One Real Thing

by Anah Crow, Dianne Fox

Nick Addison has taken care of Hollister Welles since college. Though the responsible grad student and the uninhibited partier were total opposites, they had always shared an inexplicable bond. Nick knows he should stop saving the out-of-control Holly, but when Holly hits rock-bottom hard—and publicly—he can't resist coming to his rescue one last time. Can't resist the feeling of having Holly need him again.

Bringing Holly back to New York City, Nick gives Holly the chance to face his demons and break his dangerous habits—while keeping Holly's presence a secret from Nick's wife. He doesn't want to face Caroline's hatred of Holly...or the reasons she might have to resent him.

Then the tables are turned. Just as Holly pulls himself together, Nick's life falls apart. Now it's up to Holly to bring Nick back from the brink—and to make Nick finally face the desires he's long denied.

Genres: M M Romance, BDSM, Contemporary, Friends To Lovers, Romance, Gay For You, Erotica

180 pages, Kindle Edition

First published December 15, 2010

About the author

Under Construction!

F.A.Q.

Do you want to participate in Generic_Author_Event?

Drop me a line, please! If you're looking for a book for donation or a blog post from me, I'm usually cool with that.

Are you going to write a sequel to Some_Book_You_Wrote?

The up front answer is no, unless the book cover indicates that it's part of a series. If there's going to be a sequel to a book, you'll know once I've signed the contract.

Who is this Dianne person?

Only the light of my life and all that rot. She e-sides here: http://www.foxwrites.com/ Without her, you wouldn't see much from me at all, not even the books that don't have her name on the cover.

Do you read your email?

All the time. I think the question you want is do I answer my email? Occasionally. Badly. I'm a terrible, terrible emailer.

You're reading X books at once?!

Only occasionally at once. I can read two books at the same time, but I get dizzy. Mostly, I just switch books depending on my mood. It's unusual for me to have less than four on the go at a time.

Do you read reviews of your books?

No, sorry! I'm here, yes, but I prefer not to read reviews (no matter how lovely they are) because once a book has left my hands and is available to the readers, my relationship to it changes. It's all grown up. :) I have a clutter of booklings to nurture so they will join the others on your shelves.

Will you read/review my book?

Sorry, but no. There are a number of reasons for this but the biggest is—I suck at doing these things. I'm a horrible procrastinator. I get wound up and then blank out what I'm supposed to do. My ADHD goes galumphing through my head like a bull in a china shop, wrecking everything.

I'm a writer and you hated/loved my book!

I'm sure you're a lovely person, either way. Please have one or both of: "I'm sorry!" or "You're welcome!"

Can I be excused now?

Of course you can! Thanks for reading.

Reviews

[Optimist ♰King's Wench♰ · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one started off shaky for me. I was shit skerd there for a sec that this would be my first bad experience with these authors. Thankfully they pulled it out of the nosedive towards the middle.

Holly's last relationship crashed and burned and he's spun out. In public. Drinking, drugging, fucking randoms. It makes the celebrity trash news and Nick, Holly's college friend, can take it no longer. He hops on flight from NY to LA to collect his friend before he wends up 6' under.

Holly's kind of fussy about being treated as such but it really doesn't last long. I started to get skeeved because their relationship seems very codependent to me. Nick installs Holly in a loft apartment, gets him in with a psychiatrist, gives him rules to live by and even at one point makes him carry a GPS tracker.

Holly backslides once but really the whole getting clean and staying clean was exceedingly easy. Too easy imo.

But then Nick's wife drops the infidelity bomb, which sends Nick into a tailspin and Holly comes to his rescue. I felt like this turn of events balanced out their relationship by showing that they both need each other. Just in different ways.



I'm not crazy about the way Nick's wife was portrayed but I think it fitting for the narrative as a whole and contributed to Nick's characterization.

Their relationship development is firmly in the slowest of slow burns. What I liked best was how much they've wanted each other for years but never acted on it because they thought the other person wasn't interested in them that way. I also like how the vast majority of their friends knew and thought they were idiots.

Once the fire ignites, though, it was powerful stuff. Crow and Fox do unfussy kink really well and I couldn't help but be affected by the way their power exchange organically developed.

Holly wants to serve Nick; he has only ever responded this way to Nick. But he wants nothing more than to be at Nick's feet, cooking for him, making his life easier and Nick responds in kind with structure and dominance. The begging and the feeding scenes were my favorites. Shocker. And the ring. I really liked that little detail and its significance to both of them.



The secondary characters I really enjoyed especially Danner. Danner is a mess and truly does need a keeper but he amused me.

Max Tatch did a great job narrating; he gave himself to the emotions on the page and brought them to life time and time again. He also varied the voices of all the characters and really brought his 'A' game on the sex scenes. I'll be listening to him again.

Recommend to slow burn, D/s, friends to lovers and hurt/comfort fans.

[Bookwatcher · Rating 5 out of 5]

...is never easy to fall in love, and this book is all about that... the wrong and the right choices of two men, trying to discover what is love.

Nick is a successful journalist, with a beautiful wife, and a pretty house full of art objects....... or he is a frustrated writer working as journalist, with a shallow beautiful wife, in a pretty house full of meaningless art objects?

Holly is a drug addicted, the poster boy of happiness and a stud sleeping with men or women changing partners constantly....... Or he is drug addicted because of a not well diagnosed mental disorder, a poster boy of happiness in public to disguise his depression and a stud sleeping with men or women changing partners constantly to avoid the only person he truly love and can't have?

Amazing writing, heartbreaking love story of two best friends trying to understand what is love, and why sometimes the truth is not what our eyes are seeing, but what our heart are feeling.

5 stars, and I certainly recommend this book

[Annery · Rating 5 out of 5]

****Re-read/listen 11/15/21-11/15/21***Max Tatch

I’ve been in something of a romance slump lately so I decided to go to one of my tried & true pick-me ups. It’d be disingenuous of me to say that this is only my second go around with this book. Reader, it is not. I love this book, I’m not too sure as to why, and that makes me love it more.

Surely one of the reasons is Max Tatch’s pitch perfect narration. Sublime. It fits the characters like a handmade glove. The rest is that the story squares with how I feel an actual D/s relationship could develop and work. Everything between Nick & Holly flows organically from who they are to what they need without a textbook of rules, should & shouldn't, outfits, poses etc. All the things that, while enjoying BDSM centered stories, make me always keep them a bit removed, in the realm of fiction 🤷🏻‍♀️

Anywho …. I loved it again ❤️❤️❤️

***first read 1/17/17-1/19/17***

This book is a fevered dream of an obsessive almost all consuming love. And I loved it.

Probably the best way to enjoy this book is to inhale it in one go so as to be swept up in the deep and almost visceral need Holly has for Nick and his attentions and how Nick finally wakes up to the fact that he cares for Holly much more than just as a friend. Overall I'd highly recommend experiencing the book in the fantastic narration of Max Tatch. You'll be enveloped in the all encompassing emotions between Nick and Holly.

Nick and Holly have known each other since college and ever since Holly has been trying every antic in the book to attract Nick's attention. This worked until adult life started and they drifted apart. For Holly this has led to a path of self destruction and when he's at his lowest Nick comes and rescues him. To put Holly back together Nick comes up with a set of rules for Holly to follow. It works and that is the beginning of their particular brand of D/s, one that at first has nothing to do with sex but with surrender from Holly with the knowledge that Nick will hold him together when he screws up or falls apart.

The journey for Holly and Nick to get together isn't immediate and I like that Anah Crow, Dianne Fox allow time for Holly to heal and become better as he's struggling not just with what he thinks are unrequited feelings for Nick but also a painful family history and all the damage he's inflicted on himself. Later when Nick's carefully constructed life collapses Holly is able to be there for him and it feels right and natural. The fact that he chooses or needs to be submissive to Nick doesn't make him a helpless or weak person. Their relationship is an expression of love that is fulfilling for their emotional needs. They are each other's "real thing".

There is no sex until perhaps the last third of the book but it's very satisfying when it does happen. However that's not what this book is about. And I didn't miss it. It's about emotional intimacy and being as entwined as two people can be and still remain two people. And though there is a D/s element to the relationship it has nothing to do with perhaps traditional BDSM ideas. It's better. It feels true. Real.

I'd recommend it. Yes.

[Bubbles Hunty Honest & Direct Opinions · Rating 5 out of 5]

The characters are so well written and developed I fell in love with them right away. The writing was great and never annoyed me once.

The story is pretty simple but with the great characters and smooth writing i was drawn in right away. Nick is married for the first half of the book, he never cheats on her though and there is no sex until about 70% into the story. I like that the book focused on the story and characters and not sex. I disliked Nick's wife from the first time she spoke to him in the story, and each interaction they had after made me dislike her more I don't think she said one nice thing to Nick the entire book.

[Gigi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I finally had a chance to read this one, considered a classic by so many GoodRead friends. I did love it, lots and lots! It was not what I was expecting, but I was pleasantly surprised with the splash of D/s when the two MCs started their sexual relationship. Wow, super hot stuff!

If you like hurt/healing/comfort and friends-to-lovers, this one will be RIGHT up your ally! Have fun!

[SheReadsALot · Rating 5 out of 5]

I. LOVE. THIS. STORY.

It had the right amount of everything to keep the reader hooked.

Hollister a.k.a Holly is a drugged out, boozed up, crazy pile of damage. He's the bad boy that tries to out bad boy himself. But his college friend, Nick, comes to save him from himself one more time. Nick's always had a crush on Holly even back when they were in college ten years ago but he's married now...to a woman. And a successful, straight & narrow, journalist. The perfect example. Or is he?

There's too much I could say as to why this book is awesome. It's real. It's sexy. It's angsty good. Both men let their true selves out and...I loved who they were under their shells.

There's more controlling factors than heavy BDSM in this one but it's fitting. (The kissing the feet thing? Loved it!)

This was an easy 5 STAR read.

Alright!

[Justacat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hard to rate this one. Like a few other reviewers, I have to mark down - significantly in my case - for the fact that this book drastically changed tone, and quality, at about the 65-70% point. If it had ended there I'd have given it a 4.5. for good writing, well developed and engaging characters (at least most of them - the wife is a bit of a bad-guy caricature), a great set-up with a lot of conflict, and an unusual and compelling relationship. Nick's rescue, Holly's slow and difficult recovery - all this was unusually well done, engrossing and captivating.

But the remainder of the book gets a much, much lower rating, more in the 2.5 range. After the initial "coming together" the conflict is entirely resolved (though it need not have been, especially since Nick had, apparently, never been with a man until that point), and the story loses all momentum and oomph and becomes basically nothing more than a series of sex scenes - with a slight bdsm element that is never fully developed, seems to come out of nowhere, feels baffling and "unnatural" (in the context of the book), and is entirely superfluous. The immediate mutual gushing adoration between Nick and Holly - e.g., every single conversation peppered with "I love you," long declarations to each other about their feelings, the fact that the two can't be parted for even a day - feels over the top and excessive and, more important, feels inconsistent with the characterizations the authors developed so carefully in the first part of the book. In fact, to a large extent much of what had earlier made the characters so compelling disappears.

The inconsistency, abrupt change in the tone and pacing of the story and the characters' behavior, and the overall lackluster nature of the final third ruined for me what had been an unusually enjoyable read up to that point; I slogged through, but I had a difficult time finishing.

[Nikyta · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an incredible story. From beginning to end, I couldn't put it down. The characters felt so real, I couldn't help but feel sympathy for Holly or anger towards Caroline or just about every other emotion while I was reading this.

While the plot is simple, it's still interesting watching the characters grow. The story takes us from Nick finding out Holly is in danger of killing himself, through drugs and alcohol, to saving Holly. In turn, when Holly finally gets his feet back under himself, things turn upside down for Nick by a cheating wife, Holly comes to the rescue and the relationship Holly and Nick have becomes more intimate and more satisfying than any other relationships they've had in the past.

In the beginning of the book, Holly was in all kinds of hell. He was going through withdrawals and trying to fight his instant reaction to get close to Nick. He was sad and angry and just wanted to be loved and told he's not a failure. Within the first impression of Holly, I instantly liked him. Yeah, he was an alcoholic/drunk addict with a sex addiction but that drew me in because of the way he reacted to Nick when Nick flew across country to save him. I loved how we saw Holly at his worst and then watched him change and reform into the man that eventually helps Nick out of his crisis. I loved Holly for the simple reason of him just wanting to please Nick.

Nick, on the other hand, has the perfect life. He's a successful journalist with a perfect wife but he has one flaw: he can't just leave Holly in the wind. He thrives on Holly needing him but not just that, he needs Holly to need him. I wasn't quit sure what to think of Nick at first. He seemed like an overly demanding guy but it becomes clear that he's just afraid something bad would happen to Holly. And, while his life slowly started to revolve around Holly is when I started falling in love with Nick, too. The simple pleasures he got from just looking at Holly, speaking to Holly or hearing from Holly made me like Nick for reasons I don't even know why. Lol

This was definitely a sweet story between long lost friends and just the writing alone will draw you in. The fact that the story revolved around the characters and their lives and not sex allowed me to enjoy and appreciate it more. The secondary characters brought a lightness to the story because they somehow mellowed out the severeness of Nick and Holly's situation, if that makes any sense. They also gave us an even greater incite into Holly and Nick's personalities.

I'd absolutely recommend this book to everyone who's looking for something with a simple plot and loving characters. Fair warning, though. While this isn't a bdsm book, the relationship between Holly and Nick eventually turns into one of submissive and dominate. In which it pleases Holly to do what Nick says and, at times, ask Nick permission to do simple things such as drink coffee or go to work. While it may seem a bit weird in the beginning, I thought it suited their relationship quite well.

This definitely is one of my favorite books and, without question, going to be read many times from me in the future. [image error]

[Valentina Heart · Rating 5 out of 5]

You can rarely come across two characters who deserve to end up together more than these two. It's almost a hurting desire you have for them, because it is so obvious how much they love each other and how much they care.

While the first part of the book is centered on their messed up lives and the distance they'd created between them, it is still interesting to read about the process which led them from being strangers to friends again. The transition was so easy and yet is was anything but. Just when you think their new life story might begin, you are thrust into new difficulties and the role reversal is simply beautiful.

It takes a while before you get to see them together as they are supposed to be, but even that holds a few surprises and the beautiful way Holly loves just blew me away.

There are a few sad and difficult parts in this book but I wouldn't call it angsty. Unlike other books it's the simple introduction to realistic problems and the way the characters deal with them. I loved the fact that there were no misunderstandings and unnecessary complications. But still, their journey was anything other than simple.

I think this one is worth the time and I recommend it.

[CrabbyPatty · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ooh, I really liked this book and can't believe it took me this long to discover it. Beautifully written - I love the second chance theme and the way Nick and Holly longed for one another for years. First Nick saves Holly and then Holly saves Nick right back ... oh, wait. After I read that line again, I realized that was a quote from Pretty Woman - gag.

Visit my blog, Sinfully Good Gay Book Reviews

[Aeren · Rating 1 out of 5]

Mi récord: lo dejo en el 2% gracias a esta perla: That woman had no right to punish Holly that way, no right to punish him at all if she couldn't manage to keep him under control.
No tengo idea si Holly es solo un imbécil o un tigre que se ha escapado del zoo, pero tampoco me quedo a enterarme.

[Ami · Rating 4 out of 5]

One Real Thing is a story about friendship and love that stands the test of time.

Nick Addison has always been there for Hollister 'Holly' Welles, since they first met in college. Nick's role in Holly's life is more as his caretaker -- even if they live separately, Nick keeps track on what is going with Holly. So when Holly's life is out of control to the lowest form, Nick marches into his place, brings Holly back to New York with him, and nurtures Holly back to function.

What I like: Holly's character, at least in the beginning before he and Nick finally together. I always have soft-heart for the troubled/damaged ... and that is what Holly is depicted. At the same time, he is strong enough to finally pull himself together, to prove to Nick that he will not the other man down. There is a self-struggle there and it's always been good to read someone wins over his demons. I also adore his almost innocent-submission when he is with Nick. The characterization is well-written and I appreciate that the love-making comes later in the story, to gives chance for Holly to get back on his feet first.

What I don't like: the portrayal of Nick's bitch of a wife is over the top. I know there are women like that, but as a woman, I'm also a bit annoyed when one is portrayed as the reason of a man's self-suffering. No, I'm not being a feminist, but there's a reason why I prefer to have more male-male focused story in an M/M romance without having to add a female bitch to the equation (I already have that reading that problem in real life or in m/f story). I am also not very sure with the slightly codependent nature of Holly/Nick's relationship. I'm not very sure that they're both are finally equal in the end. While I don't mind a D/s nature to their love, but Holly's kissing Nick's feet in more than one ocassion is not really my thing too.

Despite of what I don't like, this story is one of the "better" (and memorable) in my collection ...

[Janna · Rating 1 out of 5]

Wow, this book was terrible. The characterization is virtually nonexistent. Both of the main characters are entirely defined by the father-teenage son dynamic of their relationship. The pacing is not good. Not much happens, and most of the book is taken up by continuous rehashing of their disturbing, co-dependent relationship. Nick is really boring and unlikable, and he has a wife whom he isn't attracted to at all. His wife is the most interesting character in the book until halfway through when she is conveniently and suddenly revealed to be an adulterous bitch so Nick can divorce her and get with Holly. Also, in spite of the "BDSM" tag that some readers have assigned to this book, there is nothing kinky about the sex. There's a severe power imbalance in the nonsexual part of the relationship, some vague foot fetishism, and otherwise completely vanilla sex written in the formulaic way that female writers tend to write gay sex. I honestly don't know why so many people like this book except that slash fans tend to have pretty low standards. I regret spending money and time on it.

[Fiona Goodman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I actually read this on my Nook.

[Nick Addison has taken care of Hollister Welles since college. Though the responsible grad student and the uninhibited partier were total opposites, they had always shared an inexplicable bond. Nick knows he should stop saving the out-of-control Holly, but when Holly hits rock-bottom hard—and publicly—he can't resist coming to his rescue one last time. Can't resist the feeling of having Holly need him again.]

4 1/2 stars

I really enjoyed this book. It is not your average male on male sex book, but a real love story filled with unfullfilled longing on the part of the two men.

Hollister (Holly) Welles has adored Nick since college, but always felt that he was not good enough for his "perfect' put together friend. He also thinks that Nick will never love him because Nick is straight and Holly fears that revealing the truth will push him away.

Nick meets his future wife in college who detests Holly. This drives a wedge between the two men who go their own way.

The character of Holly is by far the most interesting. He is a damaged child/man who sees his only value is as a partying man whore who no one takes seriously. He goes from lover to lover (both male and female) and is bent on self-destruction due to his feelings of being lost and important to no one other than his mentally ill mother whom he took care of as a child, but who is now hospitalized and goes through periods of not knowing who he is. Holly feels as if this is the only person who has ever cared about him and that he is completely alone.

Nick is also dissatisfied with his life and keeps track of Holly behind his wife's back through tabloids on the internet which are sent to him by a mutual friend of the two men. Nick has always longed for Holly, but feels that he has to play by society's rules (wife,kids,career,etc...) mostly as a way to fullfill what he fills would be his deceased parent's wish for him. Thus he remains in a cold, loveless relationship despite his longing for his lost friend.

When Nick (through the tabloids) sees Holly spinning out of control he decides to take action. He flies to L.A. to save his friend who is clearly either on his way to death by suicide or overdose. Nick feels that Holly is the only one who has ever really made him feel important and that he can save, even though he is not in a position to save himself from a dying marriage.

The relationship between Nick and Holly is definitely co-dependent, but it's really not that simple. Both men have definite feelings of low self-worth and this is what keeps them apart from the beginning. While in college, Nick felt that he was too serious and uptight for the fun loving Holly who only flirted with him like he did everyone else and feared rejection if he were to let his feeling for Holly be known. This along with Holly's fear of rejection by the 'perfect' pulled together Nick is the thread that keeps running through the book until they come to the point where there feelings are eventually confronted.

The theme of rescuing is dominant throughout the book. While on the surface it seems that Holly cannot survive without someone taking care of him, Nick's 'rescue' is actually just the catalyst for Holly's eventual growing into a stronger more fullfilled person. He begins to confront the demons from his past and begins to see that there are more people who care for him than he thought. Holly needs to become stronger for himself before he can truly be in a relationship with anyone else.

Nick's life, on the other hand, begins to fall apart. He is forced to question his life decisions and realizes that the one who really needs rescuing is himself. It is only when everything he has built his life around begins to unravel that he has to question how he has lived his life based on what he is 'supposed' to be rather than who he really is.

Ultimately though it is the sheer devotion of feeling these two men have for each other which is at the heart of the book. Reading this book, you really feel the longing and desire that has lasted years between them but had never been realized. There is a dominant/submissive element to the book but it feels that it is not about sex, but rather an expression of innate tendancies within both men's personality that can only truly be recoqnized and fullfilled by each other. It really does seem that they are 2 halves of the same whole. This dynamic has been there from the beggining and seems as if this is what probably drew them together in the first place.

While there is steamy sexual tension in this book, untimately this is a passionate love story, a good one.

[Alyosha · Rating 3 out of 5]

The One Real Thing was one of the best friends become lovers stories I have read this year.

On the first half both main characters fall apart one after the other, and get saved/healed by the other. Nick and Holly's love for one another was palpable and captivating. Both men were unique and interesting characters to read about. The writing was solid throughout the book, but some parts were delivered better than others. The high point of the story is when Nick and Holly finally confess their long hidden love for each other and show new, exciting sides of themselves. Their relationship was maybe slightly co-dependent and obsessive, but very enjoyable and enthralling to read about. The story drags the tiniest bit near the end, but it was nice to get a look on how their everyday life would be.


Overall very good (the dynamic between the main characters was extremely hot and well explored, ORT is definitely already worth the read for that alone *g*, luckily it was very appealing otherwise, too).

[Vivian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reading this book is like watching one of those reels where a skier goes plummeting down the slope head over heels and finally comes to a sliding stop--you're waiting to see if they get up or if that was it.

Holly is sweet, but uncontrollable...except for one person.

Nick is strong with never the appearance of a loose end until he's not and then there's only one person who can bring him back.

Lovely, tormenting and heartfelt story with D/s and two characters who understand the word cherish.

Favorite quote:
“Maybe that’s why she hated you so much, because you were the one real thing in my life.”

[Steph ☀️ · Rating 1 out of 5]

Sooooo....

It might be me but this book was stale. Honestly, the only somewhat interesting thing that kept my attention came around the 50% mark. Other than that it was a skim fest. I swear things were just thrown together for the sake of words lol.

[Lily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ten years after college Hollister "Holly" Welles is a total disaster, drugs and alcohol pretty much ruining his life, while his friend Nick Addison leads a successful life with all the trappings, including a wife. When Nick can no longer ignore Holly's downward spiral he goes after him determined to save him. Just as Holly is turning his life around though it's Nick's life that goes down the tubes.

I loved how Holly was able to step up and be there for Nick when he needed it. As Nick starts to come out of his funk he's finally ready to admit to himself the mistakes he made trying to live up to the expectations of other people and now he's ready to live life on his terms, and with Holly at his side. While not a true BDSM story their relationship clearly has D/s tones to it. Both Nick and Holly are well drawn and the book also has a nice cast of supporting characters.

One Real Thing is quite an emotional, at times very angst-filled, story but there are lighter moments as well which helped balance the overall feel of the story. The sex is scorching hot but it's the emotional connection between Nick and Holly that really makes this such a great story. Highly recommended.



I received this book from Net Galley for review.

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent m/m romance about two guys who were best friends in college. One got married and started a career and followed a path of things he felt he should do. The other slowly spiraled down and out of control. This book was, at times, not an easy read. It left me feeling gutted more than once. But it's so very worth reading to find out for yourself if either of them can be saved...

[Amy · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book just wasn't for me. For one thing, it took way too long to get going. I love angst and UST (probably more than most people!), but I was at least half way through the book before Nick and Holly even got together. Frankly I was bored and I didn't really connect with the characters. Oh well. On to the next book...

[Kassa · Rating 3 out of 5]

One Real Thing is an easy story to read and engaging for the most part. There is a friends turned lovers theme with repressed angst and longing that will play on those lovely romance heart strings of readers. The writing skillfully keeps the characters moving towards each other but once the couple gets together, the story could have ended there. The next 50 pages or so just reiterate how in love the two men are with no real appreciable changes. Nothing much is added to the relationship or the couple, though I was happy to finally get some sexual tension and sex happening. An interesting story but the ending lets it down.

The story shows how long time friends who always had a crush on each other break down individually and need the other person there to help them back. First is Holly’s turn to hit rock bottom as his drug and alcohol habit lead him in a downward spiral that could end tragically. Nick takes control and drags Holly back to New York, hiding him away while he recovers from years of abusing himself. Holly eventually recovers and finds a good job with an adorable and entertaining couple. Now it’s Nick’s turn to hit bottom as his marriage and career end, leaving Holly to pick up the pieces.

The basic plot in and of itself is well crafted. There is a nice symmetry to the men that shows they need each other and lean on each other in similar and different ways. Holly’s breakdown is very engaging. His emotions and fear come across as does his deep longing for Nick. There are a few minor issues that came up while reading this – such as the relatively easy detox and recovery, Nick’s obtuse behavior, Caroline’s over the top bitchiness – but these are minor and easily ignored in favor of the interesting story and compelling characters. Holly is really the star with his vulnerable emotions and desperate grasp for stability in some way.

Unfortunately when it’s Nick’s turn to break down the story takes a shift. There is a D/s component that is added in somewhat oddly with Holly being incredibly submissive and subservient. I didn’t mind the twist to Holly’s personality but it didn’t always feel natural. The whirlwind of chaos that supposedly made up Holly for so many years completely and utterly transforms into a quiet submissive happy to kneel at Nick’s feet in front of his friends. It’s not a bad change but doesn’t make much sense in the context provided. Holly feels inconsistent and manipulated.

Likewise Nick also feels inconsistent. I couldn’t get a good grasp on his character and motives. There is some vague family history that supposedly propelled Nick towards the marriage and career he chose but it doesn’t add much to Nick’s character since it’s so vague. I also couldn’t understand why Nick and Holly never got together in college. At first I thought it was because Nick was straight but later references refute this so I was left wondering why it took so long for the two to admit their feelings. Once Nick and Holly do get together, they immediately fall in love – which makes sense given their history – and the story spends the last part showing sex, Holly as a submissive, and showing how their life will be together. This is nice since the two don’t have sex until the last 1/3rd of the story but not really compelling or necessary to the story.

The writing is very good with the narrative in third person. Sometimes the pronouns would get confused and I couldn’t quite figure out whose point of view was being told. Not head hopping really but a muddled viewpoint that’s not clear. Other than that, the story moves along pretty quickly up to the end and the characters are engaging and interesting. It’s a nice story and I particularly liked Holly for most of the book. Unfortunately the last part brings the book down and takes away from the better written, more interesting beginning. Either way I think this will be of interest to romance fans and a good story to recommend.

[Beck · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a wonderful book. I loved the fact that the authors took the time to write a back story so that the eventual relationship made perfect sense … This book is co-dependency at its best. Holly is adrift in the world and needs boundaries to feel safe. Nick finds peace in creating these boundaries. Unlike other BDSM books where the TPE seems contrived and based on a sexual foundation, Nick and Holly's relationship was about serving each other's needs. Holly is a 'natural' submissive. Not because he is a weak person but because he delights in showing his love via his 'service' to Nick. Nick isn't all that Alpha but he delights in accepting what Holly is willing to give … Other reviewers (on Amazon) have said that they found Nick's ignorance about his bi-sexuality unbelievable. I think this was nicely explained by his need to conform to the ideals of 'best practice' in life. He made CHOICES based on expectations from society and family; then suppressed his true needs and desires to live up to the choices he made. I don't think this is abnormal given the pressures people are under from society to conform … I also didn't find Holly's subservience incongruous. He was described early in the book as affectionate and tactile. Given his barren childhood (aloof father, sick mother and resentful siblings) and his need for reassurance, his desire for 'petting' and affection is perfectly understandable … Most books of the genre expect me to suspend belief and forgive major plot holes. This book was so well written that I could relax into the story and go along for the ride. Just lovely.

[Nic · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nick and Holly have been friends for years, although apart for many of these because of Nick's wife (who dislikes Holly).

Nick, who has always felt the need to take care of Holly, needs to rescue him when he hits rock bottom. Holly needs Nick and the rules he sets down for him.

There is an interesting turn in the plot where situations are reversed and it is Holly's turn to help Nick. Although Nick has an immense desire to look after Holly and Holly needs to submit to Nick, Holly shows how much he has recovered and has the strength to support Nick as he deals with major issues in his life.

A nicely written friends-to-lovers story with a happy ending. A story of friendship and love with some elements of submission.

3.5 stars

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful friends to lover’s story. The love and devotion that these two friends share throughout the story is beautiful & absolute. Holly’s role reversal for Nick hit me in the feels and the D/s element was more like a quiet surrender to love. The wicked witch of a wife is bit overplayed in this genre but for this gfy/ofy it worked for this story line so I’ll keep the 5 star rating PLUS I always love a good villain in my books.

Reread 10/28/14

[Lyn❤Loves❤Listening to Real Voices Only!!!!❤️🎧📚 Addict ON HIATUS]

76% dnf just not feeling it

[Kaje Harper · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has two interesting, complex main characters. Holly is perhaps the more intriguing. The symmetry of the MC's taking care of each other as each needs it in turn is nice. The way they interact, slowly acknowledging a love that has been there all along, is satisfying. I did wish Nick's wife had been a little more well-rounded. This can't have been an easy situation for her and the plot could have worked without her being such a bitch. The one thing that didn't quite work for me was the dom-sub tone that developed in the relationship of the MC's. At times it didn't seem natural with Holly's personality. Still, well worth the read.

[Trio · Rating 2 out of 5]

Did not work for me. Two dimensional characters and a predictable plot. Meh. Also, the weakest BDSM D/s relationship which could have been so much more.

[Janna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Genre & keywords:
M/M, Romance, Contemporary, Friends to Lovers, Gay For You-ish, Infidelity, Addiction, Hitting rock bottom, D/s-ish elements

Synopsis in short:
Nick and Holly have been friends forever but live in different parts of the country and have lost sight from each other. Until Holly makes the tabloids thanks to some celebrity, and it becomes apparent that his bad habits are making him hit rock bottom hard. Nick comes to his rescue, once more, and takes him with him to New York. Slowly it becomes clear that their feelings for each other go beyond friendship. But Nick is married.

Setting: A great part of the story takes place in New York, in the apartment Nick has rented for Holly. After Holly's recovery he moves to a different city and travels a lot for his new job, but even then the New York apartment is still an important part of the setting.

POV: The point of view, in third person, alternates between Nick and Holly, per chapter.

H/H & characterization: Talk about heroes with flaws: these guys have tons of them. Especially Holly is rather self-destructive and his attitude at the beginning of the story is difficult to like. Nick’s most important flaw is his infidelity towards his wife and towards his own feelings. However their characterization is done wonderfully: We get a detailed and thorough view on these heroes and we are made a close witness to their emotions, thoughts and feelings. This makes them well-rounded characters who become more and more irresistible and loveable. I loved the stilled moments between them where it seemed no outside world existed and where they grew closer and closer to each other. Nick’s lies to his wife didn’t bother me very much thanks to the way his behavior was explained via his perspective. Maybe his wife was a bit too conveniently cold-hearted, but what mattered to me were Nick’s feelings toward her and his marriage. Those were shown clearly and gave an insight in his choices.

Empathy level: Thanks to the alternating perspectives and the very close look we get, it’s really easy to empathize with both Holly and Nick. We’re there every step it takes them to come to the realization they’re meant for each other. This is something that takes Nick more time than Holly, because he’s the one with another (female!) partner. I had a little more difficulty with understanding the whole D/s thing that starts to develop between them once they become a couple. From Holly’s point of view it’s explained a little bit better than it’s from Nick’s, but this aspect of their relationship left me in riddles altogether.

Heat level: It takes Nick and Holly two thirds of the pages to share a first kiss. By then, months have passed since the beginning of the book. The first two thirds of the book consist of a long slow build-up with a lot of tension and then the hot stuff takes place - finally, but well-timed. The smexy scenes were well-written, with emotional depth, and were definitely hot, but all the foot kissing was I bit too much for me. Also, I was a little confused to learn during a bed scene that Nick apparently had gay sex before (years ago in college). Until then I was under the impression that this was a ‘gay for you’ themed story. This made me instantly wonder why Nick and Holly hadn’t hooked up earlier on in their friendship. I think it was unnecessary to mention this, because it didn’t add anything to the story, except confusion. 2 out of 3 flames

Angst level: This is an intense story. First we get a lot of heaviness when the focus is on Holly’s addiction problems and later we get more when Nick experiences his own break-down. But this book also has some lighter moments and once Holly is recovered he’s a delightful character. Especially when he’s together with Danner, his new boss and friend, with whom he has a lot in common, like their sense of humor. Those scenes are joyful. But these are definitely outnumbered by the more heart-squeezing, emotional moments. 2 out of 3 hankies

Overall entertainment level: The writing style of this author duo has a way of drawing you in their story real deep and very fast. I started reading the book in the late evening and I couldn’t put it down until early in the morning. And I happily gave up those few hours of sleep. It’s a character-driven story, just how I like them. Nick and Holly kept me engrossed from beginning to end, even when they made me lightly frown a few times during the last part of the book. I regretted finishing their story because I didn’t want to leave them yet. So yeah, this was definitely a highly entertaining and enjoyable read for me.

Final judgment:
Best friends have to hit rock bottom before finding happiness together in an emotional, enthralling story that could’ve done with less foot kissing.
4.75 out of 5 stars
~

Holly cupped Nick’s face with slick hands as he met Nick partway. There was nothing tentative or teasing about the way Holly kissed. It was sweet and tender and open with the gentle brush of Holly’s tongue over Nick’s lips.
It wasn’t anything Nick had expected—it was better. He met Holly’s tongue with his own, tasting him. Holly was every bit as delicious as Nick had ever imagined him to be and more. He teased at Holly’s tongue and then slowly pulled back to press light kisses to Holly’s lips.

http://www.rarelydustybooks.com/2011/...

[Laurie (barksbooks) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nick and Hollister (Holly) were best friends through their college years despite their differences. Outgoing and flirtatious Holly’s attempts to get Nick’s undivided attention never ended with the result Holly secretly craved. Holly was deeply in love with Nick from the beginning and afraid he’d lose him forever if he revealed his feelings. And then Nick met Caroline, a snooty bitch who instantly saw Holly as a threat and drove a wedge between them. When they marry it is the beginning of a downward spiral for Holly who can’t seem to function without Nick nearby to save him from himself. A few years later Holly has learned to self-medicate with dangerous behavior, sex, booze and drugs resulting in the loss of a successful career and his recent lover. He’s about to hit rock bottom when Nick catches wind of his condition and swoops in to rescue his best friend despite the demands of Caroline. Nick never could keep his eyes off the mess that was Holly and this time around years of pent up feelings explode into a world of messiness that changes their relationship.

This was a very angsty character driven romance and those are typically my favorite kind of romances but I had an issue or two with this one that keeps it from venturing into 5 star territory. . I have unlimited tolerance for inner torment and too sweet to be believed characters like Holly but I’m so tired of the one dimensional stereotypical selfish wife/mother/father/sister character. I’m sure these folks exist in real life but do they have to pop up in so many frigging romances to create distance? Just because Nick tried to keep up appearances and didn’t want to face his attraction to Holly, doesn’t mean that Nick’s wife has to be the evil, self-centered bitch and the way she was dispatched right outta their lives ticked me off.

Phew, glad that’s out of the way. Despite my issues with Caroline, I thought this was a lovely little Dom/sub romance filled with longing looks, tender touches, sweet cuddling and eventually plenty of hot, loving sex and it did a fantastic job of getting into Holly’s head. I understood his pain, his desire to please Nick and ached with him but I am a sucker for these types, I admit it. Nick, on the other hand, felt to me like he got the shaft (ha, finally!) when it came to understanding how he ticked. He was nice enough and all and a bit of a hot mess himself but I emphasized more with Holly possibly because he was so innocent and easily wounded despite his wicked ways and gorgeous exterior. When Nick’s life unraveled there for a bit I felt bad but also a little manipulated at the same time (which comes around to stereotypical Caroline again).

However, Nick’s desire for Holly is never in question and is beautifully described:

“Where are we having lunch?”

Nick hadn’t really thought that far ahead. “The Westway,” he decided. “Over on Ninth. Should I meet you there?”

“Yeah, I’ll find it.” Holly was making quiet noises that were probably him wriggling out of his pajama pants without getting out of bed again. God, Nick really shouldn’t know what those noises were, and he wasn’t thinking about the visuals that went with them. And he shouldn’t know how Holly’s hair smelled when it was damp from sleep, how bitter it was when Holly was sick and how spicy and honeyed it was when Holly was well. Nick’s head hit the wall behind him, and he scrubbed a hand over his face, reeling his mind in from all the places it shouldn’t be going.”

Beautiful, no?

In the end, their relationship was a bit co-dependent, both of them are broken on some level and certain bits of the story do tip-toe straight into Unhealthytown but it worked for me and I couldn’t put the book down once I started it because I had to know Holly would end up ok.

[Emanuela ~plastic duck~ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nick and Holly have been friends since college, but they can't be so close anymore because Nick's girlfriend - and later wife - can't stand Holly.

Holly works in PR and he's living dangerously. Since his last relationship finished for the delight of gossip, he's entered a downward destructive spiral. Nick, who took care of Holly when they were at college, follows him from afar, but he can't stand watching Holly's destructive behavior. He flies to L.A., keeping it a secret from his wife, and takes Holly back to New York with him, helping him build his life again. When Holly is finally on his feet, Nick has to face the end of his own life in every aspect and Holly is the one who has to rescue him.

The book was PERFECT until the 60% of it, that is until the tables were turned. Up to that moment the authors built anticipation, uncovered the demons of their protagonists, suggested a co-dependency that skirted the dominance/submission territory. It was all very subtle and mind blowing. Then there was Nick's crisis and two things happened: First, I had the impression the two halves of the story were told with less heart and in a more stylistic way, the similarities between Holly's earlier predicament and Nick's present situations were too symmetrical, even in their differences, because Holly had to fight addiction while Nick had to fight a sort of apathy. Second, the dominance/submission element becomes more apparent, it's spelled out, and suddenly it's the most important dynamics in their relationship. So, when at the beginning Holly kneeling and kissing Nick's feet, while asking for forgiveness for his bad decisions, was hot and shocking in a good way, later it became almost void of strength, because it missed the initial urgency.

Also I couldn't understand why Nick decided to marry his bitchy wife. He clearly tells that he consciously made this decision, and to me it's the decision of a weak man, not of a dominant personality. All the relationship with his wife smelled wrong, she was the one dictating the rules of their relationship, he accepted to let Holly go. It's true that he later did anything to help Holly, but keeping it hidden from his wife was another sign of weakness. It was Caroline, the wife, who prompted him to change his life and refocus. What I wanted to see was Nick going to Caroline and tell her he was choosing Holly for once, because it was the decent thing to do. Bottom line: I didn't like Nick so much, and I didn't believe his strength.

It's one of the most believable friends-to-lovers story, it was built on great premises, but the great tension wasn't kept high till the end of the book. It's 5 stars for the first part and 3 for the second part, so it's 4 stars overall. Recommended though, it's a beautiful story.