Totally Original discussion

This is where you can tell jokes, any jokes! No dirty jokes though, please.

Have you heard about that guy who got his entire left side cut off?
Well, he is all right now!

My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better!

Thats good.

How many Psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but the light bulb has to want to change!

How many alchoholics does it take to change a light bulb?
Eight. One to hold the bulb, and the other seven to drink until the room spins.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how thin you slice them.

Sorry if that was a bit harsh, but no one said anyhting about black humour.

Lazlo you will like this one:
When was Heisenberg born?
Oh, that's very uncertain.

Here is another:
Rene Descartes sits down for lunch at a Parisian restaurant. The waitress asks for his order. He orders a hamburger.
The waitress inquires, "Would you like fries with that? " Descartes says, "I think not," ...and instantly disappears.

Q: Does light have mass?
A: Of course not. It's not even Catholic!!!

What do lazy dogs do for fun?
Chase parked cars!

A priest, a duck, a nun, an Irishman, a rabbi, a Christian, a horse, and a helicopter pilot walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says: "Is this some kind of joke?"

lol

Monkeyduels wrote: "Lazlo you will like this one:
When was Heisenberg born?
Oh, that's very uncertain.

Here is another:
Rene Descartes sits down for lunch at a Parisian restaurant. The waitress asks for his order. He..."

That is a good one.

Heisenberg and Schrodinger are driving down the street in a car and they get pulled over by a cop and the cop asks,"Do you know how fast you were going!?" and Heisenberg responds,"No, but I can tell you where I was." The cop thinks this is an odd response and checks the trunk, where he finds a dead cat. The cop asks,"Do you know there is a dead cat in your trunk!?" and Schrodinger says,"Well, I do now."

i thought u wood like it cause u said ur into physics

(Holds out fist.) "Punch it!"

*punches fist extremely hard*

"That was awesome. Next time, one of us jumps of a building onto a fist!"

how about u jump first?

Ok. Ready?

*pushes Lazlo off and stays where she is*

"That... was... so......... cool!!!!!"

A guy walks into a bar with a cheese sandwich under one arm and sits down at the counter. "I'll have a beer for me and the cheese sandwich",he says. The bartender looks up and says, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."

Laszlo wrote: "(Holds out fist.) "Punch it!""

Zelda says you say that alllllll the time!

Zelda is cool. Really cool. Really really really really really really really cool. Don't tell her, though.

Please, don't tell Zelda.

A guy walks into a bar with a block of cement under one arm. He walks up to the bar tender and says, "One for me, and one for the road".

Why did Sarah fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Not Sarah.

How many psychoanalysts does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but the bulb has to want to change.

Hey, I did that one earlier!

Oh. Err.. My bad. I apologise. I congradulate you on your sense of humour, as well.

This only has like 30 posts, how did I manage that?

33.

Argon walks into a bar. The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here". Argon doesn't react.

You know Hank Green.

I'm afraid I don't. Should I?

He did an entire video with theses jokes sent in by Nerdfighters!

I'll have to look this up.

No! Don't!

?

There are a few inappropriate things on the Vlogbrothers's YouTube channel.

Your talking to the guy who just posted a joke about a girl with no arms. Still mantain that reason?

Yep.

Your comments are having the effect of a big red button, but I think you may know that.

Watch at your own ri-isk!

I do all things at my own risk. Well, most things anyway.

But don't come complaining to me, okay.

I think I can manage that.

Good.

Laszlo wrote: "Please, don't tell Zelda."

Why?