provocative, and more importantly, grounded in a deep truth and honesty that transcends any of the offenses.

In fact, even though I have been a Christian for quite some time, I learned new ideas that have already transformed the way I look at life and God. If you cannot stomach reading a book of this length, please at least consider checking it out from the library and reading Chapter 10 – “Does Love Justify All.” In this chapter, Carolyn shares her memories of being privileged to sit at the high table with some of the leading politicians and scientists of the day. At this table the subject of faith and science comes up and the discussion that ensues from some very intelligent minds was life changing for me. A scientist noted for his expertise in time, space, speed, sound, and light was asked about what he thought of the relationship between spirituality and science. Everyone assumed that as a noted scientist, he obviously was not a Christian, but it later comes out that he definitely believes in the God of the Bible. Before answering completely his thoughts on the subject he points to the noted heart surgeon Dr. Inchbald who was also sitting at the table and asks what he thinks about spirituality given that he literally holds life and death in his hands so often. Dr Inchbald responds to the question of faith and science saying :“I’ve come to the conclusion that God is sovereign, even over science, and that I cannot pretend to fully know His ways. They really are mysterious, as the saying goes. And they are not of the mind of men, no matter how hard we try to wrap our minds about these ways. When I see death, I know it is wrong… really, really wrong. In-my-gut wrong… it was not meant to be. It was not meant for us. We were not built for it. Everything in my body, at a cellular level, let alone a metaphysical one, twists against it. Not just my death, but the death of every living thing.”(p. 126)
This was revolutionary for me. You see, I have always sort of thought that the opposite force from God was Satan. But that gives the devil way too much credit. No, the opposite of God, who is Life, is Death. And God had a plan through Jesus to defeat the death we brought upon ourselves and bring life again. The older I get, the more pain death brings as I lose more people that I have loved. We just accept death as inevitable, but it wasn’t intended to be. Thankfully God has fixed our mistake! The “Good News” is actually great news!
2 Timothy 1:10 …Our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel.

Romans 6:9 For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. 10 The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God.”

I have heard much of that before, but I have always thought of it in terms of good conquering evil, or holiness vs. sin. I think it is that, but much more! It is life vs. death both in this world and the kingdom to come. To put it simply, because of sin we are all dying, and stuck in death, only through Christ Jesus can we find life, meaning and ultimately happiness!

When asked that night what the greatest force in the world is, scientist Dr. Sterling said it was Love. “There is nothing more powerful, more radical, more transformational than love. No other source or substance or force… Often folks like to dismiss it as a mere emotion, but it is far more than that. It can’t be circumscribed by our desires or dictated by the whim of our moods. Not the Great Love of the Universe, as I like to call it. Not the Love that set everything in motion, keeps it in motion, which moves through all things and yet bulldozes nothing, not even our will. Try it. Just try it and you’ll see. If you love that Great Love first, because It loved you first, and then love yourself as you have been loved, and then love others from that love… Wow! Bam! Life without that kind of faith—that’s death. Therein lies the great metaphor,… Life without faith is death. For life, as it was intended to be is love.” (P. 129)

There are many quotes I would love to repeat from this book, but I will leave you with two: my favorite is “No matter what culture tells us, faith is not the opposite of reason.” (P. 147) this intelligent and thoughtful book is proof that you can be very educated and thoughtful, but also trust in Christ. Lastly “I don’t know how anyone can live, let alone die, without faith… it grounds our identity in a world that vies to define us by a million worthless things.” (p. 390) This memoir was a wonderful, poetic, thoughtful read and I highly recommend it.

Profile Image for Amy.
3,050 reviews620 followers
April 21, 2024
2024 Review
I challenged myself in 2024 to re-read the books that impacted me most in my 20s.
This was a lovely re-read. It made for a beautiful re-read. I'm far enough from my own Oxford experience to enjoy the nostalgia while also appreciating the story as it stands by itself.

2015 Review
I love Surprised by Oxford for so many reasons.
I love this book because of Oxford. On more than one occasion, I shouted to whomever happened to be closest, "St. Ebbes! That's my church!" or "New College! That my college!" Yet on an even deeper level than passing references to places I know, Caro's experience as a abroad student resounded with me. I understand getting lost, being confused by the strange pronunciations of names, even the wonder of the tutorial system. I understood Oxford and her love for it resonated for me.

I love this book because of Wordsworth, Lewis and the many other writers she quotes. Caro is friends with them all. Her love of learning and thinking is so evident. I ate it up and realized I was starving for more. She provides quotes at the beginning of chapters, references throughout her conversations, sometimes poems within the prose. Although I am not an English major, I readily understood her love for her subject because it reminded me of the giddy, reckless joy I felt when I was at Oxford studying political philosophy. This book reflects not only a scholar's heart, but a lover of learning's heart for academia.

Most of all I love this book for Caro's conversion experience. Although so different from my own, her journey to faith filled me with joy and understanding. I like that it followed through from her first blissful moments after surrendering to the often frustrating reality of the Christian life afterwards. It isn't easy. Caro is honest, vulnerable, and unafraid to express her love for God and because of that, this book breathes. It questions and answers and leaves unanswered, leaving many ideas for the reader to wrestle with in its wake. In some ways, it feels like a literary mentor because so much of what it deals with are things everyone wonders and needs to be reminded of...or at least I do.

Surprised by Oxford is thick, 400 odd pages, but worth every moment. It is worth re-reading. Highlighting. Enjoying. Perhaps for some this is a sit-down-and-read-in-a-day sort of book but for me it took three separate occasions, separated by months, to finish. I needed to digest it to move on and yet I suspect I barely skimmed the surface of what I will get out of it in the future. There is so much!
I love this book because it reawakens my love of learning. It fills me with hope. I suspect I have found a life-long friend.

PS I STRONGLY recommend Kris's review of this book! Check it out!
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
Profile Image for ladydusk.
580 reviews273 followers
October 5, 2023
Own.

Half-way point? phenomenal.

This is my third memoir of the year, and by far my favorite.

According to my blog, I read Girl Meets God by Lauren Winner almost 10 years ago. I still remember that I liked it, but didn't love it. Something seemed off.

This. This book blows it out of the water.

Carolyn Weber has written a beautiful book wrapping her confusion and questions in poetry. As a student of literature, these bits come to life as she negotiates a tumultuous conversion and first steps in faith. The mentoring she receives from mature believers are some of my favorite episodes in the book. Professors and believers take her under her wing to answer, exhort, and encourage her through every step of the way. The Providence of God comes through loud and clear through her story.

The elegance of her writing reminds me of Madeleine L'Engle. I first noted it when she was referred to as Caro early in the book, the name of the grandmother in the Austin family books. The weaving of the poetic language of the past into her own poetics is beautiful to behold and so satisfying to read.

I appreciate that this story didn't just happen to her. The view of 15 to 20 years and the maturity of faith gained in that time adds to the weight of her words. This is a sustainable life and worldview.

My one complaint is the seeming constant surprise of the idea of "thoughtful" Christianity or "intellectual" Christians. She never says that Christians in every sphere make choices based on their faith is restricted to the intellectual -- but, I found myself frustrated at times by this consistent description.

Carolyn Weber is about my age. She has children about the age of my children. I could very much identify with her (although, it has taken me to age 39 to appreciate a lot of the literature she appreciated when we were in college). I like to think that we would be friends if we knew one another in person.
Profile Image for Cindy Rollins.
Author 20 books3,382 followers
November 22, 2021
Just reread this in audio for The Literary Life Podcast interview with Carolyn Weber. Loved it even more this time around.
Profile Image for Anne Bogel.
Author 6 books83.4k followers
April 2, 2013
I'd give this one 3.5 stars if I could. I wanted to love this book; I'm afraid it may be the victim of my high expectations. My major complaint (and it's a big one) is that the LENGTHY soliloquies in the mouth of a major character just didn't ring true for me. This is memoir: it needs to feel real. But people just don't talk like this character does in the book.

Unless they do at Oxford, of course.

But I doubt it.
Profile Image for Matt.
Author 8 books1,603 followers
November 29, 2021
What an absorbing and delightful story. Has “A Severe Mercy” vibes. I couldn’t put it down.
Profile Image for Susy C. *MotherLambReads*.
552 reviews82 followers
February 16, 2024
An academic memoir of her journey through Oxford and eventually to Christ. Didn’t agree with everything she put forth, but it was a beautiful journey to behold how she found Christ. Very heavy on CS Lewis, John Milton, Homer and other quotes and influences.

💬 𝘔𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘦𝘸𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘵:𝘩𝘵𝘵𝘱𝘴://𝘸𝘸𝘸.𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘮.𝘤𝘰𝘮/𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘴/
Profile Image for Melody Schwarting.
2,133 reviews82 followers
August 8, 2023
Movie Update: Releasing September 27, 2023

Just in time for Michaelmas term, coming to a US theater near you (hopefully). Trailer here, with some familiar faces for period drama lovers! Happy to provide a little free marketing because the author was so nice when she signed my book at the movie screening last year, and I had a great time watching it. The way they adapted my favorite scene from the book was just *chef's kiss* and if that ain't my litmus test I don't know what is!

2022 Review

I first read Surprised by Oxford in late 2015/early 2016, as I returned from my own stint at Oxford University. If memory serves correctly, I started reading it on the plane immediately after finishing Surprised by Joy. Little did I know then that I would meet my future husband in a few weeks. I fell in love with him later in 2016, accepted his proposal the following year, and married him the year after that. I vaguely recall, in the early days, interpreting this new relationship through the lenses of Weber’s memoir. (My husband is a foot taller than me, so he became TBH [tall, blond, and handsome] like Weber’s Kent became TDH.)

All this to say, Surprised by Oxford arrived in my life at just the right time, soothing my soul in the way I needed most. Seven years after that magical, arduous semester, I find myself thinking of that time with less nostalgia (and regret) and with more grace and understanding. I remember what I gained, rather than what I lost, in those months. I can look with compassion on my past self and her unmet needs, and know that things get better. I can think of the beauty that remains there, not banished by darkness, interior or exterior. Weber’s memoir helped me think through this, and long ago, it helped me start to come to terms with what that period of my life has meant for my personhood.

My true love in memoirs is always those written by people who lived lives I never could. Learning and cherishing their stories is, to me, a great honor conferred by the writer on me as a reader. Yet, occasionally, coming across a memoir of a life not unlike my own helps me interpret my own life better. Surprised by Oxford is one of those rare memoirs, and I will always love it for that.

-----

A film adaptation has been made. This was one of those right place, right time books for me, and the adaptation looks visually compelling thanks to being filmed on location!
Profile Image for Carmen Miller.
96 reviews116 followers
February 7, 2023
I gave this book a good long hug when I finished it. That’s how much I loved it. I don’t even have words right now.
Profile Image for kwesi 章英狮.
292 reviews743 followers
November 30, 2011
There are times that a person will ask for his faith to God. Asking God's existence, the problem's that he is currently into, or why God did not stop evilness in the world. A normal person can't answer why God created everyone equal and why evil lurks in the earth. Maybe soon, we will be like Carolyn Weber, the girl who meets God in Oxford and how her life change.

Surprised by Oxford by Carolyn Weber, is a four-hundred-page full of questions and answers about God. Ways on how she manages to overcome her own problems and created a life full of wisdom. Like anyone of us, Carolyn Weber also experiences a life without God but there is a right time and a right place to discover love.

Carolyn Weber went to Oxford to attend college. Bringing her religious doubt and loving broken family memories. She became one of those students who met a person or people and change her life. Step by step, the darkness that surrounds her become more visible and the picture can now be seen, her future that embarrasses God fully in the end of her journey; professor, colleagues, family, books and friends that will cherish her questions with true answer from God's people.

It's hard to judge a book especially if the book talks about its religious journey in life. Everyone have its own interpretation of each passages, how to overcome it, her own point of view in life and anything under the sun. But the most interesting part of the book is when Carolyn Weber asked herself is God is a woman. This kind of issue also appears in The Shack written by William P. Young. Issues like this are usually discussed in Theology subjects and one of the interesting debates that you might join in.

Life is a cycle and sometimes we stumble in the middle of process, God lifts us and everything will change our life forever. How far can our faith reach or how far can our understanding answer every question we ask every day. The answer only lies in the Bible, the most creative non-fiction ever writing according to Carolyn Weber. I wish I can study to Oxford someday.

Special thanks to BookSneeze and to the publisher for sharing a free copy of the book.

Review posted on Old-Fashioned Reader .

Rating: Surprised by Oxford: A Memoir by Carolyn Weber, 2 Sweets

Challenges:
Book #331 for 2011
Profile Image for Kris.
1,644 reviews240 followers
April 29, 2015
Incredibly powerful. Incredibly moving. Highly personal and uncomfortably profound.

This book is about an English Major who studied in Oxford and became a Christian through her studies and conversations... Being a Christian English Major who studied at Oxford for a term, this book was highly personal and highly impactive for me. It was a long read, but still somehow a quick read. I kept wanting to find some passages tedious by nature, but then I found myself re-reading certain sentences and passages to savor the words on my tongue... to search for the layers of meaning Weber included, and find my own as well. So many times I was called up within Weber's fluid discussions, as she plumbs the depths of the great questions people are so afraid to tackle nowadays. Really I would, and should, have sat down and devoured the book in one long sitting.

Yes, it's a memoir, but it's much more than that. Weber knows how to write. She knows what the takeaway is for all the situations she includes. She doesn't get bogged down with details, but creates living portraits out of the people and ideas she's engaged with. Every time I went back to it, I found something new: a family dilemma to be wrestled with, a literary treasure to be admired and modeled, a philosophical question that had slipped in and fuddled everything up. And she knew that. Weber is real and gritty and stubborn, and knows her reader is the same.

To point out a flaw, I did notice that a lot of the secondary characters moved in and out of the narrative with little introduction or backstory. But this can hardly be a fault, considering Weber discusses so many different points in her life. There's bound to be a lot of names that have little detail behind them. But she still makes it work.

If nothing else, read this book for the bits of literature she includes. Not only are Weber's words meaningful, but the quotes and references she brings in are worth a look. I found lots of quotes to add to my collection.

"The conditions just right to create the imagination for reality."
Profile Image for Laura.
935 reviews134 followers
August 24, 2014
Listen, if you want to find a five star review of this book, it won't be hard to find. But I simply can't overlook the fact that the recalled conversations from 14 years ago (or more) simply don't ring true to me. I can't believe the memoirist can recall the setting, casual gestures, and complete conversations from her past in the detail she portrays here, which makes me believe that these conversations are largely fabricated. This explains why all her friends seem so deeply insightful and all the observations seem so symbolic. I don't doubt Weber's story at its core, I simply found myself cringing through almost every retold conversation. (I found myself constantly asking: Really!? You remember when he shrugged? Or when she looked away?)

Furthermore, Weber's "conversion" experience really comes off as more of an intellectual exercise than a humbling recognition of sin in light of the greatness of God. I couldn't really recommend this book to a person seeking to know more about Christianity, because the journey she takes to get there relies on her own idiosyncratic doubts and questions, few of which I could relate to. I couldn't really recommend it to anyone without an English degree because her casual references to poets and authors are frequent and often unexplained. I consider myself to have a slightly greater-than-average understanding of allusions to authors, but I was often not sure what point she was trying to make with her references. And why all the U2 references? I think she quote U2 more frequently than she quotes scripture.

I simply didn't find much in her 440 page story that I could relate to, cheer for, believe, or recommend to others. For me, the whole story seemed dishonest and therefore I can't really recommend it. But, looking through the reviews, it seems I am in the minority.
Profile Image for Joey R..
369 reviews829 followers
September 21, 2017
Not what I expected!

If you plan on reading this book (as I did) expecting an Oxford educated scholar to discuss apologetics and in depth analysis of Christianity — this is not the book for you. If, instead, you want to read an enjoyable book written by a very intelligent woman that describes what a year studying at Oxford is like that touches on religion and romance in equal measure then this is the book for you. Oh and a lot of poetry quotations and references that were not very enjoyable.
Profile Image for Jacqueline Knirnschild.
169 reviews15 followers
December 19, 2021
I read this book because I was genuinely curious as to why an intelligent feminist like Carolyn Weber would ever convert to Christianity, but unfortunately this book offers no such insight. Prizing fluffy descriptions of Oxford (the churches, pubs, dinners, and meandering conversations with friends) over the meat of the matter made this book seem less like a memoir and more like a hallmark movie or piece of travel writing.

At one point, early in the book, she even included a litany of questions, such as, “if God is real then why do people suffer? Why is God a man?” But instead of answering any of these questions, she simply wrote that she and this guy she just met “spent the whole night discussing,” without including any of their actual conversation. To me, this suggests that there are no answers to these questions and Christianity is a sham.

Basically, it seemed like Carolyn Weber fell for a guy who was a devout Christian, and who wouldn’t date her unless she became a Christian, so she converted. Oh, and maybe there were some elitist Oxford Christian influences in the mix as well. She also seemed to embrace Christianity as more of a lifestyle choice (akin to being vegetarian), rather than a system of beliefs that have serious consequences.

Weber also included a brief conversation with a professor who was wary of Christianity because priests sexually abused him when he was a child, but, of course, she offers absolutely no reflection on this horrific moment. I suppose that accurately sums up Christianity—willful ignorance.

As an agnostic, I really wanted to like this book. I really wanted to understand how intelligent people can possibly believe such things; I wanted to also be surprised by Oxford, but if anything I feel more like an atheist now; more cemented in my non-belief.
Profile Image for Literary Redhead.
2,700 reviews693 followers
December 22, 2022
"So there it was, that stormy night I finally heard the gospel.... from a guy who looked like ... James Bond. That is the bizarre thing ... who knows how you will really hear it one day, but once you have heard it, I mean really heard it, you can never unhear it."

What a poignant and poetically written capture of Carolyn Weber's first year at the famous college at which Christian apologist C.S. Lewis studied and taught. Her title is a reworking of Lewis' own memoir, Surprised by Joy, and reveals Weber's conversion to Christianity, spurred especially by the man who would become her husband.

"To be one person one moment: lost. Then to be another person the next moment: found. This is the ultimate Valentine.... Surprised by Oxford, the birthday of my life came. Yes, my Love came to me."

As I read, I found myself reliving my own early days as a Christian, when a neighbor shared the Gospel during my parents' traumatic divorce. My soul soared with joy as I accepted Jesus as my Savior. I have never been the same since.

Thanks be to God for that gift, and thanks be to Carolyn Weber, who reveals the process and impact of her own moving conversion, including eventual forgiveness of her father, who came in and out of her family's life. He died a Christian after her husband shared the Good News with him.

Highly recommended for anyone who savors luminous memoirs penned with Holy Truth. A once-in-a-lifetime read! Also, a same-named screen version is out now. On my holiday wish list!
Profile Image for Douglas Bond.
Author 79 books227 followers
February 20, 2014
Surprised by Oxford, Carolyn Weber's memoir--O my goodness, I've been loving this read. Powerful and imaginatively crafted spiritual autobiography of a recent work of the Hound of Heaven in a devoutly devoted irreligious secularist feminist, hater of everything about God Bible, Jesus, faith and grace, graduate student in literature, surrounded by Christians (dead and alive ones) at Oxford.
Profile Image for Janae Byler.
108 reviews8 followers
January 26, 2025
Wow I think this is my favorite book so far this year. The excellent writing that weaves a beautiful narrative of slowly discovering Jesus, the Romantic literature passages sprinkled throughout, and the honest wrestling of an academic student faced with a decision that could change everything for her. It's all so captivating and inspiring, and just really connecting. Plus, the vivid descriptions of English countryside were an added bonus. If you love literature, academics, and Jesus, you will probably enjoy this book.
Profile Image for J.
83 reviews10 followers
November 30, 2021
A disclaimer to begin: I am an atheist with a very intense Christian background. I therefore read the book and its contents critically - which is not the same as reading it without an open mind. Many reviews rightly point out the virtues of the book, and I've tried acknowledging them too, but this is an ultimately negative review.

My expectation was to gain an insight into belief in god and good (not necessarily rational) reasons for that belief. I find a personal mode of narration better for gaining insight into a way of thinking and being in the world.

I enjoyed many parts of the book. It's highly readable, it offers some beautiful imagery, the writing was at times lovely (and always skillful), and the snippets of classic literature were fun and gave an excellent context to her chapters. The author's honesty and warmth are evident in her writing. Despite not agreeing with her conceptually, I could relate to her writing.

Criticising an ultimately unsatisfactory reading experience isn't as easy as it looks on Goodreads and Amazon. Let's start with technique. I did not like the impersonal / alien way of presenting her thoughts: They were stated in a way that seems unnatural for someone who is wrestling with difficult questions. For someone struggling with these issues, their biases or the inevitabilities shouldn't be so transparent or clear in their own mind. One usually isn't consciously aware of one's assumptions and it's not easy recognising, let alone letting go of, one's biases. The author's thoughts are skewed to make her objections seem less plausible; there is virtually no believable internal debate, the narration consists of an attempted stream-of-consciousness technique. The author has made straw men of her own thoughts (I must call her pre-Christian thoughts straw men, as she's far too intelligent to have NOT believed for the reasons she gave the reader).

The dialogue was far below the standard of the rest of the book - broken and pretentious in the best bits. Understandably she had a thematic structure in mind, so the dialogue would naturally progress towards an appropriate theme each time. This progression was, however, too unnatural. The book was too long, many things could have been compressed or left out - most of it was just her rebelling against a Christian doctrine or belief, and then she suddenly understands that even though she can't rebut the skeptical objection, that it doesn't matter because she's happy. It's honest, but very unsatisfactory, and ultimately places too high a premium on joy as an arbiter of truth and as an appropriate governing principle for one's belief system.

Most of the characters were one-dimensional, only she herself seemed like a real person. The rest were either bonkers, tiresomely pious or naive skeptics. The constant defence of some doctrines detracted heavily from what could have been a more personal and intimate read. That being said, there seems to be many token-like characters and contrived scenes present to normalize the Christian experience. The nights at the pub, the parties, the gay roommate that everyone is fine with and the apparent friendliness of all Christians. Honesty about one's worldview would be appreciated and is far more appropriate for a memoir - it would be miraculous (pun intended) that her life intersected with only wonderful Christians. A very lucky woman indeed if that's the case. If we're going to perpetuate stereotypes, the least the author could have done is contrived a secular character that is impressively good and virtuous, boggling her mind and acting as a kind of tension with the question of how important a biblical morality really is. The memoir is skewed so dramatically that it suggest that secular people always pale in comparison to the glories of god's people. The rose-coloured glasses, which she's wearing throughout the book: her inability to remember (or imagine) a time when she didn't think that the Christians were better than anyone else.
Her little jibe at the postmodernists WAS amusing (the dreaded Professor who doesn't like Milton). It's amazing how meaningless everything (except her religion, naturally) seems to her; how postmodern!

Summary. It's an ode to Christianity, written by a convert. She lays down every criticism she can think of on ways of life that are not hers: These are leveled based on her anecdotal experience, which I found intensely obscured by her new beliefs. That said, I do like her and was interested in what she had to say. I think perhaps her mistake lies in trying to write a memoir-apologetic. Kind of like the 'X great Christian found Atheism' type of books. She isn't a balanced, informative read, which would be great if she wasn't trying to be defensive and anticipate objections by the reader all the time - I want the story as it was, not how it IS to the writer now. Maybe that's asking for the impossible, but perhaps if some effort towards this was made obvious, then I wouldn't be so disappointed.
Profile Image for Savannah Knepp.
109 reviews6 followers
April 20, 2023
Theology, philosophy, literature, and funny hair dryer stories all woven together to tell the story of Caro's journey to finding Jesus. The timeline moves along seamlessly due to the winsome and relatable tone of the writing, perfectly chosen stories, and engaging dialogue. This is easily one of the most enjoyable and probing memoirs I've ever read.
Also, you know, Oxford.🤷‍♀️
Profile Image for Esta Doutrich.
151 reviews72 followers
April 29, 2023
Lovely. I’m sure it’s going to be an all time favorite. It took me a little bit to relax into the heady dialogue between her and her Oxford friends—at first it felt a little unbelievable. But I soon fell into the tone and voice of her writing and it ceased to bother me.
Profile Image for Sydney.
470 reviews161 followers
Want to read
October 22, 2023
I had this sitting in "currently reading" forever but never got past the prologue. I do still want to pick this up, but I am not in a non-fiction mood right now unfortunately. I'd like to read this soon though!!
Profile Image for Maya Joelle.
633 reviews104 followers
May 17, 2022
I'm in awe of Carolyn Weber's honest, gentle, and fearless writing. Surprised by Oxford is just my kind of story: set in the academic world, full of descriptions of old buildings and gardens, and wrestling with questions about God and His goodness. A collection of memories in roughly chronological order, broken up by passages of poetry and Bible verses, this book is beautiful and one I know I'll return to again and again.

I took off one star because of a couple theological quibbles (this book is not meant to be a work of theology, but I'll always be bothered by people saying that we must "choose" to follow Jesus and then get baptized as a symbol of this commitment...) and the epilogue, which felt rather sudden.

I would give my life for you to have this truth. To be amazed by His grace, healed by it, and have your life renewed in Him. To live and to die assured in this comfort and joy. Our tears wiped away and all set right. Forever.

Highly recommended.
Profile Image for Summer.
1,613 reviews14 followers
January 1, 2024
Just finished. I didn’t think I would finish before the years end, but I just couldn’t put it down. Really enjoyed the whole book and appreciated the honesty and her grappling with her friends and family trying to find her faith and Faith and the joy it brought. She had some really great friends at Oxford. TDH was excellent too. Really enjoyed his bit and looking forward to reading the next book. Loved all the literary references and the tour of Oxford. I’ll make notes for Lord willing a trip there soon.
Profile Image for Anna Joy Baxley.
51 reviews
November 28, 2022
This book has been a beautiful journey of following Caro as the Holy Spirit stirs the inner workings of her heart towards Himself. The Hound of Heaven as Lewis calls it. It’s wonderful. It stirs my affections for Him too.

“There is nothing naive about cultivating a pure heart.” (364)

“Often the darkest things within ourselves become the keys by which we open ourselves to God, to his healing and to a better comprehension of grace (full comprehensions, I think, is beyond us at present).” (372)

“Don’t forget to remember.” (299)
Profile Image for Corinne Holloway.
106 reviews4 followers
June 4, 2025
This is what I want all “Christian movies” to be like. While I haven’t read many autobiographical stories of conversion, this (I imagine) is one of the best of them. Why? Because the struggle is so honestly on display. Plus, the writing is so beautiful and the author so obviously loves words.

The quotes and poetry alone make this book worthwhile, but if you have ever wondered about life’s big questions or asked yourself if God really exists, this is a great book for you. It has it all: humor, beauty, philosophical questions, honesty, and even romance. Definitely worth your time.
Profile Image for Sarah Grace Hayward.
38 reviews2 followers
March 19, 2025
A woman’s journey to Christ but set in Oxford England? Not sure how you can beat that, such a delight to read (or listen to, in my case) :)
Profile Image for Sarah Morgan  Johnson.
32 reviews6 followers
January 8, 2022
Carolyn Weber will make you marvel at grace through fresh eyes, buy a volume of Romantic poetry, and google graduate programs in Oxford. The most marvelous first read of 2022!
Profile Image for Jamie.
Author 14 books17 followers
November 28, 2011
How do you criticize someone's personal faith journey? It's impossible. This book did not have the depth to serve as anything more to me than an interesting look at just that: an individual and personal faith journey. I was frustrated by the struggle between unbelieving and Christianity: should it not be unbelieving and simply believing? After all, all religions are right and all religions are wrong: "any idea of Him we have He must in His mercy shatter."

It would have been far more compelling if (as I'd hoped) Weber investigated many different faiths and found a spiritual home but instead she is awakened to Christianity by (surprise, surprise) a tall, dark, and handsome man, who (of course) she later marries. And if this man had been a tall, dark, and handsome Hindu? Muslim? We don't see the bigger faith journey of simply recognizing something bigger than yourself because the focus is always on Christianity as the saving Grace and not on the Grace itself.

But a nice story is still a nice story.

I wouldn't recommend this book, overall, but those who are searching will find comfort in it and those who love literature will delight in the references throughout.
Profile Image for Melody.
41 reviews
January 29, 2025
Delightful, witty, and easy to read. And heaps better than the movie.
Profile Image for Brett Wiley.
120 reviews14 followers
February 9, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed this. It’s a story about three things that I love: Jesus, England, and romance. What’s not to love? Seriously though, Carolyn’s story moved me like every story that I hear of Jesus interrupting someone’s like and wrecking all their plans. This really is a love story, but it’s a love story about a woman running from, wrestling with, and then finally falling in love with the God of all the universe. So it is the best kind of story.

It also helps that she is a great writer who paints really clear pictures with words. It could have been shorter I think, but I understand why she thought every conversation and moment mattered to telling her story.
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