Bookaholic Anonymous discussion

I don't. I believe in attraction at first sight; a strong pull to be near the other person, to talk and get to know him. I do not believe actual love can happen at first sight, though. I like seeing the characters build their love, to understand exactly what makes them love one another and how they fit.

What do you think?

I totally agree. I definitely do not believe in instalove. That's why I cringe when that happens in books. Attraction, lust, yes. That can happen. But love comes with understanding and knowing the person. It starts either from friendship or attraction.
There's this awesome Japanese phrase "Koi No Yokan" which means that you see a person and know that falling in love with them will be inevitable :)

I agree with you Ishita! Totally!
That's an awesome Japanese saying :> I love Japan!
Well, if you hate insta-love - never read Switched by Amanda Hocking. It's one of the worst cases of instant love I've ever seen. And, I wanted to kill myself throughout that book because of it. If I hadn't bought it I would've never finished it.

I love Japanese! And Spanish. And Arabic. (view spoiler)[I'm seriously obsessed with languages. (hide spoiler)]
Haha, okay. It's not really my kinda book. And I'd seen your review. Put me off even more. Elaborate about the instalove thingy :)
I don't get it. How can you across the room and look into someone's eyes and decide that person's your soulmate?! NO. Just... no.

I'm obsessed with languages too!
If you've seen my review - I've elaborated about it enough xD

Forget deciding he's your soul mate--how can you decide a person who acts like a total jerk to you is your soul mate!? I mean, at least chose a nice soul mate! XD

Hahahaha. Heroines in some books are so dumb. Nice guys are always friend-zoned and jackasses swooned over. Me don't like :(

Me agrees! It drives me insane!
At least, if you're gonna give us insta-love, give as a hero we can understand why she likes!

I don't believe in love at first sight, but I do kind of believe in attraction at first sight.

I don't believe in love at first sight, but I admit that I enjoy reading the young adult novels that have the instalove plotline. It doesn't bother me that it isn't realistic. I don't typically read books for realism but more for escape, and I really like the concept of "soulmates" even if I don't think that actually exists in real life.

@Kayla: I love the idea of soul mates, of love meant to be, I just hate when the only reason for someone to love the other is because they're their soul mate. Like, "why do you love him?"
"He's my soul mate."
"Yes, but what in him makes you love him?"
"... That he's my soul mate?"
"... Okay, and why do you tolerate all those moments in which he's a jerk?"
"That's easy! He's my soul mate! :>"
=-=
I like it when I can see and feel the reason the fall for one another, be truly sure they're mean for each other, and in those cases I can tolerate and even enjoy insta-love, like which I adore, even if I don't believe in the concept. But in other cases it drives me mad.

I don't believe in love at first sight

Claire~Cool Beans~`EpicShadowstar`-PokeMaster- wrote: "I don't believe in love at first sight, but I do kind of believe in attraction at first sight."

Me too! I totally agree.

Nitzan wrote: "@Kayla: I love the idea of soul mates, of love meant to be, I just hate when the only reason for someone to love the other is because they're their soul mate. Like, "why do you love him?"
"He's my ..."

Nitzan, you are insanely funny. And yes, that is really irritating.

@Ishita: Don't laugh, it's totally serious xDDD (though I'm always happy to make people laugh :>) There are some heroines that fit that conversation perfectly, and I don't know about you but I think that's just sad! and annoying as hell...

@Eden: I will read the next books for Rhys only xD I really like him and I want to see how the entire family deals with him and Wendy and all that.
But I'm not in any hurry to read it, if you get what I mean...

Nope.

I enjoy about love at first sight plot in books, but in real life no... I think that to love someone you have to get to know him or her... at first sight is more like a mutual attraction :)

Stephany wrote: "I enjoy about love at first sight plot in books, but in real life no... I think that to love someone you have to get to know him or her... at first sight is more like a mutual attraction :)"

Well, I can enjoy love at first sight in books - if it's done well. Most of the time, though, it bugs the hell out of me xD

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, I almost believed in it. ALMOST.
I went to school one day and a guy started talking to me and in that moment, for the fist time in my life, I felt myself falling in love.
I thought it was the first time I'd seen the guy, but when I think back, it turns out that I had seen him several times before and it was just the craziness of the moment (I was glad he finally talked to me). "Koi No Yokan" like Ishita said, I think...
So no, I don't believe it.
Besides, love is something that has to grow, and it grows very slowly (I think, I don't have any experience :P )

I agree, Anna - love has to grow. Now, some books do manage to convince me of that love (in the book), but most it's just... BAM they're in love.

I am a hopeless romantic so yes, I believe in love at first sight! Do I think it happens as often as books would have us believe, no, but I do believe it can happen. Why? Because it happened to me. I was 17 when I first saw my husband-to-be. I was working at a family restaurant and he walked through the door and I was his and he didn't even know it yet. The heart wants what it wants and sometimes we are prisoner to its will. Some would argue that it was lust at first sight but I know lust (I knew it then and I know it know). What I felt for that man when I first laid eyes on him made my chest ache and challenged my independence as my rationale took a backseat and love took over. I’ve been enjoying the ride ever since.

That's a lovely story, Tanjlisa! I hope something that lovely happens to me :]

Thanks, Nitzan. It can!! Just don't settle!!

I never believed in love at first sight. I always thought that people who said that we're just physically attracted to the other person.
Then ....
It happened to me and my husband.

He said when he first saw me a voice popped into head that said" She's going to be your wife"
I didn't know he even existed at the time.

To be continued..

I don't believe in love at first sight.
For me love just isn't enough I need to like the person as well. I'm not a great person for first impressions and I don't believe one look can tell me if we are truly compatible. My husband is my best friends and we were friends first.
My Dad does though. He says it was love at first sight with my Mum.

Oh, Astrid, that's a lovely story! <3

Esther, I agree. I think love develops over time, though attraction-on-first-sight is definitely possible.

Nitzan wrote: "Oh, Astrid, that's a lovely story! <3

Esther, I agree. I think love develops over time, though attraction-on-first-sight is definitely possible."

For me attraction-on-first-sight is more like a crush. I think that people who experience love at first sight have to be the type of people for which 'love conquers all' unless they believe that their first look is some magical psychic connection ( I do believe the the human brain is so miraculous that sometimes we know things without knowing we know them).
For me it doesn't work that way. However I do believe in true-love.

I believe in true love as well! I hope to find it <3

I don't

No. I do not believe in LOVE at first sight. I totally think immediate attraction is possible, but not love. Love must develop over time, once you get to know that person.