SciFi and Fantasy Book Club discussion

Some of us seem to read book blurbs and make purchasing decisions based on them? What are the superlative blurbs out there? Are there any examples of book blurbs that will never get your money? (Please, no examples of the poorly edited. I'm more curious about the style of blurb that doesn't work for you. I think it's safe to assume we all want to read a blurb that exhibits a mastery of the language in which the story is told :-) )

Why do you like or dislike this blurb?

Here is a blurb that stood out to me from The Fifth Season:

THIS IS THE WAY THE WORLD ENDS... FOR THE LAST TIME.
A season of endings has begun.
It starts with the great red rift across the heart of the world's sole continent, spewing ash that blots out the sun.
It starts with death, with a murdered son and a missing daughter.
It starts with betrayal, and long dormant wounds rising up to fester.
This is the Stillness, a land long familiar with catastrophe, where the power of the earth is wielded as a weapon. And where there is no mercy.

The intro line really caught my attention. It seemed to say "no, we're not like the other post-apocalyptic, teen-led things you've seen lately."

The juxtaposition between ending and starting was startling, and the repetition gave me a little feel for how Jemisin writes. It spoke to the hostility we discover in the book, and hinted at magic much less benign than a lot of fantasy we read.

Kushiel's Dart

Blurb

When love cast me out,
it was Cruelty that took pity on me.

The land of Terre d'Ange is a place of unsurpassing beauty and grace. It is said that angels found the land and saw it was good... and the ensuing race that rose from the seed of angels and men live by one simple rule: Love as thou wilt.

Phèdre nó Delaunay is a young woman who was born with a scarlet mote in her left eye. Sold into indentured servitude as a child, her bond is purchased by Anafiel Delaunay, a nobleman with very a special mission... and the first one to recognize who and what she is: one pricked by Kushiel's Dart, chosen to forever experience pain and pleasure as one.

Phèdre is trained equally in the courtly arts and the talents of the bedchamber, but, above all, the ability to observe, remember, and analyze. Almost as talented a spy as she is courtesan, Phèdre stumbles upon a plot that threatens the very foundations of her homeland. Treachery sets her on her path; love and honor goad her further. And in the doing, it will take her to the edge of despair... and beyond. Hateful friend, loving enemy, beloved assassin; they can all wear the same glittering mask in this world, and Phèdre will get but one chance to save all that she holds dear.

Set in a world of cunning poets, deadly courtiers, heroic traitors, and a truly Machiavellian villainess, this is a novel of grandeur, luxuriance, sacrifice, betrayal, and deeply laid conspiracies. Not since Dune has there been an epic on the scale of Kushiel's Dart-a massive tale about the violent death of an old age, and the birth of a new.

The first two lines of this book caught me and carried me away. This blurb - for me - hinted at so much goodness that I bought it right away. This was back when bookstores were plentiful and I located it by happenstance.

I was so happy to be right and I LOVED this book. I ended up reading this series and the one after. Never picked up the 3rd trilogy since it's set 1,000 years in the future.

Allison wrote: "Here is a blurb that stood out to me from The Fifth Season:

THIS IS THE WAY THE WORLD ENDS... FOR THE LAST TIME.
A season of endings has begun.
It starts with the great red rift a..."

That does sound good! I think I own this one already - Have quite a few Jemisin books (that I haven't read yet). I really need to read her first series...


ETA: Nope. I have the Killing Moon.

MrsJoseph wrote: "Have quite a few Jemisin books (that I haven't read yet). I really need to read her first series..."

Which is this months fantasy read

IKR?! I just finished up The Android's Dream last night.

So many books, so little time...

I keep forgetting to post a funny one. On A Murder in Time by Julie McElwain the blurb says:

"Beautiful and brilliant, Kendra Donovan is a rising star at the FBI. Yet her path to professional success hits a speed bump during a disastrous raid where half her team is murdered, a mole in the FBI is uncovered and she herself is severely wounded. As soon as she recovers, she goes rogue and travels to England to assassinate the man responsible for the deaths of her teammates"

Apparently her entire team being murdered is a mere "speed bump". I wanted to read this until I saw that.

Gosh, don't you hate that? Show up for work, all your friends die and you have to go avenge their deaths? It's like getting your take out and realizing they forgot you didn't want mayo.

MrsJoseph wrote: "Kushiel's Dart

Blurb


When love cast me out,
it was Cruelty that took pity on me.

The land of Terre d'Ange is a place of unsurpassing beauty and..."

I'm reading this now! Finally. Only a decade late to the party. I love the first two lines. It's interesting because for me the rest of this is less appealing. It's so wordy! Do you also read the first couple pages before buying?

Into The Abyss

This one is probably my favorite.

Turns out: "The Demon Weed" really is a Gateway Drug!

Who knew?

Tom Perkinje certainly didn't. He had never smoked anything in his life, but as the new kid in town trying to make friends, he'd gone to a party and had foolishly let his new buddy Reggie talk him into trying a joint that he'd picked up from a new dealer.

Before he knew it, Tom was having a seriously bad trip; a total out of body experience where the world had dissolved around him. A few puffs in and he'd gotten this massive case of tunnel vision where the entire party seemed to be happening at the other end of a long tunnel; soon it was like he was having this weird out of body experience looking down at himself.

The next thing Tom knew, there were these deranged myopic wizards from some place called Astlan calling on him in some sort of pig Latin mumbo jumbo. They had somehow mistaken Tom for a demon! He tried to flee but the wizards were relentless and were determined to conjure him into their world and bind him as their demon slave for all of eternity!

Oh, yeah, and those crazy wizards? Turns out they were going to war and planned to use their new demon slave as a secret weapon to obliterate the enemy!

Allison wrote: "I'm reading this now! Finally. Only a decade late to the party. I love the first two lines. It's interesting because for me the rest of this is less appealing. It's so wordy! Do you also read the first couple pages before buying?"

I don't remember but probably. I'm one of those people you see sitting on the floor in the bookstore with a bunch of books around me, lol.

But you're right - it IS a rather wordy (almost overwritten) book. I found a lot of it to be indulgent but I loved everything about the worldbuilding and the decadence of Terre d'Ange.

Aaron wrote: "Into The Abyss

This one is probably my favorite.

Turns out: "The Demon Weed" really is a Gateway Drug!

Who knew?

Tom Perkinje certainly didn't. He had never smoked anything in h..."

That sounds like a trippy read!

Aaron wrote: "Into The Abyss

This one is probably my favorite.

Turns out: "The Demon Weed" really is a Gateway Drug!

Who knew?

Tom Perkinje certainly didn't. He had never smoked anything in h..."

Aaron, there's definite tone there! What is it you like about it?

MrsJ: The book is wordy, too but I don't mind that. I meant the blurb is very long. Do you prefer longer blurbs?

It's a case by case basis for me. I just want to blurb to tantalize me.

My "gateway drug" into Fantasy was Winds of Fate:

High Magic had been lost to Valdemar centuries ago when the last Herald-Mage gave his life to save the kingdom from destruction by dark sorceries. Yet now the realm is at risk again. And Elspeth, Herald and heir to the throne, must take up the challenge, abandoning her home to find a mentor who can awaken her untrained mage abilities.

But others, too, are being caught up in a war against sorcerous evil. The Tayledras scout Darkwind is the first to stumble across the menace creeping forth from the "Uncleansed Lands." And as sorcery begins to take its toll, Darkwind may be forced to call upon powers he has sworn never to use agin if he and his people are to survive an enemy able to wreak greater devastation with spells of destruction than with swords...

It has a much shorter blurb. Of course, that cover! It has everything I need: The horse! That purple! And a woman holding a sword. *swoon*

Allison wrote: "I meant the blurb is very long. Do you prefer longer blurbs? "


I sort of feel bad commenting, 'cause I haven't shared any good blurbs... mostly because I have a shite memory for such things, and would have to go digging, and I'm lazy...

But...

I will say I, personally, do not like long blurbs. I've been accused of having a short attention span now and again... and blurbs is one of those places where I'm tempted to agree.

If you can't hook me in the first couple of lines of the blurb, then it doesn't look good for you. If I start zoning out after the 4th paragraph of your blurb, then I'm over you.

I prefer short ones also. If it takes me more than maybe 30 seconds I'm bored and move on, without reading the book.

MrsJoseph wrote: "It's a case by case basis for me. I just want to blurb to tantalize me.

My "gateway drug" into Fantasy was Winds of Fate:


High Magic had been lost to Valdemar centuries ago when t..."

Now THAT is classic!

I know this book isn't everyone's favorite, but I was attracted by the blurb for Altered Carbon:

It's the twenty-fifth century, and advances in technology have redefined life itself. A person's consciousness can now be stored in the brain and downloaded into a new body (or "sleeve"), making death nothing more than a minor blip on a screen. Onetime U.N. Envoy Takeshi Kovacs has been killed before, but his last death was particularly painful. Resleeved into a body in Bay City (formerly San Francisco), Kovacs is thrown into the dark heart of a shady, far-reaching conspiracy that is vicious even by the standards of a society that treats existence as something that can be bought and sold. For Kovacs, the shell that blew a hole in his chest was only the beginning.

I had so many questions! How many times has he died? How does he feel about dying? What makes one worse than another? What does society look like when you can live forever? It is also blissfully short.

I confess to rarely remembering good blurbs, but the stinkers will stick in my memory like.... I don't know, something really sticky.

So here are some blerg's I've collected lately:

Stehanie is a young woman who has been seduced by a supermodel, whose lesbian skills rocked her world.

Starts off by misspelling the title character's name (the book is called Stephanie!)

But the real killer is the "lesbian skills". As a gamer, I immediately thought "How do you level those up? Must be a real grind. Are there heterosexual skills too? I wonder what level I am?" Did not buy that book.

Isis was an undercover operative for Moon Hunter’s Inc. most of the time. She has gone into the most dangerous and scariest places there were and she did things that made her skin crawl to get her job done. Cash wants to send her in undercover in the latest lab he’s found, but there’s a catch. He wants her to work with a government operative named Steve Gorman. She’s been involved with Steve before and that’s just not going to work.

Awkward tenses much? Did not buy this book.

Bob Marley Levi Donovan is best friend and wingman to Keanu Lee. He is also his business partner in Limbitless Tees. (There is a pun in there, folks.)

I'm not sure which is worse: The pun, the hilarious celebrity madlib character naming, or the fact the pun has to be pointed out explicitly. Did not buy this book.

And a couple I posted ages ago on another group's bad blurbs thread:

By the author of the SERIES NAME series

On book one of SERIES NAME series. Which is also the author's debut novel. Dear Author, that is not how that works!

All, future astronomer, Memphis Holland wanted was to quit smoking.

I knew there had to be people out there who love commas more than I do. But future astronomer? Huh? An astronomer in the future? An astrologer? What the heck is that. Turns out, she's an astronomer who gains the ability to see the future. I actually came really close to buying this one (it's still on my maybe list), because that first sentence once you figure out the future astronomer thing, is actually quite a hook - it makes me want to know why she can't manage it.

Oh, I would have thought she was going to be an astronomer some day.

And yeah, if you have to point out a pun then it just ain't working.

Allison wrote: "Aaron, there's definite tone there! What is it you like about it?"

I really like it's very first line that comes off as a good joke and sets the tone of what the story is and what it is all at once.

Honestly the rest of the blurb could probably be cut down a little but, it tells me what sub-genre the book is in and what to expect.

Most blurbs just try to give me a plot summary rather than focus on what makes this book different. Like for example if you have generic mil space opera book #1123142134 don't start off telling me yep so and so is generic backstory in generic world...then things happen and war breaks out. You don't need to spend paragraphs telling me that a simple look at the cover could probably tell me that, instead start off with something different about this story and main character/crew and get me to start caring about them as soon as possible.

Aaron wrote: "Most blurbs just try to give me a plot summary rather than focus on what makes this book different. Like for example if you have generic mil space opera book #1123142134 don't start off telling me yep so and so is generic backstory in generic world...then things happen and war breaks out. You don't need to spend paragraphs telling me that a simple look at the cover could probably tell me that, instead start off with something different about this story and main character/crew and get me to start caring about them as soon as possible. "


Dear gods, yes.

I've read so many blurbs recently that are sooooo generic sounding. There is nothing in the blurb that makes it sound any different from the million other books of its ilk.

Which I guess is good, for me, in that it saves me from wanting to read them...

colleen the convivial curmudgeon wrote: "Dear gods, yes.

I've read so many blurbs recently that are sooooo generic sounding. There is nothing in the blurb that makes it sound any different from the million other books of its ilk.

Which I guess is good, for me, in that it saves me from wanting to read them... "


I so agree.

I am a such a blurb person. I think the only time I don't read them is if I'm reading by series or author.
Usually what catches my eye is something different from what I'm used to (Uprooted comes to mind) or something that exemplifies a topic I love to read about (like court intrigue with The Goblin Emperor).

For some reason blurbs that end in questions can grate on my nerves.
"But will MC be able to end goal in time?" "Will MC be able to find the courage to make the hardest choice?"
I guess what I'm getting at here is blurbs that try to be dramatic when I can't feel the tension of the story yet.

I'll also run in the other direction at any sign of a love triangle.

Stephanie wrote: "I am a such a blurb person. I think the only time I don't read them is if I'm reading by series or author.
Usually what catches my eye is something different from what I'm used to ([book:Uprooted|..."

I never thought about it but SO TRUE. I hate those kind of questions...the answer is normally "yes" or a cliffhanger.

And love triangles. We hates them, don't we, precious?

Yes, the question thing is annoying. And so are love triangles.

I will join the manifesto against question blurbs and love triangles.

And the Uprooted blurb must have been good, I had heard of the book before but wasn't sold until I read it! I liked the new definition of dragon and I have lots of questions about what this all means. I think that's the big thing. Blurbs done right should cause the reader to ask questions, Inception-style, rather than spoon feeding them the big "what if" the author tried to construct.

I agree about love triangles. I read a lot of YA, but - 9 times outta 10 - as soon as I see a love triangle set up I'm like...

LMAO

Here's one that I'm currently reading that has a blurb that I really like.

'To have discovered the black tulip, to have seen it for a moment...then to lose it, to lose it forever!'

Cornelius von Baerle, a respectable tulip-grower, lives only to cultivate the elusive black tulip and win a magnificent prize for its creation. But after his powerful godfather is assassinated, the unwitting Cornelius becomes caught up in deadly political intrigue and is falsely accused of high treason by a bitter rival. Condemned to life imprisonment, his only comfort is Rosa, the jailer's beautiful daughter, and together they concoct a plan to grow the black tulip in secret. Dumas' last major historical novel is a tale of romantic love, jealousy and obsession, interweaving historical events surrounding the brutal murders of two Dutch statesman in 1672 with the phenomenon of tulipomania that gripped seventeenth-century Holland.

Firs there's the godfather being assassinated, which definitely piques my interest. Then there's such a dramatic combo of assassination, political intrigue, love, secrets, and... tulipomania. This is a great blurb.

Haha Colleen, you have described my feelings exactly.

Ooh Sarah that is a good blurb. It just worked on me.

They say when viewing art, we often see whatever it is that we most desire the object to be. That what we observe often mirrors that which we wish for ourselves, or feel to be most satisfying to our moods.

What a strange world or mood you must be in, Robert! I hope you find a cool blurb (or blerg) to share with us that tells us more about it.

Okay, I have no idea what the hell that was about but Robert seems to have joined the group specifically to say that. He's been removed from the group because that's entirely inappropriate, whether crude or Krazykiwi bashing.

Must be something going around. We seem to have had a few interesting encounters lately. Thanks, Sarah!

Krazykiwi, I think your profile pic is cute!

colleen the convivial curmudgeon wrote: ""

^this

I was very confused when I read that. So glad to not be alone here, lol.

MrsJoseph wrote: "colleen the convivial curmudgeon wrote: ""

^this

I was very confused when I read that. So glad to not be alone here, lol."


I'm tempted to think Raymond - he of the monumental pretension - created himself a little troll account, though I'd think he'd come after me instead of randomly attacking Krazykiwi. *shrugs*

Krazykiwi was abused earlier in the month on another thread. This guy's tone was much like one of those other guys so I'm wondering if it was him. Or it could be just some really crude dude that likes to be an ass.

Sarah Anne wrote: "Krazykiwi was abused earlier in the month on another thread. This guy's tone was much like one of those other guys so I'm wondering if it was him. Or it could be just some really crude dude that li..."


It's probably that guy. I mean, this just came out of nowhere, otherwise.

So, here's a blurb of a book I'm waiting on... though, admittedly, the title alone was almost enough to get me:

Dracula vs. Hitler

Ravaged by the Nazi Secret Service during World War II, Romanian resistance forces turn to one of their leaders, Professor Van Helsing for any way out. To fight these monstrous forces, Van Helsing raises a legendary monster from centuries of slumber... Prince Dracula himself.

Once he was the ruler of Transylvania. Prince Vlad Dracul, is, above all else, a patriot. He proves more than willing to once again drive out his country’s invaders. Upshot: No one minds if he drinks all the German blood he desires.

In Berlin, when Hitler hears about the many defeats his forces are suffering at the hands of an apparent true vampire, he is seduced by the possibility of becoming immortal. Thus two forces are set upon a collision course, the ultimate confrontation: Superpower against superpower.

Wow. That does spark the imagination doesn't it? Please report back on this one, I'm very curious.

I actually found a "blerg" today for a book I like quite a bit, Spin. I'm going to put spoiler tags around it because it tells ALL THE COOL PARTS so I will give you the blergy blurb here on Goodreads, and then the actual Amazon blurb.

Goodreads:

One night in October when he was ten years old, Tyler Dupree stood in his back yard and watched the stars go out. They all flared into brilliance at once, then disappeared, replaced by a flat, empty black barrier. He and his best friends, Jason and Diane Lawton, had seen what became known as the Big Blackout. It would shape their lives.

Life on Earth is about to get much, much stranger.

Amazon:
Don't read if you have any interest in the book!(view spoiler)[One night in October when he was ten years old, Tyler Dupree stood in his back yard and watched the stars go out. They all flared into brilliance at once, then disappeared, replaced by a flat, empty black barrier. He and his best friends, Jason and Diane Lawton, had seen what became known as the Big Blackout. It would shape their lives.

The effect is worldwide. The sun is now a featureless disk--a heat source, rather than an astronomical object. The moon is gone, but tides remain. Not only have the world's artificial satellites fallen out of orbit, their recovered remains are pitted and aged, as though they'd been in space far longer than their known lifespans. As Tyler, Jason, and Diane grow up, space probe reveals a bizarre truth: The barrier is artificial, generated by huge alien artifacts. Time is passing faster outside the barrier than inside--more than a hundred million years per day on Earth. At this rate, the death throes of the sun are only about forty years in our future.

Jason, now a promising young scientist, devotes his life to working against this slow-moving apocalypse. Diane throws herself into hedonism, marrying a sinister cult leader who's forged a new religion out of the fears of the masses.

Earth sends terraforming machines to Mars to let the onrush of time do its work, turning the planet green. Next they send humans...and immediately get back an emissary with thousands of years of stories to tell about the settling of Mars. Then Earth's probes reveal that an identical barrier has appeared around Mars. Jason, desperate, seeds near space with self-replicating machines that will scatter copies of themselves outward from the sun--and report back on what they find.

Life on Earth is about to get much, much stranger. (hide spoiler)]

The first one is blerg because it does nothing to capture the true scope of the "what if" scenario, or the very human, lovely story unfolding through the sci fi parts.

The second one says EVERY COOL MYSTERY you have to learn! I didn't figure out until more than halfway through what was really going on, and didn't get any of it until it was explained to me, and that made it so much more poignant, because I could empathize with the character's sort of fatalist pragmatism. Who knows what's happening? Better live a life you love. Who knows what the stars are doing? Better love your friends.

Wow, they just summed up the whole book. Who needs to read it now?

Sarah Anne wrote: "Wow, they just summed up the whole book. Who needs to read it now?"

This is my other pet peeve! I remember once reading a 900 page book , and 400 pages in I still hadn't come across a plot point included in the blurb (blerg). I was so annoyed!
This is why I don't read blurbs for ongoing series anymore...can't trust those back covers...

Stephanie wrote: "Sarah Anne wrote: "Wow, they just summed up the whole book. Who needs to read it now?"

This is my other pet peeve! I remember once reading a 900 page book , and 400 pages in I still hadn't come ac..."

So true. Misleading blurbs are at least as bad as overly descriptive ones.

Heh. Sorry about that. I seem to have attracted a troll, although they've stuck to PM so far (briefly - until GR removed their account)..

Water off a duck kiwi's back here - I expect kiwi's do look rather like that when pooping, since they look like that when walking, sitting, or doing just about anything else too, they're oddly put together wee birds :)

I'd rather talk blurbs and blergs: That longer Spin one is awful! The first one is great, I've actually looked at that book and might read it, based just on that blurb. The second one is not even straddling a fine line about giving away too much, it's crossed three lanes and landed in the ditch on the other side.

Krazykiwi wrote: "The second one is not even straddling a fine line about giving away too much, it's crossed three lanes and landed in the ditch on the other side...."

That's a great way to put it :) It's very descriptive.

Krazykiwi wrote: "The second one is not even straddling a fine line about giving away too much, it's crossed three lanes and landed in the ditch on the other side. "

I love this !

Okay, it looks like we have a dedicated troll. I just deleted Robert's third account. Please ignore him until goodreads can boot him permanently.

Sarah Anne wrote: "Okay, it looks like we have a dedicated troll. I just deleted Robert's third account. Please ignore him until goodreads can boot him permanently."

I also have flagged and reported to GR.

I was going through books to nominate for another group, and I came across another blurb I liked.

Even though it's a little cliche, the first two lines of the blurb pulled me in to read the rest:

They say the dead should rest in peace. Not all the dead agree.

One night, Silas Umber’s father Amos doesn’t come home from work. Devastated, Silas learns that his father was no mere mortician but an Undertaker, charged with bringing The Peace to the dead trapped in the Shadowlands, the states of limbo binding spirits to earth. With Amos gone, Silas and his mother have no choice but to return to Lichport, the crumbling seaside town where Silas was born, and move in with Amos’s brother, Charles.

Even as Silas eagerly explores his father’s town and its many abandoned streets and overgrown cemeteries, he grows increasingly wary of his uncle. There is something not quite right going on in Charles Umber’s ornate, museum-like house—something, Silas is sure, that is connected to his father’s disappearance. When Silas’s search leads him to his father’s old office, he comes across a powerful artifact: the Death Watch, a four hundred year old Hadean clock that allows the owner to see the dead.

Death Watch in hand, Silas begins to unearth Lichport’s secret history—and discovers that he has taken on his father’s mantle as Lichport’s Undertaker. Now, Silas must embark on a dangerous path into the Shadowlands to embrace his destiny and discover the truth about his father—no matter the cost.

Stephanie wrote: "This is my other pet peeve! I remember once reading a 900 page book , and 400 pages in I still hadn't come across a plot point included in the blurb (blerg). I was so annoyed!
This is why I don't read blurbs for ongoing series anymore...can't trust those back covers... "


Sometimes I have to remind myself that the blurbs get written after the books, because I find myself getting impatient with a slow book set-up when, because of the blurb, I know that the MC is going to get fired and start a new path, or whatever, because the freaking blurb already told me.

I don't need you to take 250 pages to get there!