Born This Way discussion

No matter gay, straight or bi, lesbian transgender life, we all have to come out sometime.
I just don't know when hall be for me.

Next year?
In ten years?

I don't know. And it scares me.

you're not alone babe, NEVER forget that

It just doesn't always seem like that.
It scares me.
I need their approval.
And I know I'll just fuck everything up like I always seem to.

Coming out doesn't have to be a scary thing. You just have to relax, and when the time is right.. it will happen.

They'll disown me.
My dad still isn't speaking to my brother. He came out in December.

They won't. This happened to my friend. Parents have a vision for these kids this is a big thing.

But remember, we are always here for you.

Francois, you have no idea how much I relate to you. >_< I live in a country where being gay is like a very very very very rare disease. I've never in my life met someone else like me here.

I know. It makes it much better knowing this.

And my dad told my brother hat he "had a bad problem" he had to "get his life in line" and dump his boyfriend and find a wife.

What. The. Fuck.

I mean, I love my parents so, so much, but they don't understand.

No one really does unless it happened to them. I could get my friend to talk to you?

I don't think I'd ever plan on coming out. How am I supposed to come out when homosexuality in this country barely ever comes up in conversation? Where I live, it's like, if you're straight, then you're normal. If you're not, then you're an otherworldly being. I'm not even kidding.

I want to hug the both of you so much and promise everything is going to be fine..

~Skybabe~ ~Boss 9~ [psychic4] ~CHOCOHOLIC2~ wrote: "No one really does unless it happened to them. I could get my friend to talk to you?"

That would be stunning.

And Fauzy, I get it. Trust me. In South Africa being gay is like being some AIDS-ridden, Devil worshiping animal who wants nothing but sex.

Great well he's been through this too.

It would be nice to meet at least one human being in this country that's like me, though, you know? But sometimes I feel like I'm the only person here that's different. Like all the others are stereotyped and are pretty much the same.

Are his parents Christian?
Is he?

That'd make it easier.

I've never actually asked. ...

fαuzαn | wιld нearт ♥ wrote: "It would be nice to meet at least one human being in this country that's like me, though, you know? But sometimes I feel like I'm the only person here that's different. Like all the others are ster..."

Don't say that. Your special. You're unique.
If they follow the mould, they're fucked in the head.

And Ducky, don't worry, I was just curious.

Okay well I should go. Talk soon!

A bientot, Ducky!

Well, today I came out to one of my best friends. And her sister. And her mom.

Just remember, I'm like their adopted son and they are my adopted family.

So, it all started when I got there, I was freaking out, my head was spinning. So, TJ and I chatted about our gay siblings. And it kinda just came out after a long, strained minute.

She looked at me odd and asked "Are you serious?" to which I responded "Well... Yeah, I'm to the left of centre, I guess..."

She blinked and said okay, and accepted it and was nice about it. I then told her other sister Dannielle, we're both actors and are very open to each other.
She said it was cool and she never suspected it. So, they said I could talk to Anne, their (And my other) mom. Because she went through one of her daughters coming out.

So later on that day, we were alone and I was helping Anne with dinner. "Anne, you love me, right?" I asked softly. She smiled and said, "Of course" to which I replied "So you'll accept me no matter what?"

She was quiet for a moment. "Is there something you want to tell me, sweetie?" I didn't know how to go about it "Well... I..." My tongue felt huge and dry. "I'm gay" I finally said.

She looked at me, raised an eyebrow, smiled and said. "That's all?". I smiled and said. "Well, I need to talk and... Well... I trust you a lot..." She walked over and gave me a huge hug.

We discussed and chatted for a long while. I feel better.
If only it'd run this smoothly with my parents.

But, anyway, at least my other family accepts me.
:)

Are you serious!? Francois, thats great news! :D

Well, now it's just my real parents.
The rest of the world can go fuck itself.
If they knew, nothing would stop me.

Well done Francois!
Any idea when your gonna tell 'em?

Nope.
None. I'm scared as fuck.

I don't blame you.
Why don't you just do what you did with Anne?

Because Anne is accepting.

I noticed that. she sounds lovely.
If your worried about them disowning you.. wouldnt she allow you to move in?

Anne and James would, yes.

So... your worried about disappointing them then?

Who my parents or Anne and James?

Your parents.

Yeah, I am.
I'm worried they wouldn't accept me.

Perhaps they wont... but I guess you have to make a choice...
Tell them and risk not being accepted by them
Or hide who you really are to make the feel good.

Well, I have to do it eventually.

only you can decide when and how to say it.

I'm thinking kind of along the same line as with Anne, just a little different.

Coming out...damn. I've narrowed it down to two people in my life that I trust the most. Either my 2nd-oldest sister or my closest cousin. I trust them, yeah. But I don't know if I'd trust them enough to, you know...reveal the biggest secret of my life. ._.

Only you can decide that Fauz... I don't know what its like to reveal something like this on a personal level...

And Francois, you do it how and when it feels right.

You need to.
You can't live your life in secret.

I keep considering to do it, but my scaredy-cat nature won't let me.

There's nothing wrong with being scared, but dont let it cloud your judgement.

Come to Australia.
Or wherever. If you really don't feel safe and comfortable there.

Well, to be honest, I'm not even sure how to bring it up in conversation, really. Like I said before, where I live, being gay is the most rarest thing ever. Like, unicorn-level rare.

Really? That rare?

And I can't move yet. ._. I suck at taking care of myself. I can't bring my family to move, either. Wherever they go, I get dragged along. And as far as I know, they aren't going anywhere.

Yes, Sky. THAT rare.

But what about lady-boys, like they have in Malaysia?

Okay, that's fucking at away, but still?

And are your family religious?

fαuzαn | wιld нearт ♥ wrote: "Yes, Sky. THAT rare."

That must be really hard for you...

Lady-boys, as in drag queens? Drag queens here are very different from the ones in other countries. Here, they're always on the streets instead of performing on stage.

Well, my family is religious, yes, but I'm far from it. I'm not even sure what religion I really believe in, but my family is Muslim so I just go along with it.

Thats the worse thing, having to follow it just because they do..