it's personal discussion

     
TO WHOEVER IT MAY CONCERN,

this is red. this is bambi. this is naomi bliss. she's seventeen but she's looks thirteen, she'll be eighteen on the twentieth of september, she'll graduate high school in about a year, she'll go to college study whatever interests her, one day she'll get a job and make a steady income. She'll make enough to keep her stupid habits, she get married once she trusts someone enough to not shatter her life, she'll have twins and two other children, she'll learn to play the piano and the violin and own a dog and a big house. In her elderly years she'll get a scorpion and go on luxurious vacations with the love of her life, before she dies peacefully, in a hospital bed surrounded by her loved ones as they doctors unplug her life support. She will debate leaving them all on a cliff hanger, but instead looks at her lover and thanks him. Him and everyone else, she's thanks them for making her life worth living. But this future, this future is not promised. For, she could die tomorrow. And so this journal is born, its purpose being for it to record the daily life, to take in as many memories as it may hold before she passes, so be in in 70 seconds or 70 years.

                                                              I MIGHT DIE TOMORROW
       

       
THEY'LL ASK WHY

WHY try for another journal? why think you can do this one when you've tried countless times before? And the answer is because of simmple things. Things like wanting to hide my book in a library filled with the books of others. Wanting the freedom of doing a bunch of random things in my journal and no one caring. And also, because of jackie. She has a cool journal and I am very jealous and also want a cool journal.

SIDE NOTE: warning, because the author has no filter whatsoever, so the following topics and or such things may be contained within the following journal pages:

. profanities (the use of foul language)
. religious beliefs and doubts
. lack of self confidence
. rap music
. people of color
. love lives
. drug abuse
. college
. the concept of life itself
. law breaking
. depression.
. teenage slang
and most importantly, the author warns you that if you do indeed decide to read on, to learn about her life and read her rants, she may fall desperately in love with you, whether it be platonically or not. You can't help who you get attached to.

ALSO please refrain yourself from posting unnecessary text in my journal. You may comment on what has been said by me or another, but popping in randomly, especially when I don't know you, is rather rude and will not be tolerated. It's not that I don't value your life, I just don't want my journal cluttered with things I don't need in there. If you want to chat, feel free to make your own journal and invite me there. Thank you.

                                    LET THE JOURNAL BEGIN

.... why am i so extra???? literally FORCES it on the intro posts omg.....



extra: if something is extra it's just very dramatic or obnoxious
force: forcing something is making something a bigger deal than it really is
omg: Oh My Gosh or God

i mentioned you jackie
in the middle of my extra intros
you're there
in that second post ;)

tbh it's my aesthetic af but also super lame lmfao

YOOOOO SO prom is in like two weeks and im going to die lol

i will bring it up, and if i dont die then we shall see ..... but i may die so... shrug

       
paris                                                                                 francis

MAYBE THIS WAS DOOMED
F R O M    THE   S  T  A  R  T   
BUT  THAT   DOESNT  STOP
MY                             HEART
FROM    SKIPPING   A   BEAT
E   V   E    R    Y   T   I   M   E
I                 SEE               YOU

i am so infatuated with you i don't even know what to do with myself. i used to go to bed early because sleep was so important to me, now i drag myself into the late hours of the night in hopes of getting to hear your voice over the phone.

Oh ok sure
I have a bipolar psychotic mama who took my tablet and claimed to the athorities and administrators at my school that I was sending and recieveing nudes. For some reason they think that I was logged onto the tablet for a week but get this, the tablets not even mine, it's my friends. Ohhh and if that's not enough, my mama.acted as if she actually cared for me.. REALLY! FUCKING REaLLy?! The same parent who beat me repeatedly with a frying pan and when she got to tired to swing it, she stumped on my whole body!!! The same person?! Are you fucking serious!?! So they pull me out of class and tell me. The say they saw the so called messages I've been sending and they were upset. Well first things first, idgaf becuase they only listen to her!!! Not all parents tell the truth. They are full of lies just like everyone else because we all are human. They fucked up my day. I'm just done rn
Committing suicide

Jade wrote: "Oh ok sure
I have a bipolar psychotic mama who took my tablet and claimed to the athorities and administrators at my school that I was sending and recieveing nudes. For some reason they think that ..."

No please Jade. I promise, we can all help you. Please, We can't lose you.. Please. Don't..

Please jade.. We love you

And I love you guys too but it's just too much

I know Jade.. Just hang on. Things will get better. We love you so much and we can't lose you. *hugs*

honestly do it, it's fun <3

CURRENT: why the fuck is picking a face claim so hard

       

       
- bambi

LMFAO I WAS IN MY FEELINGS THIS MORNING
then i went to work and had a great time
now i'm home, my eyes hurt , music is playing and i'm gonna be studying
good shit

J Cole has this song called Love Yourz and i've been listening to it a lot lately and i just want to make a pretty scream poem/lyric poem of it....
i think i will tbh

       

       
- j cole - bambi

thanks so much <3

vanity flowers....

       

       
- bambi

       

       
- bambi

LOVE YOURZ
NO SUCH THING AS A LIFE BETTER THAN YOURZ

and in other news, prom is in five days. i need to start the bodily preparations on tuesday, i am not excited and will complain until i take cute photos on friday

ITS TUESDAY
and because i slacked on face washing my skin has proceeded to break out and look terrible today, i am sad but thankful that my skin has chosen today to make my complexion look like the human form of trash

ok but why is the holocaust the most fascinating thing to me???? i feel morbid af but i could literally talk about it for 72 hours and still ask for more???

i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics i love ap statistics

life is great

ive been hit with the sudden realization that's i have never had a colored teacher
i am disappointed

literally on the phone with an auto insurance agent and i kind of want to go back to second grade

i got my license yesterday and now i'm going to be financing a vehicle with my own name like FUCK ME i dont wanna grow up SOMEONE HELP

i have the face of a 12 year old what is happeningu

hey red, is it okay if i comment here?

yaaa of course
thank you so much for asking, i appreciate it a lot

omg the auto insurance dude was telling me i'm going to have to be paying like 500 dollars a month for car insurance.... what is life ahaha

no problem, i didn't wanna just jump in here without asking lol

ʀᴇᴅ wrote: "omg the auto insurance dude was telling me i'm going to have to be paying like 500 dollars a month for car insurance.... what is life ahaha"

ahaha welcome to life ;)

WAIT NO EVEN LESS CAUSE ONLY TOOK OUT ONE WEEKS WORTH OF FOOD SPENDING.

lol i'm still going to be happily living my life idk what i'm buggin about

ʀᴇᴅ wrote: "no omg growing up is such a trap, i literally saw it coming like i remember being in first grade and this girl was like "i can't wait to grow up" and i literally stopped being her friend because i ..."

woah a lot of math >.<

i love math with all my heart even if right now it's making me sad

ʀᴇᴅ wrote: "i love math with all my heart even if right now it's making me sad"

haha i love math too lol

JACKIE I DONT EVEN KNOW
actually i'm worrying about the future, or i was
now i'm fine and i'm template developing

blue wrote: "ʀᴇᴅ wrote: "i love math with all my heart even if right now it's making me sad"

haha i love math too lol"

Just randomly coming in to say I AM IN MATH RN AND I WANT TO DIE

math is so heart eyes omg what math are you learning??? geometry, pre calc, algebra??

ʀᴇᴅ wrote: "math is so heart eyes omg what math are you learning??? geometry, pre calc, algebra??"

Algebra and geomtry

lol geometry sucked ASS i'll give you that, freshman year was not easy because of that, but algebra is so easy omg i literally taught myself algebra 2

Lol. Im in 10th rn

ew sophmore
lmao jk i'm just a junior

hi so i just finished watching 13 reasons why and