Yana L > Recent Status Updates

"On imaging studies, a baby's smile will light up the same reward areas in the mom's brain activated by junk foods or addictive drugs, releasing the same pleasure chemicals and triggering the same high."

If we are not made to feel important for just who we are we may seek significance by becoming compulsive helpers.

While it is clear that our food choices are a matter of personal responsibility, it is important to recognize that we do not make our choices in a vacuum. We select our foods in an environment toxic with govt policies that encourage cheap prices for foods with low nutrient value and in which billions of $ have been spent to convince us to distrust ourselves, to overeat, and .. to eat foods that damage our health.

Don’t latch onto anything you’ve learned as new commandments in the ‘what to eat - what not to eat’ game. That simply sabotages your ability to trust your body’s innate system for taking care of you.

On the sad scale, how are you feeling today? Opening montage of Up sad or Nemo's mom dying sad?

"I don't get why I'm supposed to hate myself so bad just because I'm fat"

“susto is in all of us where we can never forget the bad that has happened to us, and we wait for it to happen to us again or something worse. Some people are crippled by this irrational fear”

“People say to think seven generations ahead when making big decisions. Because our future ancestors, those yet to arrive who will one day become the elders, live with the choices we make today.”

“Auntie told me once that a girl needs at least one grown man in her life who sees her worth as inherent. Values her just as she is, not dependent on her appearance or accomplishments.”

“what if my mom is actually a strong person disguised as someone weak?”

“Who would fault a body that has survived so much and asked for so little?”

“Want some major personal growth? Six months with a preschooler can be more effective than years alone on a mountain top.”

Having healthy relationships is a new task in evolution. For the first couple of million years of evolution, relationships were about survival… We’re newcomers to the idea of having our relationships be about fulfillment, heartfelt communication, and deep commitment to each other.

“Before I had kids, nobody ever mentioned this. How my heart would crack open as a mother, and be filled with worry.”

How does crop rotation apply to a sustainable childhood? … Rest nurtures creativity, which nurtures activity. Activity nurtures rest, which sustains creativity. Each draws from and contributes to the other.”

Activity without downtime is ultimately like a plant without roots/ unsustainable.

“The more knowledge you have, the less likely that other people will make you doubt your parenting skills… if you inform yourself then you’ll protect yourself from the barrage of shoulds and woulds that don’t fit you/your family and that may even have no evidence/supporting facts.”

Acknowledge a child’s contribution… acknowledgement fuels the child’s interest in a task. A child sees that their contribution matters.

When your child “deserves” attention/affection the least is when they need it the most.

“If the feeling of wanting a break feels particularly charged, and seems to be there for most of the time, then dare to remember what it felt like when you were the same age as your child is now.”

“Whatever age your child is, they’re liable to remind you - on a bodily level, of the emotions you went through at a similar age… your child will keep reminding you.


..if you admit this, then you’ll be less likely to be unthinkingly punishing them for whatever they brought up in you.”

“It’s easy to assume our feelings belong with what’s happening in front of us and are not simply a reaction with what’s happened in the past.”

When indulgences look to good, you’re probably doing too much. It’s time to take care of yourself.

“Once you have been trained to trust your thoughts over your feelings, you can be made to believe that bad situations and exploitative people are necessary in your life and even good for you.

.. much of psychotherapy is learning how to respect those messages (feelings).”

“It’s an enormous act of maturity to feel the hurt instead of railing against it.”

“Many times people with emotional injuries are encouraged to shake it off and move on. It’s as if we have a morbid fear of getting stuck in emotional pain and never getting out. We do the same with loss and grieving… the key to successful emotional healing is to accept you won’t be the same afterwards.”

“We repair our emotional injury with mental processing. The body and mind want a thorough healing, not a quick fix. Nature takes its time in ‘rebuilding our bark.’

“When I started feeling the drag of winter, I began to treat myself like a favoured child: with kindness and love. I assumed my needs were reasonable and that my feelings were signals of something important. I kept myself well fed and made sure I was getting enough sleep. I took myself for walks in the fresh air and spent time doing things that soothed me.”

“We need friends who wince along with our pain, who tolerate our gloom, and who allow us to be weak for a while when we’re finding our feet again. We need people who acknowledge that we can’t always hang on. That sometimes everything breaks.”

“There are days when I can say with great certainty that I am not strong enough to manage. And what if I can’t hang on in there? What then? These people might as well be leaning into my face, shouting, Cope! Cope! Cope! while spraying perfume into the air to make it all seem nice.”