*WARNING* this review contains spoilers This review was posted by Ali L about the second book in the popular ACOTAR series. While I enjoyed most of this series, I found this review hilarious and wanted to share! (I also included an update she posted since I also found that funny)
“Feyre has safely returned from Under the Mountain and suffers no ill effects aside from nightmares, violent gastrointestinal distress, anemia, and losing the will to live. Her fiancé has turned into a massive dick because the Spring Court may have many positive attributes but it does not have comprehensive trauma counseling. At her wedding, Rhysand swoops in (literally ), takes her to his condo, and gets her Hooked on Phonics. We meet Cassian, who is serving Big Wing Energy, and Azriel, a spymaster who can't suss out that the woman he's been in love with for 500 years isn't into men. We discover that Rhys is really good at keeping secrets from Feyre, particularly when they pertain to her (better call in Az because that's some FORESHADOWING) and she eventually forgives him by heating up a can of Dinty Moore. They have sex in a vat of Bob Ross paint (happy little bushes indeed). The most important character in this book is the Suriel, a sassy soothsaying slayer in Voldemort robes. Lucien continues to be perfect. Tamlin is pissed. BookTok loses its collective mind.”
4/20/24 “Reread Update: I just feel like we don't talk about Rhys dreaming of a 16-year-old Feyre enough. I understand in the grand scheme of immortality it maybe doesn't seem like a big deal but it's still giving Creep.”
This review was posted by Ali L about the second book in the popular ACOTAR series. While I enjoyed most of this series, I found this review hilarious and wanted to share! (I also included an update she posted since I also found that funny)
“Feyre has safely returned from Under the Mountain and suffers no ill effects aside from nightmares, violent gastrointestinal distress, anemia, and losing the will to live. Her fiancé has turned into a massive dick because the Spring Court may have many positive attributes but it does not have comprehensive trauma counseling. At her wedding, Rhysand swoops in (literally ), takes her to his condo, and gets her Hooked on Phonics. We meet Cassian, who is serving Big Wing Energy, and Azriel, a spymaster who can't suss out that the woman he's been in love with for 500 years isn't into men. We discover that Rhys is really good at keeping secrets from Feyre, particularly when they pertain to her (better call in Az because that's some FORESHADOWING) and she eventually forgives him by heating up a can of Dinty Moore. They have sex in a vat of Bob Ross paint (happy little bushes indeed). The most important character in this book is the Suriel, a sassy soothsaying slayer in Voldemort robes. Lucien continues to be perfect.
Tamlin is pissed. BookTok loses its collective mind.”
4/20/24
“Reread Update: I just feel like we don't talk about Rhys dreaming of a 16-year-old Feyre enough. I understand in the grand scheme of immortality it maybe doesn't seem like a big deal but it's still giving Creep.”
Pure gold 😂