Kaylee > Recent Status Updates

I literally cannot stop reading through the manacled lens 🥲 HIGH REEVE

FUCKER IT SAYS IM NOT 100% DONE BUT ITS OVER??


dammit

Dreor may be zombie, idk I just work here

earlier we said wardens don’t have tacn but here, it’s a blue bull thing. Tsk tsk editors

Can someone remind me what the fuck a dreor is

Whether you are average or renowned fyren butcher, when you are complimented on your attire the one response should be “Thank you, it has pockets”

Shower scene in DMATMOOBIL has nothing on this

How bad of an artist is she

I didn’t want to interrupt the party so I just died instead is impeccably relatable

him dying while also being made to try bean salad is beyond hilarious

69% of the way done ahah

I was brushing my teeth when osric hungwell introduced himself so now I must clean my mirror.

A QUICK WORD TO MENTION THAT HES ACTIVELY DYING

WELL THIS SHIRT IS RUINED

fucking hell I am in tears

and there was only one bed

AND THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED

Welp, he’s fucked. Time to quash

Finding a way to sneak in the headcanon for malfoys deplorable sweet tooth, chefs kiss

Meet my dogs, arson, perjury, and crème brûlée

He fell on the fork? Twenty times?

There are fishnets in this 1866 alternate universe

“Osric, who was not actually a rat fucker, was compelled to clarify”
thank you, my dear Brigitte, for this sentence

The great bootlace massacre of 1866- better known as “touch her and you die”

“You stay here and clutch your pearls”

i am beside myself with this fucking book

“The deofol was now attempting puppy dog eyes, but, given that it was a creature of soul-corroding darkness the endeavor was more perturbing than anything else”

or,

Me, when begging my husband to go and get me a sweet treat

8 centuries past 1066 (Norman conquest, tee hee) 1866??

Is it 1800s out here? We have shrimp and brothels and magic?

Plague and crouton: the reprisal of hormone and crotch

He could think of very few people he trusted more than her to stand behind him 🥹

OhmyGOD okay it’s happening, everybody stay calm. What’s the procedure? What’s the procedure everyone?? STAY FU**ING CALM

will there be hot dogs at the farewell barbecue?

UNDER THE ERECT UNICORN CURLED THE WORDS COME ONE, COME ALL

ah good old fashion cursing.
✨fuck✨

gangrenous fellatio?

brigitte…