What do you think?
Rate this book
Mission Earth #8
Disaster
Who is the true master of disaster? Earthlings: prepare for the shock of your lives! Global warming . . . reversed. The energy crisis . . . over. The greatest problem on Earth . . . solved. Saving the world is never easy, and for Heller, it turns out to be a tricky—and risky—business. He’ll have to blast a gang of space pirates in a lethal laser firefight. He’ll have to find a way to capture and control a black hole. He’ll have to undertake a perilous journey to Saturn and back and transport a titanic chunk of ice across the solar system. Then comes the hard part . . . because Heller is headed back to Voltar, where he’s about to uncover the identity of the powerful figure behind the conspiracy to end all conspiracies. He’s facing his deadliest nemesis yet, and before the intergalactic battle is over, the entire mission could end in DISASTER “Features rich inventiveness, brisk pacing and a large cast of appealing characters.” —Booklist
357 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1986
26 people are currently reading
484 people want to read
About the author
L. Ron Hubbard
1,927 books648 followersL. Ron Hubbard is universally acclaimed as the single most influential author and humanitarian of this modern age. His definitive works on the mind and spirit—comprising over 350 million copies in circulation and more than 40 international bestsellers—have resulted in a legacy benefiting millions and a movement spanning all cultures.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
January 16, 2020
It took a while, but there's finally a book in this series that's compelling. I found myself not wanting to stop reading and looking forward to picking up where I left off. It made my quest of reading this series less depressing. IMO, this is the best book of the series so far.
As we begin this book, Countess Krak (aka serial killer & dumb blonde) is in a prison cell (We're supposed to be stupid and think she's dead, but we read book 1). Jettero Heller (aka Super-duper-man) created spores to clean the air, is about to mass produce cars that don't need gas, and he's made a city in Florida energy independent with free electricity. Oh yeah, we're supposed to think he's dead too (but again, we read book 1). Teenie Whopper (aka habitual liar & jail-bait nymphomaniac) was shipped off to Voltar along with J. Walter Madison (aka Madman & PR nightmare). Utanc (aka undercover belly-dancer) still has Soltan Gris under her spell and we still don't know her true backstory, but we will in this book (it's a shocker).
Speaking of Gris, he's as stupid as ever. It really must be something in the Earth air because he was cunning and deadly in the beginning of the series when he was on Voltar. Simple solutions continue to evade his mind. With one strike, he could've taken out Izzy, Bang-Bang, Heller, and Krak by blowing up the Empire State Building, but no, he had to stage an elaborate kidnapping of Krak. He was going to kill her anyway and he killed everyone on her plane; I don't know why he didn't just blow the plane out of the sky. He could also solve all his financial woes by cashing in a few of those half-million Zorich Banking certificates (of which he had over 500).
Anyway, that's where we were when we started this book - in a series that seems to last too long. The book begins with Heller & Gris being stuck with each other again. It reminded me why I didn't like Heller in the early parts of the series. He's insubordinate and narcissistic. He has no respect for fellow officers, and Gris is his superior. I understand inter-service rivalries, but you don't insult other services to their face. We also discover more modifications Heller made to government equipment (i.e., Tug One). He thinks Tug One belongs to him (even though the Apparatus paid for it through official requisitions) and Heller has modified it to only respond to him. That alone should get him in trouble (it's a shame Gris knows nothing of the law). Later on, he actually commits fraud involving the theft of Tug One, but that's okay because he's Fleet and Fleet can do anything they want. Anyway, my hatred of Heller comes back two-fold in the beginning. He's a pompous ass who thinks the universe revolves around him. At the end of the book, his naivety gets him in trouble once again.
A little past the half-way point in the book, I found myself reading what I thought would be the end. This was reminiscent of Battlefield Earth where the middle of the book had a head-first collision into my preconceived idea of an appropriate end. With nearly two and a half books left in the series, I thought I was in for another L. Ron Hubbard twist. He may be verbose, but he's not that verbose. Part 67 appears to take a HUGE turn (a nearly 100 year turn).
What actually happened was that L. Ron Hubbard wrote himself into a corner. The series was the jail cell confession of Soltan Gris, but as soon as he was put in a jail cell, he would know nothing of the rest of the story. By Gris' own admission, he did not know what happened to Heller & Krak (and of course, Mister Calico), but readers want to know. So, Part 67 was a creative way of switching from the 1st person perspective of Soltan Gris to the 3rd person perspective of a writer/historian. It was a creative solution (and it's going into my data bank as a possible solution to this problem if I find myself in a similar quandary).
By the end of this book, all hell has broken out on Voltar and on Earth. All the plans of mice and men (aka everyone) have gone to hell in a hand-basket. One thing I really enjoyed was the reintroduction of Babe Corleone. She was gone from the story for far too long as far as I was concerned.
As we begin this book, Countess Krak (aka serial killer & dumb blonde) is in a prison cell (We're supposed to be stupid and think she's dead, but we read book 1). Jettero Heller (aka Super-duper-man) created spores to clean the air, is about to mass produce cars that don't need gas, and he's made a city in Florida energy independent with free electricity. Oh yeah, we're supposed to think he's dead too (but again, we read book 1). Teenie Whopper (aka habitual liar & jail-bait nymphomaniac) was shipped off to Voltar along with J. Walter Madison (aka Madman & PR nightmare). Utanc (aka undercover belly-dancer) still has Soltan Gris under her spell and we still don't know her true backstory, but we will in this book (it's a shocker).
Speaking of Gris, he's as stupid as ever. It really must be something in the Earth air because he was cunning and deadly in the beginning of the series when he was on Voltar. Simple solutions continue to evade his mind. With one strike, he could've taken out Izzy, Bang-Bang, Heller, and Krak by blowing up the Empire State Building, but no, he had to stage an elaborate kidnapping of Krak. He was going to kill her anyway and he killed everyone on her plane; I don't know why he didn't just blow the plane out of the sky. He could also solve all his financial woes by cashing in a few of those half-million Zorich Banking certificates (of which he had over 500).
Anyway, that's where we were when we started this book - in a series that seems to last too long. The book begins with Heller & Gris being stuck with each other again. It reminded me why I didn't like Heller in the early parts of the series. He's insubordinate and narcissistic. He has no respect for fellow officers, and Gris is his superior. I understand inter-service rivalries, but you don't insult other services to their face. We also discover more modifications Heller made to government equipment (i.e., Tug One). He thinks Tug One belongs to him (even though the Apparatus paid for it through official requisitions) and Heller has modified it to only respond to him. That alone should get him in trouble (it's a shame Gris knows nothing of the law). Later on, he actually commits fraud involving the theft of Tug One, but that's okay because he's Fleet and Fleet can do anything they want. Anyway, my hatred of Heller comes back two-fold in the beginning. He's a pompous ass who thinks the universe revolves around him. At the end of the book, his naivety gets him in trouble once again.
A little past the half-way point in the book, I found myself reading what I thought would be the end. This was reminiscent of Battlefield Earth where the middle of the book had a head-first collision into my preconceived idea of an appropriate end. With nearly two and a half books left in the series, I thought I was in for another L. Ron Hubbard twist. He may be verbose, but he's not that verbose. Part 67 appears to take a HUGE turn (a nearly 100 year turn).
What actually happened was that L. Ron Hubbard wrote himself into a corner. The series was the jail cell confession of Soltan Gris, but as soon as he was put in a jail cell, he would know nothing of the rest of the story. By Gris' own admission, he did not know what happened to Heller & Krak (and of course, Mister Calico), but readers want to know. So, Part 67 was a creative way of switching from the 1st person perspective of Soltan Gris to the 3rd person perspective of a writer/historian. It was a creative solution (and it's going into my data bank as a possible solution to this problem if I find myself in a similar quandary).
By the end of this book, all hell has broken out on Voltar and on Earth. All the plans of mice and men (aka everyone) have gone to hell in a hand-basket. One thing I really enjoyed was the reintroduction of Babe Corleone. She was gone from the story for far too long as far as I was concerned.
November 6, 2021
I can't give a full review of this peculiar book as it is number 8 in a dekalogy.
It is by the notorious L Ron Hubbard who—if you believe the huge amount of self-praise contained in the front and end matter is the greatest writer since Shakespeare.
The series appears to be about an invasion of Earth by a race of aliens who seem indistinguishable from homo sapiens. The book is in thirds: in the first, the story is related by the villain; in the centre, the story is related by an unsuccessful poet a hundred years later who, like the rest, of us, is trying to make sense of what happened; the final third switches to third-person
omniscient and continues the tale with the protagonist central.
Oh, and the protagonist has a super-intelligent cat.
Not much more to add.
It is by the notorious L Ron Hubbard who—if you believe the huge amount of self-praise contained in the front and end matter is the greatest writer since Shakespeare.
The series appears to be about an invasion of Earth by a race of aliens who seem indistinguishable from homo sapiens. The book is in thirds: in the first, the story is related by the villain; in the centre, the story is related by an unsuccessful poet a hundred years later who, like the rest, of us, is trying to make sense of what happened; the final third switches to third-person
omniscient and continues the tale with the protagonist central.
Oh, and the protagonist has a super-intelligent cat.
Not much more to add.
April 19, 2019
Really? You jump ahead 100 years for something like 40 pages and then jump back just to switch narrators 8 books in? Really? That’s all I can say for a review. This is the best this one gets.
July 7, 2008
BAD, BAD, BAD
October 16, 2020
I have read this series twice, once on Kindle and once on paperback. It is so fun, so fast-paced, and written in a very digestible style, that you can blast through the roller-coaster ride and adventure. A perfect way to start reading sci-fi or get back into sci-fi.
The entire series is a satire on current planetary conditions on Earth including environmental climate changes, political intrigue and control, CIA, international drug production, destruction of individuals by the media/press, and so on. To make it even more entertaining, the author has written the first 8 books from the viewpoint of the antagonist, Officer Soltan Gris, a depraved, murderous Voltarian CIA agent (Coordinated Information Apparatus – yes a dig on the US CIA) who cannot comprehend why people who do good even exist – they should all be destroyed. This offers as an additional bonus an incredible insight into the true, and very real, criminal mind.
As I have said before to friends, if you have ever been attacked or have been targeted by colleagues or people because you were doing well in life, and winning and succeeding – and couldn’t understand why that was happening to you -, I suggest you read this series
The entire series is a satire on current planetary conditions on Earth including environmental climate changes, political intrigue and control, CIA, international drug production, destruction of individuals by the media/press, and so on. To make it even more entertaining, the author has written the first 8 books from the viewpoint of the antagonist, Officer Soltan Gris, a depraved, murderous Voltarian CIA agent (Coordinated Information Apparatus – yes a dig on the US CIA) who cannot comprehend why people who do good even exist – they should all be destroyed. This offers as an additional bonus an incredible insight into the true, and very real, criminal mind.
As I have said before to friends, if you have ever been attacked or have been targeted by colleagues or people because you were doing well in life, and winning and succeeding – and couldn’t understand why that was happening to you -, I suggest you read this series
March 24, 2019
This was a fantastic series. Wow! I read it 4 times now. Just amazing. It has everything. Aliens, the CIA, FBO, Rockefeller, the Illuminati, Mafia, Nazis, KGB, finances, the stock market, Wal street, PR, press, fake news, media, Homosexuality, sex, politics, intergalactic warfare -- earth in its fullest picture. YOU NAME IT. It is there!
The hero is awesome, and his girl is a bombshell (but you better do not mess with her).
It is all there - everything you would ever want from such an Epic! A 1.1 million words series -- 996 characters in 10 volumes! Wow! Fantastic! I lost a lot of sleep! It is that good!
The hero is awesome, and his girl is a bombshell (but you better do not mess with her).
It is all there - everything you would ever want from such an Epic! A 1.1 million words series -- 996 characters in 10 volumes! Wow! Fantastic! I lost a lot of sleep! It is that good!
May 21, 2025
i started reading this for shits n gigs after finally finding an l ron hubbard book at an op shop, and did not (but am now entirely unsurprised about) expect violent transmisogyny a third of the way in.
it wasn't that good so i stopped there and figured lrn's ghost doesn't deserve the dignity of me completing his shitty self-insert scifi book. if you imagine brent from the good place's book and michael scott's michael scarn screenplay combined, that's how lrn writes protagonist and ultimate wanker jettero heller. save yourself the trouble.
it wasn't that good so i stopped there and figured lrn's ghost doesn't deserve the dignity of me completing his shitty self-insert scifi book. if you imagine brent from the good place's book and michael scott's michael scarn screenplay combined, that's how lrn writes protagonist and ultimate wanker jettero heller. save yourself the trouble.
November 12, 2020
Great that the lovely heroes (Jet, Krak, Hightee, etc.) manage to survive so long, and good also that the bunch of stupid and wierd villains (Gris, Madison, Teenie, etc.) do not die eitheir so they can keep plotting against the others and make us sweat and gasp and be scared while we read!
That's what makes a good thrilling story.
That's what a good writer is about.
That's what makes a good thrilling story.
That's what a good writer is about.
October 29, 2020
This volume is one of my favorites. Lots of action as Jet's plans to save Earth from itself come to fruition and he turns his sights towards Earth's (and the empire's) enemies on Voltar. Lurking in the wings are Teenie Wopper and J. Walter Madison who are also on a ship to Voltar.
November 28, 2017
Fascinating series but it gets a bit weird and pervy. I read the entire series twice.
August 28, 2022
Series was fun to read. Nothing all that serious, but fun nonetheless.
Want to read
March 22, 2017i want to know a summarise of the story
July 31, 2014
The title of this book says it all
3 April 2012
I do remember reading this book namely because of the comment that Hubbard changes narrator half way through. Apparently it was because Soltan Gris was no longer in a position to be able to see all that was going on, and I suspect that it was because he met a very bad and nasty end. The person that takes over the role of narrator happens to be the marketing executive that managed to get off of Earth and into the Confederacy and in doing so began to spread his poison across the galaxy.
I guess the title of this book is reflective of the apparent disaster that would happen if a marketing executive were to sneak into a world where marketing does not exist. I wondered for a bit whether it was possible for a intergalatic society to be able to exist without a concept of marketing, but I suspect that it can. While on Earth the modern capitalistic society is able to survive and flourish with marketing (depending of course on who you speak to) there are other technocratic societies that seem to be able to exist without such a concept (not that I can think of any). However the difference does tend to involve the standard of living. Countries that do not have marketing tend not to have a high standard of living amongst their population.
However it is the nature of the modern world that pretty much most countries cannot prevent marketers from penetrating them. Take for instance China: it has gone from a communist state to a capitalist state (even though most corporate bosses are also card carrying communists). However, despite this, if a country does resist the encroach of the marketers, the marketters tend to return with guns, as we saw with Iraq and Afghanistan. In many cases, American Imperialism has been seen as a quest to open up new markets. Yet much of this has not seemed to be very overt. There is still much of Africa that has been closed off, though this is usually because the government is unstable and much of the population are poverty stricken. As such the penetration is not so much to open up new markets, but rather to look for resources so that the populations of the developed countries can continue to have their disposable luxuries.
So, this is definitely going to be the last of the Mission Earth books that I will write about, simply because I did not read any more of them. I am not sure why I stopped reading them. Maybe it was because I moved to Sydney, or that I picked up friends that helped push my reading habit off to one side.
3 April 2012
I do remember reading this book namely because of the comment that Hubbard changes narrator half way through. Apparently it was because Soltan Gris was no longer in a position to be able to see all that was going on, and I suspect that it was because he met a very bad and nasty end. The person that takes over the role of narrator happens to be the marketing executive that managed to get off of Earth and into the Confederacy and in doing so began to spread his poison across the galaxy.
I guess the title of this book is reflective of the apparent disaster that would happen if a marketing executive were to sneak into a world where marketing does not exist. I wondered for a bit whether it was possible for a intergalatic society to be able to exist without a concept of marketing, but I suspect that it can. While on Earth the modern capitalistic society is able to survive and flourish with marketing (depending of course on who you speak to) there are other technocratic societies that seem to be able to exist without such a concept (not that I can think of any). However the difference does tend to involve the standard of living. Countries that do not have marketing tend not to have a high standard of living amongst their population.
However it is the nature of the modern world that pretty much most countries cannot prevent marketers from penetrating them. Take for instance China: it has gone from a communist state to a capitalist state (even though most corporate bosses are also card carrying communists). However, despite this, if a country does resist the encroach of the marketers, the marketters tend to return with guns, as we saw with Iraq and Afghanistan. In many cases, American Imperialism has been seen as a quest to open up new markets. Yet much of this has not seemed to be very overt. There is still much of Africa that has been closed off, though this is usually because the government is unstable and much of the population are poverty stricken. As such the penetration is not so much to open up new markets, but rather to look for resources so that the populations of the developed countries can continue to have their disposable luxuries.
So, this is definitely going to be the last of the Mission Earth books that I will write about, simply because I did not read any more of them. I am not sure why I stopped reading them. Maybe it was because I moved to Sydney, or that I picked up friends that helped push my reading habit off to one side.
May 4, 2015
The Mission Earth series is a big, bloated, fun and funny dekalogy* of pulp and satire and non-stop action. It's not a serious work, nor was it intended to be; I believe Hubbard wrote it simply out of fondness for the field, the way it was when he was beginning his career. He surely didn't need the money. It lampoons everything from economics to law enforcement to crime to space opera to science and all stops in between. It's not a particularly well-written work of literature, but is engaging and interesting and, despite the length, fairly fast-paced throughout. It was de rigueur in the publications of the field when it first appeared to vilify it entirely, I suspect both because of who Hubbard was and the old-fashioned themes and tropes of the work... not to mention the ubiquitous advertising campaign that surrounded the publication with the ever-present asterisk definition that I just couldn't resist reproducing here. However, I decided to see what all the fuss had been about and gave it a shot, thought it was fun, and read the whole thing straight through one summer. It was fun; I liked it.
*A series of ten books.
*A series of ten books.
October 17, 2020
Our savior comes from Voltar
Split in ten volumes for editorial (and practical) reasons, the Mission Earth series can be seen as a continuous narrative whose chapters are identified by the different books. This “space operatish” saga (not a lot of space travels, but alien technological gizmos are everywhere!) will follow the comically clumsy actions of corrupted Voltarian agent Soltan Gris as he narrates his attempts to sabotage and destroy the brave Jettero Heller, another native from planet Voltar, bent on “cleaning” the polluted planet Earth to meet voltarian colonial standards. The extremely grotesque way used to paint earthlings' corruption and other... “faults”, however, becomes rapidly a double-edged weapon for reader’s appreciation and may cause some annoyance if the comments read are not thought coming from the corrupted alien venting in his journal, but from the author himself trying to slip his personal (Scientology's) propaganda into the narrative. The suggestion here is to forget the author and have a long light-hearted read, laughing at alien stupidity and their lack in understanding human complexity!
Split in ten volumes for editorial (and practical) reasons, the Mission Earth series can be seen as a continuous narrative whose chapters are identified by the different books. This “space operatish” saga (not a lot of space travels, but alien technological gizmos are everywhere!) will follow the comically clumsy actions of corrupted Voltarian agent Soltan Gris as he narrates his attempts to sabotage and destroy the brave Jettero Heller, another native from planet Voltar, bent on “cleaning” the polluted planet Earth to meet voltarian colonial standards. The extremely grotesque way used to paint earthlings' corruption and other... “faults”, however, becomes rapidly a double-edged weapon for reader’s appreciation and may cause some annoyance if the comments read are not thought coming from the corrupted alien venting in his journal, but from the author himself trying to slip his personal (Scientology's) propaganda into the narrative. The suggestion here is to forget the author and have a long light-hearted read, laughing at alien stupidity and their lack in understanding human complexity!
February 10, 2016
While not as totally horrible as the Battlefield Earth book these aren't that great. There are some good plots themes and a sorta pulpish feel to the characters, but overall it seems to fall short of what it could be. The story seems to ramble and could have been cut by 1/3 and still got the point across. The random sex and sadistic events just seem to be placed in there not for storyline but for shock value. Not recommended
February 21, 2015
Take all ten of these books and boil 'em down all night... no, leave it on the burner for a whole week. Reduce it too a thick dense sticky sauce. And still, this will have very little flavour.
There was the seed of a decent parody in there within the first two books then the joke was over. The joke became, "...let's make it ten books, just so we could call it a "dekalogy".
There was the seed of a decent parody in there within the first two books then the joke was over. The joke became, "...let's make it ten books, just so we could call it a "dekalogy".
Read
January 17, 2016Mission Earth
April 21, 2009
Was better than the previous seven, but still not great.
July 19, 2009
Great Series of Science Fiction novels.
September 30, 2013
hilarious! witty satire!
March 23, 2016
Didn't like it.
June 6, 2012
Scifi
August 26, 2017
Wild and crazy story. Decent read. =)
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews