Ask the Author: Adiba Jaigirdar
Answered Questions (3)
Adiba Jaigirdar
Hi! Thank you so much for reading! I decided to end things like this because I think it's the reality for a lot of queer people, specifically queer people of colour. In my experience, qpoc prioritise "coming out," less, whether it is with friends or family. It felt realistic to who Ishu is as a person for her to make the choice to not come out to her parents, especially after witnessing how they treated her sister for not adhering to her parents' expectations. I wanted to write a book that hopefully validates both the choice to come out and to not come out at the same time, because I think queer people and specifically qpoc should see the diversity of the "coming out" experience, and that choosing to not come out for whatever reason doesn't de-legitimise queerness. In terms of the lack of a happy resolution between Nik and her parents: again, I think this is just the lived reality for a lot of people. I wanted to write something that felt realistic to Ishu and Nik's family dynamics. I also just wanted to show that a "happy ending" doesn't always have to mean everything is solved and everybody gets along. Sometimes a happy ending can have a little bit of sadness to it too.
Adiba Jaigirdar
Thank you so much! The story has similarities to some of my own experiences, but that's about it. I share marginalisations with the MC so the story it is close to my own heart.
I think that if you read Priti and Nishat's relationship in that way that is very valid. Personally, for me, I think siblings always have rocky moments in their relationships. Sibling relationships are strange because they are often both your family and your friend, especially when you're sisters so close in age like Priti and Nishat. So I don't think they feel as if they're competing against each other, or letting out their frustrations of bridging two worlds with each other. Ultimately, I think Priti has difficulty understanding much of what Nishat is experiencing because for much of her life she and Nishat have shared all of the same things. But in this one thing - sexuality - Nishat is experiencing something wholly different, and going through difficulties. That can be very very jarring for a sibling to experience, when you've shared so much of yourselves and your life with each other to suddenly be confronted with something that you can't experience, understand...or even help your sibling get through. So I think that is part of where the rockiness of their relationship derives from!
I think that if you read Priti and Nishat's relationship in that way that is very valid. Personally, for me, I think siblings always have rocky moments in their relationships. Sibling relationships are strange because they are often both your family and your friend, especially when you're sisters so close in age like Priti and Nishat. So I don't think they feel as if they're competing against each other, or letting out their frustrations of bridging two worlds with each other. Ultimately, I think Priti has difficulty understanding much of what Nishat is experiencing because for much of her life she and Nishat have shared all of the same things. But in this one thing - sexuality - Nishat is experiencing something wholly different, and going through difficulties. That can be very very jarring for a sibling to experience, when you've shared so much of yourselves and your life with each other to suddenly be confronted with something that you can't experience, understand...or even help your sibling get through. So I think that is part of where the rockiness of their relationship derives from!
Adiba Jaigirdar
Thank you for this question! As a queer Bangladeshi, I am really happy to see fellow queer Bangladeshis excited for this book!
I initially simply wanted to write a novel about two girls with competing henna businesses, but the more ideas I had, the more I delved into the characters and story, the more I thought about what it meant to be the people that we are. To be queer, Bangladeshi, Muslim. Or in the case of Flávia, the love interest, to be Brazilian, biracial, Irish, bisexual. And how our identities inform our lives - even when we're in the middle of a romcom.
I initially simply wanted to write a novel about two girls with competing henna businesses, but the more ideas I had, the more I delved into the characters and story, the more I thought about what it meant to be the people that we are. To be queer, Bangladeshi, Muslim. Or in the case of Flávia, the love interest, to be Brazilian, biracial, Irish, bisexual. And how our identities inform our lives - even when we're in the middle of a romcom.
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