Anti Bullying Week Readathon discussion

I know that many of us in this group have been bullied, some during childhood and some as adults. I'd like to make this page a place to share our own experiences, and maybe offer advice to people who might be going through the same thing.

If you don't feel comfortable sharing your story that's perfectly fine, you can still offer support and advice to others :)

Remember, bullying doesn't have to be violent. Emotional bullying can hurt just as much.

I'll share my own story soon, when I can spend time thinking what I want to say. For now I'd like to open it up to the group. Be brave. Talking is healing, and we're all here for the same reason <3

I am currently 32 and was bullied at school when I was 13 which involved standing up for a friend against the 'popular' girl which resulted ultimately in emotional bullying and then that friend turned her back on me when life became too hard. After a year I left the school after my parents noticed something was wrong and pushed me to talk about it and I moved to anther school where I had an amazing last few years of school.
As an adult only five years ago I worked in the media and had a boss who was very controlling and liked to torment me. As an adult I had plenty of experience to treat it differently and when I became withdrawn and emotional I realised it was time to leave and move on. The main advice I would give is to talk to people and if you can leave the situation that is making you unhappy do. If your in school talk to a parent or teacher or organisation if you want to talk to a stranger. Telling someone you trust really helps and it's amazing how many people have struggled with bullying and once you share your problem that's half the battle you never have to be alone

I don't know if this counts as bully but I wanted to share it:

I haven never been the one to stand and do not do anything if something unfair happens with me. I believe that everyone one of us has been bullied or teased in one way or another in high school and I was and still am no different.

I remember that I changed my school previous year because of our residency and I was the only new student in my class and no friends. Obviously I was kinda self conscious and after a few days at the school, I was being picked at in the class by the 'famous' students of my class. They teased me, criticized me and made me feel a lot troubled and disturbed. One of them created a huge fuss over a seat and then saying one thing or another as she is passing.

I was greatly disturbed about it for the first few days but then I couldn't take it anymore and whenever they teased me, I would say something straight to their faces that would make them quiet and then eventually stopped teasing me. It still happens but quite rarely because they avoid picking on me now. I have been in the same school for like a year and got to know that no one stood against them when they tried anything unfair, took everything from other students (roles in competitions, their chance to show their talent) until I came along.

This not only happened in the current school but in the previous school when I was in grade seven or eight.

I can imagine the trouble all high school bullied people and others might have been going through. Therefore, I want you to feel strong, be strong for yourself because I have seen people who got bullied and how they ended up, they had a lot of anger, pain and untold things hidden in them and it killed them inside.

If this is happening with you then write it down, tell it to someone, do something but don't just sit quiet, keeping it all to yourself.

I do not want to see this happen to anyone and therefore wish that this Official event help everyone in the world understand the bad effects about bullying and help both the bullies and the people getting bullied. :)

I have experienced a different kind of bullying. When I was twelve years old, my parents got divorced. My mom was depressed about it for a while, and she got married again pretty quickly, as a result of her depression. I was never really comfortable with her new husband, but it wasn't like he was mean back then. After about a month, he started treating my badly. He would yell at me in front of my friends if we were "laughing too loudly", he would call me names, he would yell at me if I took too long showers, basically, he would yell at me for the smallest things that disturbed him. I started noticing him trying to push me out, for example, if he cooked, he wouldn't count on me, and if he brought food home from the supermarket, he would just skip me. I became nothing. I told my mom several times and she ignored it. One night, he kicked me out of the house, and I went to my father's place. His wife didn't want me there either, so I had to go back to my mom. Her husband lived here for a few years, and I remember how depressed I was. I would only leave my room when I had to use the bathroom, I would never sit and have dinner with them or anything like that. I was at my room at all times. This was just extra difficult to deal with since I didn't really know who to talk to. I didn't trust my teachers enough to tell them, and they never asked. I couldn't talk about it to my parents because they thought I was making a big deal about it. I don't know.
Now, I'm 18 years old, my mom has gotten a divorce, but the old habit of me staying in my room is still there.
I just want to say that please, if anybody, has experienced the same as I have, or any kind of bullying, talk to someone. If there is no one in your surroundings that you can trust, talk to someone online. Just talk. And maybe more importantly, if you feel that anyone in your surroundings is having a difficult time but isn't talking about... Just ask :)

I'm 31 and I was bullied most of my school life and then as an adult. I was starting year 7 and there was this one girl who would verbally bully me, I remember I told on her about what she was doing and she turned everyone against me. We then moved house an I changed schools, starting in year 8 I was builled d by a girl who was the head of the group and then a single girl. The group leader would say nasty stuff about me and my mum and one day took my PE kit and hid it. The other girl would push me into the lavander brush, antagonise me in class, tell me I cant be in her form room and drag me out by my bag. I would skip school and had feelings of wanting to end life.

When I was working as a nursery nurse couple years ago my then boss was bullying me. Saying I wasn't capable to do certain things, maybe working in the baby room was too much for my head to handle and ever giving me the chance to prove my capabilities. Shouting at me in front of staff and children, wrongly paying me and when I finally left saying 'I hope what happened here doesn't happen there'

Hey, I'm 17 and I was actually bullied when I was in 6th grade. I was 'dating' this long-time friend of mine and his friends weren't really the nicest of people. His friends would start making up rumors about him and I and they would try to spread it around the school that I was a slut and a whore. They would walk up to me and call me slut and whore and any other terrible name you could think of. It really got to me and I even started to think that maybe I was everything that they were calling me. I started becoming super self-concious and I started to hate myself everytime I looked in the mirror and it got harder and harder to get out of the bed in the morning. It started to get really bad, but one day I decided I had had enough of the mental abuse and I stood up for myself. It started to die down and eventually I moved and went to another school where I had a much better time and made real friends. My advice is just to ignore what others say because it's all irrelevent and they just want to make you as miserable as they are. Just keep your head held high because it won't matter in the long run.

I am 14 years old and I am really short, apparently that makes me a freak or something because my classmates, my father and my sister always made fun of me; it was either my size or my cheeks but it I always was something to laugh about. These laughters continued for years until three years ago my mom, my sister and I practically ran out of my father’s house to live for our own. Two years ago, my classmates simply stop bothering me for some reason. I never defended myself, I never did something about, I pretended it wasn´t hurting me even though it did and I never told anyone I was hurt.
This and many other things I tried to ignore and keep inside exploded a year ago. Now I have depression and I am trying to get better each day and accept my reality: I AM SHORT, BUT I AM NOT SMALL.
For any other person that is suffering in any way: the answer is not to ignore, the answer is to answer and defend yourself, because even if the situation is hard to solve if you try to defend yourself instead of doing nothing you will feel stronger. Remember you are never alone and that in these situations a perfect stranger can be the perfect help. Never lose hope, for now it may seem like forever but in the future it will just be a part of your life that made you stronger.

Fabe wrote: "I am 14 years old and I am really short, apparently that makes me a freak or something because my classmates, my father and my sister always made fun of me; it was either my size or my cheeks but i..."

I totally know how you feel, I'm 5' tall and a lot of my bullying was aimed at that too. It's taken me a long time to accept myself as I am, and realise it wasn't me who had the problem. x

I guess it's time for me to share my own story. You guys have been so brave sharing your experiences and showing how strong you've become. This is probably going to be a long one, sorry...

I was, in some form or another, bullied for the entirety of my school life. In primary school there was a girl, a big strong girl, who made people's lives a misery. It's like she'd give us all turns, moving from one to another, excluding us one by one then welcoming us back like nothing had happened when she moved on to the next person. She made fun of me because I was a lot shorter than the rest of my class. Because I had a flat chest at 10 (she was a very early bloomer!) and because I was very shy and introverted (aka 'weird'). Despite this I thought of her as one of my friend group.

This group basically hung out together at school right through to GCSEs at 16. And one by one we'd be left out of the group and made to feel isolated. I have to admit that I went along with this when it was someone else's 'turn' because most of my schooldays were spent trying not to draw attention to myself and make it 'my turn' already. That made me a part of the problem, I know. Hindsight and all that. Then one day around the time of our exams we all got together, without this girl, and actually spoke about what was happening. We realised she'd done something to a mutual friend of ours that NONE of us could excuse, and we all shut her out. It took all of us together to stand up to her and just say no. She actually left school soon after, without finishing her exams. It's like the power just drained out of her that day and she quite literally disappeared.

It wasn't just her though. At 11, starting secondary school, I developed depression. Nobody would acknowledge it as depression because I was 11 and 'what did I have to be depressed about' right? I had constant tears in my eyes, would break down at the slightest thing, and retreated into myself barely talking throughout the day. I think I actually freaked out my 'friends' over those months, because they always looked at me strangely, and obviously didn't want me around. From then on if there wasn't enough room for us all at a table, I'd be the one left out without even a second thought. In every class and at lunch. One day we went on a school trip and my mum gave us all a lift to the train station, but on the return trip my 'friends' and their ride left me at the station. I still thought of them as friends, but they weren't. They used me for car rides and to help with their schoolwork. I didn't want to think about that, because I just didn't want to be on my own all the time.

There were others. Bigger kids called me 'adorable' and 'cute' (among other things relating to height that weren't so nice). But even those 'nice' words upset me because I didn't want to be singled out. There was a teacher called Mrs. Little and kids joked in the hallways that she was my mum. People literally picked me up and moved me out of the way in the hallways. They screamed at me for being useless in sports lessons (even the teacher accused me of being rubbish on purpose). I'd find sweet wrappers in the hood of my coat after a walk down a hallway. Every time I heard a group of kids laughing I was convinced they were laughing at me. One boy actually spat all over me one day after school, and the head of year tried to brush the 'incident' off as my mum overreacting, until she threatened to go to the papers. They eventually suspended him for a week.

When I got to 6th form at age 17 everything changed. My body finally changed, and my classes were full of people who actually WANTED to be there (in the UK we can leave school at 16 and go to college or stay on for 6th form). I made a group of real friends, had my first boyfriend, was invited to parties and generally caught up with everything I'd missed out on over the years - when I'd rather hide in the corner than be noticed. My confidence grew and I felt genuinely happy for the first time in forever. Plus I was called in to mentor new kids who were having the same 'problem' as me when they started school (they still wouldn't call it depression).

I still don't think I really accepted myself and all my flaws until very recently though. I think that's something that comes with age too. I still have weak days where a hater comment on a video can hurt me, but mostly I don't care because I'm happy with someone who loves me, and those people don't even factor into my life. All that stuff from school feels like a LIFETIME ago. Like it happened to someone else, because it really doesn't matter to me any more.

My advice to anyone going through hard times like this is to talk to someone who'll listen, because they can give you a perspective you've never even considered before. There's help out there, whether you need intervention to remove you from the situation or just advice on how to remove yourself. But remember that one day those people WON'T MATTER to you, and what they think of you will mean nothing. Once you find that confidence within yourself it will show to the world, and you'll never look back xx

Thank you Sarah for sharing it sounds like you had a terrible experience at school but I'm so happy to hear you are feeling stronger now. Your videos are some of my favourites and I think your genuineness shows through. I'm sorry that people feel the need to hurt you through irrelevant comments but your channel subscribers think your amazing so your right to let bad things wash over you because your great x

Elena wrote: "Thank you Sarah for sharing it sounds like you had a terrible experience at school but I'm so happy to hear you are feeling stronger now. Your videos are some of my favourites and I think your genu..."

Thank you Elena, the support of subscribers like you is definitely a factor in my growing confidence :) xx

I've only just seen this feed but I really wanted to share my experience as well, because I know that people doing this helps others.

I'm 16 next month, and apart from the last 2 years, I can't remember a time when I wasn't being bullied. Due to genetic reasons (my mum and dad, and a lot of family) I'm overweight and always have been, and it is something out of my control - and being overweight has led to me being bullied since I was 6.

It started with a girl who just hated me, and on and off she bullied me for 3 years until for other reasons I had to move schools. Then Year 5 I moved to a school where everyone already had friends and me being quiet meant that I had a lot of difficulty. Throughout the entire 2 years I was constantly bullied for being overweight and never made friends so was happy to move to high school.

That didn't make any difference though. I had formed a single friend from Guides in Y7 and we happened to be going to the same high school. She kept nagging me to tell her a boy I fancied - we were Year 7! Of course I didn't fancy anyone - so she thought it was her duty to spread it around the year that I was a Lesbian. I don't have a problem with anyone who's gay, but I'm not myself and so the fact that people screamed this across roads and wouldn't sit near me hurt. On top of the fact that I'm quiet, like books and studious made me even more of a bullying target.

So I went through the first 3 years of high school lonely, occasionally making friends who turned out to be horribly mean. Eventually, combined with other things - I decided to move schools and haven't been bullied since - well, until now where I'm in a situation where I'm not sure if my friends actually like me anymore -they ignore me a lot and push me away - so once again I'm isolated. I've been left with Anxiety and Depression and find it difficult to get through each day because of the fact that I've been left with these mental scars. I'm at a better school but I can't appreciate it because my mind subconciously reverts back to the time when I was at my old school.

I'm so, so unhappy and although next year I go to Sixth Form College it feels so long away. You can tell me all you want it'll go quickkly - it really isn't.

I know that one day after University, I just need to move away and start again, find love and real friends because right now I'm in a miserable situation.

Aso many of us have gone through it and it's beautiful that we can all come together and speak about it. Would like you to hear my story I will try and make it quick for you. I never experienced physical bullying but when I was at school I always got called gay and it really frustrated me and was quite embarrassing for a 15 year old kid who doesn't know who he is. I went through a lot when I came out and lost a lot of really 'close' friends but I also gained a lot of friends and got a lot closer to people I already knew, But f**k you haters I embrace being gay cause since I've come out I'm met so many amazing people and got close with a lot of people. So if anyone out there is struggling then just know it really does get better but not straight away it take time but trust me it's does!

I'm 20 now but when I was in high school I got bullied a bit. I got bullied forhaving glasses and for something else that has to do with my family. But iI luckily had a close group of friends that helped me. I was lucky enoughto only be bullied for a little while, I know a lot of people get bullied for a long long time. Now I don't care what people think I am who I am and look how I look and thats how I live my life.

Sending my love and hugs to everyone who posted. You have all been so brave to share your story so I'll share mine too..

I'm 22 now but when I was around 14, I was pretty much bullied a lot. This guy I was seeing pretty much sent his female friends after me when things went wrong in the relationship and he'd constantly share the details of our relationship with them. They were relentless, they even followed me around school and waited until I could be alone. Heck, they even told me they were going to do it. They constantly texted, called, waited, just constantly harassing me. So I went around with some friends, reported it to teachers and got counselling but it never really helped much. One of the girls' little sister befriended my group of friends (which made me terribly uncomfortable), and later my group of friends stopped helping me when I needed them the most. Eventually we drifted apart.

Later at 17 a kid in my class saw me eating a hamburger and saying that someone as ugly as me shouldn't be eating an oily hamburger because its only going to make me uglier. He then told all his friends how ugly I was and they simply laughed agreeing. A classmate told me that he went round telling people in our class about how ugly I was. By some terrible stroke of luck, I had to be in the same group project as them but they refused to let me know the details (I was sick the day it was announced/assigned, so I wasn't in school) and one of the guys ended up yelling at me, calling me names then taunting me to do everything on my own since I "wanted to help so much". Apparently wanting to help out isn't a thing that people do...

I don't think I've fully recovered from that. I find it hard to trust people, fearful that they'd send people after me to attack me, or even just leave me completely alone. I still feel insecure about my looks and over the years I've become more obsessed with trying to make myself "prettier" or "more beautiful" but I still feel really "ugly" and insecure, especially after eating.

I'm grateful to have met someone special two years ago who makes me feel safe and comfortable in my skin and I'm trying my best to open up more and not be afraid to be myself. Its been a struggle, but I'm sure I'll get there. I'm learning how to love myself and that's my advice to you. Love yourself.

I've only just seen all of these coments and read through them. I am torn between being devastated that this has happened to all of you, and also so inspired by all of you for getting through and sharing these experiences with others.

I guess I should maybe share too.

I was bullied drom the start of school. I think I had maybe 2 years of shool at the absolute most where I wasn't bullied, and then it started. I have no idea why. I was excluded. I was verbally tormented. I was physically bullied in primary school. it got to the point where I had to change schools...and it just carried on in a different place. It's like I attracted these people to me, I like I had a sign above me that invited them to make my life hell.

Secondary school started and, from this point in it was verbal/non physical bullying, but that was just as awful. I was bullied because I was quiet, because I had red hair, because I had no friends. I was bullied because I liked reading. Every single day. I don't think I had any friends until the last year of school.

Started college and then...it started again. I was again bullied for having red hair, for being different, for the way I dressed. I was called Satan and The Devil. I think this had to do with my spiritual beleifs, but, really, I don't even know. All I know is, it destroyed the last bit of y confidence. I was studying drama at the time and I lost all confidence in my ability to perform. I ended up swapping courses after the first year of university, due to, amongst other things, still being excluded and bullied there too.

This was made worse by he fact I was being bullied at home too, by my brother. What he did to me went far beyond 'sibling rivalry' or just fighting that regular brothers and sisters go through. he'd hit me, kick me, push me from chairs. I still have scars on my head from where he hit me over the head with a broom. There was also, at one early stage, a sexual element to this abuse.

I don't know what it is about me. I mean, I wish I knew what I was doing that is so wrong. At every stage of school i was told that 'people will have grown up this year' and then at colege and uni, 'People aftually want to be here. They'll be so much more mature!' and it never happened. I now have clinical depression and high anxiety. I think one of the biggest problems all this has caused is: I have absolutely jo idea how to interact with people as friends. I just don't know how.

I graduated last year and I am pleased to say I do now have some friends, some from uni, some from online, and some now also from my job. It's stil incredibly hard. I have not had friends for more than a couple of years, so at every stage I am expecting them to turn on me, or abandon me, or forget about me.

I'm sorry this is such a long post. I dont expect anyone to read it all, but I just had to get all of this out there, if for no other reason than some days I feel like it is still eating me alive.

I understand, mine happened at 2 different schools and as an adult and I often wondered why me what am I doing to deserve this. When I was at school I tried to get help from them but it just continued, I had school counselling instead of the bully getting the help.

It certainly knocked my confidence which I didn't have much of before, but being Bullied made it worse. The bully should get help to see why they are doing it and if they understand the implications on the victim. School need a bullying system where the victim can go for help and it's felt with straight away. Instead like my bully suspended from school 2days before summer break.

I'm so glad for one thing when I was bullied that we didn't have mobile phones or facebook back then. So no cyber bullying happened. I think bullying today is not harder but easier cos of Internet and the whole social media sites, cos someone can bully you from the comfort of there home too. I know ppl say just get off the internet, but you want to see what they are saying to check and why should you have to give up social media. I watched a mini film about cyber bully on Netflix, so moving
At least when I got home it stopped and I didn't see it all over the Internet.

I am now 21 years old and when i was in school i was bullied about my weight (i was uk size 10/12) which is not big its the most common size for women.
But i was bullied every day with mainly verbal abuse but on occasion a particular boy took to slapping my bum and saying loudly look at it wobble..
I became obsessed with my weight and unhappy..
i started to suffer from anorexia getting down to 6st 5pds and hospitalized was generally scared to put weight back on. thankfully ive overcome that and at weight i am happy about. i was bullied for exzcma and for being different liking different music (rock, punk ect) reading all the time "i was a nerd"
Dont have a lot of advice but remember if your bullied for being different that's what makes you special and unique and incredibly awesome.
Or if its appearance wise weight clothes ect.. remember what ever you weigh its is not important its how you feel that matters you are beautiful big, small, in between. And take it from me sometimes being a small size is so much worse than having some meat on your bones i know so many people who were unhappy being skinny the world is unfair and you cant please every one so worry about what you think about your self, what other people think about you not important.

Holly wrote: "I've only just seen this feed but I really wanted to share my experience as well, because I know that people doing this helps others.

I'm 16 next month, and apart from the last 2 years, I can't re..."
Hi i had a similar experience i know so many people say this but it does get better i promise i was bullied for my weight and trust me its not important and looking different in the real world it does not matter it makes you different and who wants to be like every body else. i obsessed over what my bullies said to me and tried to change who i was to a point i became ill and wasn't happy at all. School is the hardest years of your life keep your head up and good luck in 6th form you seem like a smart girl one day it will just be a bad memory and will make you stronger in the long run. it hurts now surround your self with family, friends and of course good books :)

I don't know if I'm the only one but I still hate my bullies even after 15 years. I may be a bad person to wishing them the worst in life but I just can’t help it. My friends tell me to just leave behind what happened and move on, but I can’t, it’s not that easy. Sometimes I wonder if I hadn’t been bullied what my life would look like. I was shy, with low self-esteem and I never stood up for myself and that became even worse after the bullying. Now when I see the people that bullied me on fb getting married and what not, all I can think about is how these people ruined someone else’s life and they get to live this happy life and probably don’t even remember what they did. I know people change, but for me these people will always have a rotten soul.

Andreja wrote: "I don't know if I'm the only one but I still hate my bullies even after 15 years. I may be a bad person to wishing them the worst in life but I just can’t help it. My friends tell me to just leave ..."

Believe me, I am not judging you for thinking this. I totally understand. But try to think about the positive parts in your life. Instead of thinking "I got bullied" try to think "I got through bullying but I am still alive". Your life is worth soooo much more than you sticking to that stage in your life. You're a beautiful person, try making your life positive. I know it is difficult, I understand that. But don't forget that you are worth more than this, sweetie.

Andreja wrote: "I don't know if I'm the only one but I still hate my bullies even after 15 years. I may be a bad person to wishing them the worst in life but I just can’t help it. My friends tell me to just leave ..."

Aya is totally right, they have no power over you and don't need to be a part of your life any more. There's this quote that comes to mind "You can't start the next chapter when you're rereading the last". They may have made you unhappy back then, but now you're doing it to yourself by not letting go. I know it's hard, honestly I do. But you're in control of you, and only you can make that decision to move on. Once you decide to take that power away from them it's like a massive weight is lifted, I promise.

As for what you're seeing on Facebook - people only share the image of themselves that they want people to see. Don't take it at face value, I know mean kids from school whose lives seem perfect on Facebook, but believe me they're not. Those people are used to playing a part and creating an image to stay at the top of the pack, it's just changed from 'bully' to 'happy grown up'.

Holly wrote: "I've only just seen this feed but I really wanted to share my experience as well, because I know that people doing this helps others.

I'm 16 next month, and apart from the last 2 years, I can't re..."

I'm so sorry you're still experiencing things like this. I totally understand the 'friends' not really being your friend thing. I also understand that advice is easy to give, but not so easy to put in to practice. All I can say, as someone who has experienced similar things and can look back on it differently, is that you should try to find a new friend or group of friends to hang out with if you can. Is there a group or some after school activities you can join, where you can surround yourself with new people? I know making new friends and meeting new people is hard for some of us, I used to have anxiety about situations like that too, but I found that giving myself little goals like joining a group or talking to one person helped. I used to go into my shell and barely speak at school to try to protect myself, but in reality all I did was alienate everyone and make myself seem 'weird' to new people. I know it's a cycle, because you're scared, but you also have to put yourself out there to be able to grow and gain more confidence. It's so hard, I know. But removing yourself from those situations (like friends who aren't acting like friends) is a brave and positive thing that gives you back some of the power.

Aya and Sarah thank you for the kind words.
I like the quote "You can't start the next chapter when you're rereading the last", because this is exactly how I feel. If I don’t leave these things behind I will never be able to move on.

Sarah wrote: "Holly wrote: "I've only just seen this feed but I really wanted to share my experience as well, because I know that people doing this helps others.

I'm 16 next month, and apart from the last 2 yea..."

Thank you for what you said. I really appreciate it. It's difficult because in June I'll be leaving school for college and so a new start will give me the opportunity to make new friends. As I joined my school in year 9 - everybody had already formed friendship groups and so I latched onto the one that I have now - it's difficult to break into another friendship group, especially due to suffering with anxiety as well.
I'll try my best :)

i can understand fully how that is would be difficult for you, but sometimes all you need is one person you can talk too.
That must make things really difficult with anxiety, you seem like a fabulous person so its their loss at end of the day
good glad to hear you will

Before I was bullied, I attended a different school. However, we had to switch schools due to a family issue. I then went to attend another school in the same town.

I was bullied in primary school at the age of 7. Just because of the fact I turned that boy down in kindergarten. Come on, baby romance? I wasn't interessed in boys or love back the, but more interessed in my hobbies. It occured to him that I had to get punished for turning me down and from grade 3 to halfway grade 4(Dutch school) he made my life a living hell. I've been physically and mentally abused by him and his friends. Got back home with bruises and a broken mind every single day. My school did nothing, our principal tought we were just not getting along although my mother had told him about the abuse. After those visits it became worse. Until my mother was tired to see me return home with bruises and tears running down my cheecks every single day. Halfway grade 4 I switched schools(again)back to the school I came from(see the irony in this?). I tried to pick up pieces for a long time, but I was too de-attached from my old classmates to fill the gap.

I was quite alone until I went to high school. Got bullied there a bit as well, but it wasn't as bad as those years before. The worst year I had in high school was when I was in my 2nd year and an old friend of that bully became a new classmate. For a period, I had bad luck again until he dropped out(thank god).

Even nowadays, it's hard to trust people. Even at work. People are willing to stab anyone in the back to get what they want. It's like primary school never left me alone.

I got a close circle of friends though and love them to death. With some of them, I don't have daily contact ... but we all know that if someone is in need they'd pick up their phone in the middle of the night.

Jeanine wrote: "Before I was bullied, I attended a different school. However, we had to switch schools due to a family issue. I then went to attend another school in the same town.

I was bullied in primary school..."

I'm so glad to hear that you have a close circle of friends, I don't really have that but I wish I did. It's horrible to hear stories about schools not being supportive, I like to think they're better at it now as it's a more talked about issue, but I know it still happens. Bullying can have a lifelong effect, I think it takes certain people coming into your life to help you see things (and yourself) differently. Since I met my husband I'm like a different person, going out there and doing things I never thought I'd be able to do, and I'm finally at a stage where I can walk away from poisonous people without letting it hurt me. Surround yourself with beautiful people (I'm talking inside here) and it will start to fade xx

I also get a lot of support of my fiance. and he knows how talking about it or thinking back makes me very emotional. I can't get through a conversation without a single tear.

I also did a special defensibility course thanks to my mom. Tthis really helped me out.

Sad story is that the high school at which I had the best time ever, my younger brother got bullied at and dropped out in his first year ... which left my parents with no other choice than to put him in special education as no school wanted to have him. He was bullied for having autism and being different from others ... however he fought back. One time he was physically abused in the bus back home by classmates. The same night they went to the police to report the incident. My mom got him out not long after that, as the school couldn't garantee both his an his bullies safety(as he fought back). The cowards, they did nothing against bullying when I was in high school(I've seen it mostly with other people, even a few of my friends because they were wearing gothic clothing. school said they provoced the bullying themselves and if they wanted it to change then they should wear "normal clothing") and it went worse after. Schools should do more to prevent bullies to destroy people's lives, their self esteem.

Best thing I heard from my mom a while back: the guy that bullied me lost a lot. If I heard the story well he dropped out of school, became a junk and got kicked out. Karma is a bitch and I'm glad he felt some of it. He has his life on track again, but the thing that bothered me the most about him: he never apologized once. 1 apology would've helped me to leave the past behind me just a bit more. It wouldn't make the mistakes he made better, but it would've softened the pain I've beared ever since a bit more. Just a bit more.

The majority of my childhood was governed by bullies. I always remember being teased for wanting to focus on school or reading but I suppose it began to be serious at the age of around 7. I remember asking the teacher to stay alone in the classroom at lunch because I didn't want to go outside when it first began. As part of a small school group, I was isolated and alone. I was always an independent little girl so as it went on I didn't mind spending lunch on my own, even if people did see me.

It started to get a bit more serious when I was around 10. It developed from being emotional to also being physical. I would cry every night, contemplate self harm and refuse to go to school (which was the worst things for a girl who loved learning). Two events stuck out for me during this stage. Firstly, was when we had a school election for Head Girl. I was elected by younger years and staff to be the head girl for my school, beating the girls in question. As a result, a public 'pact' was made between everyone in my class and the class below which resulted in not a single word being said to me for a solid month. They had a club name, motto and logo for this. A few weeks later, the girls decided to 'make it up to me' and I had a birthday sleepover in celebration. Come midnight, my Mum was ringing the girls parents to pick them up as she heard through the walls the disgusting comments made in my own home. I think she never quite grasped how serious it was until then.

There were only two main secondary schools in my area and I was forced to attend one a 40 min bus drive away to avoid the primary school bullies. This school was no easier. Everyone knew each other from their old school and had no room for me in their existing friendship groups. I had zero self confidence and self worth.

After a few years of more teasing, comments and loneliness which seemed to merge into one, I began to care less about what people thought. If someone wanted to mess with my head, I would just walk away. To my shock, this landed me in trouble with teachers for being 'rude'.

Now at the age of 17, I can honestly say I cannot name one person I would call a true friend. Even at this age, I hear comments about my work ethic on a weekly basis but chose to ignore their ignorance. The loneliness and hurt has made me stronger and more focused on what I want in life.

I WOULD NEVER WANT ANYONE TO EXPERIENCE WHAT I WENT THROUGH, EVEN THOSE WHO INFLICTED IT UPON ME. THIS IS NOT MY WHOLE STORY AS I ASSUME IT IS NOT YOURS. THE FULL STORY CONTAINS ENDLESS TEARS, AGONISING DEPRESSION AND HUGE AMOUNTS OF ANGER. BULLYING IS DISGUSTING AND NOT APPRECIATED ENOUGH. ITS IS UP TO THE SURVIVORS TO PASS ON OUR STORY AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE. ONLY WE CAN UNDERSTAND THE TRUE HORROR.

At the end of the day almost everyone has experienced bullying the only advice is to rather tell someone.

Hi :) I'm Martha, and to a normal person, I may look like a normal almost teenager, but really, deep down, I am a bully victim, and someone who is self-conscious and has lost most of her self confidence.

Compared to others, my bullying story may seem like nothing, but I still want to share it. It starts mainly with my school story. I was homeschooled up until third grade, but since I did kindergarten and first grade in the same year I was a grade ahead of my age. In my neighborhood there were two girls, and one of them was nice the other mean. Typical. The mean girl really wasn't that bad, just ignoring me and being obnoxious with the occasional mean name calling. I was 7 at the time, and really wanted a life outside of my homeschool group, so my parents sent me to a Private school where I completed 4th grade. I was the youngest in my class, being 8 years old, and that alone made me a target. It didn't help that there were 11 year olds in the same class for some reason. There was another boy, who was mentally disturbed, and they bullied him a lot. I stood up to him, and we quickly became friends. Because of that, he and I were the victims of bullying for majority of that year. This one girl, she made the whole class go against us, ultimately making us friendless. They would tease me relentlessly every chance they got. I eventually told my mom after two months, and the school eventually got it to stop, but she and I still had our occasional fights.
After that year I transferred to Public school where I repeated fourth grade so that I was the normal age for my grade. That year wasn't so bad, but then we moved in the middle of it and I had to change schools in the middle of the year. And let me tell you, being the new girl in fourth grade sucks. I came to the school and everyone was nice at first, but after a week I saw the real sort of things. There was this one girl who everyone ignored, and so I became friends with her ( I was soft hearted back then) They didn't exactly bully me, instead they just ignored me and eventually the whole class just turned against me. Then that girl who I was 'friends' with, decided she didn't like me and so I was left friendless. And it didn't help that a boy on the bus always bullied me, and got me in trouble for things I didn't do. Then I found out at the end of that year that my mom had cancer and she was pregnant, which meant I had a brother/sister who was probably going to die and my mom might too. I tried to tell on the bullies, but it seemed like none of the teachers cared. They just talked to the boy, and then that was it. Over and over.
At the end of that year I was a mess. I had about one friend, a mom who had cancer, and I was emotionally unstable. I switched schools agin in 5th grade, and was hoping for a fresh start. The beginning of the year went really well. I was friends with most of the class, my teacher was nice, and I was enjoying school. Then I started getting really good grades, and everyone started getting jealous. The mildest bullying was right under the teachers nose, and people always called me " Mrs.Washington" And had me help them with their schoolwork, and when I wouldn't give them the answers, they would end of hating me. This one girl, pretended to be my best friend for half the year, and then after Christmas break, she backstabbed me. She told rumors about me, and eventually the whole class just plain out hated me. She insulted me, and told me I didn't deserve friends. One girl stood up for me once, but other than that everyone was just a by stander. The teachers never did anything, and so i was just left to the bullying. My self confidence was shattered that year. Even after my mom got out of remission, she wasn't the same and criticised me on everything. I fell into depression for about 3 months, where I finally found some true friends and got out of it. But still, I find myself never fully confident of anything I do, and I sometimes find myself believing what the bullies said. Bullying doesn't stop just when the actual act stops, it continues on throught he victims mind.
My tip is to truly find your friends. Who do you trust with your life? Who do you look up to, and want to be like? Those are your friends. If someone starts to bully you, tell someone before it actually gets serious.

Thank you to anyone who read that :) You guys are awesome, and I hope you all know that.

I'm 19 and I was bullied during my entire high school time. All I have to say is: it DOES get better! I'm now in college and I can finally say I made friends!!!!!! Please, never give up, ever. You are an amazing human being and everyone that says the opposit is just trying to get into your head. You are the only one with the capacity of being yourself, so DO IT!!

I am 40 and I was bullied by two different people at the same time. Here is my story: https://youtu.be/ihgf5XkFj_E

Throughout the duration of a lifetime we might forget many things including a bad marriage or other adverse events, however the one thing that will stay forever itched in our minds is being bullied. Depending on the severity and duration bullying can result in lifelong consequences as it changes the neural network in the brain. The way we perceive stimuli throughout life can be altered without proper treatment and guidance. This particular issue is one I haven't any answers nor the wisdom to mitigate this daily atrocity. However I'm glad there are those like Sarah who have an in depth knowledge of this insidious behavior that has dramatized so many. God's Peace Sarah! Bobby

Hi - I recently joined this group and am reading a few books that have bullying in them for the week - I'll be doing a video on those books - but I just wanted to share the link to the video I made about my bullying story - I hope you watch and enjoy!! Take care all and remember to love yourself!! :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhe9Y...